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Post by SunnyGirl on Jan 28, 2012 16:21:39 GMT -5
It's not always easy to step back and detach from a friend or loved one, when their addiction is right in your face....
...but I need to remember it's the disease not the person!
I had a reminder of this last night. My younger sis called and was crying and having a major "poor me" episode. She can't seem to grasp the fact that it's her drinking and acting out that drives people away. I love her, but trying to have a conversation when she is drunk is pointless. I had to cut the call very short, but I figure she will call again today. If she is sober, I will speak with her, if not it's pointless to even try.
Peace on the journey, SG
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Post by BW on Jan 29, 2012 1:09:43 GMT -5
No it's not always easy to detach...however when I remember that it takes love to detach, it becomes a might simpler and it is less taxing on me emotionally.
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Post by caressa on Jan 30, 2012 15:48:27 GMT -5
My son told me, look beyond the disease Mom, it is still me. I love him dearly, and even though he is many miles away, I could still buy into his game if I wasn't aware. He thinks I don't understand, he forgets that I was once there. He thinks it is different because he used things that I never used. He hasn't become aware yet that the substance is but a symptom of the disease. It doesn't matter if it is crack, pot, food, alcohol, work, gambling, caretaking, relationships, pills, etc. the problem is me.
I think there were times when I had to detach from myself. Coming from both sides of the street, I can look at the whole picture. Take a look at where I was or am and what I was doing, and stop to think, "Is this good for my recovery?"
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Post by SunnyGirl on Jan 30, 2012 16:38:01 GMT -5
Many thanks to the both of you....
thank you for sharing your ESH!
Peace on the journey, SG
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Post by majestyjo on Jan 27, 2016 19:13:33 GMT -5
I can act out in my dis-ease and slip back into old patterns and behaviours. It is one day at a time. Each day I get to practice my program and live in today and walk with the God of my understanding who gives me the Good Orderly Direction I need to not live through others or think I need to play 'god' with their lives and my own. My emotions can make themselves known physically and visa versa.
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Post by majestyjo on May 28, 2017 1:39:19 GMT -5
Detachment is an act of love. It is different than lovingly detach. When we do that, we keep string attached and it becomes conditional love instead of unconditional love.
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