Understanding Humility

[caressa]

Understanding Humility

"Humility is a result of getting honest with ourselves."

Basic Text p. 35

So many people see the word and associate it with humiliation, put downs and other condescending attitudes directed at people who do no undersand addiction.

Unfortunately, too many people look at the word as having experienced humiliation and have no understanding of the word and want no part of it. Many think, I don't want to go there, already had my dose getting here, and want no more.

The one understanding that stayed with me was, "To become teachable." To get to a stage in my life were I am open to learning and realize I don't know it all, there is more to learn. The more I think I know, the less I do know.

It was the ego and the Self that got me to the doors of recovery. Why should I want to continue acting out in my disease. My disease is not who I am. My disease is when I allow my addiction to take over my life ane remove all the values, principles, and dignities in my life, prior to picking up. So often we blamed others, when in fact it was "Me" who put me here.

For me, it is learning to bow my knees when they are bendable, and saying, "God I don' know, I need help on this one." God answers knee mail. I believe he hears thoughts and heart felt feelings that go out, even if I am not able to always get down on my knee. It is the attitude. It is the honesty. It is the open mind and willingness.

[justjo]

For many years, I thought I was in control. Control was an illusion. I kept thinking, if people would just do what I thought should be done, things would work out. I would plan, and organize, and try to judge things right to the last minute, but things didn't always work out and I got hurt any way. It became humiliation because things didn't work out. I thought it was humble to work things out and get everyone else the answers and what they wanted or needed, and with no thought of what I needed or required.

True humility, is knowing you didn't do all the work. True honesty is not taking all the credit for what is or was done. True humility is admitting that there is more than your way to do things.

As the old song says, "Oh Lord it is hard to be humble when you are perfect in every way." When you are not perfect, it is humiliation to my eyes. It was a failure to be less than perfect. Perfectionism is part of our diseasee. Humility, is admitting you don't know, getting up and trying again. Sometimes it means asking for others for help or just trying to find another way to make things work. If that fails, then you try and try again. It is how you pick yourself up and try again that matters.