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Post by majestyjo on Sept 12, 2018 10:00:18 GMT -5
September 12
Daily Reflections
I AM RESPONSIBLE
For the readiness to take the full consequences of our past acts, and to
take responsibility for the well-being of others at the same time, is the
very spirit of Step Nine.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 87
In recovery, and through the help of Alcoholics Anonymous, I learn
that the very thing I fear is my freedom. It comes from my tendency
to recoil from taking responsibility for anything: I deny, I ignore, I
blame, I avoid. Then one day, I look, I admit, I accept. The freedom,
the healing and the recovery I experience is in the looking, admitting and
accepting. I learn to say, "Yes, I am responsible." When I can speak
those words with honesty and sincerity, then I am free.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
"What draws newcomers to A.A. and gives them hope? They hear the
stories of men and women whose experiences tally with their own. The
expressions on the faces of the women, that undefinable something in
the eyes of the men, the stimulating atmosphere of the A.A.
clubroom, conspire to let them know that there is haven at last. The
very practical approach to their problems, the absence of intolerance
of any kind, the informality, the genuine democracy, the uncanny
understanding that these people in A.A. have is irresistible." Have I
found a real haven in A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
"If thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light." The eye
of the soul is the will. if your will is to do the will of God, to serve Him
with your life, to serve Him by helping others, then truly shall your
whole body be full of light. The important thing is to strive to attune
your will to the will of God, a single eye to God's purpose, desiring
nothing less than that His purposes be fulfilled. Try to seek in all
things the advance of His kingdom, seek the spiritual values of honesty
and purity, unselfishness and love, and earnestly desire spiritual
growth. Then your life will emerge from the darkness of futility into
the light of victory.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that my eye may be single. I pray that my life may be lived in
the light of the best that I know.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Satisfactions of Right Living, p.254
How wonderful is the feeling that we do not have to be specially
distinguished among our fellows in order to be useful and
profoundly happy. Not many of us can be leaders of prominence,
nor do we wish to be.
Service gladly rendered, obligations squarely met, troubles well
accepted or solved with God's help, the knowledge that at home or
in the world outside we are partners in a common effort, the fact
that in God's sight all human beings are important, the proof that
love freely given brings a full return, the certainty that we are no
longer isolated and alone in self-constructed prisons, the surety that
we can fit and belong in God's scheme of things--these are the
satisfactions of right living for which no pomp and circumstance, no
heap of material possessions, could possibly be substitutes.
12 & 12, p.124
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Handle the Old tapes with care.
Releasing the Past.
A large number of recovering people have a tough time coming to terms
with the abuse and abandonment of childhood days. Sometimes we play
those "old tapes" while reliving the past in a mood of self-pity and resentment.
This is destructive.
We cannot completely erase the past, but we can turn it over to our friends and
our Higher power. Our goal should be to transform past experiences into constructive examples.
We can start by reminding ourselves that all unhappy experience is a product
of the world's sickness and ignorance. Far from being unusual, our misery
was a common thing that we're only now beginning to overcome.
We can also practice God's forgiveness, remembering that real forgiveness
is humanly impossible. We should resist the temptation to tell others about
our past sufferings in order to gain sympathy. At all times, the old tapes must
be handled with care.
Whatever happened in the past cannot affect me today unless I let it.
I'll play the old tapes only when it can be done constructively.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
When angry, count to ten before you speak: if very angry, a hundred.
---Thomas Jefferson
Sometimes we just want to yell. Maybe a family member or a friend messed
up, and we want to “set them straight.” Start counting. Maybe we got chewed
out at work and we want “to get even.”
Start counting.
We get drunk on anger. We may feel powerful when we “set someone straight.”
But like an alcohol high, an anger high last only a short time and can hurt others.
We must control our anger. This is why we count.
Cool down. Think out what you need or want to say. Use words that you’ll not be
ashamed of later. Learning how to respect others when we’re angry is a sign of recovery.
Prayer for the Day : Higher Power, teach me to respect others when I’m angry.
Action for the Day: Today, when I feel angry I’ll count. I’ll work at not controlling other with my anger.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
No person is your enemy, no person is your friend, and every person is
your teacher. --Florence Scovel Shinn
We can open ourselves to opportunities today. They abound in our lives.
No circumstance we find ourselves in is detrimental to our progress. No
relationship with someone at work or at home is superfluous to our development.
Teachers are everywhere. And as we become ready for a new lesson, one will appear.
We can marvel at the wonder of our lives today. We can reflect on our yesterdays
and be grateful for the lessons they taught. We can look with hopeful anticipation
at the days ahead--gifts, all of them. We are on a special journey, serving a special
purpose, uniquely our own. No barrier, no difficult person, no tumultuous time is
designed to interrupt our progress. All experiences are simply to teach us
what we have yet to learn.
Trusting in the goodness of all people, all situations, all paths to progress will
release whatever our fears, freeing us to go forth with a quicker step and an
assurance that eases all moments.
The Twelve Steps help us to recognize the teachers in our lives. They help us
clear away the baggage of the past and free us to accept and trust the will of God,
made known to us by the teachers as they appear.
I am a student of life. I can learn only if I open my mind to my teachers.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
The head of the house ought to remember that he is mainly to blame for what befell his home. He can scarcely square the account in his lifetime. But he must see the danger of over-concentration on financial success. Although financial recovery is on the way for many of us, we found we could not place money first. For us, material well-being always followed spiritual progress; it never preceded.
p. 127
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Sobriety is nothing like I thought it would be. At first it was one big emotional roller coaster, full of sharp highs and lows. My emotions were new, untested, and I wasn't entirely certain I wanted to deal with them. I cried when I should have been laughing. I laughed when I should have cried. Events I thought were the end of the world turned out to be gifts. It was all very confusing. Slowly things began to even out. As I began to take the steps of recovery, my role in the pitiful condition of my life became clear.
pp. 316-317
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
But of the things which really bother and burn us, we say nothing. Certain distressing or humiliating memories, we tell ourselves, ought not be shared with anyone. These will remain our secret. Not a soul must ever know. We hope they'll go to the grave with us.
pp. 55-56
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"Pray to God, but keep rowing to the shore."
--Russian Proverb
The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.
--Flora Whittemore
One never knows what each day is going to bring. The important thing
is to be open and ready for it.
--Henry Moore
"Lord, make me a channel of thy peace--that where there is hatred, I
may bring love--that where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of
forgiveness--that where there is discord, I may bring harmony--that
where there is error, I may bring truth--that where there is doubt, I
may bring faith--that where there is despair, I may bring hope--that
where there are shadows, I may bring light--that where there is
sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to
comfort than to be comforted--to understand, than to be
understood--to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that
one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one
awakens to Eternal Life. Amen."
--12 & 12, p. 99
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SELF-LOVE
"To love oneself is the
beginning of a life-long
romance."
-- Oscar Wilde
Today I am able to say that I love myself. To love myself is to love
God and the world in which I live. I cannot befriend, hug, help or
create without first having a relationship with myself. Without me,
there is no meaning to my life. I am the most important thing in my
life. This is not said to be conceited but is an aspect of self-love. It
reveals a healthy pride and respect for my life. And it feels good.
For years I thought that to love "self" was wrong and sinful, a
misuse of energy and time. What people thought about me was so
important; what people said about me was a constant worry. And the
more I looked out of myself for meaning, the more lost, isolated
and confused I became. Then I heard that God loved me and he
wanted me to love me. Today I live and love through me.
O God who created me to love, let me begin with me.
************************************************** *********
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie
down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores
my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will
fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort
me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love
will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of
the LORD forever.
Psalm 23
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Daily Inspiration
No one has the power to take your happiness or keep you from being happy and at peace unless you allow it.
Lord, help me remember that I am sustained and supported by Your love for me who wants only for my safety
and goodness.
Enthusiasm keeps the mind young and the spirit growing.
Lord, may I always see wonder in the ordinary happenings of my day.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
New Horizons
"My life is well-rounded and I am becoming a more comfortable version of myself, not the neurotic, boring person that I thought I'd be without drugs."
Basic Text p.262
Is there really life without drugs? Newcomers are sure that they are destined to lead a humdrum existence once they quit using. That fear is far from reality.
Narcotics Anonymous opens the door to a new way of life for our members. The only thing we lose in NA is our slavery to drugs. We gain a host of new friends, time to pursue hobbies, the ability to be stabley employed, even the capacity to pursue an education if we so desire. We are able to start projects and see them through to completion. We can go to a dance and feel comfortable, even if we have two left feet. We start to budget money to travel, even if it's only with a tent to a nearby campsite. In recovery, we find out what interests us and pursue new pastimes. We dare to dream.
Life is certainly different when we have the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous to return to. Through the love we find in NA, we begin to believe in ourselves. Equipped with this belief, we venture forth into the world to discover new horizons. Many times, the world is a better place because an NA member has been there.
Just for today: I can live a well-rounded, comfortable life-a life I never dreamt existed. Recovery has opened new horizons to me and equipped me to explore them.
pg. 266
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
No yesterdays are ever wasted for those who give themselves today. --Brendan Francis
We often find ourselves yearning for tomorrow. We get carried away thinking about the next day's big game or camping trip. We find ourselves daydreaming about how much fun we'll have with friends or what animals we'll see in the park.
The next day comes and perhaps the excitement about the game diminishes because our friends can't make it or the camping trip is canceled because of bad weather. We feel cheated and begin regretting the missed opportunities of yesterday.
When we find ourselves concentrating only on tomorrow, we need to stop and look around. We'll begin to notice the joke a friend is telling, or the bird flying overhead. We will begin appreciating the joys of the moment.
When we live in the moment, we have no expectations about the next moment, and without expectations, we can't be disappointed, only surprised.
What is delightful about this moment right now?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Not all fights are bad; in fact they are preferable to disciplined serenity. --William Atwood.
A good relationship includes some disagreement. Anger and disagreement, when we express them respectfully, are important ways of renewing communication and breaking through the walls that sometimes built up. No relationship can tolerate constant fighting. But, when we don't agree with someone, we owe it to that person to speak up and follow through to resolution. We can promise ourselves and the other person that we will stay in the relationship through the disagreement. It is because we care that we fight.
In any relationship we care about, there will be differences. When we avoid all confrontations, our relationships go stale because all emotional issues are avoided. Carefulness and over control undermine love because they don't give it room to breathe, but disagreement and anger expressed in honest and respectful ways will help love grow.
Today, I pray for the courage to acknowledge my disagreements and angry feelings with others and to deal with their feelings toward me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
No person is your enemy, no person is your friend, and every person is your teacher. --Florence Scovel Shinn
We can open ourselves to opportunities today. They abound in our lives. No circumstance we find ourselves in is detrimental to our progress. No relationship with someone at work or at home is superfluous to our development. Teachers are everywhere. And as we become ready for a new lesson, one will appear.
We can marvel at the wonder of our lives today. We can reflect on our yesterdays and be grateful for the lessons they taught. We can look with hopeful anticipation at the days ahead--gifts, all of them. We are on a special journey, serving a special purpose, uniquely our own. No barrier, no difficult person, no tumultuous time is designed to interrupt our progress. All experiences are simply to teach us what we have yet to learn.
Trusting in the goodness of all people, all situations, all paths to progress will release whatever our fears, freeing us to go forth with a quicker step and an assurance that eases all moments.
The Twelve Steps help us to recognize the teachers in our lives. They help us clear away the baggage of the past and free us to accept and trust the will of God, made known to us by the teachers as they appear.
I am a student of life. I can learn only if I open my mind to my teachers.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Healing
We should learn not to grow impatient with the slow healing process of time. We should discipline ourselves to recognize that there are many steps to be taken along the highway leading from sorrow to renewed serenity... We should anticipate these stages in our emotional convalescence: unbearable pain, poignant grief, empty days, resistance to consolation, disinterestedness in life, gradually giving way . . . to the new weaving of a pattern of action and the acceptance of the irresistible challenge of life.
--Joshua Loth Liebman
Recovery is a process. It is a gradual process, a healing process, and a spiritual process - a journey rather than a destination.
Just as codependency takes on a life of its own and is progressive, so recovery progresses. One thing leads to another and things - as well as us - get better.
We can relax, do our part, and let the rest happen.
Today, I will trust this process and this journey that I have undertaken.
Each step I take today makes me feel better and better. Today I know that I have all that I need to do exactly what must be done and go exactly where I need to go. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Energize Yourself
Don’t tell yourself you have no energy. You are energy. Learn to energize yourself.
Get up. Move around. Play some invigorating music. Stretch your arms, stretch your legs. Move your body around. Get out and walk.
Watch children play. They seem to have an unlimited supply of energy. Remember what it was like to be a child. You had an unlimited supply of energy then. Most of us still do.
Yes, we do get tired from time to time, particularly with the schedules many of us have. And there are time in our life when less energy is available to us, such as during times of deep grief or during illness when our body is using its energy to heal a physical problem. And sometimes other people and their problems drain us. But sometimes we drain ourselves,too.
If you don’t feel your energy, perhaps something is blocking it. You may be experiecing some resistance to what you’re trying to do. Maybe an old emotion or belief is clogging your circuits. Maybe you’ve been sitting too long crunched up in your chair, blocking your own circuits. Maybe you’re telling yourself you have no energy so loudly that you’ve begun to believe it.
Clear your circuits. Push through whatever’s blocking you. Then get up, move around, connect to life. Learn to energize yourself.
*****
more language of letting go
Look at the roles you play
In his book Ethics for a New Millenium, the Dalai Lama spoke of the idea that most of us aren't a static personality. There isn't just one side to us; we play many roles in life.
I am a recovering alcoholic and a recovering codependent. I am a mother. I am a writer. I am someone's girlfriend. I am a sky diver. I am a business person, a negotiator, a woman. In each of these roles, my personality expresses itself differently. I use different talents and traits.
What are all the different roles you play in your life? Most of us are aware that we're one person at work, somewhat different at home, and sometimes a lot different when we play. Some of us tend to feel guilty about this. "Oh, if they only knew what I was like at home, they'd never respect me as a boss," one man said.
Take the time to get to know all the different parts of yourself. Honor and respect each one. Each has an important role to play in your life. When we're trying to move forward, take a moment. Make certain that all of your I am's are working together for your best.
You don't have to behave the same at home as you do at work. You get to be a mother, and a wife,too. Honor and respect all the different roles you play in life, understanding that each one has its own important place.
Then remember to practice the principles we're striving to live by in everything we do.
Our roles might change, but the ideals and values we live by don't.
God, help me honor and accept all my past and present I am's. Help me leave enough room to create new sides or parts of myself,too.
Activity: Take some time to write in your journal about all the different roles you play in your life right now. Describe each role as accurately as you can. The next time you get stuck, consult each one of these personalities. For instance, the worker in you may want to make a particular decision about moving forward in your career, but the parent self may have some objections. Understand every part of your personality and learn to make decisions that benefit the whole.
*****
Walking With Awareness
Mindful Walking
Many of us take the benefits of walking for granted. Each day we limit the steps we take by driving or sitting for long periods of time. But walking even a few blocks a day has unlimited benefits – not only for our health, but our spirit as well, for as we walk, we connect with the earth.
Even when walking on concrete, the earth is still beneath us, supporting us. Walking lets our body remember simpler times, when life was less complicated. This helps us slow down to the speed of our body and take the time to integrate the natural flow of life into our cellular tissue. Instead of running from place to place or thinking about how much more we can fit into our day, walking allows us to exist in the moment.
Each step we take can lead us to becoming more mindful of ourselves and our feelings. Walking slows us down enough not only to pay attention to where we are in our body, but also to our breath. Taking time to simply notice our breath while we walk, through the length of our inhales and exhales, and becoming attuned to the way in which we breathe is taking a step towards mindfulness. When we become more mindful, we gradually increase our awareness of the environment around us and start to recognize that the normal flow of our thoughts and feelings are not always related to where we are in the present moment. Gradually we realize that the connection we have with the earth and the ground beneath our feet is all that is. By walking and practicing breathing mindfully we gain a sense of calm and tranquility -- the problems and troubles of the day slowly fade away because we are in the ‘now’.
The simplicity and ease of a walking practice allows us to create time, space and awareness of our surroundings and of the wonders that lie within. Taking a few moments to walk each day and become more aware of our breath will in turn open the door for the beauty of the world around us to filter in. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“At certain moments.” wrote Coleridge, ” a single almost insignificant sorrow may, by association, bring together all the little epics of pain and discomfort, bodily and mental, that we have endured even from infancy.” The Program doesn’t teach us to pretend that hardships and sorrow are meaningless. Grief really hurts, and so do other kinds of pain. But now that we’re free of our addictions, we have much greater control over our thinking. And the thoughts we choose to spend time on during any given day can strongly influence the complexion of our feelings for that day. Am I finding different and better ways of using my mind?
Today I Pray
May I thank God for the pain — however insignificant -0- that magnetizes my succession of old hurts into one large one that I can take out and look at, and then discard to make room for new and present concerns. May I thank God for restoring my sensitivity to pain after the numbness of addiction.
Today I Will Remember
I can thank God for restoring my feelings.
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One More Day
There is no more certain sign of a narrow mind, or stupidity, and of arrogance, then to stand aloof from those who think differently from us.
– Walter Savage Landor
We all carry some opinions and beliefs formed long ago, with no thought as to how they continue to affect us. We may be inflexible to beliefs or ideas that differ from ours. Because of this we might be intolerant of other people, especially those who seem different from us.
Our beliefs and actions toward other people may come from fear — a fear of the unexpected, of the unknown, or of being wrong. Wee may resist examining the rules and beliefs governing our lives because we’re not totally sure of them. Opening ourselves to new ideas is easier if we remain ourselves that we don’t have to accept the ideas, just the people.
I can fearlessly open myself to new ideas and new people.
************************************************** ******************
Food For Thought
Carrying the Message
We do not keep our program unless we give it away. Our participation in meetings is a means of sharing with others what OA has given us. We are genuinely interested in newcomers, because they remind us of where we came from and because they give us an opportunity to strengthen our own program by sharing what we have received.
Sometimes we carry the message by providing transportation for someone who otherwise would not get to a meeting. Sometimes we give of ourselves by simply listening when a newcomer needs to talk. Practicing the OA principles in all areas of our life is carrying the message, even to those who are not compulsive overeaters.
Abstinence and the OA program now occupy the central place in our lives, the place which was once held by food. Following the will of our Higher Power means that we carry the message as He directs us. We are willing to be used in whatever way God moves us to give away our program.
May I serve You by carrying the message.
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One Day At A Time
LOVE
“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line.
You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”
Lucille Ball
It took me a long time to learn what love truly means. I thought love included pleasing others, saying “yes” when I meant “no,” swallowing my true feelings and putting myself last. What I didn’t know is that I was practicing resentment, anger, fear, jealousy and everything but love. I could not love others because I did not love myself.
Then I decided to take care of myself first. I considered no one but me, took care of myself, (or so I thought) while actually alienating myself from those close to me. I ate compulsively to tame the self-loathing I felt inside. And I loathed myself because I did not treat myself with real love and kindness.
Today I know that loving myself must come first. If I love myself, I am better able to love everyone in my life because I do things from a place of honesty. If I treat myself with respect, I treat others with respect. Everyone wins when I love myself enough to accept myself, flaws and all.
One day at a time ...
I will ask my Higher Power for the
ability to accept and love myself for where I
am this day, knowing I am a work in progress like a
tree that grows from self-care and nurturing.
~ Melissa
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The terms 'spiritual experience' and 'spiritual awakening' are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Complete involvement in this new way of life will keep you from falling through the cracks. If you stay in the middle of us, you won't fall off the edge.
As I follow those before me, newcomers will follow behind me and I will always be in the middle of the path of progress.
The Experience of Pleasure
I will build my capacity for experiencing joy and serenity. What good is earning a living if I don't enjoy my life, what good is recovery if I don't become grateful for the life I am saving, namely mine. Today I recognize that it is the simple pleasures that bring me the greatest joy. Waking up and feeling good. Enjoying the weather, a friend, a cup of tea. When I allow myself to live my life rather than chase after what I think my life should be or reject the good that is around me a mysterious thing happens. Life is enough. The space around me just sort of fills up with something, an energy, a sensation of being alive, a presence that fills in what previously felt empty. I look around and know it is enough.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Friends and loved ones don't always behave as we expect them to. But this is a good thing. If friends and loved ones were absolutely predictable, that would mean they are not changing and if they are not changing, they are not growing.
I don't have to change friends if I understand that friends change.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Keep the focus on yourself, but once the picture is taken, move on.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Each step I take today makes me feel better and better.
Today I know that I have all that I need to do exactly what must be done and go exactly where I need to go.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If a newcomer calls at 2 am, I say: 'Your answer's on page 63 of the Big Book.' - I don't know what's on page 63, but this guy will start reading and if his answer's not there, he'll think; 'Well he must have given me the wrong page.' and keep reading until he finds his answer. - Serenity Sam.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 13, 2018 10:00:02 GMT -5
September 13
Daily Reflections
REPAIRING THE DAMAGE
Good judgment, careful sense of timing, courage and prudence -
these are the qualities we shall need when we take Step Nine.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 83
To make amends can be viewed two ways: first, that of repairing
damage, for if I have damaged my neighbor's fence, I "make a mend,"
and that is a direct amend; the second way is by modifying my
behavior, for if my actions have harmed someone. I make a daily
effort to cause no further harm. I "mend my ways," and that is
an indirect amend. Which is the best approach? The only right
approach, provided that I am causing no further harm in so doing,
is to do both. If harm is done, then I simply "mend my ways."
To take action in this manner assures me of making honest amends.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
"No one is too discredited, nor has sunk too low, to be welcomed
cordially into A.A., if he or she means business. Social
distinctions, petty rivalries and jealousies are laughed out of
countenance. Being wrecked in the same vessel, being restored
and united under one God, with hearts and minds attuned to the
welfare of others, the things which matter so much to some people
no longer signify much to us. In A.A., we have true democracy and
true brotherhood."
Meditation For The Day
When you call on God in prayer to help you overcome weakness,
sorrow, pain, discord, and conflict, God never fails in some way
to answer the appeal. When you are in need of strength for yourself
or for the help of some other person, call on God in prayer. The
power you need will come simply, naturally, and forcefully. Pray
to God not only when you need help, but also just to commune
with Him. The spirit of prayer can alter an atmosphere from one
of discord to one of reconciliation. It will raise the quality of
thought and word and bring order out of chaos.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may bring peace where these is discord.
I pray that I may bring conciliation where these is conflict.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Wider Understanding, p.255
To reach more alcoholics, understanding of A.A. and public good will
towards A.A. must go on growing everywhere. We need to be on
still better terms with medicine, courts, prisons, mental hospitals, and
all enterprises in the alcoholism field. We need the increasing
good will of editors, writers, television and radio channels. These
publicity outlets need to be opened ever wider.
********************************
Nothing matters more to A.A.'s future welfare than the manner in
which we use the colossus of modern communication. Used unselfishly
and well, it can produce results surpassing our present
imagination. Should we handle this great instrument badly, we
shall be shattered by the ego manifestations of our own people.
Against this peril, A.A. members' anonymity before the general
public is our shield and our buckler.
1. Twelve Concepts, p.51
2. Grapevine, November 1960
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Learning to Cut my Losses
Honesty
Business people speak of “cutting their losses” when it becomes clear that
a venture is going sour. As recovering alcoholics, we need to practice the
same principle when we’re obviously on the wrong track.
If a resentment is developing, for example, the sooner we spot it and clear
it out, the less damage we suffer. In the same way, we may be engaging in
selfish but destructive behavior, or perhaps something that borders on being
illicit or dishonest. We minimize our losses by admitting the wrong and getting
back to our basic principles of living.
In cutting our losses, the usual barriers are pride and self-deception. While
these shortcomings will probably always dog us, we at least have experience
in dealing with them, or we wouldn't have made any progress in sobriety.
If a course of thought or action isn't working out well, perhaps it’s time
today to cut my loses in order to get back on the right track.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
People seldom improve when they have no model but themselves to copy.---Oliver Goldsmith
If we had to get well by ourselves, we’d be in trouble. We’ve already tried this route.
We need to learn a new way to live, not the old way we already know.
That’s why we have sponsors in Twelve Step programs. Sponsors are one of the best
things about our recovery. We pick people who are happy and doing well in recovery.
Then we copy them. We copy them because sponsors are special people who have
what we want. They have sobriety. They have happiness. They have common sense.
They have peace and serenity. And they will help us get those things too. We learn
a new way to live from them.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me pick good models. Help me copy what works for them.
Action for the Day: If I don’t have a sponsor now, I’ll work today on getting one.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Nobody told me how hard and lonely change is. --Joan Gilbertson
Pain, repeatedly experienced, indicates a need for self-assessment, an inventory
of our behavior. Honest self-appraisal may well call for change, a change in
attitude perhaps, a change in specific behavior in some instances, or maybe a
change in direction. We get off the right path occasionally, but go merrily on
our way until barriers surface, doors close, and experiences become painful.
Most of us willingly wallow in our pain a while, not because we like it, but
because its familiarity offers security. We find some comfort in our pain because
at least it holds no surprises.
When our trust in God is high, we are more willing to change. And we open
ourselves to the indications for movement in a new direction. Each of us must
find our own willingness. Each of us must develop attentiveness to the signs
that repeatedly invite changes in our behavior. But most of all, each of us has
to travel the road to change, singly. Changes we must find the courage to make
will never be exactly like someone else's changes.
Courage to change accompanies faith. My fears are telling me to look within
to the spiritual source of strength, ever present but often forgotten.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
Since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is well that a man exert himself there. He is not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his own roof. We know there are difficult wives and families, but the man who is getting over alcoholism must remember he did much to make them so.
p. 127
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
If I asked what the two most important things in recovery are, I would have to say willingness and action. I was willing to believe that A.A. was telling me the truth. I wanted to believe it was true in a way I cannot relate in words. I wanted this thing to work. Then I began to take the course of action prescribed.
p. 317
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Yet if A.A.'s experience means anything at all, this is not only unwise, but is actually a perilous resolve. Few muddled attitudes have caused us more trouble than holding back on Step Five. Some people are unable to stay sober at all; others will relapse periodically until they really clean house. Even A.A. old timers, sober for years, often pay dearly for skimping this Step. They will tell how they tried to carry the load alone; how much they suffered of irritability, anxiety, remorse, and depression; and how, unconsciously seeking relief, they would sometimes accuse even their best friends of the very character defects they themselves were trying to conceal. They always discovered that relief never came by confessing the sins of other people. Everybody had to confess his own.
p. 56
************************************************** *********
None of us has gotten where we are solely by pulling ourselves up
from our own bootstraps. We got here because somebody bent down
and helped us.
--Thurgood Marshall
Three things in human life are important: The first is to be kind. The
second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind.
--Henry James
"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used
when we created them."
--Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"Listen or Thy tongue will keep Thee deaf."
--American Indian Proverb
Rather than regretting that I wasted half of my life drinking, I am
just grateful that God has given me the rare opportunity to live two
lives in one lifetime.
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MINORITY
"The greatest good of a minority
of our generation may be the
greatest good for the greatest
number of people in the long
run."
-- Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.
I belong to a minority. I am a recovering alcoholic. I use a spiritual
program that keeps me sober a day at a time. I have a God that I can
understand today. I do a daily inventory and make amends when
appropriate, and I feel good about myself.
This spiritual program is reaching out to the world: gamblers,
overeaters, cocaine addicts, the families of addicts, the children of
compulsive people; obsessive people can all be helped by this daily
program of acceptance.
Perhaps the recovering drunk has stumbled upon a miracle that can
bring the world back to God!
Lord, the more I talk about my "difference" with people, the more
they and I feel the same.
************************************************** *********
"Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. Let your good spirit
lead me on a level path."
Psalm 143:10
"You have let me sink down deep in desperate problems. But you will
bring me back to life again, up from the depths of the earth!"
Psalms 71:20
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Talent is the ability to do easily that which others find difficult.
Lord, help me to recognize and value the abilities that I have been given and use them gratefully.
Simple trust in God is all that is required to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.
Lord, I love You. I trust in You. I am Your child.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Something Different
"We had to have something different, and we thought we had found it in drugs."
Basic Text p.13
Many of us have always felt different from other people. We know we're not unique in feeling that way; we hear many addicts share the same thing. We searched all our lives for something to make us all right, to fix that "different" place inside us, to make us whole and acceptable. Drugs seemed to fill that need.
When we were high, at least we no longer felt the emptiness or the need. There was one drawback: The drugs, which were our solution, quickly became our problem.
Once we gave up the drugs, the sense of emptiness returned. At first we felt despair because we didn't have any solution of our own to that miserable longing. But we were willing to take direction and began to work the steps. As we did, we found what we'd been looking for, that "something different" Today, we believe that our lifelong yearning was primarily for knowledge of a Higher Power; the "something different" we needed was a relationship with a loving God. The steps tell us how to begin that relationship.
Just for today: My Higher Power is the "something different" that's always been missing in my life I will use the steps to restore that missing ingredient to my spirit.
pg. 267
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Love, a thousand, thousand voices,
From night to dawn,
from dawn to night,
Have cried the passion
of their choices
To orb your name and keep it bright.
--William Rose Benet
We are each in the midst of unique lives, and our choices are based on our own experiences, so it's only natural that they all be different. One of us may choose to go to jail for protesting nuclear weapons; another may choose to pray for peace. Both are working for the same goal.
It is a sign of our love to respect others' right to choose for themselves, even to make choices we may not agree with. Perhaps a brother or sister likes music we hate, or a son or daughter wants to wear an unusual style of clothing. How often do we, in the name of love, try to force our choices on others? When we give the gift of letting loved ones choose what is right for them, it strengthens our ability to choose what is right for us.
Whose choices can I honor today, even if I disagree?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Mothers give sons permission to be a prince but the father must show him how.... Fathers give daughters permission to be princesses. And mothers must show them how. Otherwise, both boys and girls will grow up and always see themselves as frogs. --Eric Berne
Relationships with our fathers have been central in shaping our characters. We catch ourselves saying what we heard our fathers say, or doing something we know they did. Many of us have had pain and resentments in these relationships. We wanted more time than they gave us, or we longed for praise but got criticism, or we were never sure we measured up to them.
Some of us can change our relationships with our fathers. We can do it, not by asking them to be different, but by being our full adult selves with them. This new experience is the doorway to a new aspect of our selves. Many of us cannot change our relationships with our fathers, but being with our sons and daughters in ways that nurture their growth is another chance to redo for ourselves what we missed.
My father's importance to me is a fact I must surrender to. I will take what he has given me and grow with it.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Nobody told me how hard and lonely change is. --Joan Gilbertson
Pain, repeatedly experienced, indicates a need for self-assessment, an inventory of our behavior. Honest self-appraisal may well call for change, a change in attitude perhaps, a change in specific behavior in some instances, or maybe a change in direction. We get off the right path occasionally, but go merrily on our way until barriers surface, doors close, and experiences become painful.
Most of us willingly wallow in our pain a while, not because we like it, but because its familiarity offers security. We find some comfort in our pain because at least it holds no surprises.
When our trust in God is high, we are more willing to change. And we open ourselves to the indications for movement in a new direction. Each of us must find our own willingness. Each of us must develop attentiveness to the signs that repeatedly invite changes in our behavior. But most of all, each of us has to travel the road to change, singly. Changes we must find the courage to make will never be exactly like someone else's changes.
Courage to change accompanies faith. My fears are telling me to look within to the spiritual source of strength, ever present but often forgotten.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Times of Reprogramming
Recovery is not all-tiresome, unrewarded work. There are times of joy and rest, times when we comfortably practice what we have learned. There are times of change, times when we struggle to learn something new or overcome a particular problem.
These are the times when what we've been practicing in recovery begins to show in our life. These times of change are intense, but purposeful.
There are also times when, at a deep level, we are being "reprogrammed." We start letting go of beliefs and behaviors. We may feel frightened or confused during these times. Our old behaviors or patterns may not have worked for us, but they were comfortable and familiar.
During these times we may feel vulnerable, lonely, and needy - like we are on a journey without a road map or a flashlight, and we feel as if no one has traveled this ground before.
We may not understand what is being worked out in us. We may not know where or if we are being led.
We are being led. We are not alone. Our Higher Power is working His finest and best to bring true change in us. Others have traveled this road to. We will be led to someone who can help us, someone who can provide the markers we need.
We are being prepared for receiving as much joy and love as our heart can hold.
Recovery is a healing process. We can trust it, even when we don't understand it. We are right where we need to be in this process; we're going through exactly what we need to experience. And where we're going is better than any place we've been.
Today, God, help me believe that the changes I'm going through are for the good. Help me believe that the road I'm traveling will lead to a place of light, love, and joy.
Today I'm taking all the steps that I can for my recovery. My Higher Power is giving me all the guidance I need, and I am full of joy and gratitude that I am growing and healing today. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey to the Heart
Surrender to Your Feelings
Sometimes we think being strong means not giving in to our emotions. But that’s not strength, that’s denial and resistance. Real power comes from being vulnerable enough to feel whatever you feel.
Keep going, we tell ourselves. Don’t give in, This will pass… But the only way to pass through these times is by feeling what we feel. The longer we fight and resist our emotions, the longer the situation will continue that is triggering them.
We may not see the lesson until we feel the feeling. We may not see the issue, the next step, the way out or the way through until we give in, feel our emotions, then release them. It’s not enough to talk about them, although that will help bring them into consciousness, into the light of day. But talking about our feelings is different from surrendering to and feeling the emotional energy.
Feel the feeling, then release it. Now your soul and the universe can move you forward into new circumstances, into growth. An issue to work on– such as freedom, forgiveness, acceptance, love, or valuing some part of ourselves or our lives– may naturally and automatically emerge. If we pay attention to the process by which we grow, we will clearly see that each step of the way– feeling our feeling, accepting it, and then releasing it– triggered the next step of growth. Soon we will see that we are learning a new lesson. We are on our way again.
There is magic in allowing our feelings to pass through us, magic in giving in. There is power, more than we think in being vulnerable enough to feel what we feel.
*****
more language of letting go
Who do you say you are?
I was driving out to the skydiving center one day, mulling things over in my head. Before long, I'd be on the plane and it would be my time to walk to that door and jump out. The fears started brewing and building up. I don't know if I can do this, I thought. I don't even know if I want to become a sky diver or if this path is right for me.
"You already are a sky diver," a quiet voice said.
That's right, I thought.
When I first began recovering from my chemical dependency, I preferred to identify myself as a drug addict. "My name is Melody, and I am a drug addict," I'd say quietly at the group. One member of the group started harping at me after hearing me identify this way. "You're an alcoholic,too," he said. "And you should label yourself as that."
I resisted what he said for a while, and then I decided to give it a try. Finally at one meeting, I said the words aloud. "My name is Melody, and I am an alcoholic."
Now, I understand why it was so important-- not to him but to me-- to label myself as an alcoholic. Number one, it was important because it was the truth. In order to focus on my recovery, I needed to abstain from using both alcohol and drugs. Number two, whether this friend knew it or not, he knew the power of the Great I Am.
He wasn't asking me to degrade or limit myself. All he was asking me to do was identify who I really was and am. And by saying and acknowledging this, I helped create a new role, a new personality. I am now, at the time of this writing, by the grace of God, a recovering alcoholic and addict.
Most of us aren't one single thing. We're a parent, a student, maybe a recovering person, and a grown child. We form many new I am's as we go through life.
Watch each time you say the words I am in a conversation or thought. Pay attention to the times you say I'm not, as well. Then spend some time reflecting not only on who you are, but who you want to become.
Discover the power in your life from saying I am.
Who do you say you are and you aren't.
Give yourself a chance to become someone new.
God, help me understand and use correctly, to the best possible benefit of my growth, the power of the Great I Am.
*****
A Reason to Smile
Five Minutes to Happiness by Madisyn Taylor
If you aren't a naturally happy person, take time each day to cultivate that which brings you happiness.
It can be so easy to get caught up in the rigors of modern life that we tend to forget that happiness need not come with stipulations. Happiness becomes something we must schedule and strive for—a hard-won emotion—and then only when we have no worries to occupy our thoughts. In reality, overwhelming joy is not the exclusive province of those with unlimited time and no troubles to speak of. Many of the happiest people on earth are also those coping with the most serious challenges. They have learned to make time for those simple yet superb pleasures that can be enjoyed quickly and easily. Cultivating a happy heart takes no more than five minutes. The resultant delight will be neither complex nor complicated, but it will be profound and will serve as a reminder that there is always a reason to smile.
So much that is ecstasy-inducing can be accomplished in five minutes. Alone, we can enjoy an aromatic cup of our favorite tea, take a stroll through the garden we have created, write about the day's events in a journal, doodle while daydreaming, or breathe deeply while we listen to the silence around us. In the company of a good friend or treasured relative, we can share a few silly jokes, enjoy a waltz around the room, play a fast-paced hand of cards, or reconnect through lighthearted conversation. The key is to first identify what makes us dizzyingly happy. If we do only what we believe should bring us contentment, our five minutes will not be particularly satisfying. When we allow ourselves the freedom to do whatever brings us pleasure, five minutes out of 14 wakeful hours can brighten our lives immeasurably.
It is often when we have the least free time or energy to devote to joy that we need to unwind and enjoy ourselves the most. Making happiness a priority will help you find five minutes every day to indulge in the things that inspire elation within you. Eventually, your happiness breaks will become an established part of your routine. If you start by pursuing activities you already enjoy and then gradually think up new and different ways to fill your daily five minutes of happiness, you will never be without something to smile about.
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We hear often in The Program that pain is the touchstone of spiritual progress. We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism has to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. We no longer commiserate with all people who suffer, but only with those who suffer in ignorance — those who don’t understand the purpose of ultimate utility of pain. In Proust’s words, “To goodness and wisdom we make only promises; pain we obey.” Do I believe that pain is God’s way of trying to get my attention?
Today I Pray
May I understand that value of pain in my life, especially if I am headed breakneck down a track of self-destruction. May I know that pain is God’s way of flagging down the train I’m on before it gets to a bridge wash-oot. May I be thankful that pain forced me to throw the switch in time.
Today I Will Remember
Pain saves lives.
******************************
One More Day
What next? Why ask? Next will come a demand about which you already know all you need to know: that it measures is your own strength.
– Dag Hammarskyjol
Life is full of demands; we know and expect that. Most of us wish we knew about them ahead of time, but it’s just not possible to prepare in advance for stress. Negative stressors like a flat tire of a severe illness and positive stressors like a family reunion are typical of the demands placed on us throughout our lives.
Somehow, when these things happen, we manage to rise to the occasion. We may need to sue all our resources — physical and spiritual — to cope, but we usually find within ourselves the strength and enth7usiasm for the demands we face.
By knowing that I will be able to handle life’s crises with deep inner strength, I need not ask myself “What’s Next?
Anonymous
************************************************** ******************
Food For Thought
Hungering
Deep within us is a hunger, which is not satisfied by food. We hunger for love and fellowship with each other and we hunger for communion with our Higher Power. We were not made to be alone and isolated. Withdrawing into compulsive overeating makes the deep hunger even worse.
As long as we are alive, we will never be fully satisfied. There will always be more love to give and receive and more steps to take on our spiritual journey. In this sense, we will always be hungry. Spiritual hunger is a good thing, as long as we recognize it for what it is and do not try to appease it with material substitutes.
Our Higher Power has created us with a hunger, which He alone can satisfy. As our progress through the Twelve Steps brings us closer to Him and closer to each other, we experience a fulfillment, which we had not known before. We are learning to hunger for spirituality.
Bless our hunger, we pray.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
ABSTINENCE
“It’s a funny thing about life.
If you refuse to settle for anything less than the best,
that’s what it will give you.”
W. Somerset Maugham
When I first came to program, I was in the diet mentality. After a few “slips” I had to face the facts: I was in relapse, and I had never really surrendered. With the help of the program, I gained an increasing awareness of this progressive disease. Did I really want to recover? Was I really willing to go to any lengths to find relief from compulsive eating?
When I finally surrendered the food and began working the Steps, I didn’t know what to expect. All I knew was that food could no longer be the answer. With seven months’ abstinence, I now know that I have a long way to go in my recovery. However, one day at a time, I am willing to find my answers in the Steps instead of in the food. Thank you, Higher Power!
One day at a time...
I choose abstinence and will listen for God’s calling in my life. God’s will for me is the safest and most loving place I can be, and I know God wants me to live a life free from the compulsion to eat.
~ Christine S.
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort. - Pg. 25-26 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is the law of this physical earth which always leads to death and decay. It can be no other way in a material world. There is also the law of Spirit which leads to life and grace. Our addiction obeys the law of this earth plane, our recovery obeys the law of the Spirit.
Please, Divine Source, as I understand You, guide me to the law of Spirit and recovery.
Creating My Own Rituals
Rituals ground me in my own day. My morning tea, my walk through the park, dinner with my family. These are the daily rituals that give my life a sense of continuity and solidity. They hold me, they bond me with those I love. Recovery is full of rituals. Meetings, daily reading, sharing with friends and quiet moments of self reflection. Rituals that deepen my sense of life and remind me of what's really important. They are part of what gives my life its symmetry. I need these rituals to help me remember what to value. And they join me with with life, with the feeling of what we're all really made of under the skin. Rituals speak in their own voice and today, I am listening.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.'~ Zen Proverb
I don't have to understand how the Steps work, just that they do.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Pick them up, as long as they don't pick up.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm taking all the steps that I can for my recovery.
My Higher Power is giving me all the guidance I need, and I am full of joy and gratitude that I am growing and healing today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I wouldn't put myself in situations where I can only have two drinks and then can't get anymore. Not because I'm an alcoholic. It's just sort of an intuitive thing with me. - Bob D.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 13, 2018 17:17:46 GMT -5
September 13
Daily Reflections
REPAIRING THE DAMAGE
Good judgment, careful sense of timing, courage and prudence -
these are the qualities we shall need when we take Step Nine.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 83
To make amends can be viewed two ways: first, that of repairing
damage, for if I have damaged my neighbor's fence, I "make a mend,"
and that is a direct amend; the second way is by modifying my
behavior, for if my actions have harmed someone. I make a daily
effort to cause no further harm. I "mend my ways," and that is
an indirect amend. Which is the best approach? The only right
approach, provided that I am causing no further harm in so doing,
is to do both. If harm is done, then I simply "mend my ways."
To take action in this manner assures me of making honest amends.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
"No one is too discredited, nor has sunk too low, to be welcomed
cordially into A.A., if he or she means business. Social
distinctions, petty rivalries and jealousies are laughed out of
countenance. Being wrecked in the same vessel, being restored
and united under one God, with hearts and minds attuned to the
welfare of others, the things which matter so much to some people
no longer signify much to us. In A.A., we have true democracy and
true brotherhood."
Meditation For The Day
When you call on God in prayer to help you overcome weakness,
sorrow, pain, discord, and conflict, God never fails in some way
to answer the appeal. When you are in need of strength for yourself
or for the help of some other person, call on God in prayer. The
power you need will come simply, naturally, and forcefully. Pray
to God not only when you need help, but also just to commune
with Him. The spirit of prayer can alter an atmosphere from one
of discord to one of reconciliation. It will raise the quality of
thought and word and bring order out of chaos.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may bring peace where these is discord.
I pray that I may bring conciliation where these is conflict.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Wider Understanding, p.255
To reach more alcoholics, understanding of A.A. and public good will
towards A.A. must go on growing everywhere. We need to be on
still better terms with medicine, courts, prisons, mental hospitals, and
all enterprises in the alcoholism field. We need the increasing
good will of editors, writers, television and radio channels. These
publicity outlets need to be opened ever wider.
********************************
Nothing matters more to A.A.'s future welfare than the manner in
which we use the colossus of modern communication. Used unselfishly
and well, it can produce results surpassing our present
imagination. Should we handle this great instrument badly, we
shall be shattered by the ego manifestations of our own people.
Against this peril, A.A. members' anonymity before the general
public is our shield and our buckler.
1. Twelve Concepts, p.51
2. Grapevine, November 1960
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Learning to Cut my Losses
Honesty
Business people speak of “cutting their losses” when it becomes clear that
a venture is going sour. As recovering alcoholics, we need to practice the
same principle when we’re obviously on the wrong track.
If a resentment is developing, for example, the sooner we spot it and clear
it out, the less damage we suffer. In the same way, we may be engaging in
selfish but destructive behavior, or perhaps something that borders on being
illicit or dishonest. We minimize our losses by admitting the wrong and getting
back to our basic principles of living.
In cutting our losses, the usual barriers are pride and self-deception. While
these shortcomings will probably always dog us, we at least have experience
in dealing with them, or we wouldn't have made any progress in sobriety.
If a course of thought or action isn't working out well, perhaps it’s time
today to cut my loses in order to get back on the right track.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
People seldom improve when they have no model but themselves to copy.---Oliver Goldsmith
If we had to get well by ourselves, we’d be in trouble. We’ve already tried this route.
We need to learn a new way to live, not the old way we already know.
That’s why we have sponsors in Twelve Step programs. Sponsors are one of the best
things about our recovery. We pick people who are happy and doing well in recovery.
Then we copy them. We copy them because sponsors are special people who have
what we want. They have sobriety. They have happiness. They have common sense.
They have peace and serenity. And they will help us get those things too. We learn
a new way to live from them.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me pick good models. Help me copy what works for them.
Action for the Day: If I don’t have a sponsor now, I’ll work today on getting one.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Nobody told me how hard and lonely change is. --Joan Gilbertson
Pain, repeatedly experienced, indicates a need for self-assessment, an inventory
of our behavior. Honest self-appraisal may well call for change, a change in
attitude perhaps, a change in specific behavior in some instances, or maybe a
change in direction. We get off the right path occasionally, but go merrily on
our way until barriers surface, doors close, and experiences become painful.
Most of us willingly wallow in our pain a while, not because we like it, but
because its familiarity offers security. We find some comfort in our pain because
at least it holds no surprises.
When our trust in God is high, we are more willing to change. And we open
ourselves to the indications for movement in a new direction. Each of us must
find our own willingness. Each of us must develop attentiveness to the signs
that repeatedly invite changes in our behavior. But most of all, each of us has
to travel the road to change, singly. Changes we must find the courage to make
will never be exactly like someone else's changes.
Courage to change accompanies faith. My fears are telling me to look within
to the spiritual source of strength, ever present but often forgotten.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
Since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is well that a man exert himself there. He is not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his own roof. We know there are difficult wives and families, but the man who is getting over alcoholism must remember he did much to make them so.
p. 127
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
If I asked what the two most important things in recovery are, I would have to say willingness and action. I was willing to believe that A.A. was telling me the truth. I wanted to believe it was true in a way I cannot relate in words. I wanted this thing to work. Then I began to take the course of action prescribed.
p. 317
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Yet if A.A.'s experience means anything at all, this is not only unwise, but is actually a perilous resolve. Few muddled attitudes have caused us more trouble than holding back on Step Five. Some people are unable to stay sober at all; others will relapse periodically until they really clean house. Even A.A. old timers, sober for years, often pay dearly for skimping this Step. They will tell how they tried to carry the load alone; how much they suffered of irritability, anxiety, remorse, and depression; and how, unconsciously seeking relief, they would sometimes accuse even their best friends of the very character defects they themselves were trying to conceal. They always discovered that relief never came by confessing the sins of other people. Everybody had to confess his own.
p. 56
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None of us has gotten where we are solely by pulling ourselves up
from our own bootstraps. We got here because somebody bent down
and helped us.
--Thurgood Marshall
Three things in human life are important: The first is to be kind. The
second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind.
--Henry James
"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used
when we created them."
--Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"Listen or Thy tongue will keep Thee deaf."
--American Indian Proverb
Rather than regretting that I wasted half of my life drinking, I am
just grateful that God has given me the rare opportunity to live two
lives in one lifetime.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MINORITY
"The greatest good of a minority
of our generation may be the
greatest good for the greatest
number of people in the long
run."
-- Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.
I belong to a minority. I am a recovering alcoholic. I use a spiritual
program that keeps me sober a day at a time. I have a God that I can
understand today. I do a daily inventory and make amends when
appropriate, and I feel good about myself.
This spiritual program is reaching out to the world: gamblers,
overeaters, cocaine addicts, the families of addicts, the children of
compulsive people; obsessive people can all be helped by this daily
program of acceptance.
Perhaps the recovering drunk has stumbled upon a miracle that can
bring the world back to God!
Lord, the more I talk about my "difference" with people, the more
they and I feel the same.
************************************************** *********
"Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. Let your good spirit
lead me on a level path."
Psalm 143:10
"You have let me sink down deep in desperate problems. But you will
bring me back to life again, up from the depths of the earth!"
Psalms 71:20
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Daily Inspiration
Talent is the ability to do easily that which others find difficult.
Lord, help me to recognize and value the abilities that I have been given and use them gratefully.
Simple trust in God is all that is required to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.
Lord, I love You. I trust in You. I am Your child.
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NA Just For Today
Something Different
"We had to have something different, and we thought we had found it in drugs."
Basic Text p.13
Many of us have always felt different from other people. We know we're not unique in feeling that way; we hear many addicts share the same thing. We searched all our lives for something to make us all right, to fix that "different" place inside us, to make us whole and acceptable. Drugs seemed to fill that need.
When we were high, at least we no longer felt the emptiness or the need. There was one drawback: The drugs, which were our solution, quickly became our problem.
Once we gave up the drugs, the sense of emptiness returned. At first we felt despair because we didn't have any solution of our own to that miserable longing. But we were willing to take direction and began to work the steps. As we did, we found what we'd been looking for, that "something different" Today, we believe that our lifelong yearning was primarily for knowledge of a Higher Power; the "something different" we needed was a relationship with a loving God. The steps tell us how to begin that relationship.
Just for today: My Higher Power is the "something different" that's always been missing in my life I will use the steps to restore that missing ingredient to my spirit.
pg. 267
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Love, a thousand, thousand voices,
From night to dawn,
from dawn to night,
Have cried the passion
of their choices
To orb your name and keep it bright.
--William Rose Benet
We are each in the midst of unique lives, and our choices are based on our own experiences, so it's only natural that they all be different. One of us may choose to go to jail for protesting nuclear weapons; another may choose to pray for peace. Both are working for the same goal.
It is a sign of our love to respect others' right to choose for themselves, even to make choices we may not agree with. Perhaps a brother or sister likes music we hate, or a son or daughter wants to wear an unusual style of clothing. How often do we, in the name of love, try to force our choices on others? When we give the gift of letting loved ones choose what is right for them, it strengthens our ability to choose what is right for us.
Whose choices can I honor today, even if I disagree?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Mothers give sons permission to be a prince but the father must show him how.... Fathers give daughters permission to be princesses. And mothers must show them how. Otherwise, both boys and girls will grow up and always see themselves as frogs. --Eric Berne
Relationships with our fathers have been central in shaping our characters. We catch ourselves saying what we heard our fathers say, or doing something we know they did. Many of us have had pain and resentments in these relationships. We wanted more time than they gave us, or we longed for praise but got criticism, or we were never sure we measured up to them.
Some of us can change our relationships with our fathers. We can do it, not by asking them to be different, but by being our full adult selves with them. This new experience is the doorway to a new aspect of our selves. Many of us cannot change our relationships with our fathers, but being with our sons and daughters in ways that nurture their growth is another chance to redo for ourselves what we missed.
My father's importance to me is a fact I must surrender to. I will take what he has given me and grow with it.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Nobody told me how hard and lonely change is. --Joan Gilbertson
Pain, repeatedly experienced, indicates a need for self-assessment, an inventory of our behavior. Honest self-appraisal may well call for change, a change in attitude perhaps, a change in specific behavior in some instances, or maybe a change in direction. We get off the right path occasionally, but go merrily on our way until barriers surface, doors close, and experiences become painful.
Most of us willingly wallow in our pain a while, not because we like it, but because its familiarity offers security. We find some comfort in our pain because at least it holds no surprises.
When our trust in God is high, we are more willing to change. And we open ourselves to the indications for movement in a new direction. Each of us must find our own willingness. Each of us must develop attentiveness to the signs that repeatedly invite changes in our behavior. But most of all, each of us has to travel the road to change, singly. Changes we must find the courage to make will never be exactly like someone else's changes.
Courage to change accompanies faith. My fears are telling me to look within to the spiritual source of strength, ever present but often forgotten.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Times of Reprogramming
Recovery is not all-tiresome, unrewarded work. There are times of joy and rest, times when we comfortably practice what we have learned. There are times of change, times when we struggle to learn something new or overcome a particular problem.
These are the times when what we've been practicing in recovery begins to show in our life. These times of change are intense, but purposeful.
There are also times when, at a deep level, we are being "reprogrammed." We start letting go of beliefs and behaviors. We may feel frightened or confused during these times. Our old behaviors or patterns may not have worked for us, but they were comfortable and familiar.
During these times we may feel vulnerable, lonely, and needy - like we are on a journey without a road map or a flashlight, and we feel as if no one has traveled this ground before.
We may not understand what is being worked out in us. We may not know where or if we are being led.
We are being led. We are not alone. Our Higher Power is working His finest and best to bring true change in us. Others have traveled this road to. We will be led to someone who can help us, someone who can provide the markers we need.
We are being prepared for receiving as much joy and love as our heart can hold.
Recovery is a healing process. We can trust it, even when we don't understand it. We are right where we need to be in this process; we're going through exactly what we need to experience. And where we're going is better than any place we've been.
Today, God, help me believe that the changes I'm going through are for the good. Help me believe that the road I'm traveling will lead to a place of light, love, and joy.
Today I'm taking all the steps that I can for my recovery. My Higher Power is giving me all the guidance I need, and I am full of joy and gratitude that I am growing and healing today. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey to the Heart
Surrender to Your Feelings
Sometimes we think being strong means not giving in to our emotions. But that’s not strength, that’s denial and resistance. Real power comes from being vulnerable enough to feel whatever you feel.
Keep going, we tell ourselves. Don’t give in, This will pass… But the only way to pass through these times is by feeling what we feel. The longer we fight and resist our emotions, the longer the situation will continue that is triggering them.
We may not see the lesson until we feel the feeling. We may not see the issue, the next step, the way out or the way through until we give in, feel our emotions, then release them. It’s not enough to talk about them, although that will help bring them into consciousness, into the light of day. But talking about our feelings is different from surrendering to and feeling the emotional energy.
Feel the feeling, then release it. Now your soul and the universe can move you forward into new circumstances, into growth. An issue to work on– such as freedom, forgiveness, acceptance, love, or valuing some part of ourselves or our lives– may naturally and automatically emerge. If we pay attention to the process by which we grow, we will clearly see that each step of the way– feeling our feeling, accepting it, and then releasing it– triggered the next step of growth. Soon we will see that we are learning a new lesson. We are on our way again.
There is magic in allowing our feelings to pass through us, magic in giving in. There is power, more than we think in being vulnerable enough to feel what we feel.
*****
more language of letting go
Who do you say you are?
I was driving out to the skydiving center one day, mulling things over in my head. Before long, I'd be on the plane and it would be my time to walk to that door and jump out. The fears started brewing and building up. I don't know if I can do this, I thought. I don't even know if I want to become a sky diver or if this path is right for me.
"You already are a sky diver," a quiet voice said.
That's right, I thought.
When I first began recovering from my chemical dependency, I preferred to identify myself as a drug addict. "My name is Melody, and I am a drug addict," I'd say quietly at the group. One member of the group started harping at me after hearing me identify this way. "You're an alcoholic,too," he said. "And you should label yourself as that."
I resisted what he said for a while, and then I decided to give it a try. Finally at one meeting, I said the words aloud. "My name is Melody, and I am an alcoholic."
Now, I understand why it was so important-- not to him but to me-- to label myself as an alcoholic. Number one, it was important because it was the truth. In order to focus on my recovery, I needed to abstain from using both alcohol and drugs. Number two, whether this friend knew it or not, he knew the power of the Great I Am.
He wasn't asking me to degrade or limit myself. All he was asking me to do was identify who I really was and am. And by saying and acknowledging this, I helped create a new role, a new personality. I am now, at the time of this writing, by the grace of God, a recovering alcoholic and addict.
Most of us aren't one single thing. We're a parent, a student, maybe a recovering person, and a grown child. We form many new I am's as we go through life.
Watch each time you say the words I am in a conversation or thought. Pay attention to the times you say I'm not, as well. Then spend some time reflecting not only on who you are, but who you want to become.
Discover the power in your life from saying I am.
Who do you say you are and you aren't.
Give yourself a chance to become someone new.
God, help me understand and use correctly, to the best possible benefit of my growth, the power of the Great I Am.
*****
A Reason to Smile
Five Minutes to Happiness by Madisyn Taylor
If you aren't a naturally happy person, take time each day to cultivate that which brings you happiness.
It can be so easy to get caught up in the rigors of modern life that we tend to forget that happiness need not come with stipulations. Happiness becomes something we must schedule and strive for—a hard-won emotion—and then only when we have no worries to occupy our thoughts. In reality, overwhelming joy is not the exclusive province of those with unlimited time and no troubles to speak of. Many of the happiest people on earth are also those coping with the most serious challenges. They have learned to make time for those simple yet superb pleasures that can be enjoyed quickly and easily. Cultivating a happy heart takes no more than five minutes. The resultant delight will be neither complex nor complicated, but it will be profound and will serve as a reminder that there is always a reason to smile.
So much that is ecstasy-inducing can be accomplished in five minutes. Alone, we can enjoy an aromatic cup of our favorite tea, take a stroll through the garden we have created, write about the day's events in a journal, doodle while daydreaming, or breathe deeply while we listen to the silence around us. In the company of a good friend or treasured relative, we can share a few silly jokes, enjoy a waltz around the room, play a fast-paced hand of cards, or reconnect through lighthearted conversation. The key is to first identify what makes us dizzyingly happy. If we do only what we believe should bring us contentment, our five minutes will not be particularly satisfying. When we allow ourselves the freedom to do whatever brings us pleasure, five minutes out of 14 wakeful hours can brighten our lives immeasurably.
It is often when we have the least free time or energy to devote to joy that we need to unwind and enjoy ourselves the most. Making happiness a priority will help you find five minutes every day to indulge in the things that inspire elation within you. Eventually, your happiness breaks will become an established part of your routine. If you start by pursuing activities you already enjoy and then gradually think up new and different ways to fill your daily five minutes of happiness, you will never be without something to smile about.
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We hear often in The Program that pain is the touchstone of spiritual progress. We eventually realize that just as the pains of alcoholism has to come before sobriety, emotional turmoil comes before serenity. We no longer commiserate with all people who suffer, but only with those who suffer in ignorance — those who don’t understand the purpose of ultimate utility of pain. In Proust’s words, “To goodness and wisdom we make only promises; pain we obey.” Do I believe that pain is God’s way of trying to get my attention?
Today I Pray
May I understand that value of pain in my life, especially if I am headed breakneck down a track of self-destruction. May I know that pain is God’s way of flagging down the train I’m on before it gets to a bridge wash-oot. May I be thankful that pain forced me to throw the switch in time.
Today I Will Remember
Pain saves lives.
******************************
One More Day
What next? Why ask? Next will come a demand about which you already know all you need to know: that it measures is your own strength.
– Dag Hammarskyjol
Life is full of demands; we know and expect that. Most of us wish we knew about them ahead of time, but it’s just not possible to prepare in advance for stress. Negative stressors like a flat tire of a severe illness and positive stressors like a family reunion are typical of the demands placed on us throughout our lives.
Somehow, when these things happen, we manage to rise to the occasion. We may need to sue all our resources — physical and spiritual — to cope, but we usually find within ourselves the strength and enth7usiasm for the demands we face.
By knowing that I will be able to handle life’s crises with deep inner strength, I need not ask myself “What’s Next?
Anonymous
************************************************** ******************
Food For Thought
Hungering
Deep within us is a hunger, which is not satisfied by food. We hunger for love and fellowship with each other and we hunger for communion with our Higher Power. We were not made to be alone and isolated. Withdrawing into compulsive overeating makes the deep hunger even worse.
As long as we are alive, we will never be fully satisfied. There will always be more love to give and receive and more steps to take on our spiritual journey. In this sense, we will always be hungry. Spiritual hunger is a good thing, as long as we recognize it for what it is and do not try to appease it with material substitutes.
Our Higher Power has created us with a hunger, which He alone can satisfy. As our progress through the Twelve Steps brings us closer to Him and closer to each other, we experience a fulfillment, which we had not known before. We are learning to hunger for spirituality.
Bless our hunger, we pray.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
ABSTINENCE
“It’s a funny thing about life.
If you refuse to settle for anything less than the best,
that’s what it will give you.”
W. Somerset Maugham
When I first came to program, I was in the diet mentality. After a few “slips” I had to face the facts: I was in relapse, and I had never really surrendered. With the help of the program, I gained an increasing awareness of this progressive disease. Did I really want to recover? Was I really willing to go to any lengths to find relief from compulsive eating?
When I finally surrendered the food and began working the Steps, I didn’t know what to expect. All I knew was that food could no longer be the answer. With seven months’ abstinence, I now know that I have a long way to go in my recovery. However, one day at a time, I am willing to find my answers in the Steps instead of in the food. Thank you, Higher Power!
One day at a time...
I choose abstinence and will listen for God’s calling in my life. God’s will for me is the safest and most loving place I can be, and I know God wants me to live a life free from the compulsion to eat.
~ Christine S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort. - Pg. 25-26 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is the law of this physical earth which always leads to death and decay. It can be no other way in a material world. There is also the law of Spirit which leads to life and grace. Our addiction obeys the law of this earth plane, our recovery obeys the law of the Spirit.
Please, Divine Source, as I understand You, guide me to the law of Spirit and recovery.
Creating My Own Rituals
Rituals ground me in my own day. My morning tea, my walk through the park, dinner with my family. These are the daily rituals that give my life a sense of continuity and solidity. They hold me, they bond me with those I love. Recovery is full of rituals. Meetings, daily reading, sharing with friends and quiet moments of self reflection. Rituals that deepen my sense of life and remind me of what's really important. They are part of what gives my life its symmetry. I need these rituals to help me remember what to value. And they join me with with life, with the feeling of what we're all really made of under the skin. Rituals speak in their own voice and today, I am listening.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are.'~ Zen Proverb
I don't have to understand how the Steps work, just that they do.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Pick them up, as long as they don't pick up.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm taking all the steps that I can for my recovery.
My Higher Power is giving me all the guidance I need, and I am full of joy and gratitude that I am growing and healing today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I wouldn't put myself in situations where I can only have two drinks and then can't get anymore. Not because I'm an alcoholic. It's just sort of an intuitive thing with me. - Bob D.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 14, 2018 13:31:26 GMT -5
September 14
Daily Reflections
PEACE OF MIND
Do we lay the matter before our sponsor or spiritual adviser,
earnestly asking God's help and guidance--meanwhile resolving
to do the right thing when it becomes clear, cost what it may?
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p p. 86-87
My belief in a Higher Power is an essential part of my work on
Step Nine; forgiveness, timing, and right motives are the other
ingredients. My willingness to do the Step is a growing
experience that opens the door for new and honest relationships
with the people I have harmed. My responsible action brings me
closer to the spiritual principles of the program -- love and
service. Peace of mind, serenity, and a stronger faith are
sure to follow.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
"How does A.A. grow? Some of us sell A.A. as we go about.
Little clusters of twos and threes and fives keep springing
up in different communities, through contact with the larger
centers. Those of us who travel drop in at other groups as
often as we can. This practice enables us to lend a hand to
new groups which are springing up all over the land. New
groups are being started each month. A.A. is even spreading
outside the United States and is slowly becoming world-wide.
Thus we grow." Am I doing all I can to spread A.A. wherever I go?
Meditation For The Day
"Lord we believe. Help Thou our unbelief." This cry of the
human heart is an expression of human frailty. It signifies
the soul's sincere desire for progress. As a person feels the
existence of God and His power, that person believes in Him
more and more. At the same time, a person is more conscious of
his falling short of absolute trust in God. The soul's progress
is an increasing belief, then a cry for more faith, a plea to
conquer all unbelief, all lack of trust. We can believe that
that cry is heard by God and that prayer is answered in due
time. And so our faith grows, little by little, day by day.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that with more power in my life will come more faith.
I pray that I may come to trust God more each day.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
A "Special" Experience?, p.256
I was the recipient of a tremendous mystic experience or
"illumination," and at first it was very natural for me to feel that this
experience staked me out as somebody very special.
But as I look now back upon this tremendous event, I can only feel
very grateful. It now seems clear that the only special features of my
experience were its suddenness and the overwhelming and immediate
conviction that it carried.
In all other respects, however, I am sure that my own experience was
essentially like that received by any A.A. member who has strenuously
practiced our recovery program. Surely, the grace he receives is also
of God; the only difference is that he becomes aware of his gift more
gradually.
Grapevine, July 1962
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Walk In Dry Places
Am I getting too busy?
Time Management.
It's always risky when a recovering person gets too busy for meetings.
It's also dangerous when business and personal concerns crowd out
interest in the program.
We should never deceive ourselves by thinking that we're somehow
safe just because our time is filled with useful and interesting work.
Many of us have a tendency to become addicted to "busy-ness".
Though less destructive than drinking, this serves as an escape, just
as alcohol did.
The danger is that when the work no longer satisfies us, we'll find our
lives becoming empty again. We could then be very vulnerable to taking a drink.
We should never be too busy for the wonderful, constructive work of the program.
Far from taking time away from our other actives, work in the program will
enhance everything we do.
I'll try to balance my activities today, making sure that I have time for the program.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
You must look into people, as well as at them.
---Lord Chesterfield
When we were using alcohol and other drugs, we only looked at people.
We treated them like objects. Often, we could only see how they helped
us get high, or how they got in our way.
Now we can see others as people. We look into them. We learn about
their feelings and thoughts.
We care about them. What a wonderful change! We are fully human
again. We can have relationships.
When we look into others, we see life. We see beauty, courage, hope
and love. We see bits of ourselves and our Higher Power. What a miracle life is.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be fully human today.
Help me see You in others.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll look into someone. I’ll do this by having a
talk with a friend. And I’ll really listen.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
What a strange pattern the shuttle of life can weave. --Frances Marion
How shortsighted is our judgment about today's experiences! We'll see
with clarity where they may lead us only after we've reached our destination.
Of one thing we can be certain: Today's experiences, in concert with
yesterday's and all that's gone before, are combining to weave an intricate
life design, unique, purposeful, and for our ultimate good.
We need not feel remorse over lost chances or unproductive behavior in
the past. Our destination remains the same, and our arrival is guaranteed.
Our actions and decisions are never wrong. We may veer off course for a
time, but the design for our lives will pull us back on the track.
The program is part of the design for our lives. It's helping us to stay on
course. In fact, when we're working the Steps, we're at ease with our
direction, and we trust the outcome of our efforts to the power of the
program. We will add to the richness of our design, today, just as
we have every day of our lives. We can anticipate today's experiences
with an excited heart.
There is something special going on in my life today. I will give
everybody and every event my full attention.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
As each member of a resentful family begins to see his shortcomings and admits them to the others, he lays a basis for helpful discussion. These family talks will be constructive if they can be carried on without heated argument, self-pity, self-justification or resentful criticism. Little by little, mother and children will see they ask too much, and father will see he gives too little. Giving, rather than getting, will become the guiding principle.
pp. 127-128
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Following the principles laid out in the Big Book has not always been comfortable, nor will I claim perfection. I have yet to find a place in the Big Book that says, "Now you have completed the Steps; have a nice life." The program is a plan for a lifetime of daily living. There have been occasions when the temptation to slack off has won. I view each of these as learning opportunities.
p. 317
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
This practice of admitting one's defects to another person is, of course, very ancient. It has been validated in every century, and it characterizes the lives of all spiritually centered and truly religious people. But today religion is by no means the sole advocate of this saving principle. Psychiatrists and psychologists point out the deep need every human being has for practical insight and knowledge of his own personality flaws and for a discussion of them with an understanding and trustworthy person. So far as alcoholics are concerned, A.A. would go even further. Most of us would declare that without a fearless admission of our defects to another human being we could not stay sober. It seems plain that the grace of God will not enter to expel our destructive obsessions until we are willing to try this.
pp. 56-57
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"What helps me to go forward is that I stay receptive. I
feel that anything can happen."
--Anouk Aimee
"No man can think clearly when his fists are clenched."
--George Jean Nathan
To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to
go on creating oneself endlessly.
--Herni Bergson
"Happiness is an attitude of mind, born of the simple determination to
be happy under all outward circumstances."
-- J. Donald Walters
"A good laugh is sunshine in the house."
-- William Makepeace Thackeray
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MIDDLE-AGE
"Middle-age is when you begin
to smile at things that used to
cause you to laugh."
-- Anonymous
Today I feel so young at heart. I love to laugh, I mean really laugh; I
love to play and act silly in my life; I love discovering my "child" that
comes out to give balance to my life.
This was not always the case. Not too many yesterdays ago I was
serious, depressed, affecting a smile that did not come from within.
Alcoholism made me an unhappy man. Before I got sober my so called
"high" had changed into a boring "low"!
I was middle-aged before I was thirty. Today I feel younger than I did
twenty years ago -- and it shows. You are what you drink. Today I am
sober!
Thank You for the gift of "play" in my life.
************************************************** *********
"Only believe."
Mark 5:36
"For nothing is impossible with God."
Luke 1:37
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Daily Inspiration
It is nice to have the things money can buy, but be sure that you don't lose the
things money can't buy in the process. Lord, never let me forget who I am and
that which truly means the most.
When you have faith in yourself and God, you will know that you are loved and
safe and never alone. Lord, I am these things because You are always with me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Secrets Are Reservations
"Eventually we are shown that we must get honest, or we will use again."
Basic Text p.82
Everyone has secrets, right? Some of us have little secrets, items that would cause only minor embarrassment if found out. Some of us have big secrets, whole areas of our lives cloaked in thick, murky darkness. Big secrets may represent a more obvious, immediate danger to our recovery. But the little secrets do their own kind of damage, the more insidious perhaps because we think they're "harmless!"
Big or little, our secrets represent spiritual territory we are unwilling to surrender to the principles of recovery. The longer we reserve pieces of our lives to be ruled by self-will and the more vigorously we defend our "right" to hold onto them, the more damage we do. Gradually, the unsurrendered territories of our lives tend to expand, taking more and more ground.
Whether the secrets in our lives are big or little, sooner or later they bring us to the same place. We must choose-either we surrender everything to our program, or we will lose our recovery.
Just for today: I want the kind of recovery that comes from total surrender to the program. Today I will talk with my sponsor and disclose my secrets, big or small.
pg. 268
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Something can't happen every day. You get up, go to work, come back, eat again, enjoy some leisure, go back to bed. Now that's plenty for most folks. --Ntozake Shange
When we were all little kids, before we started school, the days felt so long it seemed like we had time for everything.
But when we started school, we had to start living by the clock, and in this way, we became very grown up. Sometimes we feel angry about living by the clock, all of us who are first grade and older! But there are things we can do to help us live with these limits.
First, we can learn to set a goal for each day, and once we have reached that goal--whether it's doing spelling homework, mopping the floor, or writing three business letters--we can announce to whoever happens to be around, "Now that I've completed that, I don't have to worry about one more thing to feel worthwhile."
Second, we can believe what we said! We can relax, do something fun, enjoy the pleasures that the day offers.
What is my goal for today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
When a person drowns himself in negative thinking he is committing an unspeakable crime against himself. --Maxwell Maltz
Negative thoughts can rule our lives as compulsively as an addiction. The feelings of power we get from holding a dismal and gloomy outlook deprive us of the positive and pleasant parts of life. Some of us have said, "If I expect the worst, I won't be disappointed. If I think the worst about myself, no one else can cut me down." It is like taking a driving trip and looking only for trash and garbage in the ditches, ignoring the beauty beyond. Indeed, what we see may be real, but it is a very limited piece of the picture.
When we have relied on negative thinking, it feels risky to give it up. We cannot do it in one day. We can begin by imagining ourselves with a more open attitude toward the world and ourselves. Then we can try it out as an experiment in little ways, with no commitment. Finally we reach the point where we can take a risk and entrust our Higher Power with the outcome.
Today, I will experiment with hopeful and positive thoughts about what happens.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
What a strange pattern the shuttle of life can weave. --Frances Marion
How shortsighted is our judgment about today's experiences! We'll see with clarity where they may lead us only after we've reached our destination. Of one thing we can be certain: Today's experiences, in concert with yesterday's and all that's gone before, are combining to weave an intricate life design, unique, purposeful, and for our ultimate good.
We need not feel remorse over lost chances or unproductive behavior in the past. Our destination remains the same, and our arrival is guaranteed. Our actions and decisions are never wrong. We may veer off course for a time, but the design for our lives will pull us back on the track.
The program is part of the design for our lives. It's helping us to stay on course. In fact, when we're working the Steps, we're at ease with our direction, and we trust the outcome of our efforts to the power of the program. We will add to the richness of our design, today, just as we have every day of our lives. We can anticipate today's experiences with an excited heart.
There is something special going on in my life today. I will give everybody and every event my full attention.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
What's Good for Me?
When we are soul searching, be it for the smaller or larger decisions we face during the day, we can learn to ask, is this good for me?... Is this what I really want?... Is this what I need?...Does this direction feel right for me?...or am I succumbing to the control and influence that I sometimes allow others to have over me?
It is not unhealthy selfishness to question if something is good for us. That is an old way of thinking. To ask if something is good for us is a healthy behavior, not to be ashamed of, and will probably work out in the other person's best interests too.
We shall not wander down a selfish path of self-indulgence by asking if a thing is good for us. We shall not stray from God's intended plan, God's highest good, by asking if a thing is good for us. By asking ourselves this simple question, we participate in directing our life toward the highest good and purpose; we own our power to hold ourselves in self-esteem.
Today, I will begin acting in my best interests. I will do this with the understanding that, on occasion, my choices will not please everyone around me. I will do this with the understanding that asking if a thing is good for me will ultimately help me take true responsibility for my life and my choices.
I am most grateful for the guidance I am receiving in my recovery. The more I open myself up to admitting I can't do it alone, the more I realize help is always there. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
There Is Power in Powerlessness
Sometimes we can’t help ourselves. No matter how hard we try, no matter how deeply we feel we should be doing things differently, no matter how committed we are to personal responsibility, free will, self-actualization, and self-determination, sometimes we simply cannot help ourselves.
We keep on doing the same old things. We can’t seem to change, even though we wish we could. It doesn’t mean we aren’t responsible, doesn’t mean we aren’t accountable. It means simply that for the present moment, we can’t change, can’t help ourselves, can’t do it differently.
Many of us have discovered a truth in these moments. There is power even in powerlessness. There is power in admitting powerlessness. By voicing the problem, by accepting the powerlessness, you are bringing– attracting– help. Ask for the help you need. Admit and accept your powerlessness.
Be gentle with yourself. You are not alone in your problem, your powerlessness, or your search for a solution. Let love lead the way to the answer you seek.
*****
more language of letting go
Affirm yourself
When I began flying and skydiving, I found myself fumbling inadequately with new roles or parts of myself. When I began writing, I found myself fumbling with that part of myself. I want to be a writer, I'd think, but I'm not, at least not yet. I have to get this number of books published and this number of good reviews first.
It can take years and many successes in any new area in our lives before we can confidently say to ourselves and others, I am. I am a sky diver. I am a pilot. I am a writer. Oh, the power of those words I am.
You may not have much parenting experience if your first child was just born last week, but you are a mother. I didn't have my ten-year medallion yet, but on the first day of my recovery I could honestly say, "I'm a recovering addict and alcoholic."
Who or what do you want to become? A good parent? A sober, recovering person? A good girlfriend, boyfriend, or spouse? Do you want to become happy, peaceful, tolerant? Don't wait until you're successful to tell yourself you're that. Start now by saying you are what you want to become instead of reinforcing the words I'm not. Yes, you have much to learn. Yes, there's a way to go on that path. And you may not be proficient at it, or an expert, yet. But you don't have to be to say those little words I am.
Help create the new part of your personality by using and affirming those powerful words I am. Then watch as a new part of yourself emerges.
God, help me use my creative powers to create a better, more fulfilling life. Help me use the words I am to create who you and I want me to be.
Activity: Create your own affirmations. We each have our own path to follow, we each have different needs at different times. Pick out one area of your life that you're working on. Then give yourself one affirmation that helps you create the new reality you're working hard to create. The first two words of the affirmation need to be I am. Say this affirmation out loud seven times while looking in the mirror. Do this three times a day, once in the morning, once midday, and once before retiring at night. Do this for twenty-one consecutive days, without missing one day-- or until you don't need to say it aloud anymore because you believe it.
*****
Like a Small Town
In a Hurry
In the effort to keep up we are so busy rushing from point A to point B that we forget to enjoy the ride.
Our lives have become increasingly fast-paced, and the effort to keep up often occupies all our time and attention. We are so busy rushing from point A to point B that we forget to enjoy the ride. We race to the store without noticing the leaves on the trees or the clouds in the sky. We go through the checkout line feeling too pressed to converse with the cashier or the other people in line. At the end of a day filled with this kind of frantic pace, we may begin to wonder what it is we do all these things for, if we don’t even have the time to occasionally stop and just take it all in.
Always being rushed and in a hurry doesn’t allow time for the soul to enjoy life, which is composed of small, ordinary moments, like watching snow fall from the sky, having a spontaneous conversation with a stranger, or lingering over a meal for several hours. Small towns and the people who live in them can teach us all a thing or two about living life to the fullest as a daily matter. City people have a tendency to think that their lives are full because they are doing so many different things, but in a small town, there tends to be more time left open to be spontaneous or take an extended moment of rest. This certainly doesn’t mean that we can’t live in a city and enjoy life fully—we can and do; it just takes a little more awareness.
One thing we can do, wherever we live, is bring awareness breaks into our day and take 10 minutes to simply look out the window and observe what’s happening outside. We might also choose to cultivate a relationship with someone we see regularly, such as a clerk at the convenience mart, a neighbor, or someone we see in the elevator at work. Taking time to have a conversation that is not necessary is a true luxury in this day and age, as is staring out the window. Participating in these acts of timelessness makes the biggest city in the world start to feel a little bit more like a small town. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Until we came to The Program, our lives had been spent running from pain and problems. Escape by way of alcohol or other chemicals was always our temporary solution. Then we started going to meetings. We looked and listened, often with amazement. Everywhere around us, we saw failure and misery transformed by humility into priceless assets. To those who’ve made progress in The Program, humility is simply a clear recognition of what and who we really are — followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be. Is The Program showing me what I could be?
Today I Pray
I pray for humility, which is another word for perspective, a level look at the real me and where I stand in relation to God and other people. May I be grateful to humility; it is the processing plant through which my raw hurts and ragged delusions are refined into new courage and sensitivities.
Today I Will Remember
Humility restores my “sight”.
******************************
One More Day
I loaf and invite my soul, I lean and loaf at my ease observing a spear of summer grass.
–Walt Whitman
Sometimes we may have wished we could be like Aladdin and have three wishes. We might have even made mental lists of the things we could ask for.
We know that just having material possessions is not a guarantee for happiness. We know there has to be a purpose to life beyond wealth, a reason to get out of bed each morning. Whatever our walk of life, whatever our state of health, we all need to feel worthwhile.
We can’t rub magic lanterns, but we can create important reasons for living, such as a paid job, volunteer work, gardening or another hobby, or just plain relaxing. Idleness is sometimes good for improving our attitude.
The power of relaxation is a strong reason to keep me from becoming stressed.
************************************************** *****************
Food For Thought
Emptiness
When we were overeating, we felt empty inside no matter how much we ate. Now that we are abstaining, we may still experience periods of feeling empty. This emptiness is especially likely to occur after an occasion to which we have looked forward with much anticipation.
Perhaps we expect too much from a person or an event and feel let down when reality falls short of our anticipation. Perhaps we find ourselves with a group of people whose conversation is superficial and relationships are phony. Putting on a mask and keeping it in place for any length of time leaves us feeling drained and empty.
Without honest, meaningful contact with other people, we are emotionally undernourished. In order to have the mutually nurturing relationships we need, our false fronts have to be abandoned. Through this program, we learn to seek out the kinds of people and activities that fill us and to avoid those that leave us empty
Fill my emptiness, Lord.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
SLOW SUICIDE
“He who does not use his endeavors to heal himself
is brother to him who commits suicide.”
Solomon
Rather than a regular, sudden suicide, I have subtly entertained the idea of slow suicide. I have neglected myself: my health, my vision and my gifts. I have either taken actions that have harmed me, or I have neglected to take actions that would have helped me to live a longer and more productive life. I have stuffed my face with garbage, accepting that as my fate.
Today I have a program that teaches me that I can’t take care of myself alone and that I can, and will, receive help. I accept that help with humility, taking the Steps I am shown and using the tools I am offered. I begin to see that I have something to offer others and my life takes on new meaning and purpose.
One day at a time...
I pray that I will say “yes” to my own life today, and take actions which represent that “yes.”
~ Q
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks -- drinks which they see others taking with impunity. - Pg. xxix - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Letting go of the past and the present is to admit powerlessness. This means that the outcome is not in your hands.
All I can do is the best I can do. I know that the results are in the hands of my Higher Power.
Staying Calm
Peace begins with me. I need to remember that emotions run high during recovery. My joys are higher and my longings are stronger. The world is more intense than it usually is. When I forget this, I start to feel out of step if I'm not where I think I should be, I compare my insides with everybody else's outsides and use that to make myself wrong. I want to push away my inner world and I get a little afraid of what I'm experiencing if it doesn't fit my image what I'm supposed to be feeling. Then I engage in a cover up, only the person I am covering up is me. When I do that, I am only half there. Today I will let myself have my full range of feelings, knowing that they may, at times, be a bit of a roller coaster, but knowing also, that I will land comfortably at the end of the ride.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
They say that you need only one meeting a week but it might be a good idea to go to one every night so you don't miss the one you need!
Seven days without a meeting makes one weak.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The people you hang with are the people you hang with.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am most grateful for the guidance I am receiving in my recovery.
The more I open myself up to admitting I can't do it alone, the more I realize help is always there.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm not the type who came out of blackouts screaming: Cover me I'm going in! I came out at the dry cleaners with the assistant saying; 'Boxed...or wrapped?' With an expression which said that he'd been asking this for some time and hadn't had any response - What do you say? 'Could you repeat that? I just got here myself.' - Charlie C.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 16, 2018 14:08:41 GMT -5
September 15
Daily Reflections
A NEW LIFE
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that.
It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous . . . .
Life will mean something at last.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 152
Life is better without alcohol. A.A. and the presence of
a Higher Power keeps me sober, but the grace of God does
even better; it brings service into my life. Contact with
the A.A. program teaches me a new and greater understanding
of what Alcoholics Anonymous is and what it does, but most
importantly, it helps to show me who I am: an alcoholic who
needs the constant experience of the Alcoholics Anonymous
program so that I may live a life given to me by my
Higher Power.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
"We all realize that we know only a little. God will
constantly disclose more to all of us. Ask Him in your
morning meditations what you can do today for the
person who is still sick. The answers will come, if
your own house is in order. See to it that your
relationship with God is right and great events will
come to pass for you and countless others. Give freely
of what you find in A.A. But, obviously, you cannot
transmit something which you haven't got. So make a
life-study of A.A." Am I always looking for ways of
presenting the A.A. Program?
Meditation For The Day
"In quietness and confidence shall be your strength.:
Confidence means to have faith in something. We could
not live without confidence in others. When you have
confidence in God's grace, you can face whatever comes.
When you have confidence in God's love, you can be
serene and at peace. You can rest in the faith that God
will take care of you. Try to rest in God's presence
until His life-power flows through you. Be still and in
that stillness the still, small Voice will come. It
speaks in quietness to the human mind that is attuned
to its influence.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may find strength today in quietness.
I pray that I may be content today that God will take care of me.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Key to Sobriety, p.257
The unique ability of each A.A. to identify himself with, and bring
recovery to, the newcomer in no way depends upon his learning,
his eloquence, or any special individual skills. The only thing that
matters is that he is an alcoholic who has found a key to sobriety.
********************************
In my first conversation with Dr. Bob, I bore down heavily on the
medical hopelessness of his case, freely using Dr. Silkworth's words of
describing the alcoholic's dilemma, the "obsession plus allergy"
theme. Though Bob was a doctor, this was news to him, bad
news. And the fact that I was an alcoholic and knew what I was
talking about from personal experience made the blow a shattering
one.
You see, our talk was a completely mutual thing. I had quit preaching.
I knew that I needed this alcoholic as much as he needed me.
1. 12 & 12, pp. 150-151
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 69-70
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Seeking Our Own
Harmony
Our feelings will often serve as good guides in determining what course
of action we ought to follow. If there is a persistent feeling of discomfort
about any situation, we should ask ourselves why we are feeling this way.
Perhaps it’s because we are involved with people or activities that are not
right for us.
In the same way, we will feel drawn to certain people and activities. This is
undoubtedly because we’re in tune with these people or activities. In such
circumstances, we can say that we are “seeking our own.” With our unique
temperaments and abilities, we fit better in certain places and with certain
groups of people than others.
We are indeed fortunate if we find that recovery in a Twelve Step program
is a case of seeking and finding our own. This must certainly strengthen
and enhance our program.
I'll seek out only the people and activities that seem to belong in my life.
If I do not belong in one situation, this merely means that a better one is available somewhere.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Often the test of courage is not to die but to live.---Vittorio Alfiert
What brave people we are! We have chosen life. Okay, maybe we had a
little push, maybe a big push from our family, police, or the pain of our disease.
But still, we’ve chosen recovery. We choose daily to let our Higher Power run
our lives. What trust! What faith! What courage!
We work hard at recovery. We do our meditate. We look for ways to serve others.
Each one of us is building a miracle. We can be proud of this.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll have the courage to love myself. High Power,
teach me to pat myself on the back when I deserve it.
Action for the Day: I will list three ways I am brave in recovery and share them with my group.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
When our myths, dreams, and ideals are shattered, our world topples.
--Kathleen Casey Thiesen
The act of "becoming" topples our world, and rightly so. We outgrow yesterday's
ideals, and we have begun realizing, in our unfolding, the dreams of last year.
Now new dreams call us. Recovery has toppled our world. Hallelujah!
In our abstinence, each day offers us fresh opportunities to "create" new
realities to replace the outworn, outgrown myths of the using days. But letting
go of the old takes patience, persistence, and strength. The old comforted us,
when there was little else.
Perhaps we need reminding that were it not for the shattered myths of last year
or last week, we'd not be progressing, unfolding, as the bigger picture calls us.
We have a part to play in this life, as do our sisters, our friends, our children.
New dreams and ideals will lead us on our way. Old dreams served us yesterday,
and the past is gone. They can't direct our present.
I will look with excitement at my toppling world. It signifies growth - intellectual,
emotional and spiritual. Old ideals will bind me--I will dare to dream new dreams
and go where they lead with confidence.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
Assume on the other hand that father has, at the outset, a stirring spiritual experience. Overnight, as it were, he is a different man. He becomes a religious enthusiast. He is unable to focus on anything else. As soon as his sobriety begins to be taken as a matter of course, the family may look at their strange new dad with apprehension, then with irritation. There is talk about spiritual matters morning, noon and night. He may demand that the family find God in a hurry, or exhibit amazing indifference to them and say he is above worldly considerations. He may tell mother, who has been religious all her life, that she doesn’t know what it’s all about, and that she had better get his brand of spirituality while there is yet time.
p. 128
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
When I am willing to do the right thing, I am rewarded with an inner peace no amount of liquor could ever provide. When I am unwilling to do the right thing, I become restless, irritable, and discontent. It is always my choice. Through the Twelve Steps, I have been granted the gift of choice. I am no longer at the mercy of a disease that tells me the only answer is to drink. If willingness is the key to unlock the gates of hell, it is action that opens those doors so that we may walk freely among the living.
p. 317
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
What are we likely to receive from Step Five? For one thing, we shall get rid of that terrible sense of isolation we've always had. Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off, nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn't quite belong. Either we were shy, and dared not draw near others, or we were apt to be noisy good fellows craving attention and companionship, but never getting it--at least to our way of thinking. There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand. It was as if we were actors on a stage, suddenly realizing that we did not know a single line of our parts. That's one reason we loved alcohol too well. It did let us act extemporaneously. But even Bacchus boomeranged on us; we were finally struck down and left in terrified loneliness.
p. 57
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"When your life is filled with the desire to see the holiness
in everyday life, something magical happens: ordinary life
becomes extraordinary, and the very process of life begins to
nourish your soul!"
--Rabbi Harold Kushner
"He who laughs, lasts."
--Mary Pettibone Poole
If there is any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any
fellow being, let me do it, and not deter or neglect it, as I shall not pass
this way again.
--William Penn
A L C O H O L I C S = A Life Consisting Of Helping Others Live Is Called Sobriety.
I have learned that my actions are far more important than my thoughts.
"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal
into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of
our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."
--Melody Beattie
"The more you recognize and express gratitude for the things you have, the more
things you will have to express gratitude for."
--Zig Ziglar
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
NONSENSE
"We find it hard to believe that
other people's thoughts are as
silly as our own, but they
probably are."
-- James Harvey Robinson
Today I am able to laugh at myself. I even "think" funny things. I sit
at airports and look at the faces, postures and mannerisms of the
people passing by and I smile, giggle and laugh in my handkerchief.
Then I think about what a funny man I am -- so ridiculously proud, so
pompous about the silliest things, so preoccupied about my own
importance -- and it is funny.
Yes, today I am able to laugh at myself. I know that people are funny
because I know I am. At meetings I hear people laughing about the
day's insanities and I can always identify. Even my relationships are
humorous. I try so hard to make a good impression while at the same
time offering the effect of detachment -- trying to be "cool".
God must have a sense of humor because He made you and me!
Thank You for the gift of humor -- it allows true humility to develop.
************************************************** *********
"What is impossible with man is possible with God." Luke 18:27
My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen,
slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring
about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:19-20
Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed--not only in my
presence, but now much more in my absence--continue to work out your
salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will
and to act according to his good purpose. Do everything without
complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure,
children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which
you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life--in order
that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.
Philippians 2:12-16
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Every day renew your purpose because without purpose your life will be empty.
Lord, grant that I am able to truly see the worth and value of my existence
and know that my presence does make a difference.
The value of each gift God gives us is doubled when we share it with someone else.
Lord, may I freely give without expectation of something in return even though
I know Your constant generosity.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Filling The Emptiness
"..we think that if we can just get enough food, enough sex, or enough money, we'll be satisfied and everything will be alright."
Basic Text p.77
In our addiction, we could never get enough drugs, or money, or sex, or anything else. Even too much was never enough! There was a spiritual emptiness inside us. Though we tried as hard as we could to fill that emptiness ourselves, we never succeeded. In the end, we realized that we lacked the power to fill it; it would take a Power greater than ourselves to do that.
So we stopped using, and we stopped trying to fill the emptiness in our gut with things. We turned to our Higher Power, asking for its care, strength, and direction. We surrendered and made way for that Power to begin the process of filling our inner void. We stopped grabbing things and started receiving the free gift of love our Higher Power had for us. Slowly, our inner emptiness was being filled.
Now that we've been given our Higher Power's gift of love, what do we do with it? If we clasp that gift tightly to ourselves, we will smother it. We must remember that love grows only when it is shared. We can only keep this gift by freely giving it away. The world of addiction is a world of taking and being taken; the world of recovery is a world of giving and being given. In which world do we choose to live?
Just for today: I choose to live in the fullness of recovery. I will celebrate my conscious contact with the God of my understanding by freely sharing with others that which has been freely shared with me.
pg. 269
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
He felt frightened at being different from his brothers and sisters. It scared him to be different. --E. B. White
How ugly and wrong it makes us feel to be different: to be tall when others are short, slow when others are fast, black when others are white.
The miracle, and paradox, is that everyone is different--and that is what makes us all the same.
When we think honestly about the people we admire--friends, sports heros, actors, musicians, parents, teachers, employers--we know that all of them, as human beings, not heroes, have felt out of place in their lives, probably many times.
Believing we are alone or different cuts us off from others. Climbing over that protective wall of "differentness" is scary, but it is guaranteed to set us free.
How can I let go of my "differentness" today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
When people are loving, brave, truthful, charitable, God is present. --Harold Kushner
For many of us, our spiritual awakening began when we first heard our Higher Power might be our group. We learned that God may exist in the connections between people in our group just as well as within each individual. As we members exchange care and help with each other, as each struggles to achieve complete honesty and wrestles bravely with old temptations, God is truly in our midst. Closeness flourishes because we felt so alone but then found friends who suffered in similar ways. It is an expression of a spirit beyond our rational control,
When we ask another member to listen to us, we contribute to the strength of this spirit. When we give someone a ride to a meeting or spread the word about this program to other suffering men and women, we make a contribution and receive its benefits. Even now, if we need a renewal of confidence in God's presence in our lives, we can telephone another member and just talk. We will quickly sense the spirit.
Today, I am grateful to feel God's presence in my life and within the people around me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
When our myths, dreams, and ideals are shattered, our world topples. --Kathleen Casey Thiesen
The act of "becoming" topples our world, and rightly so. We outgrow yesterday's ideals, and we have begun realizing, in our unfolding, the dreams of last year. Now new dreams call us. Recovery has toppled our world. Hallelujah!
In our abstinence, each day offers us fresh opportunities to "create" new realities to replace the outworn, outgrown myths of the using days. But letting go of the old takes patience, persistence, and strength. The old comforted us, when there was little else.
Perhaps we need reminding that were it not for the shattered myths of last year or last week, we'd not be progressing, unfolding, as the bigger picture calls us. We have a part to play in this life, as do our sisters, our friends, our children. New dreams and ideals will lead us on our way. Old dreams served us yesterday, and the past is gone. They can't direct our present.
I will look with excitement at my toppling world. It signifies growth - intellectual, emotional and spiritual. Old ideals will bind me--I will dare to dream new dreams and go where they lead with confidence.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting Through Hard Times
We are sturdy beings. But in many ways, we are fragile. We can accept change and loss, but this comes at our own pace and in our own way. And only God and we can determine the timing. --Codependent No More
Hard times, stressful times, are not all there is to life, but they are part of life, growth, and moving forward.
What we do with hard times, or hard energy, is our choice.
We can use the energy of hard times to work out, and work through, our issues. We can use it to fine-tune our skills and our spirituality. Or we can go through these situations suffering, storing up bitterness, and refusing to grow or change.
Hard times can motivate and mold us to bring out our best. We can use these times to move forward and upward to higher levels of living, loving, and growth.
The choice is ours. Will we let ourselves feel? Will we take a spiritual approach, including gratitude, toward the event? Will we question life and our Higher Power by asking what we're supposed to be learning and doing? Or will we use the incident to prove old, negative beliefs? Will we say, "Nothing good ever happens to me... I'm just a victim... People can't be trusted... Life isn't worth living"?
We do not always require hard energy, or stress, to motivate us to grow and change. We do not have to create stress, seek it, or attract it. But if it's there, we can learn to channel it into growth and use it for achieving what's good in life.
God, let my hard times be healing times.
Today I'm willing to take responsibility for my own life. I am willing to grow up and let go of my parents. I am filled with the sense of my own power and I choose not to give it away. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Heal Your Broken Heart
I lay on the cot in the bathhouse at the mineral springs. I was wrapped from head to toe in a woolen blanket. As I lay there, the blanket covering my face. I could almost feel each break line in my heart. I could feel the fractures in a way I hadn’t before. I knew then that healing my heart was one of the purposes of this journey.
Your heart may have been broken many times. Some breaks hurt more than others, but each break caused a fracture, a weakness in your ability and willingness to love, trust, and heal.
Don’t shut down. Don’t go away. Don’t tell yourself, My pain is not important. I’m stronger than that. That’s just the way life is. Those are all lies we tell ourselves, lies to hide the pain of the break. The smallest betrayal unexpressed, at least to ourselves, can cause damage to our hearts. Willingness is the key– willingness to feel all we need to feel, willingness to heal, to love again.
As you go deeper into your journey, deeper into your joy, go deeper into your heart. Mend and heal all those tiny breaks lines, all the fractures, all the cracks. As you go deeper into joy, you will go deeper into your pain, your grief, your losses. Don’t be afraid. That doesn’t mean you’ll return to despair or that you will live forever in grief and anguish.
Take the time now to mend the break lines. Go deep within your heart to help it heal. Bury the broken dreams. Release the hurts. Acknowledge the betrayals. And then lightly, gently, with love, rub a golden layer of forgiveness and love around your heart.
There comes a time in the journey to the heart when it is time to let it heal. The deeper we go into the healing, the freer we will be, the more we will know what we feel, and the more we will feel joy.
*****
more language of letting go
You are a work of art
All the arts we practice are apprenticeship. The big art is our life.
--M.C. Richards
What you do is not who you are.
You are more, much more, than that.
It's easy to get so caught up in what we do that we're only identifying ourselves through our daily tasks. I am a mechanic. I am a parking lot attendant. I am a doctor. I am a dishwasher. When we link ourselves too closely to our jobs, we deny ourselves the chance to ever be anything else. We limit ourselves by believing that's all we are and all we'll ever be.
Our concept of who we are is one of the hardest, but most rewarding ideas we can change. If you have been brought up believing that you are clumsy, you will probably demonstrate this belief in your actions-- until you identify that idea, let go of it, and let yourself be something else.
Don't limit yourself by saying you are just what you do. Stop seeing yourself as a static being. If I am "just" a parking lot attendant, then how can I hope to ever influence someone through my words, my art, my music, my life? But if I am a vital, living, growing, soul who happens to be parking people's cars, then everything I do can become a symphony. I can have an influence for good in the lives of everyone I touch. I can learn from them, and they from me. I can learn the lessons that I am supposed to learn at this place in my life, and I can move on to other lessons.
God gave us the power to change. You're more than what you do. You're a vital vibrant soul that came here to experience, grow, and change. Make a masterpiece out of your life.
God, help me realize the glory of my soul. Thank you for my mortality and for the ability to learn and grow.
*****
Healthful Slumber
The Importance of Sleep
When life gets busy, sleep is often the first activity that we sacrifice. Considered a luxury by many busy people, sleep is actually as vital to sustaining a balanced life as are breathing, eating, and drinking. Getting sufficient sleep can be a potent energizer, just as not getting enough sleep can leave you feeling drained and sluggish. While eight hours is the average amount of sleep most adults should generally aim for, the right amount of sleep varies for each person. Some people may thrive on just four hours, while others don’t feel well rested unless they’ve slept for ten hours. How much we sleep also varies, depending upon where we are in life. Young people often need more sleep, while older people may need less. But the benefits of sleep always stay the same. Regular and consistent periods of wakefulness and sleep are key ingredients to fostering a healthy body and a clear mind. It is during sleep that your body renews itself.
Often, the ability to forgo sleep is considered by some to be an asset. But while it may seem that the nighttime hours can be better used for more productive activities, sleep in itself is extremely productive. During sleep, your body and psyche are both regaining their strength for the coming day. You may have the unique opportunity to explore the hidden recesses of your personality while you are dreaming. Meanwhile, your long-term memories are reinforced. Many cultures engage in an afternoon siesta. Taking a nap is refreshing and can increase both productivity and creativity.
Many famous writers and artists have looked toward their dreams as a source of inspiration. Lewis Carroll is said to have conceived his idea for Alice in Wonderland while dreaming. The expression “sleeping on it” is more than just a saying. Answers to problems can come in your sleep and present themselves to your wide-awake self in the morning. The ancient Greeks valued sleep so significantly, they believed it was a gift from the gods. When you sleep well, you will awaken feeling alert, refreshed, and ready for life’s challenges. Getting enough sleep will ensure that you are centered, thoughtful, and aware throughout the day so you can live your full potential. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
No one welcomes pain with open arms, but it does have its uses. Just as physical pain serves as a warning that we may be suffering a bodily illness, so can emotional pain be a useful sign that something is wrong — as well as a warning that we need to make a change. When we can meet pain with the cause of the hurt, rather than running away as we did when we were actively addicted. Can I bear some emotional discomfort? Am I less fragile than I once had believed?
Today I Pray
I pray I may be better able to face hurt or pain, now that I am getting to know reality — good and bad. I sincerely pray that the super-sensitivity of my addictive days will disappear, that people will not feel they must treat me like blown glass, which could shatter at a puff of criticism.
Today I Will Remember
Throw away my stamp: “Fragile Handle With Care.”
******************************
One More Day
A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.
– Winston Churchill
Nearly everyone who has ever under gone a time of high stress has an intense need to talk about it. A person who has lost someone close may talk almost constantly about it. People who are admitting that they must deal with chronic pain often feel the same need.
We can and should expect our friends to allow us the comfort of talking about our feelings and experiences. As people who are suffering from pain and who are often driven to recount an illness’ history, we need to realize there is a point at which people no longer want to listen — they may want to leave instead. We must work — harder than we ever have before — to build a well-balanced life that has some happy or humorous stories to share.
I will leave room in my conversations for stories that make me and my friends feel good.
************************************************** ******************
Food For Thought
Peace
Our mental obsession with food gave us little peace. The refined sugars and carbohydrates, which we craved, left us jangled and over stimulated. Our guilt and self-hate kept us in a state of fear and turmoil. We raced about frantically in our minds trying to think of a way out of our misery.
Abstaining from refined sugar and carbohydrates gives us physical peace. Our body is no longer in an uproar; it is functioning calmly and efficiently. The Twelve Steps of recovery free us from the mental obsession with food and bring about emotional and spiritual peace. The more control we relinquish to our Higher Power, the more peace He gives us.
The peace, which comes through working our program, is not stagnant – it is rich and creative. It is the peace, which results from an ordered life and confidence in God. Instead of going in circles, both physically and mentally, we move in measured progress along the path, which our Higher Power shows us step by step each day.
Thank You for peace.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
~ STEP SIX ~
The Spiritual lift, the nearness to our Creator
that is experienced from humble invocation of His help,
and our willingness to be freed from old willfull thoughts and habits
are essential to successful attainment of these steps.
The Little Red Book
I am a compulsive overeater. I eat three moderate meals each day without exception. In between, I have nothing except sugar-free gum, water, diet soda, and black coffee. Today I am working hard to allow my Higher Power to remove my imperfections. The focus is on the removal of blame, resentment, fear, and self-pity. I want to blame. I do resent. I have a lot of fear, but with surrender it is not paralyzing. I easily feel sorry for myself and cry about it. All of this threatens my abstinence, which is about sanity. The weight loss is an extra reward. The ability to approach responsibilities and feelings is the life force which I cannot take for granted.
When food was my higher power it was hell. I take my disease and recovery seriously. It's choosing life over slow, torturous death. All my problems are the same, yet somehow they are livable. Continually asking for removal of my defects results in a decrease of anxiety. I believe fully that my Higher Power will remove my problems in a time and way which I have no control over, as long as I remain willing. Today I am completely willing. I am grateful to have been chosen for recovery.
One day at a time...
I can eat three weighed, measured and committed meals without exception. I enjoy my meals and feel satisfied by them.
~ Ellen ~
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. 'How can I best serve Thee - Thy will ( not mine ) be done.' These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will. - Pg. 85 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Our disease is NOT the drug, it is a system malfunction in the person. This malfunction is in the brain (neurochemistry), in the mind (irrationality), and in the spirit (immorality). Only by healing all three do we have any hopes of recovering.
May I understand that I am not fighting the chemicals that made me sick, I am fighting the malfunctions that make me want to use them.
Giving Back
Today I give something to the community of people in which I find myself. I look around me and wonder what I might add to the world, to someone else's day and I do it. I recognize that giving and receiving are one channel, that when I open my heart to give, I simultaneously open it to receive as well.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Egotism is that certain something that enables a man in a rut to think he's in a groove.
I am never in a rut when I can answer this question, 'What Step am I working now?'
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
United We Stand- Divided We Stagger.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm willing to take responsibility for my own life.
I am willing to grow up and let go of my parents. I am filled with the sense of my own power and I choose not to give it away.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
There are not too many people too stupid to get this program but there have been a lot too clever. - Unknown origin.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 16, 2018 14:09:48 GMT -5
September 16
Daily Reflections
WE STAND--OR FALL--TOGETHER
. . . no society of men and women ever had a more urgent need for
continuous effectiveness and permanent unity. We alcoholics see that
we must work together and hang together, else most of us will finally
die alone.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p.563
Just as the Twelve Steps of A.A. are written in a specific sequence for
a reason, so it is with the Twelve Traditions. The First Step and the
First Tradition attempt to instill in me enough humility to allow me a
chance at survival. Together they are the basic foundation upon which
the Steps and Traditions that follow are built. It is a process of ego
deflation which allows me to grow as an individual through the Steps,
and as a contributing member of a group through the Traditions. Full
acceptance of the First Tradition allows me to set aside personal
ambitions, fears and anger when they are in conflict with the common
good, thus permitting me to work with others for our mutual survival.
Without Tradition One I stand little chance of maintaining the unity
required to work with others effectively, and I also stand to lose the
remaining Traditions, the Fellowship, and my life.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Today, let us begin a short study of The Twelve Suggested Steps of
A.A. These Twelve Suggested Steps seem to embody five principles.
The first step is the membership requirement step. The second, third,
and eleventh steps are the spiritual steps of the program. The fourth,
fifth, sixth, seventh and tenth steps are the personal inventory steps.
The eighth and ninth steps are the restitution steps. The twelfth step
is the passing on of the program, or helping others, step. So the five
principles are membership requirement, spiritual basis, personal
inventory, restitution, and helping others. Have I made all these steps
a part of me?
Meditation For The Day
We seem to live not only in time but also in eternity. If we abide with
God and He abides with us, we may bring forth spiritual fruit which
will last for eternity. If we live with God, our lives can flow as some
calm river through the dry land of earth. It can cause the trees and
flowers of the spiritual life--love and service--to spring forth and yield
abundantly. Spiritual work may be done for eternity, not just for now.
Even here on earth we can live as though our real lives were eternal.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to make my life like a cool river in a thirsty land.
I pray that I may give freely to all who ask my help.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Beneath the Surface, p.258
Some will object to many of the questions that should be answered in
a moral inventory, because they think their own character defects
have not been so glaring. To these, it can be suggested that a
conscientious examination is likely to reveal the very defects the
objectionable questions are concerned with.
Because our surface record hasn't looked too bad, we have frequently
been abashed to find that this is so simply because we have buried
these selfsame defects deep down in us under thick layers of
self-justification. Those were the defects that finally ambushed us
into alcoholism and misery.
12 & 12, pp. 53-54
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The world will recover
Belief
If our recovery program is working properly, an amazing thing can
happen. Instead of being the bad actors of society, we become people
who can be considered solid citizens in every way.. So square that we
might even have sharp corners.
We might then start becoming critical of the world in general. "I've
recovered, so why does the rest of the world have to be the way it is?"
A person might say. "Why don't other people do something about their
resentments and fears, just as I have?"
In asking such a question, we're already in danger of becoming self-righteous.
We can remember, however, that our Higher Power has the same concern
for others that was shown to us. By the grace of God, and in God's own
good time, the world can and will recover.
I'll remember today that God is in charge of the world and will set all
things straight, just as I was brought to recovery.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Here’s my Golden Rule: Be fair with others but then keep after them
until they’re fair with you. ---Alan Alda
Often in our illness we were ashamed, so we let people take advantage
of us. We acted as if we had no rights. In recovery, we work hard to be
fair with others. And we deserve to be treated with fairness too. If
people are mean to us, we talk with them about it. If people cheat us,
we ask them to set it right. In recovery, we live by our human rights.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to stand for fairness.
Help me respect myself and others.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list people who have wronged me.
I will make plans to talk to those with whom I feel will listen.
I will let love, not shame or fear, control my actions.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
I long to speak out the intense inspiration that comes to me from lives
of strong women. --Ruth Benedict
Each day that we thoughtfully make choices about our behavior and our
attitudes, we offer ourselves as examples to others--examples of strength.
As women on recovery paths, we find encouragement from one another's
successes. No one of us met our experiences very successfully before
discovering this program. In most cases we lacked the structure that comes
with the Steps. Direction was missing from our lives. Too often we passively
bounced from man to man, job to job, drunk to drunk.
When working the Steps, we are never in doubt about the manner for
proceeding in any situation. The Steps provide the parameters that secure
our growth. They help us to see where we've been and push us toward the
goals, which crowd our dreams.
We have changed. We will continue to grow. The past need haunt us no
more. The future can be faced with confidence. Whatever strength is needed
to fulfill our destinies will find us. And our forward steps will make the way
easier for the women who follow.
What a blessing these Steps are! They answer my every question.
They fulfill my every need.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
When father takes this tack, the family may react unfavorably. The may be jealous of a God who has stolen dad’s affections. While grateful that he drinks no more, they may not like the idea that God has accomplished the miracle where they failed. They often forget father was beyond human aid. They may not see why their love and devotion did not straighten him out. Dad is not so spiritual after all, they say. If he means to right his past wrongs, why all this concern for everyone in the world but his family? What about his talk that God will take care of them? They suspect father is a bit balmy!
p. 128
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Over the course of my sobriety I have experienced many opportunities to grow. I have had struggles and achievements. Through it all I have not had to take a drink, nor have I ever been alone. Willingness and action have seen me through it all, with the guidance of a loving Higher Power and the fellowship of the program. When I'm in doubt, I have faith that things will turn out as they should. When I'm afraid, I reach for the hand of another alcoholic to steady me.
pp. 317-318
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
When we reached A.A., and for the first time in our lives stood among people who seemed to understand, the sense of belonging was tremendously exciting. We thought the isolation problem had been solved. But we soon discovered that while we weren't alone any more in a social sense, we still suffered many of the old pangs of anxious partners. Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts, and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn't belong. Step Five was the answer. It was the beginning of true kinship with man and God.
p. 57
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Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for
that determines our success or failure.
--Norman Vincent Peale (1898 - 1993)
"Happiness is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it."
"If you spend more time asking appropriate questions rather than giving
answers or opinions, your listening skills will increase."
--Brian Koslow
"Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far
more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment."
--Benjamin Franklin
"You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water."
--Rabindranath Tagore
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
DENIAL
"The worst vice of the fanatic is
his sincerity."
-- Oscar Wilde
The disease of alcoholism is "cunning, baffling and powerful", and it
manipulates us to believe "the lie". There is a point that we reach in
our disease where we believe that crazy behavior is acceptable.
Insanity becomes the order of the day. And when friends or therapists
try to give us a message, we discount them.
How can we break down this wall of denial? Well, there is strength in
numbers. If everybody we respect is disagreeing with us, then it is time
that we change. If our isolation has become a source of martyrdom,
then we need to reorganize our attitude for living. Insanity and
isolation are often companions; they feed off each other.
We need always to stay close to our recovering community. Strength
and sobriety is in numbers.
God, You gave me the message to become the message. Help me to
live it in the recovering community.
************************************************** *********
O lord hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy.
Psalm 130:2
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own
understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make
your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6
God...comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in
any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4
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Daily Inspiration
Never lose your laughter even in the face of trouble and your troubles will
not be as heavy. Lord, I will remain cheerful and peaceful as proof of my faith in You.
To love and be loved is the greatest of joys. Lord, inspire me with ways to show my love.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Emotional Balance
"Emotional balance is one of the first results of meditation, and our experience bears this out."
Basic Text p.45
Though each of us defines "emotional balance" a little differently, all of us must find it. Emotional balance can mean finding and maintaining a positive outlook on life, regardless of what may be happening around us. To some, it might mean an understanding of our emotions that allows us to respond, not react, to our feelings. It can mean that we experience our feelings as intensely as we can while also moderating their excessive expression.
Emotional balance comes with practice in prayer and meditation. We get quiet and share our thoughts and hopes and concerns with the God of our understanding. Then we listen for guidance, awaiting the power to act on that direction.
Eventually, our skills in maintaining near-balance get better, and the wild up-and-down emotional swings we used to experience begin to settle. We develop an ability to let others feel their feelings; we have no need to judge them. And we fully embrace our own personal range of emotions.
Just for today: Through regular prayer and meditation, I will discover what emotional balance means to me.
pg. 270
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The sign must come like dawn. You cannot see its arrival, but know when it is there. --Diane Wakoski
Let us take a break, sit by the river, and watch the current quietly flow. Let's just think, for a moment, about where the current is going, the shores it will brush on its way, the clouds reflected on its surface, the animals that come to drink from it, the bobbers it gently nudges downstream.
Our lives sometimes seem like the river, wandering to the west, the south, back toward the east, seemingly without direction at all. Yet we can take comfort in this thought, for, like the river, we are always headed in the direction we are meant to go. Without trying, without knowing, we are part of the larger pattern of things, and we nourish many others just by passing through their lives.
What shores will my life touch today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Sit loosely in the saddle of life. --Robert Louis Stevenson
Sitting loosely in the saddle is an image of detachment for us. Detachment doesn't mean we stop caring. It means we have an inner wisdom telling us what we can control and what we cannot. When we go to meetings and hear fellow members struggling with temptations to return to old behaviors, we need to detach. When family members or friends are engaged in an addiction, we need to sit loosely in the saddle by caring, but not protecting them from the results of their behavior. Sometimes close friends will be "off base" in the way they talk to us. We practice detachment by not being reactive to the person but being responsive to the inner message of what kind of men we wish to be.
We can't control another person's behavior toward us. Our inner security will never come from how someone else behaves. The most helpful thing we can do for someone is to listen and care; then we need to be ready to let go of the outcome.
I will accept the limits of my control over others. I will care and let go.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I long to speak out the intense inspiration that comes to me from lives of strong women. --Ruth Benedict
Each day that we thoughtfully make choices about our behavior and our attitudes, we offer ourselves as examples to others--examples of strength.
As women on recovery paths, we find encouragement from one another's successes. No one of us met our experiences very successfully before discovering this program. In most cases we lacked the structure that comes with the Steps. Direction was missing from our lives. Too often we passively bounced from man to man, job to job, drunk to drunk.
When working the Steps, we are never in doubt about the manner for 'proceeding in any situation. The Steps provide the parameters that secure our growth. They help us to see where we've been and push us toward the goals, which crowd our dreams.
We have changed. We will continue to grow. The past need haunt us no more. The future can be faced with confidence. Whatever strength is needed to fulfill our destinies will find us. And our forward steps will make the way easier for the women who follow.
What a blessing these Steps are! They answer my every question. They fulfill my every need.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Revenge
No matter how long we've been recovering, no matter how solid our spiritual ground, we may still feel an overwhelming desire at times to punish, or get even, with another person.
We want revenge.
We want to see the other person hurt the way he or she has hurt us. We want to see life deal that person just rewards. In fact, we would like to help life out.
Those are normal feelings, but we do not have to act on them. These feelings are part of our anger but it's not our job to deal justice.
We can allow ourselves to feel the anger. It is helpful to go one step deeper and let ourselves feel the other feelings - the hurt, the pain, the anguish. But our goal is to release the feelings, and be finished with them.
We can hold the other person accountable. We can hold the other person responsible. But it is not our responsibility to be judge and jury. Actively seeking revenge will not help us. It will block us and hold us back.
Walk away. Stop playing the game. Unhook. Learn your lesson. Thank the other person for having taught you something valuable. And be finished with it. Put it behind, with the lesson intact.
Acceptance helps. So does forgiveness - not the kind that invites that person to use us again, but a forgiveness that releases the other person and sets him or her free to walk a separate path, while releasing our anger and resentments. That sets us free to walk our own path.
Today, I will be as angry as I need to be, with a goal of finishing my business with others. Once I have released my hurt and anger, I will strive for healthy forgiveness - forgiveness with boundaries. I understand that boundaries, coupled with forgiveness and compassion, will move me forward.
Light is shining on my path today as I face in the direction of love and goodness. One step at a time is leading me exactly where I need to be. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
The Real Magic Is About to Begin
At some point in the journey, we may become tired, weary, and confused. Homesick. All the mountains, the scenery, the food, the people, the experiences just don’t do it for us anymore. We want to go home. What am I doing here? we wonder. Nothing worthwhile is happening. Yet another part of us knows the truth and whispers, Yes, something is happening, something worthwhile.
Feeling homesick is part of the journey. It can mean we’ve reached a turning point. “When we get to that place,” a friend said, “it means the journey has really begun.”
Stay present for yourself and all your emotions. You’ve worked through so much. Don’t stop now. Getting through this place, this point, will turn your life around. You’ve learned and grown, you’ve worked so hard healing your heart and cleansing your soul. Your spiritual growth has been profound. But until now, all the work you’ve done has been to prepare you for where you’re going.
You’ve seen only a little of what life has to offer. You’re about to walk through a door. Now that your heart is open, you’ll see, touch, and know even more of life’s wonders. It’s the reward for where you’ve been. Keep feeling your feelings and trusting your guidance.
Let the magic begin.
******************************
more language of letting go
Let your creative self flow
To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong.
--Joseph Chilton Pearce
Creativity isn't just something we do.
Being creative doesn't mean just drawing pictures, writing books, or sculpting statues out of clay. There's not a limited pot of creativity available only to the artists.
Creativity is a vital living force in the universe that is available to each of us, to assist us in living our lives. All we need to do to align ourselves with that force is let go of our fears.
Need a new idea on how to fix that room, that thesis, that relationshio? Need an idea about how to fix your life? Let yourself be creative. Encourage your ideas to flow. Listen to your intuition, to your spirit.
Listen to that small idea you have, the one you have so much passion for. Let go of your rational thought process just for a moment. Let creativity help you live your life. Ask the Creator for help.
God, show me how creative I am and can be. Give me the courage to be willing to make mistakes as I create my path with heart.
*****
Making Life Yours
Perception
There is no secret recipe for happiness and contentment. The individuals who move through life joyously have not necessarily been blessed with lives of abundance, love, success, and prosperity. Such people have, however, been blessed with the ability to take the circumstances they’ve been handed and make them into something great. Our individual realities are colored by perception—delight and despair come from within rather than without. Situations we regard as fortuitous please us while situations we judge inauspicious cause us no end of grief. Yet if we can look at all we have accomplished without dwelling on our perceived misfortune and make each new circumstance our own, the world as a whole becomes a brighter place. A simple shift in attitude can help us recognize and unearth the hidden potential for personal and outer world fulfillment in every event, every relationship, every duty, and every setback.
The universe is often an unpredictable and chaotic place, and the human tendency is to focus on the negative and assume the positive will care for itself. But life can be no more or no less than what you make of it. If you are working in a job you dislike, you can concentrate on the positive aspects of the position and approach your work with gusto. What can you do with this job that can turn it around so you do love it. When faced with the prospect of undertaking a task you fear, you can view it as an opportunity to discover what you are truly capable of doing. Similarly, unexpected events, when viewed as surprises, can add flavor to your existence. By choosing to love life no matter what crosses your path, you can create an atmosphere of jubilance that is wonderfully infectious. A change in perspective is all it takes to change your world, but you must be willing to adopt an optimistic, hopeful mind-set.
To make a conscious decision to be happy is not enough. You must learn to observe life’s complexities through the eyes of a child seeing everything for the first time. You must furthermore divest yourself of preconceived notions of what is good and what is bad so that you can appreciate the rich insights concealed in each stage of your life’s journey. And you must strive to discover the dual joys of wanting what you have. As you gradually shift your perspective, your existence will be imbued with happiness and contentment that will remain with you forever. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We learn from others in The Program that the best way to deal with painful situations is to meet them head-on, to deal with them honestly and realistically, and to try to learn from them and use them as springboards for growth. Through The Program and our contact with a Higher Power, we can find the courage to use pain for triumphant growth. Will I believe that whatever pain I experience is a small price to pay for the joy of becoming the person I was always meant to be?
Today I Pray
May my Higher Power give me the courage I need to stop running away from painful situations. The chemical was my escape hatch, the trap door I counted on to swallow me when life became too monstrous or villainous to bear. Now that I have locked that door, may I face pain and learn from it.
Today I Will Remember
My compulsion: a trap-door and a trap.
******************************
One More Day
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will to strive, to seek, to find and not to yield.
– Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Some privacy is given up when we develop a chronic illness, for doctors and nurses need to know details of our medical histories. We can develop new strengths to offset this loss–pride that we are taking care of ourselves, and knowledge about our medical condition.
Many of the private battles we fight concern our feelings about having a chronic health problem. We may have to yield on some points — privacy, dependence, time, and energy — but we can continue to make personal gains in spite of our health.
Just because my health has changed does not mean I need to yield on points which matter to my well-being.
************************************************** ******************
Food For Thought
Understanding
The understanding, which we gain through the OA program, is a source of constant amazement and gratitude. First, we begin to understand our illness. Then, we grow in understanding of others and ourselves. Finally, our eyes are opened more and more to the spiritual aspects of our existence.
Hearing someone else’s story gives us insight into our own behavior. We act as mirrors, reflecting each other’s problems and solutions. As we act, we are given greater understanding of why we do what we do and how we may function better. In order to gain more understanding, we must first act on the knowledge we have. Intellectual awareness alone will not enable us to control our disease.
The empathy and understanding, which we receive from fellow OA members, give us the strength and hope to recover. We begin to see where our attitudes were wrong and how to go about correcting them. As we acknowledge the Power greater than ourselves and give our lives over to Him, we open a new channel of spiritual insight and understanding.
May I understand.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
REDISCOVERY
“When you come right down to it,
the secret of having it all is loving it all.”
Dr. Joyce Brothers
In dealing with compulsive eating issues, we tend to lose ourselves to the darkness of low self-esteem and self-criticism. We are our own worst enemies and we don't know how to nurture ourselves. We don't like who we have become. We feel like failures to ourselves and to all of those around us.
In working through the program, we learn to surrender and to accept the things we cannot change. We gain wisdom and strength. As we learn to take care of ourselves, we begin to feel good. We become self-aware. We recognize our needs and work aggressively to make sure they are being fulfilled.
We realize that we can choose how to react to the things around us. We accept our true selves, we voice our opinions, and we make changes. We realize that people do accept us the way we are and we don't have to hide anymore. For the first time, we are able to re-discover our true identity.
One day at a time...
I learn something new about myself. I accept myself for who I am as I surrender myself to my Higher Power. I prioritize my needs and all of the responsibilities in my life. I find the courage to change the things I can, and I accept the things I cannot. I look in the mirror and, with each passing day in recovery, I like who I see.
~ Lori
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The old pleasures were gone. They were but memories. Never could we recapture the great moments of the past. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. There was always one more attempt -- and one more failure. - Pg. 151 - A Vision For You
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
'Let Go and Let God' is a simple phrase that helps us realize that we are not in charge of the world. Our need to control and manage all things in our life will soon be replaced as we allow Our Spiritual Source to operate.
Let this phrase gently lead me to practice Step three each time I hear it in a meeting or see it written on the walls of our meetings.
Paying it Forward
Today I will show my gratitude for the many kindnesses I have received by paying it forward, by giving what I have so appreciated getting to another individual. I remember how good it felt to have some one reach out to me in generosity. I will do that for someone today. I will see an opportunity to give and I will give. Whether it's a smile, an encouraging word, an extra moment of my time or some kind of object. I will not hang on to it, I will give it. And when I do give it I will say a quiet thank you to the person who gave to me. I will see the gift going full circle.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You will respect yourself to the degree that you do not violate your own value system.
Self-respect is the most important respect I can earn.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
There are no musts in our program, but a lot of 'have-tos'.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Light is shining on my path today as I face in the direction of love and goodness.
One step at a time is leading me exactly where I need to be.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I drank like eight pigs. - Mike.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 16, 2018 14:11:10 GMT -5
September 17
Daily Reflections
FREEDOM FROM FEAR
When, with God's help, we calmly accepted our lot,
then we found we could live at peace with ourselves
and show others who still suffered the same fears
that they could get over them, too. We found that
freedom from fear was more important than freedom
from want.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 122
Material values ruled my life for many years during
my active alcoholism. I believed that all of my
possessions would make me happy, yet I still felt
bankrupt after I obtained them. When I first came
into A. A., I found out about a new way of living.
As a result of learning to trust others, I began to
believe in a power greater than myself. Having faith
freed me from the bondage of self. As material gains
were replaced by the gifts of the spirit, my life
became manageable. I then chose to share my
experiences with other alcoholics.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Step One is, "We admitted we were powerless over
alcohol--that our lives had become unmanageable."
This step states the membership requirement of A.A.
We must admit that our lives are disturbed. We must
accept the fact that we are helpless before the
power of alcohol. We must admit that we are licked
as far as drinking is concerned and that we need
help. We must be willing to accept the bitter fact
that we cannot drink like normal people. And we must
make, as gracefully as possible, a surrender to the
inevitable fact that we just stop drinking. Is it difficult
for me to admit that I am different from normal drinkers?
Meditation For The Day
"Show us the way, O Lord, and let us walk in Thy paths."
There seems to be a right way to live and a wrong way.
You can make a practical test. When you live the right
way, things seem to work out well for you. When you live
the wrong way, things seem to work out badly for you.
You seem to take out of life about what you put into it.
If you disobey the laws of nature, the chances are that
you will be unhealthy. If you disobey the spiritual and
moral laws, the chances are that you will be unhappy.
By following the laws of nature, and the spiritual laws
of honesty, purity, unselfishness, and love, you can
expect to be reasonably healthy and happy.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to live the right way.
I pray that I may follow the path that leads to a better life.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Servant, Not Master, p.259
In A.A., we found that it did not matter too much what our
material condition was, but it mattered greatly what our spiritual
condition was. As we improved our spiritual outlook, money
gradually became our servant and not our master. It became a
means of exchanging love and services with those about us.
********************************
One of A.A.'s Loners is an Austrian sheepman who lives two thousand
miles from the nearest town, where yearly he sells his wool. In order
to be paid the best prices he has to get to town during a certain
month. But when he heard that a big regional A.A. meeting was to be
held at a later date when wool prices would have fallen, he gladly
took heavy financial loss in order to make his journey then. That's
how much an A.A. meeting means to him.
1. 12 & 12, p.122
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.31
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The world will recover
Belief
If our recovery program is working properly, an amazing thing can
happen. Instead of being the bad actors of society, we become people
who can be considered solid citizens in every way.. So square that we
might even have sharp corners.
We might then start becoming critical of the world in general. "I've
recovered, so why does the rest of the world have to be the way it is?"
A person might say. "Why don't other people do something about their
resentments and fears, just as I have?"
In asking such a question, we're already in danger of becoming self-righteous.
We can remember, however, that our Higher Power has the same concern for
others that was shown to us. By the grace of God, and in God's own good time,
the world can and will recover.
I'll remember today that God is in charge of the world and will set all things
straight, just as I was brought to recovery.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
It is better to be wanted too much than not a all.---Anonymous
It may seem that so many people want our time and love. Parents say we
don’t call often enough. Children demand our time. Our partners say we’re
gone to much. Our sponsor tells us to check in more often.
When we feel off balance by all these people, we need to stop and rest. We
need to remember how lonely we were when we were using. No one wanted
our time and love then! Now we’re important to others again.
You can handle all this by giving people what they need and ask for, within
reason---not what you think they need, which may be way too much. Maybe
you need Al-Anon, to learn to love others while taking care of yourself.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me put my time and energy to
best use today. Help me find the balance I need between work, play,
loving others, and self-care.
Action for the Day: When I feel I have to give too much today, I’ll stop
and ask my Higher Power for guidance.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Desire and longing are the whips of God. --Anna Wickham
Our dreams and desires inspire us to reach beyond our present stopping-place.
That which we can achieve will draw our attention, and with certainty, a partner
is on hand to help us chart the steps for realizing the goal.
Before our introduction to the Twelve Steps, we experienced desires and set
many goals. Some we attained. What we often lacked was confidence, and then
our commitment wavered. The program is helping us realize that all pure desires
are attainable when we invite the program's structure into our daily planning.
Our lives are purposeful. Each of us is fulfilling a necessary role. The longings
that tug at us, longings that bring no harm to others, or ourselves push us to
realize our full potential.
Courage and strength, ability and resourcefulness are never lacking when we
follow the guidance within and trust in its direction. All the wisdom necessary
for succeeding at any task, completing any goal, charting any desire, is as close
as our attention is to God.
I will pay heed to my desires today. I will pray for the wisdom to fulfill them.
All doors will open and my steps will be guided, when the desire is spiritually sound.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
He is not so unbalanced as they might think. Many of us have experienced dad’s elation. We have indulged in spiritual intoxication. Like a gaunt prospector, belt drawn in over the ounce of food, our pick struck gold. Joy at our release from a lifetime frustration knew no bounds. Father feels he has struck something better than gold. For a time he may try to hug the new treasure to himself. He may not see at once that he has barely scratched a limitless lode which will pay dividends only if he mines it for the rest of his life and insists on giving away the entire product.
pp. 128-129
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Life has not heaped monetary riches upon my head, nor have I achieved fame in the eyes of the world. My blessings cannot be measured in those terms. No amount of money or fame could equal what has been given me. Today I can walk down any street, anywhere, without the fear of meeting someone I've harmed. Today my thoughts are not consumed with craving for the next drink or regret for the damage I did on the last drunk.
p. 318
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
This vital Step was also the means by which we began to get the feeling that we could be forgiven, no matter what we had thought or done. Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors or spiritual advisers that we first felt truly able to forgive others, no matter how deeply we felt they had wronged us. Our moral inventory had persuaded us that all-round forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too.
pp. 57-58
************************************************** *********
"Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart."
--Kahlil Gibran
Yesterday is a canceled check,
tomorrow is a promissory note,
today is cash in the bank.
Yesterday is history,
Tomorrow's a mystery,
Live just for today.
Today is a gift that is why they call it the present.
When special feelings come your way,
let them flow into your heart.
When miracles try to find you, don't hide.
When special people come along,
let them know what a blessing they are.
Let your smiles begin way down, deep inside.
--Collin McCarthy
"I can do nothing to change the past except stop repeating it in the present."
--Courage to Change
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PEOPLE-PLEASING
"I cannot give you the formula
for success, but I can give you
the formula for failure, which is
try to please everybody."
-- Herbert Bayard Swope
Part of my recovery is not that I never "people-please" but that I
know when I am doing it . . . and I am doing it less!
My low self-esteem was revealed in the way I would say what I felt
you wanted to hear, do what you wanted to do, go where you wanted
to go -- and for years I missed me. For years I missed my life because I
was preoccupied with other people. And I wasn't honest. I hated being
that way but I wouldn't admit it. Now I see that my guilt around my
addiction led me into this sick cycle, and recovery is taking me out of
it. Today I say "I don't want to go." "I don't agree with what you are
saying." "I refuse to do that."
My dignity is being discovered in my straight forwardness.
God, may I have the courage to share my true feelings.
************************************************** *********
"Lead me in your truth, and teach me, for you are the God of my
salvation; for you I wait all day long."
Psalm 25:5
"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made
perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus
took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken
hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining
toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for
which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 3:12-14
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
When something threatens your peace, do not give it an importance it doesn't have
by allowing it to fester in your mind. Lord, there is no situation beyond Your ability to correct.
Use the power of positive images in your mind to bring about good experiences. Lord, I
will let my faith in You nourish my thoughts so that I can develop a healthy and joyful reality.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Going Beyond Step Five
"We may think that we have done enough by writing about our past. We cannot afford this mistake."
Basic Text p.32
Some of us aren't too keen on writing out our Fourth Step; others take it to an obsessive extreme. To our sponsor's growing dismay, we inventory ourselves again and again. We discover everything there is to know about why we were the way we were. We have the idea that thinking, writing, and talking about our past is enough. We hear none of our sponsor's suggestions to become entirely ready to have our defects removed or make amends for the harm we've caused. We simply write more about those defects and delightedly share our fresh insights. Finally, our worn-out sponsor withdraws from us in self-defense.
Extreme as this scenario may seem, many of us have found ourselves in just such a situation. Thinking, writing, and talking about what was wrong with us made us feel like we had it all under control. Sooner or later, however, we realized we were stuck in our problems, the solutions nowhere in sight. We knew that, if we wanted to live differently, we would have to move on beyond Step Five in our program. We began to seek the willingness to have a Higher Power remove the character defects of which we'd become so intensely aware. We made amends for the destruction we had caused others in acting out on those defects. Only then did we begin to experience the freedom of an awakening spirit. Today, we're no longer victims; we are free to move on in our recovery.
Just for today: Although necessary, Steps Four and Five alone will not bring about emotional and spiritual recovery. I will take them, and then I will act on them.
pg. 271
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Hope is the thing with feathers
that perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.
--Emily Dickinson
We often hum and sing to ourselves because it makes us feel content. It is the melody itself that makes us feel good--words and thoughts do not matter.
Having hope for ourselves and for our universe is like having a melody always moving inside us. The melody may be calm or exciting, but most of all it brings with it beauty and a sense of peace. Hope can overcome the need for words and thoughts and promises. Hope is the melody that keeps us going, the hum that continues even when there are no words to the song. Hope is not a melody we think about--it must come when we believe in the goodness of our world. If we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we will be able to find the melody of hope inside us at all times.
What is my hope for today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Self-love, my liege, is not so vile a sin as self-neglecting. --William Shakespeare
An important part of our lives is simply tending to our basic needs --sitting down daily to share a meal with loved ones, getting enough sleep, setting time aside for haircuts and polishing shoes, spending leisure time with friends. Paying attention to these things only when they become crises makes our lives unbalanced and crisis oriented. Many men have neglected themselves because they felt it was the mark of a tough guy. Others have been so lost in an addiction or so codependent that a respectful self-caring life was not possible.
As we regain our sanity, we find balance in the basics. Self-love allows us to be responsible for our care, and it puts us in a stronger position to help others, to be creative, and to assert our right to recovery.
Today, I will look after the essentials of my personal care and my family's care before I take on other things.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Desire and longing are the whips of God. --Anna Wickham
Our dreams and desires inspire us to reach beyond our present stopping-place. That which we can achieve will draw our attention, and with certainty, a partner is on hand to help us chart the steps for realizing the goal.
Before our introduction to the Twelve Steps, we experienced desires and set many goals. Some we attained. What we often lacked was confidence, and then our commitment wavered. The program is helping us realize that all pure desires are attainable when we invite the program's structure into our daily planning.
Our lives are purposeful. Each of us is fulfilling a necessary role. The longings that tug at us, longings that bring no harm to others, or ourselves push us to realize our full potential.
Courage and strength, ability and resourcefulness are never lacking when we follow the guidance within and trust in its direction. All the wisdom necessary for succeeding at any task, completing any goal, charting any desire, is as close as our attention is to God.
I will pay heed to my desires today. I will pray for the wisdom to fulfill them. All doors will open and my steps will be guided, when the desire is spiritually sound.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
New Relationship Behaviors
We talk much about new relationship behaviors in recovery: allowing others to be themselves without over reacting and taking it personally, and owning our power to take care of ourselves. We talk about letting go of our need to control, focusing on self-responsibility, and not setting ourselves up to be victims by focusing on the other person while neglecting ourselves. We talk about having and setting healthy boundaries, talking directly, and taking responsibility for what we want and need.
While these behaviors certainly help us deal with addicted people, these are not behaviors intended only for use in what we call "dysfunctional relationships."
These behaviors are our new relationship behaviors. They help us in stressful relationships. They can help us get through times of stress in healthy relationships.
The recovery behaviors we are learning are tools - healthy relationship skills - that help us improve the quality of all our relationships.
Recovery means self-care - learning to take care of ourselves and love ourselves - with people. The healthier we become, the healthier our relationships will become. And we'll never outgrow our need for healthy behaviors.
Today, I will remember to apply my recovery behaviors in all my relationships - with friends and co-workers, as well as in any special love relationship. I will work hard at taking care of myself in the troublesome relationships, figuring out which skill might best apply. I will also consider ways that my healthy relationships might benefit from my new relationship skills.
Today I continue to find people who are positive, healthy and nurturing. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey To The Heart
Don’t Hurry
Don’t worry and fuss about what you’re going to do tomorrow, or how tomorrow’s answers will come. The way to get through a task, a day, a life is to stay in the present moment.
Racing, pushing, trying to force things forward doesn’t work. Not anymore. Hurrying will not speed up the process, or the journey. In fact, if you race ahead of yourself, you may find you need to go back, return to the parts you skipped over, and go through it again fully present.
Yes, there are times we need to press on, times we need tp push a bit more. But hurrying won’t speed up the process. It will just keep us tense, out of step. To speed up the process, we need to fully immerse ourselves in the moment and then focus our energy, our presence, our emotions, our thoughts, and our heart.
Stay in the present moment. Listen to your heart right now. Be gentle and loving with yourself right now. Be open to the guidance around you right now, guidance that will make the present moment come alive.
If you stay in your heart, stay with yourself, stay in the present, tomorrow’s answers will come just as today’s did– naturally, gently, and on time.
*****
more language of letting go
Refresh yourself
There's a "refresh" button you can click on the computer when you're on line. It makes the computer operate more efficiently.
Sometimes we get a little sluggush,too. We've been pushing too hard. Mulling the same thoughts over and over. Doing the same things over and over. Sometimes we need a change of scenery. Sometimes we need to refresh our thoughts with prayer, meditation, a few words from a friend, or spending some time with a good book.
Maybe it's our bodies that need refreshing. We need a cold beverage, a brisk walk, a nap, or a hot shower.
Maybe we need a bigger refreshment: a weekend at a spa, a vacation. Even if our budget is low, we can pitch a tent in a park and take in the refreshing beauty of the world around us.
Look around. The world abounds with refreshments. The next time you get bogged down, stop pushing so hard. Do what you need to do to become efficient and operate with ease.
Refresh yourself.
God, help me understand the power of taking the time to refresh myself. Then help me stop thinking about it and actually do it.
*****
Gifts from the Universe by Madisyn Taylor
Our families help us see where we have come from so that we may more clearly decide where we’d like to go.
Families can contain a fascinating grouping of personalities. Despite the potential for so many to have similar traits, there are many different ways to express them. As people marry into families and have children, even more personalities enter the picture. There may be some people that we would not choose to be related to, but that’s what friends are for.
If we trust in a universe that has a higher purpose for everything, then we must believe that family members are in our lives for a good reason. These reasons may be easy to see and appreciate with some, but others may offer us a challenge. With those, we can look for something we can learn or perhaps teach. In the modern world where everyone seeks to be individuals, many move far away from their families in an attempt to escape them. But when we’ve successfully built a world around us that requires no one’s help, our families are the people who are still attached to us. We can still choose whether or not to honor the family ties, and how to treat each other, but the fact remains that we are energetically tied to our families.
Our families help us see where we have come from so that we may more clearly decide where we’d like to go. If we can learn to accept our families for who they are, then we go out into the world armed with the ability to deal with anyone. Some families are better than others at preparing us for the world. What we learn from our families, even if they are simply blank spots on our family trees, becomes the basis of our identities as individuals. Rather than denying our connections, we can choose to accept their presence in our lives. Acceptance does not mean we have to like them; we simply acknowledge that we are connected to them and honor that connection for like it or not, there is a reason. When we can embrace all that they bring into our experience, we may be grateful for all we have learned from them and have to learn, while we experience everything that comes with family fully and completely. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
In a letter to a friend, AA co-founder Bill W. wrote, “I don’t think happiness or unhappiness is the point. How do we meet the problems we face? How do we best learn from them and transmit what we have learned to others, if they would receive the knowledge? In my view, we of this owrld are pupils in a great school of life. It is intended that we try to grow, and that we try to help our fellow travelers to grow in the kind of love that makes no demands…When pain comes, we are expected to learn from it willingly, and help others to learn. When happiness comes, we accept it as a gift, and thank God for it.” Can I accept both pain and happiness willingly?
Today I Pray
God, please help me remember that everything that happens to me has its worth, including the misery of addiction. May I believe that even my dependency was part of God’s Grand Scheme to bring me to Him.
Today I Will Remember
All that I am is all that has happened to me.
******************************
One More Day
Fight one more round. When your feet are so tired you have to shuffle back to the center of the ring, fight one more round.
– James J. Corbett
One of the problems we most frequently hear about when a person is ill, whether it be mentally or physically, is exhaustion. We tell our doctors, our friends, anyone who will lend a willing ear, “I’m just so very tired.”
To live in the fullest sense of the word, we have to, first of all, take care of ourselves. If what we feel is physical exhaustion, then we must allow ourselves the needed rest. We don’t have to take on additional projects or commitments to prove ourselves. If, however, our tiredness has an emotional base, we may have to push ourselves — for just one more hour, for just one more day — trusting that the energy will come.
I will take care of myself this day. I am getting stronger, emotionally and spiritually.
************************************************** *******************
Food For Thought
God Is Here
The Power, which restores us to sanity, is not something remote and abstract, which we must search for by reading books and performing great feats. Our Higher Power is with us constantly and is involved in the minute details of every day. We do not have to wait and work to become acceptable to God. He accepts us now, just as we are.
What gets in the way of our awareness of God is self. If we are narrowly focused on the concerns of ego and self-will, we ignore the presence of a Higher Power. Then we become weak and confused in our aloneness.
To be aware of the presence of God in our lives every day, all we need is the willingness to be open to Him. We find that He is indeed “closer than breathing and nearer than hands and feet.” What we may have spent years searching for or denying turns out to be the ground of our existence and the Power that sustains us every minute.
Increase my awareness of You, I pray.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
AGING
“We turn, not older with years,
but newer every day.”
Emily Dickinson
Until I found Program, I used to think that being young was good and that being old was undignified. But working the 12 Steps helped me find the natural wisdom that comes from living over time without practicing addiction.
Now that I’m middle-aged, I feel a power, wisdom and dignity I've never felt before. Youth was good. This is good, too. For me, in fact, it’s better. I know myself at last. I have so many more resources inside me. I am grateful to be in my middle years.
As I get older, I seem to be getting more innocent. I no longer need to fit in, please others, or do things just because everyone else is doing them.
Somehow this has cleared my vision and it is easier for me to see and appreciate things the way they really are.
In the end, it is easier every day to see myself for who I really am and to accept and love myself.
One day at a time...
I am willing to be innocent and new; to go wherever my Higher Power leads me next.
~ Juno V.
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Live and let live is the rule. If you both show a willingness to remedy your own defects, there will be little need to criticize each other. - Pg. 118 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Vengeance sometimes seems the only way to get back at those who've hurt us. But we've found the best vengeance is living well, practicing our principles, and letting our Higher Power take care of the offenders.
May I recognize and internalize that vengeance is an attribute of addiction, not recovery.
Joy
Today I will embrace the experience of joy. The real purpose of life isn't to grab and get, to preen and try to out do the next guy. The real purpose of life is to deepen my ability to experience joy. Joy is the gift. Joy is the accomplishment. Joy is what fills me up. When I am able to feel joy, I don't need to chase around trying to get the world to admire and envy me on the outside because I feel empty on the inside. When I feel joy, I am happy in my own life because I understand that it is the only one that is actually mine to live, the only one through which I can connect with spirit.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Whatever vexes you currently, imagine for a moment what could make it worse. What can make it worse than that? Again. Imagine it, feel it, and come back to now. If you can make it worse, then you can make it better. Remember this: you are not helpless before your feelings.
I am stronger at what I'm doing, than my feelings are at what they're doing.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I continue to find people who are positive, healthy and nurturing.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Turn my stumbling blocks to stepping stones. - Jerry Jeff Walker - 'Getting By'
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 17, 2018 10:08:18 GMT -5
September 18
Daily Reflections
LOVED BACK TO RECOVERY
Our whole treasured philosophy of self-sufficiency had
to be cast aside. This had not been done with old-fashioned
willpower; it was instead a matter of developing the
willingness to accept these new facts of living. We neither
ran nor fought. But accept we did. And then we were free.
BEST OF THE GRAPEVINE, Vol. I, p. 198
I can be free of my old enslaving self. After a while I
recognize, and believe in, the good within myself. I see
that I have been loved back to recovery by my Higher Power,
who envelops me. My Higher Power becomes that source of
love and strength that is performing a continuing miracle
in me. I am sober . . . . and I am grateful.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Step Two is: "Came to believe that a Power greater
than ourselves could restore us to sanity." Step Three
is: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives
over to the care of God as we understood Him." Step
Eleven is: "Sought through prayer and meditation to
improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood
Him, praying only for the knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out." The fundamental basis
of A.A. is the belief in a Power greater than ourselves.
Let us not water this down. We cannot get the program
without this venture of belief. Have I made the venture of
belief in a Power greater than my own?
Meditation For The Day
"He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High,
shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty." Dwell for
a moment each day in a secret place, the place of
communion with God, apart from the world, and thence
receive strength to face the world. Material things cannot
intrude upon this secret place, they cannot ever find it,
because it is outside the realm of material things. When
you abide in this secret place, you are under the shadow
of the Almighty. God is close to you in this quiet place
of communion. Each day, dwell for a while in this secret
place.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may renew my strength in quietness.
I pray that I may find rest in quiet communion with God.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Inward Reality, p.260
It is being constantly revealed, as mankind studies the material
world, that its outward appearance is not inward reality at all. The
prosaic steel girder is a mass of electrons whirling around each other
at incredible speed, and these tiny bodies are governed by precise
laws. Science tells us so. We have no reason to doubt it.
When, however, the perfectly logic assumption is suggested that,
infinitely beyond the material world as we see it, there is an all
powerful, guiding, creative Intelligence, our perverse streak comes to
the surface and we set out to convince ourselves that this isn't so.
Were our contention true, it would follow that life originated out of
nothing, means nothing, and proceeds nowhere.
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The role of humor
Attitudes
There's a lot of humor among recovery groups, which probably came out
of the bizarre drinking stories told by speakers. It's also a reflection of
our real personalities.
The right kind of humor helps us achieve balance and not take ourselves
too seriously. Meetings can be terribly suffocating when they have
neither lightness or gaiety.
There is also a wrong kind of humor that should be avoided. It's very
easy to let joking and good-natured ribbing take the place of the honest
discussions all of us need. It's too easy in AA for a member to become
known and liked as a charming jokester, even though he or she may be
quietly feeling lots of inner pain. People are often surprised when such
a person runs into trouble, because they had accepted the humorous
surface personality without knowing the real person. In such a case,
humor can send the wrong message.
Most of the time, however, humor helps keep us on the right track.
Let's keep it in our picture, but also in the proper focus.
I'll not be afraid to laugh at myself or about myself today. Perhaps
my right-spirited laughter also reflects the laughter of God.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
We feel that the elimination of our drinking is but a beginning.---Alcoholics Anonymous
Giving up alcohol or other drugs is just the start. Even if we give up
chemicals, can we be happy if we have our old life back in every other way?
We have to do more. We have to see how our illness has changed us.
To do this, we turn to the Steps. Our program teaches us to become
new persons. We will change. And the changes will make us happy. That’s
the best part of recovery---change.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, make me open to changes that will
heal me. Help see I’m not cured just because I stopped drinking or using drugs.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll chose one thing about myself I want to change.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
The future is made of the same stuff as the present. --Simone Weil
The moment is eternal. It is unending. When we move with the moment,
we experience all that life can offer. Being fully awake to right now,
guarantees rapture even when there's pain, because we know we are
evolving, and we thrill with the knowledge. We are one with all that's
going on around us. Our existence is purposeful and part of the whole
of creation, and we can sense our purpose.
Nothing is--but now. And when we dwell on what was, or what may be,
we are cut off from life--essentially dead. The only reality is the present,
and it's only in the present that we are invited to make our special
contribution to life; perhaps at this moment our special contribution is to
reach out to another person, an act that will change two lives, ours and hers.
We must cling to the present, or we'll miss its invitation to grow, to help a
friend perhaps, to be part of the only reality there is. The present holds all
we need and all we'll ever need to fulfill our lives. It provides every opportunity
for our happiness--the only happiness there is.
Abstinence offers me the gift of the present. I will cherish it, be grateful, and relish it.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
If the family cooperates, dad will soon see that he is suffering from a distortion of values. He will perceive that his spiritual growth is lopsided, that for an average man like himself, a spiritual life which does not include his family obligations may not be so perfect after all. If the family will appreciated that dad’s current behavior is but a phase of his development, all will be well. In the midst of an understanding and sympathetic family, these vagaries of dad’s spiritual infancy will quickly disappear.
p. 129
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Today, I reside among the living, no better, no worse than any of God's other children. Today I look in the mirror when putting on my make up and smile, rather than shy away from looking myself in the eye. Today I fit in my skin. I am at peace with myself and the world around me.
p. 318
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Another great dividend we may expect from confiding our defects to another human being is humility--a word often misunderstood. To those who have made progress in A.A., it amounts to a clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be. Therefore, our first practical move toward humility must consist of recognizing our deficiencies. No defect can be corrected unless we clearly see what it is. But we shall have to do more than see. The objective look at ourselves we achieved in Step Four was, after all, only a look. All of us saw, for example, that we lacked honesty and tolerance, that we were beset at times by attacks of self-pity or delusions of personal grandeur. But while this was a humiliating experience, it didn't necessarily mean that we had yet acquired much actual humility. Though now recognized, our defects were still there. Something had to be done about them. And we soon found that we could not wish or will them away by ourselves.
p. 58
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If you don't like what you're getting, change what you're doing.
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
Love grows best when watered daily with kind words.
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
--Mark Twain
"Peace is not something you wish for; it's something you make,
something you do, something you are, something you give away."
--Robert Fulghum
"At the moment we are trying to put our lives in order. But this is not
an end in itself. Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum
service to God and the people about us."
--c. 1976, Alcoholics Anonymous, page 77
"My life's purpose is much clearer when I just work to help, not to
possess."
--c. 1990, Daily Reflections, page 89
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
OPEN-MINDEDNESS
"A fanatic is one who can't
change his mind and won't
change the subject."
-- Winston Churchill
In my addiction I had a closed mind because I was afraid to be seen to
be wrong. I had to be right, I had to be in control, and I had to be
perfect. To say "I don't know the answer" would make me weak,
vulnerable and human! So I developed a closed mind: my way, my
thoughts, my ideas, my life, my God. And I was in pain.
Then I had a moment of clarity. I heard that I was sick. I heard that if
I really wanted help, I could receive it. I put away the alcohol and I
became vulnerable. Slowly I faced the confusion of life and I
discovered the human race. I was no longer alone.
Today the spiritual life is more about living with the questions than
providing the answers.
I pray that I may continue to find Truth in variety.
************************************************** *********
"Love does no harm to its neighbor."
Romans 13:10
Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong;
for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon
die away. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy
safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the
desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and
he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the
LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in
their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from
anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil. For evil
men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the
land.
Psalm 37:1-9
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of
God. Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake:
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 5:9-10
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other,
even as God also in Christ forgave you.
Ephesians 4:32
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Great power comes from being able to appreciate your own goodness and
anticipate goodness in others. Lord, help me to focus on that which will bring
me peace and lift my spirit.
Worry about nothing, pray for everything, and thank God for His answers.
Lord, I ask You to handle my problems with me and care for my needs.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Honest Relationships
"One of the most profound changes in our lives is in the realm of personal relationships."
Basic Text pg. 55
Recovery gives many of us relationships that are closer and more intimate than any we've had before. As time passes, we find ourselves gravitating toward those who eventually become our friends, our sponsor and our partners in life. Shared laughter, tears, and struggles bring shared respect and lasting empathy.
What, then, do we do when we find we don't agree with our friends on everything? We may discover that we don't share the same taste in music as our dearest friend, or that we don't agree with our spouse about how the furniture should be arranged, or even find ourselves voting differently than our sponsor at a service committee meeting. Does conflict mean that the friendship, the marriage, or the sponsorship is over? No!
These types of conflict are not only to be expected in any long-lasting relationship but are actually an indication that both people are emotionally healthy and honest individuals. In any lasting relationship where both people agree on absolutely everything, chances are that only one person is doing the thinking. If we sacrifice our honesty and integrity to avoid conflicts or disagreements, we give away the best of what we bring to our relationships. We experience the measure of partnership with another human being when we are fully honest.
Just for today: I will welcome the differences that make each one of us special. Today, I will work on being myself.
pg 272
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I will, I will accept myself
With hope and fear and wonder
And what I have joined together
Let no man put asunder.
--Dory Preven
There is a wonderful freedom in acceptance. When we accept ourselves, with all our imperfections, we can then begin to accept others just as they are. This is especially exciting when we apply this discovery to our own families. A family is like a bouquet of flowers arranged in a common vase. Each flower is different. One might be blue, one white, one a rose, one a chrysanthemum. But each adds to the beauty of the whole bouquet and enhances the vase that holds it.
It isn't important that we know why one flower is blue and one white. We don't have to understand how a rose becomes a rose to appreciate the arrangement. We just accept it for what it is. Acceptance of others does not mean agreement or approval. How boring if we only accepted those who reflected our own ideas and opinions! How dull to look upon a bouquet of exactly the same flowers.
Today, will I accept the differences between us as part of our beauty together?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Grace strikes us when we are in great pain and restlessness. It strikes us when we walk through the dark valley of a meaningless and empty life. --Paul Tillich
We are men who know the consequences of alcoholism, codependency, and addiction. We have walked dark valleys. We have felt meaningless and empty in our lives. Each of us has a story. The harder we worked to overcome those feelings by our individual efforts, the worse the feelings got. This program suggested we try something radically new --something we couldn't think up on our own.
Grace is the love and generosity of God, which comes through no effort of our own. Not until we felt defeated would we open ourselves to this gift of help from our Higher Power. Grace comes in many forms. It is in the hope we feel in the morning after a night of rest, and it's in the good feeling we get attending our meetings. Before this program, most of us were trying so hard to control our lives we couldn't notice any gifts that came from outside our efforts. These Twelve Steps train us for becoming receptive to the healing grace of God.
The grace of God surrounds me - even in difficult times. Returning to that message renews my strength.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The future is made of the same stuff as the present. --Simone Weil
The moment is eternal. It is unending. When we move with the moment, we experience all that life can offer. Being fully awake to right now, guarantees rapture even when there's pain, because we know we are evolving, and we thrill with the knowledge. We are one with all that's going on around us. Our existence is purposeful and part of the whole of creation, and we can sense our purpose.
Nothing is--but now. And when we dwell on what was, or what may be, we are cut off from life--essentially dead. The only reality is the present, and it's only in the present that we are invited to make our special contribution to life; perhaps at this moment our special contribution is to reach out to another person, an act that will change two lives, ours and hers.
We must cling to the present, or we'll miss its invitation to grow, to help a friend perhaps, to be part of the only reality there is. The present holds all we need and all we'll ever need to fulfill our lives. It provides every opportunity for our happiness--the only happiness there is.
Abstinence offers me the gift of the present. I will cherish it, be grateful, and relish it.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting the Good Stuff Happen
Before recovery, my relationships were lousy. I didn't do very well on my job. I was enmeshed in my dysfunctional family. But at least I knew what to expect! --Anonymous
I want the second half of my life to be as good as the first half was miserable. Sometimes, I'm afraid it won't be. Sometimes, I'm frightened it might be.
The good stuff can scare us. Change, even good change, can be frightening. In some ways, good changes can be more frightening than the hard times.
The past, particularly before recovery, may have become comfortably familiar. We knew what to expect in our relationships. They were predictable. They were repeats of the same pattern - the same behaviors, the same pain, over and over again. They may not have been what we wanted, but we knew what was going to happen.
This is not so when we change patterns and begins recovering.
We may have been fairly good at predicting events in most areas of our life. Relationships would be painful. We'd be deprived.
Each year would be almost a repeat of the last. Sometimes it got a little worse, sometimes a little better, but the change wasn't drastic. Not until the moment when we began recovery.
Then things changed. And the further we progress in this miraculous program, the more we and or circumstances change. We begin to explore uncharted territory.
Things get good. They do get better all the time. We begin to become successful in love, in work, in life. One day at a time, the good stuff begins to happen and the misery dissipates.
We no longer want to be a victim of life. We've learned to avoid unnecessary crisis and trauma.
Life gets good.
"How do I handle the good stuff?" asked one woman. It's harder and more foreign than the pain and tragedy."
"The same way we handled the difficult and the painful experiences," I replied. "One day at a time."
Today, God, help me let go of my need to be in pain and crisis. Help me move as swiftly as possible through sad feelings and problems. Help me find my base and balance in peace, joy, and gratitude. Help me work as hard at accepting what's good, as I have worked in the past at accepting the painful and the difficult.
If something isn't working for me today, I am willing to let go of the struggle. I trust that God has something better in store for me. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey To The Heart
Open Up to New Energy
As you change, what works for you may change.
The purpose of the journey is to open up. But with it comes the responsibility of watching how we feel, how our bodies feel in certain circumstances. With it comes the responsibility of knowing that certain things that used to work for us, certain things we used to be able to handle, may not work as well any longer.
As we change, we will want and need the energy around us to change,too. We’ll want it to feel better, energize us, be good for us. At first we may say, This never bothered me before. I don’t know why I’m so sensitive now. Then we may wait for our bodies and lives to return to normal, to return to how they used to be.
You are becoming more sensitive, more open than you’ve ever been. When you were closed, you didn’t feel as much, didn’t respond as much. Sometimes you weren’t aware of what you were feeling or how your body reacted. Now that you are more open, your body, mind, spirit, and soul will be far more effected by what you take in– whether it is food, drink, or the energy of a person or situation. You will feel more intensely. You may want different foods, different people, different places, different clothing, different activities. As your energy changes, you will likely want different energy around you.
Listen to your body and emotions when they tell you something no longer works for you. Let the old fall away. Listen to your inner guidance as your heart leads you to someplace new.
*****
more language of letting go
Rise to the occasion
"You should have seen me when I was younger. I was something else then."
"Just wait until I'm older and bigger. Then I'll show you what I can do."
If all we do is remember the strength of our past, then we're denying ourselves the wisdom and abilities we carry with us in the present. And we deny the lessons that age teaches us about slowing down, being still, and letting things be the way they are. If we're waiting for the future to be happy, we're robbing ourselves of the vitality and joy in our lives right now.
Stop reminiscing about the past and anticipating the joys of the future-- that time when you become all powerful, bigger, and better than you are now.
You're as good as you need to be today. Let yourself be who you are, then enjoy being exactly that.
Rise to the occasion of today.
God, help me be the best me that I can be.
*****
A Dynamic Choice-Maker
Accepting Yourself by Madisyn Taylor
Sometimes we choose or do something that takes us in the opposite direction of the reality we want to create.
There is no such thing as a good person or a bad person. There are choices and actions that lead us in different directions, and it is through those choices and actions that we create our realities. Sometimes we choose or do something that takes us in the opposite direction of the reality we want to create for ourselves. When we do this, we feel bad—uneasy, unhappy, unsure. We might go so far as to label ourselves “bad” when a situation like this arises. Instead of labeling ourselves, though, we could simply acknowledge that we made a choice that lead us down a particular path, and then let it go, forgiving ourselves and preparing for our next opportunity to choose, and act, in ways that support our best intentions.
Many of us experienced childhoods in which the words good and bad were used as weapons to control us—you were good if you did what you were told and bad if you didn’t. This kind of discipline undermines a person’s ability to find their own moral center and to trust and be guided by their own inner self. If you were raised this way, you may find yourself feeling shockwaves of badness when you do something you were taught was wrong, even if now you don’t agree that it’s bad. Conversely, you may feel good when you do what you learned was right. Notice how this puts you in something of a straitjacket. An important part of our spiritual unfolding requires that we grow beyond what we learned and take responsibility for our own liberation in our own terms.
You are a human being with every right to be here, learning and exploring. To label yourself good or bad is to think too small. What you are is a decision-maker and every moment provides you the opportunity to move in the direction of your higher self or in the direction of stagnation or degradation. In the end, only you know the difference. If you find yourself going into self-judgment, try to stop yourself as soon as you can and come back to center. Know that you are not good or bad, you are simply you. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
In every story we hear from others in The Program, pain has been the price of admission into a new life. But our admission price purchased far more than we expected. It led us to a degree of humility, which we soon discovered to be a healer of pain. And, in time, we began to fear pain less — and desire humility more than ever. Am I learning to “sit loosely in the saddle” — making the most of what comes and the least of what goes?
Today I Pray
If God’s plan for us is spiritual growth, a closer alliance with His principles of what is good and what is true, then may I believe that all my experiences have added up to a new and improved me. May I not fear the lessons of pain. May I know, that I must continue to grow through pain, as well as joy.
Today I Will Remember
I hurt; therefore, I am.
******************************
One More Day
Our souls are hungry for meaning, for the sense that we have figured out how to live so that our lives matter, so that the world [will] be at least a little bit different for our having passed through.
– Harold Kushner
Even when we are no longer well, many of us continue to hunger for learning. We reach out to connect with other people and with book learning.
We continue to search on a deeper level as well. Not surprisingly, spirituality often takes a back seat, for a while, to the rigors of getting used to a changed medical condition. Ultimately, our souls cry out for growth as our minds do, and we turn to our Higher Power for comfort and understanding.
My diminished health does not affect my drive for meaning and for learning. I want and need to learn.
************************************************** *******************
Food For Thought
Bad Days
There are some days when we wake up in the morning knowing with a sixth sense that the day is going to be a hard one. These are the days when it is difficult to get out of bed, when we would prefer not to face whatever awaits us. There is no way around these days; we must get through them the best way we can.
Our most useful tool for coping with a bad day is abstinence. Nothing is impossible when we are abstaining from compulsive overeating. Often our problem lies not in the external events of the day but in recognizing a part of ourselves that has been hidden and repressed. We resist facing honestly what our Higher Power is revealing to us about our inner life.
When we are determined not to escape into food, we will come out of a bad day stronger than we were before. We reinforce our new way of living, which is to turn difficult situations over to our Higher Power and then act as He guides us, step by step.
May I be closer to You during the bad days.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
OVERWHELMED
“Fear is a sign –
usually a sign that I’m doing something right.”
Erica Jong
When I first came into the Twelve Step program, I felt overwhelmed. Life overwhelmed me. My eating disorders overwhelmed me. My inner-pain overwhelmed me. Before I walked into my first meeting, I felt very alone.
My Higher Power has been good to me. When I entered my first meeting, I learned I was not alone. As I began to work the Twelve Steps, I learned that, while I had a lot of healing and learning to do, I would not be doing it alone. I have many friends who help me, but most of all, I have a relationship with my Higher Power that assures me constantly that I am loved.
Today, I don't often feel overwhelmed. When I do, I turn to my Higher Power and my friends, all of whom help me to focus on doing the best thing for my mental, emotional and physical health.
One day at a time...
I will remember
that even when I feel alone,
I have the love and help of my Higher Power.
~ Rhonda H.
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Many times we go to meetings to listen to what happens to people who don't go to meetings. When they ask for a topic at today's meeting, suggest 'What Happens to People Who Don't go to Meetings.'
One meeting a day can not possibly take as much time as my former bars, parties, connections, and the energy I put into using and drinking. Help me see that any complaints about the 'frequency' is unfounded.
Love What You Have
Today I will love what I have rather than always wanting something to be different before I allow myself to be happy. There is so much in my life right now. When I sit still and allow the life I already have to surround me, there is a feeling of fullness that begins to expand inside of me. When I spend all my time chasing what I think I need in order to be happy, I am never still enough to actually experience this feeling of contentment. Contentment is available to me all the time if I am willing to slow down and allow it to come into me. My happiness has more to do with loving what I already have than regretting or chasing after what I don't have.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Whether you pray, petition, plead, protest, prod, or praise your Spiritual Source, whether you sing songs of gratitude or whisper words of doubt, this is prayer.
Got prayer?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
We take the steps, but it's funny where the steps take us.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
If something isn't working for me today, I am willing to let go of the struggle.
I trust that God has something better in store for me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Ninety per cent of what I do on first contact with a new drunk is to sthingy feed him Traditions. 'Cos if you get a guy in your car and you're on your way to a meeting and you say: 'Look, you're going to have to take a searching and fearless moral inventory.' you'd better not hit a red light, 'cos they're gone. - Doug D.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 18, 2018 16:47:16 GMT -5
September 19
Daily Reflections
ACCEPTANCE
We admitted we couldn't lick alcohol with our own
remaining resources, and so we accepted the further
fact that dependence upon a Higher Power
(if only our A.A. group) could do this hitherto
impossible job. The moment we were able to accept
these facts fully, our release from the alcohol
compulsion had begun.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 109
Freedom came to me only with my acceptance that I
could turn my will and my life over to the care of
my Higher Power, whom I call God. Serenity seeped
into the chaos of my life when I accepted that what
I was going through was life, and that God would
help me through my difficulties--and much more, as
well. Since then He has helped me through all of my
difficulties! When I accept situations as they are,
not as I wish them to be, then I can begin to grow
and have serenity and peace of mind.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Let us continue with Steps Two, Three, and Eleven.
We must turn to a Higher Power for help, because we
are helpless ourselves. When we put our drink problem
in God's hands and leave it there, we have made the
most important decision of our lives. From then on,
we trust God for the strength to keep sober. This
takes us off the center of the universe and allows
us to transfer our problems to a Power outside
ourselves. By prayer and meditation, we seek to
improve our conscious contract with God. We try to
live each day the way we believe God wants us
to live. Am I trusting God for the strength to stay sober?
Meditation For The Day
"These things have I spoken unto you, that your joy
may be full." Even a partial realization of the
spiritual life brings much joy. You feel at home in
the world when you are in touch with the Divine
Spirit of the universe. Spiritual experience brings
a definite satisfaction. Search for the real meaning
of life by following spiritual laws. God wants you to
have spiritual success and He intends that you have it.
If you live your life as much as possible according to
spiritual laws, you can expect your share of joy and
peace, satisfaction and success.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I will find happiness in doing the right
thing. I pray that I will find satisfaction in obeying
spiritual laws.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
"Fearless and Searching", p.261
My self-analysis has frequently been faulty. Sometimes I've failed
to share my defects with the right people; at other times, I've
confessed their defects, rather than my own; and still other times,
my confession of defects has been more in the nature of loud
complaints about my circumstances and my problems.
********************************
When A.A. suggests a fearless moral inventory, it must seem to
every newcomer that more is being asked of him than he can do.
Every time he tries to look within himself, Pride says, "You need not
pass this way," and Fear says, "You dare not look!"
But pride and fear of this sort turn out to be bogymen, nothing
else. Once we have a complete willingness to take inventory, and
exert ourselves to do the job thoroughly, a wonderful light falls
upon this foggy scene. As we persist, a brand-new kind of
confidence is born, and the sense of relief at finally facing
ourselves is indescribable.
1. Grapevine, June 1958
2. 12 & 12, pp.49-50
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Keep the common problem in view
Maintaining
It there's been one major change in AA, one old-timer observed,
it's probably in group discussions. The focus today is far more on
overcoming personal problems than in staying away form the first drink.
"The early AA members were continuously concerned about the dangers
of drinking," he said. "Members today are more concerned about their
feelings and personal issues, such as relationships."
This change has probably been an improvement, but it carries the risk
that members will forget why they needed the program in the first place.
For alcoholics, it is dangerous to let the problem with alcohol slide out of
view. It is important to keep in mind at all times the life-or-death nature
of our drinking problem. Even if we are not totally successful in dealing
with our feelings or establishing harmonious relationships, it's always
necessary to stay sober. Disaster is in that first drink, and let's keep
that constantly in view.
No matter how long I've been sober, I'll remind myself several times
this day that I'm an alcoholic. I'll also remember that it's only sobriety
that enables me to deal with my other problems.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when
we put ourselves in God’s hands were better than anything we could
have planned.---Alcoholics Anonymous
We can’t control the present by looking into the future. We can only
look back at the past. The past can teach us how to get more out of
the present. But the past is to be learned from, not to be judged.
As we look back, we see the troubles caused by addiction. But we
also see recovery. We see how our lives are better. We see our
Higher Power’s work in our lives. If we honestly look at our past, we learn.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me learn from the past.
With Your help, I’ll stop judging my past, just as I wouldn’t judge
those who have gone before me.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll remember my life before I got sober.
Do I still hang on to attitudes or behaviors that might make me start to
use alcohol and other drugs again?
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
...concern should drive us into action and not into depression. --Karen Horney
The role of victim is all too familiar to many of us. Life did us injustices
--we thought. And we passively waited for circumstances to change.
With the bottle we waited, or maybe the little white pills. Nothing was
our fault. That we were willing participants to victimization is an awareness
not easily accepted, but true nonetheless.
Victims no more, we are actors, now. And since committing ourselves to
this program, we have readily available a willing and very able director
for our role in life. Every event invites an action, and we have opted for
the responsible life.
Depression may be on the fringes of our consciousness today. But it need
not become our state of mind. The antidote is and always will be action,
responsible action. Every concern, every experience wants our attention,
our active attention.
Today stretches before me, an unknown quantity. Concerns will crowd upon
me, but guidance regarding the best action to take is always available to me.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
The opposite may happen should the family condemn and criticize. Dad may feel that for years his drinking has placed him on the wrong side of every argument, but that now he has become a superior person with God on his side. If the family persists in criticism, this fallacy may take a still greater hold on father. Instead of treating the family as he should, he may retreat further into himself and feel he has spiritual justification for so doing.
p. 129
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Growing up in A.A., I have been blessed with children who have never seen their mother drunk. I have a husband who loves me simply because I am, and I have gained the respect of my family. What more could a broken-down drunk ask for? Lord knows it is more than I ever thought possible, and ever so much more than I deserved. All because I am willing to believe A.A. just might work for me too.
p. 318
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
More realism and therefore more honesty about ourselves are the great gains we make under the influence of Step Five. As we took inventory, we began to suspect how much trouble self-delusion had been causing us. This had brought a disturbing reflection. If all our lives we had more or less fooled ourselves, how could we now be so sure that we weren't still self-deceived? How could we be certain that we had made a true catalog of our defects and had really admitted them, even to ourselves? Because we were still bothered by fear, self-pity, and hurt feelings, it was probable we couldn't appraise ourselves fairly at all. Too much guilt and remorse might cause us to dramatize and exaggerate our shortcomings. Or anger and hurt pride might be the smoke screen under which we were hiding some of our defects while we blamed others for them. Possibly, too, we were still handicapped by many liabilities, great and small, we never knew we had.
pp. 58-59
************************************************** *********
If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of
tomorrow, you have no today for which you can be thankful.
--Anonymous
Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you
hold well.
--Josh Billings
"I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full.
And scratch where it itches."
--Alice Roosevelt Longworth
In each of our lives, for whatever reason, there are times that we are
faced with things that just don't make sense to us. And the more we
struggle to understand our hardships, the less any of it makes sense.
I have found that in every challenge and obstacle that we are faced
with there *can* be good that can come from it! While it's almost
never easy to identify, I assure you that it is there lying dormant just
waiting for us to release it! I urge everyone to spend your days looking
for positives in your life.
--Josh Hinds from The Inspiration a Day! April 8, 1998
Whate'er we leave to God, God does and blesses us.
--Henry David Thoreau
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SUICIDE
"Often the test of courage is not
to die but to live."
-- Conte Vittorio Alfieri
There are many ways of committing suicide. The obvious way is to
take your life -- the ultimate escape. One can reach that point in life
when there seems no hope, no purpose in living and death is attractive.
Many alcoholics and addicts reach this point of despair.
However, there is a more subtle way of "suicide", which is to kill
yourself slowly -- by a sick behavior and a negative attitude. I was
"dying" in a lifestyle that revolved around alcohol. All I wanted to do
was drink -- I didn't want to go anywhere, be with anyone or enjoy the
thousand and one pleasures that life offers. I was dying in my life. I
was becoming a "walking zombie". I was committing suicide by
degrees!
Today I can see this and I am glad I had the courage to live. My act of
courage began with my "no" to alcohol.
Let me continue to live in my life.
************************************************** *********
The LORD is my light and my salvation-- whom shall I fear? The
LORD is the stronghold of my life-- of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 27:1
A little while, and the wicked will be no more; though you look for
them, they will not be found. But the meek will inherit the land and
enjoy great peace. The wicked plot against the righteous and gnash
their teeth at them; but the Lord laughs at the wicked, for he knows
their day is coming.
Psalm 37:10-13
"Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in
your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope
is in you all day long."
Psalm 25:4-5
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his
friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer
call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's
business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I
learned from my Father I have made known to you."
John 15:13-15
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Are you too busy wishing away your day to get what you really want?
Lord, help me set goals and find the means to achieve what is important to me.
God has given each of us many talents and abilities. To use them reflects
our commitment to Him. Lord, help me find new ways to use the talents that
You've given me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Fellowship
"In NA, our joys are multiplied by sharing good days; our sorrows are lessened by sharing the bad. For the first time in our lives, we don't have to experience anything alone."
IP No.16, "For the Newcomer"
When we practice using the steps and the other tools of our program to work through our hardships, we become able to take pleasure in the joys of living clean. But our joys pass all too quickly if we don't share them with others, while hardships borne alone may be long in passing. In the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous, we often multiply our joys and divide our burdens by sharing them with one another.
We addicts experience pleasures in recovery that, sometimes, only another addict can appreciate. Fellow members understand when we tell them of the pride we take today in fulfilling commitments, the warmth we feel in mending damaged relationships, the relief we experience in not having to use drugs to make it through the day. When we share these experiences with recovering addicts and they respond with similar stories, our joy is multiplied. The same principle applies to the challenges we encounter as recovering addicts. By sharing our challenges and allowing other NA members to share their strength with us, our load is lightened.
The fellowship we have in Narcotics Anonymous is precious. Sharing together, we enhance the joys and diminish the burdens of life in recovery.
Just for today: I will share my joys and my burdens with other recovering addicts. I will also share in theirs. I am grateful for the strong bonds of fellowship in Narcotics Anonymous.
pg. 273
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Young man, the secret of my success is that at an early age I discovered I was not God. --Oliver Wendell Holmes
Sometimes, in our families, we try to get parents or brothers or sisters to treat us the way we want them to, to do things we want them to. When they're upset or angry with us, we try to get them to stop, rather than allow them to be angry.
But our feelings are ours alone, and we are responsible only for how we feel. Those around us are not the cause of our feelings. We are.
This knowledge is a big responsibility, because we know we cannot blame others for our bad moods. But it is a fact. And this fact is also a wonderful freedom for us, for it means that we also have the power to make ourselves happy, no matter what goes on around us.
How can I make myself happy today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Who's not sat tense before his own heart's curtain? --Rainer Maria Rilke
Meeting our Higher Power and ourselves is the universal spiritual process. Sitting before the curtain of our hearts may feel as awesome to us or as frightening as anything we will ever do. When we first admit to ourselves a deeper truth, we feel these overpowering tensions. For some of us, this is a necessary step, which leads to self-knowledge and inner peace. We feel unique, different, alone, and maybe even crazy. For the first time, we are listening to our inner truth rather than outside messages.
Let's think for a moment about today's tensions and strains. Are we really aware of their source? Perhaps they are created by the disturbing honesty of our hearts? We may find our spiritual growth in yielding to the truth. When we are cynical about spiritual experience or when we minimize the importance of our soft-spoken inner wisdom, we are avoiding the truth from our hearts. And we miss the possibility of becoming strong from within.
Today, I will live through the tension and fear of my honesty to reach the point of peace with myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...concern should drive us into action and not into depression. --Karen Horney
The role of victim is all too familiar to many of us. Life did us injustices--we thought. And we passively waited for circumstances to change. With the bottle we waited, or maybe the little white pills. Nothing was our fault. That we were willing participants to victimization is an awareness not easily accepted, but true nonetheless.
Victims no more, we are actors, now. And since committing ourselves to this program, we have readily available a willing and very able director for our role in life. Every event invites an action, and we have opted for the responsible life.
Depression may be on the fringes of our consciousness today. But it need not become our state of mind. The antidote is and always will be action, responsible action. Every concern, every experience wants our attention, our active attention.
Today stretches before me, an unknown quantity. Concerns will crowd upon me, but guidance regarding the best action to take is always available to me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Apologies
Sometimes, we act in a manner with which we are less than comfortable. That's human. That's why we have the words: "I'm sorry." They heal and bridge the gap. But we don't have to say, "I'm sorry" if we didn't do anything wrong. A sense of shame can keep us apologizing for everything we do, every word we say, for being alive and being who we are.
We don't have to apologize for taking care of ourselves, dealing with feelings, seeking boundaries, having fun, or getting healthy.
We never have to change our course, if it is in our best interest, but sometimes a general apology acknowledges other feelings and can be useful when the issues of a circumstance or relationship are not clear. We might say: "I'm sorry for the fuss we had. I'm sorry if what I needed to do to take care of myself hurt you; it was not intended that way."
Once we make an apology, we don't have to keep repeating it. If someone wants to keep on extricating an apology from us for the same incident, that is the person's issue, and we don't have to get hooked.
We can learn to take our apologies seriously and not hand them out when they're not valid. When we feel good about ourselves, we know when it's time to say we're sorry and when it's not.
Today, I will try to be clear and healthy in my apologies, taking responsibility for my actions and nobody else's. God, help me figure out what I need to apologize for and what is not my responsibility.
I grow and learn from everything that happens. Today I am keeping my eyes open and my head clear so that I don't have to make the same mistake twice. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Weather the Storm
Storms come. The lightning flashes. Thunder rolls. Sometimes the hail pounds so loudly and incessantly it becomes frightening. Sometimes storms do damage. But storms are not forever.
Just as nature plays out her storms, sometimes with violence, sometimes with gray days, sometimes with a gentle cleansing rain, we have storms in our lives, storms in our souls. Storms are part of life, part of growth, part of the journey.
Light a candle. Wrap up in warmth. Make yourself safe and secure. Then wait for the storm to pass, knowing it will.
Let peace return. Let security return. Let joy and meaning come back, the certain faith that you have purpose and your life is on track.
*****
more language of letting go
What do you expect?
The key to life and power is simple. It's knowing who we are. It's knowing what we think, what we feel, what we believe, what we know, and even what we sense. It's understanding where we've been, where we are, and where we want to go. That's often different from who we think we should be, from whom others want us to be, tell us to be, and sometimes even tell us we are.
--Melody Beattie, Stop Being Mean To Yourself
It's get to get hooked into other people's expectations of us. Sometimes, it's even easier to get hooked into what we think they expect of us.
One of the biggest traps is locking ourselves into a preconceived notion of ourselves. We can keep ourselves so busy living up to an image of ourselves that we forget who we really are. It's tough enough to break free of the expectations, spoken and unspoken, that others put on us. It's more insidious when we start telling ourselves to be what we think other people are expecting us to be-- whether they are or not.
Look in the mirror. If you see a person who has been confined with a limiting image that doesn't fit or feel right anymore, set yourself free.
God, help me let go of ego. Help me stop living up to self-imposed caricatures of who I think I'm supposed to be.
Activity: This week, do two things you want to do that you think other people wouldn't normally expect of you. Don't do anything that hurts yourself or maliciously causes pain to another. You might surprise yourself with how easy and fun it is to be you.
*****
Recognizing Our Own Abundance
Planting The Seeds Of Generosity
The most difficult time to be generous is when we ourselves are feeling poor. While some of us have experienced actually being in the red financially, there are those of us who would feel broke even if we had a million dollars in the bank. Either way, as the old adage goes, it is always in giving that we receive. Meaning that when we are living in a state of lack, the very gesture we may least want to give is the very act that could help us create the abundance that we seek. One way to practice generosity is to give energy where it is needed. Giving money to a cause or person in need is one way to give energy. Giving attention, love, or a smile to another person are other acts of giving that we can offer. After all, there are people all over the world that are hungry for love.
Sometimes when we practice generosity, we practice it conditionally. We might be expecting to “receive back” from the person to whom we gave. We might even become angry or resentful if that person doesn’t reciprocate. However, trust in the natural flow of energy, and you will find yourself practicing generosity with no strings attached. This is the purest form of giving. Remember that what you send out will always come back you. Selflessly help a friend in need without expecting them to return the same favor in the same way, and know that you, too, will receive that support from the universe when you need it. Besides, while giving conditionally creates stress (because we are waiting with an invisible balance sheet to receive our due), giving unconditionally creates and generates abundance. We give freely, because we trust that there is always an unlimited supply.
Being aware of how much we are always supported by the universe is one of the keys to abundance and generosity. Consciously remember the times you’ve received support from expected and unexpected sources. Remember anyone who has helped you when you’ve needed it most, and bless all situations that come into your life for the lessons and gifts they bring you. Remember that all things given and received emanate from generosity. Giving is an act of gratitude. Plant the seeds of generosity through your acts of giving, and you will grow the fruits of abundance for yourself and those around you.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
It’s still not exactly a “piece of cake” for me to accept today’s occasional pain and anxiety with any great degree of serenity, but I’m increasingly able to be thankful for a certain amount of pain. In The Program, we find the willingness to do this by going over the lessons learned from past sufferings — lessons which have led to the blessings we now enjoy. We can remember how the agonies of addiction — and the pain of rebellion and bruised pride — have often led us to God’s grace, and thus to new freedom. Have I thanked my Higher Power for the miracle of my life this day?
Today I Pray
When I was helpless, I asked God for help. When I was hopeless, I reached out for hope. When I was powerless over my addiction, I asked to share His power. Now I can honestly thank God that I was helpless, hopeless, and powerless, because I have seen a miracle.
Today I Will Remember
From powerless highs to a Higher Power.
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One More Day
Of a truth, men are mystically united; a mystic bond of brotherhood makes all men one.
Thomas Carlyle
At our parent’s knee we listened, enraptured, as we heard tales of how life used to be. We could hardly believe that they had lived soooo long. As we moved into our teens, perhaps our parents became pathetically inept in our eyes, not to regain their intelligence until we were older.
Now we see that our folks were able to learn from their mistakes and move forward — just as we move forward now. We have learned “what goes around comes around,” and history repeats itself. Our parents imparted their greatest knowledge to us, and lovingly shared with us their mistakes so we could benefit.
I will listen with respect to the ones I love. I learn from them.
************************************************** ******************
Food For Thought
Know Yourself
The OA program fosters self-knowledge on a practical, physical level as well as on the more abstract emotional and intellectual levels. We come to know what foods we can handle comfortably, how we can arrange our day so that we do not get exhausted, and which people we need to avoid if we are to maintain our serenity.
We had so little self-confidence when we were overeating that we were inclined to accept other people’s ideas of who we were and what we should do. By trying to be and do what others expected, we may have lost sight of our inner selves. The emptiness caused by not knowing and respecting ourselves led in turn to more overeating as we tried to fill the inner void with food.
Self-knowledge requires courage and honesty. It involves admitting our weaknesses and mistakes, rather than pretending to be perfect. As we come to know ourselves – our preferences, needs, and goals – we gain strength and integrity. The Power greater than ourselves gives us the insight to know who we are physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Thank You for self-knowledge.
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One Day At A Time
SERVICE
“We must give alms.
Charity wins souls and draws them to virtue.”
Angela Merici
An important lesson in life is that in order to get something we need or want, we first have to give some of it away. If we want friends, we have to be a friend. If we want to be loved, we have to love. If we want recovery, we have to help others recover.
Then we begin to “get it.” The tingling excitement of hope is aroused in us. We discover an inner-source of power to live.
Giving service is as important to our recovery as are abstinence and working the Steps. It includes everything from organizing materials at a face-to-face meeting to hosting meetings online. It’s sharing our problems and our solutions on the loops, as well as sponsoring. Recovery is incomplete until it is shared by giving service to the program or to individuals. It’s remarkable how service brings us closer together, allows us to make friends, helps to end our isolation and gives that feeling of self-worth and confidence that we so desperately need. Simply put, service is as much a lifesaver to us as it is to those we reach out and touch.
I want to be a giver to the program so it is always available to those who will come after me seeking their freedom from this dread disease.
One Day at a Time . . .
I strive to give love, support, comfort, cheer and encouragement,
knowing it will come back to me pressed down, shaken together and running over.
~ Dottie
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The greatest enemies of us alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration, and fear. Whenever men are gathered together in business there will be rivalries and, arising out of these, a certain amount of office politics. Sometimes we alcoholics have an idea that people are trying to pull us down. Ofen this is not so at all. But sometimes our drinking will be used politically. - Pg. 145 - To Employers
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Learning to be tolerant of others, a difficult task at best, does not mean that we have to agree with them! Tolerance disagrees agreeably, we think. If someone disagrees with us right now, we can agree to disagree.
Right now I ask for the serenity to agree to disagree because my discomfort for prolonged times could lead me to pick up that first fix, pill, or drink!
Actualizing the Gifts that are In Me
I will actualize that gifts that are in me today. I will be less preoccupied with who I'm not and more occupied with who I am. When I spend all of my time looking outside of me or wanting what others have, I forget that I have my own special gifts. God has placed gifts within me that I am meant to develop and share. My responsibility is to come to know what my gifts are, then to cultivate and strengthen them as I share them with the world.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
One of your greatest resources can be your pets. Animals are wonderful companions and better listeners. They give undivided and devoted attention--long past the time when others have exited. They do not judge and they love unconditionally.
I work toward becoming the person my dog thinks I am.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
It says: 'here are the steps we took,' not suggested, not understand.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I grow and learn from everything that happens.
Today I am keeping my eyes open and many head clear so that I don't have to make the same mistake twice.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Carry the message not the mess. - Anon.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 20, 2018 11:58:12 GMT -5
September 20
Daily Reflections
H.P. AS GUIDE
See to it that your relationship with Him is right,
and great events will come to pass for you and
countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 164
Having a right relationship with God seemed to be
an impossible order. My chaotic past had left me
filled with guilt and remorse and I wondered how
this "God business" could work. A.A. told me that
I must turn my will and my life life over to the
care of God, as I understand Him. With nowhere else
to turn, I went down on my knees and cried, "God, I
can't do this. Please help me!" It was when I
admitted my powerlessness that a glimmer of light
began to touch my soul, and then a willingness
emerged to let God control my life. With Him as my
guide, great events began to happen, and I found the
beginning of sobriety.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Step Four is, "Made a searching and fearless moral
inventory of ourselves." Step Five is, " Admitted to
God to ourselves and to another human being the exact
nature of our wrongs." Step Six is, "Were entirely
ready to have God remove all these defects of
character." Step Seven is, "Humbly asked Him to remove
our shortcomings." Step Ten is, "Continued to take
personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly
admitted it." In taking a personal inventory, we have
to be absolutely honest with ourselves and with
other people. Have I taken an honest inventory of myself?
Meditation For The Day
God is good. You can often tell whether or not a thing
is of God. If it is of God, it must be good. Honesty,
purity, unselfishness, and love are all good, unselfish
helpfulness is good, and these things all lead to the
abundant life. Leave in God's hands the present
and the future, knowing only that He is good. The hand
that veils the future is the hand of God. He can bring
order out of chaos, good out of evil, and peace out of
turmoil. We can believe that everything really good comes
from God and that He shares His goodness with us.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may reach out for the good.
I pray that I may try to choose the best in life.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Individual Responsibilities, p.262
Let us emphasize that our reluctance to fight one another, or
anybody else, is not counted as some special virtue which entitles us
A.A.'s to feel superior to other people. Nor does this reluctance
mean that the members of A.A. are going to back away from their
individual responsibilities as citizens. Here they should feel free to
act as they see the right upon the public issues of our times.
But when it comes to A.A. as a whole, that's quite a different matter.
As a group we do not enter into public controversy, because we are
sure that our Society will perish if we do.
12 & 12, p.177
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
All we need to know.
Maintaining
Seen from today's perspective, the early AA members had rather
narrow attitudes toward the study of alcoholism. They became restless
and fidgety if member started discussing psychological aspects of the
problem or gave other indications that they were trying to learn more
about the disease.
While we don't need to hold such narrow attitudes today, we should at
least concede that we don't need complex information to stay sober.
All we have to know is that we have a very compulsive problem that
can be arrested by eliminating the first drink.
Even today, nobody fully knows why the first drink is so deadly for
people like us. Our experience and the experience of others tells us
that it is. That knowledge alone can be an important building block in
finding and maintaining sobriety.
While being open-minded to new information, I'll remember today
that a fairly simple idea.... that I'm an alcoholic and can't live with alcohol....
Is the main thing I need to know.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
---Mark Twain
Sometimes it does no good to try to “deal” with your feelings. For the
moment, we’re stuck. We can only see things one way. No matter
what anyone says, we’re closed up. For the moment. But this puts our
sobriety at risk.
How do we stop self-pity? Focus on someone else. When we really want
to help someone else be happy, we'll ask our Higher Power’s help.
Then things start to change, because our good deeds come back to us.
Remember, service will always keep us sober.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, sometimes I get stuck in my old ways.
Help me change my focus at those times. Help me stay sober.
Action for the Day: I will think of a time when I was stuck in bad feelings.
How did I get out of that spot.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
What difference does it make how I am treated by life? My real life is
within. --Angela L. Wozniak
It is said that we teach people how to treat us. How we treat others invites
similar treatment. Our response to the external conditions of our lives can
be greatly altered by our perceptions of those conditions. And we have
control of that perception. No experience has to demoralize us. Each
situation can be appreciated for its long-term contribution to our growth
as happy, secure women.
No outside circumstances will offer us full time and forever the security
we all long for. And in like manner, none will adversely interfere with our
well being, except briefly and on occasion.
The program offers us the awareness that our security, happiness, and
well being reside within. The uplifting moments of our lives may enhance
our security, but they can't guarantee that it will last. Only the relationship
we have with ourselves and God within can promise the gift of security.
The ripples in my day are reminders to me to go within.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterwards
Though the family does not fully agree with dad’s spiritual activities, they should let him have his head. Even if he displays a certain amount of neglect and irresponsibility towards the family, it is well to let him go as far as he like in helping other alcoholics. During those first days of convalescence, this will do more to insure his sobriety than anything else. Though some of his manifestations are alarming and disagreeable, we think dad will be on a firmer foundation than the man who is placing business or professional success ahead of spiritual development. He will be less likely to drink again, and anything is preferable to that.
pp. 129-130
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I started drinking at age eighteen, rather a late bloomer by today's stands. But after I started, the disease of alcoholism hit me with a vengeance and made up for lost time. After I had been drinking for several years and seriously wondering if I did indeed have a problem with alcohol, I read one of the "Are You An Alcoholic?" quiz-type checklists. Much relieved, I found that almost nothing applied to me: I had never lost a job, a spouse, children, or any material possessions through alcohol. The fact that my drinking hadn't allowed me to gain any of those things crossed my mind only after I came to A.A.
p. 319
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Hence it was most evident that a solitary self-appraisal, and the admission of our defects based upon that alone, wouldn't be nearly enough. We'd have to have outside help if we were surely to know and admit the truth about ourselves--the help of God and another human being. Only by discussing ourselves, holding back nothing, only by being willing to take advice and accept direction could we set foot on the road to straight thinking, solid honesty, and genuine humility.
p. 59
************************************************** *********
Those who created yesterday's pain do not control tomorrow's
potential.
--unknown
The devil brings devastation; God offers restoration.
--unknown
"I do service in Alcoholics Anonymous because it reminds me of where
I came from . . . it keeps me green. And green things grow!"
--unknown
Most people's confusion comes in the area of their desires, not their
needs. Giving can be one of the greatest ways to receiving. If you
want more love, give love. If you want more joy, be joyful. Look for
the good in all things and situations, and you may be surprised at what
you see.
--John-Roger
All we need to do is allow more joy and love into our experience. We
need to really choose it, to allow ourselves to feel it, paying attention,
choosing to be alive and to be kind; allowing ourselves to feel and to
be nurtured by the natural order of the Spirit of God. When we choose
and allow it, the dramas fall away and dissolve.
--Patricia Sun
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it
takes to sit down and listen.
--Winston Churchill
"Fear less, hope more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more;
Hate less, love more; And all good things are yours."
--Swedish Proverb
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SHARING
"The mass of men lead lives of
quiet desperation."
-- Henry David Thoreau
I thought that I was the only one who felt like I did. Nobody could
possibly understand. I was different from everybody and needed
to keep my life -- my true life -- a secret. I was living a life of
quiet desperation! Then I went to a meeting for recovering
alcoholics and heard somebody share my pain, my loneliness, my
confusion, my addiction -- my life.
I was lonely because I kept myself separate from people. I saw
them as being different from myself, and so I remained the lonely
and isolated victim. Strange how similar we are when we begin to
share. When we get beneath culture, class and creed, we discover
sensitive human beings trying to make sense of their lives. We need
each other.
May I risk rejection in my spiritual need to share and be known.
************************************************** *********
The wicked draw the sword and bend the bow to bring down the poor
and needy, to slay those whose ways are upright. But their swords will
pierce their own hearts, and their bows will be broken. Better the little
that the righteous have than the wealth of many wicked; for the power
of the wicked will be broken, but the LORD upholds the righteous.
The days of the blameless are known to the LORD, and their
inheritance will endure forever. In times of disaster they will not
wither; in days of famine they will enjoy plenty. But the wicked will
perish: The LORD's enemies will be like the beauty of the fields, they
will vanish--vanish like smoke.
Psalm 37:14-20
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as
the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be
afraid."
John 14:27
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
You make a difference every time you smile, speak kindly or give of yourself.
Lord, You ask for nothing but goodness of me. What peace it brings to my soul.
Listen carefully to the things you say. The advice we give to others is often the
best advice for us to follow. Lord, help me to follow that which I know is right
even when it is difficult.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Courage To Change
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
Serenity Prayer
Recovery involves change, and change means doing things differently. The problem is, many of us resist doing things differently; what we're doing may not be working, but at least we're familiar with it. It takes courage to step out into the unknown. How do we find that courage?
We can look around ourselves at NA meetings. There, we see others who've found they needed to change what they were doing and who've done so successfully. Not only does that help quiet our fear that change - any change - spells disaster, it also gives us the benefit of their experience with what does work, experience we can use in changing what doesn't.
We can also look at our own recovery experience. Even if that experience, so far, has been limited to stopping the use of drugs, still we have made many changes in our lives - changes for the good. Whatever aspects of our lives we have applied the steps to, we have always found surrender better than denial, recovery superior to addiction. Our own experience and the experience of others in NA tells us that "changing the things I can" is a big part of what recovery is all about. The steps and the power to practice them give us the direction and courage we need to change. We have nothing to fear.
Just for today: I welcome change. With the help of my Higher Power, I will find the courage to change the things I can.
pg. 274
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Education should be the process of helping everyone to discover his uniqueness. --Leo Buscaglia
We are each special, which means there is not another person just like ourselves. Nobody looks just like us. Nobody's voice sounds quite like our own. And nobody thinks through a story just like we do.
Each of us has been created for a special purpose. Maybe it's for what we'll teach a friend, or the way we'll help a sister or a brother. Every day will give us chances to offer our special talents to others. Our being alive is God's way of proving that we're important to the family, the neighborhood, and the world.
What important task lies before me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Sexuality expresses God's intention that people find authentic humanness not in isolation but in relationship. --James B. Nelson
We men have regarded our sex lives and our spiritual lives as two different worlds. This attitude has caused many crises -- anger and frustration with our partners, power struggles, accusations and hurt feelings, shame and guilt about our own behavior.
We can join our spirituality with our sexual selves by taking responsibility for being sexual. Being responsible means we take the risk of being vulnerable, of giving and receiving affection and sexual expression in our relationships. We cannot expect satisfaction of our desires simply because we feel them. In sexuality, as in all parts of our lives, our Higher Power is our guide. We can also say no to sexual expression if we wish.
God guide my sexual awareness today. Open me to experience sexuality as a creative gift for relationships.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
What difference does it make how I am treated by life? My real life is within. --Angela L. Wozniak
It is said that we teach people how to treat us. How we treat others invites similar treatment. Our response to the external conditions of our lives can be greatly altered by our perceptions of those conditions. And we have control of that perception. No experience has to demoralize us. Each situation can be appreciated for its long-term contribution to our growth as happy, secure women.
No outside circumstances will offer us full time and forever the security we all long for. And in like manner, none will adversely interfere with our well being, except briefly and on occasion.
The program offers us the awareness that our security, happiness, and well being reside within. The uplifting moments of our lives may enhance our security, but they can't guarantee that it will last. Only the relationship we have with ourselves and God within can promise the gift of security.
The ripples in my day are reminders to me to go within.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Spontaneity
In recovery, we're learning to let ourselves go! We're learning to be spontaneous.
Spontaneity may frighten some of us. We may be afraid of the loss of control involved with spontaneity. We may still be operating under the codependent rules that prohibit spontaneity: be good; be right; be perfect; be strong; don't have fun; and always be in control.
We may associate spontaneity with acting out in an addictive, compulsive, self destructive, or irresponsible manner.
That's not what we're talking about in recovery. Positive spontaneity involves freely expressing who we are - in a way that is fun, healthy, doesn't hurt us, and doesn't infringe on the right of others.
We learn to be spontaneous and free as we grow in self-awareness and self esteem. Spontaneity emerges as our confidence and trust in ourselves increase, and we become more secure in our ability to maintain healthy boundaries.
Being spontaneous is connected to our ability to play and achieve intimacy. For all those desirable acts, we need to be able to let go of our need to control others and ourselves and fully and freely enter into the present moment.
Let go of your tight rein on yourself. So what if you make a mistake? So what if you're wrong? Relish your imperfections. Let yourself be a little needy, a little vulnerable. Take a risk!
We can be spontaneous without hurting ourselves, or others. In fact, everyone will benefit by our spontaneity.
Today, I will throw out the rulebook and enjoy being who I am. I will have some fun with the gift of life, others, and myself.
I am very grateful for this day. I am grateful for all the love and inspiration that I receive from my Higher Power wherever I ask. I just stop and tune in to this universal energy and am transformed to the level of my willingness. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey To The Heart
Discover What Interests You
There are many magical things to learn in our world and many people happy to teach us how to do them.
Are there things or activities you’ve been interested in, but you’ve talked yourself out of? Is there something new you’d like to learn how to do or at least explore? What sounds like fun to you?
What interests you? You have a right to be creative. You deserve to learn and grow. Find activities that stimulate you, teach you, help you learn more about yourself and life. Do the things your heart leads you to do.
How easy it is to talk ourselves out of trying something new. Let yourself enjoy life. Let yourself do the things you want to do.
Begin a journey of discovery. Find out what interests you. Listen to yourself for a few days, for a few weeks. Discover what stimulates your creative juices. Then follow that idea through.
*****
more language of letting go
Experience your life
As soon as you say, "I want to change"-- make a program-- a counter force is created that prevents you from change. Changes are taking place by themselves. If you go deeper into what you are, if you accept what is there, then a change automatically occurs by itself. This is the paradox of change.
--Frederick S. Perls
Dr. Frederick S. Perls, founder of Gestalt therapy, profoundly influenced my life. When I worked in therapeutic communities, to "Gestalt" a feeling meant to go fully into that feeling, to become one with the feeling, to totally and completely accept the feeling and the experience as a means of transcending, healing, or dealing with it.
How do we change? Don't force yourself. Let yourself change. Let yourself be. Go as fully into the experience of your life, your feelings, and being you that you can.
When you come out, you'll be different.
Accept who you are then,too.
Don't intellectualize your life. Experience it.
God, help me accept who and where I am, and how I feel today. Then tomorrow, help me do the same.
*****
An Exercise in Self
Seeking Advice from Yourself by Madisyn Taylor
A helpful exercise is to set up an advisory panel of your past, present, and future selves.
Since we probably know ourselves better than anyone else does, then we may very well be the best person to ask for advice when we are in a quandary. One interesting exercise is to try asking for advice from your past and future selves. There is the younger self that you used to be and the older, more mature self that you will become. You can gain a different perspective when you view present situations through your younger self’s eyes or your mature self’s more experienced point of view. Perhaps, your younger self would view a current dilemma in a more innocent, less cynical way. Likewise, your older, hopefully wiser, self may offer advice from a more compassionate, experienced perspective.
Think back to how you viewed the world when you were younger. What were your thoughts on happiness, love, and injustice? Think about how you would have reacted to a dilemma you are currently facing. The perspective may shed a different light on relationships, money matters, or life decisions. Likewise, think about the person you will become. A more mature version of you might mull a problem or conflict over carefully before taking action right away… or perhaps not. Maybe your older self would be more willing to take risks, care less about what other people think, and want to enjoy life more.
You can even set up an advisory panel of your past, present, and future selves. You might even want to try to have a written dialogue with your selves to record the thoughts, feelings, and advice that your younger and older selves might have for your present self regarding a current situation. Your different selves can give you some invaluable answers. After all, no one can know you better than your selves. You are your wisest guide. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“When a man has reached a condition in which he believed that a thing must happen when he does not wish it, and that which he wishes to happen can never be, this is really the state called desperation.” Schopenhauer.
The very real pain of emotional difficulties is sometimes very hard to take while we’re trying to maintain sobriety. Yet we learn, in time, that overcoming such problems is the real test of The Program’s way of living. Do I believe that adversity gives me more opportunity to grow than does comfort or success?
Today I Pray
May I believe firmly that God, in His infinite wisdom, does not send me those occasional moments of emotional stress in order to tease my sobriety, but to challenge me to grow in my control and my conviction. May I learn not to be afraid of emotional summits and canyons for The Program has outfitted me for all kinds of terrain.
Today I Will Remember
Strength through adversity.
******************************
One More Day
The natural wish of every human being, the weakest as well as the wisest, seems to be, to leave some memorial of themselves to posterity.
– Susan Edmonstone Ferrier
Each of us wants to leave evidence of our having lived. To perpetuate our names, we may work and play hard all our lives, or we may attempt to fine-tune sports skills or handcrafts.
We become gradually aware that material records of our lives will merely note our names and dates; they will not record who we are and what we value. The essence of each of us is found in each day, each moment. It is in living each day fully that we proclaim our worth and reflect it to our loved ones. What really matters, we realize, is how we spend our present, not how we try to manipulate the future. Living richly today is our memorial.
I will use today as a complete gift unto itself, not as a small brick for a future monument.
************************************************** ***************
Food For Thought
A New Self-Image
As we lose weight, our self-image needs to change along with our body. We may have had a mental image of our self as a thin person, but this image probably did not go beyond the physical. If we continue to think of our self as the same confused, compulsive, childish person we once were, we are not facilitating our emotional and spiritual growth.
The OA program gives us the power to become a new person. If we see ourselves as daily growing saner, more serene, more confident, reality will reflect our inner vision.
Perhaps the most important change in our self-image involves our relationship to our Higher Power. Before, we probably saw ourselves as the center of our world and devoted our energies to protecting and building up our fragile ego. We were all alone in an unfriendly world. Now, we see ourselves as God’s creation, subject to His purpose and plan. As we yield to His authority and accept His love, we find strength, security, and peace. By losing ourselves, we find ourselves.
Create in me a new self-image.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
FILLING THE VOID
“You can't have everything.
Where would you put it?”
Steven Wright.
I’d thought marriage alone would heal all the hurts I’d gathered up in my life. My husband, also the product of a dysfunctional family, felt the same way. We quickly learned that our love for each other was not enough to our emptiness.
I was used to using food to temporarily fill my inner-holes; he was used to abusing another substance to fill his. Neither worked well, and we soon discovered that buying things we didn’t need would help to temporarily fill some of our hurts. Pretty soon we had a house that was full of things we’d bought that had given only a few moments of pleasure at best.
One of the benefits of program life is that I’ve learned to fill the holes within me in ways that really work. I want to make my life more simple and less cluttered. Three years later, I’m still getting rid of things we bought and never used again. But the best part is we can go to the mall when we really do need something and not feel the compulsion to buy something we don’t need.
One day at a time...
I will use the lessons I've learned working the program to finally heal the hurts within me instead of looking for material things to repair these inner-holes.
~ Rhonda H.
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We suggest you draw the book to the attention of the doctor who is to attend your patient during treatment. If the book is read the moment the patient is able, while acutely depressed, realization of his condition may come to him.
We hope the doctor will tell the patient the truth about his condition, whatever that happens to be. When the man is presented with this volume it is best that no one tell him he must abide by its suggestions. The man must decide for himself. - Pg. 144 - To Employers
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The professionals in our new life may appraise our situation better than us. They are not romantically linked to our love affair with drugs. Therefore, their evaluation may be more nearly correct.
May I have the ability to listen to those trying to help me; they honestly may be more objective than myself.
Loving Myself through Action
I want to do something special for myself today. Giving to others and withholding from myself doesn't work. I tend to treat other people the way that I treat myself. If I am stingy with me, I will, somewhere along the line, act that out with other people. If I am hard on myself, I will tend to be hard on others. I am the only person who is with me all hours of the day and I know what feels good and warm to me. I know what makes me feel sustained from within. Today, I will encourage, support and congratulate myself. Each time I do something that pleases me I'll say 'thank you' to myself. Each time I do something well, I'll tell myself 'good job.'
I will be my own best cheerleader.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
When you are having a bad day, lower your expectations and start over!
The more I work on me - the better most people behave.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Today do something for someone you love: Leave them alone.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am very grateful for this day.
I am grateful for all the love and inspiration that I receive from my Higher Power wherever I ask.
I just stop and tune in to this universal energy and am transformed to the level of my willingness.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
We have an approach called the Dumb Guy Approach to sobriety. We follow the directions that are in the AA Big Book. We don't make up any directions, there are already directions in here. If the book says we should read, we read. If it says to pray, we pray. If it says write, we write. Simple as that; 'Duh dum, ah what the hell, I can do that.' - Milt L.
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Post by caressa222 on Sept 20, 2018 19:26:02 GMT -5
September 21
Daily Reflections
THE LAST PROMISE
We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us
what we could not do for ourselves.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84
The last Promise in the Big Book came true for me
on the very first day of sobriety. God kept me sober
that day, and on every other day I allowed Him to
operate in my life. He gives me the strength, courage
and guidance to meet my responsibilities in life so
that I am then able to reach out and help others stay
sober and grow. He manifests within me, making me a
channel of His word, thought and deed. He works with
my inner self, while I produce in the outer world, for
He will not do for me what I can do for myself. I must
be willing to do His work, so that He can function
through me successfully.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Let us continue with Steps Four, Five, Six, Seven
and Ten. In taking personal inventory of ourselves,
we have to face facts as they really are. We have to
stop running away. We must face reality. We must see
ourselves as we really are. We must admit our faults
openly and try to correct them. We must try to see
where we have been dishonest, impure, selfish, and
unloving. We do not do this once and forget it. We
do it every day of our lives, as long as we live. We
are never done with checking up on ourselves. Am I
taking a daily inventory of myself?
Meditation For The Day
In improving our personal lives, we have Unseen help.
We were not made so that we could see God. That would
be too easy for us and there would be no merit in
obeying Him. It takes an act of faith, a venture of
belief, to realize the Unseen Power. Yet, we have much
evidence of God's existence in the strength that many
people have received from the act of faith, the venture
of belief. We are in a box of space and time and we can
see neither our souls nor God. God and the human spirit
are both outside the limitations of space and time. Yet
our Unseen help is effective here and now. That has
been proved in thousands of changed lives.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may make the great venture of belief.
I pray that my vision may not be blocked by intellectual pride.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Fear And Faith, p.263
The achievement of freedom from fear is a lifetime undertaking, one
that can never be wholly completed.
When under heavy attack, acute illness, or in other conditions of
serious insecurity, we shall all react to this emotion--well or badly, as
the case may be. Only the self-deceived will claim perfect freedom
from fear.
********************************
We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our
make-up. Sometimes we had to search persistently, but He was
there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great
Reality deep down within us.
1. Grapevine, January 1962
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.55
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The Good that I do____ Action
Why do we hold back when we’re offered the opportunity to help others or to do something unusually kind? Why is it that many people are reluctant to give of themselves unless rewarded with recognition or praise?
We may hold back because we do not understand that any good action always brings its own reward. Despite Shakespeare’s timeless saying, the good we do is not “interred with our bones”… it does survive, now and in the future.
We’ve learned in Twelve Step programs that it’s not really satisfying to work only for recognition and praise. There also has to be a confident feeling that our efforts are contributing to a large good with a worthwhile purpose. That’s what makes AA so special to people who are completely devoted to it… we know that anything done for AA makes the world a better place.
We should also know that those who can help others are fortunate, well-favored people. Others may want to help, but lack the tools. We have the tools to give the help that changes lives---- and the world.
The good that I do today is a treasure I’ll always possess.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Love doesn’t make the world go around. Love is what makes the
ride worthwhile. ---Franklin Jones
Before recovery, anger, self-pity, and sadness often filled our hearts.
The world went on. We came to hate the ride.
In recovery, love fills our hearts. We begin to love life. Love is really
caring about what happens to other people. Love is what makes the
ride worth it
We find much love in our program. People really mater to us. We really
matter to others. For many of us, we learn how to love in our meetings.
The program teaches love because the program is love.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll welcome love into my heart and
others into my life. Love brings me closer to my Higher Power.
Action for the Day: I’ll list all the people I love and why they matter
to me.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Praise and an attitude of gratitude are unbeatable stimulators . . .
we increase whatever we extol. --Sylvia Stitt Edwards
What outlook are we carrying forth into the day ahead? Are we feeling
fearful about the circumstances confronting us? Do we dread a planned
meeting? Are we worried about the welfare of a friend or lover?
Whatever our present outlook, its power over the outcome of our day
is profound. Our attitude in regard to any situation attracting our attention
influences the outcome. Sometimes to our favor, often to our disfavor if
our attitude is negative.
Thankfulness toward life guarantees the rewards we desire, the rewards
we seek too often from an ungrateful stance. The feeling of gratitude is
foreign to many of us. We came to this program feeling worthless,
sometimes rejected, frequently depressed. It seemed life had heaped
problems in our laps, and so it had. The more we lamented what life
"gave us," the more reasons we were given to lament. We got just
what we expected. We still get just what we expect. The difference is
that the program has offered us the key to higher expectations.
Gratitude for the good in our lives increases the good.
I have the personal power to influence my day; I will make it a good one.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
Those of us who have spent much time in the world of spiritual make-believe have eventually seen the childishness of it. This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose, accompanied by a growing consciousness of the power of God in our lives. We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness.
p. 130
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I can't blame one ounce of my drinking on my upbringing. My parents were loving and supportive and have been married thirty-five years. No one else in my family exhibits alcoholic drinking or alcoholic behavior. For some reason, despite the resources available to me growing up, I developed into an adult woman terrified of the world around me. I was extremely insecure, though I was careful to hide this fact. I was unable to handle and understand my emotions; I always felt as if everyone else knew what was going on and what they were supposed to be doing, and my life was the only one that was delivered without an instruction book.
pp. 319-320
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Yet many of us still hung back. We said, "Why can't 'God as we understand Him' tell us where we are astray? If the Creator gave us our lives in the first place, then He must know in every detail where we have since gone wrong. Why don't we make our admissions to Him directly? Why do we need to bring anyone else into this?"
p. 59
************************************************** *********
Four steps to achievement:
Plan purposefully. Prepare prayerfully. Proceed positively. Pursue
persistently.
--William A. Ward
Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up
and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come.
You wait and watch and work: you don't give up.
--Anne Lamott
Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase,
just take the first step.
--Martin Luther King Jr.
Forget mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what
you're going to do now and do it. Today is your lucky day.
--Will Durant
Laughter is the sound of recovery.
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ACTION
"I shall pass through this world
but once. If, therefore, there be
any kindness I can show, or any
good thing I can do, let me do it
now; let me not defer it or
neglect it, for I shall not pass
this way again."
-- Etienne de Grellet
Today I know that God requires me to be involved in my recovery and
sobriety. God has always wanted me to be sober but the miracle took
place when I wanted it, too. His hands were always extended towards
me, the miracle happened when I chose to embrace Him. My sobriety
involves me.
Today I understand that sobriety is more than "not picking up the first
drink"; it involves quiet acts of kindness to myself and others. God
works through me -- through my hands, my smile, my voice, my love
and my acceptance. When an opportunity arises for me to be
ordinarily kind, I intend to give it; God knows I have needed such
kindnesses from others in the past.
May I never avoid an opportunity for shared healing.
************************************************** *********
I wait for the Lord, my soul waits and in His word I put my hope.
Psalm 130 : 5
"Grace, mercy, and peace will be with you from God the Father and
from the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father, in truth and
love."
2 John 1:3
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Spend less time on the dreams of life and more time on the joys of living.
Lord, help me to view my troubles as smaller than they are until together
we make them disappear.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Prayer
"Prayer takes practice, and we should remind ourselves that skilled people were not born with their skills."
Basic Text, p.45
Many of us came into recovery with no experience in prayer and worried about not knowing the "right words!" Some of us remembered the words we'd learned in childhood but weren't sure we believed in those words anymore. Whatever our background, in recovery we struggled to find words that spoke truly from our hearts.
Often the first prayer we attempt Is a simple request to our Higher Power asking for help in staying clean each day. We may ask for guidance and courage or simply pray for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out. If we find ourselves stumbling in our prayers, we may ask other members to share with us about how they learned to pray. No matter whether we pray in need or pray in joy, the important thing is to keep making the effort.
Our prayers will be shaped by our experience with the Twelve Steps and our personal understanding of a Higher Power. As our relationship with that Higher Power develops, we become more comfortable with prayer. In time, prayer becomes a source of strength and comfort. We seek that source often and willingly.
Just for today: I know that prayer can be simple. I will start where I am and practice.
pg. 275
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Silently one by one
in the infinite meadows of heaven
Blossomed the lovely stars,
the forget-me-nots of angels.
--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Tales told about the stars reflect a lot about the people who tell them. The constellation now called Orion was once called Hippolyta. Hippolyta was one of the Amazon queens. The Amazons were women warriors who had four leaders instead of one: two older women and two younger women. Everyone could benefit from the experience and wisdom of the older and the strength and vigor of the younger.
After Hippolyta died, they named this constellation for her to honor her and remind themselves of her wisdom and bravery.
We can draw a good lesson from the value the Amazons placed on the contribution each one could make, no matter how young or old. When we remain alert to the possibility of learning from people we hadn't seriously considered as teachers, we are reminded of our often forgotten value to others.
What can I offer in wisdom or strength to others today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
He underwent a nine and a half hour operation. On the eighth day his wife picked him up from the hospital and said, "You want to go home?" to which he replied, "No, I want to go to the office." --Herb Goldberg
What is it that drives us men to such extremes in our work? Are we afraid of the intimacy we could develop with those who love us and whom we love? Are we driven to prove over and over that some old painful self-doubt is untrue? Is this how we feel masculine? Or are we trying to control our addictive problems by constant work? Perhaps we still have more to learn about surrender and powerlessness.
It is especially common to recovering men that the excesses of work unconsciously replace the excesses of addiction and codependency. This too is an unhealthy escape. We must confront our relationship to work if we are to continue on our path of spiritual awakening. It is good to have some unplanned, unstructured time in each day.
Today, help me remember that being good at my work is only one of my qualities.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Praise and an attitude of gratitude are unbeatable stimulators . . . we increase whatever we extol. --Sylvia Stitt Edwards
What outlook are we carrying forth into the day ahead? Are we feeling fearful about the circumstances confronting us? Do we dread a planned meeting? Are we worried about the welfare of a friend or lover? Whatever our present outlook, its power over the outcome of our day is profound. Our attitude in regard to any situation attracting our attention influences the outcome. Sometimes to our favor, often to our disfavor if our attitude is negative.
Thankfulness toward life guarantees the rewards we desire, the rewards we seek too often from an ungrateful stance. The feeling of gratitude is foreign to many of us. We came to this program feeling worthless, sometimes rejected, frequently depressed. It seemed life had heaped problems in our laps, and so it had. The more we lamented what life "gave us," the more reasons we were given to lament. We got just what we expected. We still get just what we expect. The difference is that the program has offered us the key to higher expectations. Gratitude for the good in our lives increases the good.
I have the personal power to influence my day; I will make it a good one.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Urgency
One thing at a time.
That's all we have to do. Not two things at once, but one thing done in peace.
One task at a time. One feeling at a time. One day at a time. One problem at a time. One step at a time.
One pleasure at a time.
Relax. Let go of urgency. Begin calmly now. Take one thing at a time.
See how everything works out?
Today, I will peacefully approach one thing at a time. When in doubt, I will take first things first.
Today I am taking whatever comes in my stride. Today I know I can handle any change, any surprise, anything as long as I remember that my Higher Power is with me and I am never alone. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey To The Heart
Appreciate Your Sensuality
Learn to appreciate and enjoy your sensuality.
Caress the petals of a gentle magnolia blossom. Inhale its scent. Touch the stem of a rose and carefully feel its thorns. Put our finger on a cactus. Sit down and feel the grass. Touch a tree, put your hand on the craggy rough bark and hold it there for a while. Cradle a rock in your hands, hold it close until you feel its temperature, its texture. Then place the rock next to your cheek and see what it feels like there. Feel the difference between a cotton sheet and a soft woolen blanket. Feel how water feels on your skin, or how the warm night air caresses your face. Touch a baby’s foot.
Learn to appreciate your sensuality. It will open you up to the energy of the world around you. It will open you to the life, passion, creativity, and textures within yourself.
*****
more language of letting go
Revere your connections
Things derive their being and nature from mutual dependence and are nothing by themselves.
--Nagarjuna
We are dependent on much around us, not just for our survival, but for our joy. We need food, water, and the company of our fellow travelers on this great journey.
We can be self-sufficient in our attitude to take care of ourselves, yet we need the world around us in order to live and to be fully alive.
We are one part of a whole. We are a complete part, but nonetheless, a part. We need the other parts. The other parts need us.
Just as we're influenced and impacted by those who touch us, we influence and impact them with our thoughts, words, and behaviors. We cannot control others. Look at the difference in our relationships when we speak gently and lovingly, and when we scream.
While it is great to revel in the blessing of existence, the world becomes more interesting and alive when we recognize everyone and everything else in it,too. This body cannot be without the sustenance of food, and our soul's experience here would be greatly reduced were it not for the company of other spirits we have met.
While we do not need to live up to anyone's expectations of us, we need to remember that our actions will impact those around us. Yes, we have the liberty to think, feel, and behave however we choose. But what we do will touch the lives of others.
We are not responsible for other people. But we have responsibilities to them.
Revel in your freedom. But revere and honor your connection to the world around you. Take responsibility for how you touch and connect with everything and everyone in your life today.
Live reverently, compassionately, and respectfully toward yourself and all else in the world.
God, give me reverence and respect for all life.
*****
Opening the Channels of Communication
Dealing with Difficult People by Madisyn Taylor
When dealing with a difficult person, try not to be judgmental or defensive in your conversation with them.
We encounter a wide variety of people throughout our lives. Many of them touch us in some positive way. Occasionally, however, we encounter those individuals who, for whatever reason, can be difficult to deal with. Perhaps this person is a colleague or close friend that you feel is deliberately being obtuse, inviting in trouble, or doing foolish things that you find annoying. Sometimes, it may be possible to appease or avoid those people short term. Dealing with them in the long term, however, can be exhausting. The behavior of difficult people can even make you feel like losing your temper, but keep your cool. Staying calm is the first step, especially when you are ready to confront them.
Avoiding a difficult person can improve impossible and not in your best interest, especially if you live or work together. Likewise, attempts to steer clear of them can become a source of stress and anxiety when they are a part of your social circle. When this is the case, it is best to kindly address the problem. Try not to let their actions or mood affect you. You also may want to try expressing your feelings directly. Tell to the person how their actions make you feel and encourage them toward a more positive course of action. Speak assertively, but respectfully, and don’t portray yourself as a victim. Another approach for dealing with a difficult individual is to gain a deeper understanding of who that person is. Ask them why they do or say certain things. If you disagree with their motives, question them further so you can try and discover the root of their behaviors. In doing so, you may be able to gently shift their perceptions, or at least help them understand your ! point of view.
You may want to think about what you want to say to a difficult person before you actually talk to them. If you can, avoid being judgmental or defensive, and try to approach the conversation objectively. If the person is open to the idea, try coming to an agreement. If approaching them fails, let it go and move on. There is no reason to let a difficult person or situation have power over your state of being. Remember that a lot can be accomplished when you take the time to listen and offer up alternative perspectives. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I’ve heard it said that when God closes a door, He opens a window. Since I started working the Twelve Steps, much of the fear and pain that haunted my life is gone. Some of my defects have been lifted from me, though I’m still wrestling with others. I believe that if I continue to work the Twelve Steps over and over again, my life will continue to improve — physically, mentally, and spiritually. Am I more willing and better able to help others by working the Steps myself?
Today I Pray
I give thanks to God for showing me that the Twelve Steps are a stairway to a saner life. As I re-work them conscientiously, my life does get better, healthier and nearer to my Higher Power. As I continue to live them, may I feel the same gratitude and exaltation of spirit as those who are just now discovering them.
Today I Will Remember
Step by Step, day by day.
******************************
One More Day
….Summer coming to an end. So we all try to keep it awake and stretch it out by squeezing in all the boating, picnicking, swimming. Sun, I crave all year.
– Sister Mary Kraemer
As the days begin to shorten and become cooler, we may suddenly be struck by the realization that the summer is over. With that thought might come the need to fill the last warm days with many activities we postponed or, perhaps, forgot. At times like these, we may sense the need to hang on a little longer to the summer.
We do the same thing in other areas of our lives. At the moment we realize we are about to lose something very precious, that is when we value it most. Just before a dear friend moves away, we try to fill our days with togetherness. Knowing this can help us use our time more wisely and remind us to see the value in everyone and everything around us.
I will let others know I value them, and why.
************************************************** *****************
Food For Thought
Trusting Gut Reactions
Since we could not trust ourselves where food was concerned, we had trouble trusting ourselves in all aspects of life. We became divided internally and unsure of what we thought or how we felt or how we should act. We may have depended on other people to tell us what we liked, what to do, and how to do it.
It is with a great sense of joy that we become aware of our own individuality and preferences. If we experience a negative gut reaction to a certain person or activity, then we need to examine our reasons for continuing the relationship or activity. We do not have to like everyone, nor do we have to do everything. The sooner we become selective, the more we develop as individuals and the more integrity we possess. If we continually force ourselves to do things, which violate our inner integrity, then we are frustrated and growth is slow.
Gut reactions need to be examined calmly and intelligently. They are there to tell us something about ourselves.
Give me a healthy respect for my gut reactions.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
~ New Worlds ~
Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.
Anais Nin
Most of us are so compulsive at almost everything we do, that allowing people in to know our garbage of the past and present is unheard of.
You go to a meeting, find a new recovery friend and that friend opens a new door. You and that friend step through and WOW ... the world in that room looks great! Later at another meeting, you meet another recovery friend and another door is opened. You and your two new friends step through and you find an even better world view. This continues to happen meeting after meeting, step after step, room after room and your personal lives begins to look much brighter and more beautiful, like there really is hope.
Funny how it's still the same world but friends, recovery and Higher Power make it a much better worldly view.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will never end this beautiful cycle of finding new worlds as long as I never lose sight of my Higher Power, my recovery friends and my recovery program.
~ Jeanette ~
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again, ask him to read this book in the interval. After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on. He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within.
If he thinks he can do the job in some other way, or prefers some other spiritual approach, encourage him to follow his own conscience. We have no monopoly on God; we merely have an approach that worked with us. But point out that we alcoholics have much in common and that you would like, in any case, to be friendly. Let it go at that. - Pg. 95 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
If you were the helper and not the helpee, how would you like the person you were working with to behave? Are you acting in a manner consistent with what you believe is right?
Help me act in the same manner I would have others act with me under the same circumstances.
Silver Linings
I search for silver linings, for the deeper meaning of the events in my life. Life is my teacher if I can learn to read the subtle messages that are laced into the circumstances that I co-create around me. I will look for the lesson. When life offers up its inevitable challenges, I will try to understand what I am meant to see that I am not seeing, what I am meant to hear that I am not hearing, what I am meant to know that I am not knowing. There is always a silver lining if I look for it. Even if I don't see it readily, I trust that it is there and that it will reveal itself to me over time. Life isn't simple. One of the ways that I can grow from life's adversities, is to see what is positive about a difficult situation, to look for the silver lining. I can grow in joy and in pain. It doesn't need to be one or the other because pain can transform into joy. It can be the fire that clears the field for new and tender growth.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Do you like being lied to? Didn't think so. Yet how many times have you said, 'I'm fine' or 'Everything's OK' when it's not? When your friends ask how you are, they deserve not to be lied to. When you lie to others, you lie to yourself.
I am authentic with others and thus myself.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you want to know God's will, spend time with Him.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am taking whatever comes in my stride.
Today I know I can handle any change, any surprise, anything as long as I remember that my Higher Power is with me and I am never alone.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'd wake up in the morning and my mind would be waiting like a vulture on the bed head: 'Good, I've been waiting for you.' - And it never told me anything positive. - Bob E.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 22, 2018 8:43:55 GMT -5
September 22
Daily Reflections
A "LIMITLESS LODE"
Like a gaunt prospector, belt drawn in over the last
ounce of food, our pick struck gold. Joy at our
release from a lifetime of frustration knew no bounds.
Father feels he has struck something better than gold.
For a time he may try to hug the new treasure to himself.
He may not see at once that he has barely scratched a
limitless lode which will pay dividends only if he mines
it for the rest of his life and insists on giving away
the entire product.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 128-29
When I talk with a newcomer to A.A., my past looks me
straight in the face. I see the pain in those hopeful
eyes, I extend my hand, and then the miracle happens: I
become healed. My problems vanish as I reach out to his
trembling soul.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Step Eight is, "Made a list of all persons we had harmed
and became willing to make amends to them all." Step Nine
is, "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible,
except when to do so would injure them or others." Making
restitution for the wrongs we have done is often very
difficult. It hurts our pride. But the rewards are great.
When we go to a person and say we are sorry, the reaction
we get is almost invariably good. It takes courage to make
the plunge, but the results more than justify it. A load is
off your chest and often an enemy has been turned into
a friend. Have I done my best to make all the restitution
possible?
Meditation For The Day
There should be joy in living the spiritual life. A faith
without joy is not entirely genuine. If you are not happier
as a result of your faith, there is probably something wrong
with it. Faith in God should bring you a deep feeling of
happiness and security, no matter what happens on the surface
of your life. Each new day is another opportunity to serve God
and improve your relationships with other people. This should
bring joy. Life should be abundant and outreaching. It should
be glowing and outgoing, in ever widening circles.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that my horizons may grow ever wider.
I pray that I may keep reaching out for more service
and companionship.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
The Step That Keeps Us growing, p.264
Sometimes, when friends tell us how well we are doing, we know
better inside. We know we aren't doing well enough. We still
can't handle life, as life is. There must be a serious flaw
somewhere in our spiritual practice and development.
What, then, is it?
The chances are better than even that we shall locate our trouble in
our misunderstanding or neglect of A.A.'s Step Eleven--prayer,
meditation, and the guidance of God.
The other Steps can keep most of us sober and somehow functioning.
But Step Eleven can keep us growing, if we try hard and work at it
continually.
Grapevine, June 1958
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Making tough decisions
Decision Making
An AA member in a supervisor's position was faced with the need to
terminate an unsatisfactory employee. Procrastinating about this
unpleasant matter, she found herself wishing that the employee
would suddenly find another job, thus making the termination
ordeal unnecessary.
But further reflection showed that the procrastination was related
to the same problems that had dogged her in her drinking years.
She was a people=pleaser; she felt guilty about inflicting pain on others.
She was finally able to make the tough decision and call the employee
in for termination. In the process, she discovered that a brief prayer
time for preparation and a gentle manner removed some of the pain
for her and the employee being terminated. She learned that the
principles of the program could help her become more decisive
without being brutal.
I'll look over any tough decisions I;ve been putting off and determination
why I'm behaving that way. Am I prolonging tough decisions just as
I did when drinking?
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
One Day at a Time. Program slogan
This slogan means we are to take with us only the joys and
problems of the present day.
We don’t carry with us the mistakes of the days gone by. We
have no room for them. We are to work at loving others today.
Just today.
It’s crazy for us to think we can handle more than one day at a
time. During our illness, we lived everywhere but in the here
and now. We looked to the future or punished ourselves with
our past. One Day at a Time teaches us to go easy. It teaches
us to focus on what really means anything to us: the here and now.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me turn the slogans
of my programs into a way of life. Help me to live life moment
by moment, One Day at a Time.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll practice living in the present.
When I find myself living in the past or in the future, I’ll bring
myself back to today.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Anger conquers when unresolved. --Anonymous
Emotions need recognition. But not only attention; they also
need acceptance as powerful dimensions of who we are. Their
influence over who we are capable of becoming is mighty.
Respectful attention and willing acceptance of our emotions,
whether fear or anger or hateful jealousy, takes away their sting.
We can prevent them from growing larger than they are. Like a
child who screams and misbehaves more and more fiercely until
attention is won, our emotions grow larger and more intense the
longer we deny their existence.
Our emotions bless us, in reality. They enrich our experiences.
They serve as guideposts on the road we're traveling. How we
"feel" at any single moment flags the level of our security, how
close we are to our higher power, the level of our commitment
to the program. They serve us well when acknowledged. On
the other hand, when ignored or denied, they can immobilize
us, even defeat us.
My feelings frequent my being, always. They steer my behavior.
They reflect my attitudes. They hint at my closeness to God.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
One more suggestion: Whether the family has spiritual convictions or not, they may do well to examine the principles by which the alcoholic member is trying to live. They can hardly fail to approve these simple principles, though the head of the house still fails somewhat in practicing them. Nothing will help the man who is off on a spiritual tangent so much as the wife who adopts a sane spiritual program, making a better practical use of it.
p. 130
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
When I discovered alcohol, everything changed. I took my first real drink my first night of college. I attended what was to be the first of many, many fraternity parties. I didn't care for the beer, so I went for the vat of innocuous-looking punch. I was told it was laced with grain alcohol. I don't remember how many drinks I had, and my recollections of the actual events of the rest of the night are fuzzy, but I do remember this much: When I was drinking, I was okay. I understood. Everything made sense. I could dance, talk, and enjoy being in my own skin. It was as if I had been an unfinished jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing; as soon as I took a drink, the last piece instantly and effortlessly snapped into place.
p. 320
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
At this stage, the difficulties of trying to deal rightly with God by ourselves are twofold. Though we may at first be startled to realize that God knows all about us, we are apt to get used to that quite quickly. Somehow, being alone with God doesn't seem as embarrassing as facing up to another person. Until we actually sit down and talk aloud about what we have so long hidden, our willingness to clean house is still largely theoretical. When we are honest with another person, it confirms that we have been honest with ourselves and with God.
pp. 59-60
************************************************** *********
Without memory, there is no healing. Without forgiveness, there is no
future."
"A quiet hour is worth more to you than anything you can do in it."
--Sara One Jewess
"If you want happiness for a lifetime, help someone else"
--Chinese Proverb
A good exercise for the heart is to bend down and help another up.
He who divides and shares is left with the best share.
--Mexican Proverb
"Be kind and merciful. Let no one ever come to you without coming
away better and happier."
--Mother Theresa
If your eyes are blinded with your worries, you cannot see the beauty
of the sunset.
--Krishnamurti
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
HEAVEN
"If you're not allowed to laugh
in heaven, I don't want to go
there."
-- Martin Luther
When I was a practicing alcoholic, I imagined heaven to be a dull
formal place, rather like a never-ending cathedral. Beautiful, but
serious. My pain and guilt were so great that I rarely laughed, and
when I did it was usually inappropriate and violent: I laughed at
others!
Today heaven is associated with recovery. It is a place of joy,
acceptance and forgiveness. A place where people can be themselves
and where variety abounds. Christians play with people from other
religions -- and the atheists make the music! The laughter of "peace"
abounds. I am "at one" with my Father and all my brothers and sisters.
I am home!
God of Love, when I hear the sound of laughter here on earth, I think
what joy awaits me in heaven.
************************************************** *********
"Happy are the people to whom such blessing fall; happy are the
people whose God is the Lord."
Psalm 144:15
"If anyone wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up
his cross, and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save
his life shall lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake shall find it."
Matthew 16:24-25
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Envision the joy of victory when you are faced with troubles and you will
clearly see what direction you must take. Lord, with You my storm will
pass and I will grow stronger as I grow closer to You.
Take heart in the beauty of your life because God loves, helps, fights and
wins. Lord, I will never fear because nothing can triumph over Your Will.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Keeping The Gift
"Life takes on a new meaning when we open ourselves to this gift."
Basic Text, p.102
Neglecting our recovery is like neglecting any other gift we've been given. Suppose someone gave you a new car. Would you let it sit in the driveway until the tires rotted? Would you just drive it, ignoring routine maintenance, until it expired on the road? Of course not! You would go to great lengths to maintain the condition of such a valuable gift.
Recovery is also a gift, and we have to care for it if we want to keep it. While our recovery doesn't come with an extended warranty, there is a routine maintenance schedule. This maintenance includes regular meeting attendance and various forms of service. We'll have to do some daily cleaning - our Tenth Step - and, once in a while, a major Fourth Step overhaul will be required. But if we maintain the gift of recovery, thanking the Giver each day, it will continue.
The gift of recovery is one that grows with the giving. Unless we give it away, we can't keep it. But in sharing our recovery with others, we come to value it all the more.
Just for today: My recovery is a gift, and I want to keep it. I'll do the required maintenance, and I'll share my recovery with others.
pg. 276
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Kindness and intelligence don't always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison
Being human means we'll have hard times along with pleasant ones. Whether with friends, at school, or at home, we'll find reasons for sadness or anger as easily as for laughter. In every part of our lives, we're offered just what we need for growth.
Being the best we know how to be doesn't mean we'll escape confusion or pain. Through the troubling times we learn to trust in a Higher Power; we learn patience; we learn to let go and let God decide outcomes. The troubling times offer us growth and serenity, our keys to happiness.
What hidden gifts will I find in today's troubles?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Time never challenged the Indian or worked against him. Time was for silently marking the passing of the seasons. It was a thing to be enjoyed. --Tim Giago
We have a choice as to how we view the passage of time. We can look at it as a gift to be enjoyed, marking the transitions and cycles of life. Or we can think of time as a long, thin string of pressures and frustrations - specific minutes and hours that we try to speed up or slow down. Our relationship to time is a very important part of our recovery.
We are learning to live in the present, one day at a time. We are letting go of the past. The future we place in trust to our Higher Power. Time doesn't work against us or challenge us, it just flows. This day need not be painless or close to paradise for us to live in the present moment. Being aware of our lives without struggling against time makes the day rich and full of meaning.
Today, rather than wrestling with time, I will be aware of my experiences and let time flow.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Anger conquers when unresolved. --Anonymous
Emotions need recognition. But not only attention; they also need acceptance as powerful dimensions of who we are. Their influence over who we are capable of becoming is mighty.
Respectful attention and willing acceptance of our emotions, whether fear or anger or hateful jealousy, takes away their sting. We can prevent them from growing larger than they are. Like a child who screams and misbehaves more and more fiercely until attention is won, our emotions grow larger and more intense the longer we deny their existence.
Our emotions bless us, in reality. They enrich our experiences. They serve as guideposts on the road we're traveling. How we "feel" at any single moment flags the level of our security, how close we are to our higher power, the level of our commitment to the program. They serve us well when acknowledged. On the other hand, when ignored or denied, they can immobilize us, even defeat us.
My feelings frequent my being, always. They steer my behavior. They reflect my attitudes. They hint at my closeness to God.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Trusting Ourselves
Many of us believed that heeding the words of God or our Higher Power meant following rigid rules, an instruction booklet for life.
Many of us now believe differently. The rigid rules, the endless instructions, the exhortation to perfection, are not the words our Higher Power whispers.
The words of God are often those still, small words we call intuition or instinct, leading and guiding us forward.
We are free to be whom we are, to listen to and trust ourselves. We are free to listen to the gentle, loving words of a Higher Power, words whispered to and through each of us.
Today, help me, God; to let go of shame based rigid rules. I will choose the freedom of loving, listening, and trusting.
Today I will find someone who needs my love. Today I will share my strength, hope and experience so that someone else can be reborn. --Ruth Fishel
*****
Journey to the Heart
Embrace Change
You don't have to fear change. What you need to fear, a friend once told me, is things remaining the same. When that happens, life has stopped.
Life is an evolution. Your life is constantly, quietly evolving each moment into something new, something different, something that adds gracefully, beautifully, and perfectly to what was. You can trust that process with all its insights, clarity, confusion, and emotions. You can trust that process with its peace, joy, laughter, and its side trips.
Learn to honor and love the process of continual evolution and transformation. It's how things grow. It's how you grow. It's how life is.
Learn to embrace change.
*****
more language of letting go
Be uniquely you
We will discover the nature of our particular genius when we stop trying to conform to our own or to other peoples' models, learn to be ourselves, and allow our natural channels to open.
--Shakti Gawain
We have much in common with each other. And recovery, growth, and change are strengthened by honoring these similarities. But each of us is unique. We each have our own strengths, weaknesses, gifts, vulnerabilities-- our own personalities.
The purpose of spiritual growth is not to eliminate the personality. It is to refine and enhance it, and allow each of us to express ourselves creatively.
We are not meant to be just like anyone else. Comparison will leave us uncomfortable, either on the side of pride or of inadequacy.
You are you. The wonder of life comes in finding your own rhythm to the dance, your own way of seeing the world, your own brush stroke, phrase, or special combination.
There is an old story about a writer who goes to his teacher and says, "Teacher, all the stories have already been told. There is no need for me to write. Everything that needs to be said has already been written."
"It's true that there are no new stories," the teacher said. "The universal lessons have been taking place for a long, long time. And the same themes have influenced humanity since time began. But no one sees that story through your eyes. And no one else in the world will tell that story exactly the way you will. Now return to your desk, pick up your pen, and tell the world what you see."
The beauty of the world lies both in our differences and in our similarities. Allow the beauty that is channeled through you to be flavored with your own special perspective on the world.
There's a difference between ego and personality. Drop the ego. Let your personality, in all its glories and foibles and eccentricities, come shining through.
Respect how much you have in common with other people.
Then be uniquely you.
God, thank you for making me unique.
*****
Cultivating Safety
From the Overcoming Fear On-line Course by Debbie Ford
The following is an excerpt from the "Overcoming Fear" on-line course. If you would like to take the entire course, click here.
We can control the quality of our lives if we are willing to face our fears rather than burying, suppressing or avoiding them. Confronting our deepest fears, our terror, is a way out of the agony of our ongoing stories and into the glorious world of empowerment. Almost all of us were terrorized in some way when we were young. For you, maybe it was when you were bullied in school or when one of your siblings locked you in the closet. Something happened to activate the feeling of fear, of sheer terror, and at some point you rejected your fear and made a decision that this was a bad way to feel because you associated it with some negative event.
Now it is time for you to be the adult and take charge of your internal world. You have to be the one to take back your power, even if you're scared. When you are in fear, it's because you believe in that darkness more than you believe in the light. You might believe that if you do enough, read enough, pray enough or chat enough, you can obliterate your fear, but I am here to tell you that it's impossible to make the fear happy. You might think that if you listen to it long enough, it will go away. But it won't. You must confront it. You must take back your power. You say, "Yes Debbie but how?" Well here is the antidote for your fear: LOVE IT. Don't try to discard or rid yourself of your fear, because you probably aren't strong enough. But what you can do is bring the light to the darkness. That light is love. When faced with your fear, you can ask yourself, "How can I love myself even when I'm in the middle of my fear? You can turn around and face your fear. You can stop te! rrorizing yourself further for being scared and instead find out how old that fear is. You can ask yourself, "How many years, months, weeks, days and minutes have I been terrorized by the same thing?" Count it out and write it down. And then find some sweet compassion for the kid in you that is scared to death.
The greatest way to take on your fear is to create safety for yourself. Safety is the key to courage. And action is your way of showing yourself that you are safe and that you can take care of yourself.. For example, if you hold a secret fear that you could become a bag lady but have no financial plan, then you're going to be continuously terrorized. Get a money mentor. Find out how much money you need to put away and then start on that path. If you're afraid that someone is going to attack you, get trained in self-defense. If you're afraid your business partner is going to extort you, have an agreement drawn up that protects you. If you're fearful that your partner is going to leave you, find out what you would need to do to know that, even if they did leave, you're a desirable and extraordinary person? If you're scared that you're going to pass your limiting beliefs and issues on to your kids, what transformational class would you have to attend or what coaching could you ! participate in to ensure that you're giving them your highest? If you're scared you're going to get sick, what measures could you take right now to nurture your well-being? Add tai chi or yoga classes to your weekly schedule and seek out an integrative healthcare practitioner (such as an acupuncturist or body worker) to mitigate stress and keep your body in balance.
Since ultimately you are the one that can make you feel safe, what environment do you need to create around you? What support structures could you put in place? Ask yourself where in your life are you not protecting yourself - not taking care of yourself. What subtle adjustment or quantum step can you take this week to put in a measure of safety somewhere in your life where you are fearful? Whether it's adding antioxidants to your daily regimen, putting money in savings, having an alarm system installed, getting insurance, or praying to the divine, do what it takes to ease your heart and mind. Make a commitment this week. Find an area where you have fear and take it on! Published with permission from Daily OM
*****
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
For a considerable period of time after I reached The Program, I let things I couldn’t do keep me from doing the things I could. If I was bothered by what a speaker or other people said, I retreated, sulking, into my shell. Now, instead of being annoyed or defensive when someone strikes a raw nerve, I try to welcome it — because it allows me to work on my attitudes and perceptions of God, self, other people, and my life situation. We may no longer have active addiction, but we all certainly have an active thinking problem. Am I willing to grow — and grow up?
Today I Pray
May God give me courage to test my new wings — even a feather at a time. May I not wait to be entirely whole before I re-enter the world of everyday opportunity, for recovery is ongoing and growth comes through challenges. May I no longer make desperate stabs at perfection, but keep my aims in sight and develop as I live — a day at a time.
Today I Will Remember
Things I can’t do should not get in the way of things I can.
************************************************** *****************
Food For Thought
Scales
During our dieting days, we probably spent much time getting on and off the scales. In OA, we are advised not to weigh more than once a month. Though we want to get rid of excess weight, we do not want to be obsessed with pounds and ounces. This program involves much more than weight control, and to make the scales our ultimate judge is to miss the mark.
If we are honestly abstaining from compulsive overeating and working our program, we will lose weight. The rate of loss will vary from person to person and from week to week. Even, and especially, when the scale registers what we want it to register, we continue to honestly abstain and work the OA program.
In OA, we are more concerned with the progress we make in controlling our disease than we are with our specific weight on any particular day. If our illness is under control, weight control will follow. Scales are useful for measuring physical progress, but they are not a god.
May I use the scales wisely?
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
ACCEPTANCE
"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.
I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed
in the world as what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes."
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous
Dissatisfaction has been part of my disease and it played a significant role in bringing me to recovery. It is the human condition to dislike where we are. Like many of us, I used to think that only some mystical, non-existent person, place, thing or situation would make me happy. If only my spouse loved me as I want to be loved; if only the boss would see and appreciate my contributions; or if only my house and children were perfect. I sat year after year speculating and fantasizing my life away.
The Serenity Prayer tells me to ask God for the wisdom to know His will for me. I lived in darkness and despair until I learned that my Higher Power is here. He is in charge. I must, through prayer and meditation, seek God's will and do the next right thing. I need to cooperate with my Higher Power to change my attitude. To that end, I do the footwork just for today.
One day at a time...
I will seek and accept God's will for my life.
~ Danny
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: 'Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.' Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcholism
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The slogans we are learning are like combinations to unlock something of value and make it accessible to our mind. Even if we don't like the slogans hanging on the walls and repeated at meetings, we at least consider the possibility of opening our mind to it's intent.
What situation, God, can I find this hour where a slogan will lead me to the solution?
I Will Be Me
I will be me, today. One thing I never seem to do well at, is trying to be someone else. I can imitate and learn from others, but I cannot be them. Only they know how to do that, it's a natural outgrowth of all that they have experienced in life, of all they are. That's the bad news. The good news is no one can be me as well as me. Being me builds on who I already am. It's exercise for my personality and my spirit. If I allow myself to actualize my own unique gifts and visions they will have originality to them, a freshness.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'When adversity strikes, my message is always, Even this will pass...and better days than we have ever experienced will come.' ~Dr. Norman Vincent Peale
I can't run from God, so I let God run me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
God speaks through people, don't worry about which ones.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will find someone who needs my love.
Today I will share my strength, hope and experience so that someone else can be reborn.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
'Analysis' has 'anal' in there. That tells me something. - Trip S.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 23, 2018 8:31:43 GMT -5
September 23
Daily Reflections
"I WAS AN EXCEPTION"
He [Bill W.] said to me, gently and simply, "Do you
think that you are one of us?"
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 413
During my drinking life I was convinced I was an exception.
I thought I was beyond petty requirements and had the right
to be excused. I never realized that the dark counterbalance
of my attitude was the constant feeling that I did not
"belong." At first, in A.A., I identified with others only
as an alcoholic. What a wonderful awakening for me it has
been to realize that, if human beings were doing the best
they could, then so was I! All of the pains, confusions and
joys they feel are not exceptional, but part of my life,
just as much as anybody's.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Step Twelve is, "Having had a spiritual awakening as
the result of these steps, we tried to carry this
message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles
in all our affairs." Note that the basis of our
effectiveness in carrying the message to others is the
reality of our own spiritual awakening. If we have not
changed, we cannot be used to change others. To keep
this program, we must pass it on to others. We cannot
keep it for ourselves. We may lose it unless we give it
away. It cannot flow into us and stop; it must continue
to flow into us as it flows out to others.
Meditation For The Day
"Draw nigh unto God and He will draw nigh unto you."
When you are faced with a problem beyond your strength,
you must turn to God by an act of faith. It is that turning
to God in each trying situation that you must cultivate.
The turning may be one of glad thankfulness for God's grace
in you life. Or your appeal to God may be a prayerful
claiming of His strength to face a situation and finding
that you have it when the time comes. Not only the power to
face trials, but also the comfort and joy of God's nearness
and companionship are yours for the asking.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to draw near to God each day in prayer.
I pray that I may feel His nearness and His strength in my life.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Neither Dependence nor Self-Sufficiency, p.265
When we insisted, like infants, that people protect and take care of
us or that the world owed us a living, then the result was
unfortunate. The people we most loved often pushed us aside or
perhaps deserted us entirely. Our disillusionment was hard to bear.
We failed to see that, though adult in years, we were still behaving
childishly, trying to turn everybody--friends, wives, husbands, even
the world itself--into protective parents. We refused to learn that
overdependence upon people is unsuccessful because all people
are fallible, and even the best of them will sometimes let us
down, especially when our demands for attention become
unreasonable.
********************************
We are now on a different basis: the basis of trusting and relying
upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. Just to
the extent that we do as we think He would have us do, and humbly
rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity.
1. 12 & 12, p.115
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.68
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
When resentment Returns
Inventory
It’s surprising and even humiliating to find an old resentment
flaring up, sometimes years after we thought it had been put to rest.
When that happens, we wonder how thorough we really were in
releasing the resentment in the first place.
The secret of handling this problem is to turn the old resentment
over to our Higher Power without wasting time wondering why it
came up again. We need to deal with it as if it were a brand-new
problem; and in a sense, it is.
As for questioning our past sincerity, that too is a waste of time.
We are always trying to do our best with the understanding we
have for each day. Being too hard on us does not make it easier
to practice our program. Resentments can and do return, but they
don't have to destroy us.
I'll realize today that I'm always susceptible to any of my ongoing problems,
including resentment. Fortunately, I have my program for dealing with
them when they occur.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
. . . he who finds himself loses his misery. Matthew Arnold
We have lost a lot of misery. In it’s place inside us, a spirit grows. . .
as love is added.
Especially self-love. In our illness, we came to hate ourselves. It was
really our illness we hated. We couldn’t find ourselves. All we saw was
what others saw---our illness.
In recovery, we’ve found ourselves again. We’ve found we’re good people.
We’ve also come to love the world around us. We see we have something
to offer this world---ourselves.
Why? Because we have found ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: I’m so glad to be alive. At times life hurts, but, in living,
I found You. Thank-you Higher Power. I pray that we may always be close.
Action for the Day: I will list ten great things I’ve discovered about myself
in recovery.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Who will I be today? The "Cosmopolitan" woman, the little girl, the scholar,
the mother? Who will I be to answer the needs of others, and yet answer the
needs of me? --Deidra Sarault
We wear many hats. One aspect of our maturity is our ability to balance our
roles. It's often quite difficult to do so; however, the program offers us many
tools for balancing our lives.
Fulfilling some of the needs of significant others in our lives brings us joy. Our
own needs must be given priority, though. We cannot give away what we don't
have, and we have nothing unless we give sincere attention and love to ourselves.
In years gone by, we may have taken too little care of others, or we overdid it.
In either case, we probably neglected ourselves. Most of us starved ourselves
spiritually, many of us emotionally, a few physically. We were all too often
"all-or-nothing" women.
Today we're aware of our choices. We've been making a number of good ones
lately: We're abstinent. We're living the Steps. And we're choosing how to
spend our time, and what to do with our lives. But no choice will turn out
very well if we haven't taken care of ourselves.
I will center on myself. I will nurture the maturing woman within and then reach out.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
There will be other profound changes in the household. Liquor incapacitated father for so many years that mother became head of the house. She met these responsibilities gallantly. By force of circumstances, she was often obliged to treat father as a sick or wayward child. Even when he wanted to assert himself he could not, for his drinking placed him constantly in the wrong. Mother made all the plans and gave the directions. When sober, father usually obeyed. Thus mother, through no fault of her own, became accustomed to wearing the family trousers. Father, coming suddenly to life again, often begins to assert himself. This means trouble, unless the family watches for these tendencies in each other and comes to a friendly agreement about them.
pp. 130-131
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I don't remember getting home that night, and I woke up next morning completely dressed and in full makeup. I was sick as a dog, but I managed to crawl into the shower and prepare for my first college class. I sat through the entire class pleading with my eyes to the professor to let us out early. He kept us to the bell, and when it rang, I flew into the women's room, crashed into the first stall, and threw everything up.
p. 320
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
The second difficulty is this: what comes to us alone may be garbled by our own rationalization and wishful thinking. The benefit of talking to another person is that we can get his direct comment and counsel on our situation, and there can be no doubt in our minds what that advice is. Going it alone in spiritual matters is dangerous. How many times have we heard well-intentioned people claim the guidance of God when it was all too plain that they were sorely mistaken. Lacking both practice and humility, they had deluded themselves and were able to justify the most arrant nonsense on the ground that this was what God had told them. It is worth noting that people of very high spiritual development almost always insist on checking with friends or spiritual advisers the guidance they feel they have received from God. Surely, then, a novice ought not lay himself open to the chance of making foolish, perhaps tragic, blunders in this fashion. While the comment or advice of others may be by no means infallible, it is likely to be far more specific than any direct guidance we may receive while we are still so inexperienced in establishing contact with a Power greater than ourselves.
p. 60
************************************************** *********
Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its troubles, it empties today of
its strength.
--Soberbyker
"He who would have fruit must climb the tree."
--Thomas Fuller
"Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend."
--Theophrastus
"The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which
includes not only others but ourselves as well."
--Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
"If one could only learn to appreciate the little things...
A song that takes you away, for there are those who cannot hear.
The beauty of a sunset, for there are those who cannot see.
The warmth and safety of your home, for there are those who are homeless.
Time spent with good friends for there are those who are lonely.
A walk along the beach for there are those who cannot walk.
The little things are what life is all about.
Search your soul and learn to appreciate."
--Shadi Souferian
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LOVE
"Take away love and our earth
is a tomb."
-- Robert Browning
Spirituality is essentially love. It is the love that suffers and grows in
the acceptance of my compulsive and obsessive behavior. It is the love
that requires a knowledge of "self" in order to give understanding and
respect to others. Spirituality is that loving vulnerability that creates
healing in recovery. It provides meaning to life and relationships.
The world is a creative place, and we will only find happiness when we
begin to create. God has created us to take and make -- give and
receive. With the suffering, loneliness, struggle and acceptance comes
a love that is real and alive.
Teach me to live in life and not merely exist.
************************************************** *********
Let us go to His dwelling place; let us worship at His footstool.
Psalm 132:7
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things
there is no law."
Galatians 5:22-23
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Your happiness is happening right now unless you chose not to see it.
Lord, I trust in Your presence and therefore I am always able to see
You work in my life.
Everything we need to deal with life's problems lies within us. Our trials
are tests to see if we can discover the solution. Lord, I call out Your name
when I face my difficulties and together we will overcome them.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Dealing With Gossip
"In accordance with the principles of recovery, we try not to judge, stereotype, or moralize with each other."
Basic Text, p.11
Let's face it: In Narcotics Anonymous, we live in a glass house of sorts. Our fellow members know more about our personal lives than anyone has ever known before. They know who we spend our time with, where we work, what step we're on, how many children we have, and so forth. And what our fellow members don't know, they will probably imagine.
We may be unhappy when others gossip about us. But if we withdraw from the fellowship and isolate ourselves to avoid gossip, we also rob ourselves of the love, friendship, and unparalleled experience with recovery that our fellow members have to offer. A better way to deal with gossip is to simply accept the way things are and the way we are, and live our lives according to principles. The more secure we become with our personal program, the decisions we make, and the guidance we receive from a loving God, the less the opinions of others will concern us.
Just for today: I am committed to being involved in the NA Fellowship. The opinions of others will not affect my commitment to recovery.
pg. 277
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or the life of another. --Helen Keller
It is a great loss when we underestimate the importance of our efforts in the life of another. One man, who had to spend some time in a hospital, waited day after day to receive a card or a telephone call from those who cared. Some people, who he expected to call or write, did not. Others, who the man had not felt close to, and whom he did not expect to hear from, surprised him with their concern. He came to place greater value on those who had cared enough to call or send a card.
A little act, the best we have at that moment, makes a big difference to the person on the other end. Knowing this helps us make sure that all our acts, even the smallest, are as good as we can make them, because they all make a difference.
What small acts of those around me have made a difference to me?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Granted that I must die, how shall I live? --Michael Novak
On our recovery path we sometimes fall into a hole. As we get more in touch with ourselves and with reality, we might be overwhelmed, frightened, or depressed. Many men have asked, "How can it be that I live life with such struggle and hard work only to die in the end?" In recovery we no longer have our anesthetic, our drug of choice, our excesses and controlling behaviors to dull this painful awareness.
Growing as a human being means becoming more aware of these dark truths and not being paralyzed by them. We accept death and choose life. That means we live fully in the present. We choose relationships with others. We appreciate the beauty of creation and seek to know the will of God. In recovery, we choose to live this day fully, in contact with friends and loved ones, appreciating the beauty around us, and helping those we can.
God, help me to tune in to your truth, and to be a living part of your constant creative process.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Who will I be today? The "Cosmopolitan" woman, the little girl, the scholar, the mother? Who will I be to answer the needs of others, and yet answer the needs of me? --Deidra Sarault
We wear many hats. One aspect of our maturity is our ability to balance our roles. It's often quite difficult to do so; however, the program offers us many tools for balancing our lives.
Fulfilling some of the needs of significant others in our lives brings us joy. Our own needs must be given priority, though. We cannot give away what we don't have, and we have nothing unless we give sincere attention and love to ourselves.
In years gone by, we may have taken too little care of others, or we overdid it. In either case, we probably neglected ourselves. Most of us starved ourselves spiritually, many of us emotionally, a few physically. We were all too often "all-or-nothing" women.
Today we're aware of our choices. We've been making a number of good ones lately: We're abstinent. We're living the Steps. And we're choosing how to spend our time, and what to do with our lives. But no choice will turn out very well if we haven't taken care of ourselves.
I will center on myself. I will nurture the maturing woman within and then reach out.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Tolerance
Practice tolerance.
Tolerate our quirks, our feelings, our reactions, our peculiarities, and our humanness. Tolerate our ups and downs, our resistance to change, and our struggling and sometimes awkward nature.
Tolerate our fears, our mistakes, our natural tendency to duck from problems, and pain. Tolerate our hesitancy to get close, expose ourselves, and be vulnerable.
Tolerate our need to occasionally feel superior, to sometimes feel ashamed, and to occasionally share love as an equal. Tolerate the way we progress - a few steps forward, and a couple back.
Tolerate our instinctive desire to control and how we reluctantly learn to practice detachment. Tolerate the way we say we want love, and then sometimes push others away. Tolerate our tendency to get obsessive, forget to trust God, and occasionally get stuck.
Some things we do not tolerate. Do not tolerate abusive or destructive behaviors toward others or ourselves.
Practice healthy, loving tolerance of ourselves, said one man. When we do, we'll learn tolerance for others. Then, take it one step further. learn that all the humanness we're tolerating is what makes ourselves and others beautiful.
Today, I will be tolerant of myself. From that, I will learn appropriate tolerance of others.
Today I am really listening to the messages that I tell myself. Today I want to feel good. Today I'm changing on my negative messages for positive ones. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Listen to Your Body
Listen to Your Body
The call to exercise doesn't come from gyms, health clubs, physical education directors, or diet books. The call to exercise comes from our bodies, from our souls.
I fought exercise for a long, long time. During the 1980s, when it became popular, I managed to resist. It's boring, hard, and unpleasant, I thought. It won't work for me.
When my daughter finally dragged me to the local health club, I felt like I was in a foreign country. I rode a bike for a few minutes, then wobbled to the water fountain looking like a penguin, legs numb, heart pounding, muscles aching, sweat pouring down my back. My daughter looked at me and firmly said, "You let yourself get in this shape. Now it's time to get out."
It took a while to understand that when I did some simple workouts, I felt better, not worse. The cycle happened naturally, over many months. But my body had said loudly, It's time.
The world is full of ways to move around, work our bodies, and exercise. Park the car in the space furthest from the store and walk. Carry groceries one bag at a time from the car to the house. Carry your own luggage. Go for a walk. Go for a run. Do sit-ups. Learn yoga. Take up line dancing.
Find some way to move your body that feels good for you. Start doing it, even if it doesn't feel good at first. Do it until you can hear your body, hear what it wants, hear what it needs, hear what feels good to it. Do it until you can hear your body tell you how and when it wants to move.
The better you can hear your body, the more clearly you will hear your soul.
*****
more language of letting go
You have the power
If you see Buddha, kill him.
--Zen koan
For the first several hundred years after the Buddha died, there were no images of him. Only his dharma, or teachings, were passed on from generation to generation. Eventually, however, the people wanted an image to remind them of their ideal, and that's when and how Buddha statues came to be.
The good thing about having statues of Buddha is they remind followers of the ideals they're striving for in their lives. The difficult thing about Buddha statues is that people may be tempted to idolize the statue, and forget to seek the state of consciousness the Buddha represented.
It's easy for us to idolize our mentors and teachers, the people who encourage and help us to grow. It can be easy to look around us and think others have the key to enlightenment, success, joy.
Stop idolizing other people.
Look in the mirror.
You have everything you need to learn your lessons, grow, achieve success. You have all the courage you need to fail, then try again. You have everything you need, within you, to live and follow your own path with heart.
Not only are you right where you need to be, but you can get wherever you want to go from here. And you and I have all the power we need to learn the lessons we came here to learn.
God, teach me that all I need is within me.
******
Accepting and Releasing Emotions
Denying Your Feelings
Dealing with powerful emotions can be challenging, especially when we are going through chaotic, sad, or cruel experiences in our lives. Often, it can seem like we have only two options for dealing with our feelings so they don’t become too overwhelming. We may let our feelings out in an immediate and visceral way, or we may bottle them up by suppressing our emotions inside our bodies. Most people make the second choice, repressing their feelings in an attempt to deny them. The truth is that there are many positive ways to deal with emotions, and experiencing your negative feelings doesn’t have to constitute a negative experience. Denying your feelings is not only unhealthy for the mind and the body, but it may also rob you of valuable information you could be learning about yourself and your life. Suppressing your emotions can even impede your short-term memory. Acknowledging your feelings can help you better understand them and help you recover naturally from change, stres! s, and grief.
If you find that facing your feelings head on is proving too difficult during times of emotional distress, you may want to explore alternative ways of expressing them. Otherwise, the emotions you deny could morph into unconscious anger or self-hatred. Expressing your thoughts to friends or family can be helpful. If you don’t feel ready to share them, try giving them words by writing down what you are feeling. Give whatever you are feeling simple words like “livid” or “angry” or “excited” You can also funnel your feelings into a creative outlet, physical exercise, or chores. Even just accepting and speaking your feelings out loud to yourself can be a healing release. In releasing intense emotions, it is most beneficial to acknowledge the feelings, allow yourself to feel them, and let the feelings go. Those who are willing to experience and release their feelings without judgment also find that their lives become less stressful. Breathing deeply, going for a long walk, or doi! ng a constructive task can help you respond to your feelings in a healthy way.
While burying negative or uncomfortable feelings can numb the pain, it also may inevitably dull your ability to experience your more positive and pleasurable feelings. You may find yourself afraid to open up in the future for fear of getting hurt. The feelings we deny aren’t limited to anger and sadness. Suppressing our happiness or excitement can be just as unhealthy. In learning how to express your intense emotions in a healthy way, you are giving yourself the freedom to fully experience the more joyful emotions that come with being alive. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
On studying the Twelve Steps, many of the first members of The Program exclaimed, “What an order! I can’t go through with it.” “Do not be discouraged,” we’re told at the meeting after meeting. “No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.” Can I believe, in the words of Browning, that my business is not to remake myself, but to make the absolute best of what God made…?
Today I Pray
Even if I am an old hand at The Program, may I not forget that the Twelve Steps do not represent an achievement that can be checked off my “things to do” list. Instead, they are a striving for an ideal, a guide to getting there. May I keep my mind open to deepening interpretations of these principles.
Today I Will Remember
Progress rather than perfection.
******************************
One More Day
Physical courage, which despises all danger, will make brave in one way; and moral courage, which despises all opinion, will make a man brave in another. The former would seem most necessary for the camp; the latter for the council; but to constitute a great man, both are necessary.
– C. C. Colton
We are blessed to have many kinds of courage. We just never expected to have them all tested during a course of several years! Our physical courage increases every time we face a new situation or a different medical problem. Although we’re not grateful for the illness itself, it has provided the challenges which have prompted greater courage in us. We’ve also had to look more closely at our values and had to become stronger in protecting them. We’re more conscious of the choices we make and how we make them, and we’re grateful for that awareness.
I will continue to make healthy, moral choices.
************************************************** ****************
Food For Thought
Positive Leads
As our serenity grows, the clamor and confusion inside our heads die down. Instead of being pulled in many different directions and uncertain of which way to turn, we gradually discern the positive voice that leads us forward. Rather than trying to analyze all possible alternatives intellectually, we gain the confidence to choose the positive way without agonizing indecision.
To worry and speculate about the roads not taken is counter productive and wasteful of our energies. We pray that we may know the will of our Higher Power for us, and then we act according to the best of our knowledge. The more we practice listening to the still, small voice within, the more positive direction we will receive.
The mental calmness which we experience as we abstain from compulsive overeating clears away our former confusion. We may make mistakes, but as long as we can admit them and stay in contact with our Higher Power, we will continue to follow His positive leads.
Keep me on Your positive path.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
EMOTIONS
“A life lacking the emotional upheavals of depression and despair,
fear and anxiety, grief and sadness, anger and the agony of forgiving,
confusion and doubt, criticism and rejection,
will not only be useless to ourselves, it will be useless to others.”
Scott Peck
Because I have always thought of myself as such an ordinary person, as life moved along I was surprised to find so many emotional events happening in it. I have had severe periods of depression and despair; I have known fear, anxiety, anger and doubt. I have wrestled with grief and known the agony of rejection. I have been subjected to criticism and experienced firsthand the difficulty of forgiving those whom I once thought I would never be able to forgive.
What I have learned about life and recovery is that no one is ordinary, that everyone experiences emotions of all kinds, and what is important is that each of these upheavals are instructive and not wasted.
Whereas once I would block my feelings, I now allow myself to feel them. Instead of sweeping my emotions under a rug, I express them. Rather than blocking grief from my soul, I experience it ... then heal from it. When I am rejected, I try to move on by exploring the reasons why.
One day at a time...
I will turn my negative emotions into positive ones by transforming them into useful learning experiences both for myself and for others.
~ Mari ~
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable adn discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks - drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is little hope of his recovery. - Pg. xxviii-xxix - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Even though you are a unique human being, you are not so unique that your recovery is any different then thousands before you. If you think we don't understand, then your disease is playing tricks on you because it doesn't want you getting well with us.
I name three reasons why I am just like every other chemical dependent seeking recovery.
Endless Opportunities
I can start over each day. I can start over each hour of each day. The universe is impersonal in that sense. It's always waiting for me to tell it what I want. Like attracts like. I tell the world what I want more of, by what I am thinking and feeling right now, right this minute. Today, every hour on the hour, I will allow myself to see something positive about my day. I'll let myself send out an order by my pleasant thoughts and feelings for more of the same. When I catch myself heading down a negative path I'll stop and consciously observe what is going through my mind. Life is full of chances and so is my day. I can start it over any time I want to.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Courage is more complex than spontaneous reactions to traumatic events. It may take courage to rush into a burning building or jump in a river to save a life, but they are almost instinctual. Sharing your deep feelings might be an act of courage far beyond gallant feats.
My courage is my fear in action.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Your sponsor helped you up. Don't let them down.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am really listening to the messages that I tell myself.
Today I want to feel good.
Today I'm changing on my negative messages for positive ones.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I got side-tracked; it wasn't that I was born needing six drinks, just Twelve Steps. - Trip S.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 24, 2018 8:18:24 GMT -5
September 24
Daily Reflections
VIGILANCE
We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again:
"Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic." Commencing
to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short
time as bad as ever. If we are planning to stop drinking,
there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking
notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 33
Today I am an alcoholic. Tomorrow will be no different.
My alcoholism lives within me now and forever. I must
never forget what I am. Alcohol will surely kill me if
I fail to recognize and acknowledge my disease on a daily
basis. I am not playing a game in which a loss is a
temporary setback. I am dealing with my disease, for which
there is no cure, only daily acceptance and vigilance.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Let us continue with Step Twelve. We must practice these
principles in all our affairs. This part of the twelfth
step must not be overlooked. It is the carrying on of the
whole program. We do not just practice these principles in
regard to our drinking problem. We practice them in ALL our
affairs. We do not give one compartment of our lives to God
and keep the other compartments to ourselves. We give our
whole lives to God and we try to do His will in every respect.
"Herein lies our growth, herein lies all the promise of the
future, and ever-widening horizon." Do I carry the A.A.
principles with me wherever I go?
Meditation For The Day
"Lord, to whom shall we go but to Thee? Thou hast the words
of eternal life." The words of eternal life are the words
from God controlling your true being, controlling the real
spiritual you. They are the words from God which are heard
by you in your heart and mind when these are wide open to
His spirit. These are the words of eternal life which express
the true way you are to live. They say to you in the stillness
of your heart and mind and soul: "Do this and live."
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may follow the dictates of my conscience.
I pray that I may follow the inner urging of my soul.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Give Thanks, p.266
Though I still find it difficult to accept today's pain and anxiety
with any great degree of serenity--as those more advanced in the
spiritual life seem able to do--I can give thanks for present pain
nevertheless.
I find the willingness to do this by contemplating the lessons
learned from past suffering--lessons which have led to the
blessings I now enjoy. I can remember how the agonies of
alcoholism, the pain of rebellion and thwarted pride, have often
led me to God's grace, and so to a new freedom.
Grapevine, March 1962
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Willingness to listen
Willingness
Why is it that we'll accept information from some people but not from
others? Many people tried to advise us while we were drinking; why
would we listen only to recovering alcoholics?
We can't answer that question, except to say that most human beings are
willing to listen only to certain people at certain times. That's why business
organizations have to select sales people carefully; customers will respond to
some people, but not to others.
As we grow in sobriety, however, we develop the willingness to listen to people
we would have once avoided. We can find wonderful ideas in all sorts of places
and from all types of people. As we become more open-minded and willing, we
can listen more and learn more.
My prejudices and fears of the past kept me from listening to people who would
have helped me. I'll be more open-minded and willing today.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
To speak ill of others is a dishonest way of praising ourselves.--- Will Durant
Sometimes we say bad things about others. When we do this, it makes us look
bad too.
Our friends worry what we might say about them behind their backs. They’re
afraid to trust us. We become known as gossips.
The things we say about other people tell a lot about us. We are kind or unkind.
We gossip or we don’t. This doesn’t mean we have to say everyone is wonderful
all the time. As we work our program to see ourselves better, we begin to see other
people more clearly too. We see their strong points and their weak points. But we
can know these things without gossiping about them.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see others clearly, and in their best
light. Let me bring out the good in others.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list the people I’m closest to at work, school, and
home. I’ll think of how I talk about them to others. Am I kind?
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Woman must not be awed by that which has been built up around her; she
must reverence that woman in her which struggles for expression. --Margaret Sanger
Let us not stifle ourselves any longer. Let us dare to dream and realize those
dreams. Let us dare to take risks, having faith that to advance in any respect
implies taking risks. Fortunately, we have the support of the program and one
another to cushion the fall, if it should come. But more important, we have one
another's example to inspire us as we contemplate our own agenda for self-
expression.
Many of us for far too long passively watched others move forward. No
longer need we be passive observers, but the familiarity of no action, no
choice making, and irresponsibility, makes passivity attractive at times.
We must remember responsible choices, for only those make possible our
very special contributions.
Not every day do we awaken with the strength needed to "do our part."
But the strength will be available just as quickly as we call for it. Alone,
we are strugglers; however, we have a ready partnership, and it guarantees
us guidance, wisdom, and strength when we ask for it.
I have so much to offer other women. And I need another's example. Every
expression of my strength will boost another woman's strength. I will give.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
Drinking isolates most homes from the outside world. Father may have laid aside for years all normal activities—clubs, civic duties, sports. When he renews interest in such things, a feeling of jealousy may arise. The family may feel they hold a mortgage on dad, so big that no equity should be left for outsiders. Instead of developing new channels of activity for themselves, mother and children demand that he stay home and make up the deficiency.
p. 131
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
The insanity of the disease had already manifested itself. I recall thinking, as I knelt retching in the stall, that this was fantastic. Life was great; I had finally found the answer--alcohol! Yes, I overdid it the night before, but I was new to this game. I only had to learn how to drink right and I was set.
p. 320
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Our next problem will be to discover the person in whom we are to confide. Here we ought to take much care, remembering that prudence is a virtue which carries a high rating. Perhaps we shall need to share with this person facts about ourselves which no others ought to know. We shall want to speak with someone who is experienced, who not only has stayed dry but has been able to surmount other serious difficulties. Difficulties, perhaps, like our own. This person may turn out to be one's sponsor, but not necessarily so. If you have developed a high confidence in him, and his temperament and problems are close to your own, then such a choice will be good. Besides, your sponsor already has the advantage of knowing something about your case.
pp. 60-61
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"Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host."
--Maya Angelou
"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in
other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people
interested in you."
--Dale Carnegie
"Life is too short to spend your precious time trying to convince
a person who wants to live in gloom and doom otherwise. Give
lifting that person your best shot, but don't hang around long
enough for his or her bad attitude to pull you down. Instead, surround
yourself with optimistic people."
--Zig Ziglar
"He who asks a question is a fool for a minute; he who does not
remains a fool forever."
--Chinese Proverb
"It takes time to build a corporate work of art. It takes time to build a
life. And it takes time to develop and grow. So give yourself, your
enterprise, and your family the time they deserve and the time they
require."
--Jim Rohn
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
GOD
"God is not a cosmic bellboy."
-- Harry Emerson Fosdick
My understanding of God is within the context of freedom. God is
involved in His world but He allows it an autonomy. We are not
puppets on a string. When things begin to go wrong, God does not
interfere and make changes (usually) without our cooperation. God
reveals the extent of His love by allowing us a creative responsibility
in our lives.
For years I did not understand this. I thought that if I prayed enough,
He would answer all my prayers and come to my rescue. When He
didn't, I grew confused, angry and resentful. What was I doing wrong?
Where was God in my life? He didn't love me. Why wasn't God my
cosmic co-dependent?
Today I love his detachment. Today I grow in my freedom. Today I
cooperate with His miracle.
Lord, thank You for allowing me the freedom to fail.
************************************************** *********
"The spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives
me life."
Job 33:4
But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of
Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the
surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I
have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ
and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes
from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ - the
righteousness that comes from God and is by faith.
Philippians 3:7-9
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Daily Inspiration
Each of us has important gifts to share and things to do. Lord, may I be
valuable to those that need my value and do what I can to make a joyful difference.
Prayer may not always change a situation, but it will always change us.
Lord, I accept Your answers to my prayers because I know that they will
always be right and, in Your wisdom, best for me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
A Growing Concept Of God
"The only suggested guidelines are that this Power be loving, caring, and greater than ourselves. We don't have to be religious to accept this idea. The point is that we open our minds to believe."
Basic Text, p.24
In a lifelong process of coming to believe, our understanding of God will change. The understanding we have when new ill recovery will not be the same when we have a few months clean, nor will that understanding be the same when we have a few years clean.
Our initial understanding of a Power greater than ourselves will most likely be limited. That Power will keep us clean but, we may think, nothing more. We may hesitate to pray because we have placed conditions on what we will ask our Higher Power to do for us. "Oh, this stuff is so awful, even God couldn't do anything," we might say, or "God's got a lot of people to take care of. There's no time for me!"
But, as we grow in recovery, so will our understanding. We'll begin to see that the only limits to God's love and grace are those we impose by refusing to step out of the way. The loving God we come to believe in is infinite, and the power and love we find in our belief is shared by nearly every recovering addict around the world.
Just for today: The God I am coming to understand has a limitless capacity for love and care. I will trust that my God is bigger than any problem I may have.
pg. 278
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Notice the difference between what happens when a man says to himself, I have failed three times, and what happens when he says, I'm a failure. --S. I. Hayakawa
What happens to us when we call ourselves names like "failure" or "dummy"? We feel we're no good and never will be. We want to stop trying because we think we'll flub up again.
But what if we begin to use different words to describe the same results? It won't change the results, but it will change us. And it will change the way we see our actions and ourselves.
Just by changing the words we use we can feel better about ourselves. Saying, "I've failed three times," means we'll try again and again and again until we succeed. It means we know God doesn't make any failures or dummies. It means God is always with us, loving us and helping us, even when trying seems difficult.
What can I change my thinking about today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Life is painting a picture, not doing a sum. --Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
As we go about our activities, we will have a richer day when we think of ourselves as painting a picture instead of keeping score. Rather than woodenly completing a task, we might approach it as something that can be made interesting. Instead of driving to work or riding the bus only to reach our destination, we might think of this routine as part of the picture we paint today. When a friend makes a comment, we might think of it as another brush stroke in our painting and join in with him, rather than making a game or contest, which we must try to win.
Many of us men were taught that success means having the highest score. So we have become compulsively competitive - always trying to be right, always striving for more financial security, or always pushing ourselves for some new achievement. Success may not be coming out on top. When our lives are lived as rich and interesting pictures, we find our rewards are far deeper and more lasting.
May the picture I paint today be one I will carry with me and appreciate.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Woman must not be awed by that which has been built up around her; she must reverence that woman in her which struggles for expression. --Margaret Sanger
Let us not stifle ourselves any longer. Let us dare to dream and realize those dreams. Let us dare to take risks, having faith that to advance in any respect implies taking risks. Fortunately, we have the support of the program and one another to cushion the fall, if it should come. But more important, we have one another's example to inspire us as we contemplate our own agenda for self-expression.
Many of us for far too long passively watched others move forward. No longer need we be passive observers, but the familiarity of no action, no choice making, and irresponsibility, makes passivity attractive at times. We must remember responsible choices, for only those make possible our very special contributions.
Not every day do we awaken with the strength needed to "do our part." But the strength will be available just as quickly as we call for it. Alone, we are strugglers; however, we have a ready partnership, and it guarantees us guidance, wisdom, and strength when we ask for it.
I have so much to offer other women. And I need another's example. Every expression of my strength will boost another woman's strength. I will give.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Allowing Ourselves to be Needy
We can accept ourselves as people who have needs - the need for comfort, love, understanding, friendship, and healthy touch. We need positive reinforcement, someone to listen to us, someone to give to us. We are not weak for needing these things. These needs make us human and healthy. Getting our needs met - believing we deserve to have them met - makes us happy.
There are times, too, when in addition to our regular needs, we become particularly needy. At these times, we need more than we have to give out. That is okay too.
We can accept and incorporate our needs, and our needy side, into the whole of us. We can take responsibility for our needs. That doesn't make us weak or deficient. It doesn't mean we are not properly recovering, nor does it mean we're being dependent in an unhealthy way. It makes our needs, and our needy side, manageable. Our needs stop controlling us, and we gain control.
And, our needs begin to get met.
Today, I will accept my needs and my needy side. I believe I deserve to get my needs met, and I will allow that to happen.
Today I choose to do things for me that make me feel good about myself. Today is a perfect day to do something that I have been putting off. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey To The Heart
Your Healers Will Come to You
The people, the ideas, the resources you need to heal will come. They’ll appear on your path. Sometimes you’ll think it’s almost magical. Sometimes you’ll resist, saying, That can’t be right. It’s too easy. But your healers will come when you need them, when you’re ready.
You can trust the universe to send healers to you, but also trust yourself. Some of the healers and resources you encounter may not be right for you. Trust yourself to know what’s right. And remember, healers aren’t your source of power, they merely assist you in claiming your power. They come to help, to bring their gifts to you so that you can find yours.
Just as your healers will come to you, the people you are to bring healing to will appear in your path when it’s time, when it’s right. Trust yourself to make decisions regarding those with whom you share your gifts. Your heart will guide you if you listen.
Let yourself receive the healing you need. Let yourself share your healing gift with others. Find the balance that’s right for you. Trust yourself and the wisdom of your body, mind, and heart about what feels right, who feels right, and when it works for you.
*****
more language of letting go
Make conscious contact
God must become an activity in our consciousness.
--Joel S. Goldsmith
God is not separate from this beautiful world that he created. He is the creative force behind everything we do. He is the sunrise, the moonrise, the tides, and the eclipse. He created us from nothing, and we are special for no other reason than that we are.
When we let go of our separateness and welcome the fact that we are part of the universe, an amazing thing happens: we see we are part of the glory of the universe.
God is more than a great father standing judgementally above looking down with a mix of love and anger at his creation. We were created in God's image. We are a part of God, and a part of God's spirit resides in each of us.
We are a part of universal consciousness.
Today, whether you are feeling down and sad or joyous and free, take a moment and get in touch with the part of God that resides within you. You're a part of something bigger than all the petty victories and losses in your life. Enjoy your uniqueness; embrace your universality,too. Find comfort and humility in all that is.
See God in your life and in the world. Pray. Meditate.
Make conscious contact with your God.
God, help me make conscious contact with you today.
*****
Spreading Your Light
How You Affect Others Daily by Madisyn Taylor
We have the potential to affect others through all of our actions during our day whether we are aware of it or not.
As the pace and fullness of modern life serve to isolate us from one another, the contact we do share becomes vastly more significant. We unconsciously absorb each other’s energy, adopting the temperament of those with whom we share close quarters, and find ourselves changed after the briefest encounters. Everything we do or say has the potential to affect not only the individuals we live, work, and play with but also those we’ve just met. Though we may never know the impact we have had or the scope of our influence, accepting and understanding that our attitudes and choices will affect others can help us remember to conduct ourselves with grace at all times. When we seek always to be friendly, helpful, and responsive, we effortlessly create an atmosphere around ourselves that is both uplifting and inspiring.
Most people rarely give thought to the effect they have had or will have on others. When we take a few moments to contemplate how our individual modes of being affect the people we spend time with each day, we come one step closer to seeing ourselves through the eyes of others. By asking ourselves whether those we encounter walk away feeling appreciated, respected, and liked, we can heighten our awareness of the effect we ultimately have. Something as simple as a smile given freely can temporarily brighten a person’s entire world. Our value-driven conduct may inspire others to consider whether their own lives are reflective of their values. A word of advice can help others see life in an entirely new fashion. And small gestures of kindness can even prove to those embittered by the world that goodness still exists. By simply being ourselves, we influence other’s lives in both subtle and life-altering ways.
To ensure that the effect we have is positive, we must strive to stay true to ourselves while realizing that it is the demeanor we project and not the quality of our wondrous inner landscapes that people see. Thus, as we interact with others, how we behave can be as important as who we are. If we project our passion for life, our warmth, and our tolerance in our facial features, voice, and choice of words, every person who enters our circle of influence will leave our presence feeling at peace with themselves and with us. You never know whose life you are affecting, big or small. Try to remember this as you go out into the world each day. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Everybody wants to be somebody; nobody wants to grow.” Goethe.
I ask myself sometimes, as we all do; “Who am I?” “Where am I?” “Where am I going?” “What’s it all about?” The learning and growing process is usually slow. But eventually our seeking always brings a finding. What seem like great mysteries often turn out to be enshrined in complete simplicity. Have I accepted the fact that my willingness to grow is the essence of my spiritual development?
Today I Pray
God give me patience and the perseverance to keep on hoeing the long row, even when the end of it is out of sight. The principles of The Program are my almanac for growing, even more than the harvesting. The harvest will come, abundant enough to share, if I can stick to my gardentending.
Today I Will Remember
Getting there, not being there.
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One More Day
To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming is the only end of life.
– Robert Louis Stevenson
Mountain climbers, riverr rafters, and marathon racers all face the “challenge of a lifetime.” We have heard that phrase before, but may not have realized that our challenge of a lifetime would take a different form.
We all face challenges as we move through adulthood. In some instances — pain or illness, for example — we must face the obstacles placed in our way. We cannot choose to ignore or avoid them. One of our biggest challenges is that struggle to maintain a positive mental attitude. This is easier said than done when altered health patterns change lifestyles, but we can be on guard to thhink about “wellness” before “illness” and to remember we have been facing challenges all along.
I face challenges every day — some public, but many private. I Will try to do my personal best.
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Food For Thought
Accepting Where We Are
Wherever we are when we come to this program is where we begin. Some of us have further to go along the road to self-actualization than others. No one of us ever arrives in this life. There is always more work to be done.
Believing that our Higher Power has a plan for each of us, we accept the place where He has put us right now. We do not expect to stay in this place, but it is a necessary part of our growth and development. We cannot move on until we understand where we are now and how we got here.
Our Fourth Step inventory gives us an opportunity to examine past actions, which have led to our current situation. We may not like what we discover, but an honest appraisal of our weaknesses and faults as well as our strengths is preparation for constructive change. Accepting where we are frees us from morbid obsession with the past and enables us to move on into the future.
May I accept where I am as the best place for me to be today.
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One Day At A Time
~ The Future ~
When I look into the future, it's so bright it burns my eyes.
Oprah Winfrey
I receive the gift of abstinence one day at a time. I am relieved from the obsession to eat one day at a time. With the help of my Higher Power, I can live life on life's terms... one day at a time.
As my recovery builds and builds, I start to imagine all the possibilities for my life. Things I never had the confidence or emotional stability to pursue are options for me. Now that I am free from the despair and self-destruction of overeating, there is space to actualize new adventures. But before I become overwhelmed or grandiose in my thinking, the Program gently reminds me that it is STILL just one day a time.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will work my program so that I have a future.
~ Christine S. ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is a fundamental unity that underlies the fellowship of our programs. It is this unity that can comfort us and help us hold on when we want a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort more than we want this new unfamiliar life.
God, as I understand You, show me how to take comfort from the unity of fellowship when drugs call me back.
Hope
Hope is on my horizon. I feel it in my bones, I sense it in my being, I know it to be part of who I am. I will never give up hope. Hope for a better world, a better life, a better me. Hope is that feeling that led explores to cross dangerous oceans in search of a new world. Hope is what keeps people who are imprisoned from giving up. Hope is what allows those who have all they hold dear taken from them to begin again. Hope is natural. It is a gift that I will allow myself to have.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Emotional pain is not a character defect. It is a part of life and must be attended to like all our feelings. Feelings are not facts. They are bio-feedback on how we are doing today and what needs attention inside. How are you doing today?
Feelings won't kill me, but killing my feelings will.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Refuse to attack yourself.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I choose to do things for me that make me feel good about myself.
Today is a perfect day to do something that I have been putting off.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Extreme remedies are very appropriate for extreme diseases. - Hippocrates.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 24, 2018 8:19:32 GMT -5
September 25
Daily Reflections
FIRST THINGS FIRST
Some of us have taken very hard knocks to learn this truth:
Job or no job -- wife or no wife -- we simply do not stop
drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people
ahead of dependence on God.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 98
Before coming to A.A., I always had excuses for taking a
drink: "She said . . . , " "He said . . . ," "I got fired
yesterday," "I got a great job today." No area of my life
could be good if I drank again. In sobriety my life gets
better each day. I must always remember not to drink, to
trust God, and to stay active in A.A. Am I putting anything
before my sobriety, God, and A.A. today?
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Let us consider the term "spiritual experience" as given
in Appendix II of the Big Book: "A spiritual experience
is something that brings about a personality change. By
surrendering our lives to God as we understand Him, we
are changed. The nature of this change is evident in
recovered alcoholics. This personality change is not
necessarily in the nature of a sudden and spectacular
upheaval. We do no need to acquire an immediate and
overwhelming God-consciousness followed at once by a vast
change in feeling and outlook. In most cases, the change
is gradual." Do I see a gradual and continuing change in
myself?
Meditation For The Day
"Come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden and I
will give you rest." For rest from the care of life, you
can turn to God each day in prayer and communion. Real
relaxation and serenity comes from a deep sense of the
fundamental goodness of the universe. God's everlasting
arms are underneath all and will support you. Commune with
God, not so much for petitions to be granted as for the
rest that comes from relying on His will and His purposes
for your life. Be sure of God's strength available to you,
be conscious of His support, and wait quietly until that
true rest from God fills your being.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be conscious of God's support today.
I pray that I may rest safe and sure therein.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Behind Our Excuses, p.267
As excuse-makers and rationalizers, we drunks are champions. It
is the business of the psychiatrist to find the deeper causes for
our conduct. Though uninstructed in psychiatry, we can, after a
little time in A.A., see that our motives have not been what we thought
they were, and that we have been motivated by forces previously
unknown to us. Therefore we ought to look, with the deepest respect,
interest, and profit, upon the example set us by psychiatry.
********************************
"Spiritual growth through the practice of A.A.'s Twelve Steps,
plus the aid of a good sponsor, can usually reveal most of the
deeper reasons for our character defects, at least to a degree that
meets our practical needs. Nevertheless, we should be grateful that
our friends in psychiatry have so strongly emphasized the necessity to
search for false and often unconscious motivations."
1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.236
2. Letter, 1966
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Willingness to listen
Willingness
Why is it that we'll accept information from some people but not from
others? Many people tried to advise us while we were drinking; why
would we listen only to recovering alcoholics?
We can't answer that question, except to say that most human beings
are willing to listen only to certain people at certain times. That's why
business organizations have to select sales people carefully; customers
will respond to some people, but not to others.
As we grow in sobriety, however, we develop the willingness to listen to
people we would have once avoided. We can find wonderful ideas in all
sorts of places and from all types of people. As we become more
open-minded and willing, we can listen more and learn more.
My prejudices and fears of the past kept me from listening to people
who would have helped me. I'll be more open-minded and willing today.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Martyrs set bad examples---David Russell
Sometimes we call people “martyrs.” We sometimes think of them
as victims. They suffer, but sometimes not for a cause. They play
“poor me.” They want people to notice how much they suffer. They
are afraid to really live. These are the people who set bad examples.
True martyrs died for causes they believed in. We remember them
because they were so full of energy and spirit. Recovery helps us
live better. Let’s go for it!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks for giving me energy
and for healing my spirit. Help me live fully by putting my life in
Your care.
Action for the Day: What kind of example do I set? Does my life
reflect joy for life and recovery?
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
...we do not always like what is good for us in this world. --Eleanor Roosevelt
Most of us can look back and recall how we fought a particular change.
How certain we were that we wouldn't survive the upheaval! Perhaps we
lost a love or were forced to leave a home or a job. Retrospect allows
us to see the good of the change, and we can see the necessary part
each change has played in our development as recovering women.
We've had to change to cover the distances we've traveled. And
we'll have to continue changing.
The program and its structure, and our faith in that structure, can
ease the harsh consequences of change. Our higher power wants
only the best for us, of that we can be sure. However, the best may
not always "fit" when first we try it. Patience, trust, and prayer are a
winning combination when the time comes for us to accept a change.
We'll know when it's coming. Our present circumstances will begin to pinch.
Change means growth. It's a time for celebration, not dread. It means
I am ready to move ahead--that I have "passed" the current test.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
At the very beginning, the couple ought to frankly face the fact that each will have to yield here and there if the family is going to play an effective part in the new life. Father will necessarily spend much time with other alcoholics, but this activity should be balanced. New acquaintances who know nothing of alcoholism might be made and thoughtful considerations given their needs. The problems of the community might engage attention. Though the family has no religious connections, they may wish to make contact with or take membership in a religious body.
p. 131
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I attempted to "drink right" for the next eight years. My progression was phenomenal; there is absolutely no period in my drinking career that can be described as social drinking. I blacked out almost every time I put alcohol in my system, but I decided I could live with that; it was a small price to pay for the power and confidence alcohol gave me. After drinking for less than six months, I was almost a daily drinker.
pp. 320-321
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Perhaps, though, your relation to him is such that you would care to reveal only a part of your story. If this is the situation, by all means do so, for you ought to make a beginning as soon as you can. It may turn out, however, that you'll choose someone else for the more difficult and deeper revelations. This individual may be entirely outside of A.A.--for example, your clergyman or your doctor. For some of us, a complete stranger may prove the best bet.
p. 61
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One should not give up, neglect, or forget for a moment his inner life,
but he must learn to work in it, with it, and out of it, so that the unity
of his soul may break out in all his activities.
--Meister Eckhart
All people, have goodness in their hearts and greatness in their souls.
--Shelley
The more I let go of my own suffering and self-pity, I can see those
around me with the eyes of love and compassion. I am
becoming more aware of other people's pain and unhappiness today
and I will reach out to them in loving ways that
heal me while helping them to heal.
--Ruth Fishel
Today I am living in the moment, instead of living for a moment.
"Don't go through life, GROW through life."
--Eric Butterworth
If you hang out in a barber shop long enough, you are going to get a haircut.
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PRAYER
"Prayer is not asking. It is a
language of the soul."
-- Mohandas Gandhi
At school I was told that prayer is "talking to God". Then I discovered
that prayer is more than this -- prayer is a relationship with God. It is
a two-way system -- I talk to God but I must also listen to Him. Like
any relationship that is going to work and grow, it needs time. I must
spend time developing my relationship with God. I must create an
awareness of his presence in my life because I believe He is always
there for me.
But more than this, prayer is a yearning for truth within the center of
my being. In prayer I get in touch with that part of me that will be
forever restless until it finds rest, eternal rest, in Him.
O God, prayer is my journey into You.
************************************************** *********
How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony.
Psalm 133:1
"Lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called ...
bearing with one another in love, making every effort to maintain the
unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."
Ephesians 4:1-3
"Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is
good; love one another with brotherly affection; outdo one
another in showing honor. Never flag in zeal, be aglow with the
Spirit, serve the Lord."
Romans 12:9-11
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Daily Inspiration
Every decision we make is not critical nor is every mistake fatal.
Lord, help me keep things in perspective and avoid the panic such thinking creates.
Take time to learn from the mistakes of others. We don't have time
to make all of them ourselves. Lord, guide me onto paths that lead me to You.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
The Fourth Step - Fearing Our Feelings
"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."
Basic Text, p.29
A common complaint about the Fourth Step is that it makes us painfully conscious of our defects of character. We may be tempted to falter in our program of recovery. Through surrender and acceptance, we can find the resources we need to keep working the steps.
It's not the awareness of our defects that causes the most agony-it's the defects themselves. When we were using, all we felt was the drugs; we could ignore the suffering our defects were causing us. Now that the drugs are gone, we feel that pain. Refusing to acknowledge the source of our anguish doesn't make it go away; denial protects the pain and makes it stronger. The Twelve Steps help us deal with the misery caused by our defects by dealing directly with the defects themselves.
If we hurt from the pain of our defects, we can remind ourselves of the nightmare of addiction, a nightmare from which we've now awakened. We can recall the hope for release the Second Step gave us. We can again turn our will and our lives over, through the Third Step, to the care of the God of our understanding. Our Higher Power cares for us by giving us the help we need to work the rest of the Twelve Steps. We don't have to fear our feelings. Just for today, we can continue in our recovery.
Just for today: I won't be afraid of my feelings. With the help of my Higher Power, I'll continue in my recovery.
pg. 279
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Things don't turn up in this world until somebody turns them up. --James A. Garfield
We could learn from the bears in the woods how to turn up opportunities. To nourish themselves, they turn over logs and stumps to get insects. When they smell honey, they will climb a tree after it, and when they see berries they will move branches aside to get at them.
Like the bears, we need to turn up things for ourselves. Perhaps we can enter a drawing or writing contest. Maybe we can try out for a team sport or the orchestra. By doing this, we take risks, which foster our growth and build confidence, and we turn our lives into fulfilling adventures.
Why wait for opportunity to knock when we can knock at opportunity's door. Whatever our interests, finding ways to enjoy them can make the most out of the opportunities around us.
What opportunities are available to me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Be thine own palace, or the world's thy jail. --John Donne
All of us have some difficult circumstances to face today. Some among us find ourselves in the hospital or in jail. Others are worried about pressures and frustrations at work. Tensions and concerns about war and the future of the world affect us all. We have many uncontrollable circumstances in our lives, but we don't have to give ourselves over to them. A man's body may be in jail while in his heart he is free.
We build a palace for our spirits by maintaining contact with our Higher Power. We are always within the circle of God's love. Always! Knowing that helps us make peace with the limits on what we can do about our situations. Then we can go forth working to make peace in our relationships, accomplish what is possible in our lives, and make a contribution to others.
Today, I will remember that the frustrations around me are not all of who I am. When I am at peace within, I live among spiritual riches.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...we do not always like what is good for us in this world. --Eleanor Roosevelt
Most of us can look back and recall how we fought a particular change. How certain we were that we wouldn't survive the upheaval! Perhaps we lost a love or were forced to leave a home or a job. Retrospect allows us to see the good of the change, and we can see the necessary part each change has played in our development as recovering women. We've had to change to cover the distances we've traveled. And we'll have to continue changing.
The program and its structure, and our faith in that structure, can ease the harsh consequences of change. Our higher power wants only the best for us, of that we can be sure. However, the best may not always "fit" when first we try it. Patience, trust, and prayer are a winning combination when the time comes for us to accept a change. We'll know when it's coming. Our present circumstances will begin to pinch.
Change means growth. It's a time for celebration, not dread. It means I am ready to move ahead--that I have "passed" the current test.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Peace with the Past
Even God cannot change the past. --Agathon
Holding on to the past, either through guilt, longing, denial, or resentment, is a waste of valuable energy - energy that can be used to transform today and tomorrow.
"I used to live in my past," said one recovering woman. "I was either trying to change it, or I was letting it control me. Usually both.
"I constantly felt guilty about things that had happened. Things I had done; things others had done to me - even though I had made amends for most everything, the guilt ran deep. Everything was somehow my fault. I could never just let it go.
"I held on to anger for years, telling myself it was justified. I was in denial about a lot of things. Sometimes, I'd try to absolutely forget about my past, but I never really stopped and sorted through it; my past was like a dark cloud that followed me around, and I couldn't shake clear of it. I guess I was scared to let it go, afraid of today, afraid of tomorrow.
I've been recovering now for years, and it has taken me almost as many years to gain the proper perspective on my past. I'm learning I can't forget it; I need to heal from it. I need to feel and let go of any feelings I still have, especially anger.
"I need to stop blaming myself for painful events that took place, and trust that everything has happened on schedule, and truly all is okay. I've learned to stop regretting, and to start being grateful.
"When I think about the past, I thank God for the healing and the memory. If something occurs that needs an amend, I make it and am done with it. I've learned to look at my past with compassion for myself, trusting that my Higher Power was in control, even then.
"I've healed from some of the worst things that happened to me. I've made peace with myself about these issues, and I've learned that healing from some of these issues has enabled me to help others to heal too. I'm able to see how the worst things helped form my character and developed some of my finer points.
"I've even developed gratitude for my failed relationships because they have brought me to who and where I am today.
"What I've learned has been acceptance - without guilt, anger, blame, or shame. I've even had to learn to accept the years I spent feeling guilty, angry, shameful, and blaming."
We cannot control the past. But we can transform it by allowing ourselves to heal from it and by accepting it with love for others and ourselves. I know, because that woman is me.
Today, I will begin being grateful for my past. I cannot change what happened, but I can transform the past by owning my power, now, to accept, heal, and learn from it.
Today I choose to build a pathway to freedom from the bondage of self. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Discover Life’s Rhythm
Step into the natural rhythm for your life.
You don’t have to push through anymore. You don’t have to push yourself, life, or the energy flow.
If you get tired, take a break. Take a walk. Take in the healing energy of the world around you. Listen to the birds sing. Hear the laughter of a child. Feel the warm smile of a friend, or smile at a stranger passing by. If you get stuck or tangled up, stop trying force the solution. Back off, until the answer emerges naturally from that place of peace and natural instinct within you.
Step out of your tension, out of your fear. Laugh. Lighten up. Loosen up. Change your energy. Relax until you find the flow. Relax until you find your rhythm, until you feel life’s rhythm again.
Step into the rhythm of love.
*****
more language of letting go
Fill in the blanks
The magic of a story lies in the spaces between the words.
When we read a novel, we often find that the writer gives us only the barest elements of a scene, and yet our imagination fills in all the balnk spaces from our experiences, our hopes, our desires. We don't need the author to give us all of the details.
So it is with life. Often we are given only the barest outline of the path that we are to follow, and yet if we are silent and listen to our hearts, we can hear all of the details of our path spelled out for us, a step at a time. There is no need to have everything laid out for us beforehand. If it were, there would be no need to take the trip. We could simply read about it.
Get up.
Live your path with heart.
Fill in the blanks yourself.
God, give me the strength to find out how the story ends by living until the end of it, instead of wanting it read to me beforehand.
*****
Words of Wisdom
Affirmations by Madisyn Taylor
Our minds accept as truth the critical statements we tell ourselves, but it can also accept our positive affirmations.
The words we speak and think hold great sway over the kind of life that we create for ourselves. Many people live their lives plagued by negative thoughts and never even realize this. They tell themselves and others that they are doomed to fail, not good enough, or not worthy of love, yet they are amazed when their reality starts reflecting these words. Just as the subconscious mind accepts as truth the critical statements we tell ourselves, however, it is also equipped to instantly accept the veracity of our affirmations.
Affirmations are statements chosen and spoken consciously. Once they enter our realm of consciousness, they also enter our subconscious mind where they have the power to change our lives. The affirmations you create should be specific, not too long, worded positively, formed in complete sentences, and spoken in the present tense as if what you are affirming is already true. It is a good idea to repeat your affirmations daily. You may want to tell yourself that you deserve to be happy or that you are in control of your destiny. Or, you may want to focus on a particular goal, such as attracting new friends. Rather than telling yourself you want to be well-liked, say, “I am well-liked.” Your subconscious mind will pick up on these positive messages, and you will begin to live your life as if what you are affirming already has happened. Soon, your reality will begin to reflect your affirmations. If you find that you are thwarting yourself with negative thinking, try repeating ! your affirmations several times a day. Write your affirmations down and say them aloud or in your mind. Allow your conviction to grow stronger each time you say your affirmations, and your negativity will be overridden by your motivation and positive thoughts.
Affirmations are a powerful tool for creating our desired reality. We consciously and subconsciously invite opportunity into our lives when we say affirmations. Trust in the power of your affirmations, and you will very quickly create what you have already stated to be true. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
At the suggestion of a long-timer in The Program, I began taking “recovery inventories” periodically. The results showed me — clearly and unmistakeably — that the promises of The Program have been true for me. I am not the sick person I was in years past; I am no longer bankrupt in all areas; I have a new life and a path to follow, and I’m at peace with myself most of the time. And that’s far way from the time in my life when I dreaded facing each new day. Perhaps we should all write recovery inventories from time to time, showing how The Program is working for each of us. Just for today, will I try to sow faith where there is fear?
Today I Pray
God, let me compare my new life with the old one — just to see how things have changed for me. May I make progress reports for myself now and then — and for those who are newer to The Program. May these reports be — heartrendingly — about “what I am doing” rather than — smug — about “what I have done.”
Today I Will Remember
Has The Program kept its promise? Have I kept mine?
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One More Day
Fate chooses our relatives. We choose our friends.
– Jacques Bossuet
We had no choice — and still have no choice — as to whether our families are supportive and caring. Those of us who lived in negative or unnurturing families may find that we slip into similar situations as adults. Without realizing it, we may have fostered friendships that allow us to use the same old scripts — the same unhealthy scripts.
One of the things we’ve learned from our illness is we must be willing to nurture ourselves. We need approval and love, and we have it within our power to give that gift to ourselves. We also can enter only into friendships based on these qualities, allowing us to be cared for and to care for others.
I choose today to work toward healthy, loving friendships.
************************************************** *****************
Food For Thought
Don’t Hang On
As long as we are alive, we will experience times of joy and times of sadness. Trying to hang on to the periods of elation and avoid the inevitable depression which each of us feels from time to time causes us to seek artificial stimulation. Using food to try to stay on cloud nine did not work, and neither does anything else.
By turning over our lives, we become willing to let go and move through the periods of joy and sadness as we come to them. Trying to hang on arrests our progress. Nothing is certain in this life except change, and when we stop overeating we are better able to deal with the variations in our feelings and circumstances.
Whatever our current mood or situation, we can remain abstinent. Abstinence gives our lives stability and order, in spite of changes. Being centered in the Power greater than ourselves keeps us from being overly affected by either elation or depression.
By focusing on You, may I move calmly through the times of joy and the times of sadness.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
COURAGE
“Courage faces fear and thereby masters it.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.
I've never been a brave person and was always very fearful. I would watch movies where the hero would rescue the heroine, someone would climb Mount Everest or perform some feat of daring, and I would be totally in awe. I was afraid of the dark, of rejection, of failure and of most other things that I was convinced took courage. There’s no way would I go parasailing or deep sea diving as that seemed to require the courage that I lacked.
I didn't understand then that people who do those kinds of things are not totally without fear, but they have a way of overcoming their fear and still doing it anyway.
When I came into the program and learned that I would have to do an inventory and then, worse still, make amends to the people I had harmed, I was paralyzed by fear. Eventually I realized that, even though I feared doing these things, all I had to do was ask my Higher Power for strength and guidance and then do the things I'd most feared. Perhaps these weren't the feats of daring that I had seen heroes perform, but for me they were great victories and in being able to do them, I knew that I was developing courage.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will continue to walk through my fear with my Higher Power at my side, knowing that I am developing the courage that I thought I lacked.
Sharon S.
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. This applies, too, to other spiritual expressions which you find in this book. - Pg. 47 - We Agnostics
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
As you begin this day at this morning hour, know that there are several million people who genuinely love you. This is the nature of our fellowship.
All the love I need is flowing into my life today.
Being More of Me
Today, I realize that if I am to stand centered and strong within my life and self, I will need to plant a garden within my own soul. A garden for me to nurture and to nurture me. A haven of beauty. I will find my own voice and sing my song because if I don't sing it, it will not be sung. It is all I have and it is enough. I do not need to prove anything to anyone anymore. I have come home -- to me. The truth is, I was here all along, only I forgot to look for myself. Instead, I searched for me in other people's meaning and became lost in their stories. I am not lost today. I know that there is nowhere to look for me but within myself, and no one to lead me there but me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Sponsors carry the message, not the sponsee.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I choose to build a pathway to freedom from the bondage of self.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I was worried about stuff I couldn't remember for my 4th Step. My sponsor said: 'Let's just do the fridge, we'll get to the freezer later. - Tony.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 25, 2018 11:39:53 GMT -5
September 26
Daily Reflections
OUR CHILDREN
The alcoholic may find it hard to re-establish friendly
relations with his children. . . . In time they will see
that he is a new man and in their own way they will let
him know it. . . . From that point on, progress will be
rapid. Marvelous results often follow such a reunion.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 134
While on the road to recovery I received a gift that
could not be purchased. It was a card from my son in
college, saying, "Dad, you can't imagine how glad I
am that everything is okay. Happy Birthday, I love you."
My son had told me that he loved me before. It had been
during the previous Christmas holidays, when he had said
to me, while crying, "Dad, I love you! Can't you see what
you're doing to yourself?" I couldn't. Choked with emotion,
I had cried, but this time, when I received my son's card,
my tears were tears of joy, not desperation.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Continuing the consideration of the term "spiritual experience":
"The acquiring of an immediate and overwhelming God-consciousness,
resulting in a dramatic transformation, though frequent, is by
no means the rule. Most of our spiritual experiences are of the
educational variety, and they develop slowly over a period of
time. Quite often friends of newcomers are aware of the
difference long before they are themselves. They finally
realize that they have undergone a profound alteration in
their reaction to life and that such a change could hardly have
been brought about by themselves alone." Is my outlook on
life changing for the better?
Meditation For The Day
Look at the world as your Father's house. Think of all people
you meet as guests in you Father's house, to be treated with
love and consideration. Look at yourself as a servant in your
father's house, as a servant of all. Think of no work as beneath
you. Be ever ready to do all you can for others who need your
help. There is gladness in God's service. There is much
satisfaction in serving the highest that you know. Express your
love for God in service to all who are living with you in your
Father's house.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may serve others out of gratitude to God.
I pray that my work may be a small repayment for His grace
so freely given me.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Those Other People, p.268
"Just like you, I have often thought myself the victim of what other
people say and do. Yet every time I confessed the sins of such
people, especially those whose sins did not correspond exactly with
my own, I found that I only increased the total damage. My own
resentment, my self-pity would often render me well-nigh useless to
anybody.
"So, nowadays, if anyone talks of me so as to hurt, I first ask myself if
there is any truth at all in what they say. If there is none, I try to
remember that I too have had my periods of speaking bitterly of
others; that hurtful gossip is but a symptom of our remaining
emotional illness; and consequently that I must never be angry at the
unreasonableness of sick people.
"Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again, to forgive
others--also myself. Have you recently tried this?"
Letter, 1946
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The Limited and Unlimited
Spiritual growth.
In our human experience, we face one imitation after another. We are
always up against limited time energy, limited knowledge.
Yet everything we're learning tells us that all of these are without limit
in the universal. In terms of energy, for example, we know that we
would be rich beyond belief if we could really tap the sun's energy that
rushes to the earth.
What we call human progress may really refer to the gaining of knowledge
that enables us to shake off limitations. We actually did that by becoming
sober in our 12 Step program. Now we're learning to extend our limits in
many other ways; and though we are human and limited, we surely have
not begun to each any limits as far as God is concerned. Limited though
we seem to be, we're part of a Universe that is without limits.
I'll focus today on the possibility of extending my limits, knowing that
this is what God has planned for me.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
The distance doesn’t matter; only the first step is difficult.---Mme. Marquise du Deffand
During our addiction, we were on a path leading to death---death of our
spirit, mind, and body.
On that path, we tired not to think about where it would lead. We didn’t
want to get there. We just followed the path toward death, with one drink,
pill, snort or toke at a time.
Now we’ve chosen a new path for our lives. Making that choice was hard.
We knew only the old path. We were afraid to change. But we did it. That
was the hardest part.
We are excited to follow our new path. We know it leads to good things.
We can follow the map---the Twelve Steps---and enjoy the trip. It will last
as long as we live, and the map will guide us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks for helping me choose the path of life.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll study the map for my life by reading the Twelve Steps.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Why is life so tragic, so like a little strip of pavement over an abyss? I look
down; I feel giddy; I wonder how I am ever to walk to the end. --Virginia Woolf
As we look toward the hours ahead, we can be thankful that we need be
concerned with only a single day's worth of hours. No more. What may
come tomorrow, a decision that might be necessary next week, a big change
in our lives coming next year, all will be handled with ease, when the time is right.
How fortunate we are, those of us who share this program for living! Our
worries about the future are over, if we want them to be. We need to take
only one step at a time. One day at a time. And always in the care of God.
Relief from our lives of worry is immediate when we live the axiom, "Let go and let God."
Life does present us with tragedies, and we learn from them. They need not
detour us, however. In fact, they strengthen us and encourage personal growth.
And no experience will ever be more than we and our higher power can handle.
I will turn to the program and everything it offers today. Just today, and no more,
is my concern.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
Alcoholics who have derided religious people will be helped by such contacts. Being possessed of a spiritual experience, the alcoholic will find he has much in common with these people, though he may differ with them on many matters. If he does not argue about religion, he will make new friends and is sure to find new avenues of usefulness and pleasure. He and his family can be a bright spot in such congregations. He may bring new hope and new courage to many a priest, minister, or rabbi, who gives his all to minister to our troubled world. We intend the foregoing as a helpful suggestion only. So far as we are concerned, there is nothing obligatory about it. As non-denominational people, we cannot make up others’ minds for them. Each individual should consult his own conscience.
pp. 131-132
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I wound up on academic probation (I had always been on the honor roll in high school) my first semester sophomore year, and my response to that was to change my major. My life in campus revolved around parties, drinking, and men. I surrounded myself with people who drank as I did. Even though several people had already expressed their concern over my drinking, I rationalized that I was only doing what every other red-blooded college student did.
p. 321
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
The real tests of the situation are your own willingness to confide and your full confidence in the one with whom you share your first accurate self-survey. Even when you've found the person, it frequently takes great resolution to approach him or her. No one ought to say the A.A. program requires no willpower; here is one place you may require all you've got. Happily, though, the chances are that you will be in for a very pleasant surprise. When your mission is carefully explained, and it is seen by the recipient of your confidence how helpful he can really be, the conversation will start easily and will soon become eager. Before long, your listener may well tell a story or two about himself which will place you even more at ease. Provided you hold back nothing, your sense of relief will mount from minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of years break out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing tranquillity takes its place. And when humility and serenity are so combined, something else of great moment is apt to occur. Many an A.A., once agnostic or atheistic, tells us that it was during this stage of Step Five that he first actually felt the presence of God. And even those who had faith already often become conscious of God as they never were before.
pp. 61-62
************************************************** *********
"Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for
to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they
satisfy you."
--Wayne Dyer
Every second of every moment is a new beginning.
I can start my day over any time I choose.
I can also begin my life anew at any time.
This very moment can be a new beginning!
"Nothing we learn in this world is ever wasted."
--Eleanor Roosevelt
"Our worth is determined by the good deeds we do, rather than
by the fine emotions we feel."
--Elias L, Magoon
"It is only possible to live happily-ever-after on a day-to-day basis."
--Margaret Bonano
"Each day provides its own gifts."
--Martial
"The best way to secure future happiness is to be as happy as
is rightfully possible today."
--Charles W. Eliot
Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, start all over again.
--Dorothy Fields
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PAIN
"You can't hold a man down
without staying down with him."
-- Booker T. Washington
I know who was holding me down in my life. I was. I know who was
bringing pain and sadness in my life. I was. I know who was making me
the victim of addiction. I was. I would beat myself up and then
complain about the bruises!
I did this because I could not "see". I had not accepted or understood
the implications of my alcoholism. Today I am beginning to take care
of myself because I have accepted my disease. I do not choose today
to be the enemy in my life -- I have surrendered to live. I do not want
to hurt anymore. I do not want to hide in guilt and fear anymore. I do
not choose to be my victim today.
God, I thank You for the freedom to determine my life and my
victories.
************************************************** *********
“The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will
reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit
will reap eternal life.” Galatians 6:8
Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one
thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me
heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
An ordinary day can become profound by realizing your importance to others
and acting on it. Lord, may I be dependable to those who depend on me
without complaints or resentments.
Rejoice. This is the day the Lord has made. Lord, my days pass so quickly.
May I have a generous heart and the time to see the needs of those around me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Seeing Ourselves In Others
"It will not make us better people to judge the faults of another."
Basic Text, p.37
How easy it is to point out the faults of others! There's a reason for this: The defects we identify most easily in others are often the defects we are most familiar with in our own characters. We may notice our best friend's tendency to spend too much money, but if we examine our own spending habits we'll probably find the same compulsiveness. We may decide our sponsor is much too involved in service, but find that we haven't spent a single weekend with our families in the past three months because of one service commitment or another.
What we dislike in our fellows are often those things we dislike most in ourselves. We can turn this observation to our spiritual advantage. When we are stricken with the impulse to judge someone else, we can redirect the impulse in such a way as to recognize our own defects more clearly. What we see will guide our actions toward recovery and help us become emotionally healthy and happy individuals.
Just for today: I will look beyond the character defects of others and recognize my own.
pg. 280
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
There is no hope of joy except in human relations. --Antoine de Saint Exupery
It is hard to imagine being really joyful and excited without our family and friends. We can imagine a birthday party with no one but us attending. Even if we got many gifts, we would feel empty if there were no one around to share our excitement with.
Our joy comes from each other. Even the hard times furnish us with wonderful memories for later in life. We share the good and the bad, and the rewards of both. When our lives together seem too difficult, when it's too hard to share, too crowded to think, when there are too many disagreements, we can find comfort by looking at one another once again and seeing all the ways we are truly alike, and what we share every moment that we sometimes take for granted--our food, our thoughts, the very air we breathe.
What are the things we share right now?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
To try to extinguish the drive for riches with money is like trying to quench afire by pouring butterfat over it. --Hindu proverb
In recovery, we learn what we truly want and what is only a symbol of our desires. Do we truly want to use our energies pursuing success, or are we seeking approval from others? Do we truly want money so much, or are we attempting to escape the basically insecure nature of life? Do we truly enjoy the pleasure of food so much, or are we in search of comfort for our emotions?
Our desires, our wants, and our anxieties are spiritual issues. What at first we think we want may only hide deeper, more vulnerable, and painful feelings. When we admit the deeper fears and desires, we move closer to the spiritual truths of our lives. We can search for acceptance within ourselves and from God. We can learn to have spiritual peace in an insecure world. We can learn to accept the love of others even though we know we're not perfect.
Today, I will ask myself what I want and listen with courage to my answer. It will lead me in my spiritual progress.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Why is life so tragic, so like a little strip of pavement over an abyss? I look down; I feel giddy; I wonder how I am ever to walk to the end. --Virginia Woolf
As we look toward the hours ahead, we can be thankful that we need be concerned with only a single day's worth of hours. No more. What may come tomorrow, a decision that might be necessary next week, a big change in our lives coming next year, all will be handled with ease, when the time is right.
How fortunate we are, those of us who share this program for living! Our worries about the future are over, if we want them to be. We need to take only one step at a time. One day at a time. And always in the care of God. Relief from our lives of worry is immediate when we live the axiom, "Let go and let God."
Life does present us with tragedies, and we learn from them. They need not detour us, however. In fact, they strengthen us and encourage personal growth. And no experience will ever be more than we and our higher power can handle.
I will turn to the program and everything it offers today. Just today, and no more, is my concern.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Feeling Protected
Our task is not a naive one of feeling safe, of living and loving in a utopian world. One woman commented that our task is making ourselves feel safe while learning to live and love in a world that is unsafe.
We do not want to dwell on the dangers, for that gives power to the negative. Neither do we want to ignore them or pretend they don't exist.
If we were going to sunbathe, we would not be naive about the dangers from the sun. We know that harmful rays can burn. We would take steps to protect ourselves, so that we could enjoy the benefits of the sun.
That is our task in recovery.
This is what a woman, a helping professional, told me:
Picture a sunscreen surrounding you. Place it around yourself - not too heavy and thick so no light can penetrate, and not so thin that you are exposed to danger.
See yourself protected by a sunscreen that is effective. Make certain that the screen is open to the good. For a while, your screen was too heavy. It held back what you wanted. Now change it to let the good come through.
This is your screen for life and the world. See it. Imagine it surrounding you always. It wraps you in love, in comfort, in protection. No harm can enter. No negative energy can penetrate the screen.
Go in peace; go in safety;, now, know you are protected. Go anywhere you need to go. The evil has been blocked; the goodwill comes pouring forth. You do not have to work so hard at protecting yourself. You can relax and enjoy life trusting that you are safe. Go without fear, for you are wrapped in love and protection. And you shall always be.
Today, I will envision myself wrapped in a shield that blocks the negative and harmful rays of the world, but it is constructed so that the good can enter.
Today I have the courage I need to take the step forward in my life that I have been putting off. I can manage one step at a time, one change at a time, with ease and confidence. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Trust Even the Dark Moments
While on our journey, life can sometimes get bleak. Dark passages may envelop us.
Expect these moments. Often they come at the deepest period of working things out. It can be a time of despair, frustration, dead ends, anguish, and angst. Sometimes these moments are brief; sometimes they last a long time. But usually they are necessary.
Plan on these moments. They are not the end of the journey. They are the passageway through the tunnel and into the light. In just a little while, you will feel, see, and know the purpose of what you’re going through. Soon it will become clear. You will move out of the darkness and into the light.
*****
more language of letting go
Connect yourself
What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot-dog vendor? Can you make me one with everything?
I was buckling my seat belt in the little Cessna one day, getting ready for flight training, when my instructor Rob turned to me.
"I just take a second when I strap myself in and tell myself I'm becoming one with the plane as I do," Rob said. "It really helped me in the beginning when I was nervous and felt so separate from the airplane."
What a great idea, I thought. That day turned into one of my most comfortable flying lessons. It reminded me of a lesson I had learned a while back.
For most of my life, I felt disconnected from things: from myself, from other people, from life. That feeling of separateness haunted me. It explains why I tried so desperately to attach myself codependently to people, places, and things.
Over the years, I began to see that my separateness was an illusion. The same energy, the same life force, that runs through all the universe runs through you and me, too.
We're connected, whether we know it or not.
Nobody has to make you one with everything. You already are.
Let go of your illusion of separateness.
Connect yourself.
God, help me know my oneness with the world. Help me know how connected I really am so I don't have to connect in ways that don't work.
Trust even the bleak times. When you reach the end of the tunnel, then you will know why this all had to be.
*****
Other People’s Agendas
Appreciating Suggestions by Madisyn Taylor
When other people are always offering suggestions on how we should live our life, there is often a void in their own life.
As children, our parents had dreams for us. They wanted us to do well in school, and to do whatever was necessary to reach our highest potential. Later in life, friends may try to set us up with their idea of the perfect partner or the perfect job. Spouses may have agendas for us, too. People close to us may have ideas about how we should live our lives, ideas that usually come from love and the desire for us to be happy. Other times, they come from a place of need within them—whether it is the parent who wants us to live out his or her dreams or the friend or spouse who wants us to play an already-defined role. Whatever the case, we can appreciate and consider those people’s input, but ultimately we must follow our own inner guidance.
There may come a time when all the suggestions can become overbearing. We may feel that the people we love don’t approve of our judgment, which can hurt our feelings. It can interfere with the choices we make for our lives by making us doubt ourselves, or filling a void with their wishes before we’ve had a chance to decide what we want. It can affect us energetically as well. We may have to deal with feelings of resistance or the need to shut ourselves off from them. But we can take some time to rid ourselves of any unnecessary doubts and go within to become clear on what we desire for ourselves.
We can tell our loved ones how much we appreciate their thoughts and ideas, but that we need to live our own lives and make our own decisions. We can explain that they need to let us learn from our own experiences rather than rob us of wonderful life lessons and the opportunity to fine-tune our own judgment. When they see that we are happy with our lives and the path we are taking to reach our goals, they can rest assured that all we need them to do is to share in our joy. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Is freedom from addiction all that we’re to expect from a spiritual awakening? Not at all. Freedom from addiction is only the bare beginning; it’s only the first gift of our first awakening. Obviously, if more gifts are to come our way, our awakening has to continue. As it does continue we find that slowly but surely we can scrap the old life — the one that didn’t work — for a new life that can and does work under any and all conditions. Am I willing to continue my awakening thorough the practice of the Twelve Steps?
Today I Pray
May I remember how it was when my only goal in life was to be free of my addiction. All the words and phrases I used were stoppers – “giving it up,” “quitting,” cutting myself off.” Once I was free, I began to realize that my freedom had more to do with “beginning” than “stopping.” May I now continue to think in terms of starters — “expanding,” “awakening,” “growing,” “learning,” “becoming.”
Today I Will Remember
My stopping was a starting point.
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One More Day
The modern sympathy with invalids is morbid. Illness of any kind is hardly a thing to be encouraged in others.
– Oscar Wilde
When chronic illness strikes, there are no rules of social behavior we can fall back on. Nothing prepares us for the harsh reality of illness. There is a very delicate balance here. We want those who love us to understand, and we want them to help, but not to pity us.
We need to face squarely the changes that chronic illness brings, both for our loved ones and for us. By openly talking to each other abo0ut our problems of adjusted and loss, we can become less preoccupied with our losses and think more about the future. We will be less concerned with being “in-valid>’ We can move forth to a meaningful and valid life.
Facing the changes caused by chronic illness can, in the long fun, serve to make me stronger.
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Food For Thought
Character Defects
Beginning the OA program, we are inclined to feel that our problems and difficulties are largely due to circumstances and other people. The enemy seems to be outside. The more we work the Steps, the more we realize that our troubles are within, rather than without. Furthermore, we learn that the only person we can change is our self.
We see that the root of our difficulty lies in being centered on self instead of centered in our Higher Power. Our egos can take us only so far before we reach a point where continued growth demands that we begin to abandon them. What a relief to get rid of the anxiety, frustration, and fear that goes with an ego-centered life!
Our Higher Power removes our character defects as we become willing to let go of them. Honest awareness is our first task, and this is facilitated by maintaining abstinence from compulsive overeating. Abstinence gives us the honesty and the energy to change. As we change, circumstances and relationships improve.
I ask that You remove my character defects according to Your will.
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One Day At A Time
LETTING GO
“We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”
Joseph Campbell
It’s hard to give up old habits. Although my former solutions to dealing with stress, anger, and emotional and physical pain had never worked and only made the problems worse, they were familiar. I had high hopes the results would be different each time. I wasn’t too surprised when it didn’t happen because this was familiar ground.
Then I heard about this program, half-heartedly joined and began working the Twelve Steps. It was scary! Things began happening to me that I’d never dreamed possible. I was given abstinence! I had not planned for that to happen. How could I, when I had no idea what abstinence would really be like?
At first I felt very anxious, sure the abstinence would be snatched from me just as I was beginning to feel comfortable with it. While I enjoyed abstinence and not having to focus on my eating disorder's requirements, I often felt like I was in foreign territory without a map. I couldn't plan my life like I had before because my life was busy evolving in ways I couldn't imagine.
But the longer I worked the program, the happier my life became. To my utter shock I’ve recently discovered that I, a control freak and ultimate planner of everything, have begun to enjoy the unpredictability that my Higher Power has so graciously put in my life.
Before the program I never appreciated spontaneity; I couldn’t. Now, a day without plans is an opportunity.
One day at a time...
I will pray to let go of my will
and instead to be open to my Higher Power's will for me.
~ Rhonda
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
So we shall describe some of the mental states that precede a relapse into drinking, for obviously this is the crux of the problem. - Pg. 35 - More About Alcoholism
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Honesty without kindness is cruel and kindness without honesty is codependence.
If I can’t say it kindly, I needn’t say it at all.
One Life
I have one life I can do something about and that life is mine. I have one mind through which to think the next right thought, one heart through which to experience the next feeling and one body through which to take the next right action. I cannot control another person. That is part of my disease, wanting to fix. I have spent too many years feeling overwhelmed by other people's problems, hurt by other people's actions and baffled by disease related behaviors. When I try to control others I will ask myself if I am feeling overwhelmed by their lives being out of order and need to take a step back. If I really want to distance them and I feel guilty about that feeling so I run in to fix instead and I need to take a step back.
- Tian Dayton PhD
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Where do you find recovery? Twelve steps past any lengths.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm living according to my truth, knowing that freedom and happiness are the result.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I know my capacity for drink but I keep getting drunk before I reach it. - Oliver R.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 29, 2018 8:40:27 GMT -5
practicing service to others, if my successes give
rise to grandiosity, I must reflect on what brought me to
this point. What has been given joyfully, with love, must
be passed on without reservation and without expectation.
For as I grow, I find that no matter how much I give with
love, I receive much more in spirit.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Continuing the consideration of the term "spiritual experience":
"What often takes place in a few months could seldom have been
accomplished by years of self-discipline. With few exceptions,
our members find that they have tapped an unsuspected inner
resource which they presently identify with their own conception
of a Power greater than themselves. Most of us think this
awareness of a Power greater than ourselves the essence of
spiritual experience. Some of us call it God-consciousness.
In any case, willingness, honesty, and open-mindedness are
the essentials of recovery." Have I tapped that inner resource
which can change my life?
Meditation For The Day
God's power in your life increases as your ability to understand
His grace increases. The power of God's grace is only limited by
the understanding and will of each individual. God's miracle-working
power is only limited in each individual soul by the lack of
spiritual vision of the soul. God respects free will, the right
of each person to accept or reject His miracle-working power.
Only the sincere desire of the soul gives Him the opportunity
to bestow it.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not limit God's power by my lack of vision.
I pray that I may keep my mind open today to His influence.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
When Infancy Is Over, p.269
"You must remember that every A.A. group starts, as it should,
through the efforts of a single man and his friends--a founder and
his hierarchy. There is no other way.
"But when infancy is over, the original leaders always have to make
way for that democracy which springs up through the grass roots and
will eventually sweep aside the self-chosen leadership of the past."
********************************
Letter to Dr. Bob:
"Everywhere the A.A. groups have taken their service affairs into
their own hands. Local founders and their friends are now on the side
lines. Why so many people forget that, when thinking of the future of
our world services, I shall never understand.
"The groups will eventually take over, and maybe they will squander
their inheritance when they get it. It is probable, however, that they won't.
Anyhow, they really have grown up; A.A. is theirs; let's give it to them.
Letters
1. 1950
2. 1949
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The Test Of My Ideas
Change
Early in its existence, the AA fellowship tended to resist new ideas, yet did
accept many good purpose, because it screened out practices that could have
destroyed the fellowship.
But other, new ideas have been accepted and have benefited the fellowship.
How can we test a new idea before we decide to accept it?
Whatever the idea, it should be beneficial in promoting personal recovery.
If it is somehow harmful to those seeking recovery, it should not be accepted.
If this simple test is applied honestly and with fairness, new ideas can be
considered on their own merits and can usually be discussed in an atmosphere
of reason and understanding. The AA traditions will support most sound ideas.
Knowing that God is the source of new ideas, we can be open to additional guides
that can help us along the way. I'll be on the lookout today for any helpful ideas.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Honesty is the backbone of our recovery program. Honesty opens us up. It breaks
down the walls we had built around our secret world. Those walls made a prison for
us. But all of that is now changed. We are free.
Honesty has made us wise. We aren’t sneaking drinks anymore. We don’t have a
stash to protect.
People who didn’t trust us now depend on our honesty. People who worked hard to
avoid us, now seek us out. Self-honesty is the greatest gift we can give ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You are truth. I pray that I may not turn away
from truth. I will not lie. My life depends on honesty.
Action For the Day: For twenty or thirty minutes, I will think about how learning to
be honest has changed my life.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
The wisdom of all ages and cultures emphasizes the tremendous power our thoughts
have over our character and circumstances. --Liane Cordes
"As we think, so we are." We are gifted with the personal power to make thoughtful
choices and thus decide whom we are. Our actions and choices combine to create our
character, and our character influences the circumstances of our lives.
Our personal mind power will work to our advantage when we think positively, or it
will contribute to our disadvantage. Imagining our good fortunes will prepare us for
them. Imagining the successful completion of a task heightens and strengthens the
commitment we must make daily to it. Imagining the steps necessary to the successful
accomplishment of any goal directs our efforts so we don't falter along the way. Our
minds work powerfully for our good. And just as powerfully to our detriment, when
fears intrude on all our thoughts.]
The program has given me positive personal power; it lies in the relationship I have
with my higher power. My outlook and attitude toward life reveals the strength of my
connection to God. I will work with God and imagine my good fortune today.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes tragic things. We have been dealing with alcohol in its worst aspect. But we aren’t a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn’t want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life. We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations, nor do we carry the world’s troubles on our shoulders. When we see a man sinking into the mire that is alcoholism, we give him first aid and place what we have at his disposal. For his sake, we do recount and almost relive the horrors of our past. But those of us who have tried to shoulder the entire burden and trouble of others find we are soon overcome by them.
p. 132
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
Somehow I managed to graduate, but while most of my friends were securing jobs and abruptly stopping their boozing, I seemed to be left behind on campus. I had resolved that I, too, would now settle down and drink properly, but to my frustration I found I could not do so.
p. 321
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
This feeling of being at one with God and man, this emerging from isolation through the open and honest sharing of our terrible burden of guilt, brings us to a resting place where we may prepare ourselves for the following Steps toward a full and meaningful sobriety.
p. 62
************************************************** *********
Come, let us give a little time to folly... and even in a melancholy
day let us find time for an hour of pleasure.
--Saint Bonaventura
"Good habits are as addictive as bad habits, and a lot more rewarding."
--Harvey Mackay
It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is
invisible to the eye.
--Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Real success requires respect for and faithfulness to the highest
human values - honesty, integrity, self-discipline, dignity, compassion,
humility, courage, personal responsibility, courtesy, and human service.
--Michael DeBakey, M.D.
Hope never abandons you, you abandon it.
--George Weinberg
Each day, and the living of it, has to be a conscious creation in which
discipline and order are relieved with some play and pure foolishness.
--May Sarton
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ACHIEVEMENT
"Do not mistake activity for
achievement."
-- Mabel Newcomber
Often I am running in circles and not getting anywhere. I spend
forever "doing" things and yet I know I am not achieving anything. I
am going nowhere in my life!
"Be still and know that I am God." I need to stop. I need to listen to
the pain that is within. I need to relax in my gratitude. I need to rest in
myself. Tomorrow has not yet come -- today I take time for me.
Lord, I hear Your still small voice. Today I rest in me and discover
Thee.
************************************************** *********
"We ought to obey God rather than men."
Acts 5:29
He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools
shall be destroyed.
Proverbs, 13:20
"I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he
considered me faithful, appointing me to his service."
I Timothy 1:12
"To the man who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and
happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing
up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is
meaningless, a chasing after the wind."
Ecclesiastes 2:26
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Get rid of the excuses for not doing those things that make you happy. Lord,
Your peace within me calms my spirit and opens my heart to recognize the joy
of this day.
Forget the useless and unhealthy things of your past that clutter your mind so
that you can live a life that is alive and vibrant. Lord, help me to discard all
that clouds my day so that I am able to live the life that You intend me to live.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Right Back Up
"There is something in our self-destructive personalities that cries for failure."
Basic Text, p.77
"Poor me; woe is me; look at me, my life is such a mess! I've fallen, and no matter how hard I try, I continue to fail!" Many of us came to NA singing this sad refrain.
Life isn't like that anymore. True, sometimes we still stumble; at times we even fall. Sometimes we feel like we can't move forward in our lives, no matter how hard we try. But the truth of the matter is that, with the help of other recovering addicts in NA, we find a hand to pull us up, dust us off, and help us start all over again. That's the new refrain in our lives today. No longer do we say, "I'm a failure and I'm going nowhere!" Usually, it's more like, "Rats! I hit that same bump in the road of life again. Pretty soon I'll learn to slow down or avoid it entirely!" Until then, we may continue to fall down occasionally, but we've learned that there's always a helping hand to set us on our feet again.
Just for today: If I begin to cry failure, I'll remember there is a way to move forward. I will accept the encouragement and support of NA.
pg. 281
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Let me fly, says little birdie,
Mother, let me fly away.
--Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Don't we all want to fly away? Isn't there a better place out there away from home? The boy can't fly, but he can climb a tree and ride the wind. The girl, high on imaginary wings, flies to her own land of dreams. Even mothers and fathers, together and alone, need to fly--away from work, house, and the everyday same old things. But we all need to return as well. We need to know that home is the one safe place to land, that there we can rest, recover our strength, tell our tales to family and friends.
Our home is safe and comfortable, but if we never leave, even for a short while, we will never take the action necessary to bring our dreams to life.
What small comfort might I give up for today in order to make a dream come true?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
What I have wanted is consistency, ever since the day back in Wyncote when my mom and dad split. I have wanted to be liked. I have wanted to be loved. I have wanted to be in a family type atmosphere. --Reggie Jackson
How many of us gave ourselves away trying to fix painful childhood longings? We thought if we were good boys, good men, caretakers, we would have the love we wanted. Sadly, our remedies for childhood pain have often been childish solutions. Our need for security may have become a self centered obsession and blocked our ability to hear our loved ones. We may have become so fervent about accepting others that we failed to stand up for ourselves and lost their respect.
Most of us reach adulthood with leftover pain no person could ever fix. We learn grown up responses by accepting our load of pain and by asking others for help. Intimacy and companionship reduce the weight. We tell our friends about our burdens, and we learn what they are carrying. In the process we grow in wisdom and maturity.
Today. I will remember I do not have to be alone with my pain.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The wisdom of all ages and cultures emphasizes the tremendous power our thoughts have over our character and circumstances. --Liane Cordes
"As we think, so we are." We are gifted with the personal power to make thoughtful choices and thus decide whom we are. Our actions and choices combine to create our character, and our character influences the circumstances of our lives.
Our personal mind power will work to our advantage when we think positively, or it will contribute to our disadvantage. Imagining our good fortunes will prepare us for them. Imagining the successful completion of a task heightens and strengthens the commitment we must make daily to it. Imagining the steps necessary to the successful accomplishment of any goal directs our efforts so we don't falter along the way. Our minds work powerfully for our good. And just as powerfully to our detriment, when fears intrude on all our thoughts.]
The program has given me positive personal power; it lies in the relationship I have with my higher power. My outlook and attitude toward life reveals the strength of my connection to God. I will work with God and imagine my good fortune today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Temporary Setbacks
Sometimes, after we begin recovery, things in our life seem to get worse for a time. Our finances, our relationships, or our health may seem to deteriorate.
This is temporary; this is a normal part of recovery and healing. It may be the way things will be for a time, but not for long.
Keep working at recovery, and the trend will reverse. Before too long, things, and us, will be better than they were before. This time, the foundation will be solid.
God, help me trust You and recovery, even when I have setbacks. Help me remember that the problems are temporary, and when they are solved, I will be on more solid ground.
Today I'm living according to my truth, knowing that freedom and happiness are the result. --Ruth Fishel
******************************
Journey To The Heart
Freeze Negative Energy
Police officers often say “Freeze!” when they want someone to stop, when they want to protect themselves. We can do the same thing. We can learn to freeze unwanted energy that comes to us from others.
Health professionals agree there are many causes of stress in our lives, from toxins in the air to problems related to love, money, self-esteem, or work. One subtle problem that can cause undesirable stress– an area we often overlook– is when people direct negative energy at us. We can learn to become aware of, and protect ourselves from, undesirable negative energy that others may unconsciously, or even consciously, be directing toward us– whether they’re feeling angry, resentful, jealous, or downright hateful. We don’t have to absorb the impact of that energy, and let it harm us.
We can freeze negative energy. We can mentally tell it to stop and refuse to take it in and make it ours. If something is really bothering us, try this trick one healer taught me. Draw a picture of the person or write a description of the problem, then stick it in the freezer underneath the bottom tray.
People are energy. Thoughts are energy. Part of loving ourselves is not ingesting toxins. Negative energy is toxic. Don’t stress others.
*****
more language of letting go
Own your life
Are you willing to take responsibility for this mat, to own it? That doesn't mean it isn't everybody else's mat,too. If you're big enough to own the mat as yours, you're big enough to let it be theirs,too.
--George Leonard
In his book The Way of Aikido, George Leonard wrote about the concept of owning the mat. He was talking about aikido. He was referring to an air of ownership, a certain presence he learned to demonstrate both on the mats while practicing martial arts and in his life.
Many subtle attitudes and past conditioning can affect our sense of ownership of our lives and of the world we live in-- guilt, a haunting sense of victimization, laziness, living with repressive, angry, or abusive people may have tamed our sense of ownership of our lives.
One day, I was at my daughter's house. She had recently acquired a new dog, Stanley. Stanley huddled in the corner timidly instead of scampering over to greet me like her other dog did.
"We got Stanley from the pound," Nichole explained. "His previous owners abused him real badly. He's afraid to move around too much. He's afraid he'll get hit. So he sits real quietly, hoping not to make anyone mad."
I thought, That dog reminds me of me.
Let go of negative conditioning. No matter what happened, today is a new day. And it's your lucky day. You've just received an inheritance. You now own your world-- your life, your emotions, your finances, your relationships, your decisions. Walk onto the mat of your life with an air of confidence. Welcome others graciously because it's their world,too. Whether you're walking into your cubicle at work or pushing a shopping cart down the aisle at the grocery store, stand tall, move from your center, and walk with an open heart.
Welcome to your world.
God, teach me what it means to live and let live.
Activity: Review each of these areas of your life: work, relationships, finances, leisure time, emotions, your body, and your spiritual growth. Have you forfeited or given up ownership in any of these areas? If you have, today's a good day to take it back.
*****
Seasons of Beauty
Aging Gracefully by Madisyn Taylor
As we cultivate our life, our beauty becomes as much about what we are creating and doing as it is about our appearance.
We tend to associate youth with beauty, but the truth is that beauty transcends every age. Just as a deciduous tree is stunning in all its stages—from its full leafy green in the summer to its naked skeleton during winter and everything in between—human beings are beautiful throughout their life spans.
The early years of our lives tend to be about learning and experiencing as much as we possibly can. We move through the world like sponges, absorbing the ideas of other people and the world. Like a tree in spring, we are waking up to the world. In this youthful phase of life, our physical strength, youth, and beauty help open doors and attract attention. Gradually, we begin to use the information we have gathered to form ideas and opinions of our own. As we cultivate our philosophy about life, our beauty becomes as much about what we are saying, doing, and creating as it is about our appearance. Like a tree in summer, we become full, expressive, beautiful, and productive.
When the time comes for us to let go of the creations of our middle lives, we are like a tree in autumn dropping leaves, as we release our past attachments and preparing for a new phase of growth. The children move on, and careers shift or end. The lines on our faces, the stretch marks, and the grey hairs are beautiful testaments to the fullness of our experience. In the winter of our lives, we become stripped down to our essence like a tree. We may become more radiant than ever at this stage, because our inner light shines brighter through our eyes as time passes. Beauty at this age comes from the very core of our being—our essence. This essence is a reminder that there is nothing to fear in growing older and that there is a kind of beauty that comes only after one has spent many years on earth. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
In times past, even as adults, many of us childishly insisted that people protect, defend and care for us. We acted as if the world owed us a living. And then, when the people we most loved became fed up, pushing us aside or perhaps abandoning us completely,m we were bewildered. We couldn’t see that our over-dependence on people was unsuccessful because all human beings are fallible; even the best of them will sometimes let us down, especially when our demands are unreasonable. Today, in contrast, we rely upon God, counting on Him rather than on ourselves or other people. Am I trying to do as I think God would have me do, trusting the outcome of His will for me?
Today I Pray
May I know, from the dependencies of my past, that I am a dependent person. I depended on alcohol, mood-altering chemicals, food or other addictive pursuits. I was inclined to “hang” on other people, depending on them for more than they could give. May I, at last, switch from these adolescent dependencies to a mature healthy dependency on my Higher Power.
Today I Pray
I have more than one dependency.
******************************
One More Day
…We love persons . . . by reason of their defects as well as of their qualities.
– Jacques Maritain
There is a freedom in loving and being loved. The love we have for other special people frees us to concentrate on them, and we forget ourselves and our problems. Often, these people — our friends and family members — are loved by us not because we find perfection in them but because we magically seem to blend together, and their faults become unimportant.
In being loved, we discover the same freedom. We don’t have to conceal our defects. We can be open. Certainly, we continue to work to free ourselves of defects, but we do it for ourselves; we don’t have to be perfect to deserve love. Nonjudgmental love is one of the things that frees us to make choices without fear.
I treasure all the living friendships I have. They allow me to choose new directions by accepting me where I am.
************************************************** *******************
Food For Thought
We Admit
Three of the Twelve Steps have to do with admitting. We admit that we are powerless over food and cannot manage our own lives; we admit our wrongs to God, ourselves, and another person; we continue to take inventory and admit when we are wrong.
Out of honest admission of our weakness comes strength. We are able to see ourselves realistically and with clarity. When we are humble enough to admit our wrongs, we get rid of the false front we had tried to maintain. This frees us to be who we are, without pretense.
When we admit our faults, we are cleansed. We no longer have to try to hide and cover up our weaknesses and mistakes. Instead of pretending to be perfect, we can be human and satisfied with progress.
We admit that we have a progressive disease, and we learn how to control it. We do not pretend to ourselves or others that we can eat like everyone else, because we are compulsive overeaters. We cannot manage our own lives, but there is One who can.
I admit that I am powerless, and I am grateful for Your Power in my life.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
Patience
“Patience and perseverance have a magical effect
before which difficulties and obstacles vanish.”
John Quincy Adams
When I first walked through the meeting doors, I wanted recovery and I wanted it now! Give me the magic wand, I’ll waive it, then get on with my life. At least that’s what I thought.
One of the most difficult things I’ve had to learn is the art of patience and allowing God to work within his own time while I do the footwork to the best of my ability. It is my belief that the universe and my Higher Power will order the next level of my physical recovery. Physical recovery does not grow without spiritual progress. This Program is a journey, not a crash-course in fad dieting.
When I struggled with bouts of pride connected to my levels of patience and God’s timing, I knew I was uncovering yet another character flaw that could delay my spiritual recovery. Spiritual recovery, as “Old-timers” have told us again and again, is the actual foundation of the program. The inner-person will eventually make its way to the outer-person.
One day at a time...
Today I will slow down, take a deep breath, and just remind myself that my Higher Power is in control and that my natural pattern will develop under His nurture, care, and control.
~ January
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
No words can tell of the lonliness and despair I found in that bitter morass of self-pity. Quicksand stretched around me in all directions. I had met my match. I had been overwhelmed. Alcohol was my master. - Pg.8 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is a fundamental unity that underlies the fellowship of our programs. It is this unity that can comfort us and help us hold on when we want a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort more than we want this new unfamiliar life.
God, as I understand You, show me how to take comfort from the unity of fellowship when drugs call me back.
Help is Not Always Help
I watched those I love sink further and further into a disease and it was extremely painful to witness. I watched those I love steep in denial, coming up with a new set of rationalizations for each manifestation of the disease and I felt deep frustration and sometimes despair at their unwillingness to see the reality that was growing like yeast before their eyes. It hurt to hear them use rationalizations to let themselves off the hook. But those rationalizations, that denial was their disease. It was infuriating to watch them go about their day seemingly free of the kinds of anxieties and worries that I was experiencing because their denial was working so well for them. It was enraging. It left me feeling completely helpless, frustrated and alone. It made me want to scream at everyone. But I fixed instead to make the feeling go away. When I fix to make my own pain go away, it doesn't work. The 'help' I give is too loaded down with my own pain and the messages get muffled.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The difference between self-love and self-conceit is very important. Self-love is a healthy appreciation of God's gift to you. Conceit is comparing yourself to others and finding them lacking.
I do not climb the mountain so that I can look down on others.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Patience is giving God space.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am learning to trust my intuition and I am willing to act on this inner guidance.
I am taking positive and healthy actions today and my life is getting better and better.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
You go to a meeting and in ten minutes you're telling a complete stranger things you wouldn't tell a priest. - Doug D.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 29, 2018 8:41:19 GMT -5
sees cared about me. What I had thought was
gratitude was more like love. They wanted me to be
happy, to grow and remain sober. Knowing how they felt
kept me from drinking more than once. Second, I
discovered that I was able to love someone else
responsibly, with respectful and genuine concern for
that person's growth. Before that time, I had thought
that my ability to care sincerely about another's
well-being had atrophied from lack of use. To learn
that I can love, without greed or anxiety, has been
one of the deepest gifts the program has given. Gratitude
for that gift has kept me sober many times.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
For the past two months we have been studying passages
and steps from the Big Book. Now why not read the book
itself again? It is essential that the A.A. program become
part of us. We must have its essentials at our finger tips.
We cannot study the big book too much or too often. The
more we read it and study it, the better equipped we are
to think A.A., act A.A., and live A.A. We cannot know too
much about the program. The chances are that we will never
know enough. But we can make as much of it our own as
possible. How much of the Big Book have I thoroughly mastered?
Meditation For The Day
We need to accept the difficulties and disciplines of life
so as to fully share the common life of other people. Many
things that we must accept in life are not to be taken so
much as being necessary for us personally, as to be experienced
in order that we may share in the sufferings and problems of
humanity. We need sympathy and understanding. We must share
many of the experiences of life, in order to understand and
sympathize with others. Unless we have been through the same
experiences, we cannot understand other people or their makeup
well enough to be able to help them.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may accept everything that comes my way as part
of life. I pray that I may make use of it in helping my fellow men.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Honesty And Recovery, p.270
In taking an inventory, a member might consider questions such as
these:
How did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other
people and me? What people were hurt, and how badly? Just how
did I react at the time? Did I burn with guilt? Or did I insist that I
was the pursued and not the pursuer, and thus absolve myself?
How have I reacted to frustration in sexual matters? When
denied, did I become vengeful or depressed? Did I take it out on
other people? If there was rejection, or coldness at home, did I
use this as a reason for promiscuity?
*******************************
Let no alcoholic say he cannot recover unless he has his family
back. His recovery is not dependent upon people. It is dependent
upon his relationship with God, however he may define Him.
1. 12 & 12 ,pp. 50-51
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 99-100
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
The Role of self-sufficiency
Success
When AA was first launched, the ideal of the self made person was often exalted. Certain outstanding individuals seem to have achieved amazing success entirely by their own efforts. In the drive to be such a self made person, AA co-founder Bill W. was swept away in a torrent of alcoholic grandeur.
We know today that there's no such thing as a self-made person. We all need each other, and at various times we would have been lost without assistance taht was generously and freely given. Everyone has had such assistance at one time or anotehr. WE are not entirely self-sufficient.
The true role of self-sufficiency is to use our talent and opportunities wisely and beneficially in cooperation with others. Our own success in whatever we do will be enhanced as we continue to acknowledge our need for others.
Throughout the day, there will be many times when I need the help of others, and many times when others will need my help. I will give and receive help gratefully.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
I can honestly say that I was never affected by the question of the success of an undertaking. If I felt it was the right thing to do, I was for it regardless of the possible outcome.
—Golda Meir
Living a principled life is what the inner self desires. It's what God desires. And it's what the healthier ego desires. Living the program's principles is giving each of us practice in living a principled life, one that is free of guilt for our shortcomings.
Having principles assures direction. We need not ponder long how to proceed in any situation, what decision to make regarding any matter, when we are guided by principles. They offer us completeness. They help us define who we are and who we will be, in any turn of events.
As women, particularly as recovering women, we have struggled with self-definition. Often we were as others defined us, or we merely imitated those close by. Sometimes we may slip into old behavior and lose sight of who we are and how we want to live. It's then that the program's principles come immediately to our aid.
There is no doubt about how today should be lived. I will do it with confidence and joy.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Honesty is the backbone of our recovery program. Honesty opens us up. It breaks down the walls we had built around our secret world. Those walls made a prison for us. But all of that is now changed. We are free.
Honesty has made us wise. We aren’t sneaking drinks anymore. We don’t have a stash to protect.
People who didn’t trust us now depend on our honesty. People who worked hard to avoid us, now seek us out. Self-honesty is the greatest gift we can give ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You are truth. I pray that I may not turn away from truth. I will not lie. My life depends on honesty.
Action For the Day: For twenty or thirty minutes, I will think about how learning to be honest has changed my life.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
So we think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness. Outsiders are sometimes shocked when we bust into merriment over a seemingly tragic experience out of the past. But why shouldn’t we laugh? We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others.
p. 132
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I took a pitiful sales job that paid next to nothing, so I continued to live with my parents. I kept this job for two years for one reason--it allowed me to drink with minimal interference. My pattern was to pick up a fifth of whiskey somewhere during my round of appointments and keep it under the car seat with me. When I got home in the evening, I drank at least half the fifth in front of the television set and watched reruns until I passed out. And I did this every night, by myself, for almost two years. I had become a daily isolated drinker and was starting to get a little nervous.
p. 321
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
"This is the Step that separates the men from the boys." So declares a well-loved clergyman who happens to be one of A.A.'s greatest friends. He goes on to explain that any person capable of enough willingness and honesty to try repeatedly Step Six on all his faults--without any reservations whatever--has indeed come a long way spiritually, and is therefore entitled to be called a man who is sincerely trying to grow in the image and likeness of his own Creator.
p. 63
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The gift we can offer others is so simple a thing as hope.
--Daniel Berrigan
Until you value yourself, you won't value your time.
Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.
--M. Scott Peck
"This above all; to thine own self be true."
--William Shakespeare
The most important things in life aren't things.
H = Help others develop their potential. The possibilities and
rewards are endless.
E = Enlist people to help you. Having a support system improves
your ability to get the results you want.
A = Action keeps you moving forward. Do a little bit every day
and eventually you'll get to your goal.
R = Reach deep inside to find your strength. It's there if you
are willing to be courageous.
T = Trust the process. Rome wasn't built in a day. It takes time
to reap the benefits.
--Carol Gegner
Let there be more joy and laughter in your living.
--Eileen Caddy
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MISTAKES
"Good people are good because
they've come to wisdom through
failure."
-- William Saroyan
Today I am able to learn from my mistakes because I can see that they
really were mistakes! I was trying to play the game of life without a
full deck. My big mistake in life was trying to drink alcohol like a
non-alcoholic. I couldn't do it.
Drugs do not think; they react. They always work, and for me they
worked against me. Most of my failures in life stemmed from a
fundamental misconception -- alcoholics cannot drink like
non-alcoholics! This I now accept. And in a strange way that is difficult
to explain, I am a stronger person for having lived through my
alcoholism. God has become more real, the world is more
comprehensible, my life is more understandable because of the pain.
If a part of "goodness" is knowing that you are not perfect, then on a
daily basis I am becoming a good person.
God, who has created a world in which there is pain and failure, help
me to accept both as vehicles to wisdom.
************************************************** *********
“Come to me all of you who are tired and have heavy loads, and I will
give you rest. Accept my teachings and learn from me, because I am
gentle and humble in spirit, and you will find rest for your lives. The
teaching I ask you to accept is easy; the load I give you to carry is
light.”
Matthew 11:28-30
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him
must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.
Hebrews 11:6
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Daily Inspiration
Allowing yourself to be less than perfect allows you to accomplish great things in small ways. Lord, may I remove the pressure I overwhelming place on myself and do what I can when I can.
When one door shuts, immediately begin looking for the others that are opening. Lord, thank You for Your unceasing care and generosity.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Hope
"Gradually as we become more God-centered than self centered, our despair turns to hope."
Basic Text, p.92
As using addicts, despair was our relentless companion. It colored our every waking moment. Despair was born of our experience in active addiction: No matter what measures we tried to make our lives better, we slid ever deeper into misery. Attempts we made to control our lives frequently met with failure. In a sense, our First Step admission of powerlessness was an acknowledgment of despair.
Steps Two and Three lead us gradually out of that despair and into new hope, the companion of the recovering addict. Having accepted that so many of our efforts to change have failed, we come to believe that there is a Power greater than ourselves. We believe this Power can - and will - help us. We practice the Second and Third Steps as an affirmation of our hope for a better life, turning to this Power for guidance. As we come to rely more and more on a Higher Power for the management of our day - to - day life, the despair arising from our long experiment with self-sufficiency disappears.
Just for today: I will reaffirm my Third Step decision. I know that, with a Higher Power in my life, there is hope.
pg. 282
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
One is happy as a result of one's own efforts, tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and, above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream, of that I now feel certain. --George Sand
"We always go get a hot fudge sundae after the school choir concert," the girl said. Her parents laughed because their daughter said always, and they had only gone to a school choir concert once. Then the parents realized that the girl really had a great idea.
"Yes," the mother said, "we always get a sundae because we like to make up new traditions. We'll have to be sure and do it tonight so we don't let the tradition fall apart before it even gets started!"
They all laughed together and started debating which restaurant had the best hot fudge sundae.
We all need to have special traditions with our families. We need celebrations that have nothing to do with official holidays. Family holidays can mean so much more to us sometimes because they celebrate our shared experiences in life and become the source of happy memories for a lifetime.
What tradition can I start today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Life itself is the proper binge. --Julia Child
The Twelve Steps are a suggested program of recovery, not a cure. We can follow them and live a healed life, but we never develop immunity to our addictions and codependency. We remain vulnerable to slips, binges, and a return to old behaviors. If that has happened to us, our first need is to find a way back to the program. A slip may speak the blatant truth we avoided before. A man's complete honesty following a slip has sometimes been the way to renewed knowledge of his powerlessness. There is no value in feeling more shame and self hate in the aftermath of a slip. We need to accept we are incomplete and imperfect human beings. Recovery will come, not from shame, but from honestly accepting our powerlessness and the help we need.
The promise of recovery in this program, a healed life, is just as available after a slip as it ever was. It takes absolute commitment, a willingness to face the pain and hardship. Then we are freed again to engage fully in the joy and the awe of life.
I ask that my compulsions and my weaknesses be lifted from me. I'm not able to cure myself, but I pray for help.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I can honestly say that I was never affected by the question of the success of an undertaking. If I felt it was the right thing to do, I was for it regardless of the possible outcome. --Golda Meir
Living a principled life is what the inner self desires. It's what God desires. And it's what the healthier ego desires. Living the program's principles is giving each of us practice in living a principled life, one that is free of guilt for our shortcomings.
Having principles assures direction. We need not ponder long how to proceed in any situation, what decision to make regarding any matter, when we are guided by principles. They offer us completeness. They help us define who we are and who we will be, in any turn of events.
As women, particularly as recovering women, we have struggled with self-definition. Often we were as others defined us, or we merely imitated those close by. Sometimes we may slip into old behavior and lose sight of whom we are and how we want to live. It's then that the program's principles come immediately to our aid.
There is no doubt about how today should be lived. I will do it with confidence and joy.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Prayer
Here are some of my favorite prayers:
Help. Please. Don't.
Show me. Guide me. Change me.
Are you there?
Why'd you do that?
Oh.
Thank you.
Today, I will tell God what I want to tell God, and listen for God's answer. I will remember that I can trust God.
I am learning to trust my intuition and I am willing to act on this inner guidance. I am taking positive and healthy actions today and my life is getting better and better. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Forgiveness Will Complete the Process
“Do visit Bryce canyon,” a man advised. “But do it later, after you’ve driven through the other parts of Utah. It’s like the icing on the cake.” So it is with forgiveness. It’s the icing on this cake.
Forgiveness is a simple word, but a difficult, complicated process. Forgiveness is also essential if we want to find happiness and joy.
To forgive too soon, before we’ve felt all we needed to feel along the way, is incomplete. Forgiveness based on denial won’t work. And not to forgive, after we’ve felt our emotions– our anger, rage, pain, and betrayal– will harden our hearts and keep us closed. We’ll have loose ends to tie up, an unfinished connection to our past. We’ll have unfinished business with others, even though we may not see them, speak to them, or consciously think about them any longer. We won’t be free, and neither will they.
Sometimes we need to seek forgiveness because we’ve tried everything else and nothing works to bring us back to peace. Sometimes forgiveness finds us, unexpectedly transforming our hearts, softening us, opening us, and renewing our hearts and our relationships.
Sometimes forgiveness surprises us because it’s the last thing we thought we would need to feel whole again. Forgiveness is often the completion of the process. It’s the icing on the cake.
*****
more language of letting go
You're responsible for you
You can delegate tasks, but you can't delegate responsibility, if the responsibility is really yours.
Sometimes, it's normal to delegate tasks to other people. We may hire people to do certain things for us. We may engage in contracts with a therapist or a healer to help us work through a certain issue. But the responsibility for which pieces of advice we follow, and the decisions we make in our lives, ultimately belongs to us.
It's easy to get lazy. We can let a friend, an employee, or even a skilled therapist begin making our decisions for us. We can listen to what they say and blindly take their advice. Then we don't have to take responsibility for our lives. If the decision doesn't work out, we can say, "You were wrong. Look at the mess you've gotten me into. I'm a victim again."
Yes you are. But you're a victim of yourself.
We can listen to advice and let other people help us, but if they're helping us do something that is our responsibility, the ultimate responsibility for the decision still belongs to us.
Get help when you need it. Delegate tasks. But don't give away your power. Remember you can think, you can feel, you can take care of yourself, you can figure out your problems.
Don't get lazy. Don't give away responsibility for your life.
God, help me remember that I am responsible for me.
*****
Aging Parents
The Cycle of Life by Madisyn Taylor
When we begin to deal with parents that are aging, it can be a good time to examine your life together and familial past.
For most of us a natural part of the cycle of life is when our roles as children start to shift from that into caretaking roles where are parents are concerned. This can be as major moving a parent into a retirement facility, or coming to the realization that it’s necessary to check in with them more often than usual. Whatever the case, such a shift is momentous as it signals a time of confronting our own mortality as we confront that of our parents. In addition, it can bring up issues about how well they cared for us when we were young. We may also find ourselves consumed with fear at the thought of losing them, even if we’ve been on our own for a very long time.
Talking to other friends and family who are going through similar experiences can be a large source of support. They can help us look at both the unresolved past and the unfolding present, and we are free to talk only about ourselves. Sometimes we need the kind of undivided attention a friend can offer in order to deal with the material that comes up at this time of our lives.
In many ways, this time of life signals a rebirth as we examine our individual past, as well as our familial past. As our parents’ lives move toward completion, we are able to see what they did with their time on earth, what we have done so far with our time, and what we might want to do with the time we have left. These challenges and blessings are all part of the cycle of life. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Now that we’re free from our addictions, living life one day at a time, we can begin to stop making unreasonable demands upon those we love. We can show kindness where we had shown none; we can take the time and initiative to be thoughtful, considerate and compassionate. Even with the people we dislike, we can at least try to be courteous, at times literally going out of our way to understand and help them. Just For Today, will I try to understand rather than be understood, being courteous and respectful to all people with whom I’m in contact?
Today I Pray
May I never forget my old sponge-like self, who soaked up every drop of affection and attention my family or friends could give me, until they were sapped dry. May I learn to be a giver, rather than a constant taker. May I practice offering interest, kindness, consideration and compassion until sensitivity to others becomes second nature for me.
Today I Will Remember
Giving is part of being.
******************************
One More Day
A positive, responsible person does not forget the past harm which may have been done because of earlier ignorance, thoughtlessness, or emotional limitations.
– Lewis F. Presnall
We’ve learned to or give those who we felt had done harm to us. Our pain diminished over time, and we were able to let go of our bad feelings.
We are much less accepting of our own errors. Years later we may continue to mercilessly judge ourselves for past mistakes. We can forgive ourselves by offering ourselves the same understanding we have offered those we love. As we move to a new, gentler way of looking at ourselves, we can accept the mistakes we’ve made in the past and even understand them in context of where we were at the time.
I can remember past mistakes I have made, but I will be gentle with myself when I see how far I have come.
************************************************** *****************
Food For Thought
My Own Body
My body is where I live. Its size and shape is a matter between my Higher Power and me. No one else is responsible for my body. In the past, I may have permitted other people to influence what I ate and how much I weighed, but I now take full responsibility.
Other people may think that I am too fat or too thin, but that is their problem, not mine. I am learning what my body needs in order to operate at peak efficiency. I am learning to avoid the foods, which I do not handle well. What and how much I eat depends on my own preference and the requirements of my metabolism.
My body is a gift to me from my Higher Power. Maintaining it in the best possible condition is my response to God’s gift. No one else can tell me how best to maintain my body, since no one else is living in it or receives its inner signals. If I honestly interpret the signals, which come from my body, I will stay abstinent and healthy.
Thank You for my body.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
Others
“Those who have learned by experience
what physical and emotional pain and anguish mean
are a community all over the world…
One and all, they know the longing to be free from pain.”
Albert Schweitzer
Whether we isolate or are on the go constantly, whether we're in the disease or out of it, whether we've found all the Promises or we haven't, we are bonded for a lifetime by the disease of our addiction.
I was alone until I found other compulsive eaters. Yes, I had a family and friends and relatives and doctors and church and careers, but I was emotionally alone with this intricate, enigmatic, hellhole of a disease. The moment I met and connected with other compulsive eaters, my "real" life began.
One Day at a Time . . .
I share what I have learned with those who haven't.
I give what I have to give, and I get so much more.
~ Mari
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
There is, however, a vast amount of fun about it all. I suppose some would be shocked at our seeming worldliness and levity. But just underneath there is deadly earnestness. Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish. - Pg. 16 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
This hour may be rough. No one promised us a rose garden and if they did they were wrong. Recovery is not a thing like a rose garden; it is a process like the act of gardening. Right now we are tilling the soil; soon you will be planting seeds; later new growth will reach for the sun.
Let me know Higher Power, God as I understand You, that I can't reach for the sun until I've left the muck of addiction.
Distorted Reasoning
This disease distorted the reasoning of all around me. Because we were trying so hard to hide the pain of watching those we love become mired in the disease and losing our grip on our own happiness, we used our thinking to twist and bend the truth into a more palatable shape. We rationalized, denied what was right in front of us, made excuses and sometimes lied because it made us feel better than to admit the truth. The alcoholic lied to hide their uses and abuses, the family members lied to hide their fear, pain and confusion. We chose stinking thinking over the truth, lying to the world and to ourselves. Pretty soon, our thinking became so filled with denial and rationalization that we started to live by it. Eventually our sense of reality became distorted. Today, I am willing to live life on life's terms, not mine. I am able to tolerate the truth because I know that I have a program, I have accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things I can.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
They say the easiest way to stay clean and sober is to breathe in and breathe out and don't drink or drug in between. That leads to abstinence. Working the Steps leads to recovery.
Nothing is so bad that a drink or drug won't make it worse and nothing is so good that working my steps won't make it better.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Rather than giving others a piece of your mind, don't-and have peace of mind.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I love myself and all that I am today.
My fears are just one part of all that I am. I am a human being on a progressive path to recovery and every part of me is important in the making up of who I am.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Denial - Don't Even Notice I Am Lying. - Mickey B.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 29, 2018 8:42:23 GMT -5
September 29
Daily Reflections
EXACTLY ALIKE
Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is
the bright spot of our lives.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89
A man came to the meeting drunk, interrupted the speakers,
stood up and took his shirt off, staggered loudly back and
forth for coffee, demanded to talk, and eventually called
the group's secretary an unquotable name and walked out. I
was glad he was there--once again I saw what I still could
be. I don't have to be drunk to want to be the exception
and the center of attention. I have often felt abused and
responded abusively when I was simply being treated as a
garden variety human being. The more the man tried to insist
he was different, the more I realized that he and I were
exactly alike.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Having got this far, shall we pause and ask ourselves
some searching questions? We need to check up on ourselves
periodically. Just how good an A.A. am I? Am I attending
meetings regularly? Am I doing my share to carry the load?
When there is something to be done, do I volunteer? Do I
speak at meetings when asked, no matter how nervous I am?
Do I accept each opportunity to do twelfth-step work as a
challenge? Do I give freely of my time and money? Am I
trying to spread A.A. wherever I go? Is my daily life a
demonstration of A.A. principles? Am I a good A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
How do I get strength to be effective and to accept
responsibility? By asking the Higher Power for the strength
I need each day. It has been proved in countless lives that
for every day I live the necessary power shall be given me.
I must face each challenge that comes to me during the day,
sure that God will give me the strength to face it. For every
task that is given me, there is also given me all the power
necessary for the performance of that task. I do not need to
hold back.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may accept every task as a challenge.
I know I cannot wholly fail if God is with me.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
A.A. In Two Words, p.271
"All A.A. progress can be reckoned in terms of just two words:
humility and responsibility. Our whole spiritual development can
be accurately measured by our degree of adherence to these
magnificent standards.
"Ever deepening humility, accompanied by an ever greater
willingness to accept and to act upon clear-cut obligations--these are
truly our touchstones for all growth in the life of the spirit. They
hold up to us the very essence of right being and right doing. It is by
them that we are enabled to find and to do God's will."
Talk, 1965 (Printed In Grapevine, January 1966)
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
When should I be Grateful?
Gratitude
One spiritual writer believed that our only reason for gratitude should
be that we are part of God's universe. Others point out that gratitude
helps us, not God or the other people to whom we are grateful.
Their point is that it's not very uplifting simply to tie our gratitude to
certain gifts or benefits. Such gratitude is fairly shallow and is almost
no more than good manners. As recovering alcoholics, we need more
than that.
The best reason for gratitude is the outlook it creates as we cultivate it
within ourselves. We will actually feel mentally and physically uplifted if
we know true gratitude. This is the true spiritual outlook alcoholics seek
in the bottle but can find only in the new way of life.
I'll find ways to practice gratitude today without letting others know what
I'm doing.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Al didn’t smile for forty years. You’ve got to admire a man like that.
>From the TV show, “Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman”
Remember how we used to live? We were always trying to cover up some
lie or mistake.
We were all like Al. Our energy was going into our illness, not into living.
Gratitude is the key word in the program. Gratitude is being thankful for
the getting to know our Higher Power. Remember what it was like to not
smile for all those years?
Recovery has given us back our smiles. What a relief! We can relax and
enjoy our new life.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll always remember what is was like when
I was using. I pray that I’ll not take my recovery for granted. I prayer for gratitude.
Action For the Day: I will list all the things the program and recovery have
given me. I will smile about them today.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Female friendships that work are relationships in which women help each
other to belong to themselves. --Louise Bernikow
To have anything worth giving to a friend, we must belong to ourselves. Are
we someone we like? Does our behavior agree with our beliefs? Do our
friends share our values, and when we are together do we support one another?
If we don't like our own company, we will try to hide our real selves. The more
we hide, the further we are running from wholeness and health. We can assess
ourselves, calmly and lovingly, so that we can keep on becoming the women we
want to be. The more congruent are our behavior and our beliefs, the more we
belong to ourselves. The better we like ourselves, the better friends we can be.
The love and sympathy of my women friends can help me in my spiritual journey
toward serenity, and I can help theirs. Today, I will accompany others on their
journey, and thus find company for my own.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
Everybody knows that those in bad health, and those who seldom play, do not laugh much. So let each family play together or separately as much as their circumstances warrant. We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. We cannot subscribe to the belief that his life is a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of us. But it is clear that we made our own misery. God didn’t do it. Avoid then, the deliberate manufacture of misery, but if trouble comes, cheerfully capitalize it as an opportunity to demonstrate His omnipotence.
pp. 132-133
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
My behavior at this point was textbook: I was stashing bottles all over the house; sneaking drinks from my parents' small supply when I ran out; rationing the number of bottles I threw away at the same time so the trash bags wouldn't clink; refilling my parents' vodka and gin bottles with water; and so on. I had also resorted to videotaping my favorite reruns while I was watching them because I always blacked out before the ending.
pp. 321-322
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
Of course, the often disputed question of whether God can--and will, under certain conditions--remove defects of character will be answered with a prompt affirmative by almost any A.A. member. To him, this proposition will be no theory at all; it will be just about the largest fact in his life. He will usually offer his proof in a statement like this: "Sure, I was beaten, absolutely licked. My own willpower just wouldn't work on alcohol. Change of scene, the best efforts of family, friends, doctors, and clergymen got no place with my alcoholism. I simply couldn't stop drinking, and no human being could seem to do the job for me. But when I became willing to clean house and then asked a Higher Power, God as I understood Him, to give me release, my obsession to drink vanished. It was lifted right out of me."
p. 63
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Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have.
--Hyman Judah Schactel
"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."
--Mother Theresa
"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in
your years."
--Abraham Lincoln
"Being rich isn't about money. Being rich is a state of mind. Some of
us, no matter how much money we have, will never be free enough to
take time to stop and eat the heart of the watermelon. And some of us
will be rich without ever being more than a paycheck ahead of the
game."
--Harvey B. Mackay
"If your eyes are blinded with your worries, you cannot see the beauty of the sunset."
--Krishnamurti
"Sometimes you have to get to rock bottom in order to see the right way back up."
--Kate Bell
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
BLACKOUTS
"It is human nature to think
wisely and act foolishly."
-- Anatole France
I experienced blackouts in my drinking. Often I would wake up and not
know where I had been, what I had said or what I had done. I would
awake to peer through windows searching for my car. I would
telephone to find out what time I had left the party and if anything had
happened. Often as I bathed I would discover bruises or bleeding from
an unremembered incident.
There were other times I knew what I had done, knew what I had said,
remembered how I behaved -- and yet still I went back for more. I
drank alcoholically for years because my pride would not allow me to
be alcoholic. I created the wisest excuses for staying sick!
Today my sobriety requires a wisdom that is based on reality.
Lord of action, teach me to place my feet alongside my best thinking.
************************************************** *********
"If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his
cross daily, and follow me."
Luke 9:23
A soft answer turneth away wrath; but grievous words stir up anger.
Proverbs 16:1
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Daily Inspiration
Start something you've been putting off or finish something you've started
so that you can remove the frustration that comes with procrastination.
Lord, help me in my little way to do my little part to make this day a little better.
With our blessings come responsibilities. Much is required of those to whom much
has been given. Lord, may I use my blessings to be a blessing to others.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Just For Today
"When we stop living in the here and now, our problems become magnified unreasonably."
Basic Text, p.96
"Just for today" - it's a comforting thought. If we try to live in the past, we may find ourselves torn by painful, disquieting memories. The lessons of our using are not the teachers we seek for recovery. Living in tomorrow means moving in with fear.
We cannot see the shape of the secret future, and uncertainty brings worry. Our lives look overwhelming when we lose the focus of today.
Living in the moment offers freedom. In this moment, we know that we are safe. We are not using, and we have everything we need. What's more, life is happening in the here and now. The past is gone and the future has yet to arrive; our worrying won't change any of it. Today, we can enjoy our recovery, this very minute.
Just for today: I will stay in the here and now. Today - this moment - I am free.
pg. 283
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When people envy me I think, Oh God, don't envy me, I have my own pains. --Barbra Streisand
A forest is full of many different kinds of trees--they are all sizes and shapes and shades of color. It is hard to imagine a pine tree wishing it was an oak. Or a fir tree envying the birch its white bark. Instead, each tree catches raindrops and reflects the sunshine in its own way.
We often find ourselves envying someone else. We think they have more money or more friends. We see them as better looking or luckier in some way than we are.
It is so easy to overlook our own gifts when we do this. We get fooled by what looks good and forget that all human beings have some weaknesses and pain, just like we do. Like the trees in the forest, we each have our own unique beauty and talents to offer. If we believe in ourselves, rather than envy those around us, we will grow green and tall in our own way.
What qualities do I have that someone might envy?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Life without idealism is empty indeed. We must have hope or starve to death. --Pearl Buck
Our ideals, the principles that order our lives, are essential to a healing life. Some of us have lived a pattern in which we did not know what we believed. If someone we liked stated a viewpoint, we might wear it for a while like a new shirt - but with no personal commitment. Others of us have indulged in negativism and hopelessness. Life is more fulfilling when we assert our beliefs and give ourselves to them. As human beings, we are unable to perfectly live out our beliefs, but we become whole men by giving our energies to the attempt.
Is beauty in music, art, and nature a worthwhile ideal for us? Are fairness and justice for all people what we value? Are love and brotherhood ideals we hold dear? When we dare assert these values in our lives, they are life giving to us. They mature us. Reaching for what is worthwhile, rather than cursing what is not, gives us a design for making all our choices, and we have hope.
I will dare to meet my negativism with my ideals. My spiritual health will give me life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Female friendships that work are relationships in which women help each other to belong to themselves. --Louise Bernikow
To have anything worth giving to a friend, we must belong to ourselves. Are we someone we like? Does our behavior agree with our beliefs? Do our friends share our values, and when we are together do we support one another?
If we don't like our own company, we will try to hide our real selves. The more we hide, the further we are running from wholeness and health. We can assess ourselves, calmly and lovingly, so that we can keep on becoming the women we want to be. The more congruent are our behavior and our beliefs, the more we belong to ourselves. The better we like ourselves, the better friends we can be.
The love and sympathy of my women friends can help me in my spiritual journey toward serenity, and I can help theirs. Today, I will accompany others on their journey, and thus find company for my own.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
The Importance of Money
We cannot afford to allow our focus in life to be money. That will not lead us into the abundance we're seeking. Usually, it will not even lead to financial stability.
Money is important. We deserve to be paid what we're worth. We will be paid what we're worth when we believe we deserve to be. But often your plans fail when our primary consideration is money.
What do we really want to do? What do we feel led to do? What are our instincts telling us? What do we feel guided to do? What are we excited about doing? Seek to find a way to do that, without worrying about the money.
Consider the financial aspects. Set boundaries about what you need to be paid. Be reasonable. Expect to start at the bottom, and work up. But if you feel led toward a job, go for it.
Is there something we truly don't want to do, something that goes against our grain, but we are trying to force ourselves into it "for the money?" Usually, that's a behavior that backfires. It doesn't work. We make ourselves miserable, and the money usually goes wrong too.
I have learned that when I am true to myself about work and what I need to be doing, the money will follow. Sometimes it's not as much as I want; sometimes I'm pleasantly surprised, and it's more. But I'm content, and I have enough.
Money is a consideration, but it cannot be our primary consideration if we are seeking spiritual security and peace of mind.
Today, I will make money a consideration, but I will not allow it to become my primary consideration. God, help me be true to myself and trust that the money will follow.
I love myself and all that I am today. My fears are just one part of all that I am. I am a human being on a progressive path to recovery and every part of me is important in the making up of who I am. --Ruth Fishel
*****
Journey to the Heart
Do Something Nice for Someone Today
Why wait for Christmas? Do something nice for someone today. Give a gift, even when it isn't someone's birthday. Give a gift of love and joy.
Feeling down? Frustrated? Instead of depriving yourself when you already feel bad enough, do something nice for yourself. Love yourself. Be kind, gentle, and nurturing to yourself. Treat yourself to a new book, a bouquet of flowers, a sweater, or a hat-- something that will bring you joy. Take yourself to a movie. Or give yourself a free gift of love-- a walk, a bath, a relaxing afternoon in the sun. Send a card to yourself. Give yourself comforting, encouraging words. Tell yourself how well you've done and that you've done your best.
Give words of love and encouragement to others,too. Tell them you appreciate them. Tell them you think they're wonderful. Tell them they're perfect. When you give gifts of love to others, you give them to yourself.
Sometimes, the gift people need is words of love. "I pray for you every morning," my friend told me. "I ask God to bless you and help you. Then I talk to your angels. I tell them to take special care of you all day long and bring you lots of joy." That's one of the nicest gifts I've ever received.
You don't have to wait for Christmas to give gifts of love and joy. Give that love to others and yourself. Give it often. Give it freely. Give it all year round.
*****
more language of letting go
Remember to take care of yourself
Jenna started dating a new man. Like many women, she was a little frustrated with all the losers that had come along before. She thought she'd put this one to the test. She wanted to see how good he'd be to her.
So when he called her up and asked her what she wanted to do, she told him she thought he should take her on a little trip.
"Hawaii would be nice," she said. "You get us the tickets. And find someplace nice for us to stay when we get there. I don't want to be in a cheesy hotel."
He had enough money in the bank. The trip, she thought, would be exquisite and luxurious. She envisioned the first-class air travel, the limos, and the home he'd rent complete with maid service and a cook.
When the day of the trip arrived, they took a taxi, not a limo, to the airport. And when she boarded the airplane, he led her back to coach. When the flight attendant came around asking if people wanted to rent movies, her boyfriend shook his head and went back to reading his book. She had to dig out the four dollars to pay for the movie.
She sat scrunched up in her seat, all the way to Hawaii. When they got there, he took her to a time-share condo. Then he drove her in the rental car to the grocery store and said, "Pick out what you want to cook."
Throughout the vacation she spent a lot of time stewing in her head, but when they got home, she decided to give him one more chance.
So when he called her up and asked her what she wanted to do Friday night, she said she thought a movie would be nice. She hung up the phone, then dressed up and did her hair. She thought maybe he'd take her to a nice theater.
He picked her up, then drove to the nearest Blockbuster. "Go in and pick out whatever video you'd like to rent," he said. "Do you want to watch it at your place or mine?
The moral of this story is twofold and simple. The first lesson is if you know exactly what you want, you need to spell it out clearly. The second is that it's better not to expect people to take care of us. Even if they agree to do it, we might not like how they do the job.
While it's nice to have people love us and do things for us, it's better to plan on taking care of ourselves.
God, help me remember that it's my job to take care of myself.
*****
The Light at the End of the Tunnel
Nothing Is Insurmountable
When our next best course of action seems unclear, any dilemmas we face can appear insurmountable. Yet there is nothing we cannot overcome with time, persistence, focused thought, help, and faith. Whatever the situation or problem, there is always a solution. And if you remember to look within, even as you search around you for the “right” course of action, you will be able to center yourself, clear your mind, and see that nothing has to be impossible.
The first step in overcoming any obstacle is to believe that it can be overcome. Doing so will give you the strength and courage to move through any crisis. The second step is to make a resolution that you can prevail over any chaos. Enlist your support network of family and friends if necessary. The more minds there are to consider a problem, the more solutions can be found. Don’t discount ideas just because they seem impractical or “unrealistic,” and don’t keep searching for the “best” alternative. Often there is no “best” choice, there is only a choice to make so we can begin moving beyond whatever is obstructing our path. At the very least, making a choice, even if isn’t the ideal one, can give you a sense of peace before you have to figure out what your next course of action will be.
If you feel overwhelmed by the scope of your troubles, you may want to think of other people who have turned adversity into triumph. We often gain a fresh perspective when we remember others who have overcome larger obstacles. It can be inspiring to hear of their victories, helping us remember that there is always light at the end of every tunnel. It is during our darkest hours that we sometimes need to remind ourselves that we don’t have to feel helpless. You have within and around you the resources to find a solution to any problem. And remember that if a solution or choice you make doesn’t work, you are always free to try another. Believe that you can get through anything, and you will always prevail. Published with permission from Daily OM
******************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
In our first weeks or months in The Program, our shaky emotional condition sometimes affects our feelings toward old friends and family. For many of us, these relationships heal quickly in the initial stages of our recovery. For others, a time of “touchiness” seems to persist; now that we’re no longer drinking or using other chemicals, we have to sort out our feelings about spouse, children, relatives, employer, fellow workers, and even neighbors. Experience in The Program over the years has taught that we should avoid making important decisions early in our recovery — especially emotion-charged decisions about people. Am I becoming better equipped to relate maturely to other people?
Today I Pray
May God help me through the edginess, the confusion of re-feeling and re-thinking my relationships, the “getting-it-all-together” stages of my recovery. May I not rush into new relationships or new situations that demand and investment of my emotions — not yet.
Today I Will Remember
No entangling alliances too soon.
******************************
One More Day
Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our culture encourages a quest for outer beauty, even though we know it is more important to have inner beauty. This is the beauty truly valued by others. We can live joyfully; we can delight in discovering and enjoying beauty. We are surrounded with loveliness in nature and in people’s thoughts, words, and deeds. To accept that beauty, we must carry within ourselves a sensitivity, an appreciation for what is offered, and that sensitivity is a large part of the beauty we carry within us.
Life is full of beauty. I will keep my eyes open to the beauty that is in others, in nature, and in myself.
************************************************** ****************
Food For Thought
The Satisfaction of Work
Using our God-given talents and abilities to do the work He assigns us brings deep satisfaction. Many of us used to eat a lot of “idle bread” which we did not need. Now that we are eating less, we find that we derive satisfaction from working more.
Work is an opportunity to give away the gifts we are given. It is sharing which requires effort and discipline. If we do not work up to our maximum level of ability, our satisfaction is reduced. As we give away our gifts, we are given more.
Maintaining abstinence improves the quality of our work and increases our output. Instead of doing just enough to get by, we are challenged to give the best that we have. Abstaining from compulsive overeating can give us the courage and confidence to change jobs when necessary.
When we are emotionally upset, turning to a task, which absorbs us physically or mentally, or both can have a healing effect. Rather than a curse, work can be a blessing, especially when we realize that ultimately we are working with and for our Higher Power.
We give thanks for the satisfaction of work.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
Togetherness
“Take my hand, and no matter how dark the night,
the light of day will come, and we will share the tomorrow.”
Ken Grant
When we first walk into our recovery rooms, we are all afraid: afraid of more rejection, afraid of more failure, and afraid of more loneliness. Once we sit and listen, we realize that we are not much different than the other people there. We ease up, start sharing, begin trusting our Higher Power and ourselves more.
Our darkness of the past is drawn out by our sharing with other addicts. We realize our deep, dark secrets are not as bad as we thought.
We are not alone! Then hand-in-hand, we begin climbing the ladder of recovery and the light of day begins to shine brighter and brighter.
One Day at a Time . . .
When we let our guard down and let Higher Power
and other people in, we learn that at the end of a
dark day is the light of our next today. We learn
that together we can do what we can never do alone.
~ Jeanette
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If a person has cancer all are sorry for him and no one is angry or hurt. But not so with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes annihilation of all things worth while in life. It engulfs all whose lives touch the sufferer's. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents - anyone can increase the list. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Right now you don't have to pretend to be someone you are not. You don't have to pretend to be strong (if you're a man) or weak (if you're a woman). You don't have to pretend that you don't want to use, if you do--share what is real. We can't help if we don't know the truth.
Grant me the courage to simply be who I am, say what is real in my gut, and respond genuinely to others.
Hypervigilance
Living with this disease has been traumatic for me and for those I love. All of the symptoms of trauma have become a part of who we are. That's why we need to do so much work to recover. We're not just recovering from the disease of addiction, we're recovering from the symptoms of emotional and psychological trauma. My fear apparatus got very much overused in my family. I was constantly geared up for fight or flight. And when I couldn't do either of those I froze in my tracks, I went numb inside, I shut down. But all of that pain that I shut down stayed inside of me. It show up in my life as a delayed reaction, even though I am not still living under the same kind of stress as I did surrounded by active addiction, my body and mind carry the imprint of that trauma and over react. I live as if the stressor is still present. My old pain and anger are surfacing after the fact in a post traumatic stress reaction.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You spend more time with yourself than with anyone else. Doesn't it make sense to put something into that relationship?
I am my own best friend and value my own companionship.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Few of us realize that God is all we need until God is all we have.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am one of the miracles of this universe and I am connected to everything that was ever created.
I can pick up the phone or sit in quiet meditation, choosing to make a contact with a friend or with my Higher Power or with both.
Today I know that I am never alone.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm not one who says that sobriety is a life beyond my wildest dreams - I could have dreamed up something far wilder than this. - Lorna K.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 29, 2018 8:43:18 GMT -5
September 30
Daily Reflections
THE CIRCLE AND THE TRIANGLE
The circle stands for the whole world of A.A., and the triangle
stands for A.A.'s Three Legacies of Recovery, Unity, and Service.
Within our wonderful new world, we have found freedom from our
fatal obsession.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 139
Early in my A.A. life, I became employed in its services and
I found the explanation of our society's logo to be very
appropriate. First, a circle of love and service with a
well-balanced triangle inside, the base of which represents
our Recovery through the Twelve Steps. Then the other two sides,
representing Unity and Service, respectively. The three sides of
the triangle are equal. As I grew in A.A. I soon identified
myself with this symbol. I am the circle, and the sides of the
triangle represent three aspects of my personality: physical,
emotional sanity, spirituality, the latter forming the symbol's
base. Taken together, all three aspects of my personality
translate into a sober and happy life.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
There are no leaders in A.A., except as they volunteer to
accept responsibility. The work of carrying on A.A.--leading
group meetings, serving on committees, speaking before other
groups, doing twelfth-step work, spreading A.A. among the
alcoholics of the community--all these things are done on a
volunteer basis. If I don't volunteer to do something concrete
for A.A., the movement is that much less effective. I must do
my fair share to carry the load. A.A. depends on all its
members to keep it alive and to keep it growing. Am I doing my
share for A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
When you look to God for strength to face responsibility and
are quiet before Him, His healing touch causes the Divine
Quiet to flow into your very being. When in weakness you cry
to God, His touch brings healing, the renewal of your courage,
and the power to meet every situation and be victorious. When
you faint by the way or are distracted by feelings of inferiority,
then rely on the touch of God's spirit to support you on your way.
Then arise and go forth with confidence.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may lay myself open today to the healing touch of God.
I pray that I may not falter or faint by the wayside, but renew
my courage through prayer.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
A.A. In Two Words, p.271
"All A.A. progress can be reckoned in terms of just two words:
humility and responsibility. Our whole spiritual development can
be accurately measured by our degree of adherence to these
magnificent standards.
"Ever deepening humility, accompanied by an ever greater
willingness to accept and to act upon clear-cut obligations--these are
truly our touchstones for all growth in the life of the spirit. They
hold up to us the very essence of right being and right doing. It is by
them that we are enabled to find and to do God's will."
Talk, 1965 (Printed In Grapevine, January 1966)
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
How do we communicate?
Carrying the message.
What we are always carries a stronger message than what we say.
This is why we're sometimes turned off by people who seek to
overwhelm us with charm. It's also why we can sometimes be
drawn to people who are quiet and unassuming.
However it works, there is a powerful message in one's unspoken
thoughts and feelings. We can usually sense, for example, the
mood of people in a room, even when little is being said. If we
spend any time with others, they will soon know much about us
even if we say little.
This silent communication may be the great secret of AA's success
in reaching those who still suffer. If we are living sober and want to
help others, that's he message we give out. That's also a form of
carrying the message.
I'll communicate today by maintaining a warm and friendly attitude
toward every person I meet, knowing that thoughts and feelings
speak louder than words.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
If we follow the Twelve Steps, we’ll leave failure behind. We may
have tried and tired to be sober, good people, but failed if we were
doing it our way. Now is the time to stop listening to ourselves and
start listening to pros, those who have gone before us.
When we follow their lead, exciting changes happen. First we stay
sober. We regain self-respect. We meet people we respect and become
friends. Our families start to trust us again. And why? Because we gave
up doing it our way and listened. We listened to the experts.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, allow me to become an expert listener.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll find someone I respect and ask how
they work their program. I’ll ask them to share their wisdom.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn't people feel as free to delight
in whatever remains to them? --Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
We choose the lives we lead. We choose sadness or happiness; success
for failure; dread or excited anticipation. Whether or not we are conscious
of our choices, we are making them every moment.
Accepting full responsibility for our actions is one of the requirements of
maturity. Not always the easiest thing to do, but necessary to our further
development. An unexpected benefit of accepting our responsibility is
that it heightens our awareness of personal power. Our well being is
within our power. Happiness is within our power. Our attitude about
any condition, present or future, is within our power, if we take it.
Life is "doing unto us" only what we allow. And it will favor us with
whatever we choose. If we look for excitement, we'll find it. We can
search out the positive in any experience. All situations present seeds
of new understanding, if we are open to them. Our responses to the
events around us determine whatever meaning life offers. We are in
control of our outlook. And our outlook decides our future.
This day is mine, fully, to delight in--or to dread. The decision is always mine.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 9 - The Family Afterward
Now about health: A body badly burned by alcohol does not often recover overnight nor do twisted thinking and depression vanish in a twinkling. We are convinced that a spiritual mode of living is a most powerful health restorative. We, who have recovered from serious drinking, are miracles of mental health. But we have seen remarkable transformations in our bodies. Hardly one of our crowd now shows any dissipation.
p. 133
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
About this time the TV movie My Name Is Bill W., about the co-founder of A.A., was aired. Intrigued, I sat down with my whiskey and soda bottles to watch it. When Bill whipped out a flask in the car to bolster himself before his visit with his father-in-law, I heaved a sigh of relief. "Oh, I'm not that bad," I thought to myself. I then proceeded to get drunk and black out. I don't remember any more of the movie.
p. 322
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
In A.A. meetings all over the world, statements just like this are heard daily. It is plain for everybody to see that each sober A.A. member has been granted a release from this very obstinate and potentially fatal obsession. So in a very complete and literal way, all A.A.'s have "become entirely ready" to have God remove the mania for alcohol from their lives. And God has proceeded to do exactly that.
p. 64
************************************************** *********
Practicing the program, I learned to trust God, not just believe in Him.
--Ron C.
Let your ears hear what your mouth says.
--Jewish Proverb
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is
the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.
--Mark Twain
"Seek first to understand, then to be understood."
--Stephen Covey
"Truly, it is in darkness that one finds the light, so when we are in sorrow,
then this light is nearest to all of us." --Meister Eckhart
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PATIENCE
"Prayer of the modern
American: 'Dear God, I pray for
patience. And I want it right
now!'"
-- Oren Arnold
How I appreciate those times when I experience the gift of patience in
my life, not as often as I would like. That is an interesting point: I am
impatient about having patience!
Seriously, patience is when I recognize the need to "back off" -- allow
God into the driver's seat, resting in the knowledge that things happen
in God's time. This does not mean that I am not involved, but it allows
for God's comprehensive plan for His world. I can experience patience
usually when I get in touch with gratitude. Once I stop giving energy
to the "I wants", the joy of serenity breathes through my life and I
can rest. Sometimes I need to "stop" and say a loud and resonant
"thank you".
Lord, let me breathe these words into my life: "Thy will be done."
************************************************** *********
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and
rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for
yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy,
and where thieves do not break in and steal.”
Matthew 6:19-20
"Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of
doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the
Day approaching."
Hebrews 10:25
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Daily Inspiration
Change yourself and those around you will change too. Lord, help me to
be my best so that I can bring out the best in others.
Peace comes not from having no problems, but from being able to deal with
them. Lord, bless me with the confidence and wisdom to grow from life's challenges.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Being Ourselves
"Our real value is in being ourselves."
Basic Text, p.101
Over and over, we have tried to live up to the expectations of those around us. We may have been raised believing that we were okay if we earned good grades in school, cleaned our rooms, or dressed a certain way. Always wanting to belong and be loved, many of us spent a lot of time trying to fit in - yet we never quite seemed to measure up.
Now, in recovery, we are accepted as we are. Our real value to others is in being ourselves. As we work the steps, we learn to accept ourselves just as we are. Once this happens, we gain the freedom to become who we want to be.
We each have many good qualities we can share with others. Our experiences, honestly shared, help others find the level of identification they need to begin their recovery. We discover that we all have special gifts to offer those around us.
Just for today: My experience in recovery is the greatest gift I can give another addict. I will share myself honestly with others.
pg. 284
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The house, the stars, the desert--what gives them their beauty is something that is invisible. --Antoine de Saint Exupery
What makes our home special? Is it the shape of it, or whether or not we have carpeting? Probably not.
More likely, what makes us love a place is how we feel when we are there. Home is the familiarity of pleasant smells, activities, and special people.
And when we are caught by the beauty of the stars, isn't it something that happens inside us--the breathtaking feeling of joy that is so hard to describe? The beauty of a day or a special person in our lives cannot be captured, but it can fill and warm our hearts.
Can I measure beauty today by what I feel inside?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind. --William Blake
We seek the answer. Sometimes we think we have found a central truth and later learn that beneath it is another truth. Or what seemed so crucial as a guiding principle for our lives last year is still true but not as crucial. It is like trying to take a snapshot of a changing world while the camera itself is changing.
Some of us in our hunger for security grab for "absolute" truths, which are not absolute. We must continue forever to be eager learners. In stepping across a stream from one floating log to another, we must resist the temptation to become overcommitted to staying in an especially secure looking place, or we will never reach the opposite shore. Even the Twelve Steps of this program are given to us as a "suggested" program of recovery. It is a program that works because it takes us out of our rigid ways. We are continually made new. That is the vitality of the spiritual life.
God, help me to be open to new opinions - to things I had never thought of on my own.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn't people feel as free to delight in whatever remains to them? --Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
We choose the lives we lead. We choose sadness or happiness; success for failure; dread or excited anticipation. Whether or not we are conscious of our choices, we are making them every moment.
Accepting full responsibility for our actions is one of the requirements of maturity. Not always the easiest thing to do, but necessary to our further development. An unexpected benefit of accepting our responsibility is that it heightens our awareness of personal power. Our well being is within our power. Happiness is within our power. Our attitude about any condition, present or future, is within our power, if we take it.
Life is "doing unto us" only what we allow. And it will favor us with whatever we choose. If we look for excitement, we'll find it. We can search out the positive in any experience. All situations present seeds of new understanding, if we are open to them. Our responses to the events around us determine whatever meaning life offers. We are in control of our outlook. And our outlook decides our future.
This day is mine, fully, to delight in--or to dread. The decision is always mine.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Not a Victim
You are not a victim.
How deeply ingrained our self-image as a victim can be! How habitual our feelings of misery and helplessness! Victimization can be like a gray cloak that surrounds us, both attracting that which will victimize us and causing us to generate the feelings of victimization.
Victimization can be so habitual that we may feel victimized even by the good things that happen to us!
Got a new car? Yes, we sigh, but it doesn't run as well as I expected, and after all, it cost so much. . . .
You've got such a nice family! Yes, we sigh, but there are problems. And we've had such hard times. . ..
Well, your career certainly is going well! Ah, we sigh, but there is such a price to pay for success. All that extra paperwork. . . .
I have learned that, if we set our mind to it, we have an incredible, almost awesome ability to find misery in any situation, even the most wonderful of circumstances.
Shoulders bent, head down, we shuffle through life taking our blows.
Be done with it. Take off the gray cloak of despair, negativity, and victimization. Hurl it; let it blow away in the wind.
We are not victims. We may have been victimized. We may have allowed ourselves to be victimized. We may have sought out, created, or re created situations that victimized us. But we are not victims.
We can stand in our power. We do not have to allow ourselves to be victimized. We do not have to let others victimize us. We do not have to seek out misery in either the most miserable or the best situations.
We are free to stand in the glow of self-responsibility.
Set a boundary! Deal with the anger! Tell someone no, or stop that! Walk away from a relationship! Ask for what you need! Make choices and take responsibility for them. Explore options. Give yourself what you need! Stand up straight, head up, and claim your power. Claim responsibility for yourself!
And learn to enjoy what's good.
Today, I will refuse to think, talk, speak, or act like a victim. Instead, I will joyfully claim responsibility for myself and focus on what's good and right in my life.
I am one of the miracles of this universe and I am connected to everything that was ever created. I can pick up the phone or sit in quiet meditation, choosing to make a contact with a friend or with my Higher Power or with both. Today I know that I am never alone. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
September 30
You’re a Healer
The healing you give to the world can happen as gracefully and naturally as the pine trees touch and heal with their life, their presence. Arousing your senses, they fill you with their fragrance. Their presence changes your energy, calms your fears, let you know all is well.
Know you can stand tall, joyfully be who you are, and grow where you are. You have the ability to touch those around you in a way that heals them without hurting or draining you. One of your gifts to yourself and to the world is that of a healer. You don’t have to force it, strive to make it happen. It happens gently and naturally when you love and accept who you are.
Open to your healing powers, your ability to heal yourself and those around you. Receive this gift with joy, share it freely with all you meet. Open to your healing powers and you will cherish your past, all you have gone through and done.
Who you are is love. What love does is heal.
*****
more language of letting go
Own your power
I was in an airplane on the way up. I was doing my fidgeting thing, as usual. Brady Michaels, a stunt man and sky diver I had come to know and respect, was sitting across the aisle from me.
"How are you doing Melody," he asked in a gentle way, like he really wanted to know.
"I'm scared," I said.
"Do you believe in God?" he asked.
"Yes," I said.
"Well then walk to that door, jump, and pull your rip cord when it's time," he said. "And don't forget to have some fun,too,"
Owning our power can be one of the most illusive issues we face in recovery. How much is my part? When do I do it? How much is God's part? Which parts of my life am I responsible for, and which parts are destiny?
You can spend years in therapy talking about feelings, but that isn't the same as releasing your feelings and fears and moving forward in your life. You can go to college and train to do the thing you want to do in life. You can sleep every night with your wish list underneath your pillow. But that's different from stepping up to the plate and doing it, whether that means writing a romance novel, starting your own business, learning to bake a cake, or buying an easel and painting a picture. You can read all the travel books in the library-- but that's different from getting on an airplane and taking a trip to someplace you've always wanted to see.
We can go to a million Twelve Step meetings, but that's different from actually working each of the Steps.
As my favorite skydiving instructor, Andy, told me, there's three things to remember:
Gravity always works. The earth won't move out of your way. And God won't pull your rip cord.
We've surrendered our lives and will to the care of God. Now, it's time to learn what it means to align with and own our power.
God, help me own my power to take care of myself. Help me learn to do the job well.
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Letting Yourself Be Seen
Being Witnessed
When we allow ourselves to be witnessed by another, we cannot help but be transformed by the experience. Whether we are sharing a personal experience, standing in front of friends to celebrate a special occasion, or expressing our unbridled joy or sorrow in front of a loved one, we are allowing ourselves to be seen and experienced in a very intimate way. Not only are we baring ourselves to someone else, but we are allowing that person to hold a very specific kind of space with us so this powerful act can take place. To be witnessed is to let ourselves be seen as we truly are in that moment.
Our friends and loved ones can easily be witnesses for us, if only we are brave enough to let them. Your next birthday may be the perfect occasion to experience this sacred act: Invite your friends and loved ones to your special day. During the celebration, stand in front of them and thank them for being there for you. Feel their gratitude, attention, warmth, and support, while noticing the sense of safety you feel as they surround you. If you feel inspired, share your innermost thoughts about the day and your life. You may be surprised at the feelings of peace and validation that arise within you, when you feel safe enough to go deep into your soul and share yourself with those you trust.
Anyone who has ever seen love, admiration, acceptance, or appreciation reflected in a friend or loved one’s eyes knows how transformative that experience can be. When you bare yourself to another, you are giving them the gift of you and showing them that they also matter. In letting yourself be witnessed, you are letting others into your intimate space, stepping in the sacred container they have created for you, and creating a cauldron of positive affirmation, support, love, and goodwill that will stay with you forever. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
No matter what other people do or don’t do, we have to remain sober and free from other addictions for ourselves. When our program of recovery becomes contingent on the actions or inaction of another person — especially someone with whom we’re emotionally involved — the results are invariably disastrous. We need to also remember that intense dislike is as much an emotional involvement as new found romantic love. In short, we have to cool any risky emotional involvements in the first few months of our recovery, trying to accept the fact that our feelings could change quickly and dramatically. Our watch word must be “First Things First,” concentrating on our number one problem before anything else. Am I building a firm foundation while steering a firm foundation while steering clear of slippery emotional areas?
Today I Pray
May I always remember that healthy relationships with people are necessary for my recovery. But — that substituting an obsession with either a love or hate object is as dangerous to my well-being as any other addiction.
Today I Will Remember
A dependency is a dependency is a dependency.
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One More Day
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
– Elbert Hubbard
It would be tragic to live our lives without direction, to never try to fulfill any dreams. Perhaps we have felt we do not have direction in our lives any longer, or that we can’t fulfill the lifelong dreams we had. By setting new goals and priorities in terms of today’s reality, we can still have dreams and see them come true.
We might be tempted to resign ourselves to being failures, to set ourselves no new challenges, and to think of ourselves as victims. If we don’t become fatigued with thoughts of resignation and failure, we will have the necessary energy to pursue new goals.
I am setting new goals that are realistic, and I will invest my energy in them.
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Food For Thought
Perspective
When our vision was clouded by self-will, our perspective was narrow and subjective. We saw people and events only as they fostered or frustrated our egotistical concerns. The world was a frightening place, since we thought that our welfare was entirely dependent on our own efforts.
Coming to believe in a Higher Power gives us a new, broader perspective. We learn the security of trusting eternal values and moral principles. When we pray only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out, we begin to see ourselves as serving rather than surviving. Particular acts may or may not be successful from our point of view, but we can move on in confidence, knowing that our past, present, and future is in His hands.
The new perspective, which comes to us as we work the OA program, enables us to accept defeats as well as successes and irritations as well as satisfactions. All experience is for our growth and development.
Create in us a new perspective.
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One Day At A Time
SERVICE
“A single sunbeam is enough
to drive away many shadows.”
St. Francis of Assisi
There are many tools I use to maintain my abstinence, but none of them is as important to me as service. I do a lot of service, but it’s not for fame or glory: I do service in order to keep my program strong. I came into program for the first time back in college, and got there only because someone offered to give me a ride.
When we first walk into these rooms, we often feel lost and alone in the dark world of addiction. But at that very first meeting we hear people talk about their experience and strength, and a small glow of light comes into our view. All it takes is that "single sunbeam" and we have hope again and our world seems brighter.
As we keep coming back and working the Steps, we encounter lots of different sunbeams, and slowly the shadows in our lives are cast away and the world becomes bright again. It is then our responsibility to let our own light shine. One of the beauties of this program is that everyone can find a way to give service. Whether it be on the group or Intergroup level, whether by sponsoring or just making a call, whether by serving as secretary, treasurer, or just by helping to put chairs away after a meeting, there is a job for everyone.
No one should feel "unimportant." I’m sure that the lady who gave me a ride to my first few meetings didn’t feel like she was doing anything special, but she was the first sunbeam in my life. All these years later, her act of giving has ignited in me a burning desire to give back to others the miracle of this program.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will be unafraid to let my light shine.
Any act of service that I can give will not only help another, but will ensure that my own light does not burn out.
~ Laurel
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
At a certain point in the drinking of every alcoholic, he passes into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail. This tragic situation has already arrived in practically every case long before it is suspected. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Sometimes all we can do is not use, hold on, go to another meeting and tell them, 'I am not using, holding on, and going to another meeting because that's what you told me to do at times like these.' Our answers will come.
Help me take the steps necessary when times get tough, to do what the people in the program tell me to.
Healing Society
Today, I will light one candle and that candle is myself. I will keep my own flame burning. I turn my sight to light and love and goodness. For today, there is no need to be discouraged. So what if I see and identify all the ills of society and diagnose it as sick -- what good will that do me or anyone else? I heal society by healing myself. Just as life is lived one day at a time, the world will heal one person at a time. Each time I think a positive, loving thought, it goes into the ether and vibrates. This is nothing particularly mystical; I have but to sit near someone and look at her face to feel how her thoughts affect me. I take ownership of my own inner workings and their effect on myself and others. Today I am the gift.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
People think that 'nobility' is something special. But when you study the word, you come to realize that 'nobles' were simply those who served the King. Nobles were servants. In the Twelve-Step programs, we are all nobility.
The highest office I can attain in our fellowship, is Chief Servant.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Don't worry about finding your feelings; they will find you.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am grateful for the power I have over the future of my life.
I am being guided at all times to use my power with wisdom and with love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
We all came on different ships but we're on the same boat now. - Martin Luther King.
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. I will be back looking for Lin and others.