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Post by majestyjo on Feb 9, 2017 23:49:46 GMT -5
February 10
Daily Reflections
I DON'T RUN THE SHOW
When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn't. What was our choice to be? ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.53
Today my choice is God. He is everything. For this I am truly grateful. When I think I am running the show I am blocking God from my life. I pray I can remember this when I allow myself to get caught up into self. The most important thing is that today I am willing to grow along spiritual lines, and that God is everything. When I was trying to quit drinking on my own, it never worked; with God and A.A., it is working. This seems to be a simple thought for a complicated alcoholic.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Since I realize that I had become an alcoholic and could never have any more fun with liquor and since I knew that from then on liquor would always get me into trouble, common sense told me that the only thing left for me was a life of sobriety. But I learned another thing in A.A., the most important thing anyone can ever learn, that I could call on a Higher Power to help me keep away from liquor, that I could work with that Divine Principle in the universe and that God would help me to live a sober, useful, happy life. So now I no longer care about the fact that I can never have any more fun with drinking. Have I learned that I am much happier without it?
Meditation For The Day
Like a tree, I must be pruned of a lot of dead branches, before I will be ready to bear good fruit. Think of changed people as trees which have been stripped of their old branches, pruned, cut and bare, but through the dark, seemingly dead branches flows silently, secretly, the new sap, until with the sun of spring, comes new life. There are new leaves, buds, blossoms and fruit, many times better because of the pruning. Remember, I am in the hands of a Master Gardener, who makes no mistakes in His pruning.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may cut away the dead branches of my life. I pray that I may not mind the pruning, since it helps me to bear good fruit later.
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As Bill Sees It
Membership Rules?, p. 41
Around 1943 or 1944, the Central Office asked the groups to list their membership rules and send them in. After they arrived we set them all down. A little reflection upon these many rules brought us to an astonishing conclusion.
If all of these edicts had been in force everywhere at once it would have been practically impossible for any alcoholic to have ever joined A.A. About nine-tenths of our oldest and best members could have never gotten by!
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At last experience taught us that to take away any alcoholic's full chance for sobriety in A.A. was sometimes to pronounce his death sentence, and often to condemn him to endless misery. Who dared to be judge, jury, and executioner of his own sick brother?
1. Grapevine, August 1946 2. 12 & 12, p. 141
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Walk In Dry Places
What is rightfully mine___Personal Gains One of the hard lessons of life is that we can't always "win" in the worldly game for prestige, power, and property. It is especially galling to see rewards going to others that don't seem to have earned them. Much of the world's conflict, in fact, grows out of disputes over what rightfully belongs to whom. In sobriety, we need a higher perspective than what we're likely to find in the brawling world around us. Rather than demanding rights to anything, we should know that everything is part of a spiritual world. The real meaning of the last line of The Lord's Prayer is that all power, prestige, and property belong to our Higher Power. Whatever we have or will acquire is only temporary, at best, and can easily be lost through wrong thinking and bad actions. Emmet Fox, whose writings guided the early A members, taught that we possess things only through "rights of consciousness." In perfectly legitimate ways, we will always possess whatever is necessary for our real work in this life. If one door closes, another will always open. We do not have to envy anything that others possess, nor should we attempt to wrestle it from them. God will always lead us to whatever we need for our highest good. I will not fret this day about any lost property or opportunities. My needs will be met in a satisfactory manner as I continue to seek the highest and best in every situation.
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Keep It Simple
Life didn't promise to be wonderful. ---Teddy Pendergrass Life doesn't promise us anything, except a chance. We have a chance to live any way we like. No matter how we choose to live, we'll have pain and we'll have joy. And we can learn from both. Because of our recovery program, we can have life's biggest wonder---love. We share it in a smile, a touch, a phone call, or a note. We share it with our friends, our partners, our family. Life didn't promise to be wonderful, but it sure is full of little wonders! And we only have to open up and see them, feel them, and let them happen. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see the wonders of life today, in nature, in people's faces, in my own heart. Action for the Day: I can help make a wonderful things happen for others, with a smile, a greeting, a helping hand. What "little" things will I do for somebody today?
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Each Day a New Beginning
God knows no distance. --Charleszetta Waddles As close as our breath is the strength we need to carry us through any troubled time. But our memory often fails us. We try, alone, to solve our problems, to determine the proper course of action. And we stumble. In time we will turn, automatically, to that power available. And whatever our need, it will be met. Relying on God, however we understand God's presence, is foreign to many of us. We were encouraged from early childhood to be self-reliant. Even when we desperately needed another's help, we feared asking for it. When confidence wavered, as it so often did, we hid the fear--sometimes with alcohol, sometimes with pills. Sometimes we simply hid at home. Our fears never fully abated. Finding out, as we all have found, that we have never needed to fear anything, that God was never distant, takes time to sink in. Slowly and with practice it will become natural to turn within, to be God-reliant rather than self-reliant. Whatever our needs today, God is the answer. There is nothing to fear. At last, I have come to know God. All roads will be made smooth.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Under these conditions we naturally make mistakes. Some of them rose out of ignorance of alcoholism. Sometimes we sensed dimly that we were dealing with sick men. Had we fully understood the nature of the alcoholic illness, we might have behaved differently.
p. 107
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
Every so often I took work-related college courses. Spending time with normal people, I began to see how wild I had become. My cherished individualism was turning into isolationism. I had a growing, uneasiness that I was in a vicious circle. I had no friends--only acquaintances. This fact was underscored by the bullet holes in my car, courtesy of one acquaintance I had double-crossed. My only sense of relief was in the bottle, but even that was beginning to fail me. My dreams had long since faded, my direction was unclear, my confidence lost, and the drinking would not restore them as it once had. Personal hygiene became an afterthought. There were times when I would try to live without drinking, but it was difficult, often ending at the most inappropriate times. I cleaned up for special occasions such as holidays, funerals, job interviews, and court dates, only to fail in the final hour, snapping back to the bottle like a rubber band. Planned abstinence was extremely stressful.
p. 505
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
A newcomer appeared at one of these groups, knocked on the door and asked to be let in. He talked frankly with that group's oldest member. He soon proved that his was a desperate case, and that above all he wanted to get well. "But," he asked, "will you let me join your group? Since I am the victim of another addiction even worse stigmatized than alcoholism, you may not want me among you. Or will you?" There was the dilemma. What should the group do? The oldest member summoned two others, and in confidence laid the explosive facts in their laps. Said he, "Well, what about it? If we turn this man away, he'll soon die. If we allow him in, only god knows what trouble he'll brew. What shall the answer be - yes or no?"
pp. 141-142
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"Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind." --Henry James
"You have it easily in your power to increase the sum total of this world's happiness now. How? By giving a few words of sincere appreciation to someone who is lonely or discouraged. Perhaps you will forget tomorrow the kind words you say today, but the recipient may cherish them over a lifetime." --Dale Carnegie
"You will regret many things in life but you will never regret being too kind or too fair." -–Brian Tracy
In the process of growing to spiritual maturity, we all go through many adolescent stages. --Miki L. Bowen
Love is not an exchange of favors. Love is something you give away.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
INSIGHT
"Nothing is more terrible than activity without insight." -- Thomas Carlyle
I believe that recovery can only begin when we "see" or start to get a glimpse of who we are and what we are dealing with . . . insight; an insight into self.
However, the moment we begin to see must be followed by a determined effort to discover more; digging through the denial, pain and manipulation to the disease. Then after discovering the disease in our lives, we must be prepared to risk talking about it --- on a daily basis.
Recovery requires a daily desire to see, discover and talk about our addiction --- with this insight comes recovery.
You are the light of the world; shine through my honesty.
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"Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!" Psalms 150:6
"Remember to welcome strangers, because some who have done this have welcomed angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:2
"Love your neighbor as you love yourself." Galatians 5:14
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Daily Inspiration
Each morning gives us one more chance to pray, one more chance to help another and one more chance to make this a better world. Lord, thank you for working in and through everything.
Not one day passes without receiving wonderful blessings from our loving and generous God. Lord, may I forget the irritations that distract me from Your happiness.
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NA Just For Today
Fun!
"In recovery our ideas of fun change"
Basic Text, p. 102
In retrospect, many of us realize that when we used, our ideas of fun were rather bizarre. Some of us would get dressed up and head for the local club. We would dance, drink and do other drugs until the sun rose. On more than one occasion, gun battles broke out. What we then called fun, we now call insanity.
Today, our notion of fun has changed. Fun to us today is a walk along the ocean, watching the dolphins frolic as the sun sets behind them. Fun is going to an NA picnic, or attending the comedy show at an NA convention. Fun is getting dressed up to go to the banquet and not worrying about any gun battles breaking out over who did what to whom.
Through the grace of a Higher Power and the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous, our ideas of fun have changed radically. Today when we are up to see the sun rise, it's usually because we went to bed early the night before, not because we left a club at six in the morning, eyes bleary from a night of drug use. And if that's all we have received from Narcotics Anonymous, that would be enough.
Just for today: I will have fun in my recovery!
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. A bird does not sing because he has an answer. He sings because he has a song. --Joan Walsh Anglund Each of us has a song to sing, just as birds do. Part of knowing who we are is appreciating our own songs. Are our songs gentle like the robins, or are we brilliant leaders like the bluejay? Are we easy to be around like the sparrow, or do we radiate joy and laughter like the loon? Each of these birds has something special to offer. So do we, with our own unique personalities and talents. What a waste it would be if the loon never dashed across the lake because he wanted to be a robin instead. It is important to learn who we are and to believe we are special in our own way. We give joy to the world around us when we sing our own songs. Have I listened to my own song lately?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's there are few. --Shunryu Suzuki As we travel the path of recovery, we are sometimes overwhelmed by a feeling of how much we lack. It rises within us as a feeling of inadequacy, emptiness, or loneliness. We are in pain because we feel like such beginners. Now we need to discard our competitive thinking, our drive to be on top, and accept another, wiser, way of seeing. The big difference is in being on the path of recovery rather than lost on some diversion, as we have been in the past. It is not important how far along we are or who is ahead of whom. The important thing is that we are on the path and experiencing the process. In recovery, wisdom comes with staying a beginner. Then we remain open to further learning. In some sense this program and our mutual powerlessness are the great levelers. Once on the path, we are all equals. Today, I will appreciate my vulnerability. It keeps me spiritually alive and growing.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Letting Go of Sadness A block to joy and love can be unresolved sadness from the past. In the past, we told ourselves many things to deny the pain: It doesn't hurt that much.... Maybe if I just wait, things will change.... It's no big deal. I can get through this.... Maybe if I try to change the other person, I won't have to change myself. We denied that it hurt because we didn't want to feel the pain. Unfinished business doesn't go away. It keeps repeating itself, until it gets our attention, until we feel it, deal with it, and heal. That's one lesson we are learning in recovery from codependency and adult children issues. Many of us didn't have the tools, support, or safety we needed to acknowledge and accept pain in our past. It's okay. We're safe now. Slowly, carefully, we can begin to open ourselves up to our feelings. We can begin the process of feeling what we have denied so long - not to blame, not to shame, but to heal ourselves in preparation for a better life. It's okay to cry when we need to cry and feel the sadness many of us have stored within for so long. We can feel and release these feelings. Grief is a cleansing process. It's an acceptance process. It moves us from our past, into today, and into a better future - a future free of sabotaging behaviors, a future that holds more options than our past. God, as I move through this day, let me be open to my feelings Today, help me know that I don't have to either force or repress the healing available to me in recovery. Help me trust that if I am open and available, the healing will happen naturally, in a manageable way.
Today I look inside for my answers. Today I will trust my instincts and my connecting to my Higher Power. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Free Yourself from Manipulation
Learn to recognize passive-aggressive hits. Learn to recognize when other people have hidden agendas, when they’re trying to control or manipulate you. When we’re being controlled, we may feel guilty, obligated, indebted. In our muddled state, we agree to another’s wishes but we’re not sure why. Then we wander around feeling uncertain, unbalanced, confused.
The lesson still isn’t about them. The lesson is about how we respond. If their behavior, their energy, is affecting us that strongly, it’s because something in us needs to be healed. A part of us isn’t clear, is still mucked up by something old and outworn, such as guilt or fear. Once we heal ourselves, we will know how to deal with their energy, how to handle their passive-aggressive behavior and their attempts to control us. Then we can thank them for helping trigger our healing process, for helping us grow.
Everything that happens along the way is part of the journey. Everything can be incorporated into our healing process. All roads lead to growth.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say woohoo even if you don’t like where you are
“Once you get into the desert there’s no going back,” said the camel driver.” And when you can’t get back, you have to worry only about the best way of moving forward.” –Paulo Coello, The Alchemist
Sometimes we get into situations and we can easily get out. We date someone, it’s not right for us, and we stop seeing that person. We experiment with drinking or drugs, decide that this isn’t for us, and we stop experimenting. We accept a job, it’s not what we want or hoped it would be, so we leave and find another.We may even marry someone who’s not right for us, and we get out. No children. No excessive property or financial entanglements. It’s a mistake. We’re sorry. There may be a few emotions involved, but correction is relatively painless and easy.
There are other times when it’s not easy. We don’t just date the person. We get married, have one or more children, and then realize we’ve made a mistake. We begin using alcohol or drugs, and wake up one day to find that our life is out of control. What we need to do is stop drinking, and it’s the very thing we can’t do, at least not without help. Or we accept the job or sign a contract, one with serious legal entanglements and consequences.
These are the situations that bring us to our knees. It is in these situations that we work out our destiny. If we’ve hit a point of no return with some situation in our lives, the only way out is through.
Surrender to the experience. You may not have bargained for this, may not have consciously desired it. Learn to say woohoo anyway. You’re meeting your destiny head-on. A spiritual adventure has just begun.
God, help me be gentle with others and myself as we each work out our destinies, karma, and fate. Give me the courage, help, insight, resilience, and grace to learn all the lessons I came here to face.
Activity: Write your memoirs. This is an extensive activity. If you take the time to do it, you will learn much about yourself. Break down your life into stories. Don’t worry about writing a literary masterpiece. Just break your life down into sections and write about what you learned. Write about what you went through– how you thought it would be, what it actually turned into, how you struggled against this, and how you finally saw the light and learned the lesson at hand. We all have ways of keeping a timeline of our lives, for instance, graduation, marriage, divorce, getting that big job, our sobriety date. This is a journal you may want to keep and add to for the rest of your life. It is your book of life. An interesting twist on this activity is to give your memoirs to your children, or ask your parents to do this activity as a gift. Reading your parents’ memoirs can be an enlightening and healing event.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Until now, we may have equated the idea of beginning again with a previous record of failure. This isn’t necessarily so. Like students who finish grade school and begin again in high school, or workers who find new ways to use their abilities, our beginnings must not be tinged with a sense of failure. In a sense, every day is a time of beginning again. We need never look back with regret. Life is not necessarily like a blackboard that must be erased because we didn’t solve problems correctly, but rather a blackboard that must be cleaned to make way for the new. Am I grateful for all that has prepared me for this moment of beginning?
Today I Pray
May I understand that past failures need not hamper my new courage or give a murky cast to my new beginnings. May I know, from the examples of others in The Program, that former failings, once faced and rectified, can be a more solid foundation for a new life than easy-come successes.
Today I Will Remember
Failings can be footings for recovery.
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One More Day
The best thinking has been done in solitude. The worst has been done in turmoil. – Thomas Edison
When the rush of a busy world becomes overwhelming, we can restore ourselves to peace and tranquility. When we feel battered by the stress of the day, it’s time to take a few moments for relaxation. We need to steady ourselves; in fact, we owe it to ourselves.
Solitude, meditation, serenity — these can be ourse if we settle in for a few moments of private time. Alne. Taking this time is not self-indulgent; it’s self-care and simple to do. We can tune the radio to some beautiful, soft music and sit back with a cup of herbal tea. Taking slow breaths, we can allow our bodies to relax with the warmth of the tea, the beauty of the music and the solitude of the moment.
I relish the gift of privacy and relaxation each day.
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One Day At A Time
~ ATTITUDE ~
The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude. Viktor Frankl
I have always found someone like Viktor Frankl to be an inspiration. His attitude to life totally amazes me, especially after suffering and losing all his family in the Nazi concentration camps. How could anyone come away from an experience like that and still find meaning in life, much less meaning in suffering? I certainly could never find any meaning in all the years of suffering through compulsive eating which caused me so much pain. Life didn't seem meaningful at the time, and I wondered if it ever could. But one of the things I have learned in the program is that I can allow myself to wallow in self pity, which I did many times, or I can take the lessons from my life's experiences and use them as opportunities for growth. That has not been an easy one for me in my journey, and there have been many times when life just seemed to be too hard. I wondered whether I had the same strength and positive attitude that Viktor Frankl did. Intellectually I know that attitude is a choice I make. There have been times when I've been depressed and full of self pity and I allowed myself to sink into that abyss of despair. But now, knowing that I have a choice, that I can pick myself up and "act as if," I can have a positive attitude. When I make the positive choice, miraculous things happen, and life somehow seems a lot easier.
One Day at a Time . . . I will make a choice to think positive thoughts, and try to emulate people like Viktor Frankl and others who have battled enormous difficulties and yet kept a positive attitude. When I do that, I know my life will become infinitely better. ~ Sharon ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They flatly declare that since they have come to believe in a Power greater than themselves, to take a certain attitude toward that Power, and to do certain simple things, there has been a revolutionary change in their simple way of living and thinking. - Pg.50 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
In the beginning there probably isn't much time that goes by when you don't think about using. This is normal, after all, you've just lost your constant companion. Only time will remove your constant thoughts of your old buddies, drugs and alcohol, but it does pass.
Every time I think getting high would feel good, let me remember the pain in my gut and fear in my heart just a short time ago.
Getting Even Today
I will push myself through to letting go of some recent insult, knowing that if I don't I bind myself to that energy. Revenge only keeps me stuck at the place of wrong doing. Better to let go the hurt or insult than the act of kindness. If I want to continue to grow my blessings in life, I will look up not down. Today I will look toward someone who has been good to me and I will think of a way to repay their kindness, knowing that when I do that, my own life feels better, too.
I connect myself to the energy of goodness.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Do not ask what your Higher Power can do for you, but rather what you can do for your Higher Power. This gets us out of self.
Dear God, what can I do for you today?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Formula for failure: try to please everyone.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I look inside for my answers. Today I will trust my instincts and my connecting to my Higher Power.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
An alcoholic is anyone I don't like who drinks more than me. - Dylan Thomas.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 10, 2017 19:04:08 GMT -5
February 11
Daily Reflections
THE LIMITS OF SELF-RELIANCE
We asked ourselves why we had them [fears]. Wasn't it because self-reliance failed us? ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.68
All of my character defects separate me from God's will. When I ignore I disagreeociation with Him I face the world and my alcoholism alone and must depend on self-reliance. I have never found security and happiness through self-will and the only result is a life of fear and discontent. God provides the path back to Him and to His gift of security and comfort. First, however, I must be willing to acknowledge my fears and understand their source and power over me. I frequently ask God to help me understand how I separate myself from Him.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
If we're going to stay sober, we've got to learn to want something else more than we want to drink. When we first came into A.A., we couldn't imagine wanting anything else so much or more than drinking. So we had to stop drinking on faith, on faith that someday we really would want something else more than drinking. But after we've been in A.A. for a while, we learn that a sober life can really be enjoyed. We learn how nice it is to get along well with our family at home, how nice it is to do our work well at the office, how nice it is to try to help others. Have I found that when I keep sober, everything goes well for me?
Meditation For The Day
There is almost no work in life so hard as waiting. And yet God wants me to wait. All motion is more easy than calm waiting, and yet I must wait until God shows me His will. So many people have marred their work and hindered the growth of their spiritual lives by too much activity. If I wait patiently, preparing myself always, I will be some day at the place where I would be. And much toil and activity could not have accomplished the journey so soon.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may wait patiently. I pray that I may trust God and keep preparing myself for a better life.
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As Bill Sees It
Self-Confidence and Will Power, p. 42
When first challenged to admit defeat, most of us revolted. We had approached A.A. expecting to be taught self-confidence. Then we had been told that so far as alcohol was concerned, self-confidence was no good whatever; in fact, it was a total liability. There was no such thing as personal conquest of the alcoholic compulsion by the unaided will.
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It is when we try to make our will conform with God's that we begin to use it rightly. To all of us, this was a most wonderful revelation. Our whole trouble had been the misuse of willpower. We had tried to bombard our problems with it instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us. To make this increasingly possible is the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps.
12 & 12 1. p. 22 2. p. 40
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Walk In Dry Places
Practice makes patience. Acquiring Maturity Extreme impatience is part of most alcoholic stories: "I want what I want when I want it." When it continues in sobriety, impatience leads to mistakes and accidents. How can we bring impatience under control without losing all drive and initiative? One route may be to acquire patience through practice. We can devote some time each day to a task that must be done, even if it is tedious and boring. We can make a real effort to be more patient with somebody who is slow or difficult. We can face the fear and anxiety that sometimes make us overwork or turn us into people-pleasers. These exercises won't eliminate impatience overnight. But they'll produce the satisfaction of knowing that we're getting control of our lives. They will also make us more effective in our dealings with others. Reminding ourselves that all outcomes aqre in God's hands can help us acquire patience. Willful pushing does not bring the serenity and well being we really seek. We labor in vain if we are seeking goals that are not in line with God's will for us. I will do my work today with the knowledge that God really is in charge of my life… I do not have to let anything or anyone rob me of my serenity and self-control. I will practice patience in situations where it is needed.
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Keep It Simple
Sanity is madness put to good use.---George Santayana In Step Two we come to believe a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. In a way, as we work Step Two, we're praying that our madness can be put to good use. This is just what happens. Addiction was wrecking our life. But it's also our addiction that forced us into a new way of life. As long as we remember what our madness was like, we can put it to good use. When we feel like giving up, let's remember our madness. It will help us go on. When we see someone suffering from the illness of addiction, let's remember our days of madness. It will help us be there for that person. It's also good to remember that our madness is only a pill or a drink away. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I believe You can put my madness to good use. I give up my madness; do with it what You want. Action for the Day: I'll list a couple ways my Higher Power and I have changed my madness into sanity.
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Each Day a New Beginning
It's odd that you can get so anesthetized by your own pain or your own problem that you don't quite fully share the hell of someone close to you. --Lady Bird Johnson Preoccupation with self can be the bane of our existence. It prevents all but the narrowest perspective on any problem. It cuts off any guidance from our higher power that may be offered through a friend. It blocks whatever truths are trying to gain our attention. The paradox is that whatever our pain, it is lessened by turning our attention elsewhere, to another's pain or her joy. When we open our minds to fresh input from others, insights emerge. We need the messages others are trying to give us. Nothing that is said in a loving spirit is empty of meaning for our lives. We might consider that every conversation we have is a conversation with our Creator. What we need to know, for our own growth, is guaranteed to be revealed in our many conversations with others. But we can't hear another's thoughts until we let go of our own. Full attention to the persons sent to me will offer me exactly what I need, today. My inner guide has beckoned them. I can be alert, expect solutions, and celebrate the wonder of it all.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
How could men who loved their wives and children be so unthinking, so callous, so cruel? There could be no love in such persons, we thought. And just as we were being convinced of their heartlessness, they would surprise us with fresh resolves and new attentions. For a while they would be their old sweet selves, only to dash the new structure of affection to pieces once more. Asked why they commenced to drink again, they would reply with some silly excuse, or none. It was so baffling, so heartbreaking. Could we have been so mistaken in the men we married? When drinking, they were strangers. Sometimes they were so inaccessible that it seemed as though a great wall had been built around them.
p. 107
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
The downward spiral of my life began making smaller circles. My driving record included accidents and a ticket list that would raise a policeman's eyebrows. When I carried insurance, it was high risk. I grew sneakier and less outwardly defiant. Despite breaking laws routinely for years, I stayed out of big trouble for the most part. A few times they almost had me, but I managed to scam on technicalities or I got another break. Finally an indiscretion committed years earlier came back to haunt me. I was about to have a forced encounter with the federal judicial system. I began to feel like a clown juggling too many balls. Each ball represented a problem I was keeping in the air. My arms were weary and I knew I couldn't keep on much longer, but I was not about to give up. My pride and ego wouldn't let me. Bosses, judges, co-workers, lawyers, car notes, bar tabs, loan sharks, utility payments, landlords, my girlfriend, people I had double-crossed--I looked too all these as the source of my problems, while overlooking the most basic problem: my drinking and myself. I'd known for a long time that I desperately wanted off this merry-go-round, but I had no idea how to do it.
pp. 505-506
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
At first the elders could look only at the objections. "We deal," they said, "with alcoholics only. Shouldn't we sacrifice this one for the sake of the many?" So went the discussions while the newcomer's fate hung in the balance. Then one of the three spoke in a very different voice. "What we are really afraid of," he said, "is our reputation. We are much more afraid of what people might say than the trouble this strange alcoholic might bring. As we've been talking, five short words have been running through my mind. Something keeps repeating to me, "What would the Master do?" "Not another word was said. What more indeed could be said?
p. 142
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Serenity isn't freedom from the storm, it is peace within the storm.
When we release the bitterness, judgment and blame of the past, whether of ourselves or others, the past becomes a stepping stone to spiritual growth, to increased compassion, understanding and love. Today, repeat several times, "I bless my past and see it as a stepping stone to greater good." --Mary Manin Morrissey
Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. --William Arthur Ward
Great Spirit, grant that I may not criticize my neighbor until I have walked a mile in his moccasins. --Native American Proverb
Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man's growth without destroying his roots. --Frank A. Clark
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PITY
"When a man has pity on all living creatures, then only is he noble." -- Buddha
We all need each other. More than this, we need to help and sustain each other. And this concept extends beyond human beings --- the world is full of other creatures that God has made and which make our lives so fascinating and entertaining. Animals and plants make up our ecological history and yet so often we rob and hurt our environment.
Recovery from alcoholism means more than putting down "the drink". Today I am picking up a responsible attitude that makes me care, on a spiritual level, for my world.
Lord, as I look around my world I cannot help but worship You.
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If we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him. 1 John 5:14-15
"I sought the Lord, and he answered me, and delivered me from all my fears. Look to him, and be radiant. Psalm 34:4-5
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Daily Inspiration
God will answer our prayers if we believe, but first we must ask. Lord, I need the strength that only You can give.
God will give you strength because He will give of Himself. Lord, thank You for the many gifts of which You always bless me.
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NA Just For Today
A Curse Into A Blessing
"We have become very grateful in the course of our recovery.... We have a disease, but we do recover" Basic Text, p. 8
Active addiction was no picnic; many of us barely came out of it alive. But ranting against the disease, lamenting what it has done to us, pitying ourselves for the condition it has left us in—these things can only keep us locked in the spirit of bitterness and resentment. The path to freedom and spiritual growth begins where bitterness ends, with acceptance.
There is no denying the suffering brought by addiction. Yet it was this disease that brought us to Narcotics Anonymous; without it, we would neither have sought nor found the blessing of recovery. In isolating us, it forced us to seek fellowship. In causing us to suffer, it gave us the experience needed to help others, help no one else was so uniquely suited to offer. In forcing us to our knees, addiction gave us the opportunity to surrender to the care of a loving Higher Power.
We would not wish the disease of addiction on anyone. But the fact remains that we addicts already have this disease— and further, that without this disease we may never have embarked on our spiritual journey. Thousands of people search their whole lives for what we have found in Narcotics Anonymous: fellowship, a sense of purpose, and conscious contact with a Higher Power. Today, we are grateful for everything that has brought us this blessing.
Just for today: I will accept the fact of my disease, and pursue the blessing of my recovery.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Life deals more rigorously with some than others. --Lewis F. Presnall How often we think about a friend, He sure is lucky! And probably just as often we say to ourselves, Why did that happen to me? It's not fair! The truth is, life isn't always fair. We don't all get the same experiences, the same lessons. But we each learn what we need to learn in order to fulfill our destiny. We have to learn to trust. Maybe a bike gets stolen or a friend moves away. It's not easy to accept such things as these, but we must all learn to understand and accept losses in our lives. Perhaps we fail a test. The lesson we learn from this may be to study harder or to consider a different course of study in school. There are always reasons for why things happen, but we don't have to know them. Can I trust in the lessons of my failures today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. Too much agreement kills a chat. --Eldridge Cleaver Many of us haven't learned there is room for disagreement in a relationship. Some men who grew up in addicted families saw a lot of pain, anger, and quarreling. Many learned to be always pleasing and agreeable, no matter how they felt. Others took it as a personal insult when someone disagreed with them. We choke the vitality and excitement in our love relationships if we are too intent on avoiding conflict. Nothing can be resolved if we smooth everything over. Differences between people don't just go away. If we don't bring them out, they fester and create silent tension or boredom. If we willingly express our thoughts and feelings, we can learn how to resolve our disagreements and to appreciate each other for our differences as well as our similarities. If two people in a relationship were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary. Today, I will try to be more open about my differences with people, not as a way of fighting, but as a way of letting them know me better.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Divinely Led Send me the right thought, word, or action. Shaw me what my next step should be. In times of doubt and indecision please send your inspiration and guidance. --Alcoholics Anonymous The good news of surrendering ourselves and our life to a Power greater than ourselves is that we come into harmony with a Grand Plan, one greater than we can imagine. We are promised Divine Guidance if we ask for it if we work the Twelve Steps. What greater gift could we receive than knowing our thoughts, words, and actions are being directed? We aren't a mistake. And we don't have to control or repress others or ourselves for life to work out. Even the strange, the unplanned, the painful, and those things we call errors can evolve into harmony. We will be guided into understanding what we need to do to take care of ourselves. We will begin to trust our instincts, our feelings, and our thoughts. We will know when to go, to stop, and to wait. We will learn a great truth: the plan will happen in spite of us not because of us. I pray today and each day that my thoughts, words, and actions may be Divinely led. I pray that I can move forward in confidence, knowing my steps are guided.
Even in moments of doubting, I know that my Higher Power has been guiding me on my path today. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart The Universe Is Abundant
Watch out for greed-- greed for money, for resources, for love. Greed can slowly corrupt the heart. Greed can slowly take over our lives. Greed and fear can block our connection with the universe, and with universal love.
Let go of the fears of deprivation, of doing without, that haunt you from the past. Having more and more won't solve your problem if what you need is to heal your fears. Look around with love at your life and the people in it. If you open your heart and look without fear, you may see that you have enough now.
Go back to your heart. Let love, not fear and greed, lead the way. Be led by your desire to joyfully serve, by the desire to bring your gifts, your healing, your comforts and talents to others. Go back to your heart as often as you need. And remember what is honorable and true. Say to those you love. This is what I shall give. And I'll give it because my heart leads me to do so.
The universe is abundant. Take your part, take your place, in universal love. Go back to your heart. Give from the heart. And the universe will respond in kind.
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more language of letting go Grief
No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing. ... Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe such dreadful things about Him. The conclusion I dread is not "So there's no God after all," but " So this is what God's really like. Deceive yourself no longer." --C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
There's no way to prepare for deep grief, for the pain that shatters a heart and a life when a beloved leaves.
No one can coach us on it. Those who could, who knew exactly how it felt; who could describe it in detail, wouldn't do it, would not presume to encroach on this most intimate part of our relationship with a loved one. Those who casually say, "Aren't you over that yet?" don't understand.
This much I will tell you about grief. If there was ever a second, or a moment, when you suspected or knew you had been betrayed at the deepest level by someone you adored, and a splintering pain began to shred your heart, turn your world grimly unbearable to the point where you would consciously choose denial and ignorance about the betrayal rather than feel this way, that is one-millionth of what it feels like to grieve.
Grief is not an abnormal condition, nor is it something to be treated with words. It is a universe, a world, unto itself. If you are called to enter this world, there is no turning back. We are not allowed to refuse that call. Grief is like nothing else, with the possible exception of the pounding waves of the ocean. To the untrained, casual eye, each wave looks the same. It is not. No two are the same. And each one washes away the old, and washes in the new.
Gradually, almost imperceptibly, whether we believe it or not, we are being transformed.
God, take care of me those moments and hours when I cannot find the will or power to take care of myself. Transform me, if not in the twinkling of an eye, then over the slow movement of the years, into who I will become.
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A Day at a Time
Reflection for the Day I can always take strength and comfort from knowing I belong to a worldwide fellowship. Hundreds and hundreds of thousands, just like myself, are working together for the same purpose. None of us needs to ever be alone again, because each of us in our own way works for the good of others. We are bound together by a common problem that can be solved by love and understanding and mutual service. The Program – like the little wheel in the old hymn – runs by the grace of God.
Have I thanked God today for helping me to find The Program, which is showing me the way to a new life?
Today I Pray May my thanks be lifted to God each day for dispelling my self-inflicted loneliness, for warming my stoicism, for leading me to the boundless fund of friendship in The Program.
Today I Will Remember I have a world of friends.
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One More Day
“You are responsible for your own life and have a job to perform in your healthcare.” – Neil A. Fiore
It’s a real shock to find out that we have an ongoing medical problem. Lots of us may get quite angry and blame the doctor for the diagnosis. Or we may want to turn it all over to the professionals. But soon we begin to see that we are the primary ones responsible for ourselves. Eventually, we begin to give full cooperation to our doctors and therapist. We become equal members of our healthcare team.
Adjustments are difficult in the best of circumstance, but with the help of those who love us, with the assistance of our doctors, and with our participation, we adjust to chronic illness. Then we can see our problems in their proper perspective and begin again to enjoy our lives.
In accepting changes in my life, I find balance once again.
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One Day At A Time
FREEDOM
“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” Judy Garland
As far back as I can remember I always wanted to be like -- or act like -- someone else. I never allowed myself the freedom to be me. I was my parents' child, my husband's wife, and my children's mother. It wasn't until I came into program wearing all of my identities on my body -- 150 pounds’ worth -- that I was able to see how unhappy I really was.
I began my journey to recovery by slowly discovering the real me underneath all that extra weight. Working the Twelve Steps of recovery helped me to peel away the layers of fear that kept me stuck.
One Day at a Time . . . I am free to be me ~ And I am enough. ~ Eileen
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
But what about the real alcoholic? He may start off as a moderate drinker; he may or may not become a continuous hard drinker; but at some stage of his drinking career he begins to lose all control of his liquor consumption, once he starts to drink. - Pg. 21 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Even when we consciously don't think we want to get high, our disease of addiction works through our subconscious and calls, 'what do they know; just one won't hurt; well, if they're going to be like that!' Our subconscious pops silly excuses for using into our minds. We must learn to recognize and neutralize these thoughts.
May my subconscious 'arguments' that subtly tell me to use, have no power to influence my true goal of staying clean and clear.
I Can Lift My Own Spirits
I will lift my own spirits today. I will look for that place in me that is still and serene, that isn't just constantly in response mode. Somewhere there is a constant, meditative place where the little and even the even big concerns of the day slip away and become less important. A place where life is just life and I can breathe in and out of a place of inner calm. Life doesn't have to prove itself to me today for me to treasure it. It is enough that I am here, that I have my freedom of thought and movement. I will appreciate the life I have.
I am connected with the divine
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
People who seek a sponsor without faults, will be without a sponsor.
I know that my sponsor is willing to make mistakes, if I am willing to learn from them.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Focus on the program, not the problem.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Even in moments of doubting I know that my Higher Power has been guiding me on my path today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I wanted to be Clint Eastwood but I was more like Woody Allen. - Trip S.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 12, 2017 0:11:54 GMT -5
February 12
Daily Reflections
"THE ROOT OF OUR TROUBLES"
Selfishness--self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of all our troubles. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 62
How amazing the revelation that the world, and everyone in it, can get along just fine with or without me. What a relief to know that people, places and things will be perfectly okay without my control and direction. And how wordlessly wonderful to come to believe that a power greater than me exists separate and apart from myself. I believe that the feeling of separation I experience between me and God will one day vanish. In the meantime, faith must serve as the pathway to the center of my life.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
As we look back on all those troubles we used to have when we were drinking, the hospitals, the jails, we wonder how we could have wanted that kind of life. As we look back on it now, we see our drinking life as it really was and we're glad we're out of it. So after a few months in A.A., we find that we can honestly say that we want something else more than drinking. We've learned by experience that a sober life is really enjoyable and we wouldn't go back to the old drunken way of living for anything in the world. Do I want to keep sober a lot more than I want to get drunk?
Meditation For The Day
My spiritual life depends on an inner consciousness of God. I must be led in all things by my consciousness of God and I must trust Him in all things. My consciousness of God will always bring peace to me. I will have no fear, because a good future lies before me as long as I keep my consciousness of God. If in every single happening, event and plan I am conscious of God, then no matter what happens, I will be safe in God's hands.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have this ever-consciousness of God. I pray for a new and better life through this God consciousness.
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As Bill Sees It
How Much Anonymity?, p. 43
As a rule, the average newcomer wanted his family to know immediately what he was trying to do. He also wanted to tell others who had tried to help him--his doctor, his minister, and close friends. As he gained confidence, he felt it right to explain his new way of life to his employer and business associates. When opportunities to be helpful came along, he found he could talk easily about A.A. to almost anyone.
These quiet disclosures helped him to lose his fear of the alcoholic stigma, and spread the news of A.A.'s existence in his community. Many a man and woman came to A.A. because of such conversations. Since it is only at the top public level that anonymity is expected, such communications were well within its spirit.
12 & 12, pp. 185-186
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Walk In Dry Places
Do it sober___ Practicing Principles There may be a hidden meaning in that bumper sticker that reminds us to "Do it Sober," but we can also read it to mean that real sobriety should guide everything we do today. Real sobriety is emotional sobriety. We have it when our principles protect us from overpowering feelings growing out of greed, fear, and resentment. Even without the bottle, an attack of fear or resentment can distort personal judgment and lead to foolish mistakes. Whatever we do, whether it's sweeping a factory floor or leading a corporate board meeting, we should do with confidence and calm self-control. When we work in this way, we help others. We only harm them if we bring bitterness and resentment into their space. True emotional sobriety helps us set a better example and assures others that AA really works in people's lives. One AA member was pleasantly surprised when he was complimented for remaining calm in confrontations with angry people. HE realized that his AA principles had been at work in his workplace, helping him to maintain a calm dignity that made him assertive and effective. Whatever we do sober, we always do better. Today I'll remind myself to stay emotionally as well as physically sober. So-called Dry Drunks are not slips, but they destroy my effectiveness and should have no place in my life.
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Keep It Simple
We are always the same age inside.---Gertrude Stein Deep inside, we each have a child's spirit. We still have many of the feelings we had when we were young. Some of us have a hurting child inside. There's sadness, fear, or anger that hasn't gone away. We're still lonely, no matter how many people care about us. Our inner child needs special help to heal. We can be good parents to our inner child. We do this by being gentle and caring with ourselves. In time, this child can be a happy center in our hearts. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, please heal the child inside of me a little more each day. Help my inner child be alive, free, and full of joy. Action for the Day: Right now, I'll close my eyes for a minute. I'll think kind thoughts about myself. Than I'll say out loud, "Inner child, I love you. I'll take good care of you." I'll do this two more times today.
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Each Day a New Beginning
There are no new truths, but only truths that have not been recognized by those who have perceived them without noticing. --Mary McCarthy We understand today ideas we couldn't grasp yesterday. We are conscious this year of details of our past that we may have glossed over at the time. Our blinders are slowly giving way, readying us for the truths we couldn't absorb before. "When the student is ready, the teacher appears." And the teacher comes bearing truths that we need to assimilate into our growing bank of knowledge. The truths we may be given today, or any day, won't always make us happy immediately. We may learn that a job is no longer right for us. Or that a relationship has reached an end. And the impending changes create unrest. But in the grand scheme of our lives, the changes wrought by these truths are good and will contribute in time to our happiness. Let's celebrate the truths as they come and trust the outcome to God. We are traveling a very special road. The way is rocky. The bends limit our vision, but we will be given all the direction we need. The truths I receive today will guide my steps. I shall move in peace.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
And even if they did not love their families, how could they be so blind about themselves? What had become of their judgment, their common sense, their will power? Why could they not see that drink meant ruin to them? Why was it, when these dangers were pointed out that they agreed, and then got drunk again immediately?
pp. 107-108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
The judge had no trouble coming up with a few ideas, however. I got house arrest with electronic monitoring and strictly supervised probation with random urinalysis for openers. Five years in the penitentiary waited after that. I still played the angles, until it became clear to the authorities that I could not live up to the conditions of my probation. It didn't matter what the consequences were--I couldn't not drink, and I gave up trying. When the court eventually called me in for my violations, they gave me two choices: get help or go to jail. After careful thought I chose the first. Now either they were going to send me someplace, or I could send myself. I chose the second, and they gave me a week to make arrangements. Procrastinating to the end, it took me three. This is when, once again, desperate, cornered, and at my lowest, I said the only prayer I still knew: "God help me--if you get me out of this one, I'll never do it again." My life was finally out of my control.
p. 506
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Overjoyed, the newcomer plunged into Twelfth Step work. Tirelessly he laid A.A.'s message before scores of people. Since this was a very early group, those scores have since multiplied themselves into thousands. Never did he trouble anyone with his other difficulty. A.A. had taken its first step in the formation of Tradition Three.
p. 142
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When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.
May I be an example to those whose lives touch mine. --Shelley
The man who removes a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. --Chinese Proverb
Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another. --Walter Elliott
There is no pillow so soft as a clear conscience. --French Proverb
You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FREEDOM
"Freedom comes from human beings, rather than from laws and institutions." -- Clarence Darrow
The disease of alcoholism does not live in bottles or books. It lives in people. Drug problems are people problems. Sobriety exists in the man, not the theory.
In this sense recovery must be experienced, rather than simply talked about. The Program is essentially not written in books or taught in lecture rooms but is lived in the lives of people; the program stems from the heart of man.
I believe the program is that spark of divinity that God has bestowed upon all of us --- and we must discover it within.
Teach me to remember that to think a smile without revealing a smile is to be grumpy.
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May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalms 19:14
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Ephesians 6:10
But you, O Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, and the one who lifts up my head. Psalm 3:3
Praise the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens. Praise him for his acts of power; praise him for his surpassing greatness. Praise him with the sounding of the trumpet, praise him with the harp and lyre, praise him with tambourine and dancing, praise him with the strings and flute, praise him with the clash of cymbals, praise him with resounding cymbals. Let everything that has breath praise the LORD. Praise the LORD. Psalm 150
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Daily Inspiration
Closeness with family makes us one in heart and mind. Lord, help me to fill our home with love and make it our safe haven from the troubles of the world.
Forget what you have done for others and remember what they have done for you. Lord, a gift is given freely with no expectation. May I become a truly giving person.
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NA Just For Today
Living In The Moment "We regretted the past, dreaded the future, and weren't too thrilled about the present." Basic Text, p. 7
Until we experience the healing that happens when we work the Twelve Steps, it is doubtful that we can find a statement more true than the quote above. Most of us come to NA hanging our heads in shame, thinking about the past and wishing we could go back and change it. Our fantasies and expectations about the future may be so extreme that, on our first date with someone, we find ourselves wondering which lawyer we'll use for the divorce. Almost every experience causes us to remember something from the past or begin projecting into the future.
At first, it's difficult to stay in the moment. It seems as though our minds won't stop. We have a hard time just enjoying ourselves. Each time we realize that our thoughts are not focused on what's happening right now, we can pray and ask a loving God to help us get out of ourselves. If we regret the past, we make amends by living differently today; if we dread the future, we work on living responsibly today.
When we work the steps and pray each time we discover we're not living in the present, we'll notice that those times aren't occurring as often as they used to. Our faith will help us live just for today. We'll have hours, even days, when our full attention is focused on the current moment in time, not the regrettable past or fearful future.
Just for today: When I live fully in each moment, I open myself to joys that might otherwise escape me. If I am having trouble, I will ask a loving God for help.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Oh, a trouble's a ton, or a trouble's an ounce, Or a trouble is what you make it, And it isn't the fact that you're hurt that counts, But only how you take it. --Edmund Vance Cooke Once, a woman decided to throw a problem-exchange party. As guests arrived, they shed all their personal problems and tossed them onto a pile with everyone else's. After all had discussed their own problem for others to hear, the party ended with guests selecting from the problem pile those they wished to carry away. Each person left with the same troubles he or she had brought to the party. We who worry a great deal about our problems are always sure no one else has troubles as bad as ours. Too often, we complain, "If you had my problems, you'd really hurt." Our problems are tailored to us, and geared to help us learn by solving them. No one else's would be quite right. When we cope with problems, rather than wailing about them, we discover that our own are minor irritations compared to those we see in others. What problems am I lucky to have?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to the light I have. --Abraham Lincoln With too much focus on control, we men have been preoccupied by our overemphasis on outcomes. We say winning is everything, and the way we play the game doesn't matter. We give honor to a man who has accumulated great wealth, regardless of how he has lived. We develop sexual problems because we focus on performance and achieving orgasm rather than on the joy of loving. As our integrity grows, our emphasis changes. It is not crucial that we always be right, only that we be honest. We do not have to be winners or high achievers so much as we have to be real human beings. Conquest is not as important as connection. We do not always have to compare ourselves and be better than the next guy. We can exchange and appreciate the communication. Today, I will grow in my relationships with others by being more true to myself and less driven toward a particular outcome.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge it is cold and dark. We stood there with others in the cold and darkness, doubled over in pain. Some of us developed an eating disorder to cope with the pain. Some drank; some used other drugs. Some of us lost control of our sexual behavior. Some of us obsessively focused on addicted people's pain to distract us from our own pain. Many of us did both: we developed an addictive behavior, and distracted ourselves by focusing on other addicted people. We did not know there was a bridge. We thought we were trapped on a cliff. Then, some of us got lucky. Our eyes opened, by the Grace of God, because it was time. We saw the bridge. People told us what was on the other side: warmth, light, and healing from our pain. We could barely glimpse or imagine this, but we decided to start the trek across the bridge anyway. We tried to convince the people around us on the cliff that there was a bridge to a better place, but they wouldn't listen. They couldn't see it; they couldn't believe. They were not ready for the journey. We decided to go alone, because we believed, and because people on the other side were cheering us onward. The closer we got to the other side, the more we could see, and feel, that what we had been promised was real. There was light, warmth, healing, and love. The other side was a better place. But now, there is a bridge between those on the other side and us. Sometimes, we may be tempted to go back and drag them over with us, but it cannot be done. No one can be dragged or forced across this bridge. Each person must go at his or her own choice, when the time is right. Some will come; some will stay on the other side. The choice is not ours. We can love them. We can wave to them. We can holler back and forth. We can cheer them on, as others have cheered and encouraged us. But we cannot make them come over with us. If our time has come to cross the bridge, or if we have already crossed and are standing in the light and warmth, we do not have to feel guilty. It is where we are meant to be. We do not have to go back to the dark cliff because another's time has not yet come. The best thing we can do is stay in the light, because it reassures others that there is a better place. And if others ever do decide to cross the bridge, we will be there to cheer them on. Today, I will move forward with my life, despite what others are doing or not doing. I will know it is my right to cross the bridge to a better life, even if I must leave others behind to do that. I will not feel guilty. I will not feel ashamed. I know that where I am now is a better place and where I'm meant to be.
As I let go of all the negative tapes that block my truth, I trust and follow the energy that leads me to peace and joy. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Fill Your World with Color and Beauty
Fill your life and your world with the colors, textures, scents, and objects that are beautiful to you, that have meaning to you. Remember that we are connected to our environment. The objects and the colors in our world have energy and meaning. They have an impact on us.
The more we see how connected we are, the more carefully and thoughtfully we may want to choose the items we place in our home, or our space at work, if we have a special area, because these objects and colors can reflect how we feel about ourselves and what is important to us.
Objects have energy. They have energy already in them when we obtain them, and they have the energy and meaning we attribute to them. Choose carefully the possessions you want around you, for they tell a story all day long.
Fill your world, your life, with objects that are beautiful and have special meaning to you. What articles and hues have you surrounded yourself with at home, at work? Is there a special article you want close to you, on your desk, in your locker, in your pocket? What story do these things tell about you, about what you’re going through, about your place in your journey?
Choose objects and colors that make your heart smile.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Starting over
How many times do we have to start over?
Many changes in our lives signal a major ending or beginning: death, birth, graduation, marriage, divorce, moving to a new home, getting sober, losing a job, or beginning a new career. We look around and think, Here we go. I’m starting over again.
Sometimes we don’t catch on at first. Sometimes it just feels like day after day of the same old thing as the old fades away and the new begins. Sometimes it feels like our lives have just stopped. Whether we believe it or not, when one cycle ends, a new one begins.
If life as you have known it is disappearing, it may be time to let go. Even if you can’t see it now– and you probably can’t– a new life will begin fading in to take its place. You and your life are being transformed.
How many times do we have to start over? As many times as life as we know it ends.
Say woohoo. You’re being born again.
God, help me trust that a new life awaits me if life as I’ve known it is fading away. Give me the patience and trust to sink joyfully into the void.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I am grateful for my friends in The Program. Right now I am aware of the blessings of friendship — the blessings of meeting, of sharing, of smiling, of listening, and of being available when needed. right now I know that if I want a friend, I must be a friend. Will i vow, this day, to be a better friend to more people? Will I strive, this day — in my thoughts, words and actions — to disclose the kind of friend I am?
Today I Pray
May I restore in kind to the fellowship of The Program the friendship I have so hungrily taken from it. After years of glossing my lonely existence with superficial acquaintanceship, may I learn again the reciprocal joys of caring and sharing.
Today I Will Remember
Be A Friend.
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One More Day
I am where I am because I believe in life’s possibilities. – Oprah Winfrey
During the years of our youth we were continually reminded, “You can do it. Just set a goal and then reach a little beyond it.” Many of us were better at this as youngsters than we are as adults. We each have fought our own battles — to become educated or perhaps to achieve a promotion or new job. We tend to get a little short-sighted when a new variable enters the picture — a changing health pattern.
Too many of us back away, fearful the we’ll have all we can do to just orchestrate our own health care. It’s imperative that we continue to believe in ourselves as human beings with great potential — it matters less that we reach each goal. It matters most that we try.
I am setting new goals that offer challenge and the chance for success.
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One Day At A Time
~ POSITIVE THINKING ~
"We could accomplish many more things if we did not think of them as impossible" Jean-Jacques Rousseau from his "Lettres à M. de Malesherbes
I have spent a lifetime dieting. My life can be easily separated into two sections: the dieting periods and the non-dieting, or bingeing, periods. When I first start losing weight, I am positive about it, to the point where, if I go clothes shopping, I even buy things in smaller sizes because soon I won't be as big as I am. This works fine while I'm losing weight, but when I reach a plateau and remain at the same weight level for a while, or even worse, gain a bit, I start to think that I'll never lose the weight I need to lose, that my sticking to a "diet" for the rest of my life is nigh to impossible.
Well, with stinking thinking like this, I'm defeated before I've even started. Through this program, I've learned that anything is possible. First of all, it's true that sticking to a diet for the rest of my life would be an impossible feat, but in program we don't "go on diets." We follow a sensible eating plan, and this plan should be flexible enough that it IS something we can follow indefinitely. Secondly, I have to correct my time spans. Instead of thinking of it as "the rest of my life," I have the option to think of it as "One Day at a Time," and we can do anything for just one day, can't we?
One day at a time ... I remember that's all it takes...one day at a time. Marjee
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
In any meeting, anywhere, A.A.'s share experience, strength, and hope with each other, in order to stay sober and help other alcoholics. Modem-to-modem or face-to-face, A.A.'s speak the language of the heart in all its power and simplicity. - Pg. xxiv - Foreword To Fourth Edition
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Slogans seem silly but they are important tools: first things first; one day at a time; kiss. We say them frequently because we need to burn them into our thoughts. Slogans are not 'fillers' for reluctant speakers. They embody important principles necessary to our path of recovery.
With the next slogan I hear, let me really HEAR it, know its importance, and practice it.
Treasures
If I am alive then I need to look around me and feel thankful for the gifts that are mine. There is so much to be grateful for if I am willing to consider the blessings I already have. There is a wisdom in gratitude because what I focus on with appreciation has a way of expanding in my life. If I erase my blessings, I don't feed them with the grace of gratitude. If I give thanks for them, I show the creative force that brings forth all good things that I am worthy enough to appreciate what has been so generously given to me.
I know enough to say thank you
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You are either progressing or regressing. There is no such thing as standing still; there is no such thing as simply 'gressing.'
I can only coast one way, and that's downhill.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Sobriety is never an accident.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
As I let go of all the negative tapes that block my truth, I trust and follow the energy that leads me to peace and joy.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Willpower tells me I must. Willingness tells me I can. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 12, 2017 0:13:25 GMT -5
February 13
Daily Reflections
WE CAN'T THINK OUR WAY SOBER
To the intellectually self-sufficient man or woman, many A.A.'s can say, "Yes, we were like you--far too smart for our own good.... Secretly, we felt we could float above the rest of the folks on our brain power alone." AS BILL SEES IT, p. 60
Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the disease of alcoholism. I can't think my way sober. I try to remember that intelligence is a God-given attribute that I may use, a joy--like having a talent for dancing or drawing or carpentry. It does not make me better than anyone else, and it is not a particularly reliable tool for recovery, for it is a power greater than myself who will restore me to sanity--not a high IQ or a college degree.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Sometimes we can't help thinking: Why can't we ever drink again? We know it's because we're alcoholics, but why did we have to get that way? The answer is that at some point in our drinking careers, we passed what is called our "tolerance point." When we passed this point, we passed from a condition in which we could tolerate alcohol to a condition in which we could not tolerate it at all. After that, if we took one drink we would sooner or later end up drunk. When I think of liquor now, do I think of it as something that I can never tolerate again?
Meditation For The Day
In a race, it is when a goal is in sight that heart and nerves and muscles and courage are strained almost to the breaking point. So with us. The goal of the spiritual life is in sight. All we need is the final effort. The saddest records made by people are those who ran well, with brave stout hearts, until the sight of the goal and then some weakness or self-indulgence held them back. They never knew how near the goal they were or how near they were to victory.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may press on until the goal is reached. I pray that I may not give up in the final stretch.
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As Bill Sees It
Daily Acceptance, p. 44
"Too much of my life has been spent in dwelling upon the faults of others. This is a most subtle and perverse form of self-satisfaction, which permits us to remain comfortably unaware of our own defects. Too often we are heard to say, 'If it weren't for him (or her), how happy I'd be!"
<< << << >> >> >>
Our very first problem is to accept our present circumstances as they are, ourselves as we are, and the people about us as they are. This is to adopt a realistic humility without which no genuine advance can even begin. Again and again, we shall need to return to that unflattering point of departure. This is an exercise in acceptance that we can profitably practice every day of our lives.
Provided we strenuously avoid turning these realistic surveys of the facts of life into unrealistic alibis for apathy or defeatism, they can be the sure foundation upon which increased emotional heath and therefore spiritual progress can be built.
1. Letter, 1966 2. Grapevine, March 1962
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Walk In Dry Places
When Others Don't perform____Personal Responsibility There will be times when other people will disappoint us.. either intentionally or because of indifference or incompetence. If we have been counting on them, their nonperformance can cause us real anger and frustration. Our growth, however, should teach us that such failures are part of life. While never losing trust in others, we must accept them as fallible people. Their mistakes and lapses come from the human shortcomings all of us have. Our best course is to live without expecting too much from others. They are not here to please or satisfy us. It's possible, too, that we've been unrealistic in some of our expectations and have set ourselves up for disappointments. Our personal responsibility is to do our best even when others fall short of our expectations. At the same time, we can grow by becoming more reliable and dependable ourselves. We cannot use another's failure as an excuse for negligence on our part. Today I'll expect the best, but I will know that I also have the spiritual resources to deal with the worst that can happen.
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Keep It Simple
Tomorrow doesn't matter, for I have lived today. --Horace Life is found in the present. One of the first things we hear when we enter the program is, One Day at a Time. We break life into short time periods. This give us the power to change. We're not sure we can stay sober for a lifetime. But we know that with God, and our program, we can stay sober for today. This holds true for many other things in out lives. We're not sure we can go a lifetime without feeling self-pity, but we can give it up for a day. By living One Day at a Time, we become more sure of our strength. We have the power to change things only in the present. The present holds much for us, if we get a hold on it. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You are found in the moment. You are here. I will stay with You minute by minute. Action for the Day: I will ground myself in the present. Today, I'll not worry about the past or the future.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I have sacrificed everything in my life that I consider precious in order to advance the political career of my husband. --Pat Nixon Putting another person's needs first is what most of us were trained to do when growing up. We were seldom encouraged to embark on an individual course, and years of taking a back seat taught us that our hopes mattered little. Now, for some of us, the future looks like a blank wall. It is time to carve out a plan for ourselves, yet how do we decide where we want to go? And how do we get there? The program says, "Live one day at a time." Our friends say, "Take one step at a time." We have chosen to do something about the circumstances we found ourselves in, or we wouldn't be reading these words. We can stop for a moment and reflect on the many changes thus far. We are already on our way. We have taken a number of necessary steps. What an exciting adventure we have embarked upon! And we will be helped all along the way. We can trust our inner yearnings, the ones we may have stifled in times past. We can realize our hearts' pure desires, if we seek guidance. My time has come. I can mold my future. I will take each day, each experience, and let it draw me to the next important step.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
These are some of the questions which race through the mind of every woman who has an alcoholic husband. We hope this book has answered some of them. Perhaps your husband has been living in that strange world of alcoholism where everything is distorted and exaggerated. You can see that he really does love with his better self. Of course, there is such a thing as incompatibility, but in nearly every instance the alcoholic only seems to be unloving and inconsiderate; it is usually because he is warped and sickened that he says and does these appalling things. Today most of our men are better husbands and fathers than ever before.
p. 108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
No longer the party animal, I was broke and my rent was overdue. I had dirty dishes piled in the sink and moldy pots on the stove. Bags of garbage and bottles were lined up by the door and the toilet had stopped. Piles of stolen junk were sitting on the floor. I had been wearing my clothes much too long and, except for a box of macaroni and cheese or a pot pie, I was not eating. When a knock came at the door, I would run into the bathroom and peep out the window to see who was coming to get me. Not drinking wasn't an option, but drinking didn't help. Such was my condition as I left the house to check myself into the hospital for my day of reckoning.
p. 507
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Not long after the man with the double stigma knocked for admission, A.A.'s other group received into its membership a salesman we shall call Ed. A power driver, this one, and brash as any salesman could possibly be. He had at least and idea a minute on how to improves A.A. These ideas he sold to fellow members with the same burning enthusiasm with which he distributed automobile polish. But he had one idea that wasn't so salable. Ed was an atheist. His pet obsession was that A.A. could get along better without its "God nonsense." He browbeat everybody, and everybody expected that he'd soon get drunk - for at the time, you see, A.A. was on the pious side. There must be a heavy penalty, it was thought, for blasphemy. Distressingly enough, Ed proceeded to stay sober.
p. 143
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"Letting go of the past and not worrying about the future seems a small price to pay for all the happiness to be found in the present."
The richest man, whatever his lot, is he who is content with what he has got. --Dutch Proverb
If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else. --Booker T. Washington
God help me relax and let my answer about what to do next come naturally from you. --Melody Beattie
We are loved completely by a God who knows us completely. --Pedro A. Sandin-Fremaint
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
REALITY
"It is the chiefest point of happiness that man is willing to be what he is." -- Desiderious Erasmus
I am an alcoholic. Today I am able to love myself because I am able to accept myself.
More than this: because I am able to accept myself, I am able to be myself. The acceptance of my disease around alcohol has taught me that I am not perfect, and I do not live in a perfect world --- this leads to an acceptance of others. My pain around alcohol has given me an insight into the sufferings of others --- and this has produced spiritual growth.
I am happy not because I am an alcoholic but because I know that I am an alcoholic. Today I can be what I was meant to be, rather than the "fake" that I was becoming.
In the spiritual journey is the happiness.
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"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28
'Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.' Matthew 11:28
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Daily Inspiration
Leave behind your faults and know that your past is forgiven. Lord, You have freed me to live today and allowed me to know that my future is secure in You.
Live a God-filled life and it will be only natural that you will express enthusiasm for life, joy, laughter and happiness. Lord, may the way I live always express my love for You.
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NA Just For Today
The Ties That Bind
"As long as the ties that bind us together are stronger than those that would tear us apart, all will be well." Basic Text, p. 57
Many of us feel that without NA we would surely have died from our disease. Hence, its existence is our very lifeline. However, disunity is an occasional fact of life in Narcotics Anonymous; we must learn to respond in a constructive way to the destructive influences that sometimes arise in our fellowship. If we decide to be part of the solution instead of the problem, we are headed in the right direction.
Our personal recovery and the growth of NA is contingent upon maintaining an atmosphere of recovery in our meetings. Are we willing to help our group deal constructively with conflict? As group members, do we strive to work out difficulties openly, honestly, and fairly? Do we seek to promote the common welfare of all our members rather than our own agenda? And, as trusted servants, do we take into consideration the effect our actions might have on newcomers?
Service can bring out both the best and the worst in us. But it is often through service that we begin to get in touch with some of our more pressing defects of character Do we shrink from service commitments rather than face what we might find out about ourselves? If we bear in mind the strength of the ties that bind us together—our recovery from active addiction—all will be well.
Just for today: I will strive to be of service to our fellowship. I will be unafraid to discover who I am.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Oh, a trouble's a ton, or a trouble's an ounce, Or a trouble is what you make it, And it isn't the fact that you're hurt that counts, But only how you take it. --Edmund Vance Cooke Once, a woman decided to throw a problem-exchange party. As guests arrived, they shed all their personal problems and tossed them onto a pile with everyone else's. After all had discussed their own problem for others to hear, the party ended with guests selecting from the problem pile those they wished to carry away. Each person left with the same troubles he or she had brought to the party. We who worry a great deal about our problems are always sure no one else has troubles as bad as ours. Too often, we complain, "If you had my problems, you'd really hurt." Our problems are tailored to us, and geared to help us learn by solving them. No one else's would be quite right. When we cope with problems, rather than wailing about them, we discover that our own are minor irritations compared to those we see in others. What problems am I lucky to have?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to the light I have. --Abraham Lincoln With too much focus on control, we men have been preoccupied by our overemphasis on outcomes. We say winning is everything, and the way we play the game doesn't matter. We give honor to a man who has accumulated great wealth, regardless of how he has lived. We develop sexual problems because we focus on performance and achieving orgasm rather than on the joy of loving. As our integrity grows, our emphasis changes. It is not crucial that we always be right, only that we be honest. We do not have to be winners or high achievers so much as we have to be real human beings. Conquest is not as important as connection. We do not always have to compare ourselves and be better than the next guy. We can exchange and appreciate the communication. Today, I will grow in my relationships with others by being more true to myself and less driven toward a particular outcome.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Letting Go of Those Not in Recovery We can go forward with our life and recoveries, even though someone we love is not yet recovering. Picture a bridge. On one side of the bridge it is cold and dark. We stood there with others in the cold and darkness, doubled over in pain. Some of us developed an eating disorder to cope with the pain. Some drank; some used other drugs. Some of us lost control of our sexual behavior. Some of us obsessively focused on addicted people's pain to distract us from our own pain. Many of us did both: we developed an addictive behavior, and distracted ourselves by focusing on other addicted people. We did not know there was a bridge. We thought we were trapped on a cliff. Then, some of us got lucky. Our eyes opened, by the Grace of God, because it was time. We saw the bridge. People told us what was on the other side: warmth, light, and healing from our pain. We could barely glimpse or imagine this, but we decided to start the trek across the bridge anyway. We tried to convince the people around us on the cliff that there was a bridge to a better place, but they wouldn't listen. They couldn't see it; they couldn't believe. They were not ready for the journey. We decided to go alone, because we believed, and because people on the other side were cheering us onward. The closer we got to the other side, the more we could see, and feel, that what we had been promised was real. There was light, warmth, healing, and love. The other side was a better place. But now, there is a bridge between those on the other side and us. Sometimes, we may be tempted to go back and drag them over with us, but it cannot be done. No one can be dragged or forced across this bridge. Each person must go at his or her own choice, when the time is right. Some will come; some will stay on the other side. The choice is not ours. We can love them. We can wave to them. We can holler back and forth. We can cheer them on, as others have cheered and encouraged us. But we cannot make them come over with us. If our time has come to cross the bridge, or if we have already crossed and are standing in the light and warmth, we do not have to feel guilty. It is where we are meant to be. We do not have to go back to the dark cliff because another's time has not yet come. The best thing we can do is stay in the light, because it reassures others that there is a better place. And if others ever do decide to cross the bridge, we will be there to cheer them on. Today, I will move forward with my life, despite what others are doing or not doing. I will know it is my right to cross the bridge to a better life, even if I must leave others behind to do that. I will not feel guilty. I will not feel ashamed. I know that where I am now is a better place and where I'm meant to be.
As I let go of all the negative tapes that block my truth, I trust and follow the energy that leads me to peace and joy. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Don’t Let People Put Thoughts in Your Head
Respect the power of words and thoughts, both your own and others’.
Our ideas and inspirations sometimes come from other people, come from outside us. But if we’re not careful, it’s easy for others to put their ideas and intentions into our minds, to cast their spells on us. You aren’t very creative. Your heart isn’t open. You’re really not that healthy. You need me to succeed. You don’t deserve success. In fact, you don’t deserve… How easy it is to be unaware of the process, to walk around with other people’s words in your head, taking them as truth, taking them as our own, letting their ideas about us control our lives and our beliefs.
We don’t have to let others put their spells on us. We don’t have to believe what they say.
What are the words others have spoken to you, the spells they’ve cast on you and your life? What phrases are echoing in your mind, and who do they belong to? Listen to what you hear, and if they are not yours, get them out.
Words are powerful. Don’t let other people put them in your head. And choose carefully the words you speak to them.
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More Language Of Letting Go
You’re not alone
I felt a searing pain in my heart. It was physical– I swear it was– when that nurse asked me if I had someone I could call. Over the next few days at the hospital, I was surrounded by people, but at no previous time in my life had I ever felt this isolated and alone. I knew that the path I was about to walk, I had to walk alone.
Larer, another nurse walked over to me. She looked straight into my eyes. “It’s going to be difficult, harder than you can imagine,” she said. “And it’ll take about eight years. But you can do it. You’ll come through. I know. I lost a child,too. My daughter was nine when she died.”
There are places in our lives that we’re called to go alone. People can surround us, call us, and offer support. But the journey we’re about to take is solely and uniquely ours. People can watch us, reach out to us, and even say they know how it feels. But the world we’re entering is ours, and ours alone.
Slowly, as we walk this path that life has thrust on us, we begin to see the outline of a few faces– way out in the distance, waving to us, cheering us on. As we continue along the path, the faces and forms fill in. Before long, we see that we’re in the midst of a large, large group. Where did all these people come from? we wonder. I thought I was alone.
No matter what path you’re on, others have walked it before you, and some will follow you there. Each step you take is uniquely yours, but you are never, never alone.
While many experiences are isolated and uniquely ours, we’re simultaneously part of a collecive force. What we go through and what we do matters– sometimes much more than we know.
God, help me know how much you care. No matter what I’m going through, help me see the other faces along the way.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We sometimes hear someone say, “He is standing in his own light,” A mental picture then clearly reveals that many of us tend to shadow our own happiness by mistaken thinking. Let us learn to stand aside so the light can shine on us and all we do. For only then can we see ourselves and our circumstances with true clarity With The Program and the Twelves Steps, we no longer need to stand in our own light and try alone to solve our problems in dearness. When I am faced with a seemingly insoluble problem, will I ask myself if I am standing in my own light?
Today I Pray
May I not get in my own way, obscure my own clarity of thought, stumble over my own feet, block my own doorway to recovery. If I find that I am standing in my own light, may I ask my Higher Power and my friends in the group to show me a new vantage point.
Today I Will Remember
If all I an see is my shadow, I’m in my own light.
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One More Day
Joy waits for no man. –Tanhuma
Joyfulness is one of God’s greatest gifts. Joy transcends all time and place. Joy causes unmeasurable and often indescribable feelings which we might only have for a fleeting moment. Joy is like opening a special present. It is a state of mind, a frame of reference for future memories.
While we may quite easily recognize the joy of watching an exquisite sunset, we forget too often that it is natural that its beauty changes, dims, and then disappears within moments. And this is true of many of our joy-filled experiences — they change, they dim, and often they disappear. Joy does not always stay with us, so we need to make the most of it when it is upon us — in a sunset, child’s hug, or a friend’s offered hand.
To live life to the fullest, I am open to those special moments of joy, even if they don’t last forever.
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One Day At A Time
ADMITTING MISTAKES
"A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday." Alexander Pope
Most of my life I had spent in blaming others for all the bad things that happened in my life, and I never learned to take responsibilty for my part in anything. I thought that life had treated me unfairly, but mostly it was because someone else had wronged me. I wallowed in self pity and justifiable anger, and not surprisingly, I found comfort in food so I could get through the pain of being treated so badly by others.
When I came into the program and began working the steps, I was horrified to learn that I was expected to do a searching and fearless inventory of my wrongdoings, for after all wasn't it others who had harmed me and not the other way around? Slowly I realised that I had a part to play in all the events in my life, and that only by clearing up the wreckage of my past and keeping my side of the street clean, did I have any hope of recovery. I had to swallow my pride and admit when I was wrong, and when I did that, miracles began to happen. Instead of feeling hard done by and bad about myself as I had thought I would, the exact opposite happened, and I started on a journey of growth and increasing self esteem that never ceases to surprise me. When I am able to admit that I'm wrong and apologise for my part in any conflict or misunderstanding, without expectation of anything back from the other person, I strengthen my recovery in this program.
One day at a time ... I will admit my mistakes whether I believe that the fault is mine or not, because that is the way that I grow in my recovery. Sharon
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn't work. - Pg. 62 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Life is not fair. You see it in the headlines; you see it in people racked with chronic pain; you see it in senseless street violence and children starving in third world countries. It will be a challenge for you in the coming weeks to understand it is not an unfair thing that has just happened, addiction and then recovery, but the greatest fight you shall ever receive.
Creator, I do not know why good people suffer addiction. For if it is the very act of not understanding and still trusting in the good of the universe, that comprises the very essence of faith.
Silver Linings
I search for silver linings, for the deeper meaning of events in my life. I will look for the lesson. When life offers up its inevitable challenges, I will try to understand what I am meant to see that I am not seeing, what I am meant to hear that I am not hearing. There is always a silver lining if I look for it. Even if I don't see it readily, I trust that it is there and that it will reveal itself to me over time. Life isn't simple. One of the ways that I can have a better experience is to see what is positive, about a given situation, to look for the silver lining. I can grow in joy and in pain. It doesn't need to be one or the other because pain can transform into joy. It can be the fire that clears the the field for new and tender growth.
There is always a silver lining
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
As a general rule, questions that ask 'why' go in the wrong direction, seeking explanations that blame and shame. Questions that begin with 'How' and 'What' as in 'How do I start my Fourth?' and 'What can I learn from this?' lead to solutions, where the light bulb goes on in your head.
I ask questions that lead to exclamations not explanations.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Acceptance: Life is 10% what you make it and 90% how you take it
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today my faith and confidence grow as I learn to accept all that I discover without judgment. I feel energy and life flow through me with this new freedom.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Alcohol is a great remover. It removes stains, inhibitions, worries, jobs, families, freedom, choices, dignity, livers, - and lives. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 13, 2017 23:23:23 GMT -5
February 14
Daily Reflections
EXPECTATIONS vs. DEMANDS
Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 98
Dealing with expectations is a frequent topic at meetings. It isn't wrong to expect progress of myself, good things from life, or decent treatment from others. Where I get into trouble is when my expectations become demands. I will fall short of what I wish to be and situations will go in ways I do not like, because people will let me down sometimes. The only question is: "What am I going to about it?" Wallow in self-pity or anger; retaliate and make a bad situation worse; or will I trust in God's power to bring blessings on the messes in which I find myself? Will I ask Him what I should be learning; do I keep on doing the right things I know how to do, no matter what; do I take the time to share my faith and blessings with others?
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
After that first drink, we had a single track mind. It was like a railroad train. The first drink started it off and it kept going on the single track until it got to the end of the line, drunkenness. We knew this would happen when we sat down at a bar to have the first drink, but still we couldn't keep away from liquor. Our will-power was gone. We had become helpless and hopeless before the power of alcohol. It's not the second drink or the tenth drink that does the damage. It's the first drink. Will I ever take that first drink again?
Meditation For The Day
I must keep a time apart with God every day. Gradually I will be transformed mentally and spiritually. It is not the praying so much as just being in God's presence. The strengthening and curative powers of this I cannot understand, but I can experience them. The poor, sick world would be cured if every day each soul waited before God for the inspiration to live aright. My greatest spiritual growth occurs in this time apart with God.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may faithfully keep a quiet time apart with God. I pray that I may grow spiritually each day.
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As Bill Sees It
Our Companions, p. 45
Today, the vast majority of us welcome any new light that can be thrown on the alcoholic's mysterious and baffling malady. We welcome new and valuable knowledge whether it is issues from a test tube, from a psychiatrist's couch, or from revealing social studies. We are glad of any kind of education that accurately informs the public and changes its age-old attitude toward the drunk.
More and more we regard all who labor in the total field of alcoholism as our companions on a march from darkness into light. We see that we can accomplish together what we could never accomplish in separation and in rivalry.
Grapevine, March 1958
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Walk In Dry Places
Releasing the Past_____ Living in the Present. Some of us waste time brooding over past failures and lost opportunities. Since the past is beyond our reach, we can't change anything that happened. We do, however, have the power to change the way we view the present. We can begin by realizing that our past troubles really may have been valuable lessons. We can also get a better perspective by releasing the idea that anything from the past controls our future. The real meaning of the saying "with God, all things are possible" is that our Higher Power can transform anything that happened in our past. AA has had its share of miraculous changes that came to people who seemingly had lost all hope. These changes have included miraculous restorations in health, finances, and relationships. A new saying is that something or some person who bothered us in the past is history, as far as we're concerned. Let's put history where it belongs__ on the shelves and away from our daily thinking and activities. I can be a new person today and every day. The past cannot control or limit me, but I do benefit from its lessons.
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Keep It Simple
Some things have to be believed to be seen. --Ralph Hodgson In recovery, we learn to trust. We trust that our Higher Power is on our side. Maybe we can't see our Higher Power , but once we start trusting things change. Step Two says, "Came to believe. . . " Once we come to believe, we start to see our Higher Power working in many ways. We make new program friends. We find new peace. Our family and friends trust us again. Life won't always be fair. We won't get all we want. But we'll find the love and care we need. If we're open to believing in love, the easy times will be easier and the harder times a bit softer. Do I believe in love? Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me believe, especially when times are hard. Help me not blame You for the hard times. Action for the Day: I will write what I believe the program and my Higher Power want for me.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Friendship of a kind that cannot easily be reversed tomorrow must have its roots in common interests and shared beliefs. --Barbara W. Tuchman The gift of friendship has been extended to each of us sharing this program. Our interest is common: we want to stay abstinent. And we share the belief that a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. We trust our commitment to one another here. We are learning to live the program's principles in all our affairs. In years gone by, friendships were often missing from our lives. We had a friend, here and there, certainly, but could she really be trusted - with our secrets, with our spouse? An overriding fear and one not without reason. It's likely that we, too, failed to be good friends. Friendship, anytime, means risking vulnerability. It means making a decision to be trustworthy. And it means not backing away from either, anytime. Friendships so enrich our lives; they complete us. The experiences shared among friends give us all an edge on living. It is no accident that we have been drawn here together. What we have will help another. I must be willing to give away my intimate self to my sisters in trust. My strength as a woman recovering will increase as my ties of friendship increase.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Try not to condemn your alcoholic husband no matter what he says or does. He is just another very sick, unreasonable person. Treat him, when you can, as though he had pneumonia. When he angers you, remember that he is very ill.
p. 108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
Outside of being very nervous, I don't remember much about admissions because I was so loaded at the time. After a few hours I began to feel safer. My apprehension slowly turned to relief. Maybe they could help me after all. I had no idea how sick I was to become. The first five of my seventeen days in detox were hell. I could do little more than lie in bed. It had been years since I was sober that long. After a week I felt a little better and began surveying my surroundings. I started my own counter-evaluations. I found the doctors and nurses to be knowledgeable and professional, but I sensed that while they knew much about alcoholism, they had learned it in books--they had not lived it. I did not need knowledge. I needed solutions. No one but the hopeless really knew what it felt like to exist without hope. The skeptic in me came out, searching for every loophole and excuse to pick things apart and to divert attention from my condition. My initial optimism was beginning to waver. Was this all there was?
pp. 507-508
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
At length the time came for him to speak in a meeting. We shivered, for we knew what was coming. He paid a fine tribute to the Fellowship; he told how his family had been reunited; he extolled the virtue of honesty; he recalled the joys of Twelfth Step work; and then he lowered the boom. Cried Ed, "I can't stand this God stuff! It's a lot of malarkey for weak folks. This group doesn't need it, and I won't have it! To he!! with it!" A great wave of outraged resentment engulfed the meeting, sweeping every member to a single resolve: "Out he goes!"
p. 143
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If you keep falling in the same hole, go down a different road.
It is not easy to straighten in the oak the crook that grew in the sapling. --American Proverb
"Silence is one of the hardest things to refute." --Josh Billings
Little deeds of kindness, little words of love, help to make earth happy like the heaven above. --Julia A. Fletcher Carney
Faith is not only a belief and a feeling, it is an action. Action, really does speak louder than words. --Shelley
Let us dedicate ourselves to peace within ourselves, that wherever we go, we bring peace and we learn to find peace in all things. --John Morton
God treasures each of us as a rare and lovely flower. --Patricia Bellah
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LOVE
"Let there be spaces in your togetherness." -- Kahlil Gibran
As an alcoholic I demanded love and was possessive of others. I had a selfish love that treated people as "things" --- for my own satisfaction and survival. I was claustrophobic in my affection and smothered any creative love; my fear of being alone made me blackmail people with my needs and emotions.
Today I can love people while still allowing them to breathe. An important part of my program is detachment; I take responsibility for me and I allow others to take responsibility for themselves. I give the people I love space.
Sometimes I need to love a person enough to let them go. Spiritually I am beginning to understand that in order to be free, I must give freedom to others.
God, in the "spaces" of my love is the growth experienced.
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Praise God in His sanctuary; praise Him in the mighty heavens. Psalm 150:1
"Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles." Isaiah 40:31
See what love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and that is what we are. 1 John 3:1
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Daily Inspiration
Don't ever grow too old for your birthdays or give up on your dreams. Lord, help me to know where You are leading me today and face this adventure with excitement.
Never let what you can't do get in the way of what you can do. Lord, help me to recognize my abilities and focus only on my strengths so that each day I will get nearer to my goals.
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NA Just For Today
Honesty And Spirituality
"The right to a God of your understanding is total and without any catches. Because we have this right, it is necessary to be honest about our belief if we are to grow spiritually"
Basic Text, p. 25
In meetings, over refreshments, in talks with our sponsor, we hear our NA friends talking about the way they understand their Higher Power. It would be easy to "go with the flow;" adopting someone else's beliefs. But just as no one else can recover for us, so no one else's spirituality can substitute for our own. We must honestly search for an understanding of God that truly works for us.
Many of us begin that search with prayer and meditation, and continue with our experiences in recovery. Have there been instances where we have been given power beyond our own to face life's challenges? When we have quietly sought direction in times of trouble, have we found it? What kind of Power do we believe has guided and strengthened us? What kind of Power do we seek? With the answers to these questions, we will understand our Higher Power well enough to feel safe and confident about asking it to care for our will and lives.
A borrowed understanding of God may do on a short haul. But in the long run, we must come to our own understanding of a Higher Power, for it is that Power which will carry us through our recovery.
Just for today: I seek a Power greater than myself that can help me grow spiritually. Today, I will examine my beliefs honestly and come to my own understanding of God.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Love cures people--both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it. --Karl Menninger Receiving a loving hug from a parent or perhaps a smile from a friend or even a stranger gives us a special feeling inside. We know we are important to others when they show us their love through attention. And we sometimes forget that we matter to others. Family members and friends feel good in the same way when we show them our love. Everyone needs to be loved. How can we show our love? Must it be through a hug? Doing a favor for someone is loving. Helping around the house or the yard is loving, particularly when we've volunteered our help. Giving an unexpected gift to a friend is a way of showing love. Showing others we care, even when they are angry, is perhaps the nicest of all expressions of love. What new way can I show someone I care today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. The less able I am to believe in our epoch and the more arid and depraved mankind seems in my eyes, the less I look to revolution as the remedy and the more I believe in the magic of love. --Hermann Hesse Men have been more likely to look outward than inward for solutions to problems. Yet this program is changing us from within. As we come to terms with ourselves, as we learn to be in relationships with friends and family, the same picture that looked so dismal in past years may look full of possibilities and even rich in the present. The love we feel toward others and the love we receive change our perceptions. We need not expect all relationships to be alike. One friend may be wonderful as a recreational buddy, but perhaps we wouldn't talk about everything in our life with him. Another friend is comfortable and we can be ourselves with him, although he may not challenge us to grow or change. No friendship, no spouse, no one person can be enough in our life. But as a group they sustain and enrich us. We need the love and contact with them all. I am thankful for love, which gives meaning and hope to life.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Valentine's Day For children, Valentine's Day means candy hearts, silly cards, and excitement in the air. How different Valentine's Day can be for us as adults. The Love Day can be a symbol that we have not yet gotten love to work for us as we would like. Or it can be a symbol of something different, something better. We are in recovery now. We have begun the healing process. Our most painful relationships, we have learned, have assisted us on the journey to healing, even if they did little more than point out our own issues or show us what we don't want in our life. We have started the journey of learning to love ourselves. We have started the process of opening our heart to love, real love that flows from us, to others, and back again. Do something loving for yourself. Do something loving and fun for your friends, for your children, or for anyone you choose. It is the Love Day. Wherever we are in our healing process, we can have as much fun with it as we choose. Whatever our circumstances, we can be grateful that our heart is opening to love. I will open myself to the love available to me from people, the Universe, and my Higher Power today. I will allow myself to give and receive the love I want today. I am grateful that my heart is healing, that I am learning to love.
I am beginning to actually feel the energy of love that I have inside. My entire being is in the process of being transformed with love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Send Love Letters
Sending love letters to people we care about is a rewarding experience, both for us and for them. Making the time to take pen in hand and express our thoughts is valuable. But there’s another way to send love letters,too. This way takes as much time and attention as writing a loving note does, but it doesn’t require a pen and paper. It requires concentrated thought.
There’s an invisible thread of energy winding through the universe, one that connects us all. Have you ever noticed that sometimes you can tell if someone’s angry or upset with you, even if you haven’t talked to or seen this person? You can feel his or her anger, even if you haven’t been physically present to experience it. Thoughts have power, particularly those charged with intense emotional energy. When we think mean, bitter thoughts, it can be like sending hate mail along our connecting wires. It can almost be a sensory attack.
Why not send loving thoughts charged with positive emotional energy? We can consciously choose to use our connections to others to send love. Send positive thoughts. Blessings. Peace. Assistance in time of crisis. We can send our thoughts in the form of a prayer, or we can simply think a blessing or positive thought, charge it with energy, and send it along the wires with love.
When someone you know or love comes to mind, or even someone you don’t– perhaps someone in another part of the country or the world, perhaps someone going through a particular crisis– and you’re not certain what to do, send a love letter. Your loving thoughts will touch them and your blessings will all come back to you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say woohoo because there’s hope
The doorbell rang one day. I was slumping about in the big house I had just purchased in Minnesota. It was going to be the dream home for the children and me. The problem was, Shane had been killed the day after I closed the deal. Now Nichole and I were rambling around wondering what to do.
I answered the door. The FedEx man asked me to sign for a delivery. I did. And he handed me a large cardboard box. I brought it into the living room and put it down without opening it up. I didn’t get excited about much of anything back then. I was sad and angry. People, my readers, said they liked my writing because it gave them hope. The problem was, I didn’t have any of that hope for myself. I couldn’t see how life could or would ever make any kind of sense again. The one thing I wanted– my son alive and well, and my family intact– would not ever come to pass.
One day I got around to opening that big cardboard box. I took a knife, sliced it down the center, and looked at what was inside. It was filled with stuffed animals. A big green parrot with a fuzzy beak was sitting on top. There were monkeys, bears, and assorted things. They didn’t look brand new, but they were happy, cheerful little things. I took out the card and read the note inside. This is what it said.
“I make my living out of taking all the stuffed animals that people throw away. Then I take them home and clean them up. I guess I like doing it just to prove a point,” the woman wrote. “Sometimes, we start thinking something’s no good anymore, so we throw it in the trash. Sometimes we throw things away too quickly, but all they really need is a little tender, loving care to bring them back to life. I heard about your son’s death. I thought maybe getting a box of my reborn animals might help.”
Many years have passed since then. I’ve gotten rid of a lot of my possessions, especially when I moved from Minnesota to California in 1994. But one of the things I’ve held on to– in fact he’s still sitting in this room with me next to my desk– is that happy green parrot with the big fuzzy beak.
He’s a gentle reminder that even something as broken and scaggly as I was can be brought back to life again. Some things in life are true, whether we believe them or not.
Hope is one of those things.
Even if you have to say it in disbelief, say woohoo.
God, help me believe in me as much as you do. Thanks for getting me through those tough spots when I lose my faith.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Today I will take the time to list the positive aspects of my new life and the blessings that accompany the miracle of my recovery. I will be grateful for the seemingly simple ability to eat normally, to fall asleep with a feeling of contentment, to awaken with a gladness to be alive. I will be grateful for the ability to face life on life’s terms — with peace of mind, self-respect, and full possession of all my faculties. On a daily basis, do I count my blessings? Do I seek through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God as I understand Him?
Today I Pray
On this day of love-giving,may I count all the good things in my life and give thanks for them. May I take no blessing for granted, including the beating of my own heart and the fresh feel of new air as I breathe.
Today I Will Remember
To count — and consider — my blessings.
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We don’t love qualities, we love persons..
.–Jacques Maritain
No matter what happens to us in our lifetime, regardless of whether we are rich or poor,m strong or weak, ill or well, we always have room for love. Unqualified love and caring cost nothing. Despite our financial position, allowing ourselves to love, allowing ourselves to be loved strengthens and lends greater value to our lives.
In loving others and in being loved, we’re reminded that people, not events or even characteristics, are th important elements of our lives. We don’t look for perfection in our loved ones, and we’re freed of the notion that we must earn another’s love. Love balances our lives; it helps us keep sight of our values and priorities.
I will remember today that I love people for themselves, not for their potential. The love I receive is given just as freely.
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One Day At A Time
OZ
"Oz never did give nothing to the Tin Man That he didn't, didn't already have." Tin Man Written by Dewey Bunnell, ©1974
These are simple words, and at first glance look like a song from the 'Wizard of Oz.’ However, to me they are complex and have deep meaning.
I have a body, a mind and a spirit; yet for the better part of my growing-up years I thought I had a flaw. I never felt complete and kept searching for whatever-it-was that would make me whole and fix me. I had no idea I was looking in the wrong places; but the real problem was I didn't know what I was looking for.
I never knew how to just 'be' without expecting some kind of negative feedback or teasing or criticism or uncertainty in return. Because I never felt good enough, I learned to 'not be' and to make myself invisible emotionally while eating, and in later years eating and purging.
Coming to OA was like surfacing for air after staying under water too long. People who didn’t know me understood and supported me. I slowly opened up and shared at meetings and did service and stopped hiding, and the void created with food and loneliness began to fill with hugs and support and recovery.
Today I have a Program with wonderful friends who reinforce I am OK as I am. God gave me and continues to give me what I need - physically (help with my food plan), emotionally and spiritually. The miracles in my life keep coming when I least expect them and only when I turn them over to God. Each new miracle and blessing nourishes me.
I began writing professionally again; writing is my passion, and my disease stole it from me. My spirit is happy, and I am grateful to my loving friend who had confidence and faith in me.
One day at a time ... I am discovering my emerging identity was inside me all the time. Janie
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience and entire psychic change there is little hope of his recovery. - Pg. XXIX - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Under stress men are more likely to do the 'fight or flight' thing and counter stress with anger or desertion. Women are more likely to adopt the 'tend and befriend' mode where they begin to nurture others and make alliances. You will be adopting a number of strategies in your growing recovery. Try to make as many of them proactive as you can. The more you respond ( with thought and deliberation ) then react ( instinctively ), the better you will weather the journey.
I seek solutions and guidelines for my behaviors and the coming decisions I must make. I do not 'react' but 'respond' to the situations in my life.
The Power is in the Now
I recognize that the present is alive and vibrant and creative. All of the creative power of this alive and radiant universe is in the present, in the here and now. If I align myself with the present, if I allow myself to fully experience this moment, I will find all I need in it. There is magic in this moment, there is beauty and vibrancy in it that resonates throughout my life. What I experience now, creates my future.
There is nothing like the present
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Sometimes you are the wind; sometimes you are the bug; sometimes you are the windshield.
Experience is what I get when I don't get what I want.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
When we use, addiction makes all our decisions.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am beginning to actually feel the energy of love that I have inside. My entire being is in the process of being transformed with love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Don't point the finger, reach out the hand. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 15, 2017 17:39:35 GMT -5
February 15
Daily Reflections
TAKING ACTION
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us--sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84
One of the most important things A.A. has given me, in addition to freedom from booze, is the ability to take "right action." It says the promises will ALWAYS materialize if I WORK for them. Fantasizing about them, debating them, preaching about them and faking them just won't work. I'll remain a miserable, rationalizing dry drunk. By taking action and working the Twelve Steps in all my affairs, I'll have a life beyond my wildest dreams.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
If alcoholism were just a physical allergy, like asthma or hay fever, it would be easy for us, by taking a skin test with alcohol, to find out whether or not we're alcoholics. But alcoholism is not just a physical allergy. It's also a mental allergy or obsession. After we've become alcoholics, we can still tolerate alcohol physically for quite a while, although we suffer a little more after each binge and each time it takes a little longer to get over our hangovers. Do I realize that since I have become an alcoholic, I cannot tolerate alcohol mentally at all?
Meditation For The Day
The world does not need super-men or women, but super-natural people. People who will persistently turn the self out of their lives and let Divine Power work through them. Let inspiration take the place of aspiration. Seek to grow spiritually, rather than to acquire fame and riches. Our chief ambition should be to be used by God. The Divine Force is sufficient for all the spiritual work in the world. God only needs the instruments for His use. His instruments can remake the world.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be an instrument of the Divine Power. I pray that I may do my share in remaking the world.
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As Bill Sees It
True Ambition--and False, p. 46
We have had a much keener look at ourselves and those about us. We have seen that we were prodded by unreasonable fears or anxieties into making a life business of winning fame, money, and what we thought was leadership. So false pride became the reverse side of that ruinous coin marked "Fear." We simply had to be Number One people to cover up our deep-lying inferiorities.
<< << << >> >> >>
True ambition is not what we thought it was. True ambition is the profound desire to live usefully and walk humbly under the grace of God.
12 & 12 1. p. 123 2. pp. 124-125
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Walk In Dry Places
AA is an Automatic Sprinkler System Emotional Emergencies Wise managers install automatic sprinkler systems to protect their businesses. The system's great value is that it goers into action during the first few minutes of a fire, before it gets out of control. This gives the fire department precious time to arrive and put the fire out. Our AA program gives us something like a sprinkler system. We never know when the flames of resentment might leap up, seemingly out of nowhere. If we've been working our program, something takes over automatically to begin dealing with resentment. This gives us time to bring more of our valuable spiritual tools into use. Knowing that resentment is burning away, we can try one thing and then another until it is brought to rest. Perhaps we will try prayer. We might also discuss our problem with a close friend or sponsor. Maybe we'll attend a meeting and lay the mater out for the group attention. We may help somebody, even in a small way. An amazing healing of resentment can come from any helpful action. Even a simple action like helping a person in a stalled automobile can work wonders in deflecting the pain of ongoing resentment. I need not fear the sudden appearance of resentment if I have been following my program.
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Keep It Simple
Easy Does It.---Twelve Steps slogan We are people who push ourselves to hard. We try to be perfect. Well, we need to lighten up. Easy Does It. We need to slow down our pace. Why? Because our program teaches us to give up trying to be perfect. We begin to love ourselves for who we are. We are enough. Over and over we hear this as we live the Steps. It's the message of God's love. Our Higher Power want us to live at a pace that's not fast and hard, so we always know we're loved. Remember, we've turned our life over to the care of God. And our life is a wonderful gift. As recovering people, we may know better than others. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me to live at Your pace, not mine. Help me keep in mind that life isn't a race. It's a spiritual journey. Walk with me. Action for the Day: Today, I'll take two hours just to relax and do loving things for myself. I'll take time to count my blessings.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Fortuitous circumstances constitute the moulds that shape the majority of human lives. --Augusta Evans Being in the right place at the right time is how we generally explain our good fortune or the good fortune of a friend. But it's to our advantage to understand how we managed to be in the right place at just the right moment. We have probably heard many times at meetings that God's timetable is not necessarily the same as our timetable. That events will happen as scheduled to fit a picture bigger than the picture encompassed by our egos. And frequently our patience wears thin because we aren't privy to God's timetable. But we can trust, today and always, that doors open on time. Opportunities are offered when we are ready for them. Nary a moment passes that doesn't invite us to both give and receive a special message--a particular lesson. We are always in God's care, and every circumstance of our lives is helping to mold the women we are meant to be. I will take a long look at where I am today and be grateful for my place. It's right for me, now, and is preparing me for the adventure ahead.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
There is an important exception to the foregoing. We realize some men are thoroughly bad-intentioned, that no amount of patience will make any difference. An alcoholic of this temperament may be quick to use this chapter as a club over your head. Don't let him get away with it. If you are positive he is one of this type you may feel you had better leave him. Is it right to let him ruin your life and the lives of your children? Especially when he has before him a way to stop his drinking and abuse if he really wants to pay the price.
p. 108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
However, there was one man on the staff who seemed different. He seemed different. He seemed very comfortable and at ease with a bit of a knowing sparkle in his eyes. This guy was clearly not as stuffy as the rest, and when he told me his story, I was surprised to find it very similar to mine--only his was no secret. He mentioned being a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. How could it be that he obviously had the respect of the staff after having lived a life of crime? How could it be that he was a lot like me but had made it back? Here was someone who was sober, yet cool; humble. yet firm in his convictions; serious, but not without a sense of humor. This was one to whom I could relate and maybe even trust. He may have saved my life just by being there, and to this day he doesn't even know it.
p. 508
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
The elders led Ed aside. They said firmly, "You can't talk like this around here. You'll have to quit it or get out." With great sarcasm Ed came back at them. "Now do tell! Is that so?" He reached over to a bookshelf and took up a sheaf of papers. On top of them lay the foreword to the book "Alcoholics Anonymous," then under preparation. He read aloud, "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking." Relentlessly, Ed went on, "When you guys wrote that sentence, did you mean it, or didn't you?" Dismayed, the elders looked at one another, for they knew he had them cold. So Ed stayed.
pp. 143-144
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We are responsible for the effort, not the outcome.
Better the foot slip than the tongue. --French Proverb
"The walls we build around us to keep out the sadness also keep out the joy." --Jim Rohn
"You must look into people, as well as at them." --Lord Chesterfield
God, help me recognize that I am a part of your creation and don't need to fight it. Help me live in peace and celebration of life. --Melody Beattie
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
HUMILITY
"I am a man; nothing human is alien to me." -- Terence
Humility is not so much about trying to be "good" as accepting that I am imperfect. For too long I thought that humility was "keeping the peace", appearing to be "perfect", bottling up my anger and resentments --- living a life of "people-pleasing".
Today I understand that humility is being real. It is accepting my humanity and being honest in my relationships. Humility is respecting the lives of others but also respecting my own. Humility is seeking to reveal that divinity that God has given to my life. Humility is knowing that in the lives of my fellow man --- the good and the bad --- is me.
Master, let me have the humility to be real.
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"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me." John 14:1
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:6-5
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Daily Inspiration
Hide your troubles and disappointments and you will find that they grow much smaller from neglect. Lord, help me to direct my focus so that I can make a difference today with a smile and a kind word.
Prayer may not always change a situation, but it will always change us. Lord, I accept Your answers to my prayers because I know that they will always be right and, in Your wisdom, best for me.
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NA Just For Today
An Awakening Of The Spirit
"The last thing we expected was an awakening of the spirit"
Basic Text, p. 48
Few of us came to our first Narcotics Anonymous meeting aching to take a personal inventory or believing that a spiritual void existed in our souls. We had no inkling that we were about to embark on a journey which would awaken our sleeping spirits.
Like a loud alarm clock, the First Step brings us to semiconsciousness—although at this point, we may not be sure whether we want to climb out of bed or maybe sleep for just five more minutes. The gentle hand shaking our shoulders as we apply the Second and Third Steps causes us to stand up, stretch, and yawn. We need to wipe the sleep from our eyes to write the Fourth Step and share our Fifth. But as we work the Sixth, Seventh, Eighth, and Ninth Steps, we begin noticing a spring in our step and the start of a smile on our lips. Our spirits sing in the shower as we take the Tenth and Eleventh Steps. And then we practice the Twelfth, leaving the house in search of others to awaken.
We don't have to spend the rest of our lives in a spiritual coma. We may not like to get up in the morning but, once out of bed, we're almost always glad we did.
Just for today: To awaken my sleepy spirit, I will use the Twelve Steps.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. It is always a mistake not to close one's eyes, whether to forgive or to look better into oneself. --Maurice Maeterlinck It is easy to look outward and find faults with the world and people around us. We criticize family members or complain about our friends. We always notice disease in the trees around us. But if we take time to be quiet, to sit alone in a tree or by a lake, we become more aware of how connected we are to the life around us. We are part of the beauty and the imperfection. When we notice our own tree is not perfect, it becomes easier to forgive the blights of those around us. It is also important to forgive ourselves our faults. Though all the trees are beautiful, they each have their scars. Being human means we are, like all humanity, both beautiful and imperfect. Will I see through the flaws to anther's beauty today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. If I truly showed my feelings, the other guys would eat me alive. It's too dog eat dog out there to be honest about the things that really count to you. You can't leave yourself wide open like that. --Michael E. McGill As we deepen our commitment to strong and mature manhood, we see a conflict between this program and much of what we learned as young men. When we drop our defenses and are honest, we take the chance of getting hurt. Many of us learned long ago that when we became vulnerable, others became abusive. It is difficult to abandon everything we learned about being nobody's fool and staying safe. In fact, we don't have to leave ourselves wide open. We can be selective about how open we will be and whom we will trust. But for our spiritual growth to continue, we must be an open book to ourselves, to our Higher Power, and to a few friends. We must face the fear of being open to others in this program. Developing true friends is part of the change, which the program brings. I pray for the courage to be honest with myself and to stand up for who I truly am with my friends.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Fortuitous circumstances constitute the moulds that shape the majority of human lives. --Augusta Evans Being in the right place at the right time is how we generally explain our good fortune or the good fortune of a friend. But it's to our advantage to understand how we managed to be in the right place at just the right moment. We have probably heard many times at meetings that God's timetable is not necessarily the same as our timetable. That events will happen as scheduled to fit a picture bigger than the picture encompassed by our egos. And frequently our patience wears thin because we aren't privy to God's timetable. But we can trust, today and always, that doors open on time. Opportunities are offered when we are ready for them. Nary a moment passes that doesn't invite us to both give and receive a special message--a particular lesson. We are always in God's care, and every circumstance of our lives is helping to mold the women we are meant to be. I will take a long look at where I am today and be grateful for my place. It's right for me, now, and is preparing me for the adventure ahead.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Control Sometimes, the gray days scare us. Those are the days when the old feelings come rushing back. We may feel needy, scared, ashamed, and unable to care for ourselves. When this happens, it's hard to trust ourselves, others, the goodness of life, and the good intentions of our Higher Power. Problems seem overwhelming. The past seems senseless; the future, bleak. We feel certain the things we want in life will never happen. In those moments, we may become convinced that things and people outside of ourselves hold the key to our happiness. That's when we may try to control people and situations to mask our pain. When these "codependent crazies" strike, others often begin to react negatively to our controlling. When we're in a frenzied state, searching for happiness outside ourselves and looking to others to provide our peace and stability, remember this: Even if we could control things and people, even if we got what we wanted, we would still be ourselves. Our emotional state would still be in turmoil. People and things don't stop our pain or heal us. In recovery, we learn that this is our job, and we can do it by using our resources: our Higher Power, our support systems, our recovery program, and ourselves. Often, after we've become peaceful, trusting, and accepting, what we want comes to us - with ease and naturalness. The sun begins to shine again. Isn't it funny, and isn't it true, how all change really does begin with us? I can let go of things and people and my need to control today. I can deal with my feelings. I can get peaceful. I can get calm. I can get back on track and find the true key to happiness - myself. I mil remember that a gray day is just that - one gray day.
Today I will "act as if" I am worth loving. I am beginning to tell myself that I am worthy of loving myself. I will acknowledge all the good and lovable things about me. I will "act as if" until I know that it is true. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Ask the Universe for Help
You have come so far. You have learned to ask for help from people when you need it. You have learned to ask God. God as you understand God, for help,too. Now you’re entering into a relationship with the universe, an active, vital, living relationship. Now you can learn to ask the universe for help as well.
Talk to the universe. Talk aloud if you can. Say: Show me, guide me, lead me, help me. This is what I want, this is what I need. Say: Show me which road to follow, where to go, and what to do. Yes, talk to people. Talk to God. They are part of the universe and world we live in. But talk aloud to the universe,too.
Then listen to your inner voice. hear what it says and trust what you hear. Answers come in many ways, from many sources, many places. But if the answer is right for you, your heart will know, and it will feel true.
Talk to the universe. Ask it for help. Then listen to your heart. Because that quiet voice, the one in your heart, is how the universe talks to you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Let a friend be there for you
I was at a carnival somewhere, sitting on a bench, eating blue cotton candy and experiencing the noise and color and the big carousel. Garishly colored horses bounced up and down, round and round, lights flashed; people whirred past. The little girl was on the verge of tears as her mother brought her up to the gate. She stalled, trying desperately to convince her mom, that no, she really didn’t want to go on the merry-go-round after all. Mom was reassuring but firm, and finally a deal was reached. Daughter would go on the big ride if her Mom would go,too.
They gave the man their tickets and walked around, the little one in awe of the multihued beasts that surrounded her. Finally, she settled on a white one with a gold mane and tail, and directed her mom to sit on the blue one next to her. Mom smiled, a little embarrassed, but complied with her daughter’s request.
Then the music started. And suddenly, they were both five years old, shrieking and laughing as their horses bounded away. I laughed,too, watching from my bench. They raced around an imaginary track through valleys, over rivers, across plains. The music screamed, the lights flashed, and for a few minutes, they could fly.
They were still laughing when the ride ended. “Again Mommy. Let’s go again!” laughed the girl excitedly. So they turned and got back in line. In letting go of her fear, that little girl was able to feel the wonder and excitement of a new experience, and in helping her daughter to overcome fear, the mother was able to recapture some of that thrill, as well. In our everyday lives, there are times when we are frightened, times when we need a friend to give us courage, and times when we can be a friend giving courage to someone else. Be grateful for those who have helped you find strength. Be grateful for the times when you have helped your friends find courage of their own.
Both sides of the coin are winners, and sometimes, experience is sweetest when shared.
God, help me reach out my hand in friendship and strength to those I meet along the way. And when I’m scared, help me give up my pride and ask a friend to stand by my side.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I become angry, can I admit to it and state it as a fact without allowing it to build up and burst out in inappropriate ways? Pent-up anger, I’ve finally begun to learn, quickly shatters the peace of mind that’s so critical to my on-going recovery. When I become enraged and lose control, I unwittingly handover control to the person, place, or thing with which I am enraged. When I’m angry will I tr to remember that I am endangering myself? Will I “count to ten” by calling a friend in The Program and say the Serenity Prayer aloud?
Today I Pray
May I recognize angry feelings and let them out a little a time, stating my anger as a fat, instead of allowing it to fester into rage and explode uncontrollable.
Today I Will Remember
Anger is. Rage need not be.
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One More Day
Reality is a staircase going neither up nor down, we don’t move, today is today, always is today. –Octavio Paz
Reality is a harsh word and can invade our everyday lives. When we are struggling to cope with the physical changes which occur with long-term medical problems, reality becomes our constant companion. No longer can we deny anxiety or discomfort.
Our self-imposed rules might be the framework of our lives, but we can build a new structure which accepts illness as part of the reality of our lives. This new structure can have much more depth and greater dimension than the original, for we are older and wiser. Part of the framework which gives our days meaning is our love for friends and family, and recognition of our spiritual capacity. These, too, become our new reality.
I no longer expect perfect health, but I can minimize my complaining and maximize my efforts to live a meaningful life.
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One Day At A Time
SETTING EXAMPLES
"Don't worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. Robert Fulgham
How many overweight people blame their size on genes? My whole family had weight problems. Everywhere I turn I see obese families. In my house we were taught that it is a sin to waste food. After all, there are starving people in the world. As if my cleaning my plate would really help a starving child. How many times was I rewarded with a sweet treat instead of a hug and a "Gee you did good - I'm really proud of you." A scraped knee always felt better if you put a candy on it. I could eat the treat after the pain was gone, so of course eating made you feel better fast. My parents didn't actually teach me that food would give me instant gratification in so many words, but I learned those lessons from observation. Food helped me get through some very difficult years. I never realized that there were tools that could help through them. Unfortunately, I only found OA after my children were grown up and had watched their coe mother make the same mistakes that her parents taught her. I am trying to set a better example now. I no longer have a pantry full of junk food and when I give my grandchildren treats, it's books, stickers, hairclips, toys, anything non-edible.
God, I realize that my parents unintentionally taught me bad eating habits and I forgive them. Please let my children forgive me for making the same mistakes. Help me to set a better example for the next generation. Please be with me when I buy groceries and let me bring only healthy food into my house. Help me to be satisfied with my abstinent meals so that I won't be tempted to binge and graze with little eyes upon me. I am so grateful for Your presence in my life, because I can't do this alone.
One day at a time . . . Please remind me that there are tools I can use instead of slipping into my old eating habits and let me be an example of the miracles that come with abstinence. Jeanette
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish. - Pg. 16 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Family and fellowship, sponsors and counselors are our source of strength and good feelings today, not Jim Beam and Mary Jane.
May I try not to control the people who help long enough to listen to their words of guidance.
Appreciating Life
I have the gift of life. I am here. I am alive, with all of my senses and able to experience the magic of this incredible world. Whatever this day has in store for me, I am open to receive. I will act on my day and allow my day to act on me. I am open. I will take steps that I know will make my day feel good, productive and pleasurable, and then I will let the rest happen. Each day presents me with gifts and surprises, if I know how to unwrap the present, if I remember how to be astonished or pleased.
Life itself is the gift.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Often the difference between a bad attitude and a good one is simply what you call it. You can be lonely or enjoy blessed solitude. You can be burdened or building strength. People can use you or you can be of use to others.
Whether it is AA for 'Altered Attitude,' NA for 'New Attitude,' or CDA for 'Change'D Attitude,' my attitude today is a direct reflection of my personal growth.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Misery is an option. But acceptance and gratitude did not come as standard equipment either.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will 'act as if' I am worth loving. I am beginning to tell myself that I am worthy of loving myself. I will acknowledge all the good and lovable things about me. I will 'act as if' until I know that it is true.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'd called AA and they sent this fella Kevin around. He came into my office, put his hand out and asked how I was. I said my standard 'Great'. And he kept hold of my hand pulled me up close, eye-balled me and said; 'Bull s...' - He was my sponsor from that day. - Dave B.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 15, 2017 17:40:26 GMT -5
February 16
Daily Reflections
COMMITMENT
Understanding is the key to right principles and attitudes, and right action is the key to good living. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125
There came a time in my program of recovery when the third stanza of the Serenity Prayer -- "The wisdom to know the difference" -- became indelibly imprinted in my mind. From that time on, I had to face the ever-present knowledge that my every action, word and thought was within, or outside, the principles of the program. I could no longer hide behind self-rationalization, nor behind the insanity of my disease. The only course open to me, if I was to attain a joyous life for myself (and subsequently for those I love), was one in which I imposed on myself an effort of commitment, discipline, and responsibility.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
One drink started a train of thought that became an obsession, and from then on, we couldn't stop drinking. We developed a mental compulsion to keep drinking until we got good and drunk. People generally make two mistakes about alcoholism. One mistake is that it can be cured by physical treatment only. The other mistake is that it can be cured by willpower only. Most alcoholics have tried both of these and have found that they don't work. But we members of A.A. have found a way to arrest alcoholism. Have I got over my obsession by following the A.A. program?
Meditation For The Day
I will try to be unruffled, no matter what happens. I will keep my emotions in check, although others about me are letting theirs go. I will keep calm in the face of disturbance, keep that deep, inner calm through all the experiences of the day. In the rush of work and worry, the deep, inner silence is necessary to keep me on an even keel. I must learn to take the calm with me into the most hurried days.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be still and commune with God. I pray that I may learn patience, humility, and peace.
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As Bill Sees It
Seeing Is Believing, p. 47
The Wright Brothers' almost childish faith that they could build a machine which would fly was the mainspring of their accomplishment. Without that, nothing could have happened.
We agnostics and atheists were sticking to the idea that self-sufficiency would solve our problems. When others showed us that God-sufficiency worked with them, we began to feel like those who had insisted the Wrights would never fly. We were seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems.
Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 52-53
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Walk In Dry Places
Mental Arguments are bad Thinking____Serenity Again and again we hear that bad thinking and drinking are linked together. Bad thinking is any line of thought that tends to be destructive. Mental arguments are in that class because they destroy peace of mind and self-control. We can avoid them by learning acceptance and maintaining serenity at all costs. Sometimes we engage in mental arguments with those who seem to have defeated us or put us down. This only gives more life to the hurt we have been feeling: in effect, we cooperate in hurting ourselves repeatedly. Even the satisfaction of letting ourselves "win" the mental argument doesn't really settle the matter. We can maintain our serenity in all situations by accepting people as they are. We are not responsible for changing their opinions. We must also accept and dismiss past mistakes and failures, no matter who was at fault. We owe it to ourselves not to destroy another moment's happiness with futile mental arguments that serve no good purpose in our lives. Once we dismiss mental arguments, we can give our time and attention to things that really matter. I will not waste a single second on any kid of mental argument. Anything another person said or did is forgiven and forgotten, and it has no power to hurt me a second time.
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Keep It Simple
Friendships, like marriages, are dependent on avoiding the unforgivable.---John D. MacDonald We need to remember that relationships are made up of people---people who are strong, but also fragile. We don't break easily, but we do break. We need to be aware of how fragile relationships are. Don't say something that will hurt others even if it's honest. It's mean to be honest with someone, without showing that you care for the person's feelings. We can learn to be honest without being cruel. The backbone of any relationship is this: we need to honor the rules and agreements we make. If we promise to be faithful to someone, we follow this rule. And we need to trust the other person to do the same. When we see that our agreements don't work, we need to go to that person and talk about them. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me become a person who honors rules and agreements in my relationships. Actions for the Day: I'll make no promises today that I will not keep.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Within our dreams and aspirations we find our opportunities. --Sue Atchley Ebaugh Our dreams beckon us to new heights. All that we may need is the courage to move toward them, taking the necessary steps to realize those dreams. Trusting that we will be shown the steps, one at a time, patiently waiting for the right step and right time is all we need to do, today. Our dreams, when they are for the good of ourselves and others, are invitations from God to spread our wings, to attempt new heights. Those dreams are part of the destiny designed for us. They are not happenstance. Our gifts are unique. Our contributions are ours alone. Our dreams reflect the contributions we are called on to make in this life. Our opportunities for fulfillment are varied and not always recognized as for our good. Again and again we need to turn to God, be patient, and trust that we are being called to offer something very special to those around us. No one of us has escaped a special plan. And everyone of us is inspired in particular ways, with particular talents. Our recovery is clearing the way for us to burst forth with our talents. I will be grateful for all that I am, for all that I have. And I will remember, what I give today to friends around me is mine only to give.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
The problem with which you struggle usually falls within one of four categories: One: Your husband may be only a heavy drinker. His drinking may be constant or it may be heavy only on certain occasions. Perhaps he spends too much money for liquor. It may be slowing him up mentally and physically, but he does not see it. Sometimes he is a source of embarrassment to you and his friends. He is positive he can handle his liquor, that it does him no harm, that drinking is necessary in his business. He would probably be insulted if he were called an alcoholic. This world is full of people like him. Some will moderate or stop altogether, and some will not. Of those who keep on, a good number will become true alcoholics after a while. Two: Your husband is showing lack of control, for he is unable to stay on the water wagon even when he wants to. He often gets entirely out of hand when drinking. He admits this is true, but is positive that he will do better. He has begun to try, with or without your cooperation, various means of moderating or staying dry. Maybe he is beginning to lose his friends. His business may suffer somewhat. He is worried at times, and is becoming aware that he cannot drink like other people. He sometimes drinks in the morning and through the day also, to hold his nervousness in check. He is remorseful after serious drinking bouts and tells you he wants to stop. But when he gets over the spree, he begins to think once more how he can drink moderately next time. We think this person is in danger. These are the earmarks of a real alcoholic. Perhaps he can still tend to business fairly well. He has by no means ruined everything. As we say among ourselves, "He wants to want to stop." Three: This husband has gone much further than husband number two. Though once like number two he became worse. His friends have slipped away, his home is a near-wreck and he cannot hold a position. Maybe the doctor has been called in, and the weary round of sanitariums and hospitals has begun. He admits he cannot drink like other people, but does not see why. He clings to the notion that he will yet find a way to do so. He may have come to the point where he desperately wants to stop but cannot. His case presents additional questions which we shall try to answer for you. You can be quite hopeful of a situation like this. Four: You may have a husband of whom you completely despair. He has been placed in one institution after another. He is violent, or appears definitely insane when drunk. Sometimes he drinks on the way home from the hospital. Perhaps he has had delirium tremens. Doctors may shake their heads and advise you to have him committed. Maybe you have already been obliged to put him away. This picture may not be as dark as it looks. Many of our husbands were just as far gone. Yet they got well.
pp. 108 -110
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Alcoholics Anonymous - First Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
Over the next few days I was still not talking much, but I was listening and watching. I learned more about how Alcoholic Anonymous works and met more of its members. I found out it was not something they left at the hospital as they went home; it was a way of life. I found out it was spirituality, not religion. I saw them enjoying themselves, and they all agreed on one thing: If I wanted to change my life as they had changed theirs, I could, as long as I became willing to do what they did. I became fascinated. Here I was, the scum of the earth, yet they came to me and invited me to join them. I started to feel that if I was ever going to try something different, I'd better do it now. It might be my last chance. After all, I still had to deal with the authorities, and I had nothing to lose by playing along. So I read their book, I started to work their steps, and (with the door closed and the lights out) I asked for a little help from a HIgher Power as they suggested. Finally, they highly recommended that I attend their meetings--especially the first night out.
pp. 508-509
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Ed not only stayed, he stayed sober - month after month. The longer he kept dry, the louder he talked - against God. The group was in anguish so deep that all fraternal charity had vanished. "When, oh when," groaned members to one another, "will that guy get drunk?"
p. 144
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What you are is God's Gift to you. What you become is your gift to God.
Take time for solitude. How else can you contemplate the blessings of recovery. --Abby Warman
In my pain I seek the comfort and guidance of my Higher Power. Grace and gratitude are the gifts I receive. --Rose Casey
God does not require that we be successful, only that we be faithful. --Mother Teresa
Spiritual experience is personal and individual. --Veronica Ray
Like a loving parent, God prepares good things for us. --Einar Ingvi Magnusson
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ENEMIES
"The Bible tells us to love our neighbors and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people." -- G. K. Chesterton
The spiritual program that I embrace makes me look to where I am, rather than where I want to be. I must live in the now, rather than the never-never-land of tomorrow.
To love my world I need to seek to understand those people who live in my world. To love my world involves an acceptance of those who are different from me. I must seek to build bridges, rather than barriers. It is so easy for me to talk about loving and being concerned for the starving millions and forgetting to love and relate to the typist in my office or the neighbor down the street.
I have some experience of people who can be difficult because I lived with the addicted me for many years; I am the key to my enemies.
Teach me to accept in love those who, for today, I do not like.
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If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 1: 1-13
Show me Your ways, O LORD; Teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, For You are the God of my salvation; On You I wait all the day. Psalm 25:4-5
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Daily Inspiration
No troubles that we face are new to this world. Guide and protect me, Lord, and strengthen my faith and trust in You so that I will not falter.
God gives us power, love and self-discipline, not fear and timidness. Lord, I will not be afraid to proclaim that You are my God. All will see it in my actions.
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NA Just For Today
Faithful Feelings
"When we refuse to accept the reality of today we are denying faith in our Higher Power This can only bring more suffering." IP No. 8, "Just for Today"
Some days just aren't the way we wish they would be. Our problems may be as simple as a broken shoelace or having to stand in line at the supermarket. Or we may experience something far more serious, such as the loss of a job, a home, or a loved one. Either way, we often end up looking for a way to avoid our feelings instead of simply acknowledging that those feelings are painful.
No one promises us that everything will go our way when we stop using. In fact, we can be sure that life will go on whether we're using or not. We will face good days and bad days, comfortable feelings and painful feelings. But we don't have to run from any of them any longer.
We can experience pain, grief, sadness, anger, frustration- all those feelings we once avoided with drugs. We find that we can get through those emotions clean. We won't die and the world won't come to an end just because we have uncomfortable feelings. We learn to trust that we can survive what each day brings.
Just for today: I will demonstrate my trust in God by experiencing this day just as it is.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Shame-filled people feel that something is wrong at their very core. It is a sense of being bad . . .. --Susan Kwiecien Nobody is rotten to the core. Whenever we start to believe we are bad all the way through, we can picture good things we have done, days when someone else was happy to be with us, and see for ourselves that we have many good points that outweigh the bad. If we have done something wrong, we must apologize and make amends. Making a mistake is not the same as being worthless. Mistakes are a natural part of living, not something to be ashamed of. Our freedom to make mistakes is one of our greatest assets, for this is the way we learn humility, persistence, courage to take risks, and better ways of doing things. All of us are valuable and lovable. How could we be otherwise? Since mistakes are natural aspects of growth, we can salute them in others and ourselves as signs of life and celebrate our ability to learn and to forgive. What mistakes have helped me grow?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. Hatred is never anything but fear - if you feared no one, you would hate no one. --Hugh Downs On those occasions when we find the bigger man within, we are more generous in spirit toward others. But sometimes we think too much about what is wrong with others and how they ought to change. That is a form of hate. If we are searching for what we have power to change in our families, in our friendships, in the world, we can learn to be big enough to set aside our fears. Do we bear ill will toward someone today? When we are honest with ourselves, do we feel a sense of fear in relation to this person? What are we really afraid of? Perhaps the same person fears us. When we can do something about our fear, the hatred melts with no further effort. Then we are in touch with the bigger man within. I have the inner, strength to face my fears today. I will not send them outward as hatred.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Detachment The concept of letting go can be confusing to many of us. When are we doing too much or trying too hard to control people and outcomes? When are we doing too little? When is what we're doing an appropriate part of taking care of ourselves? What is our responsibility, and what isn't? These issues can challenge us whether we've been in recovery ten days or ten years. Sometimes, we may let go so much that we neglect responsibility to others or ourselves. Other times, we may cross the line from taking care of ourselves to controlling others and outcomes. There is no rulebook. But we don't have to make ourselves crazy; we don't have to be so afraid. We don't have to do recovery perfectly. If it feels like we need to do a particular action, we can do it. If no action feels timely or inspired, don't act on it. Having and setting healthy limits - healthy boundaries - isn't a tidy process. We can give ourselves permission to experiment, to make mistakes, to learn, to grow. We can talk to people, ask questions, and question ourselves. If there's something we need to do or learn, it will become apparent. Lessons don't go away. If we're not taking care of ourselves enough, well see that. If we are being too controlling, we'll grow to understand that too. Things will work out. The way will become dear. Today, I will take actions that appear appropriate. I will let go of the rest. I will strive for the balance between self-responsibility, responsibility to others, and letting go.
Peace and relaxation flow through me with every breath that I take. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
The Answer May Be Right in Front of You
It was late at night. I had just pulled into Chimayo, New Mexico. The streets were poorly lit, addresses and signs were difficult to see. I had been driving around for what seemed like hours, looking for an address. Finally, in desperation. I stopped the car, got out, and flagged someone down. A man stopped, but said he couldn’t help me. I was at my wits end. I turned around, staring frantically at the mailbox in front of me. To my surprise, I was right where I wanted to go.
How often we wave our hands in panic and despair, certain the answer, the insight, the piece of information we need will never come. Yet often the answer we’re seeking is right in front of us.
There’s a part of us, our heart, that knows where we’re going, knows what we need, knows what the next step is. Our heart will lead us on. Our soul will move us forward. Our instincts will take us home like a radar signal beaming us to safety.
Feel your panic. Feel your frustration. But keep your eyes and your heart open. The answer may be closer than you think– maybe it’s right in front of you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Joy is your destiny
Adam fell that man might be, and men are that they might have joy. –Book of Mormon
In the garden, original man was perfect, unchanging, never knowing sickness or the sorrow of separation. It was only after the fall that we could learn the contrast between joy and sorrow and truly learn what joy is. More than the absence of sorrow, it is the embrace of life in all its turmoil. To live joyously means living with full awareness of how impermanent each life on earth is– how precious each moment, each conversation, each sunrise is.
Each day is the beginning of another new adventure, another opportunity to take a chance and live life to its fullest.
Look around you. Find the joy in your world.
After all, that’s why you’re here.
God, help me find and create true joy and peace in my world.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
What about “justifiable anger?” If somebody cheats us or acts toward us in an outrageous manner, don’t we have the right to be furious? The hard-learned experiences of countless others in The Program tell us that adventures in rage are usually extremely dangerous. So, while we must recognize anger enough to say “I am angry,” we must not allow the build-up of rage, however justifiable. Can I accept the fact that if I am to live, I have to be free of anger?
Today I Pray
Even though I go out of the way to skirt them, may I be aware that there always will be certain situations or certain people who will make me angry. When my anger doesn’t seem justifiable — with arguable reason behind it — I may deny it, even to myself. May I recognize my anger, whether it is reasonable or not, before I bury it alive.
Today I Will Remember
It is alright to feel anger.
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One More Day
Every Soul is a melody which needs renewing. – Stephne Mellarme
It may be difficult to admit how discordant our lives become at times — and even more difficult to restore a sense of peace. We may plunge into self-improvement programs with the idea that we, and we alone, can fix ourselves and ease our emotional pain. In doing this, we ignore the spiritual resources outside ourselves.
We better understand and accept our human flaws now and find it easier to ask God for help. Occasionally we may feel inadequate or angry or frightened. We question and doubt ourselves; we get lost in the maze of our own emotions. But we know these feelings are only temporary and that the calming spiritual tempo of our lives is briefly being drowned out by the emotions of the moment. It is comforting to know the melody is always there.
Today, I trust God to keep me in tune with the peace within.
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One Day At A Time
A TEENAGER'S PRAYER
"I felt as if angels were pushing." Adolf Galland - on his first flight in a jet aircraft
A letter from a TRG Teenager . . . . .
Sometimes I feel I really can't take anymore, I really can't do it. I feel so alone. I feel no one cares. I just want to hide away and eat and eat until I am so sick I can't eat anymore.
A minute at a time I got through my day, and it was so hard. Didn't anyone understand how hard it is to get through school with the teachers giving me a hard time. The other kids laughing at me in a corner, I know they are, I can feel them. They don't know what it's like to be me. And when I get home, I get even more of a hard time.
But sometimes I feel so bad and I come here on my computer and share or I go to an online meeting, and I know I'm not alone after all. Someone cares, they really do.
I feel heaps better and I suddenly realize that angels had pushed me through the day. And even though the day had been hard, I HAD got through it! I had a whole day of abstinence!
Suddenly I feel so much better about myself, about you and about the world in general.
One day at a time ... I will remember tonight. An angel walked with me today, and if I close my eyes and sleep, maybe, just maybe an angel will walk with me in my dreams. Anonymous
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. - Pg. 14-15 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is no one with a 'better' program than another if they are clean and sober for we know that we are only one drink away from a drunk--each and everyone of us!
May I realize that I am no better or worse than another, or them from me. We are equal in our recovery.
Looking Toward What is Good
I am a creative being. I have the power of reason, the ability to think, hope and dream. I can envision my life not only as it is, but as I might wish it to be. I can then think through the steps I might need to become more of who I wish to be. I have the power to think my way into a happy point of view, to see the glass as half full rather than half empty. My mind can be my greatest enemy or my greatest ally. It depends on how I choose to use it.
I hold a beautiful vision of life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'Rather than put a label on yourself as Christian, Jew, Moslem, Buddhist, or whatever, instead make a commitment to be Christ-like, God-like, Buddha-like and Mohammed-like.' -Dr. Wayne Dryer
I make a commitment to be 'Twelve Step-like' today.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Real change requires real change.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Peace and relaxation flow through me with every breath that I take.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
An alcoholic is a fellow who is trying to get his religion out of a bottle, when what he really wants is unity within himself. Unity with God. - Bill W.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 16, 2017 17:09:00 GMT -5
February 17
Daily Reflections
THE LOVE IN THEIR EYES
Some of us won't believe in God, others can't, and still others who do not believe that God exists have no faith whatever He will perform this miracle. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 25
It was the changes I saw in the new people who came into the Fellowship that helped me lose my fear, and change my negative attitude to a positive one. I could see the love in their eyes and I was impressed by how much their "One Day at a Time" sobriety meant to them. They had looked squarely at Step Two and came to believe that a power greater than themselves was restoring them to sanity. That gave me faith in the Fellowship, and hope that it could work for me too. I found that God was a loving God, not that punishing God I feared before coming to A.A. I also found that He had been with me during all those times I had been in trouble before I came to A.A. I know today that He was the one who led me to A.A. and that I am a miracle.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Alcohol is poison to the alcoholic. Poison is not too strong a word, because alcoholism leads eventually to the death of the alcoholic. It may be a quick death or a slow death. When we go by package stores and see various kinds of liquor all dressed up in fancy packages to make it look attractive, we should always make it a point to say to ourselves, so that we'll never forget it: That stuff's poison to me. And it is. Alcohol poisoned our lives for a long time. Do I know that since I am an alcoholic all liquor is poison to me?
Meditation For The Day
I must somehow find the means of coming nearer to God. That is what really matters. I must somehow seek the true bread of life, which is communion with Him. I must grasp at the truth at the center of all worship. This central truth is all that matters. All forms of worship have this communion with God as their purpose and goal.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may meet God in quiet communion. I pray that I may partake of the soul-food which God has provided for me.
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As Bill Sees It
Live Serenely, p. 48
When a drunk has a terrific hangover because he drank heavily yesterday, he cannot live well today. But there is another kind of hangover which we all experience whether we are drinking or not. That is the emotional hangover, the direct result of yesterday's and sometimes today's excesses of negative emotion--anger, fear, jealousy, and the like.
If we would live serenely today and tomorrow, we certainly need to eliminate these hangovers. This doesn't mean we need to wander morbidly around in the past. It requires an admission and correction of errors--now.
12 & 12, pp. 88-89
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Walk In Dry Places
Be Careful What you Pray for____Choosing the right goals. "Be careful what you pray for," the Old-Timers said, for you are likely to get it. While this sounds exciting, it's really an important warning. Prayers are currents of thought directed toward a goal. The goal must be something few want to live with once it is achieved. What often happens, unfortunately, is that we seek things that turn out to be shallow and even harmful after we get them. Such disillusionment has been the stuff of countless morality tales. Our bitter experiences with alcohol can also furnish lessons about the kinds of goals we should strive for in sobriety. Let's take an inventory if we find ourselves thinking that our happiness depends on certain people, places, or things. Our true happiness comes from our Higher Power and the right combination of love and service. With the right attitude, we can actually be happy under many kinds of conditions and with all sorts of people. What, then, should we pray for? "Knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out," is a prayer that puts things in proper order. Seek to do God's will, and you might be utterly amazed at the results. After all, it is God's pleasure to give you good things. I'll pray for knowledge of God's will today, while exercising prudence in all my affairs.
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Keep It Simple
. . . no one who learns to know himself remains just what he was before---Thomas Mann Deep inside, we all know that we're changing. It started when we took Step One. We learned and accepted something new about ourselves. That changed us, just a little. We no longer wanted to live as addicts. That meant we had to change and to learn to live sober. It's been nonstop ever since: learn about ourselves, change a little, learn about ourselves, change a little more, and so on. All we know is that each step of learning and changing makes life better. How long can it keep getting better? As long as we keep learning to know ourselves. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me about myself today. Teach me gently. Action for the Day: Today, I'll think about what I've learned about myself by working the program. I'll list five things.
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Each Day a New Beginning
One can never pay in gratitude; one can only pay "in kind" somewhere else in life. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh Life is a series of payments. The common expression, "What goes around, comes around," is a truth that governs each of our lives. As women and as members of the human family, we have received untold "payments" from others. On occasion, the payment may not have been one we'd have chosen for ourselves. It takes the distance of time to realize that our payments are meant for our good. And we can share the goodness; in fact, we need to share the goodness with one another. If we give to another the joy given to us, if we give to another the understanding given to us, if we give to another the friendship given to us, we will be ready to receive more in kind. You and I meet today to make payments. I will receive yours gladly.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Let's now go back to number one. Oddly enough, he is often difficult to deal with. He enjoys drinking. It stirs his imagination. His friends feel closer over a highball. Perhaps you enjoy drinking with him yourself when he doesn't go too far. You have passed happy evenings together chatting and drinking before your fire. Perhaps you both like parties which would be dull without liquor. We have enjoyed such evenings ourselves; we had a good time. We know all about liquor as a social lubricant. Some, but not all of us, think it has its advantages when reasonably used.
p. 110
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
I walked out of there on a sunny afternoon. I intended to go to a meeting that night, but I also had ten dollars in my pocket and a reason to celebrate. I was sober for twenty-two days, and I was feeling pretty good about myself. Soon my old instincts began to take over. Sunny day. Ten bucks. Celebration. Feeling good, Before I knew it, I was walking into the back door of one of my old watering holes. The smell of alcohol hit me when I entered, and my mouth watered. I sat down at the bar. I ordered my usual ginger wash. Couldn't I make it just one day without drinking? At this question I realized that yes, since I put it that way, I probably could make it just one day without drinking. Besides, I was going to a meeting that night and who knows, they might have breathalyzers there. I put down my dollar, got off that stool, and walked back out the door. After all, I could drink tomorrow if I wanted to--and that's just what I planned to do.
p. 509
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Quite a while later, Ed got a sales job which took him out of town. At the end of a few days, the news came in. He'd sent a telegram for money, and everybody knew what that meant! Then he got on the phone. In those days, we'd go anywhere on a Twelfth Step job, no matter how unpromising. But this time nobody stirred. "Leave him alone! Let him try it by himself for once; maybe he'll learn a lesson!"
p. 144
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If you want to feel rich, just count the things money can't buy. --Cited in BITS & PIECES
The alcoholic is in no greater peril than when he takes sobriety for granted.
There is no place where God is not. --Joan Borysenko, Ph.D., Fire In The Soul
A positive attitude can overcome most daily troubles. So wake up and set your mind to it, first thing every day.
It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. --e. e. cummings
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. --Lao Tzu
Whom do I need to forgive? --Suzannah Willingham
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
BELONGING
"But one day when I was sitting quiet and feeling like a motherless child, which I was, it came to me that feeling of being part of everything, not separate at all. I knew that if I cut a tree, my arm would bleed." -- Alice Walker
Today I am aware of the truth that I belong. I am an essential part of God's world. I share divinity because God made me. Today I choose to seek that spiritual center in me that is forever positive and creative. Today I am the center of my universe.
Past hurts and wrongs cannot take away the uniqueness in my life. Past abuses and painful put-downs, my years of alternating between the lost child and the scapegoat in my family need not make me a victim today. Today I am free to choose recovery and an acceptance of self. Today I choose to associate with the winners of this world. Today I participate in creation by being a creative person for me. Yesterday's pain need not have any power in my life today.
When I kneel before the stream, mountains and stars, I feel me.
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Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14
Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him. James 1:12
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Daily Inspiration
There is a purpose for our trials and burdens just as there is a purpose for the joys and wonders in our lives. Lord, grant me Your peace as Your plan for me unfolds.
Thoughts are powerful, so pay close attention to what you think about. Lord, help me to think thoughts of love, peace and abundance so that this becomes my experience.
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NA Just For Today
Carrying The Message, Not The Addict
"They can be analyzed, counseled, reasoned with, prayed over, threatened, beaten, or locked up, but they will not stop
until they want to stop."
Basic Text, p. 62
Perhaps one of the most difficult truths we must face in our recovery is that we are as powerless over another's
addiction as we are over our own. We may think that because we've had a spiritual awakening in our own lives we
should be able to persuade another addict to find recovery. But there are limits to what we can do to help another
addict.
We cannot force them to stop using. We cannot give them the results of the steps or grow for them. We cannot take
away their loneliness or their pain. There is nothing we can say to convince a scared addict to surrender the familiar
misery of addiction for the frightening uncertainty of recovery. We cannot jump inside other peoples' skins, shift their
goals, or decide for them what is best for them.
However, if we refuse to try to exert this power over another's addiction, we may help them. They may grow if we
allow them to face reality, painful though it may be. They may become more productive, by their own definition, as long
as we don't try and do it for them. They can become the authority on their own lives, provided we are only authorities
on our own. If we can accept all this, we can become what we were meant to be - carriers of the message, not the
addict.
Just for today: I will accept that I am powerless not only over my own addiction but also over everyone else's. I will
carry the message, not the addict.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There is glory In a great mistake. --Nathalia Crane Once there was a big girl who liked to play with little kids and their toys. One day she rode one of their small bikes and
her foot slipped off the little pedal and her leg got caught and dragged along the sidewalk. She went home, limping and howling. Her mother put ice on the terrible scrape. The next day, the girl's mother told her
she was too big for the little kids' toys. The girl looked up defiantly and said, "I can TOO ride that baby bike." The girl's mother didn't say anything else. She knew people must be free to make mistakes. We cannot protect
another person from the experiences of the world. It would be harmful to both of us to try. What mistakes have I made more than once before I learned my lesson?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them, more strength to relate to people than to dominate
them, more "manhood" to abide by thought out principles rather than blind reflex. Toughness is in the soul and spirit,
not in muscles and an immature mind. --Alex Karras In our culture, being a man often means being tough, having sexual prowess, and not showing feelings. We realize in
this life of recovery that those are silly and immature myths, even though we see them repeatedly on TV, on billboards,
and in newspapers. When we are told these things repeatedly, it makes an impact on us. So we need to hear from each other that this is
not the way we wish to live. We don't admire these attitudes, and we don't believe the stories. Truly courageous men
know themselves. They have been around enough to have depth to their souls, to let themselves love, and to feel the
pain of life. Today, I am grateful to know and share my feelings and to have genuine relationships with those I love.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Acceptance Our basic recovery concept that never loses its power to work miracles is the concept called acceptance. We do not achieve acceptance in a moment. We often have to work through a mirage of feelings - sometimes anger,
outrage, shame, self-pity, or sadness. But if acceptance is our goal, we will achieve it. What is more freeing than to laugh at our weaknesses and to be grateful for our strengths? To know the entire
package called "us" - with all our feelings, thoughts, tendencies, and history - is worthy of acceptance and brings
healing feelings. To accept our circumstances is another miraculous cure. For anything to change or anyone to change, we must first
accept others, the circumstance, and ourselves exactly as they are. Then, we need to take it one step further. We
need to become grateful for our circumstances or ourselves. We add a touch of faith by saying, "I know this is exactly
the way it's supposed to be for the moment." No matter how complicated we get, the basics never lose their power to restore us to sanity. Today, God, help me practice the concept of acceptance in my life. Help me accept others, my circumstances, and
myself. Take me one step further, and help me feel grateful.
Even in moments of doubt I know that my Higher Power is guiding me on my path today. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Who Empowers You?
Most of us need people around us who empower and help us feel able, on track, in balance, hopeful. We need people
who tell us we can. Even if they don’t use words, they believe in us and that belief comes shining through. We look at
them and what we see reflected back is our own power.
But sometimes we run into those who, instead, try to convince us of their power, convince us that they have our
answers, that we need them to be able to see clearly, that without them, we won’t be able to find the way. They don’t
believe in us, they only believe in themselves. That’s not empowerment. That’s an approach destined to create
dependency, often unhealthy dependency.
Cultivate relationships with people who make you feel like you can, who help you know that you’re on track, right where
you need to be. Spend time with people who help you know that you can trust yourself.
Seek out people who empower you. Learn to empower those you love. And during those times when no one’s around,
know that you can empower yourself.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Lighten up
“Mom, can I sleep over at Johnny’s house again tonight? Please?” Shane begged.
“Why?” I asked.
“For fun,” he said.
“You just slept over last night,” I said.
“Who said you can’t have fun two days in a row?” he asked.
While ideas such as discipline and focus are undeniably important, so is the idea of having fun.
With a small amount of effort, we can extract all the fun and joy out of most parts of our lives– our relationships, our
work, even our leisure time. We can put so many restrictions and should’s on everything we do that our very lives
become dull, overly ponderous and routine. Before long, we find ourselves living up to a set of rules– and we’re not
certain where the rules came from or whose they are.
I relented, and let Shane have the sleepover he asked for. He had fun. He had a lot of fun that entire year. So did I.
Let yourself go. Have a little fun with life. Or, have a lot of fun with life. If you’ve spent years being extremely disciplined,
reliable, and somber, maybe part of achieving balance is having a decade of fun.
Dig out your goal list, the one you placed at the back of this book. Add another value to your list, have as much fun and
joy as possible in the days, months, and years to come.
It’s time to lighten up.
God, please show me how to put ideas like fun and joy back into my life. Show me how to have more fun in work, in
love, and in play.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
If I become angry today, I’ll pause and think before I say anything, remembering that my anger can turn back upon me
and worsen my difficulties,. I’ll try to remember, too, that well-timed silence can give me command of a stressful
situation as angry reproaches never can. In such moments of stress, I’ll remember that my power over others ins
nonexistent, and that only God is all-powerful. Have I learned that I alone can destroy my own peace of mind?
Today I Pray
May I learn that I can choose how to handle my anger — in silence or a tantrum, a rage, a fist fight , a pillow fight, a
tirade, and elaborate plan to “get back at” whoever caused it, an icy glare, a cool pronouncement of hate — or a
simple statement of fact, “I am angry at you because ______” (in 25 words or less). Or may I , if need be, turn my
anger into energy and shovel the walk, bowl or play a game of tennis, or clean the house. I pray that God will show me
appropriate ways to deal with my anger.
Today I Will Remember
“I am angry because..”
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One More Day
Grace is the absence of everything that indicates pain or difficulty, hesitation or incongruity. – William Hazlitt
It seems that, when we think of our lives are back on course, another obstacle appears and we stumble. In the case of
physical illness, symptoms or pain may worsen or new problems may crop up. Other circumstances can make our
stress level rise as well, until it feels as though we just can’t carry the burden anymore.
Adjustments can be very difficult. With new symptoms we may feel that illness is chipping away, one tiny piece at a
time, at our independence. It’s difficult to be gracious with so many complications going on. Yet this is the time to be
gracious — to ourselves and to those around us.
If I have ever needed to reach into my innermost being to find peace and contentment, it is now. I dislike what has
happened to my body, but I can continue to be a gracious person.
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One Day At A Time
~ CHANGES ~
They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself. Andy Warhol
Time changes things – but what things? Can I wait for time to change those ways of coping that don’t serve me
anymore? Can I wait for time to make me abstinent?
Yes, time will change things, but chances are that these will be the changes: my coping mechanisms will become
even more entrenched and my eating even more destructive. I don’t really want to wait for that kind of change. When I
joined OA, I started a new trend. I asked for the wisdom to understand which things I can change and then, armed with
the tools of the program, I set about following my new trend of eating healthy and living a life where I don’t sit around
waiting.
I will not wait idly for things to get better. I will ask my Higher Power to guide me to make necessary changes.
One Day at a Time . . . I will not wait idly for things to get better. I will ask my Higher Power to guide me to make necessary changes. ~ Isabella M. ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
That the man who is making the approach has had the same difficulty, that he obviously knows what he is talking
about, that his whole deportment shouts at the new prospect that he is a man with a real answer, that he has no
attitude of Holier Than Thou, nothing whatsoever except the sincere desire to be helpful; that there are no fees to pay,
no axes to grind, no people to please, no lectures to be endured -- these are the conditions we have found most
effective. After such an approach many take up their beds and walk again. - Pg. 18-19 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Our 12 steps are dedicated primarily to the cultivation of principle in the befuddled addict's mind. Spiritual soundness
leads to mental soundness. Even though we don't understand the process of our program to stop our cravings, we
must trust that IT WORKS.
I look at those around me, at their success and know that this process WORKS even if it isn't clear how.
Seeing Perfection in What Is
I see life as it is today. I do not ask that the world conform to my idea of perfection in order to love it. I see beauty and
perfection in things as they are, not as I wish them to be. I forgive life for being imperfect. I forgive people for being
imperfect. I forgive myself for being imperfect.I let life, people and me be what we are.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Recovery is a Process Not an Event. There will never be a graduation day for your new way of life. The more you learn
and grow the more you will see that you have more to learn and grow. That is what Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve are
all about.
I learn to grow and grow to learn. My day of graduation is when I die.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
For our suggestions you have two choices: Take it or leave it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Even in moments of doubt I know that my Higher Power is guiding me on my path today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The road to recovery is always under construction. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 18, 2017 0:24:36 GMT -5
February 18
Daily Reflections
OUR PATHS ARE OUR OWN
... there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 25
My first attempt at the Steps was one of obligation and necessity, which resulted in a deep feeling of discouragement in the face of all those adverbs: courageously; completely; humbly; directly; and only. I considered Bill W. fortunate to have gone through such a major, even sensational, spiritual experience. I had to discover, as time went on, that my path was my own. After a few twenty-four hours in the A.A. Fellowship, thanks especially to the sharing of members in meetings, I understood that everyone gradually finds his or her own pace in moving through the Steps. Through progressive means, I try to live according to these suggested principles. As a result of these Steps, I can say today that my attitude towards life, people, and towards anything having to do with God, has been transformed and improved.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
After I became an alcoholic, alcohol poisoned my love for my family and friends, it poisoned my ambition, it poisoned my self-respect. It poisoned my whole life, until I met A.A. My life is happier now than it has been for a long time. I don't want to commit suicide. So with the help of God and A.A., I'm not going to take any more of that alcoholic poison into my system. And I'm going to keep training my mind never even to think of liquor again in any way except as a poison. Do I believe that liquor will poison my life if I ever touch it again?
Meditation For The Day
I will link up my frail nature with the limitless Divine Power. I will link my life with the Divine Force for Good in the world. It is not the passionate appeal that gains the Divine attention as much as the quiet placing of the difficulty and worry in the Divine Hands. So I will trust God like a child who places its tangled skein of wool in the hands of a loving mother to unravel. We please God more by our unquestioning confidence than by imploring Him for help.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may put all my difficulties in God's hands and leave them there. I pray that I may fully trust God to take care of them.
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As Bill Sees It
Out Of Defect. . . Strength, p. 49
If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that some day we will be immune to alcohol.
<< << << >> >> >>
Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one's old life as a condition for finding a new one.
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 33 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 46
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Walk In Dry Places
Shining shoes for Subordinates Growing in Humility Did you ever hear of a man named Samuel Logan Brengle? He was a Salvation Army office whose spiritual consciousness was legendary. But he didn't start that way. A gifted ministerial student of the nineteenth century, he joined the Salvation Army only to find himself sent to a cellar to clean the shoes of other cadets___ most of them far below him in learning and intelligence. Brengle used that humbling experience to conquer his pride and resentment. He later recalled the utter joy he felt as he cleaned the shoes and prayed for each person. Later on, Brengle became an inspiration to thousands. It's not likely any of us will have to clean shoes for subordinates today. What's more likely is that we'll encounter situations that would our pride or churn up resentment. We can turn any such experience into an opportunity for growth by praying to see God's hand in the matter and refusing to fight about it. The peace and serenity we feel is our reward, and, like Brengle, we'll become better people who can be of real service to others. Somebody may come to me today with something that makes my blood boil. I won't be a doormat, but I will remember that I always have the choice of making anything a positive experience.
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Keep It Simple
Whoever gossips to you will gossip about you. Spanish proverb Gossip can kill the trust in a Twelve Step program. We all need to feel safe when we share our personal lives with others. We need to know our private business won't spread around. We can do two things to help keep the trust in our groups, and in the rest of our lives too. First, don't gossip. Second, don't listen to gossip about others. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me mind my own business today. Help me honor the trust of my friends by not gossiping. Action for the Day: Today, I'll think of two ways to stop someone from telling me gossip. Then, I'll put those ways to use.
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Each Day a New Beginning
To keep your character intact you cannot stoop to filthy acts. It makes it easier to stoop the next time. --Katharine Hepburn Behaving the way we believe God wants us to behave sounds so easy on the surface. We don't willingly hurt others, do we? Or do we? . . . When did we last secretly burn with jealousy over another's good fortune or good looks? Has there been a time, recently, when we sulked for lack of attention . . . or perhaps picked a fight? We can simplify life from this moment forth. There is only one path to walk, one decision to make, in every instance, and all our burdens will be lifted, all our anxiety released. We can decide to act in good faith. We can be silent a moment with ourselves and let our inner guide direct our behavior, our words, our thoughts. Each of us knows, when we dare to let our spiritual nature reign, the right act in every case. Letting God choose our acts will ease our lives. No more obsessive confusion. No more regrets. No more immobility due to fear of wrong moves. Freedom is guaranteed when I depend on God to direct my behavior. Life's burdens are lifted. I will go forth today, doing God's will, and my Spirit will be light.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
The first principle of success is that you should never be angry. Even though your husband becomes unbearable and you have to leave him temporarily, you should, if you can, go without rancor. Patience and good temper are most necessary.
p. 111
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
At my first meeting that night the people fulfilled their responsibility--they made me feel welcome. I met others like me and it felt good. Maybe this thing was for real. So I went to another meeting, and I got the same feeling. Then another meeting. The tomorrows came and went, and to this day, I still haven't found it necessary to take another drink. That was well over six years ago.
p. 509
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
About two weeks later, Ed stole by night into an A.A. member's house, and unknown to the family, went to bed. Daylight found the master of the house and another friend drinking their morning coffee. A noise was heard on the stairs. To their consternation, Ed appeared. A quizzical smile on his lips, he said, "Have you fellows had your morning meditation?" They quickly sensed that he was quite in earnest. In fragments, his story came out.
p. 144
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"The real measure of your wealth is how much you'd be worth if you lost all your money." --Anonymous
When we practice loving kindness towards others, we run out of willingness and generosity quickly if we think it all has to come from us. When we understand that love comes through us, there is an endless Source. --Mary Manin Morrissey
"Don't worry that children never listen to you. Worry that they are always watching you." --Robert Fulghum, 20th-century American author
When we walk in God's light, we are transformed. --Eleanor Park Kammer
As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LAW
"The life of the law has not been logic; it has been experience." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Today I respect the law. In this way I respect the society in which I live. I am not "an island unto myself". I live in a community and have a responsibility to myself and that community --- such is sobriety.
For years I did what I wanted and tried not to be "found out". I was manipulative, dishonest and unhappy; to stay sick is depressing and exhausting.
Then I decided to remove the pain. I accepted the disease and began to "change" my life. I discovered the "spiritual law" of freedom with responsibility. Law is the collective experience of the many who choose to live a certain way, and today I choose to live amongst them. My understanding of spirituality involves respecting the laws that give me the dignity of citizenship.
O Lord, help me to see that in the laws of civilization is the gift of freedom.
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"I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will tell of all thy wonderful deeds. I will be glad and exult in thee, I will sing praise to thy name, O Most High." Psalm 9:1-2
"O God, you are my God, I seek you, my soul thirsts for you." Psalm 63:1
For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Ephesians 5:8-10
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Daily Inspiration
Never be too busy to pray. Lord, without Your presence in my life, today would be barren.
We don't choose how or when we will die, but we do decide how we will live. Lord, forgive my frequent drifting and help me to see clearly the best path for me.
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NA Just For Today
The Recovery Partnership
"As long as I take it easy and make a commitment with my Higher Power to do the best I can, I know I will be taken
care of today" Basic Text, p. 120
Many of us feel that our fundamental commitment in recovery is to our Higher Power. Knowing that we lack the power
to stay clean and find recovery on our own, we enter into a partnership with a Power greater than we are. We make a
commitment to live in the care of our Higher Power and, in return, our Higher Power guides us.
This partnership is vital to staying clean. Making it through the early days of recovery often feels like the hardest thing
we've ever done. But the strength of our commitment to recovery and the power of God's care is sufficient to carry us
through, just for today.
Our part in this partnership is to do the very best we can each day, showing up for life and doing what's put in front of
us, applying the principles of recovery to the best of our ability. We promise to do the best we can&151not to fake it,
not to pretend to be superhuman, but simply to do the footwork of recovery. In fulfilling our part of the recovery
partnership, we experience the care our Higher Power has provided us.
Just for today: I will honor my commitment to a partnership with my Higher Power.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. United souls are not satisfied with embraces, but desire to be truly each other. --Sir Thomas Browne If hugs could melt, if kisses were made of nothing but pure air, if talkers always agreed, and if hearts all beat to the
same drum, would we desire any longer to be truly each other? No two leaves on a tree turn the same way in the
wind; no two fish in a school tread the same water; and no two people can live the same life. Therefore, when we hug
let's leave some space; when we kiss let's allow each other to breathe; when we talk let's permit each other to
disagree; when we love let's honor each other's rhythm and way. Is it our similarities or differences that make us want to know each other better?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. Love can be its own reward. --Arnold Label The feeling of attachment, of being related, of caring about someone, is what life is all about. Before recovery, we may
have feared we could not love anyone. When we feel love, we may also feel cheated because our affections aren't
returned, as we want them to be. Or we may think relationships are just too complicated and painful. It's true that
relationships are difficult at times. The only thing more difficult is having none. In this quiet moment, let's reflect on our relationships. Close attachments to both men and women are essential to our
progress. Without them, we would not be in recovery. We don't need to say to our friends, "What have you done for
me?" We can feel an inner fullness and satisfaction, knowing we have relationships we truly care about and we are
accepted as we are. That alone is a remarkable reward. I appreciate the joys my relationships bring.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Being Right Recovery is not about being right; it's about allowing ourselves to be who we are and accepting others as they are. That concept can be difficult for many of us if we have lived in systems that functioned on the "right wrong" justice
scale. The person who was right was okay; the person who was wrong was shamed. All value and worth may have
depended on being right; to be wrong meant annihilation of self and self-esteem. In recovery, we are learning how to strive for love in our relationships, not superiority. Yes, we may need to make
decisions about people's behavior from time to time. If someone is hurting us, we need to stand up for ourselves. We
have a responsibility to set boundaries and take care of ourselves. But we do not need to justify taking care of
ourselves by condemning someone else. We can avoid the trap of focusing on others instead of ourselves. In recovery, we are learning that what we do needs to be right only for us. What others do is their business and needs
to be right only for them. It's tempting to rest in the superiority of being right and in analyzing other people's motives
and actions, but it's more rewarding to look deeper. Today, I will remember that I don't have to hide behind being right. I don't have to justify what I want and need with
saying something is "right" or "wrong." I can let myself be who I am.
Today I am establishing rapport with myself. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Your Body,Mind, and Soul Are One
The body, mind, spirit, and emotions are more than just connected. They are one. To nurture the body is to nurture the
mind, spirit, and emotions.To nurture the spirit is to nurture the body, mind, and emotions. And so it goes, a
continuous connection. A continuing whole.
Do you feel fragmented? Have you disowned a part of yourself? Invite it back. Maybe you’ve focused too heavily on
one part and neglected others. You can be a world-class athlete and still not be in touch with your soul. You can be
skilled at dealing with any emotion that comes along, and yet not see the delicate connection between that emotion
and your conscious thoughts and beliefs. Or you may be so focused on tending to the needs of your spirit and mind
that you neglect your body– resent it and think of it as a limitation.
Tend to each aspect of the whole. Do things that nurture your spirit, perhaps spend time in prayer and meditation or
time with nature. Work on what you believe; clarify the thoughts that run through your head. Nurture yourself
emotionally. Let yourself heal from the feelings of the past, and do what you need to stay current and clear. Listen to
your body and give it what it needs– it’s not separate and apart, it’s not a nuisance. It’s the form your spirit created to
experience the gift of life.
Find that place of balance in nurturing all parts of you. Then life will begin to be magical and you’ll see what you
believe. Your feelings won’t be a bother. They’ll fuel your life; they’ll be the passion that adds color and zest to your life.
Your body will lead you instinctively into what you want and away from what you dislike. And the longer you travel the
journey to the heart, the more you’ll discover and trust your soul.
Start by becoming connected. If you love yourself and keep walking your path, soon you’ll see how connected you are.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Remember how to play
We don’t stop playing because we get old, we get old because we stop playing. –Herbert Spencer
I was sitting in my back porch watching a group of children playing in the surf. As the waves came surging in, they
would turn to face the shore on their body boards and paddle like heck to try to catch the wave. I watched the surf
crash down on top of them, one by one. There would be nothing for a few moments but the torrent of water, and then
a little while later a green foam board would pop up and a little while later, a laughing head and body. They’d shriek and
laugh, then one by one turn around, go back out, and do it again.
Later toward sunset, I saw two gray-haired men in ocean kayaks paddling near the shore. They would wait for the
perfect wave and then paddle as hard as they could, trying to catch it and ride it into shore. Again I watched as the
waves reared up and crashed down on the little boats. A kayak would get pushed up on the beach, followed a few
moments later by a laughing gray-haired man, who would then paddle back out and do it again.
I have a friend in his thirties who is determined to make it. He doesn’t know where he’s going; he just knows that he is
going somewhere. And no, he doesn’t have time to go to a basketball game or Magic Mountain. He’s busy and doesn’t
have time to play.
I have a friend in his fifties. He’s in excellent health. He sits in his house, feeds the dog, and complains about the pain
and the shortness of life. He doesn’t play because his poor body just isn’t what it used to be.
We can play or we can not play. It doesn’t make any difference one way or another, except that at the end, you will
have had a much more enjoyable time if you did.
God, help me start having some fun.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We learn in The Program that we cannot punish anyone without punishing ourselves. The release of my tensions,
even justified, in a punishing way leaves behind the dregs of bitterness and pain. This was the monotonous story of
my life before I came to The Program. So in my new life,k I’d do well to consider the long-range benefits of simply
owning my emotions, naming them and thus releasing them. Does the voice of God have a chance to be heard over
my reproachful shouting.?
Today I Pray
May I avoid name-calling, ego-crushing exchanges. If I am angry, may I try to assign my anger to what someone did
instead of what someone is. May I refrain from downgrading, lashing out at character flaws of mindless abuse. May I
count on my Higher Power to show me the way.
Today I Will Remember
Tod deal with anger appropriately.
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One More Day
Self pity is our worst enemy and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in this world. – Helen Keller
Pity, either from ourselves or others, harms us. yet, sometimes, we allow it to happen.
What we really need from others is empathy — for them to feel as if they were in our shoes. Pity can be a deep pit to
fall into, and the climb back out is difficult. We can’t begin to make the ascent until we are fully aware of why we have
allowed pity and self-pity to prevail. Maybe feeling sorry for ourselves has been easier than encountering the frustration
that may come when we make an effort.
The actions I take today will be based on growth for myself and will help me avoid self-pity.
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One Day At A Time
SERENITY
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference. The Serenity Prayer
My life before abstinence was a fight in the dark to stabilize my world and protect myself from more pain. Too much
suffering was endured by this child. She never understood that she could ever come back into the Light. But, the fog is
lifting now ... there are days of clarity and joy. How could she have known? She was too little.
Circumstances change ... memories fade away ... I can be safe again ... I can allow myself to be me. I will work my
program to secure the Light again in my world.
One day at a time . . . I pray to understand that the stream of life keeps moving ... I will live in darkness no longer. Margaret ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
An illness of this sort -- and we have come to believe it an illness -- involves those about us in a way no other human sickness can. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It often happens that you won't know the role addiction played in your life until you stop using. You have replace roles now. Learning new skills, and this is done at meetings and with your sponsor, is a necessary step in adjusting to your new circumstances.
Rather than see additional burdens in new tasks, I choose to see them as a breath of new life.
Courage
I will develop the courage necessary to meet life. I cannot possibly meet the challenges of my life without courage. Today I understand that courage is something I develop. Each time I go through an experience that stretches me, each time I hold my own feet to the fire, each time I discipline myself and hold myself to a slightly higher standard than before, I grow inside, I get a little bit stronger, I strengthen my own courage to meet the next challenge.
I will I will grow in courage
- Tian Dayton PhD
Courage
I will develop the courage necessary to meet life. I cannot possibly meet the challenges of my life without courage. Today I understand that courage is something I develop. Each time I go through an experience that stretches me, each time I hold my own feet to the fire, each time I discipline myself and hold myself to a slightly higher standard than before, I grow inside, I get a little bit stronger, I strengthen my own courage to meet the next challenge.
I will I will grow in courage
- Tian Dayton PhD
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
'Choice, not chance, determines destiny.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
'Today I am establishing rapport with myself' - Peter Vegso
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Early in recovery. I heard Aldous Huxley give a lecture. Afterwards I went up to him, I had an AA pin on my lapel and he spotted it and he was ebullient and said;'I'm a friend of Bill W!' I didn't know Bill W, so I said: Mr. Huxley, what is God? and with this grin, he said; 'God is the inner experience of principles applied.' I said: ' Yeah...maybe you, didn't understand the question.' He said; 'You have a program, if you will apply those Steps, one day at a time, in your life, you will eventually have inner experiences that can't come about any other way. Then you won't have to ask that question because you will have the experience.' - Eddie C.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 19, 2017 23:15:12 GMT -5
February 19
Daily Reflections
I'M NOT DIFFERENT
In the beginning, it was four whole years before A.A. brought permanent sobriety to even one alcoholic woman. Like the "high bottoms, " the women said they were different; . . . The Skid-Rower said he was different . . . so did the artists and the professional people, the rich, the poor, the religious, the agnostic, the Indians and the Eskimos, the veterans, and the prisoners. . . . nowadays all of these, and legions more, soberly talk about how very much alike all of us alcoholics are when we admit that the chips are finally down. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 24
I cannot consider myself "different" in A.A.; if I do I isolate myself from others and from contact with my Higher Power. If I feel isolated in A.A., it is not something for which others are responsible. It is something I've created by feeling I'm "different" in some way. Today I practice being just another alcoholic in the worldwide Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Many things we do in A.A. are in preparation for that crucial moment when, walking down the street on a nice sunshiny day, we see a nice cool thingytail lounge and the idea of having a drink pops into our minds. If we've trained our minds so that we're well prepared for that crucial moment, we won't take that first drink. In other words, if we've done our A.A. homework well, we won't slip when temptation comes. In preparation for that crucial moment when I'll be tempted, will I keep in mind the fact that liquor is my enemy?
Meditation For The Day
How many of the world's prayers have gone unanswered because those who prayed did not endure to the end? They thought it was too late, that they must act for themselves, that God was not going to guide them. "He that endureth to the end, the same shall be saved." Can I endure to the very end? If so, I shall be saved. I will try to endure with courage. If I endure, God will unlock those secret spiritual treasures that are hidden from those who do not endure to the end.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may follow God's guidance, so that spiritual success shall be mine. I pray that I may never doubt the power of God and so take things into my own hands.
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As Bill Sees It
A.A.: Benign Anarchy and Democracy, p. 50
When we come into A.A. we find a greater personal freedom than any other society knows. We cannot be compelled to do anything. In that sense our Society is a benign anarchy. The word "anarchy" has a bad meaning to most of us. But I think that the idealist who first advocated the concept felt that if only men were granted absolute liberty, and were compelled to obey no one, they would then voluntarily associate themselves in the common interest. A.A. is an association of the benign sort he envisioned.
But when we had to go into action--to function as groups--we discovered that we also had to become a democracy. As our oldtimers retired, we therefore began to elect our trusted servants by majority vote. Each group in this sense became a town meeting. All plans for group action had to be approved by the majority. This meant that no single individual could appoint himself to act for his group or for A.A. as a whole. Neither dictatorship nor paternalism was for us.
A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 224-225
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Walk In Dry Places
Sticking with the winners____Prudence "Stick with the winners," newcomers are told at Twelve Step meetings. The real message of this statement is to share the attitudes and actions of people who are successful in living sober. No recovering person can have a successful day while dwelling on ideas that can be harmful. We'll meet people in the course of the day whose attitudes may appall us. We may work with people who are critical, gossipy, or resentful. It's not our duty to correct them or argue with them. We're wise, however, not to accept what we recognize as wrong thinking. Winners, in AA terms, are people who seek sobriety first and live up to the principles of the program. Seem them out for help in doing likewise. I'll try to associate with people who exemplify the highest and best in good attitudes.
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Keep It Simple
Changing brings questions, and questions bring change. ---Anonymous What am I becoming? How do I know if what I'm doing is right? Is it best for me? We are full of questions. Often, times of question a are times of change. We are becoming something new, and there is always a little fear of change. Luckily, we don't need to know what we are becoming to find peace. What we need to know is what we believe in. And we'll become what we believe in. If we believe in sobriety, we'll be sober. If we believe in honestly, we'll struggle to be more honest. We must give ourselves the freedom of becoming. Becoming means we're on a trip, a journey. Over time, becoming takes on a comfort of its own. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, what am I becoming? I give up having to know the answer. All I need to believe is that You love me and will do what is best for me. Action for the Day: I'll ask lots of questions. Often, the question is more important than the answer.
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Each Day a New Beginning
No trumpets sound when the important decisions of our life are made. Destiny is made known silently. --Agnes DeMille The day ahead offers us choices of many kinds--some big ones, many that will affect other persons close to us, a few that will have profound effects on our destiny. But no choice, no decision we make, will be wrong. A particular decision may lead us slightly astray. Down a dead-end path perhaps--but we can always turn back and choose again. We are seldom aware of the gravity of a particular choice at the time of making it. Only hindsight reveals the wisdom of an important choice. Nevertheless, no choice is without importance in the overall picture of our lives. And at the same time, no choice is all-powerful regarding our destiny. We are offered chances again and again for making the right choices, the ones that will most contribute to the bigger plan for our lives. I need not worry about today's opportunities for decision-making. I will listen to those around me. I will seek guidance in the messages coming to me. I will make the choices I need to, today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Our next thought is that you should never tell him what he must do about his drinking. If he gets the idea that you are a nag or a killjoy, your chance of accomplishing anything useful may be zero. He will use that as an excuse to drink more. He will tell you he is misunderstood. This may lead to lonely evenings for you. He may seek someone else to console him - not always another man.
p. 111
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
The meetings gave me what my sponsor likes to call one of the most important words in the Big Book: A.A. put a "we" in my life. "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol. . . ." I no longer had to be alone. Fellowship and activity kept me coming back long enough to work the Twelve Steps. The more I did, the better I felt. I started hanging out with my sponsor and some active people at the meetings. They showed me how gratitude is something that is demonstrated, not talked about--gratitude is action. They suggested I was lucky to still have a car, even though it was a junker; therefore, I might consider taking the less fortunate to meetings. They reminded me you can't teach anything to a know-it-all, so remain teachable. When old behaviors started to creep back in, they called me on it. When life just didn't feel right, they talked about developing faith and relying on my Higher Power. They told me lack of power was my dilemma and that there is a solution. I took to A.A. immediately and believed like a child that if I leveled my pride enough to thoroughly follow their path, I'd get what they had. And it worked. Starting out, I just wanted to keep the authorities off my back. I never bargained for this program's changing the course of my life or showing me the way to freedom and happiness.
p. 510
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
In a neighboring state, Ed had holed up in a cheap hotel. After all his pleas for help had been rebuffed, these words rang in his fevered mind. "They have deserted me. I have been deserted by my own kind. This is the end . . . Nothing is left." As he tossed on his bed, his hand brushed the bureau near by, touching a book. Opening the book, he read. It was a Gideon Bible. Ed never confided any more of what he saw and felt in that hotel room. It was the year 1938. He hasn't had a drink since.
pp. 144-145
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"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen nor touched... but are felt in the heart. --Hellen Keller
"It is awfully important to know what is and what is not your business." --Gertrude Stein
We need to let the old go, so the new can emerge. --Peggy Bassett
The more I force things, the tougher my life gets. --Helen Neujahr
My daily choice is to rise and shine or rise and whine. --Anonymous
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PREJUDICE
"The chief cause of human errors is to be found in the prejudices picked up in childhood." -- Rene Descartes
During the past few years I have begun to recognize how many of my prejudices were planted in childhood. Family, teachers, priests and "the neighborhood" passed on to me prejudices: " The Jews are bad because they killed Jesus." "Blacks are inferior to white people --- but you should be kind to them." "Women should obey the man of the house." "Gays are child molesters." "People who do not accept Jesus will not go to Heaven." "Sex is for having babies and you should not enjoy it."
Today I live with the problem of knowing that these statements are untrue but a part of me is still affected by them.
Today my spiritual program demands that I expose prejudice for the "hate-mail" that it is, and try to pass on to the next generation the joy that comes from love, acceptance and freedom.
Let the children grow in freedom.
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"For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'Plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me when you seek for me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13
The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in Him. The LORD is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh Him. Lamentations 3:24-25
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Daily Inspiration
Joy is left if you rid your heart of all that pulls you down. Lord, help me to heal my spirit and grow from today's experiences.
You have a responsibility to be the best that you can be. Lord, may I find a good balance in my life so that I neither neglect myself and my duties nor my responsibility to those that need or depend on me.
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NA Just For Today
Reservations
"Relapse is never an accident. Relapse is a sign that we have a reservation in our program." Basic Text, p. 76
A reservation is something we set aside for future use. In our case, a reservation is the expectation that, if such-and- such happens, we will surely relapse. What event do we expect will be too painful to bear? Maybe we think that if a spouse or lover leaves us, we will have to get high. If we lose our job, surely, we think, we will use. Or maybe it's the death of a loved one that we expect to be unbearable. In any case, the reservations we harbor give us permission to use when they come true-as they often do. We can prepare ourselves for success instead of relapse by examining our expectations and altering them where we can. Most of us carry within us a catalog of anticipated misery closely related to our fears. We can learn how to survive pain by watching other members live through similar pain. We can apply their lessons to our own expectations. Instead of telling ourselves we will have to get high if this happens, we can quietly reassure ourselves that we, too, can stay clean through whatever life brings us today. Just for today: I will check for any reservations that may endanger my recovery and share them with another addict.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I have often thought morality may perhaps consist solely in the courage of making a choice. --Leon Blum Sometimes, trying to do the right thing isn't easy because it isn't what we want to do. For instance, we may want to sneak a cookie to take to bed with us, or we may want to stay out late. But is that the right thing to do? One way to tell is to think how we'll feel after we've done it. Will we be happy, or will we feel guilty because we know in our hearts it is wrong? On the other hand, how would we feel if we resisted the temptation? Perhaps we'd feel great because we'd know in our hearts we'd done the right thing. And don't we deserve to feel good about ourselves? Of course we do! How wonderful it is that our feelings can help us do the right thing when we're in doubt. Will I have the courage to follow my true feelings today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. He who has a why to live can bear with almost any how. --Friedrich Nietzsche Our sense of purpose in life is not fixed in concrete. It changes from youth through all the stages of life. Often in the transitions to a new growth stage we are most confused. In the chaotic life created by our own addictive or codependent thinking, all meaning collapses around us. At these times we wonder, "What is the point?" "Does anything really matter?" We receive a why for our existence by participating in the whole of this world. We are sons, or fathers, or husbands, or brothers, or friends to very specific people - and to the rest of our community, extending to all of creation. Our sense of purpose may change when life circumstances change. We get married, for instance, and then say, "Now what?" Or a child is born, or a parent dies, or we become disabled. Each time we may be confronted again with the questions. Being open to contact with our world, keeping our barriers down so we stay in touch, restores our awareness of purpose. May I continue to respond to the changing phases in life - and be open to the renewal of purpose, which is here for me.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Our Path I just spent several hours with someone from my group, and I feel like I'm losing my mind. This woman insisted that the only way I would make progress in my program was to go to her church and succumb to her religious rules. She pushed and insisted, and insisted and pushed. She's been in the program so much longer than I have. I kept thinking that she must know what she's talking about. But it didn't feel right. And now I feel crazy, afraid, guilty, and ashamed. - -Anonymous The spiritual path and growth promised to us by the Twelve Steps does not depend on any religious belief. They are not contingent upon any denomination or sect. They are not, as the traditions of Twelve Step programs state, affiliated with any religious denomination or organization. We do not have to allow anyone to badger us about religion in recovery. We do not have to allow people to make us feel ashamed, afraid, or less than because we do not subscribe to their beliefs about religion. We do not have to let them do it to us in the name of God, love, or recovery. The spiritual experience we will find as a result of recovery and the Twelve Steps will be our own spiritual experience.
It will be a relationship with God, a Higher Power, as we understand God. Each of us must find our own spiritual path. Each of us must build our own relationship with God, as we understand God. Each of us needs a Power greater than ourselves. These concepts are critical to recovery. So is the freedom to choose how to do that. Higher Power, help me know that I don't have to allow anyone to shame or badger me into religious beliefs. If they confuse that with the spirituality available in recovery, help me give their issue back to them. Help me discover and develop my own spirituality, a path that works for me. Guide me, with Divine Wisdom, as I grow spiritually.
Today I will be aware not to judge myself when I feel less than perfect. I am beginning to love myself just as I am and
that feels so nice. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Be Gentle with Your Heart On this road, this journey to the heart, you will see more, feel more, and be more than you’ve ever been before. Your heart is open, your spirit is alive. You’re open to all that the universe, life, and God hold for you. Because you’re that open, you are more sensitive than ever to people, energies, places, things. You are more sensitive to any unresolved issues in yourself and in those around you. You are open, more open that you’ve ever been. Comfort yourself. Wrap yourself up in a blanket of love and hope. Know that you will be feeling, seeing, and taking in a great deal. Know that you will be healing at a deeper level than ever before. Most of the time, this will bring joy. But an open heart is not one-dimensional, joy is not the only emotion it will embrace. Make room in your heart, room in your life, and time in your days to feel other feelings,too– anger, grief, fear, exuberance, tenderness, betrayal, and exhilaration– all the emotions an open heart feels. You’re more open than you’ve ever been. Take gentle, loving care of yourself. Be tender with your heart.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Make your own fun My house renovation project was way behind schedule. Spring was right around the corner. Stress was a pounding ache in the back of my head. Then we went to the toy store. “Oh, these will be great,” he said, grabbing two Nerf guns off the shelf. “And how about a bow-and-arrow set,too?” When we got home, we took some markers and drew a big target on the wall in the living room. We started shooting at it, but soon grew tired of that game and started shooting at each other instead. A friend walked in the front door. We shot him. Two in the belly and one to the forehead. He threw me into the hot tub. And I forgot that the ceiling wasn’t done, and that the walls weren’t painted, and that the carpet would have to be delayed. That night we had a barbecue, and our friends took out the markers and drew pictures of themselves, their experiences, and their hopes on the unpainted walls of the house that was behind schedule. And we laughed, and no one cared that the house was unlivable. We can’t always control the timing of our plans, but we can have fun along the way. Friends don’t care if the project is finished; they just want to be a part of the magic of life. Look at things from a new perspective. Laugh. Be grateful you’re where you are at this moment. Don’t worry about trying to hurry the future along. Look for the joy in life now. Maybe a visit to the toy store would help you,too. God, if I can’t see the joy in life, help me look again.
Activity: Go to the toy store today. But something that appeals to you, or buy something ridiculous– a twirl-o-paint, an Erector set, a game of Operation, a bead-o-matic. Break out of your mold; look at life from a new perspective. Learn how to play, again.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When a person says something rash or ugly, we sometimes say they are “forgetting themselves,” meaning they’re forgetting heir best selves in a sudden outburst of uncontrolled fury. If I remember the kind of person I want to be,m hopefully I won’t “forget myself” and yield to a fit of temper. I’ll believe that the positive always defeats the negative: courage over comes fear; patience overcomes anger and irritability; love overcomes hatred. Am I always striving for improvement?
Today I Pray
Today I ask that God, to Whom all things are possible, help me turn negatives into positives — anger into super- energy, fear into a chance to be courageous, hatred into love. May I take time out of remember examples of such positive-groom-negative transformations from the whole of my lifetime. Uppermost is God’s miracle; my freedom from the slavery of addiction.
Today I Will Remember Turn negatives into positives.
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One More Day
Arriving at one goal is the starting point to another. – John Dewey
Accepting change is our lives is the basis of growth. To often, we’ve seen marks are razed, friends move away or die, we become ill.
Eventually, we come to see change in a different light. For good or bad, or weather we approve or don’t approve, change will happen. The only thing we can control is our reaction to it. Change that is progress or growth, such as old landmarks disappearing and new ones being built or friends becoming involved in self-help groups, can be welcomed.
Other changes which can’t be greeted with enthusiasm — losing friends or becoming ill — can at least be seen as random, not personal, consequences of human life. With this frame of mind, we are able to accept the challenges demanded of us.
Changes in my life can encourage growth.
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One Day At A Time
~ SELF KNOWLEDGE ~
We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves. Tom Robbins
I always tried to do my best in everything I did. Studies, school, and managing my own family are some good examples. Being in control made it seem as though I always did as I was told, but I had a very difficult time Being on my own and thinking for myself. The talent I was born with gave me a good start at being an artist, but I couldn't seem to make a successful career out of it. I was scared and shy and didn't dare be on the forefront of making this talent into what I wanted it to be.
When I started on my path to Recovery, I found that I was being too much of a perfectionist. I was always told to do things perfectly and I tried and tried but never seemed to satisfy my parents or the god of my childhood. So when I grew up I was so hard on myself that I lost the creativity I was born with. Creativity can't thrive in a hostile environment.
One day while reading an author I liked, I read that I had to "get out of my own way". I was a dragon trying to do something creative and it didn't work. I have to learn to "rescue myself from myself" so I can do my art with the talents that are God-given.
One day at a time ... I realize that if I want to see myself as I really am,I cannot stand in my own shadow. ~ Myrlene ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The alcoholic may find it hard to re-establish friendly relations with his children. Their young minds were impressionable while he was drinking. Without saying so, they may cordially hate him for what he has done to them and to their mother. The children are sometimes dominated by a pathetic hardness and cynicism. - Pg. 134 - The Family Afterward
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is easier for us to blame others (parents, spouses, friends) for our addiction then it is to look at self. We must never forget that we drank that drink, snorted that coke, toked that joint, and took that fix. US. 'They' didn't do it. May I never forget that I used too many mind affecting chemicals because I have the disease of addiction! Other reasons are not causes. Everyone has problems yet not everyone suffers from addiction.
Empowering My Own Day There are no victims, only volunteers. If there is something I don't like in the way things are going for me, I will see what I can change. I can change the subject if someone goes on and on about things that I don't want to talk about. I can change my routines and trade un-nourishing ones for nourishing ones, I can set boundaries with my time. My time is precious to me, it is all I have to call my very own. I won't throw it away and then blame someone else. I have a right to protect the quiet and pleasure in my day, to do more of those things that give me pleasure and fewer of things that run me down. If I am living up to my responsibilities, that is enough. I won't throw my time away with both hands - Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Half measures do not avail us half, they avail us nothing. Am I willing to go to any length?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know that I am doing the best that I can and I will be gentle with myself. I will watch what comes without struggle and will accept what is and adjust myself to it, rather than wanting it to be different than it is.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The difference between God and me is that God doesn't think he's me. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 19, 2017 23:16:30 GMT -5
February 20
Daily Reflections
THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER
At this juncture, his A.A. sponsor usually laughs. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 26
Before my recovery from alcoholism began, laughter was one of the most painful sounds I knew. I never laughed and I felt that anyone else's laughter was directed at me! My self-pity and anger denied me the simplest of pleasures or lightness of heart. By the end of my drinking not even alcohol could provoke a drunken giggle in me. When my A.A. sponsor began to laugh and point out my self-pity and ego-feeding deceptions, I was annoyed and hurt, but it taught me to lighten up and focus on my recovery. I soon learned to laugh at myself and eventually I taught those I sponsor to laugh also. Every day I ask God to help me stop taking myself too seriously.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Liquor used to be my friend. I used to have a lot of fun drinking. Practically all the fun I had was connected with drinking. But the time came when liquor became my enemy. I don't know just when liquor turned against me and became my enemy, but I know it happened, because I began to get into trouble. And since I realize that liquor is now my enemy, my main business now is keeping sober. Making a living or keeping a house is no longer my main business. It's secondary to the business of keeping sober. Do I realize that my main business is keeping sober?
Meditation For The Day
I can depend on God to supply me with all the power I need to face any situation, provided that I will sincerely believe in that power and honestly ask for it, at the same time making all my life conform to what I believe God wants me to be. I can come to God as a business manager would come to the owner of the business, knowing that to lay the matter before Him means immediate cooperation, provided the matter has merit.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may believe that God is ready and willing to supply me with all that I need. I pray that I may ask only for faith and strength to meet any situation.
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As Bill Sees It
The Coming Of Faith, p. 51
In my own case, the foundation stone of freedom from fear is that of faith: a faith that, despite all worldly appearances to the contrary, causes me to believe that I live in a universe that makes sense.
To me, this means a belief in a Creator who is all power, justice, and love; a God who intends for me a purpose, a meaning, and a destiny to grow, however little and haltingly, toward His own likeness and image. Before the coming of faith I had lived as an alien in a cosmos that too often seemed both hostile and cruel. In it there could be no inner security for me.
<< << << >> >> >>
"When I was driven to my knees by alcohol, I was made ready to ask for the gift of faith. And all was changed. Never again, my pains and problems notwithstanding, would I experience my former desolation. I saw the universe to be lighted by God's love; I was alone no more."
1. Grapevine, January 1962 2. Letter, 1966
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Walk In Dry Places
A day of Acceptance Releasing the Past "We will not regret the past nor fear the future," goes one of the promises in Twelve Step programs. Neither the past nor the future should control what we're thinking and doing today. After all, if our higher power is everything, no person or action can be outside of this supreme control. Today, I will rise above anything that was said or done in the past. I will also hold the idea that the future is bright with promise, and that this promise will be fulfilled. Nobody's opinion or criticism can be unsettling to me if my beliefs and self-worth are anchored in my Higher Power. It's true that there might have been lots of wreckage in the past…. Even more recently when we have been living sober. It doesn't matter. I amazing ways, our higher power sometimes turns negative conditions into future benefits. This was actually what happened when our compulsive condition led directly to a new way of life. I will accept life today and will look for unexpected blessings. No person or group can keep me from good as I accept God's direction in my life. "In all your ways acknowledge [God who] shall direct your paths." I'll remember this frequently as I go about the day.
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Keep It Simple
Let Go and Let God.---Twelve Step slogan Some days we might ask ourselves, Is it worth it? We feel alone. No one seems to care. Life seems hard. Recovery seems hard. This is when we need to slow down and take a look at what's going on. We're feeling this way because we're off our recovery path. We may be back into wanting people to see things our way. We want control. Remember, all problems are not our problems. All work is not our work. We can't have everything the way we want it. But we can do our part and let go of the rest. Than we can feel better. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me remember my only work today is to do Your will for me. It is not my job to be You. Action for the Day: I'll talk with my sponsor or a program friend today. I'll talk about how to deal with things that seems to pull me down.
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Each Day a New Beginning
No trumpets sound when the important decisions of our life are made. Destiny is made known silently. --Agnes DeMille The day ahead offers us choices of many kinds--some big ones, many that will affect other persons close to us, a few that will have profound effects on our destiny. But no choice, no decision we make, will be wrong. A particular decision may lead us slightly astray. Down a dead-end path perhaps--but we can always turn back and choose again. We are seldom aware of the gravity of a particular choice at the time of making it. Only hindsight reveals the wisdom of an important choice. Nevertheless, no choice is without importance in the overall picture of our lives. And at the same time, no choice is all-powerful regarding our destiny. We are offered chances again and again for making the right choices, the ones that will most contribute to the bigger plan for our lives. I need not worry about today's opportunities for decision-making. I will listen to those around me. I will seek guidance in the messages coming to me. I will make the choices I need to, today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Be determined that your husband's drinking is not going to spoil your relations with your children or your friends. They need your companionship and your help. It is possible to have a full and useful life, though your husband continues to drink. We know women who are unafraid, even happy under these conditions. Do not set your heart on reforming your husband. You may be unable to do so, no matter how hard you try.
p. 111
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
Still very impatient, I wanted the whole deal right away. That's why I related so well to the story about a wide-eyed new person and an oldtimer, envying his accomplishments and many years of sobriety, the oldtimer slapped down his hand like a gavel and said' "I'll trade you even! My thirty years for your thirty days--right now!" He knew what the newcomer had yet to find out: that true happiness is found in the journey, not the destination.
pp. 510-511
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Nowadays, when oldtimers who know Ed foregather, they exclaim, "What if we had actually succeeded in throwing Ed out for blasphemy? What would have happened to him and all the others he later helped?" So the hand of Providence early gave us a sign that any alcoholic is a member of our Society when he says so.
p. 145
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God, please help me let go of my expectations and accept the gifts that you give me each day, knowing that there is beauty and wonder in each act of life. --Melody Beattie
"Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile." --Mother Theresa
"Life has a way of creating roadblocks that end up as building blocks in our lives." --Doug Firebaugh
"Turn your troubles into treasures. Learn from them and grow from them." --Mark Victor Hansen
Teaching is the best way to learn. Leading by example is the best way to teach.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CHRISTIANITY
"Going to Church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to the garage makes you a car." -- Laurence J. Peter
I cannot help but believe that the truth of Christianity is about bringing the world and mankind together, rather than creating divisions and resentments. It must be much bigger than what we do or say in any building. Christ's truth seeks to discover God in the splendor of His varied world. In this sense, Christianity is an aspect of the world's spirituality!
My addiction made me a small man with a small god. Constantly focusing on the differences in the world stopped me from seeing the glaring similarities; my exclusiveness kept me a lonely man. The world of black and white, rather than shades of creative color, is a sick and dangerous world to live in. Jesus Christ reveals for me the "man for others"; the bridge by which reconciliation and harmony can be achieved. His message for me is not so much a series of dogmas as a revealed journey into Truth.
In the created stranger, help me to discover the friend.
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But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
"His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness." 2 Peter 1:3
"A cheerful heart is good medicine..." Proverb 17:22a
"Protect me, O God, for in you I take refuge." Psalm 16:1
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Daily Inspiration
Prayer helps us see that God is not the cause of unpleasant happenings, but the healing of them. Lord, I trust in You for the right outcomes in all situations.
Each day is new! Each day is an opportunity to start again and be our best selves. Lord, silence my old ways of thinking, my old habits, and my old tapes inside my head.
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NA Just For Today
Powerlessness, Personal Responsibility
"Through our inability to accept personal responsibilities, we were actually creating our own problems." Basic Text, p. 13
When we refuse to take responsibility for our lives, we give away all of our personal power. We need to remember that we are powerless over our addiction, not our personal behavior. Many of us have misused the concept of powerlessness to avoid making decisions or to hold onto things we had outgrown. We have claimed powerlessness over our own actions. We have blamed others for our circumstances rather than taking positive action to change those circumstances. If we continue to avoid responsibility by claiming that we are "powerless;" we set ourselves up for the same despair and misery we experienced in our active addiction. The potential for spending our recovery years feeling like victims is very real. Instead of living our lives by default, we can learn how to make responsible choices and take risks. We may make mistakes, but we can learn from these mistakes. A heightened awareness of ourselves and an increased willingness to accept personal responsibility gives us the freedom to change, to make choices, and to grow.
Just for today: My feelings, actions, and choices are mine. I will accept responsibility for them.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I have often thought morality may perhaps consist solely in the courage of making a choice. --Leon Blum Sometimes, trying to do the right thing isn't easy because it isn't what we want to do. For instance, we may want to sneak a cookie to take to bed with us, or we may want to stay out late. But is that the right thing to do? One way to tell is to think how we'll feel after we've done it. Will we be happy, or will we feel guilty because we know in our hearts it is wrong? On the other hand, how would we feel if we resisted the temptation? Perhaps we'd feel great because we'd know in our hearts we'd done the right thing. And don't we deserve to feel good about ourselves? Of course we do! How wonderful it is that our feelings can help us do the right thing when we're in doubt. Will I have the courage to follow my true feelings today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. He who has a why to live can bear with almost any how. --Friedrich Nietzsche Our sense of purpose in life is not fixed in concrete. It changes from youth through all the stages of life. Often in the transitions to a new growth stage we are most confused. In the chaotic life created by our own addictive or codependent thinking, all meaning collapses around us. At these times we wonder, "What is the point?" "Does anything really matter?" We receive a why for our existence by participating in the whole of this world. We are sons, or fathers, or husbands, or brothers, or friends to very specific people - and to the rest of our community, extending to all of creation. Our sense of purpose may change when life circumstances change. We get married, for instance, and then say, "Now what?" Or a child is born, or a parent dies, or we become disabled. Each time we may be confronted again with the questions. Being open to contact with our world, keeping our barriers down so we stay in touch, restores our awareness of purpose. May I continue to respond to the changing phases in life - and be open to the renewal of purpose, which is here for me.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Our Path I just spent several hours with someone from my group, and I feel like I'm losing my mind. This woman insisted that the only way I would make progress in my program was to go to her church and succumb to her religious rules. She pushed and insisted, and insisted and pushed. She's been in the program so much longer than I have. I kept thinking that she must know what she's talking about. But it didn't feel right. And now I feel crazy, afraid, guilty, and ashamed. - -Anonymous The spiritual path and growth promised to us by the Twelve Steps does not depend on any religious belief. They are not contingent upon any denomination or sect. They are not, as the traditions of Twelve Step programs state, affiliated with any religious denomination or organization. We do not have to allow anyone to badger us about religion in recovery. We do not have to allow people to make us feel ashamed, afraid, or less than because we do not subscribe to their beliefs about religion. We do not have to let them do it to us in the name of God, love, or recovery. The spiritual experience we will find as a result of recovery and the Twelve Steps will be our own spiritual experience. It will be a relationship with God, a Higher Power, as we understand God. Each of us must find our own spiritual path. Each of us must build our own relationship with God, as we understand
God. Each of us needs a Power greater than ourselves. These concepts are critical to recovery. So is the freedom to choose how to do that. Higher Power, help me know that I don't have to allow anyone to shame or badger me into religious beliefs. If they confuse that with the spirituality available in recovery, help me give their issue back to them. Help me discover and develop my own spirituality, a path that works for me. Guide me, with Divine Wisdom, as I grow spiritually.
Today I will be aware not to judge myself when I feel less than perfect. I am beginning to love myself just as I am and
that feels so nice. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Spread Your Wings and Fly I sat on the ground on a dirt road that wandered off a main highway in Idaho. I leaned against a tree and watched a mother eagle and her babies in a nest overhead. She fussed as she protected them, watching me closely, responding with her call to any noise she heard. She was very protective now, but someday it would be time to push them out of the nest. It would be time to teach them to fly.
Many of us have been pushed out of the nest. Something unexpected happened, and our world changed. We may have fought valiantly to get back in the nest, to return to the safety of life as we knew it. But life had pushed us out. We had no choice but to flap our wings and learn to fly the best we could. See how magical this time has been? See how much you’ve learned? With all our fears and resistance, it has still been a grand and powerful time. You flailed around a bit, wondering who to trust. You tried to trust others, then found that didn’t work. Finally you understood. The very lesson you were learning was that of trusting yourself. You were learning to listen to and trust your inner voice. You were learning to open your heart. Despite all your fears, you have done a grand job. Look how much you’ve changed.
See all the powers you’ve gained? You’ve opened up to your healing powers, your creative powers,too. You know and sense things in a way that used to seem beyond reach and now seems both magical and commonplace. Your instincts and intuition are finely tuned. Your inner voice is clear. And despite all your fears about being abandoned, you now see how much you are loved.
When life pokes and prods you, it’s not punishment or abuse. You’re being pushed out of the nest. Spread your wings and take flight. See how well you can fly.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Take a side road
Adventures don’t begin until you get into the forest. That first step in an act of faith. –Micky Hart
We were driving along highway 166 in central California on another road trip. The trip had been a long one, started on the spur of the moment, as they usually are, and now we were anxious to get back home. Then we– Andy, Chip, and I– all saw it: a small road leading up into the mountains behind an open gate. It wasn’t on the atlas. The road turned to dirt. Cows lounged on the path and we had to wait for them to move out of the way. The GPS (Global Positioning System) got lost. The path degraded. We hit a patch of black mud and the truck struggled for a moment. Chipster gunned the motor and we leapt ahead. “Think we should turn around?” he asked. “No, this road must go somewhere,” said Andy. “Aaaah,” I said. We came to a small lake in the middle of the path. “You can make it,” said Andy, rolling up his window. “Aaaah,” I said. Chip switched into four-wheel drive and gunned the motor. Muddy water poured in through the open sunroof. Much later– after we moved rocks out of the way, splashed through more puddles, saw stunning views from a high ridgeline, and drove far too close to the edge of the cliff– we came across an old man pushing a bicycle up the road. We asked, “How much further is it to get out of here?” “Well,” he replied, “how far in have you come?” “We didn’t come in this way.” A puzzled look crossed his face. “How did you get here then?” “We drove over the ridge.” He shook his head in disbelief and walked on. Ten miles later we came to another gate. The cell phone started to work again. The GPS decided that we were still on the planet after all. Sometimes, we find the biggest adventures when we deviate from the map and drive through the gate into new territory just to see where it goes. God, help me remember that I don’t have to follow the map all the time. Give me the spirit of adventure. Bring a little woohoo into my life.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We are often told in The Program that “more will be revealed.” As we are restored to health and become increasingly able to lve comfortably in the real world without using chemicals, we begin to see many things in a new light. Many of us have come to realize, for example, that our arch enemy, anger, comes disguised in many shapes and colors: intolerance, contempt, snobbishness, rigidity, tension, sarcasm, distrust, anxiety, envy, hatred, cynicism, discontent, self-pity, malice, suspicion, jealousy. Do I let my feelings get the best of me?
Today I Pray
May I recognize that my anger, like dancer at a masquerade, wears many forms of many faces. May I strip off it’s several masks and know it for what it is.
Today I Will Remember
Anger wears a thousand masks.
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One More Day
This is a delicious evening, when the whole body is one sense and imbibes delight through every pore. – Henry David Thoreau
We carry the memory of a soft spring rain within us even in a dry season. We remember the pungent fragrance of new mow grass, the chirping of crickets, the singing of birds. Such memories are important to us, but we’re increasingly determined to also create new ones. It takes some planning on our part to get out, but we know the experience is worth the effort. Our mobility maybe limited, or we might not be living in a place where we can commune with nature as easily as we did when we were younger. But we’re creative and find the joy of outdoors, on the stoop of our building or on a park bench. Zoos, nature preserves, and public parks give us a areas for today’s enjoyment and tomorrow’s memories.
My illness imposes real limitations upon me; I will not impose artificial ones upon myself.
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One Day At A Time
Secrets
There were deep secrets hidden in my heart, never said for fear others would scoff or sneer. At last I can reveal my sufferings, for the strength I once felt in silence has lost all its power. Deidra Sarault
I've heard it said in program that we are only a sick as the secrets we keep. If that is the case, then I was very sick when desperation forced me through the doors of ths wonderful fellowship. Not one of my friends or family knew what I was doing around food, as most of it was done in secret, and I was always careful to remove all the evidence. I couldn't believe that anyone would love me if they knew what I was doing around food, and felt that I was either really bad or totally crazy, or both. But for the first time ever, I was able to come clean about what I was doing around food, and I wasn't judged or frowned upon. The love and acceptance I have received here has been totally overwhelming, but in addition I found out that others had done the same or similar things to what I had done, and so for the first time ever, I felt that I wasn't alone. Not only have I been able to talk freely about my food and what I had been doing, as well as what it was doing to me, but in the fourth and fifth step, I was finally able to share with another person my darkest deepest secrets, that for years I'd thought had made me this terrible person. It was in fact in sharing all the things that I'd thought of as so bad, that I came to realise that it was only my magnifying mind that had made them appear so, and that in fact they really weren't bad at all. I would never have found that out, had I not been in this program, and I'm so grateful for the relief that sharing all these things has given me.
One Day at a Time . . . I will learn to get honest and share with my sponsor and others in this program, all the things that are bothering me, whether it be food or other issues, so I can be relieved of the pain that all my secrets are causing me. ~ Sharon
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Although financial recovery is on the way for many of us, we found we could not place money first. For us, material well-being always followed spiritual progress; it never preceded. - pg. 127 - The Family Afterward
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The professionals and counselors in our new life may appraise our situation better than us. They did not carry on a love affair with our drug of choice. Therefore, their evaluation of what the heck we are doing may be more nearly correct.
May I have the ability to listen to those trying to help me; they honestly may be more objective than myself.
Sincerity
I will be sincere. I will pray with a true heart. I will greet life and the gifts it gives me with an appreciative heart. Today I will not ask life to be something I am not willing to be. I won't ask the world to shower blessings onto me that I am not willing to deserve by my own right action. I will be the goodness I wish to have - Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We may have the right to be wrong, but our steps teach us that we don't have the right to do wrong. When my only reason for doing something is 'because I have the right!' it usually turns out wrong.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
There are no chemical solutions to spiritual problems.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I know that I am being led along a path of healing today. As I become more and more open to spirituality and recovery, My path becomes brighter and clearer every day.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I wanted to be a writer. So I bought a pipe, a sports jacket with leather on the sleeves and a book on French. And I sat in the bar. I never wrote a line. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 22, 2017 22:07:00 GMT -5
February 21
Daily Reflections
I'M PART OF THE WHOLE
At once, I became a part--if only a tiny part--of a cosmos.... AS BILL SEES IT, p. 225
When I first came to A.A., I decided that "they" were very nice people--perhaps a little naive, a little too friendly, but basically decent, earnest people (with whom I had nothing in common). I saw "them" at meetings --after all, that was where "they" existed. I shook hands with "them" and, when I went out the door, I forgot about "them." Then one day my Higher Power, whom I did not then believe in, arranged to create a community project outside of A.A., but one which happened to involve many A.A. members. We worked together, I got to know "them" as people. I came to admire "them," even to like "them" and, in spite of myself, to enjoy "them." "Their" practice of the program in their daily lives--not just talk at meetings --attracted me and I wanted what they had. Suddenly the "they" became "we." I have not had a drink since.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I go to the A.A. meetings because it helps me in my business of keeping sober. And I try to help other alcoholics when I can, because that's my part of my business of keeping sober. I also have a partner in this business and that's God. I pray to Him every day to help me keep sober. As long as I keep in mind that liquor can never be my friend again, but is now my deadly enemy, and as long as I remember that my main business is keeping sober and that it's the most important thing in my life, I believe that I'll be prepared for that crucial moment when the idea of having a drink pops into my mind. When that idea comes, will I be able to resist it and not take that drink?
Meditation For The Day
I will be more afraid of spirit-unrest, of soul- disturbance, of any ruffling of the mind, than of earthquake or fire. When I feel the calm of my spirit has been broken by emotional upset, then I must steal away alone with God, until my heart sings and all is strong and calm again. Uncalm times are the only times when evil can find an entrance. I will beware of unguarded spots of unrest. I will try to keep calm, no matter what turmoil surrounds me.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that no emotional upset will hinder God's power in my life. I pray that I may keep a calm spirit and a steady heart.
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As Bill Sees It
To Guard Against A Slip, p. 52
Suppose we fall short of our chosen ideals and stumble? Does this mean we are going to get drunk? Some people tell us so. But this is only a half-truth.
It depends on us and on our motives. If we are sorry for what we have done, and have the honest desire to let God take us to better things, we believe we will be forgiven and will have learned our lesson. If we are not sorry, and our conduct continues to harm others, we are quite sure to drink. These are facts out of our experience.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 70
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Walk In Dry Places
Unexpected Disappointments____Acceptance. As life unfolds, we sometimes get unexpected disappointments that seem undeserved -- the car breaks down, a business deal goes sour, or a close friend betrays us. As alcoholics, most of us don't handle such things too well. "Why me, Lord?" we often respond. Our best approach is simply to view life as a mixture of bitter and sweet, knowing that we've been given real mastery over conditions. We cannot always be sure that a disappointment really is as bad as it seems to be, and sometimes it can become a step toward our good. As one alcoholic phrased it, "some of the worst things that have happened turned out to be the best." It's good to face the day with optimism, with confidence, and even with some excitement about the opportunities ahead. If we're maintaining sober thinking, everything that happens today will be transformed into gains for tomorrow -- all our tomorrows. We're on a spiritual journey that goes far beyond anything we're doing here and now. I won't expect to be disappointed today, but I'll know that nothing can really upset or disturb me without my permission.
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Keep It Simple
It easier to speak of love, than to practice it. --Anonymous Do we help our neighbor who is in need? We must help when we see the need, not just when it fits our schedule. In the program, this becomes our goal. We work at helping out. For example, when someone is needed to run the meeting, we offer. We see that the needs of the group are also our needs. We are the group. Over time, the idea of service spreads to the rest of our lives. Maybe we help a family down the street. We start to see that we have something to offer the world; ourselves. We start to see that the needs of the world are also our needs. We are an important part of the world. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, make me quick to act when I see a need. Please don't let my fear stop me.. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list what I have to offer the world. I will think of two ways I can use these gifts my Higher Power has given me.
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Each Day a New Beginning
We can never go back again, that much is certain. --Daphne DuMaurier Yesterday is gone, but its experiences will be reflected in those of today. We learned from both the good and the bad situations of yesterday. Where we travel today, likewise, will influence our direction tomorrow. We can't do over what has gone before, but we can positively incorporate all that life is offering us from this moment forth. We are moving toward greater understanding of life's mysteries with each experience. As today unfolds, we can be moved by the adventures. What we experience is ours alone and will contribute to the unfolding of our special destiny. We move forward, only forward. The doors behind us are closed forever. Facing what comes to us, with strength, is a gift from this program we share. Letting go of the yesterdays and the last years is another gift offered by this program. And trust that what we face along with what we let go will weave the pattern of our rightful unfolding--that is the ultimate gift given to us by this program. I need never go back again. I am spared that. My destiny lies in the future. And I can be certain it will bring me all that I desire, and more.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
We know these suggestions are sometimes difficult to follow, but you will save many a heartbreak if you can succeed in observing them. Your husband may come to appreciate your reasonableness and patience. This may lay the groundwork for a friendly talk about his alcoholic problem. Try to have him bring up the subject himself. Be sure you are not critical during such a discussion. Attempt instead, to put yourself in his place. Let him see that you want to be helpful rather than critical.
p. 111
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
GUTTER BRAVADO - Alone and unemployable, he was given two options by the court, get help or go to jail, and his journey toward teachability began.
So today I'm much more comfortable with life, as Alcoholics Anonymous has promised, and I know they're right when they say it keeps getting better. My circumstances have steadily improved as my spiritual life grows and matures. Words cannot begin to describe the feelings in my heart as I sometimes ponder how much my life has changed, how far I've come, and how much there is yet to discover. And though I'm not sure where my journey may take me next, I know I'll owe it to the grace of God and to three words of the Twelve Steps: continue, improve, and practice. Oh, and one more thing they told me: Humility is the key.
p. 511
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
AUTONOMY is a ten-dollar word. But in relation to us, it means very simply that every A.A. group can manage its affairs exactly as it pleases, except when A.A. as a whole is threatened. Comes now the same question raised in Tradition One. Isn't such liberty foolishly dangerous? Over the years, every conceivable deviation from our Twelve Steps and Traditions has been tried. That was sure to be, since we are so largely a band of ego-driven individualists. Children of chaos, we have defiantly played with every brand of fire, only to emerge unharmed and, we think, wiser. These very deviations created a vast process of trial and error which, under the grace of God, has brought us to where we stand today.
p. 146
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Words are the most powerful drug used by mankind. --Cited in Even More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES
I was led around by emotions rather than facts.
Honesty is the absence of the intent to deceive.
Every man must take time daily for quiet and meditation. In daily meditation lies the secret of power. No one can grow in either spiritual knowledge or power without it. --H. Emilie Cady
No matter what is happening in your life, know that God Is Waiting for you with open Arms.
Sometimes Love is just Love and can't be something you can analyze or even understand.
"It doesn't matter if your on the right track, if you don't move, you'll get run over" --Will Rogers
Today I know that I am doing the best I can and will be gentle with myself. I will watch what comes without struggle and will accept what is and adjust myself to it, rather than wanting it to be different than it is. --Ruth Fishel
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ART
"Only work which is the product of inner compulsion can have spiritual meaning." -- Walter Gropius
I have developed, in my recovery, an awareness of the beauty of this world and an appreciation of what man can produce. Sobriety has made art accessible. Today I can see beauty in paintings, sculpture, music, literature and the natural "art" of nature.
Spirituality is always creative and it is at the center of all that is good, noble and inspiring. Although I am not an artist, I can appreciate and have a feeling of "belonging" to the beauty of this world --- in a sense it all happens and takes shape through me. The rediscovery of spirituality has brought the world and the universe into my life.
Help me to have the desire to recreate Your splendors through my experiences.
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"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope." Romans 15:13
"I can do all things in Him who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13
"Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." 1 Peter 3:8-9
"And do not keep striving for what you are to eat and what you are to drink, and do not keep worrying.... Instead, strive for his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well." Luke 12:29,31
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Daily Inspiration
All the good things in life don't mean much if we fail to enjoy them. Lord, may I pause to notice my blessings and be joyful.
Your last chance to do anything about today is right now. Lord, help me keep my thoughts on making this day better so that I build a good foundation for tomorrow.
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NA Just For Today
Self-Pity Or Recovery - It's Our Choice
"Self-pity is one of the most destructive of defects; it will drain us of all positive energy." Basic Text, p. 77
In active addiction, many of us used self-pity as a survival mechanism. We didn't believe there was an alternative to living in our disease&151or perhaps we didn't want to believe. As long as we could feel sorry for ourselves and blame someone else for our troubles, we didn't have to accept the consequences of our actions; believing ourselves powerless to change, we didn't have to accept the need for change. Using this "survival mechanism" kept us from entering recovery and led us closer, day by day, to self-destruction. Self-pity is a tool of our disease; we need to stop using it and learn instead to use the new tools we find in the NA program. We have come to believe that effective help is available for us; when we seek that help, finding it in the NA program, self-pity is displaced by gratitude. Many tools are at our disposal: the Twelve Steps, the support of our sponsor, the fellowship of other recovering addicts, and the care of our Higher Power. The availability of all these tools is more than enough reason to be grateful. We no longer live in isolation, without hope; we have certain help at hand for anything we may face. The surest way to become grateful is to take advantage of the help available to us in the NA program and to experience the improvement the program will bring in our lives.
Just for today: I will be grateful for the hope NA has given me. I will cultivate my recovery and stop cultivating self-pity.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We cannot do all things. --Virgil We are each limited in terms of time and energy. If we try to do too much, we do everything half-rate. How much better it is to clearly sort out what is really important to us, and then give ourselves to those things or people wholeheartedly. Famous writers have written about the difficulty of having more than one or two really good friends. That number seems so unimpressive if we equate popularity with the number of friends we have. If we want quality, we must accept our limitations. In this way we avoid wasting energy on unimportant tasks, on friends who aren't true or close, on goals which aren't what we really want. We can only commit ourselves wholeheartedly to a limited number of tasks and a limited number of people. Who are my truly good friends?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. The readiness is all. --William Shakespeare Our concept of control was flawed. This program leads us into a New World. Here we meet the fact that we are powerless to change some aspects of ourselves. But we can become ready to be changed. That makes all the difference. When we accept this truth, we are already changed and we are more in line with nature and the universe. We can't make ourselves less perfectionistic, but we can become ready to let go of our demand for perfection. We can't force family harmony into our lives, but we can become more ready to be harmonious. We can't make a lasting love appear for us on command - we can become ready for such a relationship when the opportunities appear. Do we yearn for some change? How might we ready ourselves to receive it? Today, I will try to become ready for the help and change I most need in my life.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Living in the Present The present moment is all we have. Yes, we have plans and goals, a vision for tomorrow. But now is the only time we possess. And it is enough. We can dear our mind of the residue of yesterday. We can clear our mind of fears of tomorrow. We can be present, now. We can make ourselves available to this moment, this day. It is by being fully present now that we reach the fullness of tomorrow. Have no fear, child, a voice whispers. Have no regrets. Relinquish your resentments. Let Me take your pain. All you have is the present moment. Be still. Be here. Trust. All you have is now. It is enough. Today, I will affirm that all is well around me, when all is well within.
It is exciting to know that I have all the strength I need today to do what is good and right in my life. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Let Love Be
You can’t control love. It’s impossible. It’s like screaming and screeching and begging a rose to unfold faster, better, or differently.
Love is an energy– an active, living force that runs its threads through all of life, through all of the universe. But we can’t control love. It is not its nature to be controlled. It’s futile to stand with our hands in our pockets and heels dug into the ground saying, I shall control the course of love, or I shall allow another to control me because I’m afraid love will go away.
We can open our hearts and let love run through us. We can open our hearts and receive love. We can open our eyes and see universal love all around us, in places we never saw it before. We can awaken our souls and see that all these experiences have been lessons of love. Learning courage, faith, patience. Learning to love ourselves, when it looked and felt as if no one else did. Learning to express our creativity, express our emotions, and experience joy. Each one has been a lesson of love.
We have learned to let love be and be open to what that is and the new direction it may lead us in. Love is a powerful living force that permeates the universe and funnels through us. We don’t lead it, it leads and guides us.
Honor the guidance of your heart, and you will be honoring the guidance of love.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say woohoo wherever you are
I walked into the beach house after a day of work to find my friendly tormentors, Chip and Andy, standing by the window that drops down to the beach. Actually, Chip was standing next to the window; Andy was outside, hanging by a climbing harness. The rope led into the house and was tied off around one of the support beams.
I didn’t ask what they were doing. I just grabbed the climbing harness that was lying on the floor at Chip’s feet and asked if I could try,too.
Rappelling from the house down to the beach is not my ordinary activity. But sometimes, even the smallest, most ridiculous things can be a chance for a mini-woohoo. That night, I learned to rappel in the moonlight on the beach from the living room of my house.
Be open to new experience in your life. If it isn’t life-threatening, maybe it’s okay, even if it is a little odd. Don’t be afraid to be ridiculous, look a little uncool, and even let out an aaah now and then.
Have you had a woohoo lately? Have you got one on your list? Or maybe in your garage? Put on some Rollerblades, buy a surfboard, get out your sled. Order something new off the menu. Take a different road. Find the woohoo; then carry it with you into your ordinary world and let it lighten your spirit.
Woohoos are the moments we’ll remember all our lives.
God, help me lighten my spirit by putting a little woohoo into my daily life.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Do I waste my time and energy wrestling with situations that aren’t actually worth a second thought? Like Don Quixote, the bemused hero of Spanish literature, do I imagine windmills as menacing giants, battling them until I am ready to drop from exhaustion? Today, I’ll not allow my imagination to build small troubles into big ones. I’ll try to see each situation clearly, giving it only the value and attention it deserves. Have I come to believe, as the seecond of the Twelve Steps suggest, that a Power greater than myself can restore me to sanity?
Today I Pray
God, keep my perspective sane. Help me to avoid aggrandizing petty problems, trying to much significance to casual conversations,making a Vesuvius out of an anthill. Keep my fears from swelling out of scale, like shadows on a wall. Restore my values, which became distorted during thee days of my chemical invollvement.
Today I Will Remember
Sanity is perspective.
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One More Day
I will not keep myself from taking positive action. – K. O’Brien
The inability to get going can sometimes plague us. Muscles that don’t work properly or joints that won’t bend can keep us from beginning the day as we once did, even if we have excellent intentions.
Excellent intentions only, however, get us nowhere unless we act upon them. What we need is that extra measure of strength, drawn from some inner resource that we hold in store only for days such as these. Often those sources spring from our intense belief that we will make it through these difficult times. Gradually we recognize that our actions and reactions are becoming more positive.
I try to reach a little bit further for the strength I need to fulfill my good intentions.
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One Day At A Time
~ PROGRESS ~
" ... I was taught that the way of progress is neither swift nor easy." Marie Curie
I have always been the queen of quick fix, so if I wanted something to happen, it had to happen today if not yesterday. So coming into the program was very hard for me, in that for the first time I have had to realise that recovery is not an overnight thing. For a perfectionist like me, that has been a very hard lesson to learn, in that I don't have to have perfect recovery. My journey in this program has been an up and down one, with many slips along the way, and everytime I have slipped, I have had to remember that I may think I'm a failure, but I'm only a failure if I fail to pick myself up. In the past if I made a mistake, I was a total and utter failure, but I know now that all I have to do each time is to pick myself up, dust myself off and start over.
The other thing I've learned in the program is that I also always need to remember where I came from, and when I look back, I can see the progress I have made. My self esteem is growing, and even though I still seem to slip back into the old character defects from time to time, they are nowhere near as bad as in the past. I am able to forgive people whom I thought I would never be able to forgive, and I make amends whenever the need arises, and as a result my relationships with people have improved dramatically.
One Day at a Time . . . May I remember that in this program, it is always progress and not perfection that counts. ~ Sharon ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If a repetition is to be prevented, place the problem, along with everything else, in God's hands. - Pg. 120 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
One of the games our mind plays with us during withdrawal is to suggest that if we were addicted to one chemical, that was our problem and maybe we could use another type of chemical to help us. But switching chemicals will insure that we never get well, because the disease is not a chemical--it is a dysfunction to any mind-affecting chemical.
If I learn nothing else this hour, help me understand that the disease is not a drug but a reaction to drugs.
Gifts
Today I will be thankful for the many gifts that are mine. Life is a gift. Health is a gift. Love is a gift. Friends and family are gifts. If I take the time to say thank you, I have so many things to be thankful for. When I learn to say thank you, to give praise and gratitude, my life immediately feels more full.
I embrace the gifts that surround me
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We often hear 'turn it over.' This means turn over problems not under our control right now--whether they are with family, friends, work, or the law--we offer the things we cannot change to a Higher Power and LET GO.
If I turn it over and don't let go, I'll be upside down!
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Put one foot in front of the other.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It is exciting to know that I have all the strength I need today to do what is good and right in my life.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. - Judy Garland.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 22, 2017 22:07:56 GMT -5
February 22
Daily Reflections
GUIDANCE
... this means a belief in a Creator who is all power, justice, and love; a God who intends for me a purpose, a meaning, and a destiny to grow, however... haltingly, toward His own likeness and image. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 51
As I began to understand my own powerlessness and my dependence on God, as I understand Him, I began to see that there was a life which, if I could have it, I would have chosen for myself from the beginning. It is through the continuous work of the Steps and the life in the Fellowship that I've learned to see that there is truly a better way into which I am being guided. As I come to know more about God, I am able to trust His ways and His plans for the development of His character in me. Quickly or not so quickly, I grow toward His image and likeness.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Now we can take an inventory of the good things that have come to us through A.A. To begin with, we're sober today. That's the biggest asset on any alcoholic's books. Sobriety to us is like good-will in business. Everything else depends on that. Most of us have jobs, which we owe to our sobriety. We know we couldn't hold these jobs if we were drinking, so our jobs depend on our sobriety. Most of us have families, wives and children, which either we had lost or might have lost, if we hadn't stopped drinking. We have friends in A.A., real friends who are always ready to help us. Do I realize that my job, my family and my real friends are dependent upon my sobriety?
Meditation For The Day
I must trust God to the best of my ability. This lesson has to be learned. My doubts and fears continually drive me back into the wilderness. Doubts lead me astray, because I am not trusting God. I must trust God's love. It will never fail me, but I must learn not to fail it by my doubts and fears. We all have much to learn in turning out fear by faith. All our doubts arrest God's work through us. I must not doubt. I must believe in God and continually work at strengthening my faith.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may live the way God wants me to live. I pray that I may get into that stream of goodness in the world.
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As Bill Sees It
"Loners"--but Not Alone, p. 53
What can be said of many A.A. members who, for a variety of reasons, cannot have a family life? At first many of these feel lonely, hurt, and left out as they witness so much domestic happiness about them. If they cannot have this kind of happiness, can A.A. offer them satisfactions of similar worth and durability?
Yes-- whenever they try hard to seek out these satisfactions. Surrounded by so many A.A. friends, the so-called loners tell us they no longer feel alone. In partnership with others--women and men--they can devote themselves to any number of ideas, people, and constructive projects. They can participate in enterprises which would be denied to family men and women. We daily see such members render prodigies of service, and receive great joys in return.
12 & 12, p. 120
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Walk In Dry Places
Staying on course___Power in purpose When riding in an airplane on automatic pilot, I marvel at the way the aircraft stays on course even while bouncing and shaking through pockets of turbulence. Even more significant is the pilot's calm indifference to these minor movements as he checks occasionally to make sure the plane continues on the right course. Many things that happen to us each day are no more important than the routine turbulence and aircraft encounters. But as sick, compulsive people, we sometimes view every disturbance as a terrible storm and become panicky or enraged over things that are of little consequence in the long run. "I could accept a major calamity, but a broken fingernail ruined my day," one speaker said at an AA meeting. We can set our lives on "automatic pilot" by choosing continuing recovery as our major goal and letting all things fall in line with that. The turbulence of ordinary living cannot deflect us from our true course if we calmly accept it as natural, unavoidable, and non-threatening. Even if a real storm blows up and gives us anxious moments, we can stay on the recovery course we have chosen. Disappointments and annoyances are part of the human condition. I will be cheerful and optimistic today even if I am bounced around a bit. There is within me an automatic pilot, through which my Higher Power leads me to continued recovery and true fulfillment as a person.
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Keep It Simple
To thine own self be true.--AA medallions Sometimes we hear that we have a "selfish program." Being "selfish" means that we ask for help when we need it. We only go to places that are safe for us, no matter what others are doing. Being selfish comes to mean safety for us. Being selfish doesn't mean we act like brats. We must act in ways that show respect and love---for ourselves and for others. being selfish means we do what is good for us. What is good for us? First, we have to save our lives by stopping our drinking and drugging. Next, we start working the Steps. We come to know a loving Higher Power. This is how we come to know our true self. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be true to myself and my values. Help me be "selfish" about spending time to talk with You each day. Action for the Day: I'll list ten ways I need to be "selfish" in recovery. If I get stuck, I'll be "selfish" and ask for help.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Toleration is the greatest gift of the mind. --Helen Keller Facing conditions we would like to change, letting go of people we wish were different, takes growth, patience, tolerance. We're so easily enticed into thinking we'd be happier, "If only he'd change," or "If I had a better job," or "If the kids would settle down." Yet we carry the seed of happiness within us every moment. Learning tolerance for all conditions will nurture that seed. Intolerance, impatience, depression, in fact, any negative attitude is habit-forming. Many of us in this recovery program continue to struggle with the habits we've formed. Bad habits must be replaced with new, good habits. We can develop a new behavior, one that pleases us, like smiling at every stranger in a checkout line. We can repeat it in every line. It becomes a habit and a good one. Toleration of others opens many doors, for them and for us. It nurtures the soul, ours and theirs. It breeds happiness. Those of us sharing these Steps are truly blessed. We're learning about love, how to give it and how to receive it. There are so many eyes I'll look into today that don't know love. I will give some away with unconditional tolerance. It's a gift--to myself and others.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
When a discussion does arise, you might suggest he read this book or at least the chapter on alcoholism. Tell him you have been worried, though perhaps needlessly. You think he ought to know the subject better, as everyone should have a clear understanding of the risk he takes if he drinks too much. Show him you have confidence in his power to stop or moderate. Say you do not want to be a wet blanket; that you only want him to take care of his health. Thus you may succeed in interesting him in alcoholism.
pp. 111-112
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
I spent my life "acting as if"--either acting as if I knew (I didn't ask teachers questions in school; they might find out I didn't know the answer) or acting as if I didn't care. I always felt as though everyone else had been given the directions to life and I had been somewhere else when God was handing them out. To me, you either knew how to do something or you didn't. You could play the piano, or you couldn't. You were a good ballplayer, or you weren't.
p. 512
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
When A.A.'s Traditions were first published, in 1946, we had become sure that an A.A. group could stand almost any amount of battering. We saw that the group, exactly like the individual, must eventually conform to whatever tested principles would guarantee survival. We had discovered that there was perfect safety in the process of trial and error. So confident of this had we become that the original statement of A.A. tradition carried this significant sentence: "Any two or three alcoholics gathered together for sobriety may call themselves an A.A. group provided that as a group they have no other affiliation."
pp. 146-147
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If you find a flaw in someone else it means that you first found the flaw in yourself, otherwise you would not have recognized it.
Forgiveness is the way to true health and happiness. By not judging, we release the past and let go of our fears of the future. In so doing, we come to see that everyone is our teacher and that every circumstance is an opportunity for growth in happiness, peace and love. --Gerald G. Jampolsky
Whoever makes no mistakes is doing nothing. --Dutch Proverb
Today, I will take time to smell the flowers.
Joy isn't the absence of pain - it's the presence of God.
Worry is like a rocking chair--it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere. --Dorothy Galyean
Stop worrying about the potholes in the road and celebrate the journey! --Barbara Hoffman
God is making something wondrous of my life. --Anita J. McIntosh
God calls us in the small choices of each day. --John Covington
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PATRIOTISM
"For us, patriotism is the same as the love of humanity." -- Mohandas Gandhi
Today I am on the side of mankind. I am convinced that my welfare is generated by the peace and stability of the world. The love and joy that produces spiritual growth stems from my relationships in the world: we cannot exist alone.
Today I strive to bring the world and people together; we must not seek to be the same but rather rejoice in the richness of difference.
Drugs always divide, separate and isolate; spirituality unites. Today I am an optimist for mankind because of what has happened in my own life.
Thank You for a humanity that can be shared.
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Let the wise listen and add to their learning and let the discerning get guidance. Proverbs 1 : 5
"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him." Psalm 62:5
Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait on the Lord. Psalm 31:24
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Daily Inspiration
When you need to feel better about yourself, do something nice for someone else. Lord, help that I may make someone's day a little happier.
To have courage, think courageous, act courageous, and pray to God for courage. Lord, You are full of love for all who come to You.
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NA Just For Today
God's Will, Or Mine?
"We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Step Ten
In Narcotics Anonymous, we've found that the more we live in harmony with our Higher Power's will for us, the greater
the harmony in our lives. We use the Tenth Step to help us maintain that harmony. On a daily basis, we take time to
look at our behavior. Some of us measure each action with a very simple question: "God's will, or mine?"
In many cases, we find that our actions have been in tune with our Higher Power's will for us, and we in turn have
been in tune with the world around us. In some cases, however, we will discover inconsistencies between our
behavior and our values. We've been acting on our own will, not God's, and the result has been dissonance in our
lives.
When we discover such inconsistencies, we admit we've been wrong and take corrective action. With greater
awareness of what we believe God's will for us to be in such situations, we are less likely to repeat those actions. And
we are more likely to live in greater concord with our Higher Power's will for us and with the world around us.
Just for today: I wish to live in harmony with my world. Today, I will examine my actions, asking, "God's will, or mine?"
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. --Anne Frank In the face of being hunted for extermination, Anne Frank could write this from her hiding place in an attic. Was she
naive? No. She deeply believed in the goodness of creation and the goodness of all creatures, including those who
persecuted and murdered her people. Somehow, young as she was, Anne Frank knew a truth we sometimes lose: that it is not what people do that makes
them good or evil. It is who they are. And for Anne Frank, all people are made in the image of God--and therefore, deep
down at their core, must be good. She was able to see through the brutality and hatred to that true creation of God. We are left in awe at such faith and love. But we can draw from it too, and when our brother or sister or parent or child
does something to hurt us, we can remember Anne Frank's ability to see what is good. We can look beneath the
hurtful actions and forgive. Can I forgive someone who has hurt me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult. --Seneca When we reach a stressful time in our lives, our vision gets narrow. We fail to see the options and possibilities we
have. If we give ourselves over to our worries and fears, our sight closes down even further. Finally, we reach the
point of blindness to reality and to all the support around us. In our fearful blindness we say with conviction, "This is too
difficult! There is nothing I can do." The spiritual man strives to keep one eye on the horizon, even in a worrisome situation. He breaths deeply so he does
not tighten up or closes off his exchange with the world. He returns to the relationship he has with his Higher Power,
trusting the process to carry him through, and he opens his eyes to quietly take in the possibilities before him. Close to my Higher Power, I have a place of calm in the midst of difficulty and see the possibilities and dare to act
upon them.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Solving Problems I ask that You might help me work through all my problems, to Your Glory and Honor.' --Alcoholics Anonymous Many of us lived in situations where it wasn't okay to identify, have, or talk about problems. Denial became a way of life
our way of dealing with problems In recovery, many of us still fear problems. We may spend more time reacting to a problem than we do to solving it.
We miss the point; we miss the lesson; we miss the gift Problems are a part of life. So are solutions A problem doesn't mean life is negative or horrible. Having a problem doesn't mean a person is deficient. All people
have problems to work through. In recovery, we learn to focus on solving our problems. First, we make certain the problem is our problem. If it isn't,
our problem is establishing boundaries. Then we seek the best solution. This may mean setting a goal, asking for
help, gathering more information, taking an action, or letting go. Recovery does not mean immunity or exemption from problems; recovery means learning to face and solve
problems, knowing they will appear regularly. We can trust our ability to solve problems, and know we're not doing it
alone. Having problems does not mean our Higher Power is picking on us. Some problems are part of life; others are
ours to solve, and we'll grow in necessary ways in the process. Face and solve today's problems. Don't worry needlessly about tomorrow's problems, because when they appeal,
well have the resources necessary to solve them. Facing and solving problems working through problems with help from a Higher Power means we're living and
growing and reaping benefits. God, help me face and solve my problems today. Help me do my part and let the rest go. I can learn to be a problem
solver.
God is guiding me on my path to self-sufficiency and independence today. As I become willing to let go of my feelings
of inferiority and weakness, my Higher Power gives me all the strength that I need for all that comes up for me today.
--Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Magic Is in the Air
I left Washington’s Hob Rain Forest, pausing near the moss-covered trees. My walk through Moses Park had indeed
been a trip to an enchanted forest.
Centuries-old trees, trees covered with mossy hair, shared their stories with me. Felled trees lying on their backs
beckoned me to touch, to sit, to rest a while. Sunlight glistened through the entangled underbrush. The air smelled of
nature’s sawdust. The ground was warm, moist. Nature sprites danced and played along the path. The birds
serenaded me with calls, whistles, and songs, like sounds emanating from a flute. Magic was in the air.
We can visit places that are magical to us, enchanted forests that remind us of life’s wonders. We can visit them
knowing that when we leave, we take their magic with us.
We’ll see more and more of life’s wonders in ourselves, in others, in the world we live in. People will appear in our
lives at just the right time, saying the very words we need to hear. A book will speak to us. A new way to earn money
will be revealed. A loved one may leave to follow his or her own path, and a new love will come into our lives. Old
issues will be resolved. Healers will show up on our path. Ideas will come to us, seemingly out of the blue. They’re
gifts from the universe. We can have them whenever we want and wherever we go.
Come with me to the enchanted forest. Trust the magic in the air; it is real. Take it with you wherever you go, for the
magic you feel and want is yours if you simply believe.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Stop throwing that blame around
“There are two kinds of people in the world,” a friend explained to me one day. “There are the ones who blame other
people for everything that happens. And there are the ones who blame themselves.”
Have you ever watched a movie where one of the actors used a flamethrower? In a movie I watched one day, they
called this instead a “blame thrower.” It’s a lit torch of fiery rage that we throw at either others or ourselves when
situations don’t work out the way we planned.
Blaming can be a healthy stage of grieving or letting go. But staying too long in this stage can be unproductive. It can
keep us from taking constructive action. Blaming ourselves too long can turn into self-contempt; blaming others can
keep us heavy and dark with resentments, and fuel the victim within.
If you’re going through a loss, or if life has twisted on you, pick up your blame thrower– in the privacy of your own
journal. Give yourself ten or twenty minutes to blame without censorship. Get it out. Write out everything you want to
say, whether you’re throwing blame at someone else or at yourself.
It may take longer if the loss is larger, but the point is to give yourself a limited amount of time for a blame-throwing
session, then cease fire. Stop. Move on to the next stage in living, which is letting go, accepting, and taking
responsibility for yourself.
God, help me search myself to see if I’m holding on to blame for myself or someone else. If I am, help me get it out in
the open, then help me let it go.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I came to The Program, I found people who knew exactly what I meant when I spoke finally of my fears. They
had been where I had been; they understood. I’ve since learned that many of my fears have to do with projection. It’s
normal, for example, to have a tiny “back-burner” fear that the person I love will leave me. But when the fear takes
precedence over my present and very real relationship with the person I’m afraid of losing, then I’m in trouble. My
responsibility to myself includes this: I must not fear things which do not exist. Am I changing from a fearful person into
a fearless person?
Today I Pray
I ask God’s help in waving away my fears — those figments, fantasies, monstrous thoughts, projections of disaster
which have no bearing on the present. May I narrow the focus of my imagination and concentrate on the here-and-
now, for I tend to see the future through a magnifying glass.
Today I Will Remember
Projected fears, like shadows, are larger than life.
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One More Day
The soul would have no rainbow Had the eyes no tears. – John Vance Cheney
That familiar tightening in the throat, the welling of tears behind the eyes, and deep emotional pain are all signs of an
intense need to cry. Why do we try so hard to be “brave little soldiers” and not cry when our bodies are screaming for
release?
If we hide behind false smiles and continue to keep the well of emotion untapped, eventually that well will go dry.
Deprived of this natural outlet, our minds and bodies exhaust themselves as they battle tension and stress. We lose
our ability to express ourselves emotionally. There may be no more opportunity for tears. Tears cleanse and allow
other emotions to move in and take over until we need to cry again.
Crying releases me and gives me the freedom to experience my full range of feelings.
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One Day At A Time
~ CHILDLIKE ~
Anxiety is the rust of life, destroying its brightness and weakening its power. A childlike and abiding trust in Providence is its best preventive and remedy. Tyron Edwards
Like so many of us in OA, I grew up as a little adult. My parents didn't know better - treating me like an adult seemed a good way to them of both showing love to me and making their difficult post-war life easier. Providence was something that intervened once in a while, and in ways that were weighty and important. God was there - but God had to attend to serious matters.
There was little room in God's and my parents' life for the seemingly unimportant details of a child's world. I had no trouble internalizing that message. I learned very soon that no-one was going to take care of my "little" problems and anxieties, that I had to shove them out of the way, and that I could do that very well by daydreaming, by making sure I was the little adult my parents were so proud of - and by eating.
The trouble was that there were times when these coping mechanisms didn't work seamlessly and those anxieties would break through. Panic attacks were the result, and dogged attempts to do more of the insanity: more retreating from the world, more "adult" behaviour, more eating.
One of the things I'm learning in recovery is that paradoxically, in order to really grow up, I need to risk the vulnerability of being more childlike. I need to learn that my Higher Power is not too busy worrying about world peace to listen and deeply care about my little booboos. I need to, I WANT to develop an abiding trust that I am safe with and cared for by my Higher Power, like a baby in a mother's arms.
One day at a time ... I let go of the rust of anxiety so that like a child, I may marvel at and participate in the brightness and wonder of God's world. ~ Isabella ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. - Pg. 102 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It has been said that there are only two times you have to diligently work this program, the first 30 days and every day after that! Actually if you think about it, that only means one day, today.
Help me work this program to the best of my ability today.
Opening to the New
Today I will be open to what life offers to me. The world comes to greet me like an old friend each morning. My daily habits comfort and ground me. The thought of moving into my day pleases me. Life unfolds one second at a time and today I will be present to witness it. How much of my life do I let pass by unnoticed? How many of my feelings go unfelt? Today I will recognize that my time on Earth is limited. I choose to value my life a day at a time and embrace it while I have it.
I am open to life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'You should not be esteemed by others if you have no real inner virtue.' -Dogen, The Pocket Zen Reader You get esteem by doing something esteeming.
I never have to worry about low self-esteem when I do esteeming things.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Character is how we act when we think no one is watching.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
God is guiding me on my path to self-sufficiency and independence today. As I become willing to let go of my feelings of inferiority and weakness, my Higher Power gives me all the strength that I need for all that comes up for me today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Wondering why I was an alcoholic was like being a man standing on a bridge, looking down at a gently flowing stream beneath. But my pants are on fire. And I'm saying: 'I wonder how these pants got on fire, was it hereditary or environmental?' Who cares. You jump in the water. - Doug D.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 22, 2017 22:08:45 GMT -5
February 23
Daily Reflections
MYSTERIOUS PARADOXES
Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one's old life as a condition for finding a new one. A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 46
What glorious mysteries paradoxes are! They do not compute, yet when recognized and accepted, they reaffirm something in the universe beyond human logic. When I face a fear, I am given courage; when I support a brother or sister, my capacity to love myself is increased; when I accept a pain as part of the growing experience of life, I realize a greater happiness; when I look at my dark side, I am brought into new light; when I accept my vulnerabilities and surrender to a Higher Power, I am graced with unforeseen strength. I stumbled through the doors of A.A. in disgrace, expecting nothing from life, and I have been given hope and dignity. Miraculously, the only way to keep the gifts of the program is to pass them on.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Besides our jobs, our families, our friends and our sobriety, we have something else which many of us found through A.A. That's faith in a Power greater than ourselves, to which we can turn for help: faith in that Divine Principle in the universe which we call God and which is on our side as long as we do the right thing. There have been many days in the past when, if we had taken an inventory, we'd have found ourselves very much in the red, without sobriety and therefore without jobs, families, friends or faith in God. We now have these things because we're sober. Do I make one resolution every day of my life--to stay sober?
Meditation For The Day
Love the busy life. It is a joy-filled life. Take your fill of joy in the Spring. Live outdoors whenever possible. Sun and air are nature's great healing forces. That inward joy changes poisoned blood into pure, healthy, life-giving flow. But never forget that the real healing of the spirit comes from within, from the close, loving contact of your spirit with God's spirit. Keep in close communion with God's spirit day by day.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may learn to live the abundant life. I pray that I may enjoy a close contact with God this day and be glad in it.
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As Bill Sees It
To Deepen Our Insight, p. 54
It is necessary that we extricate from an examination of our personal relations every bit of information about ourselves and our fundamental difficulties that we can. Since defective relations with other human beings have nearly always been the immediate cause of our woes, including our alcoholism, no field of investigation could yield more satisfying and valuable rewards than this one.
Calm, thoughtful reflection upon personal relations can deepen our insight. We can go far beyond those things which were superficially wrong with us, to see those flaws which were basic, flaws which sometimes were responsible for the whole pattern of our lives. Thoroughness, we have found, will pay--and pay handsomely.
12 & 12, p. 80
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Walk In Dry Places
We always have choices Decision Making Self-pity is often rooted in the strong feeling that people or conditions have victimized us. "I never had a chance" and "You deceived me!" are common complaints that reveal self-pity. It is astonishing and humbling to learn that we always have choices, even when other people or bad conditions are grinding us down. One of the great discoveries of the Twelve Step movement is that alcoholics could begin to recover no matter how helpless they had become, no matter how far they had slid into defeat and despair. Once a decision was made to seek sobriety as a primary goal, other choices and decisions became possible. We choose our attitudes and responses. We have neither the power nor the right to control others, but we can choose to soften our attitudes toward them, and we can forgive and release people we don't like. We can always choose how we want to think and feel. It may take effort to break the habit of feeling victimized and sorry for ourselves, but our higher power will show us the way if we decide that is what we really want. Nobody can ruffle my feathers today or make me feel oppressed and victimized. I can always make choices that will enhance my sobriety and place me on a better footing for the days ahead.
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Keep It Simple
Hitch your wagon to a star.---Ralph Waldo Emerson Millions of people are sober and have peace of mind through the Twelve Steps. Like the stars, the Steps are always there. At times, clouds block our view of the stars, but we know they are still there. Let's view the Twelve Steps the same way. It is said that the stars are the gate to heaven, that we pass through their beauty to get ready to enter heaven. The Twelve Steps are the gate to spirituality here on earth. We travel through their beauty on our way to a spiritual awakening. Hitch your wagon to the Steps, and get ready for the ride of a lifetime. Prayer for the Day: I pray to remember that the Steps keep me sober. I pray that I will follow where the Steps take me. Action For the Day: I'll look at the stars tonight. I'll think of them as symbols of my life touched by the Twelve Steps.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I want to dance always, to be good and not evil, and when it is all over not to have the feeling that I might have done better. --Ruth St. Denis Our wants in life may be simple, or they may be complex. They may yet be confused in our minds, but the clarity will come if we're patient. God has a way of giving us an "inner tug" when a certain direction beckons. Our responsibility is to follow that tug and trust it, fully. Too often we look back on our lives with regret. What is done, is done. We learned lessons from those mistakes. Every day is a new beginning. And we can close every day with no regrets when we have followed our consciences, that "inner tug" that beckons. The opportunities will come today. Opportunities to be good or evil. Opportunities for making choices over which we will feel good or full of regret at the day's close. Many of our choices will bring us closer to the satisfaction, the contentment with life, that we all search for as women, as human beings. We need not fear coming to life's close, wishing we had done more or better. Living each day in good conscience, waiting for the tug and following it, will ensure a life well lived. My ego can block out the tug, if I let it. Or I can trust.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
He probably has several alcoholics among his own acquaintances. You might suggest that you both take an interest in them. Drinkers like to help other drinkers. Your husband may be willing to talk to one of them.
p. 112
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
I don't know where I learned the attitude that it wasn't all right not to know, but it was certainly in my life, and it almost killed me. The concept of set a goal, work for the goal, achieve the goal was foreign to me. You either "had it" or you didn't, and if you didn't, you couldn't let on--you might look bad. I never once stopped to consider that others might really have to work hard for what they had. Gradually my attitude translated into contempt for those who did know--leave it to an alcoholic to look down on someone who is successful!
p. 512
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
This meant, of course, that we had been given the courage to declare each A.A. group an individual entity, strictly reliant on its own conscience as a guide to action. In charting this enormous expanse of freedom, we found it necessary to post only two storm signals: A group ought not do anything which would greatly injure A.A. as a whole, nor ought it affiliate itself with anything or anybody else. There would be real danger should we commence to call some groups "wet," others "dry," still others "Republican" or "Communist," and yet others "Catholic" or "Protestant." The A.A. group would have to stick to its course or be hopelessly lost. Sobriety had to be its sole objective. In all other respects there was perfect freedom of will and action. Every group had the right to be wrong.
p. 147
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The Seven "T's" ... Take Time To Think The Thing Through.
In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. --Anne Frank
So, don't take for granted just what you see. Look under the mask, that's where the real person will be. --author unknown
God is present in all things, even those events and circumstances that seem terrible. Within any circumstance is the seed that can bear the fruit of the greater good, if we are willing to ask God to lead us in bringing forth that good. --Mary Manin Morrissey
Laughter is the sound of recovery.
"It doesn't matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes. What matters most is getting off! You cannot make progress without making decisions." --Jim Rohn
"You can accomplish virtually anything if you want it badly enough and if you are willing to work long enough and hard enough." --Brian Tracy
"The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a man's determination." --Tommy Lasorda
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
THOUGHT
"I was a free-thinker before I knew how to think." -- George Bernard Shaw
All of us are influenced by somebody. Not to be influenced is to remain an ignorant person. Most of us hinder our thinking, particularly around spiritual things, because of pride. We don't like change. We find it hard to accept attitudes and opinions that differ from our own. Pride keeps us deaf and often stupid. However, the daily program of a lived spirituality encourages a variety of opinions and attitudes. We can learn from different customs, lifestyles and religions. We can be helped in our understanding of life by the stranger.
I know that I do not have all the answers. Perhaps you carry my answers. Today I am prepared to listen to you.
God, the sustainer of all religions and philosophies, help us to discover You in our differences.
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It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is Thy faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30
"But he said, 'What is impossible with men is possible with God.'" Luke 18:27
Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:2
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Daily Inspiration
There is no better time than right now to do what we have been putting off. Lord, grant me motivation and focus that I may live so as to have no regrets about what I should have done.
If you feel the need to get even, try getting even with those that have helped you. Lord, free me from any thoughts of revenge because this only shuts the door to my own happiness.
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NA Just For Today
Messages And Messengers
"Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." Tradition Twelve
The Twelfth Tradition reminds us of the importance of putting "principles before personalities." In recovery meetings,
this might be paraphrased, "don't shoot the messenger!" We often get the message confused with the messenger,
and negate what someone shares at a meeting because we have personality conflicts with the person speaking.
If we are having problems with what certain people have to share at meetings, we might want to seek the guidance of
our sponsor. Our sponsor can help us concentrate on what's being said rather than who's saying it. Our sponsor can
also help us address the resentments that may be keeping us from acknowledging the value of some particular
person's recovery experience. It is surprising how much more we can get out of meetings when we allow ourselves to
do as our Twelfth Tradition suggests, focusing on recovery principles rather than personalities.
Just for today: I will practice the principle of anonymity in today's NA meeting. I will focus on the message of recovery,
not the personality of the messenger.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. A person's best ally is someone who takes care of herself. --Susan Clarke Once there was a little girl who was learning to walk. The trouble was, her mother wouldn't let her fall down. Every
time she was about to fall, her mother would rush over and catch her. It was hard to learn how to walk if she couldn't fall down, but the girl was too little to be able to tell her mother. Her
mother thought she was taking care of her when in fact she was keeping her from learning to take care of herself.
Letting her fall would have shown trust in the child, trust that she could get up. It would have taught her that she wasn't
so fragile that she couldn't recover if she hurt herself. We are all like this mother once in a while, protecting one another from important lessons in life. This doesn't mean
we have to let someone get seriously hurt, but that we allow each other the freedom to learn and grow in individual
ways. What will I be able to learn from my little stumbles today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. A man who studieth revenge keeps his own wounds green. --Francis Bacon Where do we direct our energy? Are we spending time and thought on how we have been wronged? On the
unfairness of life? Those who consume their resources in this way have few left for growth and development. Their
wounds stay open for years, and they block the healing. What will we need to set aside our resentments and hateful attitudes? Perhaps we have been passively waiting for the
other guy to make amends. That only puts our enemies in charge of us. It would be better if we could say; "I am going
to move on. The change that is needed for me to heal will come from within me. I will not put my happiness in
another's hands." More than revenge, we want a life worth living - for ourselves and the ones we love. We can give our
energies to that. Lift from me the desire for revenge. Replace it with the fullness of a healed life.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Strength We don't always have to be strong to be strong. Sometimes, our strength is expressed in being vulnerable.
Sometimes, we need to fall apart to regroup and stay on track. We all have days when we cannot push any harder, cannot hold back self doubt, cannot stop focusing on fear, cannot
be strong. There are days when we cannot focus on being responsible. Occasionally we don't want to get out of our pajamas.
Sometimes, we cry in front of people. We expose our tiredness, irritability, or anger. Those days are okay. They are just okay. Part of taking care of ourselves means we give ourselves permission to "fall apart" when we need to. We do not have
to be perpetual towers of strength. We are strong. We have proven that. Our strength will continue if we allow
ourselves the courage to feel scared, weak, and vulnerable when we need to experience those feelings. Today, God, help me to know that it is okay to allow myself to be human. Help me not to feel guilty or punish myself
when I need to "fall apart."
Today I have the courage to own my own unhappiness, daring to look within to discover its source. Today I treat
myself as a friend, with gentleness and acceptance. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Let Power Come Gently
Let your powers emerge gradually, gently.
Go gently on your path and look around. See what you have learned to define as power. See with the eyes of your
heart.
You used to think you were powerful when you resisted your emotions, when you held back and didn’t express
yourself. You thought power came from being who you thought you should be, instead of who you are. Now you have
learned that only when you are who you really are, can true power emerge.
The powers you’ve discovered are many. Your power to be decent, loving, and kind. Your power to heal, to be gentle,
to comfort others. Your power to see and know the truth, and at times to see more than you can see with your eyes.
Your power to take your place in the dance of universal love, and let the universe dance for you.
These powers have been gifts. You’ve seen them. You understand them. You know they’re real. The choice to
embrace and use them is yours.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Learn to fly
Take your life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. –Erica Jong
There is always someone else to take the fall if our plans don’t work out: “I would have been more successful, but the
economy was slow this year.” “Well, that sounds nice, but my therapist says that I should avoid too much stress.” “I
wanted to do that, but my husband didn’t like the idea.”
What a frightening prospect it is to take your life into your own hands, to decide whether or not you will accept full
responsibility for all of your actions and choices.
What an amazing– and sometimes terrifying– freedom complete responsibility for your actions brings! Sometimes we
make mistakes. Sometimes we stumble and fall. But oh, the feeling when you finally get it right, when you decide to
take that step and it works! That’s when you discover that those fragile butterfly wings on your back are not there just
for ornamentation. You can fly!
Take charge of your life. Take responsibility for your actions. Ultimately no one chooses what you will do but you,
anyway. Enjoy the freedom. You’ve had it all along.
God, help me take complete responsibility for my own actions. Give me the guidance and power, to steer my own
course according to the dictates of my heart and my conscience.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
The Twelve Steps teach us that as faith grows, so does security. The terrifying fear of nothingness begins to subside.
As we work The Program, we find that the basic antidote for fear is a spiritual awakening. We lose the fear of making
decisions, for we realize that if our choice proves wrong, we can learn from the experience. and should our decision
be the right one, we can thank God for giving us the courage and the grace that caused us so to act. Am I grateful for
the courage and grace I receive from my Higher Power?
Today I Pray
I ask that I be given the power to act knowing that I have at least a half-chance to make the right decision and that I can
learn from a wrong one. for so long, decision-making seemed beyond my capabilities. Now, I can find joy in being able
to make choices. Thank you, God, for courage.
Today I Will Remember
Freedom is choosing.
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One More Day
Who can separate his faith from his actions, or his belief from his occupations? – Kahil Gibran
We may, at times, represent ourselves in an untrue fashion. This may happen when we are trying to impress
someone who doesn’t know us well. We may unconsciously try to imitate another person. Yet in doing so we are not
being faithful to the gift of our own uniqueness.
Our need to “prove ourselves” diminished only when self-esteem and self-awareness blossom. As we become more
secure, we begin to honestly express ourselves and our faith. We no longer need heroes to worship; we can instead
honor the gift of life.
I find comfort in the honest expression of my beliefs and feelings.
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One Day At A Time
HUMILITY
To the humble man, and to the humble man alone, the sun is really a sun; to the humble man, and to the humble man alone, the sea is really a sea. G.K. Chesterton
Before I started recovery, lack of clarity was all around me and within me. There was too much fear. I was unable to acknowledge: This is who I am, and this is what's going on, no more, and no less. I was afraid to name my husband's abusive behaviour. I was afraid to name my complicity in it. I was afraid to name who I was and what I wanted and needed, and I was afraid to name the behaviour of those around me who wanted me to fit into their mould. My husband was scared silly that one day the world would find out that we weren't the perfect family.
So I was not humble. I kept nurturing the fog that covered what was really going on. And boy, was I good at it. I kind of had an inkling that something wasn't right, so, semi-consciously, I made sure that my denial was watertight. I knew that if we pretended that we were a 100% perfect family, there might be suspicions. So I made sure I'd slip in a little problem here and there.
At one point, luckily, I allowed the bubble to burst. I started naming things, loud and clear. I named them to the police, I named them to my friends and family, I named them in my poetry. I started playing with another 12-step program.
But it took me another twelve years to name that I was an overeater. In those years I gained another 70 pounds (with some yoyo dieting thrown in, of course). Humbly admitting that, yes, really, I was an overeater, was the best thing I've done since ridding my family of my abusive spouse. I humbly admitted that I had been abusing myself with my eating behaviours. Now I can see clearly. (I can also see more clearly how wounded my ex spouse is, making it easier for me to work on forgiving him).
One day at a time ... I accept the gift of humility. I am not afraid anymore to look reality in the eye - and what I see is as right as the sun and the sea. ~ I.M.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. - Pg. 100 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Self will and 'running the show' can be like the monkey who sticks his hand into the trap for food. He grasps the food tightly creating a fist that won't fit out the trap door. The monkey struggles but won't release the food and he is trapped. Simply letting go would free him. Holding tight to your will and your way can be the fist that traps you. Let Go and Let God.
I let go of my tight grip by not insisting everything be my way. I say, 'Let Go and Let God' often to remind myself I don't want to be trapped. What a relief.
The Healing Universe
Everywhere I look life is in a process of healing from something. A plant that has been stepped on fights to come back to life. A tree that has lost branches sprouts new growth. An animal that has lost a leg learns to run on three. Life is always reaching for life. It's an unbroken circle. Like a lover reaching for their beloved , or a child holding onto his mother until the pain passes. Life is programmed to heal itself and it will strive towards that with all its will. I will allow this powerful force that's build into my DNA to work its magic on me. I won't resist my own healing. I will allow it in.
I am built to heal
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The safest banks fail, corporations fold, loved ones die, all things change. Your life now changes like the tides or the seasons. You are not alone in this change. Seek out others who have experienced relief from your problem of choice and let them guide you through it.
I can change my clothes and change my address but until I change myself, I cannot grow.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you want to feel better, clean house. If you want to get better, find God.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I have the courage to own my own unhappiness, daring to look within to discover its source. Today I treat myself as a friend, with gentleness and acceptance.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
An alcoholic who stops drinking, is like the guy who jumps into the water only to find that he can't swim. And AA isn't the water you jump into when your pants are on fire, AA is a bunch of idiots in a life boat with charred britches who come along and give swimming lessons. - Doug D.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 23, 2017 19:53:31 GMT -5
February 24
Daily Reflections
A THANKFUL HEART
I try to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot entertain great conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one's heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, the finest emotion that we can ever know. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 37
My sponsor told me that I should be a grateful alcoholic and always have "an attitude of gratitude"--that gratitude was the basic ingredient of humility, that humility was the basic ingredient of anonymity, and that "anonymity was the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." As a result of his guidance, I start every morning on my knees, thanking God for three things: I'm alive, I'm sober, and I'm a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. Then I try to live an "attitude of gratitude" and thoroughly enjoy another twenty-four hours of the A.A. way of life. A.A. is not something I joined; it's something I live.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When we came to our first A.A. meeting, we looked up at the wall at the end of the room and saw the sign: " But for the Grace of God." We knew right then and there that we would have to call on the grace of God in order to get sober and get over our soul-sickness. We heard speakers tell how they had come to depend on a Power greater than themselves. That made sense to us and we made up our minds to try it. Am I depending on the grace of God to help keep me sober?
Meditation For The Day
Share your love, your joy, your happiness, your time, your food, your money gladly with all. Give out all the love you can with a glad, free heart and hand. Do all you can for others and back will come countless stores of blessings. Sharing draws others to you. Take all who come as sent by God and give them a royal welcome. You may never see the results of your sharing. Today they may not need you, but tomorrow may bring results from the sharing you did today.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may make each visitor desire to return. I pray that I may never make anyone feel repulsed or unwanted.
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As Bill Sees It
Seeking Guidance, p. 55
"Man is supposed to think, and act. He wasn't made in God's image to be an automation.
"My own formula along this line runs as follows: First, think through every situation pro and con, praying meanwhile that I be not influenced by ego considerations. Affirm that I would like to do God's will.
"Then, having turned the problem over in this fashion and getting no conclusive or compelling answer, I wait for further guidance, which may come into mind directly or through other people or through circumstances.
"If I feel I can't wait, and still get no definite indication, I repeat the first measure several times, try to pick out the best course, and then proceed to act. I know if I am wrong, the heavens won't fall. A lesson will be learned, in any case."
Letter, 1950
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Walk In Dry Places
Selfishness____Self-improvement We're told again and again that we have to be selfish about our own recovery, but this seems to be in conflict with the fact that selfishness is the root of our problem. How can selfishness be both good and bad? The selfishness we need for recovery is a devotion to self-improvement, rather than the selfish indulgence that made us sick. One is a giving of ourselves, the other is frantic taking that leads to destruction. The person who seeks self-improvement is competing only against his or her former self. The sick brand of selfishness, on the other hand, is usually involved in unhealthy competition with others. There is no easy way to test whether our selfishness is the right kind. If our conduct leads to long-term happiness and higher self-esteem, it is probably right. If it harms us or others, something is wrong. We can correct this by getting back to the basics of the program and pursing self-improvement rather than self-indulgence. Just for today, I will take part in that which will obviously benefit everyone.
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Keep It Simple
Failure is impossible. ---Susan B. Anthony Failure is an attitude. Having an attitude of failure can't help us. It can only hurt us. If we're not careful, it can grow into a way of life. So, when we feel like failures, we better look at our attitudes. An attitude of failure often comes from making mistakes. But we can learn to see our mistakes as lessons. This turns mistakes into gains, not failures. Sometimes, we try to do things that just can't be done. When we act like we know everything, we're going to fail. if we try to act like God, we're going to fail. We can't control others. We can't know everything. We're not God. We're human. If we act human, we've already won. Prayer for the Day: Higher power, help me to learn from my attitudes. Whatever the outcome, help me learn. Action for the Day: Facing our past "failures" is the first step to learning from them. I'll talk to my sponsor about a past "failure" and the good that came from it.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder. --Virginia Woolf Anguish is undoubtedly more familiar to us than is the beauty of laughter. We feel anguish over our failings; we feel anguish over our losses; we feel anguish over the attempts to succeed that beckon to us. Anguish comes of fear. And we so hope to avoid it. However, it seasons us as women; it enriches us even while it momentarily diminishes us. It is a major contributor to the sum and substance of our lives. The anguish we experience prepares us to help others experience their own particular anguish. Our laughter, too, must be savored and shared. And laughter builds more laughter. Laughter lends a perspective on our anguish. Life is made richer, fuller, by the ebb and flow, the laughter and the anguish in concert. If only we could remember, when the anguish is present, that it is making our Spirits whole. That it, along with laughter, is a healer of the soul. That it lifts our load at the same time that it burdens us. That it prepares us to better receive life's other gifts. I can help another face anguish. It brings us together. It softens me. And it makes way for the laughter soon to come.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
If this kind of approach does not catch your husband’s interest, it may be best to drop the subject, but after a friendly talk your husband will usually revive the topic himself. This may take patient waiting, but it will be worth it. Meanwhile you might try to help the wife of another serious drinker. If you act upon these principles, your husband may stop or moderate.
p. 112
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
My father joined Alcoholics Anonymous when I was seven. Many of my childhood Friday nights were spent at open A.A. meetings because we couldn't afford a babysitter (I was the kid sitting over in the corner with a book). What effect did it have? I knew that being an alcoholic meant you couldn't drink any more and that you had to go to A.A. As my drinking career began, I was always careful not to utter the "A" word in connection with my name. At my house I would have been handed a meeting schedule. Besides, I knew that A.A. was all old guys that drank coffee, smoked, and ate donuts--I had been there. (Looking back, I'm sure most of those "old guys" were barely thirty.) So no A.A. for me. That would mean not drinking. And when I drank, life changed.
pp. 512-513
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
When A.A. was still young, lots of eager groups were forming. In a town we'll call Middleton, a real crackerjack had started up. The townspeople were as hot as firecrackers about it. Stargazing, the elders dreamed of innovations. They figured the town needed a great big alcoholic center, a kind of pilot plant A.A. groups could duplicate everywhere. Beginning on the ground floor there would be a club; in the second story they would sober up drunks and hand them currency for the back debts; the third deck would house an educational project - quite noncontroversial, of course. In imagination the gleaming center was to go up several stories more, but three would do for a start. This would all take a lot of money - other people's money. Believe it or not, wealthy townsfolk bought the idea.
p. 147
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If I linger with half truths, alibis, excuses, I will reap the consequences.
Hold your head high. Rise above the situation. A new day is dawning. Look forward to a better time. You have done your best. Forget the rest. This is growth. We struggle, we learn, we overcome. --Author Unknown
Words you speak can be your best attribute or your worst weapon. It's up to you on how you decide to use them. Remember though, it only takes once to say the wrong thing forever.
A smile is a gift you give to someone else.
We all have a "bad" day every once in a while. Your strength is determined by whether or not you let that "bad" day ruin your day.
Being thoughtful only takes a moment of your time. Being thoughtless will require more in explanations and apologies.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SELF
"Wherever two people meet, there are really six people present. There is each man as he sees himself, each man as the other person sees him, and each man as he really is." -- William James
Part of my spiritual journey involves the discovery of "self". For years I pretended to be what I was not; for years I pretended to be what I imagined myself to be; for years I pretended to be what you wanted me to be --- always my real "self" eluded me.
Today I am beginning to know myself. I know my needs. I understand my strengths. I accept my weaknesses and I live with my confusions. >From the time I decided to put down the glass of alcohol, it progressively got better --- but there is still a great deal I do not understand. Man's inhumanity to man, the daily violence and suffering, my own personal greed, cowardice and arrogance --- where does it come from? I don't know and today that is okay. However, I still search; my suspicion is that the answer lies within my own insecurities.
In Your time, Master, may I grow in my understanding of self.
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"Truly, I say to you, whoever says to the mountain, 'Be taken up and cast into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it and it will be yours." Mark 11:23-24
"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." I Corinthians 10:13
"See what love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and that is what we are.... Beloved, we are God's children now." 1 John 3:1-2
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Daily Inspiration
When you follow God's way, your life will flourish according to His great plan for you. Lord, guide me and make me aware of the ways You are working in my life.
Use the power of positive images in your mind to bring about good experiences. Lord, I will let my faith in You nourish my thoughts so that I can develop a healthy and joyful reality.
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NA Just For Today
A New Influence
"Personality change was what we really needed. Change from self-destructive patterns of life became necessary." Basic Text, p. 15
In early life, most of us were capable of joy and wonder, of giving and receiving unconditional love. When we started
using, we introduced an influence into our lives that slowly drove us away from those things. The further we were
pushed down the path of addiction, the further we withdrew from joy, wonder, and love.
That journey was not taken overnight. But however long it took, we arrived at the doors of NA with more than just a
drug problem. The influence of addiction had warped our whole pattern of living beyond recognition.
The Twelve Steps work miracles, its true, but not many of them are worked overnight. Our disease slowly influenced
our spiritual development for the worse. Recovery introduces a new influence to our lives, a source of fellowship and
spiritual strength slowly impelling us into new, healthy patterns of living.
This change, of course, doesn't "just happen." But if we cooperate with the new influence NA has brought to our lives,
over time we will experience the personality change we call recovery. The Twelve Steps provide us with a program for
the kind of cooperation required to restore joy, wonder, and love to our lives.
Just for today: I will cooperate with the new influence of fellowship and spiritual strength NA has introduced to my life, I
will work the next step in my program.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Thoughts--just mere thoughts--are as powerful as electric batteries--as good for one as sunlight is, or as bad for one
as poison. --Frances Hodgson Burnett The truck was in mud to its axles. Three lumberjacks sat in stony silence in the cab. There they were, stuck in the
woods on their way to the cutting site. The first man slammed the steering wheel, cursed, and stormed out of the
truck. The second thought the early morning woods inviting, and said he'd just crawl under a pine to nap until
someone came along to pull them out. The third man, left alone, grabbed an axe and a saw and set about cutting
wood to slide under the wheels. Within an hour he managed to pull the truck out of its muddy bath and they got on
their way. We can choose how we respond to an obstacle. As with the three men, our response may be to curse and give up, to
sit back and wait for someone else to help us, or to set to work fearlessly to try to overcome it ourselves. The event
itself isn't important; how we think about it is. Is there an obstacle in my way today
You are reading from the book Touchstones. It doesn't happen all at once.... You become. It takes a long time. --Margery Williams Our spiritual awakening is partly a process of becoming real. We're moving from the external controls of image and
others' opinions to the internal controls of honesty, listening to our inner voice, and having true relationships. We are
shedding the games that maintained our old style of life - "macho" or "hero" or "poor me." In place of the old phony surface, we are developing a real relationship with ourselves. We are becoming more aware
- of emotions, of need for rest, of violations of our values. Sometimes change comes in a flash of insight or a moment
of sudden, piercing awareness, but more often it comes a little bit at a time. As we work the Steps, as we are true to
our inner voice, as we keep returning to conscious contact with our Higher Power, as we get closer to our friends, we
become more real to ourselves. As I grow, I see that I was always real. I was just looking at the outside.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Recognizing Feelings Experiencing feelings can be a challenge if we've had no previous experience or permission to do that. Learning to
identify what we're feeling is a challenge we can meet, but we will not become experts overnight. Nor do we have to
deal with our feelings perfectly. Here are some ideas that might be helpful as you learn to recognize and deal with feelings. Take out a sheet of paper. On the top of it write, "If it was okay to feel whatever I'm feeling, and I wouldn't be judged as
bad or wrong, what would I be feeling?" Then write whatever comes to mind. You can also use the favorite standby of
many people in discovering their feelings: writing or journaling. You can keep a diary, write letters you don't intend to
send, or just scribble thoughts onto a note pad. Watch and listen to yourself as an objective third person might. Listen to your tone of voice and the words you use.
What do you hear? Sadness, fear, anger, happiness? What is your body telling you? Is it tense and rigid with anger? Running with fear? Heavy with sadness and grief?
Dancing with joy? Talking to people in recovery helps too. Going to meetings helps. Once we feel safe, many of us find that we open up
naturally and with ease to our feelings. We are on a continual treasure hunt in recovery. One of the treasures we're seeking is the emotional part of
ourselves. We don't have to do it perfectly. We need only be honest, open, and willing to try. Our emotions are there,
waiting to share themselves with us. Today, I will watch myself and listen to myself as I go through my day. I will not fudge myself for what I'm feeling; I will
accept myself.
I am growing in my ability to trust what feels good and right. Today I can look with and wait until I know with my heart. -
-Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
There Is Power in Stillness
Our miracles and life’s magic don’t appear when we’re restless and frantic. The miracles and magic happen when
we’re still, quiet, calm, and trusting.
Each of us has favorite items and places that help to calm and quiet us. What stills our mind? A walk in the park, a
special place in the city, a quiet room? An old chenille robe? A rock, a cross, a picture, a lit candle?
Use these places and things to find that place of stillness in yourself. Find the power in stillness. It’s a power that
comes gently, like the morning sunrise or the evening stars.
Take time each day to seek out stillness, to find that sacred spot. Let your mind and soul be at ease. Don’t grasp and
grab for the magic and miracles. When you reside in that place of stillness, the joy, miracles, and magic you’re
seeking will find you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Seek the adventure in your life
...adventure is not made up of distant lands and mountaintops, rather it lies in one's readiness to exchange the
domestic hearth for an uncertain resting place. --Reinhold Messner, Free Spirit
It isn't necessary for us to travel the world in search of the next high mountain or wild, desolate place to find an
adventure. Adventure lies in our perspective and in our attitude. It is our approach to life, rather than the actual
circumstances of it, that determines how much adventure we have. Adventure for one person may mean seeking out
a dream that has been long neglected. Perhaps adventure for another means losing weight, changing an outgrown
image, getting sober, learning to be in a love relationship, or simply experiencing joy.
It's good to make ourselves comfortable, but don't get so comfortable in front of that hearth that you never want to
grow or change. Water that never moves become stagnant and poisoned; so it is with the human spirit. We are given
life to live.
Look at your life and see if there is some area where you,too, can seek out an uncertain resting place. Maybe work,
love, or an area of spiritual growth? Some new or long forgotten lesson is waiting to be discovered or rediscovered by
you.
Say woohoo. Be uncomfortable for a while. It's never too late to learn and experience something new.
God, instill in me a spirit of adventure as I pursue my life.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I can banish fear by realizing the truth. Am I afraid to be alone? This fear can be banished by the realization that I am
never alone, that god is always with me wherever I am and whatever I do. Am I afraid that I won’t have enough money
to meet my needs? this fear can be banished by the realization that god is my inexhaustible, unfailing resource, now
and always. Today I have the power to change fear into faith. Can I say with confidence, “I will trust, and will not be
afraid..”?
Today I Pray
That I may fear no evil, for God is with me. that I may learn to turn to my Higher Power when I am afraid. I pray
diligently that my faith in god and trust in what He has in store for me is strong enough to banish the fears that
undermine my courage.
Today I Will Remember
Turn fear into Faith.
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One More Day
The future is like heaven — everyone exalts it but no one wants to go there now. – James Baldwin
There are people called futurist who specialize in studying trends and attitudes and who then form theories as to what
the future will hold. Having a reasoned opinion about future needs is important for business, education, and industry.
It’s probably not so important for us. We work harder to understand today and to discover what this day can hold for
us.
We aren’t scientist or researchers; we are more like explorers who face uncharted territory. Each morning we’re
unaware of all teh events and surprises that lie ahead, but we are the only ones who can choose the direction this day
will take. We don’t want to and we don’t need to worry about the future because right now we have this gift of time to
use for ourselves and for those who are close to us.
I will glory in this day and fill it with living.
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One Day At A Time
~ ANIMAL TEACHERS ~
For perhaps if the truth were known, we’re all a little blind, a little deaf, a little handicapped, a little lonely, a little less than perfect. And if we can learn to appreciate and utilize the dog’s full potential, we will, together, make it in this life on earth. Charlotte Schwartz
So many times it feels that what we are being asked is too great. We can barely care for ourselves so how can we possibly reach out our hand to another? How many times have we cried out for someone else to please “handle it” because we just weren't able?
There are so many lessons that come by working with animals. They know nothing of dishonesty. They can't lie. They force us to be honest with ourselves. They depend on us completely, even when we feel we have nothing to give. And our reward? Unconditional love. There is something extra special about a rescued animal. It is as though they know that their life was in darkest peril and they have been saved. The gratitude shows in their eyes, their kisses of devotion, their entire being. Any kindness shown is rewarded. I think this is no different than a member of OA, especially the new members. Any kindness, and the gratitude flows. These newbies know they too have been saved. So perhaps the next time you feel you have nothing to offer, and that what you have been asked is too great, take a moment to reflect on the moment you were ‘saved’. How did you feel the first time someone reached out to you?
One day at a time... I can use the memory of my first encounters with OA to find the strength to reach out one more time. I know the rewards will be infinite. ~ Mary W. ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We do not want to be the arbiter of anyone's sex conduct. We all have sex problems. We'd hardly be human if we didn't. - Pg. 69 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
For awhile, you will have to adjust to every new day without your beloved and betrayed drug of choice. You will sometimes wonder, 'Will I ever get used to this?'
Each dawn heralds a new day and I must reinvest with new people and new principles. It is not easy but I emerge from the dark through the dawn of the 12 steps.
Inner Cleansing
I am in a process of healing. I am taking the time to allow my body to become clean and whole and as I do that, my mind seems to heal, too. Thoughts arise, thoughts I have blocked out during normal waking hours. They scare me, sometimes. Where are they coming from. Me? But as I allow them to come forward a curious thing happens. They become less threatening. They are, after all, just thoughts. They only really have power when I fear them and push them away. If I welcome them into the sun lit rooms of my mind, they sort of spread out and relax. They are just fears. Anxieties. Parts of me I don't want to know about. But today I understand that I cannot really keep secrets from me. Today I let these thoughts have room to breathe and as they do, a curious thing happens. They dissipate.
I awaken to my inner life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Our disease had so much control over our lives, that it not only made us do things we did not want to do, but would not let us do things that we wanted to.
My disease used to make my choices. Now I do.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you fail to change the person you were when you came in, that person will take you out!
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am growing in my ability to trust what feels good and right. Today I can look with and wait until I know with my heart.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If I'd known I was going to live this long I'd have taken better care of myself.' - Unknown origin.
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Really like to read the Alkie speaks, I so identify with it. This from the person who was in so much denial about being an alcoholic. I knew I was an addict, who came to realize she used alcohol like she used other substances. Yet I had to take it further than that, I had to take Step One, 100%, and I had to say that dreaded word 'alcoholic' and mean it.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 23, 2017 20:04:31 GMT -5
I can identify with many people, no matter what room you put me in because I have learned NOT to compare. The 12 Steps are a common denominator. A drug is a drug, no matter what form it takes. As I like to say, liquid, solid, or the flesh and blood variety, I am powerless over people, places, and things.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 25, 2017 0:13:47 GMT -5
February 25
Daily Reflections
THE CHALLENGE OF FAILURE
In God's economy, nothing is wasted. Through failure, we learn a lesson in humility which is probably needed, painful though it is. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 31
How thankful I am today, to know that all my past failures were necessary for me to be where I am now. Through much pain came experience and, in suffering, I became obedient. When I sought God, as I understand Him, He shared His treasured gifts. Through experience and obedience, growth started, followed by gratitude. Yes, then came peace of mind -- living in and sharing sobriety.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Some people find it hard to believe in a Power greater than themselves. But not to believe in such a Power forces us to atheism. It has been said that atheism is blind faith in the strange proposition that this universe originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere. That's practically impossible to believe. I think we all can agree that alcohol is a power greater than ourselves. It certainly was in my case. I was helpless before the power of alcohol. Do I remember the things that happened to me because of the power of alcohol?
Meditation For The Day
The spiritual and moral will eventually overcome the material and unmoral. That is the purpose and destiny of the human race. Gradually the spiritual is overcoming the material in our minds. Gradually the moral is overcoming the unmoral. Faith, fellowship, and service are cures for most of the ills of the world. There is nothing in the field of personal relationships that they cannot do.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may do my share in making a better world. I pray that I may be part of the cure for the ills of the world.
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As Bill Sees It
Facing Criticism, p. 56
Sometimes, we register surprise, shock, and anger when people find fault with A.A. We are apt to be disturbed to such an extent that we cannot benefit by constructive criticism.
This sort of resentment makes no friends and achieves no constructive purpose. Certainly, this is an area in which we can improve.
<< << << >> >> >>
It is evident that the harmony, security, and future effectiveness of A.A. will depend largely upon our maintenance of a thoroughly nonaggressive and pacific attitude in all our public relations. This is an exciting assignment, because in our drinking days we were prone to anger, hostility, rebellion, and aggression. And, even though we are now sober, the old patterns of behavior are to a degree still with us, always threatening to explode on any good excuse.
But we now know this, and therefore I feel confident that in the conduct of our public affairs we shall always find the grace to exert restraint.
1. Grapevine, July 1965 2. Twelve Concepts, p. 68
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Walk In Dry Places
Malicious Gossip____Honest Motives "Without really knowing what was happening, I said something bad today about a person I secretly resented. When it occurred to me that my remark could come back to hurt me, I had a moment of panic," an AA member said. "With little reflection, however, I realized that the more serious problem was the dishonesty that caused me to belittle somebody behind hie back!" We are growing up when we come to see that gossip feeds on our own insecurity and self-deception. When we are unwilling to part company with gossip, we devise subtle ways to keep it in our lives. We can gossip by steering the conversation to a topic that is likely to bring revealing comments. We also gossip by reveling in lurid accounts of others' sins and failings. We should even ask ourselves if we are gossiping when we "discuss" another member who is not living up to our ideas of true Twelve Step standards. This is often prefaced by the remark, "I don't want to take Joe's inventory, but….." We cannot live freely and happily if we practice gossip in any form. The practice may be hidden, but it leaves us with guilt, fear, and shame. We cannot gossip and be completely trustworthy and reliable. I will truly mind my own business today. Forgiving myself for past excursions into gossip, I will say nothing about others behind their backs. If somebody has gossip to share, I will politely move to another topic.
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Keep It Simple
Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.---Willaim James Step Two speaks of believing. For many years, we had given up believing in ourselves, in a Higher Power, and in others. We believed in getting high. Now our program tells us to believe in love. We are lovable, and we can love others without hurting them. Of course, believing is an important part of recovery. To believe means to put aside our doubts. To believe means to have hope. Believing makes the road a little smoother. So, believing lets the healing happen a little faster. All of this is how we get ready to let in the care of our Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: I pray for the courage to believe. I'll not let doubt into my heart. I can recover. I can give myself totally to this simple program. Action for the Day: I'll list four times doubt got in my way. And I'll think of what I can do to not let that happen again.
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Each Day a New Beginning
You need only claim the events of your life to make yourself yours. --Florida Scott-Maxwell The search is on. Everyone, everywhere, asks the question at some time, "Who am I?" Women like ourselves are fortunate to have this program. It shows us the way to self-discovery. It directs our steps to the celebration of self that is a gift of recovery. The events of our past may plague us. But they did contribute to the fullness we feel today. And for them, for their involvement in who we've become, we can be grateful. Claiming ourselves, the good and the bad, is healing. It's taking responsibility--for where we were and where we're going. Claiming ourselves makes us the active participants in our lives. The choices are many and varied. Not actively participating in life is also a choice. Passivity may have been our dominant choice in years gone by. But now, today, we are choosing recovery. We are choosing action that is healing, and wholeness is the result. Making myself mine, will exhilarate me. It will give me hope. It will prepare me for anything to come. I will know a new joy.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Suppose, however, that your husband fits the description of number two. The same principles which apply to husband number one should be practice. But after his next binge, ask him if he would really like to get over drinking for good. Do not ask that he do it for you or anyone else. Just would he like to?
p. 112
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
I was fifteen the first time I got drunk. I can tell you where I was, who I was with, what I was wearing. It was an important day for me. Within a year I was a poster child for adolescent treatment of alcoholism. My grades plunged, my friends changed, I wrecked a car, my appearance went downhill, I was suspended from school. (When I first got sober, I wondered why my parents never checked me into treatment. Then I remembered that didn't have adolescent treatment centers when I was a teen. As a matter of fact, I still have ceramics Dad made me in the psychiatric ward, because when he was drinking, they didn't have treatment centers.) I was always ready with a promise to do better, to try harder, to apply myself, to live up to my potential. Potential--now there is the curse of every budding alcoholic.
p. 513
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
There were, though, a few conservative dissenters among the alcoholics. the wrote the Foundation*, A.A.'s headquarters in New York, wanting to know about this sort of streamlining. They understood that the elders, just to nail things down good, were about to apply to the Foundation for a charter. These few were disturbed and skeptical.
*In 1954, The name of the Alcoholic Foundation, Inc. was changed to the General Service Board of Alcoholics Anonymous, Inc. and the Foundation office is now the General Service Office.
p. 148
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God, protect me from negative influences, which erode my beliefs. Help me protect myself. Surround me with that which is positive, edifying, and uplifting. --Melody Beattie
It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak. --Epictetus
Have compassion for yourself and others. Everyone is doing the best they can based on their life experiences. Everyone is learning and growing, and so are you. --HeartMath Discovery Program, Doc Childre and Sara Paddison
A great reform would take place in the world if we tried to live truth instead of preaching it.
"I have been given a quiet place in bright sunshine." --Bill W.
I am God's Melody of Life and He Sings His Song through me.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
AMBITION
"The child without ambition is like a watch with a broken spring." -- R. W. Stockman
It is not wrong to have ambition. It is not wrong to want to be "somebody". The tragedy is that this has to be said!
For too long we have played the tapes in our head that discouraged ambition and creative pride. We confused humility with timidity and self-abuse. We waited for things to happen, rather than made them happen.
Today I know that I am a creature of God --- created to create. God is at work in my life. I am part of His miracle for the world.
O God, may I always have ambition for those things that are good and true.
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"Keep on doing the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:9
Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us. Rom. 5:1-5
"So Jesus answered and said to them, Have faith in God." Mark 11:22
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Daily Inspiration
To receive the wonderful healing power of love, wish others well even when things aren't going so well for you. Lord, I rejoice in You always because You are blessing me daily no matter what my circumstances may be.
We are judged by our actions, not by our intentions. Lord, may I show my love for You through charity and goodness toward others.
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NA Just For Today
Sick As Our Secrets
"It would be tragic to write [out an inventory only to] shove it in a drawer These defects grow in the dark and die in the light of exposure." Basic Text, p. 31
How many times have we heard it said that we are only as sick as our secrets? While many members choose not to use meetings to share the intimate details of their lives, it is important that we each discover what works best for us. What about those behaviors we have carried into our recovery that, if discovered, would cause us shame? How much are we comfortable disclosing, and to whom? If we are uncomfortable sharing some details of our lives in meetings, to whom do we turn?
We have found the answer to these questions in sponsorship. Although a relationship with a sponsor takes time to build, it is important that we come to trust our sponsor enough to be completely honest. Our defects only have power as long as they stay hidden. If we want to be free of those defects, we must uncover them. Secrets are only secrets until we share them with another human being.
Just for today: I will uncover my secrets. I will practice being honest with my sponsor.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The most useless day of all is that in which we have not laughed. --Sebastian R. N. Champort We are told that laughter is sunshine filling a room. And where there is laughter, there also is life. They say that people who laugh a lot live longer than do the sour-faced. When we laugh together, gratitude comes more easily, companionship thrives, and all praise is sincere. Laughter brings us joy that cannot be bought. Such joy is with us throughout each day. To hoard joy, to hide it away deep within us away from others, will make us lonely misers. We cannot buy or trade for joy, but we can give or receive it as a gift. Laughter's joy celebrates the moment we are living right now. It is a gift we must share, or it will wither and die. Shared, it grows and thrives, and always returns to us when we need it most. What can I find to laugh about right now?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. Every time I dose the door on Reality, it comes in through the window. --Ashleigh Brilliant In the past many of us closed the door on the reality of our abuse of others or ourselves. We gave explanations, but our words more often hid the truth than revealed it. The chaos in our lives was reality coming in the window. Many men have come into this program priding themselves on their honesty, but not aware of how dishonest they were with themselves. Honesty is a pillar of spiritual awakening. There is no growth without it, and it begins with ourselves. We do not define the truth, we accept it, we surrender to it. The truth may not feel good; it can even be painful. This is the pain of birth - the rebirth of a real man. And the promise of this day is the reward of having our integrity and the peace of self-acceptance. Today, I will surrender to the truth. I will accept the reality, which presses for attention in my life.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Accepting Imperfection "Why do I do this to myself?" asked a woman who wanted to lose weight. "I went to my support group feeling so guilty and ashamed because I ate half a cookie that wasn't on the diet. I found out that everyone cheats a little, and some people cheat a lot. I felt so ashamed before I came to the group, as though I were the only one not doing my diet perfectly. Now I know that I'm dieting as well as most, and better than some." Why do we do this to ourselves? I'm not talking strictly about dieting; I'm talking about life. Why do we punish ourselves by thinking that we're inferior while believing that others are perfect - whether in relationships, recovery, or a specific task? Whether we're judging others, or ourselves it's two sides of the same coin: perfection. Neither expectation is valid. It is far more accurate and beneficial to tell ourselves that who we are is okay and what we are doing is good enough. That doesn't mean we won't make mistakes that need correcting; doesn't mean we won't get off track from time to time; doesn't mean we can't improve. It means with all our mistakes and wandering, we're basically on course. Encouraging and approving of ourselves is how we help ourselves stay on track. Today, I will love and encourage myself. I will tell myself that what I'm doing is good enough, and I'll let myself enjoy that feeling.
I will give myself the gift of time today and be quiet and hear with my heart. I will go to my special place inside where I really live in love and in joy and carry those feelings with me throughout the day. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Learn to Help Heal Yourself
I feel a heaviness in my lungs, almost a pain; the next day, I find myself crying, discharging old grief and sadness. On another occasion, I feel sharp pangs in my stomach; within days, denied rage begins to surface and the pain subsides. My head aches, pounds, throbs; hours later, I feel the fear I’ve been running from. I feel the energy in my body shifting, moving, taking new shape; over the next months, I’m led into a new cycle, a new season in my life.
Some of the pains and illnesses we suffer from are indications of acute physical problems. They’re signs that our body has broken down and we need medical attention. But many of the aches and pains we experience are symptoms of a deeper process– a process of healing and cleansing our heart and soul.
As we go through our daily experiences, circumstances will trigger this healing. Someone says something that makes us feel angry or afraid, which triggers a feeling similar to one we repressed years ago. Or a conversation causes us to remember something that hurt us long ago, and our body begins to release the pain of that old emotion. Sometimes, our aches and pains are signals that some emotion is ready to surface. We need to acknowledge the feeling, feel the energy. Let it pass through us, then watch for the lesson to appear and the pain to dissipate.
If we are committed to a path of spiritual growth, our bodies will soon begin to use everything that happens as a vehicle for healing. Trust yourself and listen, and you’ll know what to do. You’ll find healers and help that will support you as you continue to discover and trust your soul.
Remember to trust the simple everyday wisdom of your body. It’s a barometer for you soul.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Let God and your intuition lead the way
I define synchronicity as an external event which triggers an internal knowing. It has to do with events that are significant coincidences, such as when you are trying to solve a problem and someone “just happens” to call. During the conversation the caller “just happens” to give a clue or answer to the difficulty. –Nancy Rosanoff, Intuition Workout
I was talking to my friend Kyle one day. I was in the final stages of writing Playing It By Heart, but I didn’t know what the ending was. The book was an in-depth life review. I was astounded by the number of experiences I’ve had.
“I’ve been a pauper, a drug addict, a codepepndent, a mid-western housewife, a married woman, a single parent on welfare, a secretary, a journalist, a chemical dependency counselor, a book author, a bereaved parent, and a Californian. I’ve traveled to the Middle East, across the United States, ran a bookstore, and now, although I’ve taken the long hard road to get there, I live at the beach,” I said. “There’s nothing left for me to do.”
“I know one thing you want to do that you haven’t done yet,” Kyle said.
“What?” I asked. There was a long silence. I thought maybe he hung up.
“I know,” he said. “You’ve never jumped out of a plane.”
I forgot about the conversation. Within a few day, the phone rang. A man who had worked on my house about nine months before was on the line. He reintroduced himself. Then he explained why he called. He said he was a sky diver, and he asked if I’d like to go to the drop zone with him sometime, and maybe make a tandem jump.
A few months later, I went with him to Skydive Elsinore. I learned that day that jumping out of airplanes was something I very much wanted to do. And the skydiving experience was exactly the ending I needed for my book.
Trust your inner guidance. Our Higher Power works in mysterious ways. Listen to people, and watch for signs that trigger your inner knowing.
God, help me be open to all the ways you speak to me to help guide me along my path.
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Hard Learned Lessons Bad Days
We all have days from time to time when it feels like the world is against us or that the chaos we are experiencing will never end. One negative circumstance seems to lead to another. You may wonder, on a bad day, whether anything in your life will ever go right again. But a bad day, like any other day, can be a gift. Having a bad day can show you that it is time to slow down, change course, or lighten up. A bad day can help you glean wisdom you might otherwise have overlooked or discounted. Bad days can certainly cause you to experience uncomfortable feelings you would prefer to avoid, yet a bad day may also give you a potent means to learn about yourself.
You may consider a bad day to be one where you’ve missing an important meeting because your car stalled, the dryer broke, and you received a piece of very bad news earlier in the morning. Multiple misfortunes that take place one after the other can leave us feeling vulnerable and intensely cognizant of our fragility. But bad days can only have a long-term negative effect on us if we let them. It is better to ask yourself what you can learn from these kinds of days. The state of your bad day may be an indicator that you need to stay in and hibernate or let go of your growing negativity.
Bad days contribute to the people we become. Though we may feel discouraged and distressed on our bad days, a bad day can teach us patience and perseverance. It is important to remember that your attitude drives your destiny and that one negative experience does not have to be the beginning of an ongoing stroke of bad luck. A bad day is memorable because it is one day among many good days – otherwise, we wouldn’t even bother to acknowledge it as a bad day. Know too, that everybody has bad days, you are not alone, the world is not against you. Tomorrow is guaranteed to be a brighter day. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Before we came to The Program, fear ruled our lives. Tyrannized by our addictions and obsessions, we feared everything and everybody. We feared ourselves and, perhaps most of all, feared fear itself. these days, when I am able to accept the help of my Higher Power, it makes me feel capable of doing anything I am called to do. I am overcoming my fears and acquiring a comfortable new confidence. Can I believe that “courage is fear that has said its prayers…”?
Today I Pray
God grant that through faith in Him I may overcome my obsessive fears. I have been running scared for so long it has become a habit. God help me to see that I may be purposely clinging to my fears to avoid making decisions, perhaps even to shirk the responsibility of success.
Today I Will Remember
Fear keeps me safe from risk-taking.
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One More Day
He who attempts to resist the wave is swept away, but he who bends before it abides. – Leviticus
Just as water transforms the definition of the shoreline, so can our changing health patterns alter the boundaries of our days. What looked and felt normal before may be entirely alien now.
In various stages of life, we’ve repeatedly demonstrated our ability to adapt to new situations. Marriage, children, new jobs all call for personal change. Add to these everyday occurrences a chronic medical condition (physical or emotional) and we may feel we are drowning. Perhaps at these times, we can disengage ourselves from the moment, reassess the past, and recall how well we’ve handled the changes life has demanded. We have been adaptable, and we can continue to be.
Creating a new pattern of living is definitely within my reach.
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One Day At A Time
~ STARTING OVER ~
Vitality shows not only in the ability to persist, but in the ability to start over. F. Scott Fitzgerald
Before coming into this program I was, and probably still am to a certain extent, a perfectionist, so one of the things I really struggled with is being able make mistakes without feeling bad about myself. So when I came into the program, I decided that I was going to do this program perfectly, and proceeded to do just that. I followed a meal plan, lost weight and worked the steps, and I really thought I had it made. But I hadn't counted on the fact that this is a disease, and it is both cunning, baffling and powerful. So when I had my first slip, I was devastated and felt a real failure.
Fortunately for me, with the help of many loving sponsors over the years, I have realized that I am not a failure if I slip, but I am only one if I fail to get up. This program has enabled me to learn that when I make a mistake, I am not that mistake, and that all I need to do is to pick myself up and start over. In the old days if I failed at a diet, I would never have been able to pick myself up so soon, and it would always be an excuse to carry on eating and start the diet again on Monday. Now I know that my abstinence can even start at the end of the day, rather than waiting till tomorrow, next week or even next month. I am slowly starting to let go of the guilt I feel when I slip, and am also learning to love myself even when I do flounder, because with the love and support I am given in this program, I know I can always start over.
One day at a time... I will remember that I can start afresh any time I like, and don't need to feel as if I have failed. ~ Sharon ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We avoid retaliation or argument. - Pg. 67 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
I only have one character defect left and it's just that I think about myself **** near all the time.
Seeing Deeply
Every day I experience another piece of myself. Yes I am laid low, but at the same time worlds are opening up to me on the inside. My body is struggling to heal and so is the rest of me. I am watching myself deepen inside and become more aware. It is forced upon me by illness, but I cannot help but being a little bit grateful for the time to slow down and go within. I am seeing the subtleties of life, I am watching myself watch the world around me. I have a witness inside that is constantly with me but I seldom take time to be with it. As I witness my own thoughts, I learn about who I am inside, what makes me tick. As I watch myself interact with others, I see how I act in relationships. As I notice the little things, life seems to matter more.
I am renewing my relationship with life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The spiritual journey is one of continually falling on your face, getting up, brushing yourself off, looking sheepishly at God, and taking another step.
If I'm faced in the right direction, and fall on my face, I've still made progress.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Actions speak louder than bumper stickers.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I will give myself the gift of time today and be quiet and hear with my heart. I will go to my special place inside where I really live in love and in joy and carry those feelings with me throughout the day.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I never let go of anything that didn't have my claw marks on it. - Tony B.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 26, 2017 1:09:12 GMT -5
February 26
Daily Reflections
NO ORDINARY SUCCESS STORY
A.A. is no success story in the ordinary sense of the word. It is a story of suffering transmuted, under grace, into spiritual progress. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 35
Upon entering A.A. I listened to others talk about the reality of their drinking: loneliness, terror and pain. As I listened further, I soon heard a description of a very different kind--the reality of sobriety. It is a reality of freedom and happiness, of purpose and direction, and of serenity and peace with God, ourselves and others. By attending meetings, I am reintroduced to that reality, over and over. I see it in the eyes and hear it in the voices of those around me. By working the program I find the direction and strength with which to make it mine. The joy of A.A. is that this new reality is available to me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When we came into A.A., we came to believe in a Power greater than ourselves. We came to believe in that Divine Principle in the universe which we call God, and to whom we could turn for help. Each morning we have a quiet time. We ask God for the power to stay sober for the next twenty-four hours. And each night we thank Him for helping us to keep sober for that day. Do I believe that each man or woman I see in A.A. is a demonstration of the power of God to change a human being from a drunkard to a sober person?
Meditation For The Day
I should pray for more faith as a thirsty man prays for water in a desert. Do I know what it means to feel sure that God will never fail me? Am I sure of this as I am sure that I still breathe? I should pray daily and most diligently that my faith may increase. There is nothing lacking in my life because really all I need is mine, only I lack the faith to know it. I am a king's son who sits in rags and yet all around me are stores of all I could desire.
Prayer For The Day
I pray for the realization that God has everything I need. I pray that I may know that His power is always available.
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As Bill Sees It
Better Than Gold, p. 57
As newcomers, many of us have indulged in spiritual intoxication. Like a gaunt prospector, belt drawn in over the last ounce of food, we saw our pick strike gold. Joy at our release from a lifetime of frustration knew no bounds.
The newcomer feels he has struck something better than gold. He may not see at once that he has barely scratched the limitless lode which will pay dividends only if he mines it for the rest of his life and insists on giving away the entire product.
Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 128-129
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Walk In Dry Places
The Fix that Never was_____ Recovery In all of the despair and defeat that went along with drinking, most of us held to the ideal of a "fantastic fix"----- a drinking experience so fulfilling and complete that it would solve our problems and leave us searching no more. Compulsive disorders, like alcoholism, seem to include this delusion. The gambler looks for the big score, the overeater seeks the total enjoyment of food, and the sex junkie searches for the perfect partner. But the search never ends, because our compulsions always drive us to seek stronger wine and greater excitement. The only fix that will ever work has to be rooted in sobriety and right living. When we think and live properly, free from alcohol, we find a fix that really works. We find continuous satisfaction instead of soaring excitement, sound relationships with other people instead of ego-gratifying encounters, and purpose instead of drifting. The peak experience we had been seeking is a fix that never can be. We can be truly "fixed" only by staying sober. I will live calmly and gratefully today, forgetting the drive for excitement that was destroying me. My Higher Power knows who I am and what I should be doing.
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Keep It Simple
Forewarned. forearmed: being prepared is half the victory.---Miguel de Cervantes Ther will be hard times in our program. There will be hard times in our lives. That's the way the life is. It helps if we accept this. Then we can prepare for tough times. We can prepare by getting a good set of habits and sticking to them. We can make it a habit to give time to our program each day. Sticking to good habits is like having a savings account: when hard times come, we can take the "investment" we've made and overcome our problems. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me accept that there will be hard times. Help me prepare for them. With Your help, I'll stay close to You, my friends, and the program. Action for the Day: I'll put something into my program "savings account" today. I'll make that extra call. I'll read a little longer or go to an extra meeting.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Happiness is a byproduct of an effort to make someone else happy. --Gretta Brooker Palmer We have striven for happiness, generally in self-centered ways. We expected others to favor us with their attention, for example. Or we waited for invitations or gifts. We have probably tried to buy happiness with the purchase of a new dress or shoes. Fleeting moments of happiness were gained, that's all. And soon we were discontent once again. And the search was begun anew. But things have changed for some of us. We are learning, maybe slowly, how to find a more permanent happiness. And we know the happiness that comes from "getting" is elusive. Giving to others, giving attention, sharing hope, sharing our own stories, listening to theirs, is the key to finding the happiness for which we've searched so long. We must get outside of ourselves and focus on another's joy or sorrow. Only then do we get a clear perspective on who we are and the necessary role we play in the lives of others who need our attention and who have a message we also need to hear. The creative power stirring in me needs recognition. Looking deeply into another person, listening intently to the stirring will elicit joy. I will feel in touch with my own creative power, a lasting thrill, not a fleeting moment of happiness.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
The chances are he would. Show him your copy of this book and tell him what you have found out about alcoholism. Show him that as alcoholics, the writers of the book understand. Tell him some of the interesting stories you have read. If you think he will be shy of a spiritual remedy, ask him to look at the chapter on alcoholism. Then perhaps he will be interested enough to continue.
pp. 112-113
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
I managed to graduate somehow and went on to college, when I promptly flunked out. I couldn't make it to class. Hindsight has shown me two reasons for this. First, if someone else had a free period, I tagged along with them. I thought that I had to be with my friends all the time. I was afraid that if they spent any time without me, they night begin to wonder, Why do I hang out with her anyway? They might realize that had a better time without me. And then they might tell other people, who would tell other people, and I'd be alone.
pp. 513-514
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
Of course, there was a promoter in the deal - a super-promoter. By his eloquence he allayed all fears, despite advice from the Foundation that it could issue no charter, and that ventures which mixed an A.A. group with medication and education had come to sticky ends elsewhere. To make things safer, the promoter organized three corporations and became president of them all. Freshly painted, the new center shone. The warmth of it all spread through the town. Soon things began to hum. to insure foolproof, continuous operation, sixty-one rules and regulations were adopted.
p. 148
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This is a great day to be sober, patient, tolerant, kindly and loving.
A positive attitude is a person's passport to a better tomorrow. --Anon
Gratitude is our most direct line to God and the angels. If we take the time, no matter how crazy and troubled we feel, we can find something to be thankful for. The more we seek gratitude, the more reason the angels will give us for gratitude and joy to exist in our lives. --Terry Lynn Taylor
God, help me learn to respond to whatever environment I'm in by taking the appropriate actions to take care of myself. --Melody Beattie
Every new day is the beginning of the rest of your life. On each day you can make new choices on how to live it.
No matter what the season, God is with us. --George J. Waggoner
God's love reaches us wherever we are. --Karen Christy Kurtz
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
UNIQUENESS
"Each honest calling, each walk of life, has its own elite, its own aristocracy based upon excellence of performance." -- James Bryant Conant
Everybody has a gift and a special feature that is unique to themselves. Unfortunately so many people are so busy admiring the gifts of others that they miss their own; they are so caught up in the lives of others that they miss the "specialness" of their own existence. One of the symptoms of my alcoholism was low self-esteem. Of course I acted a role of confidence. I pretended that everything was okay. I wore the mask of success --- but deep within myself, I was always waiting for the world to find out that I was a fake, that something was missing in my life.
In recovery I have discovered God's powerful gift of spirituality and I know that through my life a uniqueness exists in the world. I have the capacity to make the day better --- not only for myself but also for others.
Thank You for the "specialness" of my life.
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Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. James 1:19-20
"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Proverbs 12:18
We love because [God] first loved us. 1 John 4:19
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Daily Inspiration
Lift yourself above the seriousness of life by keeping a gentle sense of humor. Lord, You have made me one of a kind. Help me to enjoy who I am.
No one can live for himself alone for then he will have no purpose in life. To give of self is one of life's greatest joys and blesses us with a full and rich life. Lord, help me to be selfless and loving to those around me.
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NA Just For Today
Remorse
"The Eighth Step offers a big change from a life dominated by guilt and remorse." Basic Text, p. 38
Remorse was one of the feelings that kept us using. We had stumbled our way through active addiction, leaving a trail of heartbreak and devastation too painful to consider. Our remorse was often intensified by our perception that we couldn't do anything about the damage we had caused; there was no way to make it right.
We remove some of the power of remorse when we face it squarely. We begin the Eighth Step by actually making a list of all the people we have harmed. We own our part in our painful past.
But the Eighth Step does not ask us to make right all of our mistakes, merely to become willing to make amends to all those people. As we become willing to clean up the damage we've caused, we acknowledge our readiness to change. We affirm the healing process of recovery.
Remorse is no longer an instrument we use to torture ourselves. Remorse has become a tool we can use to achieve self-forgiveness.
Just for today: I will use any feelings of remorse I may have as a stepping-stone to healing through the Twelve Steps.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. From harmony, from heavenly harmony, This universal frame began . . . --John Dryden Our family is like a small orchestra. Each of us has an important part to play. To achieve harmony we tune in to how others are sounding. We recognize that every orchestra needs a conductor, a center for direction. We rely on our Higher Power for this support and guidance, and we realize that our family's music exists in time. It changes, it passes, and we begin a new song. Our music comes and goes. It is not carved in marble. It is a free expression of family love. No one of us has to play alone, because we are an ensemble. The time for soloing comes later. Today we rejoice that we can play together. How can my music add to the family's symphony today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. I have never for one instant seen clearly within myself. How then would you nave me judge the deeds of others? --Maurice Maeterlinck We have been given the job of getting to know ourselves and dealing with our own craziness. We aren't so good at it that we have spare time and energy left to make judgments about those around us. We are tempted to become absorbed in their behavior and choices, and it does feel like a welcome distraction from anxieties about ourselves. So we must learn to detach from the family members and friends that we are tempted to fix, or monitor, or judge. Although we are very close, we are on separate paths in life. We were not born together, and we will not die together. We will make our family or our friendships and the world a little bit better by staying centered on our own sanity. I pray for a clear separation between what is on my path in this program and what is on someone else's path. Then we can make good bridges between us.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Twelve Step Programs I was furious when I found myself at my first Al Anon meeting. It seemed so unfair that he had the problem and I had to go to a meeting. But by that time, I had nowhere left in the world to go with my pain. Now, I'm grateful for Al Anon and my codependency recovery. Al Anon keeps me on track; recovery has given me a life. --Anonymous There are many Twelve Step programs for codependents: Al Anon, Adult Children of Alcoholics, CoDa, Families Anonymous, Nar-Anon, and more. We have many choices about which kind of group is right for us and which particular group in that category meets our needs. Twelve Step groups for codependents are free, anonymous, and available in most communities. If there is not one that is right for us, we can start one. Twelve Step groups for codependents are not about how we can help the other person; they're about how we can help ourselves grow and change. They can help us accept and deal with the ways codependency has affected us. They can help us get on track and stay there. There is magic in Twelve Step programs. There is healing power in connecting with other recovering people. We access this healing power by working the Steps and by allowing them to work on us. The Twelve Steps are a formula for healing. How long do we have to go to meetings? We go until we "get the program." We go until the program "gets us." Then we keep on going and growing. Selecting a group and then attending regularly are important ways we can begin and continue to take care of ourselves. Actively participating in our recovery program by working the Steps is another. I will be open to the healing power available to me from the Twelve Steps and a recovery program.
It is safe to know there is a special place within me where I can feel peace. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Embrace the Lessons of Night
I reached Wyoming’s Yellowstone Park late, much later than I had planned. The park was sprawling. I wasn’t certain how to find the lodge. I couldn’t find anyone to ask for help or directions. Tired and exhausted, I couldn’t make sense of the map. I found myself driving around and around, becoming almost frantic.
Suddenly, beyond the treetops, I spotted a bright light. Good, I thought, it must be the lodge. I drove a little further, then stopped the car and stared in awe. What I saw stilled my heart, and calmed my frantic pace.
Above Yellowstone Lake, nestled between two mountain peaks, glowed a huge, white, full moon, the largest I’d ever seen it. The pines stood guard, quiet and still. A light layer of snow and ice frosted the lake’s surface. I pulled to the side of the road and watched the moon set. It was the single most beautiful, breathtaking scene of the journey.
I would never have seen this scene in the daytime. I would never have seen this moon, had I not gotten lost. I would never have seen it, had it not been this particular time of night. So maybe I’m not lost, I thought. And maybe I’m not late. Maybe what I’m really doing is taking a beautiful evening drive.
When we’re lost, when the way gets dark, sometimes we see things we never would have seen in the daylight. Sometimes, the lessons we learn in the darkness are breathtakingly beautiful.
Enjoy the sunshine, but trust the darkness,too. It is more than to be endured. It is to be experienced, and later cherished.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Open the door to fun experiences
You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm. –Colette
It was nighttime. A light breeze ruffled through my hair as I sat on the bench looking out over the lights of Las Vegas. How did I get here agaiin? I thought. Then I remembered. It had been another of Chip’s wrong turns that had led us from southern California into the unknown.
The man wrapped a thick cloth around my ankles and then attached the cord to it. Another backup cord ran to the harness around my waist.
I was on a tower 150 feet above the ground getting ready to bungee jump. By my feet. At night. In vegas. Again.
Sometimes the first step is the hardest. Sometimes it’s the second step that gets you. The thing about a new experience is that you have no expectations, there is no frame of reference. But the second time. … I remembered the feeling of looking down off the platform to the ground below, the unnatural, terrifying step into nothingness, then my stomach jumping up into my chest, the long second when time seemed to freeze, the plunge toward the ground, and the tug of the cord slowing me. I remembered the rebound, the hanging there, waiting to be pulled back up. I remembered it all, and it grew in my mind. And besides, this time it was night, and I was going to be hanging by my feet.
I walked to the edge of the platform. I wasn’t holding on. But I was shaking.
“5-4-3-2-1- go!” came the count. I closed my eyes and let myself fall.
And I laughed and I screamed, and I laughed at myself for screaming. It was fun.
Later, as we headed farther down the road, farther away from home on another intuitive road trip, I was still smiling.
Growth is self-perpetuating. Each new experience opens the door for further experiences. Today, remember something that you may have done only once, something you liked; then do it again. Allow your mind to fill you with uncertainty as you remember all of the experiences of the first time. It doesn’t have to be work-related. Maybe you went to a play instead of watching TV. Camped in the woods. Or wrote a poem. Find something that was fun, and do it again. Then, bring that feeling back to your ordinary world. Bring the woohoo of the second time into the third, forth, and fifth times that you do a thing.
Keep the life in your life.
God, please remind me of some fun, interesting things that I like to do. Then help me get out of my chair and do them.
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Dark Night of the Soul Surrendering the Ego
by Madisyn Taylor
While we are in a dark night of the soul experience, hold steady knowing the light will appear once again.
Whenever a word is overused, it is most likely being misused, and over time, it begins to lose its meaningfulness. For example, we often refer to a fleeting feeling of depression or a period of confusion, as a dark night of the soul, but neither of these things qualifies as such. A dark night of the soul is a very specific experience that some people encounter on their spiritual journeys. There are people who never encounter a dark night of the soul, but others must endure this as part of the process of breaking through to the dawn of higher consciousness.
The dark night of the soul invites us to fully recognize the confines of our egos’ identity. We may feel as if we are trapped in a prison that affords us no access to light or the outside. We are coming from a place of higher knowing, and we may have spent a lot of time and energy reaching toward the light of higher consciousness. This is why the dark night has such a quality of despair: We are suddenly shut off from what we thought we had realized and the emotional pain is very real. We may even begin to feel that it was all an illusion and that we are lost forever in this darkness. The more we struggle, the darker things get, until finally we surrender to our not knowing what to do, how to think, where to turn. It is from this place of losing our sense of ourselves as in control that the ego begins to crack or soften and the possibility of light entering becomes real.
Some of us will have to endure this process only once in our lives, while others may have to go through it many times. The great revelation of the dark night is the releasing of our old, false identity. We finally give up believing in this false self and thus become capable of owning and embracing the light. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“What if…” How often we hear these words from newcomers to The Program. How often, in fat,we tend to say them ourselves. “What if I lose my job?” “What if my car breaks down?” What if I get sick and can’t work?” “What if my child gets hooked on drugs?” What if — anything our desperate imaginings can project. Only two small words, yet how heavy-laden they are with dread, fear and anxiety. The answer to “What if…” is, plainly and simply, “Don’t project.” We can only live with our problems as they arise, living one day at a time. Am I keeping my thoughts positive?
Today I Pray
May I grow spiritually, without being held back by anxieties. May projected fears not hobble my pursuits or keep me from making the most of today. May I turn out fear by faith. If I will only make a place for God within me, He will remove my fears.
Today I Will Remember
I can only borrow trouble at high interest rates.
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One More Day
I shall not pass this way again; Then let me now relieve some pain, Remove some barrier from the road, Or brighten someone’s heavy load. – Eva Rose York
Sometimes we help other through – neighborhood clean-up committees, recycling stations, and paint-a-tons. Maybe we’ve volunteered through school or church or community organizations.
Illness has helped us better understand the relationship between those who help and those who need help. Loving help is not prompted by pity or superiority, but by empathy and shared humanness. Also, we’ve learned that no one is always the helper or always the one needing help. We are both. We are bonded to others through what we give — and what we receive.
I will show my love by helping and being willing to be helped.
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One Day At A Time
~ MEMORIES ~
Some memories are realities ... and are better than anything that can ever happen to one again. Willa Cather
When one is young, the world is large and the thought of exploring it is exciting. Each year that we live we add to our memory chest ... and by middle age those memories are substantial. I have found as I have grown older that I remember more of the good things that have happened in my life than the bad. The good things seem to become sharper as time goes by ... and the bad seem less so. It's almost as though the memory has turned into a "feeling" rather than a specific event.
When I work on the fourth and the eighth Steps, my life flashes before me and, like one of those calendars from an old movie, time whizzes by and people who have been part of my life hurtle through space ... each triggering a memory.
Memories aren't made more poignant by time. One might think that a decade of recurring events might be remembered with more clarity than a year ... but I have found in the case of my own memories that it is the quality and intensity of time that produces the kind of memories Willa Cather talks about. A year or two or three, given the right circumstances, can produce the feelings we love our memories to trigger, more than those experienced during a lifetime. And a lifetime of memories can be dwindled into just moments.
One Day at a Time . . . I will cherish my memories ~ Because I may never experience the reality of some of them again. ~ Mari ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
THERE IS A SOLUTION. Almost none of us like the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. - Pg. 25 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is a fundamental unity that underlies the fellowship of our programs. It is this unity that can comfort us and help us hold on when we want a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort more than we want this new unfamiliar life.
God, as I understand You, show me how to take comfort from the unity of fellowship when drugs call me back.
Fear
Today, I allow myself to experience my fears as fears. I don't need to let them control and color the circumstances of my life. They are real, and it is understandable that I have them. Healing can mobilize my deep fears, they come up more intensely than normal. But this is a part of my process, and growth and healing aren't neat and tidy. When I am very afraid, I will comfort myself or seek comfort from someone else. I will understand that even though I fear the worst, the worst will not necessarily happen. My feelings feel very powerful inside me, but they are not facts. I can survive my fears and understand that they will pass.
I have compassion for the fearful part of me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Whatever you are trying to avoid, we won't go away until you confront it.
When I see myself as others see me, do I deny it?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Your Higher Power makes your life uncomfortable when it's time for you to change.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It is safe to know there is a special place within me where I can feel peace.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm unique, just like everybody else. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 26, 2017 1:10:11 GMT -5
February 27
Daily Reflections
A UNIQUE STABILITY
Where does A.A. get its direction? . . . These practical folk then read Tradition Two, and learn that the sole authority in A.A. is a loving God as He may express Himself in the group conscience. . . The elder statesman is the one who sees the wisdom of the group's decision, who holds no resentment over his reduced status, whose judgment, fortified by considerable experience, is sound, and who is willing to sit quietly on the sidelines patiently awaiting developments. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 132, 135
Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions. As my recovery progressed, I realized that the new mantle was tailor made for me. The elders of the group gently offered suggestions when change seemed impossible. Everyone's shared experiences became the substance for treasured friendships. I know that the Fellowship is ready and equipped to aid each suffering alcoholic at all crossroads in life. In a world beset by many problems, I find this assurance a unique stability. I cherish the gift of sobriety. I offer my gratitude for the strength I receive in a Fellowship that truly exists for the good of all members.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When we first came into A.A., the first thing we did was to admit that we couldn't do anything about our drinking. We admitted that alcohol had us licked and that we were helpless against it. We never could decide whether or not to take a drink. We always took the drink. And since we couldn't do anything about it ourselves, we put our whole drink problem into the hands of God. We turned the whole thing over to that Power greater than ourselves. And we have nothing more to do about it, except to trust God to take care of the problem for us. Have I done this honestly and fully?
Meditation For The Day
This is the time for my spirit to touch the spirit of God. I know that the feeling of the spirit-touch is more important than all the sensations of material things. I must seek a silence of spirit-touching with God. Just a moment's contact and all the fever of life leaves me. Then I am well, whole, calm and able to arise and minister to others. God's touch is a potent healer. I must feel that touch and sense God's presence.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that the fever of resentment, worry and fear may melt into nothingness. I pray that health, joy, peace and serenity may take its place.
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As Bill Sees It
Righteous Indignation, p. 58
"The positive value of righteous indignation is theoretical--especially for alcoholics. It leaves every one of us open to the rationalization that we may be as angry as we like provided we can claim to be righteous about it."
<< << << >> >> >>
When we harbored grudges and planned revenge for defeats, we were really beating ourselves with the club of anger we had intended to use on others. We learned that if we were seriously disturbed, our very first need was to quiet that disturbance, regardless of who or what we thought caused it.
1. Letter, 1954 2. 12 & 12, p. 47
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Walk In Dry Places
Selling myself____ Personal Relations Thoughtful people tell us that every person has to "sell" himself or herself in daily work. As alcoholics, we can find that threatening. Uncertainty and the fear of rejection or failure put us under stress. We can avoid this stress and tension by putting all responsibility for results in God's hands. While it is true that we want to succeed and to be accepted, we can never be sure that our idea of success is the right one. There are times when our strong determination to succeed at all costs makes us overbearing and demanding in our approach. We may be so anxious to appear competent and knowledgeable that we overreach our selves and make stupid blunders. God can show us how to handle each day's affairs in an orderly, reasonable way. It is not necessary to win every argument or to make every sale. We can sell ourselves mor effectively when we go through the day calmly and take a genuine interest in the ideas and concerns of others. I will look upon my customers and fellow workers as friends and allies. I don't have to bludgeon every person into accepting my point of view. If I am sincerely trying to follow God's will in all my affairs, others will sense my sincerity and will be glad to consider what I have to say.
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Keep It Simple
Without work all life goes rotten.---Albert Camus Work is more than earning money. Work means using our time and skills to make life better for those around us. Our work can be our hobbies. Growing food or growing flowers can be our work. Raising children or caring for older people who need help can be our work. Building homes or helping people live in them can be our work. Thanks to our program of recovery, we can do our best work again. What a change from the drugged-up and hung over days when we didn't do anything well. We are sober, and we have something to offer. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see that work makes me part of the human family. Help me do Your will in my work today. Action for the Day: Good work teaches us good habits. How do the things I've learned in my work help me in my recovery program? I'll list five ways.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Being alone and feeling vulnerable. Like two separate themes, these two parts of myself unite in my being and sow the seeds of my longing for unconditional love. --Mary Casey How easily we slip into self-doubt, fearing we're incapable or unlovable, perhaps both. How common for us to look into the faces of our friends and lovers in search of affirmation and love. Our alienation from ourselves, from one another, from God's Spirit which exists everywhere causes our discontent. It is our discontent. When souls touch, love is born, love of self and love of the other. Our aloneness exists when we create barriers that keep us separate from our friends, our family. Only we can reach over or around the barriers to offer love, to receive love. Recovery offers us the tools for loving, but we must dare to pick them up. Listening to others and sharing ourselves begins the process of loving. Risking to offer love before receiving it will free us from the continual search for love in the faces of others. I won't wait to be loved today. I will love someone else, fully. I won't doubt that I, too, am loved. I will feel it. I will find unconditional love.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
If he is enthusiastic your cooperation will mean a great deal. If he is lukewarm or thinks he is not an alcoholic, we suggest you leave him alone. Avoid urging him to follow our program. The seed has been planted in his mind. He knows that thousands of men, much like himself, have recovered. But don’t remind him of this after he has been drinking, for he may be angry. Sooner or later, you are likely to find him reading the book once more. Wait until repeated stumbling convinces him he must act, for the more you hurry him the longer his recovery may be delayed.
p. 113
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
Second, social conversation was a skill that I never acquired. When I met someone, I felt totally inadequate. To me, when I said "Hi, my name is ______," there followed a deafening silence, as if they were thinking, So? How did people have conversations anyway? How did they meet and then begin to talk as if they had known each other for years? For me it was one more thing that it wasn't all right not to know. So I kept drinking. When I drank, it didn't matter.
p. 514
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
But alas, this bright scene was not long in darkening. Confusion replaced serenity. It was found that some drunks yearned for education, but doubted if they were alcoholics. The personality defects of others could be cured maybe with a loan. Some were club-minded, but it was just a question of taking care of the lonely heart. Sometimes the swarming applicants would go for all three floors. Some would start at the top and come through to the bottom, becoming club members; others started in the club, pitched a binge, were hospitalized, then graduated to education on the third floor. It was a beehive of activity, all right, but unlike a beehive, it was confusion compounded. An A.A. group, as such, simply couldn't handle this sort of project. All too late that was discovered. Then came the inevitable explosion - something like that day the boiler burst in Wombley's Clapboard Factory. A chill chokedamp of fear and frustration fell over the group.
pp. 148-149
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The road to recovery is always under construction.
A cool head keeps you out of hot water.
Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting. --Elizabeth Bibesco
God, help me take a deep breath and holler woohoo. --Melody Beattie
A deeper bonding with one's spirit and with others at an essence level is the spiritual opportunity of the new millennium, yet the first step is an inside job -- starting with oneself. People have an innate desire to bond with others in the spirit of love, but an essential first step is rolling up our sleeves and applying some elbow grease toward managing attitudes and emotions that are not in line with our heart or authentic self. Then bonding becomes not an action you do but a way of being, the way of love. --Doc Childre
When the storms clouds threaten And on the sea of life we're tossed, When we don't know where we are going, Feeling all alone and lost....... There is a friend to turn to. A calming hand to guide your way He will make the dark clouds scatter and brighter grows the day. --Gloria Hall Wood
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FACTS
"To treat your facts with imagination is one thing, but to imagine your facts is another." -- John Burroughs
When I was drinking, I was always confusing fantasy with reality. Lies got mingled with the facts and the facts became exaggerated. It was almost impossible for me to distinguish between reality and fantasy, imagination and fact. My life was a complicated lie.
Today I have a program of "rigorous" honesty; I must be rigorous and stop the game before it starts. I need to practice the principles of recovery in every area of my life. The spiritual road involves a comprehensive journey and nothing need be left out.
God, who created the mountains, help me to take responsibility for the grit between my toes.
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"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song." Psalm 28:7
"He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD." Deuteronomy 8:3
"Come to me all of you who are tired and have heavy loads, and I will give you rest. Accept my teachings and learn from me, because I am gentle and humble in spirit, and you will find rest for your lives. The teaching I ask you to accept is easy; the load I give you to carry is light." Matthew 11:28-30
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Daily Inspiration
Time passes too quickly so waste none of it on anger, self-pity or the irritations of life. Lord, may my choices remove stress and free me to enjoy the goodness of today.
In your pursuit of happiness, pause to relax and be happy. Lord, slow me down just enough to enjoy all that You have given to me.
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NA Just For Today
"Pure Motives"
"We examine our actions, reactions, and motives. We often find that we've been doing better than we've been feeling." Basic Text, p. 42
Imagine a daily meditation book with this kind of message: "When you wake up in the morning, before you rise from your bed, take a moment for reflection. Lie back, gather your thoughts, and consider your plans for the day. One by one, review the motives behind those plans. If your motives are not entirely pure, roll over and go back to sleep." Nonsense, isn't it?
No matter how long we've been clean, almost all of us have mixed motives behind almost everything we do. However, that's no reason to put our lives on hold. We don't have to wait for our motives to become perfectly pure before we can start living our recovery.
As the program works its way into our lives, we begin acting less frequently on our more questionable motives. We regularly examine ourselves, and we talk with our sponsor about what we find. We pray for knowledge of our Higher Power's will for us, and we seek the power to act on the knowledge we're given. The result? We don't get perfect, but we do get better.
We've begun working a spiritual program. We won't ever become spiritual giants. But if we look at ourselves realistically, we'll probably realize that we've been doing better than we've been feeling.
Just for today: I will examine myself realistically. I will seek the power to act on my best motives, and not to act on my worst.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do. --Walter Babehot Everyone knew Jacob was a bitter old hermit who hated people. He lived by himself in a cabin in the woods. He never came to town, never talked to anyone, and never put up a mailbox or put in a phone. But he had one thing the townsfolk wanted--the very first Bible brought by a preacher when the town was first settled. They wanted it for their centennial celebration. Little Tom listened as the townsfolk complained daily about how much they wanted the old book to put on display. One day, he walked on out to the little cabin and just asked the old man if he could borrow the book, just for a week. Imagine the surprise on the faces of the people when the boy wandered back to town with the old dusty book in hand. Are we like the townspeople sometimes? Do we assume things won't work out without even trying? Sometimes help is there, just waiting to be asked. What have we got to lose? What can I request today that I have been afraid to ask for?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. Self-interest is but the survival of the animal in us. Humanity only begins for man with self-surrender. --Henri Amiel When we were lost in our addictive ways, we were driven by self-interest. We didn't necessarily like ourselves or want to be so self centered. But we had no inner resources to help us escape the trap of our egos. When we were there, we could not see outside ourselves well enough to ask for help. Surrender, we thought, brought only defeat and humiliation. The inspiration of this program brings us possibilities that cannot originate from within. When we surrender, we are no longer captives within our skins. We are actually restored to a more natural state as men in community with others, who literally cannot survive as isolated individuals. We must be a part of the give and take within the group, just as it has been for human beings since the beginning of time. Today, I surrender my self-interest again, knowing I must do it over and over.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. People Pleasers Have you ever been around people pleasers? They tend to be displeasing. Being around someone who is turned inside out to please another is often irritating and anxiety producing. People-pleasing is a behavior we may have adapted to survive in our family. We may not have been able to get the love and attention we deserved. We may not have been given permission to please ourselves, to trust ourselves, and to choose a course of action that demonstrated self-trust. People pleasing can be overt or covert. We may run around fussing over others, chattering a mile a minute when what we are really saying is, "I hope I'm pleasing you." Or, we may be more covert, quietly going through life making important decisions based on pleasing others. Taking other people's wants and needs into consideration is an important part of our relationships. We have responsibilities to friends and family and employers. We have a strong inner responsibility to be loving and caring. But, people pleasing backfires. Not only do others get annoyed with us, we often get annoyed when our efforts to please do not work as we planned. The most comfortable people to be around are those who are considerate of others but ultimately please themselves. Help me, God, work through my fears and begin to please myself.
Today I will trust myself when something does not feel smooth and flowing. I will begin to look around for alternatives for anything that feels rough and irritating. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Open to Life’s Magic
“I will never forget my mother’s words to me the first time she took me to the Hob rain forest,” a woman told me, when she learned I was going there. “We were at the edge of the forest, about to enter. My mother stopped walking and turned to me. “There’s magic here,” she said. It wasn’t her words that impressed me. What struck me was the absolute certainty and matter-of-fact way she said it. It was like she had just told me, ‘Dinner’s ready,’”
There’s magic in the air. It’s the next place on the journey. It’s inevitable. We have been clearing the path so we could do more than merely trudge down the road. The road leads to magic– a magical way of living. A magical way of being here. The magic in the air isn’t an illusion, isn’t a trick. You have done your work. You have stuck with the journey. Now is the time for fun,the time to see and know more of life’s magical ways.
Walk lightly. Enter the enchanted forest. Look around. Keep your eyes and ears open. Tell others what you see. The journey to the heart is a journey of wonder and awe.
“The ancient ones, the trees, are waiting for you,” the woman said. “When you get there, tell them I said hi.” Open to life’s magic. It’s been waiting for your call.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Live your life
A painting of a rice cake does not satisfy hunger. –Ancient saying
An old man was telling his grandson about how poor he was when he was younger. “Why when I was a kid, we couldn’t even afford cheese for the mousetraps,” he said. “We had to cut out pictures of cheese and use that.”
“Wow, did you catch anything gramps?”
“Yes. We caught pictures of mice.”
I have a picture in my house of a Buddhist ceremony in Tibet. The picture was taken by a photographer who lives close to the Blue Sky Lodge. She told me all about the picture when I bought it from her– told me about the smells in the air, the temperature, the crush of the people around her, the tastes, smells, and sights of that place. When I close my eyes and remember her words, I can almost go there. Almost, but not quite. I hope to travel there sometime, to see those things and to feel my soul filled with the spirituality of a monastery high on a hill. The picture is like a menu. It sits on the counter, tempting me with all that is offered in it. But it doesn’t satisfy my hunger.
We can share our experience, strength, and hope with each other. But I can’t learn your lessons and you can’t learn mine.
I’m planning my trip to Tibet, as I write this book. Will it all work out like the trip in the picture? I don’t know. I do know that I won’t get the experience– the sights, sounds, tastes, smells, and the impact on my soul– from looking at the picture on my wall.
Have you been trying to gain sustenance from looking at a picture of an experience– reading books, taking classes, going to seminars, listening to mentors– instead of going out and living life for yourself? Take another look at your menu, the list you wrote at the beginning of the year. Order something from it.
Stop looking at the picture and go live for yourself.
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Short Getaways Taking a Day Trip
by Madisyn Taylor
We need not go on an expensive vacation to feel we have had time off as your local park or beach can offer a blissful refuge.
We tend to think of a vacation as something that requires an enormous amount of preparation, but small daylong excursions can be just as refreshing and fulfilling as their lengthier counterparts. A short drive can be the channel that transports you into a world of novel experiences and blissful relaxation. Solo day trips can be a wonderful way to unwind from the stresses of routine existence while simultaneously feeding the soul. And when you choose to share your day trip with someone you care about, a leisurely drive becomes a chance to talk about childhood, recall favorite songs, or simply spend time enjoying one another's presence.
You may be surprised to see how many day-trip possibilities exist within a mere hour's time from your home. Forests, beaches, lakes, mountains, rivers, and deserts can serve as the perfect spot for a mini-vacation. The physical and mental rejuvenation you experience in an unfamiliar and engaging setting are enhanced by meditation, journaling, deep breathing, or just being still with nature. Though the cost of gasoline can make taking a day trip seem frivolous, and our commitment to environmental well-being may cause us to hesitate before utilizing our cars in this manner, there are numerous ways we can effectively offset our carbon signature while still seeing to the needs of ourselves on a soul level.
Since day trips tend to require much smaller investments of time and money than traditional outings, you can enjoy a diverse range of experiences day by day. On one weekend, you may be motivated by a need to connect with your natural heritage to explore a vast state park or nature preserve. On another, your curiosity can inspire you to visit a historical site that has long piqued your interest. In the end, where you go will often be less important than your willingness to broaden your horizons by removing yourself from the environment already so familiar to you. Each mini-getaway you take will imbue your existence with a sensation of renewal that prepares you for whatever lies ahead. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
If I live just one day at a time, I won’t so quickly entertain fears of what might happen tomorrow. As long as I’m concentrating on today’s activities, there won’t be room in my mind for worrying. I’ll try to fill every minute of this day with something. Then, when the day is ended, I’ll be able to look back on it with satisfaction, serenity and gratitude. Do I sometimes cherish bad feeling so that I can feel sorry for myself?
Today I Pray
That I will get out of the self-pity act and live for today. May I notice the good things from dawn to nightfall, learn to talk about them and thank God for them. May I catch myself if I seem to be relishing my moans and complaints more often than appreciating the goodness of my life.
Today I Will Remember
Today is good.
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One More Day
I shall not pass this way again; Then let me now relieve some pain, Remove some barrier from the road, Or brighten someone’s heavy load. – Eva Rose York
Sometimes we help other through – neighborhood clean-up committees, recycling stations, and paint-a-tons. Maybe we’ve volunteered through school or church or community organizations.
Illness has helped us better understand the relationship between those who help and those who need help. Loving help is not prompted by pity or superiority, but by empathy and shared humanness. Also, we’ve learned that no one is always the helper or always the one needing help. We are both. We are bonded to others through what we give — and what we receive.
I will show my love by helping and being willing to be helped.
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One Day At A Time
~ FIGHTING ~
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone ... The Big Book, page 84
When one goes through life at full speed ahead as I have done, it's hard to really step back and look at one's life. Everything is happening too fast and each day seems to blend into the next and, before you know it, the next segment of life seems to take over.
When I began my Twelve Step recovery program, I found myself slowing down ... examining my life ... observing those around me ... and reflecting on my past. I began to know who I was and I didn't like one of the things I discovered: I was a fighter. I didn't accept people, places or things unless and until they met my expectations of what they should be. I tried to control situations that I should have walked away from. I clung to people I should have distanced myself from. I tried to manipulate things that were toxic to me, and make them un-toxic ... and, in the process, did myself great harm.
When I first read those words from the AABB, "We have ceased fighting anything or anyone," I felt it didn't apply to me ... because at that point, I hadn't categorized myself as a fighter. It took living and working the Steps to realize that. And it took living and working the Steps to take the action necessary to stop being a fighter.
Life is calmer now. Relationships are smoother. I sometimes miss the excitement of going through like as though I were on a roller coaster ... but I won't go back there. Serenity means too much to me. Fighting is something I have put away forever.
One Day at a Time . . . I will direct my thinking and doing to those things in my life which will contribute to a meaningful and pleasant journey. ~ Mari ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
God has abundantly supplied this world with fine doctors, psychologists, and practitioners of various kinds. Do not hesitate to take your health problems to such persons. - Pg. 133 - The Family Afterwards
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Sometimes you won't be able to trust that all will be well. You'll think 'it isn't well' and 'I don't want to hear others telling me it will be all right.' OK. Be angry. Now go do something that is suggested to you today. Make a phone call to your sponsor, make a meeting, help another in early recovery. Channel your anger toward action.
Grant me the strength to do one activity today that is suggested in the books or by a fellow member in recovery.
Unseen Hands
There are forces in this ever alive and vibrating universe that want to help me if I can let them. I will pray to unseen hands to guide me toward wellness, to lift me towards God. If I am low, I will allow this legion of tiny hands to lift me in the blink of an eye. I will ask and trust that help is at hand. I will free my mind so that it can include more experience that it normally does. I will allow the veil to be lifted so that I can see this spiritual and alive universe for what it is and people for the tender and vulnerable creatures that we all are.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
It's a very interesting thing about human nature, when you stop treating yourself poorly, it will become unacceptable for others to do so.
If I don't take care of myself, why should anyone else?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Daily meditation for about 20 minutes is recommended for all in recovery; unless, of course, you're very busy, then you should meditate for an hour.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will trust myself when something does not feel smooth and flowing. I will begin to look around for alternatives for anything that feels rough and irritating.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
This is a disease of insight. I could see the filth, the deceit, the ugliness, the infidelity. The pain of alcoholism and me. It was all very clear. I could see through myself like glass - As Socrates said: 'The unexamined life is not worth living.' - Tom M.
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 27, 2017 22:42:51 GMT -5
February 28
Daily Reflections
WHAT? NO PRESIDENT?
When told that our Society has no president having authority to govern it, no treasurer who can compel the payment of any dues. . . . our friends gasp and exclaim, "This simply can't be . . ." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 132
When I finally made my way to A.A., I could not believe that there was no treasurer to "compel the payment of dues." I could not imagine an organization that didn't require monetary contributions in return for a service. It was my first and, thus far, only experience with getting "something for nothing." Because I did not feel used or conned by those in A.A., I was able to approach the program free from bias and with an open mind. They wanted nothing from me. What could I lose? I thank God for the wisdom of the early founders who knew so well the alcoholic's disdain for being manipulated.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We should be free from alcohol for good. It's out of our hands and in the hands of God, so we don't need to worry about it or even think about it any more. But if we haven't done this honestly and fully, the chances are that it will become our problem again. Since we don't trust God to take care of our problem for us, we reach out and take the problem back to ourselves. Then it's our problem again and we're in the same old mess we were in before. Do I trust God to take care of the problem for me?
Meditation For The Day
No work is of value without preparation. Every spiritual work must have behind it much spiritual preparation. Cut short times of prayer and times of spiritual preparation and many hours of work may be profitless. From the point of view of God, one poor tool working all the time, but doing bad work because of lack of preparation, is of small value compared with a sharp, keen, perfect instrument working only for a short time, but that turns out perfect work because of long hours of spiritual preparation.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may spend more time alone with God. I pray that I may get more strength and joy from such times, so that they will add much to my work.
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As Bill Sees It
Conviction and Compromise, p. 59
One qualification for a useful life is give-and-take, the ability to compromise cheerfully. Compromise comes hard to us "all or nothing" drunks. Nevertheless, we must never lose sight of the fact that progress is nearly always characterized by a series of improving compromises.
Of course, we cannot always compromise. There are circumstances in which it is necessary to stick flat-footed to one's convictions until the issue is resolved. Deciding when to compromise and when not to compromise always calls for the most careful discrimination.
Twelve Concepts, pp. 39-40
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Walk In Dry Places
Seeking Excitement____ Seeking Serenity "I haven't found anything to replace the excitement I felt while drinking," a member complained. "Sure, Im grateful to be sober. But sometimes it's so darned boring! Let' talk about that need for excitement, or "high." For many of us, it was an important part of our drinking. At times, our drinking was exciting---it came with celebrations, graduations, marriage receptions, engagements, and just about anything else out of the ordinary. Along with it, we wanted other excitement: exciting love affairs, exciting experiences, exciting stories. For us, however, excitement always ended with a crash, often a terrible one. Waking up after an exciting binge was a horrible moment. It stretched out to become horrible It never seemed to have a happy ending. We can take this addiction to excitement in hand by recognizing it as a component of our alcoholism. We'll still be able to be excited at times, but it must be a type of excitement that brings neither crash nor hangover. I will not let boredom push me into actions that I know will be destructive in the long run. I do not want thrills at the expense of my self-respect and sense of well-being.
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Keep It Simple
Leave yourself alone.---Jenny Janacek We often pick on ourselves. We put ourselves down. But doing this isn't part of our recovery. In fact, it goes against our program. Our program is based on loving care. We have turned our lives over to a caring, loving Higher Power who will give us the answers. We are told Easy Does It. We back off. As recovering addicts, we learn not to judge. Instead, we learn to be kind to ourselves. Our job is not to figure out the world, butt to add more love to it. Let's start with ourselves. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, stop me from judging. Help me know what You want to do. Help me work the Steps Two and Three. Action for the Day: Today, I'll leave myself alone. I will remember that picking on myself is another from of control.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The weariest night, the longest day, sooner or later must perforce come to an end. --Baroness Orczy The difficult spells in our lives come to an end. And no matter the depth of our disturbance, we will survive. We forget that the depths teach us how to better appreciate the heights. Sorrow heightens joy. Depression heightens laughter. We wouldn't know the joys and laughter were it not for the sorrows. In them we learn to be patient, waiting for the wisdom which will light our way. In them we learn to listen for the guidance that beckons us forth. We must reflect on the troubling experiences we've passed through of late. They made us wiser; they gave us strength. They changed us, moving us ever closer to the women, whole and happy, we desire to be. Difficulties often precede enlightenment. They pull us inward, perhaps push us to search for our connectedness to God, a connectedness that is at home in our hearts. The paradox is that these painful periods strengthen our oneness with the Spirit. If the day looks bleak, I will accept it as a hand reaching toward me, to pull me forward, to secure my place in the spiritual family.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
If you have a number three husband, you may be in luck. Being certain he wants to stop, you can go to him with this volume as joyfully as though you had struck oil. He may not share your enthusiasm, but he is practically sure to read the book and he may go for the program at once. If he does not, you will probably not have long to wait. Again, you should not crowd him. Let him decide for himself. Cheerfully see him through more sprees. Talk about his condition or this book only when he raises the issue. In some cases it may be better to let someone outside the family urge action without arousing hostility. If your husband is otherwise a normal individual, your chances are good at this stage.
p. 113
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
EMPTY ON THE INSIDE - She grew up around A.A. and had all the answers--except when it came to her own life.
It's important to interject here that I loved to drink. Drinking put me into the middle of life. I was a social drinker--drinking made me extremely social. I didn't particularly like drinking with other women; I drank with the big boys. I always had a tremendous capacity for alcohol, and I learned to shoot an excellent game of pool, which made me quite popular in the local tavern scene. At one point I even had my own motorcycle. When I read "Bill's Story" in the Big Book and he said, "I had arrived," I knew what he meant.
p. 514
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
When that lifted, a wonderful thing had happened. The head promoter wrote the Foundation office. He said he wished he'd paid some attention to A.A. experience. Then he did something else that was to become an A.A. classic. It all went on a little card about golf-score size. The cover read: "Middleton Group #1. Rule #62." Once the card was unfolded, a single pungent sentence leaped to the eye: "Don't take yourself too dam* seriously."
p. 149
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"The value of life lies not in the length of days, but in the use we make of them ..." --Michel de Montaigne
"The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes." --Frank Lloyd Wright
There is in each of us a God-shaped vacuum that only God can fill. --Blaise Pascal
Expectation is the greatest impediment to living. In anticipation of tomorrow, it loses today. --Seneca
And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. --Abraham Lincoln
Sometimes even to live is an act of courage. --Seneca
"This day I choose to spend in perfect peace." --A Course in Miracles
When we are fearful, God's love can help us to be confident. --Amanda Graham
O God, help us let your love conquer our fears.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PERFECTION
"He that is without sin amongst you, let him cast the first stone." -- Jesus Christ
It is so easy for me to focus on the failings of others and miss my own. My attraction to gossip is that it is usually about other people and that keeps the attention away from me. Sometimes I am made to "feel good" by exposing the weaknesses of others.
This attitude needs to be changed if I am ever to fully enjoy the fruits of sobriety. I do not need to be drinking to behave like a drunk; gossip and character assassination are reminiscent of my past addictive behavior. I do not need the side of me that seeks to destroy the character of others. With my spiritual program, I am trying to change.
May I grow in my forgiveness and acceptance of others.
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God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:3-4
Jesus said, "Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Luke 6:38
"If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles." Matthew 5:41
"Do to others as you would have them do to you." Luke 6:31
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Daily Inspiration
Set your priorities daily because some things in our path are just not important enough to use up our time and energy. Lord, with Your help I can have a full and enjoyable day.
God doesn't always end the storm, but He will calm your spirit and give you the courage you need. Lord, I have come to know and believe in the love You have for me.
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NA Just For Today
The Greatest Gift
"Our newly found faith serves as a firm foundation for courage in the future." Basic Text, p. 93 When we begin coming to meetings, we hear other addicts talking about the gifts they have received as a result of this program, things we never thought of as "gifts" before. One such "gift" is the renewed ability to feel the emotions we had deadened for so long with drugs. It's not difficult to think of love, joy, and happiness as gifts, even if it's been a long time since we've felt them. But what about "bad" feelings like anger, sadness, fear, and loneliness? Such emotions can't be seen as gifts, we tell ourselves. After all, how can we be thankful for things we want to run from?
We can become grateful for these emotions in our lives if we place them in their proper perspective. We need to remember that we've come to believe in a loving Higher Power, and we've asked that Power to care for us - and our Higher Power doesn't make mistakes. The feelings we're given, "good" or "bad;" are given to us for a reason. With this in mind, we come to realize that there are no "bad" feelings, only lessons to be learned. Our faith and our Higher Power's care give us the courage we need to face whatever feelings may come up on a daily basis.
As we heard early in recovery, "Your Higher Power won't give you more than you can handle in just one day." And the ability to feel our emotions is one of the greatest gifts of recovery.
Just for today: I will try to welcome my feelings, firm in the belief that I have the courage to face whatever emotions may come up in my life.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Nothing that is worth doing can be done alone, but has to be done with others. --Dr. Reinhold Niebuhr We who are blessed with a closely-knit family life, where thoughts and actions can be discussed and developed, are aware that what is given is not as important as what is shared. As we help one another, we learn that sharing can never exist unless we care first. This is the major ingredient of love. Albert Schweitzer described human service toward a common goal as the greatest of deeds. Charles Dickens assured us that when we lighten the burdens of another; we can never consider ourselves useless. Those of us who are led today may show the way tomorrow. In giving, we receive, and in getting we cannot avoid being givers. What do I receive by giving today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones. All of my life I been like a doubled up fist... poundin', smashin', drivin' - now I'm going to loosen these doubled up hands and touch things easy with them. --Tennessee Williams Every man has many sides. Some sides are highly developed and other sides aren't at all. We need not fear turning to a new side and exploring it. This recovery program has enabled us to pursue sides of ourselves that were closed before. When we were lost in our narrow world of codependency and addiction, we had fewer options. Now we have far greater access to our strength and our self-esteem, and we find new parts of ourselves. Many of us have found relationships, which were never possible before, job choices we would never have had, and the pleasure of greater involvement in life. It is reassuring to see that we don't always have to give up one side of ourselves to add new ones. Thanks to God for the many options opening up to me in this renewed life.
You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Letting Go of Denial We are slow to believe that which if believed would hurt our feelings. --Ovid Most of us in recovery have engaged in denial from time to time. Some of us relied on this tool. We may have denied events or feelings from our past. We may have denied other people's problems; we may have denied our own problems/ feelings, thoughts, wants, or needs. We denied the truth. Denial means we didn't let ourselves face reality, usually because facing that particular reality would hurt. It would be a loss of something: trust, love, family, perhaps a marriage, a friendship, or a dream. And it hurts to lose something or someone. ' Denial is a protective device, a shock absorber for the soul It prevents us from acknowledging reality until we feel prepared to cope with that particular reality People can shout and scream the truth at us, but we will not see or hear it until we are ready. We are sturdy yet fragile beings. Sometimes, we need time to get prepared, time to ready ourselves to cope. We do not let go of our need to deny by beating ourselves into acceptance; we let go of our need to deny by allowing ourselves to become safe and strong enough to cope with the truth We will do this, when the time is right. We do not need to punish ourselves for having denied reality; we need only love ourselves into safety and strength so that each day we are better equipped to face and deal with the truth. We will face and deal with reality - on our own time schedule, when we are ready, and in our Higher Power's timing. We do not have to accept chastisement from anyone, including ourselves, for this schedule. We will know what we need to know, when it's time to know it. Today, I will concentrate on making myself feel safe and confident. I will let myself have my awarenesses on my own time schedule.
I am at choice today. I accept the responsibility of my life with a new sense of maturity, confidence, and even excitement. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Let Life’s Rhythm Find You
I sat in my room, a small cabin in Chimayo, New mexico. The clock whizzed through the hours, but I didn’t whiz through my morning. I felt overwhelmed. Lost. I had more to do than I could handle. I didn’t know where to begin. So there I sat. Stuck.
Genera, who ran the hostel, knocked on my door about noon. “Are you okay?” she asked. “Come have coffee and fruit with us.” Her quiet kindness, her gentle concern, and the simple act of having coffee and fruit with a friend brought me back to balance.
There’s a life force, a movement, a momentum that transcends our fears and hopes, our limitations, our overwhelmed feelings, and even our confusion. There’s a heartbeat, a rhythm to life and the universe. It’s gentle, easy, natural. It’s in us; it’s around us. It comes gently, naturally, like a friend knocking quietly on the door, asking if we are okay, if we have lost our way.
There is purpose, meaning, and rhythm to each step, each beat of your life. Each step, each feeling, each beat of your life is another mile traveled on your journey, your journey to your heart.
If you’ve lost your way and can’t find life’s rhythm, don’t worry. Keep your heart open and it will find you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Experience life for yourself
We learn to do something by doing it. There is no other way. –John Holt
“I’m an armchair adventurer,” I’ve heard more than one person say. This means that they never actually go out and do anything. They let others take all the risk. Through books, they’ve climbed Mount Everest, sailed around the world, hiked the Pacific Crest Trail, and snowshoed to the South Pole. They were even able to tell me all about how to fly a plane before my first lesson.
It’s one thing to spend our time reading books or listening to lectures about how to do this or that– how to have a successful relationship, how to build a business, how to live life more fully, whatever comes after how to. The trick is to finally put the books down, walk away from the lecture, and do it. Getting information, support, and encouragement is helpful. Necessary,too. But life was meant to be lived, not studied. The only way that you’ll have a successful career, relationship, or hobby is to go out and get one for yourself.
God, help me take the risk of actually doing something I want to learn to do.
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Dealing with Difficult People Opening the Channels of Communication
by Madisyn Taylor
We all have the experience of difficult people in our lives at one point or another and honest but clear communication is the answer.
We encounter a wide variety of people throughout our lives. Many of them touch us in some positive way. Occasionally, however, we encounter those individuals who, for whatever reason, can be difficult to deal with. Perhaps this person is a colleague or close friend that you feel is deliberately being obtuse, inviting in trouble, or doing foolish things that you find annoying. Sometimes, it may be possible to appease or avoid those people short term. Dealing with them in the long term, however, can be exhausting. The behavior of difficult people can even make you feel like losing your temper, but keep your cool. Staying calm is the first step, especially when you are ready to confront them.
Avoiding a difficult person can improve impossible and not in your best interest, especially if you live or work together. Likewise, attempts to steer clear of them can become a source of stress and anxiety when they are a part of your social circle. When this is the case, it is best to kindly address the problem. Try not to let their actions or mood affect you. You also may want to try expressing your feelings directly. Tell to the person how their actions make you feel and encourage them toward a more positive course of action. Speak assertively, but respectfully, and don’t portray yourself as a victim. Another approach for dealing with a difficult individual is to gain a deeper understanding of who that person is. Ask them why they do or say certain things. If you disagree with their motives, question them further so you can try and discover the root of their behaviors. In doing so, you may be able to gently shift their perceptions, or at least help them understand your ! point of view.
You may want to think about what you want to say to a difficult person before you actually talk to them. If you can, avoid being judgmental or defensive, and try to approach the conversation objectively. If the person is open to the idea, try coming to an agreement. If approaching them fails, let it go and move on. There is no reason to let difficult person or situation have power over your state of being. Remember that a lot can be accomplished when you take the time to listen and offer up alternative perspectives. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We’re taught in The Program and the Twelve Steps that the chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear — mainly fear that we would lose something we already possessed or that we would fail to get something we demanded. Living on the basis of unsatisfied demands, we obviously were in a state of continuable disturbance and frustration. Therefore, we are taught, no peace will be ours unless we find a means of reducing these demands. Have I become entirely ready to have God remove all my defects of character?
Today I Pray
May I make no unrealistic demands on life, which, because of their grandiosity, can be met. May I place no excessive demands on others, which, when they are not fulfilled, leave me disappointed and let down.
Today I Will Remember
The set-up for a let-down.
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One More Day
We all like to forgive, and we all love best not those who offend us least, not those who have done the most for us, but those who make it most easy for us to forgive them. – Samuel Butler
None of us likes to harbor angry or bitter feelings toward another person. We know that friends may drift apart because of disagreements in which either of us will bend or compromise.
More and more, we know what our values are and the importance of how we reflect those values. When a friendship is threatened by anger or misunderstanding, we’re able to let our values guide us. We’ve been less willing o sacrifice our values to save a weak relationship. We’ve let go of some friends. If we’ve been stubborn or selfish, we’re better able now to preserve the friendship by making amends.
I will nurture my friendships and myself by letting my principles guide my life.
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One Day At A Time
~ RECOVERY ~
The people who get on in the world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want. George Bernard Shaw
There was a time, not so long ago, that my life was much different than it is right now. My weight was skyrocketing because my eating compulsion was out of control. I couldn't walk very far without huffing and puffing. My lower back hurt because my stomach pulled my spine out of alignment. My feet and ankles were swollen, my knees hurt, just standing was painful. I was hot all the time because my fat acted as insulation, keeping my body temperature high. My wife was hounding me about losing the weight, my doctor was taking her side, and even the kids at my son's daycare were asking me why I was so big.
I didn't start the recovery process (and it IS a process!) until I got to the point where I was so uncomfortable with myself that I had to do something. It wasn't just that I was physically uncomfortable. I had to get past the comfort zone I had mentally and emotionally set up for myself; I had to get uncomfortable. I had to jump into the unknown, which was the most frightening thing I'd ever done.
Sitting around, moaning about my circumstances and suffering the physical consequences of my weight, didn't get me anywhere. It was only when I became ready to see my life change, mentally, emotionally AND physically, that I began the footwork of this Program. That was the key to the beginning of my recovery, the getting up and actually doing something about it. When I took that first Step, the miracle began.
One Day at a Time . . . I will take the necessary steps to maintain my recovery from compulsive eating. ~ JAR ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Though they knew they must help other alcoholics if they would remain sober, that motive became secondary. It was transcended by the happiness they found in giving themselves for others. - Pg. 159 - A Vision For You
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We must always fan the flame of inspiration and enthusiasm or our slight hold on sobriety will flicker and fade. We fan the flame by going to meetings, listening to the professionals we hire, choose and use a sponsor, and we must help others.
God, as I understand You, please show me one person I can give an encouraging word to in this hour.
New Life
I can feel my body and my spirit trying to come back to health. I am breathing in and out with relaxed, complete breaths and with each breath I take, I feel more serene. I sense the life within each pore of my body and it feels good, it feels right, it feels alive. My body needed to fall apart a little, it needed to get my attention and tell me it needed tender, loving care. Today, I will pay attention to what my body is trying to tell me it wants and needs and I will give it what it is calling out for.
I listen to what my body is asking for and I do something about it
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Do you think you deserve special treatment because you are clean and sober? Most of us do at one time or another. Treat us special and we feel normal; treat us normal and we feel rejected.
Do I want my ego to be the first thing people see when I walk into a room?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
People may not always believe what you say, but they will always believe what you do.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am at choice today. I accept the responsibility of my life with a new sense of maturity, confidence, and even excitement.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
...And the unlived life is not worth examining. - Serenity Sam.
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