Enough is Enough

[caressa]

You don't have to pretend to be someone you are not. You don't have to pretend to be strong (if you're a man) or fem (if you're a woman). You don't have to pretend that you don't want to use, if you do. Share what is real. The real you is enough.

I am enough; there is enough.

- Pocket Sponsor

Don't you just love these wise people.

Reality does suck sometimes. We don't always like what we are looking at or where we are at. Those wise people of wisdom set us back on the straight and narrow, and reaffirm us and assure us that we are worthy of recovery.

There is enough for everyone. The supply and demand is endless. There is no race to be run. There is no right way or wrong way to do things. There is only what you need to stay clean and sober in today.

No matter what your drug of choice is, it all leads to the same soul sickness. I know I tried many kinds and they all led back to me.

I had to ask myself. When is enough, enough? When am I going to stop hurting myself by abusing and misusing my body, mind and spirit? I always gave myself promises of tomorrow, only tomorrow never came. I finally got to a stage where I no longer wanted to play Russian Roulette with my life. Enough was enough.



Just for today, I choose not to use.

[BW]

No mask today

[caressa]

Whenever I see male/female, I am reminded of an old meditation that told me that my female side was languishing. Love the word, very descriptive. Our masculine is our survivor instincts according to a therapist.

I was never much for frills, lace, bows, pastels and a lot of things associated with feminine. I am more denim, jersey, cotton, zippersm and leather. I like simple line, perhaps because I had so many curves, be they good or bad, that didn't need exaggerated.

I am also reminded how in early recovery the bigger and the more dangly the earring, the better. Today I seldom remember to put them on and often don't. Sometimes that is because I don't care at other times, it means I don't need them to complete me. Before if they jingled, they made me feel good. I would like to shake my head to hear them, an external thing I used to make me feel better. Nothing wrong with them or it, it was the awareness and the enlightenment that helped me find the freedom of recovery and allowed me to be me.