impatience?

[Lin]

I am thinking I need to work on impatience...and perhaps obsession.

I am trying to move things out of myy kitchen to get ready for new cabinets and such. I have a piece of antique furniture that was between the kitchen and the living room. It is a secretary. It belonged to my grandparents. It's my only piece of antique furniture. It has sentimental value. I wanted it moved today. It does not need to be moved for about a week, but I know how hectic my week will be. I cleaned it out and had stuff stacked ecverywhere. I asked hubby several times to help me move it. He said it does not need to be moved now. He did not care about the stacks of stuff everywhere.

When he left for AA tonight I decided I'd jsut move it myself. It has wheels. It only had to be moved about 3 yards. How hard can that be?

It fell over. The glass door broke. The beveled mirror broke. The carved part that holds the mirror broke. The top on the other side came un nailed. One of the doors lost screws from the hinge.

I cleaned up the mess as best I could. I sort of put the pieces back where they used to belong. I'm not sure if it can even be fixed.

I am dreading him coiming home and yelling at me for not waiting.
I have no idea what I'll say.

obsessing about the confrontation.

Mad that it's busted and it was important to me.

Wondering if the impatience got me in trouble.

Trying to turn it over to God, but wanting to cry at the same time.

My bare feet feel like they have tiny pieces of glass in them. That could be true.

LIN

[SaraLee]

Lin, I empathize with you about not having patience and also obsessing over things. They go hand and hand. I'm dealing with those two right now myself. We are making a room in our basement and the electrician is putting us off. He needs to do his work before the contractor can finish his work and I'm getting very impatient waiting for the electrician to get here and do his job. It kept me awake last night thinking about it and there isn't anything I can do at this time to make things go faster.

I'd like to believe that when we turn things over to God we are always at peace with what is going on and maybe that is how it should be but way to often we hang onto our feelings anyway.

Hope you got your secretary back together.

SaraLee

SaraLee

[carolsongs]

I sympathize with you too linn,i dont think yuou were impatient, IIt takes planning and hard work to create abeautiful harmoniess home.and i know that if I want a heavy piece of fiurniture moved and husbands too busy to do,I get that child hood doom and gloom black cloud feeling, i need help to create the harmony in our home,we just bought this home a few months ago and i had this nagging feeling to take the hutch part of the china cabinet away and store it to give a more open and roomy feeling it took weeks for the husband to take the hutch away. I felt not heard, did he realize how important it was to me?I felt a sense of freedom when he finally moved the hutch. Im sorry for that antique breaking, i would go out and find the most beautiful piece of furniture to remind me of my healing as a replacement, to creat a new memorie, redoing you Kitchen should be a great joy with a little heckteckness, like the sillyness of you moving that furniture on your own, carolsongs

[Lin]

I didn';t tell him last night and he never noticed it until this after. He asked..WHEN did you move the secretary? I said..LAST NIGHt. ANd then I said..and I sort of dropped it and it broke. HE yeled abit..tellig me I get in too big of a hurry . Later when he heard me taking some papers out to the trash toter he asked if I was in the kitchen breaking something else. I said..NOPE...jsut throwing away some paper. This after noon I went in with screw drivers to remove all of the little racks, etc and knick-knacks on the walls. WHen I had two more to go I aske dhim if he'd like to help me. HE put me off again so I went in and made a pitcher of tea. While I was doing that he came in and saw how much I had done and he took down those last two racks. They had been up there many. many years and the screws were very tight.

Thanks to both of you for the replies. I have heard from freinds that there are three people in this area that they know who repair and refurbish antiques. I will wait until the kitchen is finished and then ask one of them to look at it and tell me if it can be salvages. For now it's sitting htere..no mirror...most of the glass door missing and pieces of the carved wood jsut sitting in the place they woudl be if they were connected. Unless you were looking for it, you might not notice so much.

LIN

[majestyjo]

A good thought Lin, I see that I didn't respond at the time of your post. It was probably when my computer was down or they kicked me off the site for posting too much.

I remember being a bit impatient, because they were jeopardizing my sobriety. The site has been my lifeline, especially when I can't get out to a meeting.

Weather plays a big part in my recovery, if it is raining or snowing, it generally means I don't get out. It is also when I have extra pain, whenever the barometer changes, up or down, I end up hurting. That is how it is with arthritis and I just had to accept it.

I would come to the site and read a post and would share on what I read and how it helped me. I would get impatient with myself, because I put very high expectations on myself and would have trouble meeting them. I had to lower them, so my goals were attainable or put off to another day. If I could find acceptance, I would have patience.