Even More Recovery Readings

[majestyjo]

February 8

Step by Step

Today, living only for today without reaching into yesterday and bringing its baggage into today and leaving tomorrow to its own time. Sobriety is a reprieve from drinking – but only for today. I have no guarantee that my current 24 Hours of sobriety will carry into tomorrow, if there is one, and I cannot take for granted that what is mine today won’t be thrown away – by me – tomorrow. And while I have no guarantee that my sobriety today will be mine tomorrow, I CAN improve the chances by doing today what the program requires of me – to tend to the business of today and not yesterday or tomorrow, to seek through contact with my Higher Power absolute and unconditional surrender, faith, gratitude and humility, and NOT to do to anyone what I would not want done to me. By strengthening the foundation of my sobriety today, the storms of tomorrow, if any, will be weakened by my sobriety then. But today’s business must be tended to first, and today is my business. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

~ Will Rogers ~

Doesn’t life sometimes seem like a jigsaw puzzle with all the pieces scattered on the floor? Our Program provides us with simple instructions for matching the pieces. We are told if we follow these few instructions, in time we will begin to see the picture develop. But there can be no shortcuts. We can start anywhere, but the picture will only emerge one piece at a time.

Each day for us is like a piece of the jigsaw puzzle. It gives us a glimpse of the picture of our lives. We learn that we must live the while day through to get to the next day. There is no way to get to tomorrow but through today. One day at a time becomes the key to the future.

I will only be able to keep my addictions in check today. I can do anything for one day. This is the only day I have, so let me do the best I can.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

An ounce of apology is worth a pound of loneliness.

~ Joseph Joubert ~

The healing that comes when we make amends happens in two places. First of all, it mends the split between what we want to be and the mistake we have made. In that way, we take responsibility for our actions and reaffirm our standards for ourselves. It’s a way of respecting ourselves by saying, I believe in the standard that I didn’t keep and I will try harder next time.

The second place that healing may happen is between ourself and the person we have harmed. If it’s an old mistake, with apology long overdue, the relationship may take on renewed meaning after an apology. It opens the possibility for a discussion about the friendship and its importance to each person. In other situations, an apology doesn’t heal the connection and perhaps the other person isn’t willing to accept it. In such a situation, we still take comfort in knowing that we have restored the split within ourselves and we can let go of the past.

Today I will be sincere and quick with my apologies.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other.

~ George Eliot ~

Always seeing our struggles as the fault of others is a good indication that we need an attitude adjustment. There is no better place to get one than in this program of recovery. The women around us and the Steps that guide us can help us discover the joy of cultivating a new attitude.

Trying to determine the grand purpose of our lives can be overwhelming and anxiety-provoking. As alcoholics, we gravitate toward complicating the simple. That’s why one of our slogans is “Keep it simple.” We can apply this to all our relationships. Asking ourselves what we can do to help someone else, at every opportunity, defines our purpose in life quite clearly. Moment by moment, we’ll never doubt what to do next.

My purpose is to help someone else today. If I think someone is causing me a problem, perhaps I should address my attitude.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am building a new source of strength

When I had symptoms of my psychiatric illness, I used street drugs to manage them. Drugs were my higher power. They seemed to do what I thought I couldn’t do. When I used them, I seemed to feel better—briefly. But instead of restoring my mental and emotional health, the drugs led to addiction, and the addiction has made my psychiatric recovery that much harder. Now I must work on two illnesses together.

These days, it’s clear that I won’t find relief in street drugs. Real relief comes from people, caring people who accept and understand my no-fault illnesses. With the help of my friends and fellows in dual recovery, I can remain both stable and abstinent.

I will make a commitment to myself to spend more time with people who have the experience, strength, and hope that can help me recover.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Openly accept who you are and the restoration has begun.

~ David M. ~

Our egos may struggle with the very idea of being restored. We hate to admit we lost our sanity in the first place. But when we look at the rubble around us, the picture is pretty clear: the way we were living was definitely insane. Though we weren’t crazy, our lives lacked order, direction, serenity, and spirituality. We kept trying the same things over and over, expecting different results. This is a good definition of insanity.

Our egos and our disease blocked acceptance of our problems, but both lost power and control over our lives when we began to accept who we are.

Just as an antique table is restored to its original beauty, we can be restored to sanity. It will take time and effort. There’ll be some scraping and rubbing. But, we’re worth it. We are valuable creations of our Higher Power, who is willing to work with us and restore us. Our job is to do the next right thing, one step at a time. What a better life, a more beautiful world, one with order, direction, and a relationship with our Higher Power to help us manage it.

Today restore me to sanity. Bring me serenity and a sane way to live.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Appearances aside, we need no advice but approval.

~ Coco Chanel ~

Decisions based on people-pleasing take the focus from your wants and needs and place it on the wants and needs of others. You may feel that you are protecting yourself from criticism and disapproval by acting and verbalizing in ways you feel will earn acceptance and approval. But the time you spend focused on pleasing others is less time spent on yourself, and you may become out of touch with who you are and what you want and need.

Your recovery depends upon your ability to understand and act upon what is right for you. This does not mean that you have to be selfish, self-centered, or uncaring about others, nor does it mean that every decision you make has to be based solely upon what you want. It simply means that you need to take care of yourself first so your commitment to your recovery remains strong.

If you are unsure of your wants and needs, simply change the word should to want whenever you need to make a choice. So instead of thinking, I should go to a meeting tonight, you can think, I want to go to a meeting tonight.

Today I will keep my focus on what I want and need to become n stronger person. I will make choices that support my recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

All miseries derive from not being able to sit quietly in a room alone.

~ Blaise Pascal ~

When we are alone, what’s the first thing we do? Do we turn on the radio, call a friend, invite someone over, make plans to go out, or turn on the television? How easy is it for us to be in silence for a period of time?

Perhaps we grew up in homes filled with confusion and yelling and everyone talking at once. Silence may be uncomfortable for us. Perhaps we prefer to fill our rooms with noise so we don’t feel alone. Whatever method we choose to drown out the sounds of silence, we are also drowning out another sound—the inner self.

How can we possibly think, read, meditate, or write in a journal with noise bombarding us? To learn to sit comfortably alone in silence, we need to try it in small steps. We can start with five minutes, then ten, then fifteen, then a half-hour. By gently easing ourselves into quiet moments, we will allow our inner selves the time and space in which to grow.

I can spend a short time alone in silence, and listen to my inner self.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Expressing love

As we recover, we come to realize the presence of a Higher Power in our lives. Eventually we realize how much progress in recovery comes through our Higher Power. We realize that we are loved.

Being loved, we can love others, but we cannot love mankind until we love our God. And we cannot love our God until we love each other. (And we cannot love each other until we love ourselves.)

When we practice loving our fellows (in thought, word, and deed), we feel the presence of our Higher Power and feel that we, too, are loved.

Do I express my love for others?

Higher Power, help me recognize your presence and power in my life. Help me love others as I am loved.

I will show my love for others today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

But let me think away those times of woe;
Now ’tis a fairer season….

~ JOHN KEATS ~

Newcomer

I feel trapped and miserable. I don’t want to pick up my addiction, but, frankly, my life feels bleak without it. I’m not like those goody-goodies who do everything right and spout program. I’ll never be like them. What’s the point of being in recovery, if I feel this bad?

Sponsor

In recovery, I make the decision not to change my mood with an addictive substance or behavior today. And I can make other decisions as well. Recovery is the freedom to make choices. I can choose to remain isolated with feelings of fear, anger, and loneliness, or I can choose to share my feelings with another recovering person. I can arrange to go to a meeting. I can make phone calls—even short ones—to people whose numbers I have asked for. If I only reach answering machines (some days are like that!) I can choose to leave messages asking people to call back. I can let go of results, knowing that I’ve done my part. If I’m feeling stressed, I can light a candle or just sit quietly for a few moments to relax and breathe. I may read a page from some program literature.

We can choose to put yesterday and tomorrow “on the shelf” and just let ourselves be, for this moment.

Today, I make choices that support my recovery. I have the willingness to be happy.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The difference between your pre-AA existence and your present is in direct ratio to the extent “God’s way of living” has influenced your life.

Those of us who have witnessed the miracles in our own midst and who have felt the surge of power that we acquired when we tapped this unlimited reservoir, know that our “horsepower” is dependent on our God-power.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Be grateful you have been given two ears and only one mouth.

2) There is no mistake so great as that of being always right.

3) Discover yourself. Everything else has been done.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Life Is a Celebration

Lord, help me today to:
Mend a quarrel.
Seek out a forgotten friend.
Dismiss suspicion and replace it with trust.
Write a friendly letter.
Share a treasure.
Give a soft answer.
Encourage another.
Manifest my loyalty in word and deed.
Keep a promise.
Find the time.
Forego a grudge.
Forgive an enemy.
Listen.
Acknowledge any wrongdoing. 
Try to understand.
Examine my demands on others.
Think of someone else first.
Be kind.
Be gentle.
Laugh a little.
Smile more.
Be happy.
Show my gratitude.
Welcome a stranger.
Speak Your love.
Speak it again.
Live it again.
LIFE IS A CELEBRATION!

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THY WILL BE DONE

Thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:10)

Now we too often choose to use our free will in a negative way; allowing ourselves to think selfishly, and this wrong thinking brings upon us all our troubles. Instead of understanding that it is our essential nature to express God, to be ever about our Father’s business, we try to set up our own account. We abuse our own free will, trying to work apart from God; and the very natural results is all sickness, poverty, sin, troubles, and death that we find on the physical plane. We must never for a moment try to make plans or arrangements without reference to God, or suppose that we can either be happy or successful if we are seeking any other end than to do his will.

Our business is to bring our whole nature as fast as we can into conformity with the will of God. “In his will is our peace,” said Dante, and the Divine Comedy is really a study in fundamental states of consciousness, the Inferno representing the state of the soul that is endeavoring to live without God, the Paradisio representing the state of the soul that has achieved its conscious unity with the divine will. It was the sublime conflict of the soul that wrung from the heart of the great Augustine the cry, “Thou hast made us for Thyself; and our hearts are restless until they find themselves in Thee.”

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

I’ll Be Your Rock

A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

The acclaimed motion picture Field of Dreams touched the hearts of millions and was nominated for an Academy Award as best picture of the year. Actor Kevin Costner accepted the lead role in spite of a deluge of criticism from his advisors, who warned him that he could damage his image and career by making a “Care Bear” film. The sponsoring studio also levied immense pressure against Costner and producer Phil Robinson in an effort to add sex and violence to make the movie more marketable. When Robinson was tempted to buckle, Costner urged him, “Don’t give in, Phil—I’ll be your rock.” Encouraged by Costner’s support, Robinson held his ground, and the film went on to be a huge success without exploitative elements.

Is anyone your “rock”? Have you acknowledged this person? Are you a rock for another? What can you do to support someone who is being challenged to hold to their vision?

The support of a friend during a time of adversity can make the difference between success and failure, despair and triumph. Encouragement and confidence are priceless spiritual gifts that can change an entire life.

Give me the strength to be a rock to my friends. Help me sustain the spirit of my loved ones and to be open to receive their support.

Founded in Spirit, I can do all things in the name of love.

[majestyjo]

February 9

Step by Step

Today, set aside a couple of minutes to think about drinking. And in mustering the courage to be absolutely honest, Memory Lane will be strewn with broken whiskey bottles, broken hearts, broken dreams, broken promises, broken potential, lost time, lost jobs, lost friends, lost relatives, grief, sorrow, tears, loneliness, emptiness, prayers to a porcelain god, dry heaves, the color of vomit on a bed pillow the morning after, remorse, guilt, and swearing no more – until I jump into the insanity of the vicious cycle again. There are no fond memories of alcohol, no memories of any good times before they weren’t good anymore, no romanticizing of the reality of my drinking. Today, I’ll think about drinking – and I’ll refuse to lose anymore. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EMOTIONS

We know too much and feel too little. At least we feel too little of those creative emotions from which a good life springs.

~ Bertrand Russell ~

A fear of dealing with deep emotional experiences must not become a retreat from reality. We can’t stick our heads and our hearts in the sand and avoid experiencing our emotions, and still hope to grow in the Program. Only robots are emotionless, unable to grow and change.

We need energy to make the spiritual growth to which we aspire. All emotions are sources of energy. None are static. Power emerges from every emotion, be it positive and constructive, or negative and harmful. The power unleashed by our emotions will fuel our spiritual growth if we use it correctly.

We need to steer the energy of dangerous emotions such as fear and anger into beneficial channels. We need to keep emotions like love and humility from becoming excessive.

I am fortunate to have found a way to deal with positive and negative emotions through my recovery program.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

I never think of the future, it comes soon enough.

~ Albert Einstein ~

In our spiritual development, we learn to think about time in new ways. Many of us have come to our healing journey stuck in the past, imprisoned by fears or angers that arose years ago. We live in the past through regrets and grief’s about things that can never change, and we translate them into the future with fears and foreboding. Yet we all know that life is only in the present. All we need to do is live today.

Our memories shaped us but our development is not finished. Today, we don’t have to deal with all the problems we can foresee in the future. Today we are given a hand to play, and we can play the cards we have as we choose. With the spiritual guidance of our recovery path, we can resolve the pain of the past and our fears of the future. Our Higher Power reassures us that we will never be alone.

Today, once again, I awake into the present and I thank God for the chance to live this day. I will let my Higher Power care for my fears and regrets.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Prayer is not a science.

~ Mary McDermott Shideler ~

Since becoming clean and sober, many of us are coming to understand the purpose and value of prayer in our lives. Our friends tell us that any words spoken in sincerity to our Higher Power serve as prayers. That’s good fortune for women like us.

This means we have the freedom to pray in any way that satisfies us. Now we can talk with God whenever and however it suits us. We will be heard, always. We will be answered when the time Is right. What an empowering opportunity! Coming to believe this gives us a respite from our Incessant fretting over everyday concerns.

Prayer can be anything—a thought, a request, a conversation, a plea, a dream. Our honesty is all that’s needed. Prayer is not mysterious unless we make it so.

Every thought I take to God is a prayer. Today I’ll be free of anxiety if I think of God before every action I take.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to face my liabilities

I’ve been afraid to do Steps Four and Five. Although it makes sense to become more honest about myself, I’m afraid of the guilt and the shame—some of which I’m feeling already. I am afraid that somehow I’ll be rejected or punished. Yet what I need more than anything is understanding and acceptance.

As I have struggled (and watched others struggle) with these two Steps, I’ve learned that their acceptance and forgiveness are so important to my recovery. But I’ve also learned that one must be ready to do them. (There is no hurry. There are no tests. And it’s OK to take my time.) Before proceeding with Steps Four and Five, I need faith in my higher power, trust in the program, and the courage to face my liabilities.

When I feel ready, first I will carefully pace my inventory. Then I’ll select a Fifth Step listener who truly understands dual recovery.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

There is no greatness where there is not simplicity, goodness, and truth.

~ Leo Tolstoy ~

Intimacy is friendship at its deepest level, the profound comfort that comes from complete trust between two human beings. It means being loved unconditionally, as is, for our spiritual selves rather than as a package with decorative trimmings and marks of status. And it means loving back the same way.

We learn about intimacy from our families of origin. Many of us, however, didn’t have very good role models, so intimacy eludes us.

But all is not lost. Working the Twelve Steps in a Twelve Step fellowship makes us honest. Then when someone loves us, they love us. We are being who we really are (as best we know) and in so being we offer ourselves to another. It doesn’t mean we won’t get hurt if the feelings aren’t mutual, but at least we’re spared the effort of trying to be what we’re not or living in fear that we’ll be found out. On the other hand, if the feelings are mutual, what great joy to finally be with a friend and be who we really are.

Today help me find the courage to be as honest as I can be in all that I do.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Making mental connections is our most crucial learning tool… to see patterns, relationships, context.

~ Marilyn Ferguson ~

One day, on the famous “bullet train” from Kyoto to Tokyo, passengers rushed to one side of the train just in time to see thick clouds suddenly part, revealing the beauty of Mount Fuji. They exclaimed with excitement and took pictures until, just as suddenly, the clouds once again hid the mountain.

The incident affected the rest of the journey. People who had been strangers started talking to one another, more aware of all around them. Those who had been sleeping awakened and watched the scenery pass by as the train sped to its destination.

Those passengers shared a common connection that brought them unity. The same is true in your recovery. You are an essential part of every meeting you attend. The story you bring to others is a story with which they are familiar. The thoughts and feelings you have resonate with them. Every time you share your thoughts and feelings, you become empowered. It is through this connection that you can come to realize that you are an important part of the world.

Today I will be aware of the simple truth that I belong. I trust that I am part of everything and everyone around me.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Life is like a library owned by an author. In it are a few books which he wrote himself, but most of them were written for him.

~ Harry Emerson Fosdick ~

In our minds there are multitudes of stored memories, knowledge, and skills. Some of these are the results of living and learning, but most are information given to us by others. Our family, friends, co-workers, teachers, and children are the greatest sources for our storehouses of information.

Most of our learning comes from others. Teachers give us much in the way of facts. Our family instructs us in morals. Friends show us different personalities and lifestyles. Our children reflect what we’ve taught them and give us their views of the world.

All the information we have is valuable to our growth and maturity. Every person we meet, each place we visit, and everything we try contribute to our library of knowledge and experience. At times we may borrow from what is on our shelves, but we must keep our shelves stocked with fresh material. Each night we can write a new volume based on the day’s experiences.

I have more valuable contributions to make to my library of knowledge and experience.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Remembering our powerlessness

If we’ve been around so long that we think our bad times are over and we can’t get “crazy” again, then we probably have already gotten “crazy” in the head. None of us is immune to relapse nor so spiritual that we have no room for improvement. If we think we no longer need help, we may be in trouble already.

If we have forgotten our powerlessness, we may have to learn it all over again. As addicts, we will always be at risk to relapse, but with proper guidance we can be productive and fulfilled.

Do I realize how powerless and at risk I truly am?

Higher Power, I take pride and joy in being clean and sober, but help me remember how powerless I still am and keep me humble.

I will remind myself of my powerlessness today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Example is always more efficacious than precept.

~ SAMUEL JOHNSON ~

Newcomer

It’s devastating to me to watch old friends and family members whose lives are still being screwed up by this disease. How can I convince them to join me in recovery before it’s too late? I’m sad and frustrated. Life’s so unfair! Why am I in recovery, while they’re still suffering?

Sponsor

Recovery is a gift that somehow, against all the odds, has been given to you. You can refuse it, trash it, or think yourself out of it. Loss of recovery not only would be your loss, but would also be a loss to all who could be helped by your example. You have a responsibility to maintain it each day, to nurture it by going to meetings, by using the tools that have been given to you, and above all by not picking up addictive substances and behaviors.

Friends and family members who need recovery but who don’t want it yet may be able to see the changes in us over time. Even though we’d like more than anything to persuade them to do themselves a favor and join us in recovery right now, we need to accept that this approach doesn’t work. Could anyone have persuaded you?

I am entitled to the gift of my recovery. I cherish this gift, not by preaching or trying to rescue others, but by making recovery central in my own life.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Many practicing alcoholics know their desperate need for AA, but are reluctant to do anything about it as they feel their friends would ridicule them, and so they continue drinking and making themselves ridiculous.

Too many of us put too much emphasis on the reactions of people whose reactions are not worth considering.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Sometimes the worst things in life happen after you get what you think you want.

2) FOG: Fear, Obligation, Guilt

3) Don’t just do something. Stand there!

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Language of the Heart

Dear God, You know my needs before I ask, my heart before I pray, and my gratitude before I even offer my thanks. You understand me better than I understand myself, and I thank You for communicating with me in the language of the heart.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

OUR DAILY BREAD

Give us this day our daily bread (Matthew 6:11)

Because we are the children of a loving Father, we are entitled to expect that God will provide us fully with everything we need. If we do so expect, in faith and understanding, we shall never look in vain.

It is the Will of God that we should all lead healthy, happy lives, full of joyous experience; that we should develop freely and steadily. To this end we require such things as food, clothing, shelter, means of travel, books, and so on; above all, we require freedom. In the Prayer all these things are included under the heading of bread. Bread, that is to say, means not merely food in general, but all things that man requires for a healthy, happy, free, and harmonious life. But in order to obtain these things, we have to claim them, not necessarily in detail, but we have to claim them, and, we have to recognize God and God alone as the Source and fountainhead of all our good. Lack of any kind is always traceable to the fact that we have been seeking our supply from some secondary source, instead of from God Himself, the Author and Giver of life.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

As Thyself

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.

~ Lucille Ball ~

“My ex-wife wants me to do one thing, my son wants me to do something else, and my girlfriend has another agenda,” Tom complained to me during a seminar.

“What would you like to do?” I asked.

Tom looked stunned. “Me? I don’t know.”

“Think about it,” I suggested.

The next day, Tom came on-stage and reported, “Yesterday was a turning point in my life. Alan asked me what I wanted to do, and that was the perfect question. I realized that I’ve spent most of my life trying to please other people. For a moment, I set aside what everyone else was asking me to do and considered what would make me happy. I came up with something that not only empowered me but would work for everyone else. I feel like I have my life back!”

Jesus’s most often-quoted commandment is: “Love thy neighbor as thy–self.” Usually we equate this advice with taking good care of our neighbors, but we often overlook the “as thyself” portion. If you are loving your neighbor more than yourself, or at the expense of yourself, you have not fulfilled the commandment. Jesus was suggesting that we love all equally, including ourselves. If your vision of service does not include your own happiness, you’ve left out a very important person.

The universe works on a win-win basis. There is always a way for everyone to be taken care of. Do not stop until you have blessed everyone, including yourself.

Help me find the compassion to honor my own heart, along with others.

I give myself the kindness and forgiveness I would shove others.

[majestyjo]

February 10

Step by Step

Today, review Step 10, the follow-up and maintenance of the Fourth Step of “moral inventory” infamy, with two purposes in mind: to detect any pending resurgence of any character defects that might derail my recovery, and to measure if I am proceeding with the program’s integrity. In working for and progressing toward sobriety and maximum benefits, I must also be reminded that the program expects and deserves something from me in return: openness, honesty, humility, gratitude, and ethical 12th-stepping. Today, my 10th Step is designed to determine if I am working with gratitude and respect of the program’s entire steps and traditions and, in return, that I am respecting the program through honesty, integrity and loyalty. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ROSE GARDENS

Give me roses to remember in the shadow of December.

~ Margaret L. Woods ~

When we began recovery, nobody promised us a rose garden. Yet each day in recovery we find that we do have a rose garden full of cherished beauty.

No flower garden will ever produce lovely blooms for us unless we work constantly at weeding, hoeing, mulching, fertilizing, pruning dead wood, watering and spraying for plant enemies. How much spiritual growth our garden brings us depends on the amount of spade work we do.

The gifts of the Program are realized when we put our best efforts to work. This way of life is based on our positive action.

I must make my life like rich soil so that what is planted within me will be nourished and grow.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Real friends are those who, when you’ve made a fool of yourself, don’t feel that you’ve done a permanent job.

~ Erwin T. Randall ~

Friendship is one of the most important elements in a rich and joyful life. Good mental health requires that we not walk through life without one or two good friends. Many of us have been very lonely. We built invisible shields around ourselves that protected us from letting others know what we were thinking or doing, but they also separated us from the comfortable closeness of good friends. Many of us have a deep and abiding anxiety about being vulnerable to anyone, and many of us are especially guarded about getting close to other men.

In our growth as men, we are abandoning notions of perfection in ourselves and in others. We don’t expect perfection, and we can expect our friends to cut us some slack when they see our mistakes and our weaknesses. True friends see in each other a complex weaving of many qualities, many experiences, and a mixture of more and less attractive qualities.

Today I will give my friendships the primary place they deserve.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Loving means moving my ego aside and letting my Higher Power send energy through me to others.

~ Jane Nakken ~

We commonly hear in Twelve Step meetings that ego is the culprit in our experiences, but what does that mean? Isn’t having a healthy self-image the same as having a strong ego? Not exactly; a strong ego is not necessarily a healthy one. But how can we tell the difference?

Perhaps the best way is to look at our behavior. If we are trying to control others against their will, the unhealthy dimension of our ego has taken over. Backing off, letting that person be directed by a Higher Power rather than by us, enhances the good feelings we have of ourselves. That’s how a healthy self-image is developed.

I will love the people in my life today. They are here with me now because that is God’s assignment for me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can get by with less money

Recovering from two chronic illnesses costs money. And these days I have little—all I can manage is a part-time job. Sometimes it’s hard to pay the bills. I miss what extra money I used to have. I can’t have fun the way I used to.

On the other hand, does that mean I can’t have any fun at all? In the Sunday paper I noticed a list of free events for “folks on a budget” (that’s me—and apparently I’m not alone!). True, money is important, but maybe I don’t have to let it be so important. Maybe this is a chance for me to change how I think about money.

I will make a note of two free things I like to do, or two free places I like to go, and tack the note on my bulletin board.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The more balanced our lives, the more serene we feel.

~ Ann Smith ~

Recovery is a balancing act. As we begin to grow and change, we find that balance is a key opening the door to serenity. In our old using days, we lived on the edge and had become disaster experts. Major areas of our lives seemed to be in constant flux. We had disturbed relationships, little or no spirituality, poor emotional and physical health, and trouble with money.

Today our world is changing. We are coming to value and cherish our serenity and honesty. When one of our major life areas is out of balance, we find that we pay attention. We’re beginning to see patterns and, through these patterns, a new hope for real, lasting change. By the grace of God, we seem to be losing our high tolerance for confusion and uncertainty. Every new day, our newfound knowledge about ourselves and our spiritual guidance are working together to change our lives.

Today help me find the middle ground and take the time I need to find my balance.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

If you’re feeling miserable, force yourself to smile broadly, holding your goofy grin at least ten seconds. When you relax your face, you’ll actually feel happier.

~ Sandra Stier ~

It has been said that humor may be hazardous to your illness. Research shows that those who are seriously ill can use humor and laughter to help turn the tide of their illness. Yet when you are in pain, depressed, or stressed, the last thing you may want to do is smile.

A smile can open up a positive flow of energy, while laughter can provide a positive balance to negative feelings. They can be as beneficial to your body as aerobic exercise and as helpful to your mind as a peaceful meditation.

When you laugh at your problems and see humor in challenging situations, you open yourself to greater capabilities for handling whatever comes your way. A smile or a laugh can take you away from your problems and troubles—if only for a few moments—and provide you with the ability to see things with different eyes and a fresh perspective. You may discover that something you were obsessing about is really quite inconsequential, and something that caused you great upset is really not as terrible as you thought.

Today I will remember that it is okay to laugh through my tears and smile through my sadness.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When folks have allotted themselves a task and work together in unison, they escape unhappiness.

~ Emile Zola ~

We may have been loners in the past, preferring solitude to the company of others. We may have spent time as children buried in books instead of outside playing with other children. We may have endured high school without lots of dates. We may now feel more comfortable with people in one-on-one situations rather than in large groups.

A meeting is an ideal place to learn how to interact with others. We don’t have to act a certain way or hide our feelings, because our group will understand us no matter what. We can give as much as we choose and they will neither harm us, nor ask for more.

By attending meetings regularly, we’ll learn they exist because people are working together in unison. Someone “opens up,” others make coffee, one will chair and one will speak, and some will clean up at the end. We can learn that the strength of our group lies in the ability of each member to do what is comfortable for him or her. Such coexistence can help us learn we can gather strength from numbers.

I can do something to add to the strength of the group.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Praying for things

It seems that in our selfishness we’re always praying for the things that we want and not the things we need. If we pray for and receive luxury sexual fulfillment, or an easy life, what do we gain? Certainly not strength, wisdom, and love.

To gain strength we must carry burdens; to gain wisdom we must become honest with ourselves; and to gain love we must become loving. These virtues are not accomplished through material things, sex, or a soft life.

Am I praying for the right things?

Higher Power, help me pray for the right things and to accept that you will give me what I need and not necessarily what I want.

Today I will pray for

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

As we advance in life, we learn the limits of our abilities.

~ JAMES FROUDE ~

Newcomer

If I hear “This is a ‘we’ program” one more time, I’ll get sick. I don’t like groups, I don’t like the idea of depending on this program, and I don’t like the idea of depending on a Higher Power to take care of me. I’ve always been a strong person. I cherish my independence.

Sponsor

Let’s take a look at some different kinds of dependency. Of course, there are dependencies that aren’t appropriate; they keep us from growing, just as our addictions did. For example, a parent’s continuing financial support of a grown child who is capable of earning a living on his or her own enables a mutual dependency that’s probably unhealthy for both parties.

There are other kinds of dependency that most of us accept without hesitation. When we strike a match, we expect a flame; when we put seeds into the earth, we trust that plants will grow. Dependency isn’t enslavement. If we’re diabetic and depend on daily insulin to regulate our blood sugar level, we don’t regard ourselves as weak. We’re grateful that the means exist to keep our disease in check. The same is true of Twelve Step programs for those of us who acknowledge our addictions. We can count on these meetings being here when we need them. We can count on the fact that if we follow the program, we will not have to depend on addictive substances and behaviors.

Today, my willingness to depend on this program gives me freedom.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We should choose to want less of material things and more of substantial values.

Happiness comes not from possessions but from an ability to possess the things that assure happiness. Live up to the Twelve Steps as best you can and you will find your sense of values will change and that real, lasting happiness is within your reach.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Denial, is not just a river in Egypt.

2) Grateful addicts don’t drink and drug and drinking and drugging addicts aren’t grateful.

3) We must learn from the mistakes of others because we won’t live long enough to make them all ourselves.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Am I Willing?

Dear Higher Power, help me:

To forget what I have done for other people, and to remember what other people have done for me.

To ignore what the world owes me, and to think what I owe the world.

To put my rights in the background, and my duties in the middle distance, and my chances to do a little more than my duty in the foreground.

To see that my fellow members are just as real as I am, and to try to look behind their faces to their hearts, as hungry for joy as mine is.

To own that probably the only good reason for my existence is not what I can get out of life, but what I can give to life.

To close my book of complaints against the management of the universe and look for a place where I can sow a few seeds of happiness—am I willing to do these things even for a day?

Then I have a good chance of staying with the Program.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE GIVER OF OUR BREAD

People think of their supply as coming from certain investments, or from a business, or from an employer, perhaps; whereas these are merely the channels through which it comes, God being the Source. A particular channel is likely to change, because change is the cosmic law for manifestation. Stagnation is really death; but as long as you realize that the Source of your supply is the one unchangeable Spirit, all is well. The fading out of one channel will be but the signal for the opening of another.

In its inner and most important meaning, our daily bread signifies the realization of the Presence of God—an actual sense that God exist not merely in a nominal way, but as the great reality; we can rely upon Him to supply all that we need to have; teach us all the we need to know; and guide our steps so that we shall not make mistakes. This is Emanuel, or God with us.

But my God shall supply all you need . . . (Phillipians 4:19).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Pass the Salt

Respect the past in the full measure of its desserts, but do not make the mistake of confusing it with the present, or seek in it the ideals of the future.

~ Jose Ingenieros ~

As I unpacked my suitcase at a hotel, I discovered that I had left two of my favorite articles of clothing hanging in a closet at another hotel 2,000 miles away. As I picked up the phone to call the hotel to see if the items had turned up in Lost and Found, I noticed that I was hesitating. I realized I didn’t want to call because I didn’t really want to retrieve the items. One was a sweatshirt given to me years ago, and another was a casual shirt I have customarily worn on plane flights. Both felt very old, laden with memories and history I no longer wanted to carry with me. I put down the phone and smiled. I was done with the shirts. They did not belong to me now, and I would not call them back to me.

Every time we haul an old, painful memory into the now, we are phoning a distant hotel and asking for our tattered garments to be forwarded to our new abode. Messengers will do so if we ask. Then we wonder why our present looks like our past. But we are under no obligation to replay old scenes; all of life is optional, including reliving ancient pain. Every day we are free to choose anew. If today looks gruesomely like yesterday, and your life is a long replay of Groundhog Day, do not blame karma, the environment, or other people. Instead, look at the choices you are making today.

The Bible tells how, as Sodom was being destroyed, God told Lot and his family not to look back. Lot’s wife disobeyed, and she was turned into a pillar of salt. The story is a metaphor. When we clutch at the old after it no longer serves us, we become petrified. Salt is a preservative. We cannot preserve the past; we must release it to make way for a fresh new future.

I return my past to You, and allow You to make me new.

I release the past and invite love to meet me in the present.

[majestyjo]

February 11

Step by Step

Today, empower no one and nothing to doubt the self-confidence and self-respect I have developed in my recovery, nor will my progress be discouraged. People I might have injured in my drinking days but who cannot or will not accept my amends may want nothing more than to see me fail. They will not have that control over me, even if insecurity might want me to yield just to avoid a problem. But a bigger problem looms if I permit anyone or any situation to implant in me deeper insecurity or a disgraced self-confidence and self-respect. Today, with the AA’s principles as my lifeline, I will hold tightly onto what I have gained and will not allow anyone or anything to take it from me – not even alcohol. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERVICE

Whomsoever shall compel you to go with him one mile… go with him…. Go another mile.

~ Og Mandino ~

No effort must ever seem so great that it will stop us from giving completely of ourselves in helping someone find the kind of life others helped us find. It is the responsibility of each member to go to any lengths in giving service. Whatever sacrifice it may require from us will bring great rewards.

We always learn that, in the act of one person helping another, no person can give without receiving, or get without giving. We learn from our sponsors that when they help us, they are also helping themselves. This experience is a very important part of the Program. Our 1st, 2nd, and 5th Traditions are grounded in the principle of service to others. We are privileged to share in that experience.

When I undertake to help another person or our Fellowship, I must strive to do more and serve better than is expected of me.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Time spent lauding is time spent with the gods.

~ Japanese proverb ~

Many of our stories have both a dark and a light side. As we make peace with ourselves, we can take ourselves less seriously. We hang out with others who have had similar experiences and we begin to relax. That is when the healing effect of laughter can move in. The worst of times has its funny side, and learning to laugh at it lightens the burden.

The inside jokes of a group that has lived through hard times are wonderful things to share. Suddenly we don’t feel so alone. If my brother can laugh at the stupid things he did, I can laugh at myself too. That sense of recognition—we know what it was like, we are insiders—is another form of bonding that heals us.

Today I will not take myself so seriously that I cannot laugh at myself.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Learning to listen to one’s own inner voice is the last crucial step to wholeness.

~ Paula Sunray ~

How does our inner voice develop? Those of us who grew up in violent families most often heard abusive voices. Or perhaps we grew up in near- empty homes where the absence of attention Injured our well-being. Almost certainly, the voices most of us heard didn’t affirm us. But the voices we can now cultivate, with the help of this program, will change us and make us whole and healthy.

Developing the inner voice we want and deserve may seem difficult at first. Luckily, sponsors get us on the right track, modeling habits that will help us change our lives, just as soon as we express our willingness. Becoming whole is our decision, and developing a healthy inner voice is our responsibility. Utilizing the program tools assures it.

I can listen to a loving inner voice if I practice loving myself and others today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I help myself when I help others

Some nights when the phone rings, I hope it isn’t a friend calling for support. Even though I have some time in dual recovery, I’ve still got my own worries. I’ve still got my own pain. Some nights I just don’t have the energy for helping.

And yet, somewhere, through my higher power, I find the energy. When I hear a voice in pain, when I am asked for help, I know that I can listen. I don’t have to take on the pain or fix the problem, but I can be a good listener. And when the conversation is over, I can feel lighter about my own worries and yet stronger for having helped.

I will answer any call for support with all the strength of my program.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Be still…

~ Anonymous ~

“Be still,” says a mother to her children or a teacher to his or her students. At one time or another all of us have been told to be still, sometimes for good reason.

There is also good reason to tell ourselves to be still. Life is often hectic and stressful. Work, school, family, and social life can pull us in many directions. When we can hardly think because of so many things going on at once, the message “be still” is most helpful.

By stopping what we are doing and being still, we give our body, mind, and spirit a chance to recuperate. We can let the world race on without us. It will still be there when we are done, but by learning the art of being still, we re-enter the world more relaxed. And relaxed, we no longer are reacting to forces out of our control — we are accepting those things and choosing to put our energy into what we can control. Stillness gives us serenity and choices. It is how we work together with our Higher Power.

Today help me practice being still.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

It seems to me that there are two great enemies of peace— fear and selfishness.

~ Katherine Paterson ~

Imagine you are going on a vacation. A friend has offered to help you pack your bags, take you out to lunch, and then drive you to the airport.

You lay out the clothes and toiletries you will take, and your friend starts to pack them but not in your usual way. So you tell your friend how the items should be packed. Later your friend takes you to a restaurant. But it isn’t one you like, so you tell your friend to take you to the place where you want to eat. As your friend drives you to the airport, you notice it is not the route you would have taken, so you tell your friend the route to take. When you arrive at the airport, is it any wonder that your friend is more than happy to toss your bags out of the car and leave you on the curb?

When things do not go the way you want or planned, let go. Reach out to your Higher Power for the serenity you need.

When I humbly reach out to my Higher Power, I give up my need to control. Today I trust that my Higher Power will always hear and answer my prayers.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain.

~ Emily Dickinson ~

Many times we may say, “I need a meeting,” or “I need to call someone.” There are times when other people say the same things because they, too, are in need. The purpose of the program is to help ourselves, but we need to remember others are there to help themselves too. Do we know someone who needs help?

There are so many great rewards in helping another through a time of need. Probably the greatest reward is that we lose our self-centeredness. Helping another through pain or sorrow also lets us help ourselves through our pain and sorrow. We say some helpful things to another that we, too, benefit from hearing.

A third reward is seeing another person’s vulnerability. We may find it easier to take risks and expose our humanness by seeing another do the same. Finally, helping another is a way of showing love in a nonphysical way. Many of us may need to learn love isn’t only a relationship or sex. Love is gently showing concern and compassion with no thoughts of reciprocation.

I can help another and know there are great rewards in reaching out.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Avoiding procrastination

In the midst of our addiction, everything could be put off, including people: We had to have our stuff.

Now that we have the business of life to tend to—now that we have a life—are we doing what we need to today? Or are we putting things off until tomorrow? If we don’t take care of business today, we could relapse and lose what we have gained from the Twelve Steps and the fellowship.

Have I stopped procrastinating?

Higher Power, help me do what I need to do today; help me persevere to prevent losing what I have gained.

Today I will do three things that I have been putting off, they are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Rest in natural great peace.

~ NYOSHULKHENPO ~

Newcomer

I keep hearing people say that giving up the addiction itself is only the beginning of the process. Today I’m feeling upset and downhearted. I don’t know if I can face the literature on the Steps yet.

Sponsor

As we prepare to continue on the path of the Steps, we can do an exercise that helps quiet our mental agitation and gently begins to restore our sense of connection with positive forces in our lives. We start by finding a comfortable position, either sitting or lying down, with our spines straight but relaxed. We can close our eyes, if that helps us concentrate. We take several deeper, slower breaths. Then we take a few minutes to think of positive aspects of our lives. One by one, we make mental note of things we’re grateful for. If we can’t think of any, we begin with air, water, food, then see what else occurs to us. As each blessing comes to mind, we picture it clearly and see ourselves benefiting from it. We breathe it in, and breathe out heartfelt gratitude. This is an exercise we can do any time of the day or night, even in situations when we’re not alone. It need only take a few moments.

Cultivating gratitude can help change our belief that what lies ahead will be burdensome. When you’re ready to begin exploring the Steps, you may even feel the joy and excitement that accompany an adventure.

Today, I feel life’s richness and beauty. I let it fill me.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

AA is full of paradoxes. Our great Victory came as a result of our unconditional surrender; because we fell we are able to lift others; because of our mental, moral and spiritual illness we attained a health we never had in our non-alcoholic days; because we were social outcasts we have become the hope of society.

Alcoholism, which was our weakness, has indeed become our strength.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Don’t judge yourself by the way you feel.

2) Sometimes you have to stop looking to find what you need.

3) FUBAR: ****ed Up Beyond All Recognition

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Way

Dear Lord, today I pray:
The way is long
Let us go together.
The way is difficult
Let us help each other.
The way is joyful
Let us share it.
The way is ours alone
Let us go in love.
The way grows before us
Let us begin.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CLAIMING OUR DAILY BREAD

The common mistake, of course, is to suppose that a formal recognition of God is sufficient, or that that talking about divine things is the same as possessing them; but this is exactly on a par with supposing that looking at a tray of food, or discussing the chemical composition of sundry foodstuffs, is the same thing as actually eating a meal. It is this mistake that is responsible for the fact that people sometimes pray for a thing for years without any tangible results. If prayer is a force at all, it cannot be possible to pray without something happening. Pray regularly and quietly—then presently, the realization will come.

Another reason why the symbol of bread for the experience of the Presence of God is such a telling one, is that the act of eating food is essentially a thing that must be done for oneself. No one can assimilate food for another. In the same way, the realization of the Presence of God is a thing that no one can have for us.

For he satisfieth the longing soul, and filleth the hungry soul with goodness (Psalm 107:9).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Priorities

If you greatly desire something, have the guts to stake everything on obtaining it.

~ Brendan Francis ~

“You’ve got to hear this woman play the violin,” my friend Albert elbowed me. “It will bring you to tears.” (That wouldn’t surprise me, I thought—some of my friends have played the violin for me, and each time I wanted to cry.) When Barbara played at the concert I was attending, however, I was moved to my depths. She wielded the bow with awesome mastery and extracted a tone from her instrument unlike any I have ever heard. Within moments I was enraptured, and I did not want Barbara to stop. When she did, the audience gave her a standing ovation.

After the concert, Albert told me, “The way that Barbara got that violin a Stradivarius was as amazing as her performance. She was looking for a new violin in a modest price range, but when she found this violin, she knew it was for her. As you can expect, the price was astronomical. So she sold her house to buy the violin.”

I believe that Barbara made the right choice. The breadth of passion, joy, and beauty she brought into the world through playing that violin far exceeded any gifts she might have offered by inviting friends to her house for tea.

It is said that “all healing occurs outside of the safety zone.” In the same way success and extraordinary beauty are born of leaps of faith. When your heart is intent on living your dream, you will gladly let go of everything that is unlike the dream in order to manifest your vision.

Give me the knowledge of my worthiness, and the courage to invest in myself.

I am willing to give it all to have it all.

[majestyjo]

February 12

Step by Step

Today, trust and have faith in the program more a fear of relapsing and tempting fate with “just one.” Instead of the emotional and physical demands of running ahead of the threat to sobriety, I will expend them on the faith, trust, confidence and safety of the program. In AA, I have been given the simple steps of surrender, action and service, and each is stronger than my preoccupation with fear of losing what I have gained. Today, AA is stronger than my alcoholism, and I have no reason other than insecurity to fear anything. Today, I will acknowledge the power of recovery. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

LET GO, LET GOD

WILL POWER = Our WILL-ingness to us a HIGHER POWER.

~ Anonymous ~

One of the greatest decisions any of us ever made concerned our Third Step. This decision seemed to go against everything we wanted to do. We all know so well that every time we tried to manage our own lives, we produced misery and heartache. Human beings seem created to fight the decision in Step Three, very hard for us to make, was one of the greatest decisions we ever made.

When we did our Third Step, we merely embraced the truth. When we decided to let God be God, we were able to participate in the plan. Whenever we let go and let God, we become a player on a team that will always win.

When what I knew in the past was mostly failure, the decision to let God’s will become mine continues to make sense.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Growing old is not growing up.

~ Doug Horton ~

We have all met men who seemed very wise and strong for their age and other men who seemed immature and stuck in a boyish mind with an aging body. So we ask, what is a truly grown-up man? We think of masculine values we admire, such as strength, courage, the ability to think for oneself, wisdom, self-respect, and a sense of balance and proportion in one’s actions and relationships.

Many of us have felt that we never really grasped the key to what adult masculinity was all about. We could play the role, and we could make it look pretty good, but we didn’t feel in our hearts that it was ours. By walking the daily path in which we get to know ourselves from the inside, and by learning to stay true to ourselves, we develop a true self. Our true self is, by definition, no longer trapped in boyhood. We have found our inner gyroscope, and from that comes the sterling feeling of authenticity that we wouldn’t trade for anything.

Today I am grateful for the wisdom and strength of character that is growing within.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Each day is a “workshop.” Let’s remember to keep our minds and hearts open so we won’t miss our opportunities.

~ Dudley Martineau ~

Looking at every day as a workshop for more productive or rewarding living eases the dread of new or unfamiliar circumstances. Developing the belief that we will be given exactly what we need to learn will change how we meet every twenty-four hours.

Before recovery we expected life to be hard. Our jobs often felt like drudgery. Our families seldom gave us the affirmation we longed for. Friends were unavailable. What we felt we deserved and sought, we often didn’t find. That was then. This is now.

It’s a simple change in perspective to come to believe that we are given what we need from our jobs, our families, our friends, every day. Accepting this belief will influence the outcome of every experience. Our lives will never seem the same.

I paid my dues for today’s workshop by becoming abstinent. What I will learn is up to me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

It is an honor to be supportive

It’s an honor (and a gift) when a friend calls for support. As I listen, I am reminded of my own stages of recovery—what I’ve felt, experienced, learned.

And when I listen deeply—when I am fully present—I can see myself in the speaker and realize that in my own right, I have more to learn. I have come to see that recovery is discovery—a wondrous experience of becoming open to whatever life brings.

I will welcome and respect any call for support as a chance to learn more about recovery—as a “teacher.”

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

A soft answer turneth away wrath…

~ Proverbs 15:1 ~

There is nothing wrong with anger. Anger tells us we need to pay attention, that something’s happening to us. But we may need to learn new ways of expressing anger. We need to take responsibility for our feelings and use “I” statements to tell others how we feel without putting other people on the defensive.

Expressing anger in a healthy way is a skill, and we can learn it. As with all skills, it will take practice to develop new ways of expressing our anger. But we can learn to be assertive, not aggressive, even when we’re angry. Our recovery program can teach us ways to let go of anger, and can help us learn new healthy ways of telling loved ones how we really feel and what we need.

Anger needs expression. Without expression it builds, it simmers, it stockpiles, it blurts out sideways through sarcasm or whining, it ferments into resentment. With practice, however, we can make anger an ally instead of an enemy.

Today help me find a healthy way to express my anger.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

There are no victims, only volunteers.

~ Anonymous ~

Are you a volunteer for pain and negativity? If you are uncomfortable talking to a constant complainer, do you make yourself accessible, or do you avoid that person? If someone asks you to do something that makes you un-comfortable, such as attending a party where you know there will be drinking or using, do you say yes or no? If someone tells you a tale of woe, do you try to match the story with your own heartbreak? If someone asks, “How are you?” do you put on a sad-sack face and share all the things in your life that make you feel unhappy?

When you volunteer for pain and negativity, you continually place yourself in situations that perpetuate them. So rather than stay in an uncomfortable situation, leave. Excuse yourself from conversations or activities with those whose words or actions bring you down. Strive to respond positively, rather than negatively, to others. Seek out people who are centered and optimistic and who have inspiring things to say. Seek out the positive in all that you do, and you will find that you no longer want or need to be a volunteer for negativity!

Today I will choose to participate in helpful, positive, and up- lifting experiences. Such things can provide more comfort and joy in my life.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Be aware of yourself and validate your experience. Pay attention to your world, to what’s happening, and why. . . . Feel your strength. Value it, and use it.

~ Alexandra G. Kaplan ~

To truly exist in the here and now, we need to feel ourselves in the present. We need to enter each moment without the excess baggage of the past, nor the anticipation of the future.

How do we think or feel in the present? Take away thoughts of other times and we may feel lost and confused. It takes time to learn to live in the present and to trust it. We need to learn that, for as long as we’re in the present, we exist. We are.

Imagine the moment as a brand new car. All we need to do is open the door, hop in, and drive away. For that moment, our thoughts will not be focused on cars we used to own or on those we’re going to buy in the future. Instead, for that moment, we are in the here and now. That’s how each of our moments can be: fresh and clean and exciting.

I can sit in the driver’s seat and experience each moment as it occurs. Therein lies my strength.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Living today

Sometimes we expect so much so fast that we become nervous wrecks. Expecting answers for tomorrow’s or next week’s problem is not living today.

If we have a problem today, let us retake the Third Step, offer the problem to our Higher Power for an answer, and practice patience with the future.

Can I work on just today’s problem?

Higher Power, help me live one day at a time and to accept your answers when you send them.

My plan for working on today’s problem is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

When God wants to he what is not God, man comes to be.

~ KARL RAHNER ~

Newcomer

I listened to a long reading from the AA Big Book that was all about atheists and agnostics, and how, if they expect to stay in recovery, they have to recognize the evidence that God exists. I didn’t find the God argument very convincing. Sometimes I think that the program literature is incredibly illogical and old-fashioned.

Sponsor

Yes, there are days like that. I, too, have sat in meetings saying, “No, no, no” to everything that I heard said about God. Though I may resist certain ideas, it helps me to remember that this isn’t a debating society. I don’t have to agree with everything I hear, but I’m not in this program to make intellectual arguments against the existence of a Power greater than myself. The intellect I’m so proud of today neither prevented me from engaging in addictive behavior nor led me to recovery. I’m here to address my addiction, and my path is the path of my spirit.

Each of us knows what our own experience of a Higher Power is. We don’t find this Power through argument—our own or anyone else’s—but through going deep within. We know that when we entered recovery, we surrendered our heavy task of trying to be God. Our egos are no longer in charge.

Today, I don’t have to be my own Higher Power.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

From the beginning of recorded history man has had his difficulties to overcome. In fact, history is a recording of these ordeals.

We, of this highly mechanized age, have turned our problems over to bigger and bigger machines to do our work for us. We have raised economic efficiencies to the point where we can provide all our needs and luxuries by easy work in just a few days a week. We are going soft.

No wonder, then, that when a problem confronts us we try to escape it by hiding in a bottle. We try to escape the seriousness of living, forgetting that when life ceases to be serious it will become a joke—at our expense.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Feelings are not facts.

2) Denial is not a river in Egypt, but you can drown in it.

3) Grateful alcoholics don’t drink, and drinking alcoholics aren’t grateful.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

On Awakening

God, please direct my thinking, especially move it from self-pity, dishonest and self-seeking motives.

As I go through the day and face indecision, please give me the inspiration, an intuitive thought, or a decision. Make me relax and take it easy; don’t let me struggle. Let me rely upon Your inspiration, intuitive thoughts, and decision instead of my old ideas.

Show me all through the day what my next step is to be and give me whatever I need to take care of each problem. God, I ask You especially for freedom from self-will and I make no requests for myself only. But give me the knowledge of Your will for me and the power to carry it out in every contact during the day.

As I go through this day, let me pause when agitated or doubtful and ask You for the right thought or action. Let me constantly be reminded that I am no longer running the show, humbly saying many times each day, “Thy will be done” and agreeing that it is.

I will then be in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. I will be more efficient. I won’t be burning up energy foolishly as I was when trying to run life to suit myself. I will let You discipline me in this simple way. I will give You all the responsibility and all the praise.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

OUR DAILY BREAD

In speaking of the “bread if life,” Jesus calls it our daily bread. The reason for this is very fundamental—our contact with God must be a living one. It is our monetary attitude that governs our being.

. . . behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation (2 Corinthians 6:2)

The most futile thing in the world is to seek to live upon a past realization. The thing that means spiritual life to you is your realization of God here and now.

Be thankful for yesterday’s experience, knowing that it is with you forever in the consciousness that it brought about, but do not lean upon it for a single moment for the need of today. The manna in the desert is the Old Testament prototype of this daily nourishment. The people wandering in the wilderness were told that they would be supplied with manna from heaven every day but they were on no account to try to save it up for the morrow. When, notwithstanding the rule, some of them did try to live upon yesterday’s food, the result was pestilence or death.

So it is with us. The art of life is to live in the present moment, and to make that moment as perfect as we can by the realization that we are the instruments and expression of God Himself.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Sweet Success

Disappointments are the hooks upon which God hangs his victories.

~ Anonymous ~

Let me tell you about a man who was plagued by defeat. In ’31 he failed in business and declared bankruptcy. In ’32 he lost an election for the legislature. In ’34 his business failed again, and he declared bankruptcy a second time. The following year, his fiancee died. The year after that, he suffered a nervous breakdown. Two years later, in ’38 he was defeated in another election. In ’43 he ran for the U.S. Congress and lost. In ’46 he made another bid for a seat in Congress, and he was defeated. In ’48 he ran again for Congress, and again he lost. Seven years later, he entered a race for the U.S. Senate, and he was defeated. In ’56 his name was placed on the ballot for the Vice Presidency of the United States, and he lost the election. In ’58 he ran for the Senate and lost again.

In ’60—1860— he was elected President of the United States. His name was Abraham Lincoln. In spite of an incredible string of setbacks, he went on to become one of the greatest statesmen of history. He said, “You can–not fail unless you quit.”

The greatest victories are those we must persevere to accomplish. It is rare that great people just show up on the planet shining in glory. Often the most powerful world-change agents grow through experience and adversity. As a young lawyer, Mahatma Gandhi was literally laughed out of court when he became tongue-tied while arguing a ten-dollar case. Later he was thrown off a South African train because his skin was dark. Gandhi went on to become one of the greatest human liberators of the 20th century.

Eat defeat for breakfast. Do not let setbacks put you off; instead, use them as springboards to the success you desire. Only those who are willing to go the distance can taste the sweetness of victory.

Help me to not be put off by setbacks. Give me the strength to go all the way.

I succeed because I make up my mind to emerge victorious.

[caressa222]

February 13

Step by Step

Today, understand that not reaching back into yesterday and bringing the emotional baggage of regret, shame and grief into today is easier said than done, Instead come to terms by pledging once again to the program. If I can remember that most of the emotional wounds I bear today were bred on the battleground of active alcoholism, I ask for the wisdom not to deepen those wounds by way of a slip or relapse. As for dealing with any hurts from past losses, regrets and anything else bad, I must first forgive myself for my role in bringing on those injuries, and I must believe that my strongest amend is not to take the action that set it off – drink. Today, I confess that ignoring the mistakes of my past condemns me to repeat them, and my recovery may well hinge on staying in a program of recovery – and starting the process of forgiving myself. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERENITY

Give me, kind Heaven, a private station ~ a mind serene for contemplation.

~ Alexander Pope ~

Serenity must be a permanent state of mind, not a temporary experience. We know that some degree of serenity must be present before acceptance is possible. Acceptance is an ongoing act required for any success in a recovery program. Therefore, it is obvious that we can’t afford to settle for merely feeling at peace.

Peace of mind is a mood we can create for ourselves only. Peace leaves as an attitude changes. Serenity is a life-time possession because it is not only with us but also within us. It cannot be taken away.

Serenity is positive. It is not a placid or negative state of being. It is a positive force for good.

Today, I’ll remember serenity comes and lasts when I stay tuned to God’s will and the principles of the Program.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

I’m more like I am now than I ever was before.

~ Anonymous ~

We are becoming more ourselves. That is our true calling. If we grow wiser and stronger with life experience, we learn to know ourselves and we find the confidence and courage to fulfill our best self. We walk a path that is sometimes very difficult and complicated. Weighing the choices before us, we seldom have a clear, unequivocal answer. But as we know ourselves better and as we gain confidence, we gradually fulfill our true nature.

A story in the Talmud describes a man at the end of his life who fears that he will be judged by God for not living a life like Moses. The rabbi replies that God will not judge him for not being Moses, but for not being himself.

Today I will allow myself to be more like I am than I ever did before.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Our inner journey is a transformative process. It involves becoming who we already are in essence and letting go of the phony in favor of the authentic self.

~ Mary Norton Gordon ~

Wearing the right face for every occasion was a goal many of us strived to master in years past. Quite likely we succeeded too. We were accomplished at reading the faces of others, discerning who we needed to be in order to please them. Our worth seemed dependent on pleasing them.

Recovery doesn’t mean we stop pleasing others. Learning to love others unconditionally, thus inspiring joy in them, is a benefit of recovery. But pleasing ourselves is of utmost importance too, and we can feel good about ourselves only if we are living honest lives. That means wearing the face that matches who we really are inside.

Our lives become less confusing as we learn to 11*veal our true selves. When we stop trying to be the person we think others want us to be, we will find more time to simply love them for the person they are, and to love ourselves too.

I will please others simply by loving them as they are today. I can be honest and loving just being me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to deal with my painful emotions

I feel alone, lost, and afraid. Again. Once again I find myself thinking about escaping from my sadness and anger by getting high. Yet I would only plunge myself into more guilt, shame, and remorse. Instead of producing relief, it would produce a lapse.

I don’t want to do this again. It hurts too much and helps too little. But the good news is that I am slowly, truly, learning that using drugs and alcohol doesn’t prevent emotions, it only postpones them. It keeps me from facing them and then adds a new layer of painful emotions. I am looking forward to change.

When I need to release pain, I will try writing about it, drawing it, or talking about it with a friend, sponsor, or therapist.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Humility is like your underwear; it shouldn’t show.

~ Anonymous ~

Humility is knowing there are forces outside ourselves, like the grace of God, and family and friends, who have helped shape our lives. There is no humility without gratitude.

It’s always nice to be with humble people because no matter how talented or experienced or successful they are, they will treat us with dignity and respect and be genuinely interested in us. Humble people appreciate themselves and other people, and know the value of others’ experiences and wisdom. We know who the humble people are, not because they’ve told us about their humility, but because we can see it in the way they live their lives. In time, we can become more like them.

Today let me practice humility, and in doing so attain the wisdom and peace it brings.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

God gave us life. What are we willing to give him in return?

~ Oral Lee Brown ~

Think of those people who only call when they need something, rarely if ever give a gift, say they are too busy to offer assistance, or focus solely on themselves in conversations. You would consider such people to be selfish, and you might, over time, distance yourself from them.

Now think about your relationship with your Higher Power. How frequently do you connect with your Higher Power? Do you pray only when you need something? Do you think and speak only of yourself in your prayers?

Just as there is a balance of give and take between two people in a healthy relationship, so should there be a healthy give and take between you and your Higher Power. Ask what assistance your Higher Power needs so that this loving presence can be felt by those around you. Open your heart and fill it with love and compassion, even for those you may not like. And set aside time to assist others who are less fortunate, so that they may understand that God considers the needs of all.

Today I offer assistance to my Higher Power. In my prayers, I will ask of what service I can be so that my usefulness on earth can benefit those around me.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Have you learned lessons only of those who admired you, and were tender with you, and stood aside for you? Have you not learned great lessons from those who braced themselves against you, and disputed the passage with you?

~ Walt Whitman ~

Wouldn’t it be grand if we could have everything our way! We’d have people at our beck and call. We’d never have to take responsibility for ourselves, never have to struggle for anything, never be refused any wish or want.

But how would we mature? Learning involves gains based on the effort we expend. We learned early that we couldn’t listen to a music box unless we wound it. We learned we couldn’t get good grades unless we studied. And now we’ve learned we can’t change our behaviors without working the program.

If we can’t see the results of the energy we put into things, then our motivation, determination, and confidence can’t grow. Some things will come easily, some won’t. But the things we work on now will mean the most in the end.

I am not afraid to put energy into something I really want. I need to do this for my self-esteem.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Solving problems

If we start the morning feeling hopeless, our day doesn’t stand a chance. But if we ask our Higher Power for help in the morning and then accept the help throughout the day, we won’t have to solve any problems alone.

We will see that problems can be resolved, and we are responsible only for our efforts. Do I leave the solutions to God?

Higher Power, grant me the strength to ask for help and simply to do my part well.

Today I will work on three problems and leave the solutions to God.
The problems are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The business of being human among other humans is holy business.

~ CATHERINE MADSEN ~

Newcomer

I keep hearing that this isn’t a religious program. So why is the word “God” everywhere? It’s in the Steps, and I hear people use it when they share in meetings. When they say “HP,” doesn’t it mean the same thing? And then there’s all this prayer and “spiritual awakening” stuff. How can you say it isn’t religious?

Sponsor

There is a big difference between the religious and the spiritual. This is a spiritual program. When I see in Step Twelve the words “having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps,” I think, not of a voice from the mountaintop, but of the ways my spirit has come alive—how I’ve become capable of living in the here and now, connected to my fellow human beings, conscious of so much I used to miss out on.

The program makes suggestions, not rules. There are no priests or rabbis, no prescribed beliefs, no blasphemies, no excommunication. “God as we understood Him” and “Higher Power” are terms meant to allow each of us his or her own understanding of the energy that sustains us. This program is not about what we believe, but about what actions we take—how we stay away from addictive substances, how we help others to stay on the path of recovery.

Today, I know that many things other than my own will are sustaining me.
I don’t have to be in charge of my own recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

No election is won or lost until all the votes are in. On that occasion when we felt all was lost, that we had utterly failed and despaired of help from any source, we found the doors of our Fellowship and learned the underlying causes of our failure.

It was the admission of our failure, our complete inability to manage our lives, that opened the door to the greatest blessing. Over and beyond sobriety, through happiness and peace of mind, we finally found a conscious contact with a God of our own understanding.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) When making amends, a subtle shift occurs in our thinking. We go from thinking we were a mistake to acknowledging we made a mistake.

2) Don’t take yourself too darn seriously.

3) Success is not getting what you want; it’s knowing what you don’t need.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

A Morning Prayer

Good morning, God. You are ushering in another day, all nice and freshly new.
Here I come again, dear Lord. Please renew me too.
Forgive the many errors that I made yesterday 
And let me come again, dear God, to walk in Your own way.
But, God, You know I cannot do it on my own.
Please take my hand and hold it tight, for I cannot walk alone.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES

Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us (Matthew 6:12).

This clause is the running point of the Prayer. It is the strategic key. Having told us what God is, how the universe works, how we are to do our own work, what our true nourishment or supply is, and the way in which we can obtain it, he now comes to the forgiveness of sins.

The forgiveness of sins is the central problem of life. Sin is a sense of separation from God, and is the major tragedy of human experience. It is, of course, rooted in selfishness. It is essentially an attempt to gain some suppose good to which we are not entitled in justice. It is a sense of isolated, self-regarding, personal existence, whereas the Truth of Being is the all is One. Our true selves are at One with God, undivided from Him, expressing His ideas, witnessing to His nature. Because we are all one with the great Whole of which we are spiritually a part, it follows that we are one with all men.

Evil, sin, the fall of man, in fact, is essentially the attempt to negate this Truth. We try to live apart from God. We act as though we could have plans and purposes and interests separate from him. All this, if it were true, would mean that existence is not one and harmonious, but a chaos of competition and strife. But, of course, it is not true, and therein lies the joy of life.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Still Good

The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles.

~ Bernard Baruch ~

“How’s everything going?” my friend Tori asked me as we passed in a restaurant.

“Life is good,” I answered readily.

“It sure is,” Tori agreed. “Even at its worst, life is still good.”

Even when times are tough and we can’t see our direction, life is a gift. Sometimes the hardest times are our most productive and growth producing. I visited the home of a very wealthy doctor named John in Bremerton, Washington, where he and his family lived in a magnificent mansion with a heavenly view of the Olympic Mountains. John owned several expensive automobiles, played on a world-class pool table in his den, and enjoyed many comforts and luxuries.

As I chatted with his family over dinner, John reminisced, “When we first got married, we had nothing. We lived in a tiny apartment and watched our pennies. Jan worked hard to help us get by while I was immersed in school; we really didn’t know how we were going to make it. As I look back now, that was one of the best times of our life. In a way I enjoyed that period of earnest striving more than being successful and having all this stuff. ”

Life is always good. It isn’t always comfortable, easy, or understand–able, but it is good. Sometimes the most difficult moments bring us together in ways that we would miss if we stayed isolated. When I lived in New Jersey, the only time I saw and talked to some of my neighbors was after a snowstorm, when we would help push each other’s cars out of the snow. Many families have told me that a health crisis reunited them in a way that never would have happened otherwise.

Life is good, even at its worst. Love is always present.

Thank You for all the blessings You shower on me, even when I am not aware of them. Help me to continually celebrate the goodness of the life You give.

I bless every experience, trusting that God is with me.

[caressa222]

February 14

Step by Step

Today, no concession to any disappointment or fear of someone or something gone wrong, no caving in to self-pity as an excuse to wallow in the “poor me’s.” Sobriety does not promise being spared setbacks, disappointment, fears and seemingly insurmountable challenges – everyone faces them. As an alcoholic with a personality that is both emotionally and spiritually challenged I might be apt to “give up,” “give in” and whine, “Why me?” Answer: why not? AA has given me the tools to meet setbacks and disappointments effectively. It is up to me to use them. Today, then, I will meet disappointment, fear, frustration, anger and anything else potentially lethal as a challenge to find and nourish them into something less than bad. But I first must be in a place where I don’t want to twist anything into an excuse to drink, use, gamble, over-eat, whatever. Today, I choose not to want to return to the very dark place from whence I came. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

LOVE IS…

The pleasure of love is in loving.

~ La Rochefoucauld ~

Love is one of the most useful tools we have for building a house for spiritual living. We received love generously from new friends in our Fellowship who told us, “Let us love you until you can learn to love yourself.” Today we are happiest when we give love rather than seek it.

Love is being available to anyone who is in need. May we always give love to the seemingly unlovable until we can see them as lovable. Our ultimate joy would be to do, each day, one act of love in such a way that nobody but us would ever know its origin.

In recovery, the simplest love we can give is to wish others well. Our worst enemy would never deserve a wish that they resume the bondage of addiction.

Today, I’ll find love in my Higher Power, the Program, and my friends.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

All our loves are first loves.

~ Susan Fromberg Schaeffer ~

When we fall in love with someone, it is a unique thing that comes from deep within us. Any relationship is the creation of two people who open themselves to each other and share themselves beyond the usual boundaries. That is the excitement of true love. Two people give each other the keys to their private world, just as we might share the key to our home, trusting that it will be used with care and respect. This intimacy isn’t usually instantaneous. It builds on experience together.

In an intimate relationship, we have the responsibility to be good stewards of the trust given to us. Looking at our partner’s role is always so much easier than looking at our own, but we need to resist that easy temptation. Our first questions should always be, Do I make it safe for my partner to be open with me? Do I take my partner’s vulnerability as a trust that I do not abuse? Am I gentle and respectful with the key my partner gave me?

Today I will be a good partner, honoring and guarding the trust I have been given. 

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

My husband, four children, six grandchildren, and four great-grandchildren are the most important things in my life. I love them all.

~ Thelma Elliott ~

Liking, let alone loving, those closest to us seems elusive at times, because as relatives, we seldom put on our best face for each other. With ease we express our criticism. But coming to really love the members of our family, loving their faults as well as their strengths, will help us love ourselves. And loving ourselves is the primary lesson we are here to learn.

By the time we reach this program, we all have numerous regrets. But we can make amends and demonstrate through changed behavior our new commitment to acting from an attitude of love. Time is too fleeting and life too fragile to let our most important companions walk by unnoticed, unappreciated, unloved. Each family member will benefit, but even more important, our spirits will be lifted each time loving thoughts guide our actions.

I will take time to notice the most important friends I have, my family. Each family member will get my love and kind thoughts today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can be forgiven

As I look closely at I disagreeets and liabilities in Step Four, I see mistakes I am not proud of. I see mistakes that I still feel guilty about. It hurts to realize that I cannot undo them. It hurts even to admit them.

Yet in my dual recovery program, there is forgiveness. The more meetings I attend and the more I share, the more I sense the love and care of my fellow members. And as they accept me where I am in recovery—with my faults, failings, and problems—the more I accept myself, and the less shameful and guilty I feel. In the fellowship, I experience true forgiveness.

I will forgive one mistake I make today and one mistake of another.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

A mighty fortress is our God.

~ Martin Luther ~

Our Higher Power is there for us when we need a safe place, a place where there is only love. That fortress shields us from the dangers of the world, the thoughtless word, the unkind deed. Without judgment or criticism, our Higher Power loves us as we are, flaws and all. No one else can give us this kind of acceptance. No one else can bring us this kind of peace. How wonderful to be loved no matter what we do, no matter what mistakes we might make, to be loved and nurtured even when we don’t love ourselves.

Our Higher Power is there for us, any time we are in need, in the midst of a crowd or on an empty street. Springing from the goodness in us, our Higher Power will never abandon us, but is in us and with us forever. We can see our Higher Power’s grace everywhere we look, in the goodness of others, in nature, in a newborn baby, or in an older individual. Always, our Higher Power is there to protect, love, support, and nurture us.

Today let me give thanks for my Higher Power. Help me be grateful for the gifts I’ve been given.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We do not love people because they are beautiful, but be-cause they seem beautiful to us because we love them.

~ Russian proverb ~

How would you write the words “I love you” to someone you love, using twenty-five words or less and without using the words “I love you”?

Intimate relationships can have a profound influence in your life. They can take you outside yourself, encouraging you to think about and give to others. They can make the less enjoyable aspects of life more enjoyable by providing companionship, communication, and support. They can bring you shared experiences, joy, and laughter. They can offer romance and passion. They can provide stability and security. They can strengthen and deepen love, both self-love and love for another person.

Perhaps the love you feel today is different from love you were shown in the past. The healthier you become, the more you will understand that love has a far deeper meaning than sex. Love is based on courtesy and kind-ness, openness and honesty, and acceptance and trust. Love is having a generous heart, a willingness to forgive mistakes, and a desire to see and fully accept who another person is.

Today I will write an “I love you” essay to someone I love. I will focus on the good qualities of that person and communicate how wonderful our love feels.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I will love you no matter what. I will love you if you are stupid, if you slip and fall on your face, if you do the wrong thing, if you make mistakes, if you behave like a human being—I will love you no matter.

~ Leo Buscaglia ~

Wouldn’t it be nice if there were just one person in our lives who loved us no matter what our faults? And wouldn’t it be equally nice if we, too, could love just one person in the same way?

Love is not an easy emotion for us to feel. In the past we may have associated feelings of love with negative feelings such as pain, hurt, rejection, or disappointment. But we can put the negative feelings aside and learn how to feel love as a positive emotion.

Love does not necessarily mean sexual attraction or commitment. Love can simply be seeing someone for who he or she is, whether that person is a friend, co-worker, boss, family member, or lover. To show love, we can keep our actions simple—by making a phone call, writing a letter, or sharing a hug. Let’s show someone we care.

How can I use Keep It Simple to show someone I care?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Learning that God is love

“God is love.” Through love our lives can be made whole. If we love ourselves, we don’t abuse our bodies with alcohol and other drugs. If we love ourselves, we don’t mistreat our minds with hate. If we love ourselves, we don’t treat our fellows unkindly.

When we truly know that God is love—a love that includes suffering and pain as well as splendor and light—we need never be alone in despair again.

Do I know God is love?

Higher Power, I pray that I may know the meaning and power of your love.

I will seek to know God’s love today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

First, I came. Then I came to. Then I came to believe.

~ SAYING HEARD AT MEETINGS ~

Newcomer

Step Two begins, “We came to believe …” I’m uncomfortable with the idea that sooner or later I’m going to have to have the same belief in God that everyone else here has.

Sponsor

I’d be uncomfortable with that, too. Step Two isn’t about sticking around until your beliefs are similar to others’ beliefs. I can assure you that not everyone here shares the same spiritual beliefs or practices. Far from it.

I didn’t come here seeking to embrace a particular, prescribed belief, but I did come here seeking something. Addiction was in charge of my life. It had been a long time since I’d felt that I could truly believe in myself, in my connection with others. I was exhausted, scared, unhappy. Some people call this “rock bottom.” Some call it a spiritual crisis.

When I could admit that I wanted to stop my addictive behavior and that I hadn’t been able to stay stopped on my own, something changed. After coming to some meetings, I felt less alone, and I felt hope. I could look within myself and acknowledge that something in me wanted to live. The life spirit at the center of my existence was waking up. I wanted to be whole again.

In Step Two, we begin to accept that healing is possible, and that, in fact, it has begun.

Today, I look inward and see light and health.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Comparatively early in our drinking careers we knew our principal fault was our drinking, and we even knew but would not admit that our other faults were the offspring of the first.

We changed brands, we switched from whisky to beer, we changed our drinking companions, we put more time between drinks, we changed jobs, wives, localities. Somehow it never occurred to us that the only way to deal with our drinking was to abandon it to a glow death by starvation.

You can’t shoot, drown or strangle alcoholism but you can abandon it.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) GIFT: God Is Forever There

2) Focus on the program, not the problem.

3) If you saw myself as others see you, would you deny it?

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Who, Me?

I need to be forgiven, Lord, so many times a day. So often do I stumble and fall. Be merciful, I pray. Help me to not be critical when others’ faults I see. For so often, Lord, the same faults are in me.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

AS WE FORGIVE

As we repeat the Great Prayer intelligently, we are suddenly caught up and grasped as though in a vice, so that we must face this problem of separation from God. We must extend forgiveness to everyone.

Notice that Jesus does not say, “forgive me my trespasses and I will try to forgive others.” He obliges us to declare that we have actually forgiven, and He makes our claim to our forgiveness to depend upon that. Who could be so insane as to endeavor to seek the Kingdom of God without desiring to be relieved of his own sense of guilt? We trapped in the inescapable position that we cannot demand our own release before we have released our brother.

Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts (Psalm 139:23).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Be My Valentine

O, be swift to love! Make haste to be kind.

~ Henri F. Amiel ~

The legend of St. Valentine goes back to the early days of Christianity when Christians were being persecuted by the Romans. One Christian, Valentinus, was tried as a heretic and sentenced to death. In prison, Valentinus befriended a guard who respected his wisdom, and soon the guard brought his seven-year-old blind daughter, Julia, to Valentinus for lessons. Daily, the two talked of important things, and Julia developed a deep love and respect for her mentor. One day Julia asked him, “Valentinus, do you think I will ever be able to see?”

Valentinus thought for a moment and answered, “With love in your heart and belief in God, anything is possible, Julia.”

At that moment, Julia was overtaken with a flash of light, and suddenly her eyesight was restored. “Valentinus, I can see!” the child shouted.

“Praise be to God,” he humbly answered.

The next day when Julia came to visit Valentinus, he was gone. He had been taken to his execution. Julia found this note:

My Dear Julia,

Although we shall never see each other again, know that I will always love you. You are very dear to me. I will stay unseen by your side, and I will live in your heart. I believe in you.

Your Valentine

Be a true valentine by reminding your beloved ones that they are un–limited. Inspire them to trust their heart’s wisdom, and miracles will occur. And if you are your own valentine, remember that all the love you need is within you, just as you are, right where you are.

I pray to remind my loved ones of their highest possibilities.

I create miracles by using the vision of divine love.

[majestyjo]

February 15

Step by Step

Today, carry from yesterday into this current 24 Hours the gratitude for all that has been given by the program and sobriety. I can claim a renewed faith because gratitude, if sincere and unselfish, DOES yield the fruits of humility, awakening and serenity – all that is promised in the program. But in having gratitude rewarded in an expected way, pray that my faith in my Higher Power and the program be strengthened and its power undiminished by time or human follies of greed, selfishness, a demand for more. Today, the gratitude of yesterday has evolved into a faith that, when conveyed without expectation of something in return, when sincere and when humble, can and does yield dividends of unexpected payoffs. Today, my faith has been awakened. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE PROMISES

The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it.

~ Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous ~

On page 83 of the Big Book, there begins a long paragraph worthy of study. The sentences in that paragraph have been referred to as “The Promises.”

We who are finding spiritual growth should frequently take time to examine the promises we find in working our Program. We always discover that we are working toward a definite purpose for promised rewards.

Just before the listing of the Promises, we read that we will be surprised at the spiritual progress we have made after finishing the Ninth Step. The Ninth Step concerns making direct amends.

We once believed that we needed a certain substance or behaviour in order to avoid loneliness and boredom. The Promises get rid of that idea. We are made aware that “God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.”

After completing the journey through the first Nine Steps, the Promises begin to unfold for me.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

I imagine that God speaks to me, saying simply, “I kept calling to you, and you did not come.” And I answer quite naturally, “I couldn’t until I knew there was nowhere else to go.”

~ Florida Scott-Maxwell ~

We are willful. We worship individual determination and guts. A man wants to do things in the way that he devises for himself, and it may not occur to him to open himself up to a Higher Power. Yet our Higher Power is always there, calling to us.

There is a paradox in this spiritual lesson: more genuine strength and more options are in our hands when we let go of our willful, controlling attitudes. This is the secret wisdom of a man who has learned from experience. The young, unseasoned man tries to control everything and push on things that he cannot budge. The wiser, more experienced man says, “I see the limits of what is mine to change, and I can let my Higher Power take care of the things I cannot change.”

Today I will notice those concerns that I cannot fix, and I will let them go. Then I will focus on a few areas where I can make a difference. 

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Choices are not irrevocable. . . . They can be remade.

~ Julie Riebe ~

Knowing that we can make choices about every circumstance in our lives fills us with awe at the breadth of our personal power. For decades, perhaps, we felt we had none. Life was bleak and we were at its mercy. How thrilled we are to understand, finally, where our power begins.

We are learning so much from this program. At limes we wonder how we survived for so long on so little understanding. Our condition felt hopeless, and because we took no responsibility for changing our circumstances, nothing changed.

That’s true no more. Every day we intentionally make choices about what’s happening in our lives. Some choices, like changing a job or confronting a friend, are big. Others, like deciding whether to exercise today or tomorrow, are small. Large or small, our choices allow us to decide who we are, und none of our choices are without significance. I hat’s exciting!

I will choose carefully today. If a change of mind is in my best interest, then I can change my mind.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

It will help if I let go

When will this roller coaster ride stop? I work my dual recovery program for my addiction and psychiatric illness and still I have setbacks. I feel stuck. What else can I possibly do to get better? Sometimes I feel helpless. On very bad days, I feel hopeless.

And yet, when I take a deep breath and look back at the first three Steps, my program reminds me (yet again) that I do not control my dual illness. My program reminds me of my higher power who will help me cope with my struggles, who will help me recover, if I allow it. If I allow it, if I turn my will and my life over, I will know what to do to avoid the slips, prevent the setbacks, and regain stability. If I let that power help, I will get better.

I will review Steps One, Two, and Three and pray for courage.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Be honest with the man in the mirror.

We may find it easy to criticize another, to fault in him or her what we despise in ourselves. It takes so little effort to take another’s inventory. Yet, when we turn the magnifying glass on ourselves our vision blurs; we’re blinded by anxiety. For a long time chemicals blurred our vision. We were incapable of honesty and perhaps felt no desire to learn or change anything about ourselves.

Now we are asked to get spiritual, to get honest, to look at ourselves, to focus on the changes we need to make, and to leave others to their own keeping.

We can only change ourselves. Recovery asks that we acknowledge our shortcomings and pray for the courage to change the things we can. More than enough self-work lies ahead; enough to preclude our working on others. It’s important that we be real, that we not strive to be someone else. This is where the serenity to accept ourselves will come from.

Today help me tend my own garden and let others tend theirs.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The Wolf and the Crane

A wolf had been eating when a bone became stuck in his throat. Soon, the pain became excruciating. He rushed to a pond, thinking water would loosen the bone. But he could not swallow. Frantic, he looked around and saw a crane watching him. “I would give anything,” he rasped, “if you would remove this bone from my throat. Your neck is long and your beak is strong. Please help me.”

The crane agreed. It lowered its neck and put its long beak into the wolf’s throat, removing the bone. “I would now like the reward you promised,” said the crane.

But the wolf growled. “It is enough that you have placed your head into my strong jaws, and I have spared your life. Be gone with you, or you will be my next dinner.”

The moral of the story: An enemy’s promises were made to be broken.

While making a fearless moral inventory, you may remember when you mistreated others, pushed them aside when they tried to keep you safe, or made promises you did not keep. Your promise today—to live a clean and sober life—can help you to make amends to them.

Today I will make a list of those who helped me and were always there for me and make amends to them.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

People are lonely because they build walk instead of bridges.

~ Joseph Fort Newton ~

Remember building snow forts? After a sticky snowfall we’d build a big snow wall. Then we’d mass- produce snowballs, preparing for battle. The team who built the best snow fort usually won, for their wall provided the best protection.

Are we still playing snow fort when we meet new people or spend time with family? Each of us has a wall we started building in our childhood. Each time we were hurt, we would fortify the wall to offer greater protection. We may not even realize it now, but we may have such strong, high walls in front of us that even the most ardent friends can’t get over them.

We may feel protected behind our wall, but we may also feel lonely. Walls are built to keep people out. To feel less lonely, we need to make a little crawl space to let people in. We don’t have to destroy our walls in one day, but perhaps we can let at least one person in. We will learn, one person at a time, what it feels like to be less protected, and less lonely.

I can make an opening in my wall of protection and let someone get to know me. I will be safe.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Overcoming barriers

When situations seem the darkest, the storm may be about to break up and let the sun shine through. A bit more persistence, a bit more effort, and the emotional turmoil that seemed hopeless may resolve into a process of growth. All battles, whether won or lost, are internal.

God never places impossible barriers in front of us; our barriers are only those we create for ourselves.

Am I still erecting barriers against my own progress?

Higher Power, grant me the strength to carry on my internal struggles.

Today I will work on bringing down barriers by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

No one should have to dance backward all their lives.

~ JILL RUCKELSHAUS ~

Newcomer

When I was active in my addiction, I often felt smart and strong. Now that I’m in recovery, I feel little and weak and depressed. I’m afraid I’m never going to feel like a full human being again.

Sponsor

Many of us have similar fears at the beginning of recovery. Back in the early days of being active, we were convinced that we had the key to living. There were behaviors we engaged in that lent us feelings of power and control. We may look back wistfully at those days when we felt stronger, smarter, more important. We wish we could have those feelings again, without paying the penalty.

But we need to remember the deprivation or panic we felt when we had to do without whatever magic “pill” we depended on to put us together each day. We can’t forget the times when addiction only made bad situations worse. We don’t want to repeat the crash we experienced when the drug or addictive behavior stopped being effective and our self-doubts came back.

Strength, intelligence, and competence don’t, in fact, depend on addictive substances and behaviors. They are ours. They are returning to us over time in recovery, and in much more dependable ways.

Today, my gifts are emerging into the light.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

When we were drinking we all had an interest and it was all contained in the shortest word in the English language—I. Our conversations always started with—I need—I want—I said, etc. No wonder people crossed the street when they saw us coming. Our conversations were as obnoxious as our breath.

Take note of the older men on the Program; their conversations are seldom about themselves except ‘as they fit into the other fellow’s problems. It is no accident that they are popular with the group for they never bore you with themselves but instead they talk about your most popular subject—You.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Grateful I’m not dead.

2) You don’t make as many mistakes when you keep your mouth shut.

3) Egoism isn’t necessarily thinking a lot of yourself—just thinking of yourself a lot.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Let Go, Let God

Higher Power, help me to understand:
To “let go” does not mean to stop caring, it means I can’t do it for someone else.
To “let go” is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To “let go” is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To “let go” is not to try to change or blame another, it’s to make the most of myself.
To “let go” is not to care for but to care about.
To “let go” is not to fix but to be supportive.
To “let go” is not to judge but to allow another to be a human being.
To “let go” is not to protect, it’s to permit another to face reality.
To “let go” is not to deny but to accept.
To “let go” is not to nag, scold, or argue but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desires but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

DEMONSTRATING FORGIVENESS

And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise (Luke 6:31).

The forgiveness of others is the vestibule of Heaven. You have to get rid of all resentment and condemnation of others, and, not least, of self-condemnation and remorse. You have to forgive yourself, but you cannot forgive yourself sincerely until you have forgiven others first.

Of course, nothing in all the world is easier than to forgive people who have not hurt us very much. But what the Law of Being requires of us is that we forgive the very things that are so hard to forgive that at first it seems impossible to do it at all. But the Lord’s Prayer makes our own escape from guilt and limitation dependent upon just this very thing.

If your prayers are not being answered, search your consciousness and see if there is not some old circumstance about which you are still resentful. Search and see if you are not really holding a grudge against some individual, or some group. If so, then you will probably make your demonstration. If you cannot forgive at present, you will have to wait for your demonstration until you can, and you will have to postpone finishing your recital of the Lord’s Prayer too.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Maybe Better Off

Lust brings excitement. Love brings peace.

~ Harvey Freeman ~

When I was 15 years old, I saw a flashy red electric guitar hanging in a music store window. It was shiny, slickly shaped, and looked like the kind of guitar a rock star would play. I ran home and told my father that I absolutely had to have that guitar. “Do you know how to play it?” he asked.

“No, but I swear I’ll learn, ” I promised.

“Maybe you could take some guitar lessons on a basic model, and then if you still want this one, we can get it then,” he reasonably suggested.

“But Dad,” I argued, “then this guitar might not be there. I really want to get this one now”

My father looked me squarely in the eye and asked me the most compelling question he ever confronted me with. In Yiddish he asked, “Voss brendt ba dir?” which meant, “What’s burning in you? ” Needless to say, I didn’t get the guitar. But my father’s question still haunts me to this day: What’s burning in you?

While passion imbued by Spirit can save our life, passion directed by ego can ruin it. The fear-driven mind will tell us that we must have what we want, and we must have it now. The voice of peace, on the other hand, knows that all good things come to us by right of consciousness, and we do not have to fight, sweat, or rush to receive our good.

Looking back now, I realize it was a blessing that I didn’t get that guitar; the thing was all flash and no quality, and sooner or later I would have discovered I had made a bad deal. I was better off without it. My father’s words, however, have blessed me for a lifetime.

Help me to be patient to receive Your gifts. I pray to focus on what will truly bring me peace.

All quality things come to me at the right time by the hand of a gracious God.

[majestyjo]

February 16

Step by Step

Tuesday, Feb. 16, 2016

Today, and all other 24 Hours that might follow, no distinguishing myself as an “old-timer” from the newcomer to the program. Even though I’ve been around the program for years and if the 24 Hours since my last drink amounts to years, I am no “wiser” or more sober than the newcomer whose last drink was 24 Hours ago or who attended his first meeting last night – and he is no less sober than I. For in the program, the newcomer has exactly the same as the old-timer: sobriety in the current 24 Hours. And because our program is done one day at a time, the newcomer is as much an old-timer as I. The fall from a pedestal on which I might put myself or let anyone put me can be fatal. In AA, the field truly is level, and I can’t afford to lose sight of that reality. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE FIRST PROMISE

We will know a new freedom and happiness.

~ Big Book ~

A new freedom and happiness for us is an almost unbelievable Promise. Before recovery, we had little choice and less freedom. Everything we did had to be set up to meet the demands of our compulsion. Try as hard as we possibly could, we could never prevent the consuming urge of our addiction. A powerful compulsion took over all our waking hours.

Our lives were controlled by our desires. There was a constant need to bow to the demands of our addiction. It made all our decisions for us. There was no freedom and only a small bit of happiness at the very best. We always had to “pay the piper,” and we knew it. We were slaves, like it or not. When freedom came from abstinence, so came joy, gratitude, and love for others and ourselves.

I once believed that I could control my addiction. When I found it wasn’t possible, I felt deep depression, guilt, shame, and remorse. I felt I no longer had freedom. Recovery finally gave me a choice. Promises do come true.

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

All life is an experiment

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

When we take a trip, we make many plans and reservations. We have expectations for what we will see, whom we will visit, and what we will do. But the real purpose of a trip is to experience what happens while we follow our plans. We leave our routine of controlled and predictable days to enter another space where we will find novelty and the unpredictable. In fact, our whole life, from beginning to end, is a trip.

Once we accept that much of life is outside of our control, we can step aside. We make plans and work toward our highest goals. We take great pleasure in working toward our achievements. At the same time, the substance of life is not in controlling the outcomes but in responding to what happens along the way.

Today I will be open and respond to what happens while I follow my plans.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

No one can make you mad, sad, or glad but yourself.

~ Anonymous ~

Blaming someone else for who we are reflects our immaturity. If we are surrounded by people who don’t take care of themselves, we continue to blame others, quite successfully. We’ll never grow into the women we are capable of becoming until we accept full responsibility for our actions, thoughts, aspirations, defeats, and successes.

It’s not as hard to be responsible for ourselves as we might imagine. When we make the first move to be fully accountable, the feeling of being overwhelmed passes. Knowing that no one can ever make us feel uncomfortable, in any situation or circumstance, gives us immense relief. It’s akin to being given a new life, a new personality, a new future.

Knowing I will feel however I decide to feel today fills me with hope and enthusiasm.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I now know I need people

I’ve been thinking about how nervous I feel around people. I have a dual disorder and I feel different from them. In part, I’m afraid of having symptoms when others are present. Sometimes I feel embarrassed. Sometimes I’m too afraid to talk.

And then it dawned on me that, nowadays, even though my dual disorder makes it harder for me to be with people, I’m not willing to feel alone anymore. Deep down I crave companionship, friendship. I need people. These days in particular, I need the experience, strength, and hope of my fellow Twelve Steppers.

At my recovery meeting I will arrive early to help set up (or take a turn at being a greeter).

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Loneliness is the most terrible poverty.

~ Mother Teresa ~

We are so grateful that we’re no longer alone. For years we have hidden within ourselves and were alone with our secrets, shame, and fears. Now others in recovery will be with us, as much or as little as we need or want. We don’t have to hide anything from them. Their attitude of acceptance, encouragement, and good humor support us in ways we have never known. When we allow ourselves the luxury of that support, we are not only meeting our needs, we are letting the light of honesty and friendship into our lives.

It feels good not to hide anymore. And now it feels right, more natural. We are coming to accept and love our real selves as never before.

Today help me to be grateful for others’ support, and in turn to help someone else.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d druther not.

~ Mark Twain ~

While abstinence is an addict’s best choice to better health, it does not magically take away the harmful, and sometimes lasting, physical effects of addiction.

No matter what stage of recovery you are in, it is important to get a medical checkup each year. Be honest with your doctor about your past lifestyle so you can receive appropriate attention and treatment. Make it your daily effort to strictly adhere to your physician’s advice.

There are other things you can do to build and maintain better health. In times of stress, take a mental time-out by using prayer and meditation to calm your mind and relax your body. Get plenty of rest through a good night’s sleep. If you have insomnia or sleep apnea, use meditation techniques to ease your way into sleep or seek treatment from a clinic that specializes in such issues. Each day, eat with good nutrition in mind, even when pressed for time. Finally, incorporate some form of physical exercise into your daily routine—preferably outdoors—so you can circulate fresh air through your lungs and body

Today I will live by this affirmation: My body is a temple. I will keep the spirits outside.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Tis the human touch in this world that counts, the touch of your hand and mine.

~ Spencer Michael Free ~

There once was a girl so afraid of people seeing her sad and lonely that she learned to excel at everything she did. She studied when others were playing so she could get good marks. She practiced sports alone trying to become the best. With all her diligent training, she earned excellent marks and made first-string soft- ball. Her parents thought she was happy and well- adjusted. Yet she was miserable and didn’t know how to say it.

How many of us relate to that girl’s story? We may have learned at an early age not to share our feelings. Some of us became super achievers; some of us became addicted to alcohol or other drugs, food, or sex; some of us became rescuers for addicts. Yet whatever we became, we always made certain no one touched us or came too close.

We may now accept our feelings, acknowledge them, and share them. We may now be able to let another hold our hands or hug us. We know it’s okay to need the human touch.

I can let myself touch and be touched by someone who understands.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being kind

Saying an unkind word to another may not hurt that person the rest of his or her life, but what does it do to us? It separates us from our spiritual fellowship, which we cannot afford.

It is when we are out of step, out of harmony, that we are vulnerable to taking that first fix, drink, or pill. So it will help us all to be kind to others (even to those who don’t seem to appreciate it).

Am I kind to others?

Higher Power, help me show kindness to all my brothers and sisters, even when it is difficult, as you have shown kindness to me.

I will show kindness today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

One must have a good memory to be able to keep the promises one makes.

~ FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE ~

Newcomer

What’s the point of pretending that I’m giving up my drug of choice one day at a time, when I know I have to quit for the rest of my life? Isn’t it hypocritical?

Sponsor

There’s nothing hypocritical about living in the present moment. It’s an old and honored spiritual path. To be fully awake and alive in this day, using our senses to experience what’s going on right now, not avoiding our feelings, not playing games with our minds, is a profound achievement. Living in the future isn’t living; it’s keeping our minds so busy that we can’t be here. The role of our addictions is escape; its opposite is living in the here and now.

At some time, we’ve probably promised ourselves or others that we were never again going to act out our addictions. We weren’t able to keep these promises; in the past, we didn’t know how not to use.

Limiting our focus in recovery to a twenty-four-hour period makes the challenges we face seem more manageable. We can get through twenty-four hours, no matter what. At the end of it, we can rest. It doesn’t mean that we’ll forget all about recovery tomorrow—only that we are willing to live in recovery now.

Today, I commit myself to living this one day of recovery fully.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Remember in Step Nine we were told to make direct amends wherever possible but this generous principle should extend further. We should endeavor to regulate our conduct so as never to intentionally hurt anyone.

Because we don’t drink gives us no license to embarrass our host by telling the other guests what fools they are or what a great guy we are because we quit.

It gives us no right to hold our sobriety as a club over the head of friend wife and make her accede to our every whim on the threat that we will go out and hang one on.

AA gives no new liberties, only new responsibilities.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Thank God for what you have. TRUST GOD for what you need.

2) GIFTS: Getting It From The Steps

3) Formula for failure: try to please everyone.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

As I Think

Higher Power, today with Your help I’ll remember:
As I think, I travel; and as I love, I attract. I am today where my thoughts have brought me, I will be tomorrow where my thoughts take me. I cannot escape the result of my thoughts, but I can endure and learn, I can accept and be glad. I will realize the vision (not the idle wish) of my heart, be it base or beautiful, or a mixture of both; for I will always gravitate toward that which I, secretly, most love. Into my hands will be placed the exact result of my thoughts; I will receive that which I earn, no more, no less. Whatever my present environment may be, I will fall, remain, or rise with my thoughts, my vision, my attitudes. I will become as small as my controlling desire, as great as my dominant aspiration.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

FREEDOM IN FORGIVENESS

If ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you (Matthew 6:14).

Setting others free means setting yourself free, because resentment is really a form of attachment. It is a cosmic truth that it takes two to make a prisoner; a prisoner and a jailer. There is no such thing as being a prisoner on one’s own account. Moreover, the jailer is as much a prisoner as his charge. When you hold resentment against anyone, you are bound to that person by a mental chain. You are tied by a cosmic tie to the thing that you hate. The one person perhaps in the whole world whom you most dislike is the very one whom you are attaching yourself by a hook that is stronger than steel.

Is this what you wish? Is this the condition in which you desire to go on living? Remember, you belong to the thing which you are linked in thought, and at some time or another, if that tie endures, the object of your resentment will be drawn again into your life, perhaps to work further havoc. No one can afford such a thing; and so you must cut all such ties by a clear act of forgiveness. You must lose him and let him go.

By forgiveness you set yourself free; you save your soul. And because the law of love works alike for one and all, you help to save his soul too.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Don’t Stop Now

Before you die, you must allow your genius to walk the wildest unknown way.

~ Bryce Courtenay, author of The Power of One ~

“You will be sleeping in the Ernest Hemingway room,” the desk clerk told me. I cast open the wooden door and found a bedroom decorated exactly as Ernest Hemingway’s might have been. The wrought-iron bed, hurricane lamp, and wooden treasure chest were accented by several of Hemingway’s hardcover texts and some of his actual handwritten correspondence. I peered down the hall to catch glimpses of rooms decorated a la Robert Louis Stephenson, Louisa May Alcott, and my favorite, Dr. Seuss. The Sylvia Beach Hotel3, perched over the rugged beach of Newport, Oregon, is the fruition of a long-time dream by owner Gudrun Cable.

“I yearned to create a space that would honor the great writers and nourish lovers of inspiring words,” Gudi told me over tea in the library late one night. “When this old hotel came up for sale, I went through two years and forty rejected loans before I got funding. I told my friends that if they each decorated a room according to the style of their favorite author, I would trade them a week’s vacation here for five years. When we were ready to open, I put the tiniest ad in the local classifieds, and I expected a few dozen people for the grand opening. Fourteen hundred people showed up that day, along with a triple rainbow. Since that time, business has been amazing, and I have sat in our library and sipped tea and rich conversation with some of the great authors of our time. ”

What dream is calling you? Do you believe in your idea enough to let it come true? In retrospect, Gudi’s rejections seem like a wispy dream in comparison to the joy and success she has found. I can’t wait to get back to Sylvia Beach; perhaps, if my dreams come true, this time I can get the Dr. Seuss room.

Give me the faith to persevere to make my dreams a reality.

I will realize my goals because I believe in myself.

[majestyjo]

February 17

Step by Step

Today, no noises, no regrets, no fears, no shame, no resentments, no anger, no pain, no lying, no cheating, no stealing, no hate. Today, simply BE without the man-generated drama of obstacles and roadblocks. Today, I banish anything and everything negative, just to know and feel what absolute serenity and rest can be. And if I’m successful, I’ll not be just willing but eager to try it again the day after today. Today, I am at peace with myself, with everyone else, with all things. Today, I haven’t got time or need to think about a slip or relapse because, today, I CAN be with absolute serenity and peace. They are offered to me by my Higher Power, if only I take them without the doubts, fears, questions about deserving them. Today, I will claim peace and serenity. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE SECOND PROMISE

We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door upon it.

~ Big Book ~

In the Program, we begin to “clean house” and “get our acts together.” As long as we denied and tried to hide from the world, and ourselves, the truth about what kind of person we were when we were using, there would be no approach to abstinence and little possibility of ever preventing relapse.

Without awareness of what the past did to us, we, even if clean and sober, will find ourselves unable to truly carry the message of hope and the gift of a new lire to those who desperately need it. Relating our past experiences builds a common ground of love and service between us and the ones for whose awakening we have declared ourselves responsible. Because of that honesty, newcomers can come to realize that they are not alone and that they can “make it.”

My past must be visited but never lived in for long.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

There is a basket of fresh bread on your head, and yet you go door to door asking for crusts.

~ Rumi ~

We have often tried to satisfy a deep inner hunger that we could not describe and didn’t understand. We followed the seductive call of sexual pleasures, the allure of alcohol or drugs, the excitement of gambling, or even the satisfactions of being the helpful codependent hero, saving others from their problems. These hollow attractions never satisfied our hunger. No matter how much we tried, they only left us more trapped in a dead-end search and less satisfied than ever.

We find genuine satisfactions for our hunger when we develop self-respect, form caring bonds with friends, develop a relationship with our Higher Power, and follow a path with heart. All of that is available to us and we only need to turn toward it to find it.

Today I seek a real slice of satisfaction in life rather than settling for crumbs.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The child that lives in all of us is always willing to take the blame.

~ Margaret Haigh ~

We sometimes wonder if all women feel as we do. How many times do we apologize for situations that go awry, even those we had no part in? When conflicts erupt, why is it so easy to assume it’s our fault?. When we fear we aren’t adequate as women, It’s a small step to accepting blame for every ripple In a circumstance. We become obsessed with trying to control the uncontrollable, and then we think we’re at fault when we fail.

Mood-altering chemicals appealed to us because they temporarily made us feel good about ourselves. Because we’re human, we don’t always feel good about ourselves. But now we have friends we run talk to in the most intimate way and program tools that can improve our attitude. The longer we’re sober, the more obvious it is that our attitude is the culprit. Changing it changes everything!

I am not to blame for anyone else’s problems today. Accepting blame was a habit. Cultivating a better attitude can be a habit too.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I have found the help I needed

Before getting into recovery, I had little faith and trusted no one (not even myself). I was trying (and failing) to manage two difficult illnesses on my own. Basically, I used chemicals to change my mood and I kept my problems to myself. Finally (predictably), I hit bottom. Finally, I realized how much I needed help.

And I have found help in the Twelve Step fellowship. When I go to my Step meeting, I feel connected; I learn that people will be there for me. When I meet with my sponsor, I feel reassured. I learn that it’s OK to have these problems. I also learn that it’s good to talk about them (because that’s how they get better). Getting help when I need it makes it easier for me to believe that I too have a higher power, one who is quietly and subtly helping me recover. Finally, I am learning trust, and my spirit is growing stronger.

I will meditate on two things that help me feel taken care of, that help me feel secure.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.

~ Victor Borge ~

Laughter lifts our hearts and opens our spirits to one another. Nothing feels quite as good as laughter when it wells up from deep down inside.

In the past maybe we distrusted laughter. Maybe it scared us or we thought it superficial. Or maybe laughter was just another mask we wore — we laughed or joked or teased — anything to avoid a situation that asked for seriousness.

Now we know that laughter, like joy or food or sleep, is essential to our well-being. And like any new behavior, it can be learned.

First we need to notice how we share with others. Are we somber, unyielding, defensive? Or are we open, on the lookout for the best in whomever we may encounter?

We need not remain imprisoned by past attitudes. Just as we now have days when we wake up feeling grateful and glad to be alive, with practice we can channel that gratitude and gladness into our encounters. We have a choice. Happiness and a positive attitude are contagious. The more we smile at the world, the more life seems to smile back.

Today let me be open to smiling and laughing more. Let me expect good things to come to me.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I wish I knew what people mean when they say they find “emptiness” in this wonderful adventure of living…. I’m afraid I’m an incorrigible life-lover and life-wonderer and adventurer.

~ Edith Wharton ~

Being in a recovery program does not mean that you cannot live life to the fullest. Sometimes the greatest achievements, the most beneficial changes, the strongest relationships, and the most learning can take place when you are clean and sober.

In your years of use and abuse, you most likely passively watched wonder, passion, and your sense of adventure disappear. You believed that drinks or drugs would make your life an amazing experience.

Recovery empowers you to try new things, participate in new adventures, or try a different way of acting. You have the chance to step out of old roles you once played and become more solidly positioned in the sheer enjoyment of all that life has to offer. So, today, resolve to include more adventures in your life! Climb a mountain or train for a road race or triathlon. Give back to others by volunteering at a soup kitchen or devoting your time to a worthwhile cause. Explore a career change or learn more about a particular subject. Hone a talent or polish a craft. Pick something you want to do, and then do it!

I am a lover, life-wonderer, and life-adventurer.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We must constantly build d**es of courage to hold back the flood of fear.

~ Martin Luther King, Jr. ~

The definition of courage is the ability to conquer fear or despair. In the past we may have been called courageous because we stayed in circumstances that were difficult or nearly unbearable. We may have felt that walking away from family, children, or friends was cowardly or displayed weakness. We may have felt that by holding back our tears we were stronger people.

Yet all the things we may have viewed as weakness are really signs of courage. All the things we believed to be acts of courage were really not courageous at all. If we walked away from difficult or unbearable circumstances, we would be conquering despair. If we cried, we would have been courageous by letting go of our fear, pain, or sadness.

Courage doesn’t mean putting ourselves in stressful or unpleasant situations. Courage doesn’t mean controlling our emotions. Courage is the ability to strengthen ourselves against the fear and despair of life, rather than be drowned by it.

What have I done today that took courage? I can be grateful for my courage and strengthen it.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Taking care of today

we are today. Idly wishing for the past to be removed or the future to come closer gets us nothing. We must focus on today to make possible a better tomorrow.

This requires a clear understanding of what we can and cannot do today. So let us not distress ourselves by dwelling in the past or future, but express ourselves to the fullest today.

Have I learned to take care of today?

Higher Power guide me in my activities today and keep me from dwelling on the past or the future.

I will take care of today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The road to Hades is easy to travel

~ BION ~

Newcomer

I hear people say, “This is a progressive disease,” and I understand that from my own experience. I did get progressively worse—I had my ups and downs over the years and hit what I now recognize as a bottom. But how can people say that the disease keeps progressing even when we’re in recovery? What does that mean?

Sponsor

Many relapses follow a predictable course: At first, we hang on to the illusion that control is now possible—a little time in recovery has proved that we don’t have to act out our addiction. We think we can behave like “normal” people and “have a little” now and then. It may take only a few hours or days for this illusion to collapse, or it may take weeks or months; most of the stories we hear suggest that the return of active addiction comes quickly. Perhaps our “clean” systems succumb more readily, perhaps our need to anesthetize the guilt of relapsing leads to stepped-up use, or perhaps we’re in rebellion against what we learned in recovery: the “I’ll show them” reaction. The reasons seem less important than the fact that most people who relapse after a period of recovery find that they’ve gotten worse, not better, at handling the addiction. Though there’s no guarantee that someone who has had a relapse will find his or her way back, some do return to recovery and share with us what they’ve learned.

Today, I cherish this chance at recovery, letting go of any need to test it.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The sooner we alcoholics realize the fact that sobriety by itself is not enough to insure real living, the better off we will be.

For us to emerge from our shell and then cease all growth is to stagnate, and stagnation is death itself to an alcoholic. Everything on this planet has a part in the Grand Scheme and unless we discover and act our little part, we are dead, and decay has already set in.

It is contrary to the laws of Nature for man to stand still. We either go ahead or we go back.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) If it wasn’t for denial my life would be ****.

2) Gratitude and acceptance always help, no matter what the circumstances.

3) Your fault—my mistake.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

I Cannot Pray

I cannot pray the Lord’s Prayer and even once say “I.”
I cannot pray the Lord’s Prayer and even once say “my.”
Nor can I pray the Lord’s Prayer and not pray for another,
And when I ask for daily bread, I must include my brother.
For others are included in each and every plea,
From the beginning to the end of it, it does not once say “me.”

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

HOW TO FORGIVE

Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee . . . (Psalm 55:22)

The technique of forgiveness is not very difficult when you understand how. The only thing that is essential is willingness to forgive. Provided you desire to forgive the offender, the greatest part of the work is already done.

The method of forgiving is this: Get by yourself and become quiet. Repeat any prayer that appeals to you, or read a chapter of the Bible. Then quietly say, “I fully and freely forgive X (mentioning the name of the offender); I lose him and let him go. I cast the burden aside. He is free now, and I am free too. The Truth of Christ has set us both free. I thank God.”

On no account repeat this act of forgiveness, because to do it a second time would be tacitly to repudiate your own work. Afterward, whenever the memory of the offender or the offense happens to come into your mind, bless the delinquent briefly and dismiss the thought. Do this, however many times the thought may come back. You will find that all bitterness and resentment have disappeared, and you are both free with the perfect freedom of the children of God. Your forgiveness is complete

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Formative Minutes

Thrice blest whose lives are faithful prayers, whose loves in higher love endures.

~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson ~

A Wonder Bread commercial reminded viewers of the importance of “the formative years”—the first five years of life when a child’s foundation is established. The ad suggested it was important to feed the child Wonder Bread, which “builds strong bodies 12 ways.” The premise of the commercial was correct. The early years of life imprint the important programs upon which a life will be built.

Each day is like a life unto itself, and so the first minutes of each day are the formative minutes. We must take special care to sound the keynote that will set the tone for our entire day. How do you begin your day? Do you spend it with God, in peace, in atonement with yourself? Or do you pop out of bed and immediately dive into the busyness of the day, postponing your soul’s needs in favor of lesser activities?

For many years, I have begun my day with mediation and prayer. Be–fore I speak to anyone, do chores, or even think about work, I sit and commune with Spirit. This practice has empowered my life in such profound ways that I cannot conceive of starting my day in any other way.

Take at least the first 20 minutes of your day to meditate, pray, read an inspiring book, practice yoga or tai chi, walk in the woods, sing, dance, or engage in any practice that links you to a higher power. Establish your center, and the day that follows will reflect clarity, strength, and love. Any time you spend with Spirit will be returned and will multiply many times over. Whenever possible, renew your spirit throughout the day. Even a few seconds of closing your eyes and remembering the presence of love will make a big difference. At the end of your day, be with God before entering sleep. The formative minutes will build the consciousness that makes a productive life.

Be with me today, Spirit. Hold my hand throughout the day, and never let me forget that You walk with me.

I start the day with love, fill the day with love, and end the day with love.

[caressa222]

February 18

Step by Step

Today, LOYALTY as a responsibility to sobriety, the program and everyone who follows it. From them – sobriety, the program and the people who comprise its fellowship – I have been given a gift. But no gift is completely free. To keep it while passing it on requires maintenance – and with maintenance comes loyalty, and respect of that gift. Today, I will be loyal to my sobriety and the steps and principles needed to develop my sobriety by not drinking or using, by answering the call if someone needing help reaches out. Today, I will not engage in the conduct of the character defects I seek to release to my Higher Power. I will act with loyalty and respect to everyone who, like me, has come to the program to work for a rebirth. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE THIRD PROMISE

We will comprehend the word serenity and know peace.

~ Big Book ~

When we read this Promise, we nod our heads eagerly. When we first decided to shake the bondage of addiction through the love, encouragement, deep concern, and help from newfound friends, we knew what serenity felt like. A life of serenity and security comes naturally when we realize that all those who preceded us in our Fellowship have not only had the same problems, but have found solutions which they willingly pass on to us.

Peace of mind is new to us. Serenity becomes refreshing and comfortable as we realize we are free men and women and come to admit to ourselves that we have experienced a miracle.

With that awareness, we find true belief. With abstinence comes mental clarity. Serenity gives us a perfect climate in which spiritual progress can grow.

I am free to seek that precious peace of mind that can mature within me. I live daily with the familiar Serenity Prayer.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

~ Julian of Norwich ~

Some mornings we wake with anxiety, fretting over the future or the state of our lives. Not many things we do will change the direction of events in the future. Our fears for our safety and well-being may be based more on habit than reality, and our desires for control only feed frustration.

To restore calm we can turn to the care of our Higher Power. We do that in our deep meditation, taking a few minutes alone in a quiet, undisturbed, and safe place. We can breathe slowly and deeply, allowing the chair or the floor to hold our body as we allow our Higher Power to hold us. Repeating in our minds today’s opening quote, we find calm settling over us.

Today I accept that all will be well.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The more I force things, the tougher my life.

~ Helen Neujahr ~

Are we driven to control? Perhaps we wonder if trying to control other people is part of the human condition. We’ve probably surrounded ourselves with controlling people, particularly if our friends share our disease. However, not every person alive has to control, and that means we can lessen our stranglehold. But how?

Understanding where our need to control came from is a beginning. Most of us, at least before recovery, were insecure. We wanted to protect ourselves from abandonment, ridicule, physical and emotional harm. The only way we knew to do that was to insist others fulfill our needs. We strengthened, day by day, a trait that hinders us now.

What can save us is acceptance of the first three Steps. Ultimately, we can’t control others, so why try? Turning to our Higher Power can relieve us of our obsession, and that Power, if we’ll let it, will direct our every move. The solution is simple— simple, that is, if we’re not too complicated to follow it!

I don’t need to control anyone today. I am not insecure just as long as I let my Higher Power take charge of my affairs.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am preparing to make amends

It is hard for me to think about facing the people I’ve harmed through my addiction. I imagine that I will suddenly lose the strength to tell them I’m sorry, to tell them I want to make amends. I am afraid they won’t accept me or my offer.

Yet I must try. Because in listening to my fellow members talk about the Steps, I am learning how important it is to be free of the past. I see how releasing myself from guilt is critical to staying sober and stable. I am glad that I have taken my time in working the first eight Steps, because to do Step Nine, I will need all the courage (and all the humility) I can muster.

When I feel strong enough in my dual recovery, I will ask my sponsor for extra support as I begin to make amends to people I have harmed.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

First you make your bed.

~ Joan Ebbitt ~

Active addiction creates total chaos in our lives. Even in early recovery, when drug use or other addictive behavior has ended, chaos still reigns. Living an ordinary life does not come easily when for years we’ve lived otherwise. That’s the bad news: order doesn’t return automatically.

The good news is that order will return and chaos will end with time and effort. One answer to the first question, “Where do I start?” is “First you make your bed.” Literally and figuratively, this is a good place to start. We may not straighten out the whole room, let alone the whole house, but at least the habit of making the bed is the beginning of some kind of order. Something is in place. The rest will follow.

We can start small, and build. With time, effort, and patience, and the help of our Higher Power, who guides us as we grow in confidence, order will return. We’ve already seen it starting to happen.

Today help me bring order to my life. Help me be patient with this process.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I only went out for a walk, and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found, was really going in.

~ John Muir ~

When your mind, body, and spirit are troubled, going out into nature can help you work through some of the difficulties in your life and reconnect with yourself in meaningful ways. Sometimes all you really need to feel better on the inside is to hear the sounds of the great outdoors and breathe in the fresh air.

The best way to begin to connect with nature is to take a slow, meditative walk around your neighborhood. Notice how different the month of February looks from the month of July. Feel the ground beneath your feet. Breathe in deeply and savor the air. Hear the sound your feet make as they connect with the ground. Hear the birds.

Then turn and retrace your steps, watching for things you overlooked the first time. Think or say out loud, “I am one with the sun. I am one with the trees. I am one with the wind. I am one with the birds. I am one with the universe. Because of all these things, I am one with myself in id my Higher Power.”

Today I will connect with nature so I can deepen my spirituality and strengthen my connection to myself.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Be glad you can suffer, be glad you can feel. . . . How can you tell if you’re feeling good unless you’ve felt bad, so you have something to compare it with?

~ Thomas Tryon ~

How many times have we come home at the end of a day ranting and raving about how horrible the day was? Or perhaps our spouse, lover, roommate, or child has carried home the burden of a bad day. How can we feel good when the day has felt so bad?

First, we have to change our way of thinking. We need to apply the old saying “opposites attract” to those times of stress and unhappiness. We wouldn’t know how to smile if we didn’t know how to frown. We wouldn’t know how to cry if we didn’t know how to laugh. We wouldn’t even know when we were sick if we didn’t already know what it feels like to be well.

By knowing how things feel—both the good and the bad—we can be more aware of ourselves. If today was bad, it’s okay to let it go now and know there will be days that will be good.

Higher Power, help me to let go of the bad feelings of the day. Help me to feel grateful for today, no matter how it has been.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Praying by acting

There is more to prayer than just kneeling at night and folding our hands. Thoughts of love can be prayers. Feelings of gratitude can be prayers. Prayers can be seen in a smile, a gesture, and even an action not done.

Joy surging through our bodies is a prayer. Caring for a child is a form of prayer. Many times, no matter what the position of our bodies, our soul is on its knees.

Do I express prayer in all that I do?

Higher Power, help me pray throughout the day, knowing that your goodness abounds in me.

Today I will make prayers of my actions by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Body and Spirit are twins.

~ ALGERNON SWINBURNE ~

Newcomer

I want to be responsible, and I’m trying to clear up the paperwork and phone calls I’m behind in, and the messes I’ve made. But I can hardly sit still. I start feeling a sensation of pressure in my chest and throat. I worry that I could be having a heart attack.

Sponsor

When I first entered recovery, I didn’t realize what a profound impact the substances I’d been using had had on my central nervous system. Cleansing my body of their effects, rebuilding my strength, and restoring balance took time. I was anxious all the time, and my nerves were shot. For me, a checkup by a medical professional familiar with the effects of addiction was reassuring and informative. In my case—and this was just for me—I needed nutritional supplements and regular exercise. But I still felt scared and sad a lot of the time.

Feelings are a part of life. We don’t have to “fix” them; they’re just feelings. They pass through us without harming us, if we let them. As we go through the work of early recovery, it’s not unusual for intense emotions to arise. They seem to flow more easily when we share them with others. If chores seem daunting, we can work on them a little bit at a time. It’s okay to ask for help.

My body, mind, and spirit are going through huge changes as I recover. Today, I share my feelings. I request and accept help.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The Program is often referred to as a Selfish Program and it is primarily that. Jesus of Nazareth told us to “Love our neighbors AS ourselves.” We are supposed to love ourselves, and in so doing we should give to ourselves all the happiness we can. We have found out, however, by practical application, that we can only receive happiness if we give happiness.

We should fulfill all our duties to our families, to our communities, and to our neighbors so that we can keep in the good graces of our own conscience for that is the only avenue of approach to happiness and peace of mind.

If you really love that guy in the mirror, you must of necessity love your Creator and your neighbor.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Feel good about yourself by serving others.

2) The more you have on the inside, the less you need on the outside.

3) GMC: God Made Coincidences

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Lead Me and Guide Me

Almighty God, I humbly pray,
Lead me and guide me through this day.
Cast out my selfishness and sin,
Open my heart to let You in.
Help me now as I blindly stray
Over the pitfalls along the way.
Let me have courage to face each task,
Invest me with patience and love, I ask.
Care for me through each hour today,
Strengthen and guard me now, I pray.

As I forgive, forgive me too,
Needing Your mercy as I do.
Oh, give me Your loving care,
Never abandon me to despair.
Yesterday’s wrongs I would seek to right,
Make me more perfect in Your sight.
Oh, teach me to live as best I can,
Use me to help my fellowman.
Save me from acts of bitter shame,
I humbly ask it in Your name.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION

Lead us not into temptation; but deliver us from evil (Matthew 6:13).

Many earnest people feel that God could not lead anyone into temptation in any circumstances, and that Jesus could not have said what he is represented to have said, and so some other phrasing is sought more in accordance with the general tone of his teaching. All this, however, is unnecessary.

The facts are these—the more you pray, the more sensitive you become, and the more powerful are your prayers. Buy you also become susceptible to forms of temptation that simply do not beset those at an earlier stage. Subtle and powerful temptations await; temptations to work for self-glory, for personal distinction; temptation to personal preferences other than perfect impartiality. Beyond all other temptations the deadly sin of spiritual pride. Many who have surmounted all the other testings have lapsed into self-righteousness that has fallen like a curtain of steel between them and God.

Some old writers were so vividly sensible of these dangers that they have spoken of the soul as being challenged by various tests as it traversed the upward road. The traveler was halted at various turnpike bars, and tested by some ordeal to determine whether he were ready to advance any further. If he succeeded in passing the test he was allowed to continue upon his way with the blessings of the challenger.

Now, some less experienced souls, eager for rapid advancement, have rashly desired to be subjected immediately to all kinds of tests, and have even looked about, seeking for difficulties to overcome. Forgetting our Lord’s injunction,

Thou Shalt not tempt the Lord thy God (Matthew 4:7),

They have virtually challenged him to give them difficulties. And so Jesus has inserted this clause, in which we pray that we may not have to meet anything that is too much for us at the present level of our understanding.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Supposed to Stink

You desire to know the art of living, my friend?…
Make use of suffering.

~ Henri F. Amiel ~

As I lifted the lid off my compost container, my nose was assaulted by the acrid aroma of rotting food. “Argh!” I recoiled, “That really stinks!” Then an inner voice reminded me, “It’s supposed to stink.” Of course it is. If rotten food wasn’t repulsive, we might eat it and get sick. The obnoxious smell is nature’s way of keeping us away from what would hurt us.

In life, too, nature tries to repulse us from what would hurt us. Whenever we experience pain, conflict, antagonism, or frustration, the universe is, in effect, sending us the message, ‘This is not the way you are supposed to be doing it. Try another way.”

Stubborn as we humans can be, we sometimes put up with rotten smells for a long time for all the wrong reasons. Many of us tolerate dysfunctional relationships, addictive behaviors, abusive business situations, and noxious health conditions that undermine us every time we participate in them. We convince ourselves that it is noble to put up with pain, or “one day he will change,” or “next week I will talk to my boss.” Meanwhile, we deny the message the universe is trying to communicate: Do it differently so you can be happy and healthy.

If a rat learns to maneuver through a maze to get to some cheese, and then the cheese is taken away, the rat will go through the maze a few more times, but soon it realizes that there is no further reward in the journey. Unlike the rat, we may go down a dead-end maze many times, still hoping that somehow the cheese will be there. The real cheese lies in honoring ourselves to live in the light. We must tell the truth about our pain so we can extricate ourselves from it. There is a better way. Love yourself enough to claim it.

Speak to me so clearly that I fully recognize the message You are sending.

I claim my right to live in light without pain.

[majestyjo]

February 19

Step by Step

Today, begin the process of reconciling emotional, spiritual and mental defects to the program – even if I am not either willing or able yet to hand them off to my higher power. Reconciliation, needed so I see that I must let go of what holds me back, requires that I understand that recovery is more than not drinking and requires a fundamental change in my entire character. And abstinence alone, were it that easy, cannot achieve that change. It requires a brutally honest Fourth to find my defects and a 10th to understand why and how they impede what I could be in sobriety – but am not yet. In reconciling myself to my defects of character, I may finally be able to say they have no purpose in where I hope to go in recovery, that they harbor a hidden spark to ignite a slip or relapse and, more important, that I want to be done with them once and for all. If the defects I found in the Fourth remain in my 10th and I know it is time to let them go, today, I seek the courage to change what I can – myself. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE FOURTH PROMISE

No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.

~ Big Book ~

What excitement comes to us when we discover that we are not useless human beings! When we drank or used, we thought we were doomed to be incompetent, unworthy, and useless persons. No more!

Our escape from the depths of despair makes us feel needed and trusted. Others listen to our stories of how we were, what happened, and what we are today. They cry out, “That’s me. I was that way. I did all those same things.”

We come to know we deserve that trust, that companionship, that acceptance. We are worthy human beings. We can help others experience miracles. When we tell of our degrading existence with alcohol and drugs, we are useful and important to those who listen. Our negative experiences become positive forces in helping others find the road to recovery.

Recovery brings me the realization that I can become a helpful person by sharing those very experiences that made me feel worthless.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Take your work seriously but yourself lightly.

~ C. W. Metcalf ~

As we found comfort in our addiction and codependency, we created great problems and chaos in our lives. We come into recovery with a sense of relief that we are no longer living from crisis to crisis, but we still have to deal with our persistent longing for control and security. Many of us get drawn into the same search for comfort by overindulging in work. Work can become another addictive escape from developing as spiritual men with deep emotional lives.

Perhaps a long-standing insecurity about our place at work keeps us working longer hours than necessary, taking few vacations, or even working seven days a week. Perhaps a deep feeling of guilt and shame drives us into unending work, as if we could redeem ourselves by working harder and longer. No matter how virtuous or successful we are at work, it will only cover these underlying fears, never resolve them. Only by facing our insecurities and guilts directly will we ever grow spiritually.

Today I will take time to play, to spend time in my relationships, and perhaps just to loaf.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I have come to realize that all of my fears are false gods before me.

~ Mary Casey ~

Some days are free of fear: they flow smoothly with not a single "tremor." What's different on those days? Without realizing it, we probably left God's work to God. Fears generally surface when we get too personally invested in the outcomes of situations and in the actions of people we care about. We get confused and think our well-being is dependent on them and what they do rather than on God.

Fear about anything is the same as denying God's presence in our lives. It's not easy to shake the fear from our minds once we have given in to it, but we can if we follow the suggestions of this program. Most of us have come to believe in a Higher Power. Remembering to rely on that Power, letting it take charge of our lives and will, is our most positive option.

Any fear I have today is of my choosing. Dwelling on God rather than on the fear will change every experience I have today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I have some liabilities and weaknesses

I am valuable and lovable. I have much to offer. But as a person in recovery from addiction and psychiatric illness, I am figuring out that some aspects of my personality need work.

To learn which parts need work, I must examine how I think and how I behave. It will help if I take a careful look at how I make it harder for myself to recover—that is, if I look at my liabilities and weaknesses. It is not easy or pleasant to face these parts of me, let alone consider changing them. But recovery—in other words, slowly making changes in my life— is the most important work I need to do right now.

I will write down two ways I think, or two ways I behave, that can make it harder for me to stay in recovery.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

It is impossible to feel grateful and depressed in the same moment.

~ Naomi Williams ~

Thank you, thank you, thank you! There never seem to be enough thank yous to express the gratitude we feel in our hearts.

The miracle of our recovery is a source of continuing appreciation and thankfulness. How lucky we are to have been chosen to receive the gifts of sobriety and abstinence.

We may feel especially grateful to be witnessing the miracles of change in the lives of others who work the Twelve Steps of recovery. What a privilege to watch another move from despair to hope and serenity. Again and again we see others get better, sober up, and help still others get sober.

We are all part of a healing chain that stretches around the world, from hand to hand and heart to heart. Gratitude is the glue. It wells up inside us and shines out to others as a candle of hope and possibility.

Today let me accept and express gratitude as the basic fuel of my recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

From what we get, we can make a living; what we give, however, makes a life.

~ Arthur Ashe ~

Did you ever consider that you can effect positive change in others? Because you are in a program of recovery, you have firsthand knowledge about the dangers and downfalls of drugs and alcohol. Because you admitted you were powerless over your addiction, you have an en-lightening experience to share with those still trapped in lives focused on drinking and drugging. Your story can be inspirational and eye-opening to others.

You have much to contribute to your community, charities, churches, and to others in recovery. Volunteer work—whether at your favorite meetings, in local organizations, or in more far-reaching causes—can strengthen your recovery as it provides hope and help to others.

Start by volunteering to make coffee at a meeting or clean up afterward. As you grow and strengthen in recovery, volunteer to speak at a local high school on the topic of recovery, deliver lunches and dinners to those who are homebound, or read stories to children at your local library. When you see yourself as a valuable resource with much to contribute for the good of others, you may be pleasantly surprised at the energy, compassion, and expertise you have to give.

Today I am ready to extend a helping hand to others.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Reputation is what you have when you come to a new community; character is what you have when you go away.

~ William Hersey Davis ~

All of us in the program have a reputation. We are the children or spouses of alcoholics, or are alcoholics or addicts ourselves. But even though we may introduce ourselves at meetings by our reputations, that in no way reflects upon our character—who we are as people.

As people begin to know us, they learn how we think, what we feel, why we do what we do, what we like or dislike. These things make up character. When we refer to someone as "quite a character," we are referring to a unique personality, a person who stands taller than a reputation.

Do we show others our reputation or our character? Sometimes it's easier to hide behind the walls of a reputation by being snobbish, silent, or sarcastic. Yet it's our character that is far more important. Our character allows us to be who we are and lets us show how we feel. Reputation can make someone look at us, but character can make someone look twice and notice us.

How can I show my character instead of my reputation?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Practicing HALT

The acronym HALT means never get too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, or too Tired. Each of these conditions can fog our minds so that we lose sight of our purpose—abstinence and recovery—and have a slip.

If we can become more aware of our thoughts and feelings, we will avoid some pain and some slips, HALT is a good slogan to keep in mind.

Do I practice HALT?

Higher Power, help me slow down and become more self-aware.

Today when I feel myself getting hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, I will

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Faith needs her daily bread.

~ DINAH CRAIK ~

Newcomer

I still don't feel very serene when I wake up in the morning. I start worrying as soon as I'm awake, usually about someone I'm afraid of or have a resentment against. I guess I'm having trouble staying in the present.

Sponsor

You're not alone in what you're experiencing. Some of us describe morning anxiety as "the committee in my head" or "the disease." I've heard people in early recovery say, "My disease gets up before I do; it's already sitting at the foot of my bed when I open my eyes."

Some of us make a program phone call first thing in the morning; even a few minutes' talk with another recovering person can help put our morning fears in perspective and help us face the day with lightness. This works both ways: both the caller and the person called are nourished by the contact.

While we're still in bed, we can gently stretch our bodies any way that feels comfortable, then take several slow, deep, complete breaths. We can begin our day by reading and meditating on a page of program literature or other spiritual literature that appeals to us. And we can spend a few moments in prayer. For many years now, I've begun my day offering thanks for the day and for all the days that have led to it. I turn over anything that worries me, affirming that my Higher Power will show me how to handle whatever the day offers.

Today, I center myself in prayer.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The AA way of living holds out, for all that will grasp it, everything that is advantageous to life. A healthy mind, a healthy body, a healthy soul. Complete harmony with God, your fellow man and yourself. Truly the peace that passeth all understanding.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Universal Prayer

Eternal Reality,
You are everywhere.
You are infinite unity, truth, and love;
You permeate our souls,
Every corner of the universe, and beyond.

To some of us, You are father, friend, or partner.
To others, Higher Power, Higher Self, or Inner Self.
To many of us, You are all these and more.
You are within us and we within You.

We know You forgive our trespasses
If we forgive ourselves and others.
We know You protect us from destructive temptation
If we continue to seek Your help and guidance.
We know You provide us food and shelter today
If we but place our trust in You and try to do our best.
Give us this day knowledge of Your will for us and
the power to carry it out.
For Yours, is infinite power and love,
Forever.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THINE THE GLORY

Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever and ever (Matthew 6:13).

This is a wonderful gnomic saying summing up the essential truth of the Omnipresence and the Allness of God.

We know that God is the only power, and so, when we work it is really God working by means of us. Just as the pianist produces his music by means of, or through his fingers, so may mankind be thought of as the fingers of God. His is the Power. If, when you have anything to do, you hold the thought, “Divine Intelligence is working through me now,” you will perform the most difficult tasks.

The wondrous change that comes over us as we gradually realize what the Omnipresence of God really means, transfigures every phrase of our lives, turning sorrow into joy, age into youth, and dullness into the light and life. This is the glory!

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

How Big Is Your Basket?

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of Lights.

~ James 1:17 ~

While I was leading a group meditation, I had a mystical vision. Above the group, I saw a vast reservoir of golden light, as if there was no ceiling on the room. I beheld an infinite heaven beaming down a luminous rain of blessings upon the group. Then I saw each person in the room sitting with a basket in their lap, catching the gifts of light from above. Each basket was a different size; some were small, and others were large. Although an infinite volume of blessings was streaming down, each person was able to catch gifts in accordance with the size of their basket. Those with large baskets caught many blessings, while those with small baskets caught only some.

A great reservoir of abundance is offered to each of us; how much we shall enjoy it is determined by how much we are open to receive. The gifts of God are like a vast immeasurable ocean. You can go to the ocean with a thimble, a cup, a bucket, or a tanker, and you will come away with a volume of gifts relative to the size of the vessel you bring.

How big is your basket? Are you allowing all the good that is offered you to be manifested? You may have a huge tank of water with which to water your garden, but if you’re standing on the hose, you will see only a small dribble.

Get off the hose by saying “yes” to good when it comes. Find a way to turn negative experiences into gifts, and you will discover that they are good. Practice increasing your receptivity, and you will prove that our Source is infinite.

Help me deepen my receptivity to Your love. I pray to be open to all You give.

I am open to receiving the fullest abundance that life has to offer.

[caressa222]

February 20

Step by Step

Today, in these 24 Hours put aside MY wants and hear the cry of someone whose need is greater, whose anguish cuts deeper and whose fears are more haunting than mine. My prayers and hopes will be for THAT person because HIS needs might, just might, be more important than mine. And in trying to put myself aside in favor of someone else this day, pray that I might experience a fundamental change, a change toward compassion, empathy and selflessness. But in achieving that, my motive hasn’t really been altogether selfless – I may have progressed to my first or another spiritual awakening by attaining humility in the knowledge that my own fears, insecurities and problems probably are not as heavy as someone else’s. Today, someone whose burdens are heavier than mine will have my prayers. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE FIFTH PROMISE

The feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.

~ Big Book ~

When we were deep within the bewilderment and agony of our addiction, we often moaned, “What’s the use? Nobody cares.” We considered ourselves “lost people.” We thought we were incapable of ever doing anything worthwhile for anyone, including ourselves. Shame and guilt made us wallow in self-pity, but we never blamed ourselves. It was always those people, places, and things out there that made us victims.

We complained, “They did it to me. I’m not to blame. If it hadn’t been for bad luck…. I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

In recovery, we often refer to self-pity as the PLOMs (“poor little old me”). We learn to recognize and avoid the PLOMs by working our Program and by focusing on positive things.

When I surrendered to my addiction, I was always sure I had been betrayed by others. I was sorry for myself. Now the promise has come true. I am useful and free of self-pity.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aids, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn.

~ Henry David Thoreau ~

The wisdom of hope in the face of trouble is a fundamental principle of the spiritual path. We expect to have problems, and we have already come through many of them. Our hopes aren’t dashed by them. Our awakening in the spiritual life means that even in the darkest night, we can have an infinite expectation that dawn always comes. We have problems, we respond to them, and things get better.

Our spirituality shows us how to have serenity in the face of risk. We accept the darkness because it is inevitable, but we are not defeated by it. We rise above it with our trust in our Higher Power to lead us toward the inevitable light.

Today my awakening means I trust in a Higher Power to lead me to a better future.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

A woman who maintains fitness in her life has earned a Ph.D. in self-esteem.

~ Anne Marie Nelson ~

The word fitness covers a lot of ground. It’s related not only to how we take care of our bodies, but also to how we eat, think, behave, plan for the day ahead, and pray. Every avenue of our lives is either fit or it isn’t.

Our Twelve Step program can serve as our manual for fitness. For some of us, the decision to exercise and eat right is an easy one. Decisions about how we think and how we behave, however, may be more difficult and require more discipline. Fortunately, the Fourth and Tenth Steps keep us in touch with our individual characteristics. We can make conscious choices about which ones to exercise in every situation.

My fitness today is within my grasp. The Steps will anchor me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I continue to benefit from treatment

I couldn’t stop worrying. I couldn’t relax. I could hardly get out of the house at times. I was stuck in a pattern, feeling anxious and fearful, and using alcohol to feel better (although it was not much help).

But what did help me to get unstuck and feel better was going through treatment. Once I learned about my emotional and substance abuse problems, my anxiety diminished and I was able to stop using alcohol. These days I am starting to do things differently and to do different things. I even take a (healthy) risk now and then. The freedom of choice is a great relief.

I will meditate on the changes in my life and the expanding options that have come about through treatment.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The highest possible stage in moral culture is when we recognize that we ought to control our thoughts.

~ Charles Darwin ~

What rules us? Possessions? Passions? Mistakes? Early in recovery, we may have been surprised to discover just how much these things rule us.

Maybe we criticize ourselves mercilessly, unable to forgive ourselves for the smallest error. Maybe we’re people pleasers or slaves to perfection, and feel worthless when we fall short of another’s expectations or fail to work the perfect program of recovery. Some of us, now financially stable, have become slaves to things, wanting and acquiring until we find ourselves again on debt’s doorstep, or maybe we’ve become rigid with self-discipline, unable to loosen up and enjoy life.

The demons of self-doubt, self-criticism, fear, and rigidity all show their faces early in recovery. Struggling with them is part of the process of change. The struggle doesn’t mean we’re not making progress or that we’re slipping back into old ways, but that we’re facing our problems and taking responsibility for our lives.

We can learn from these struggles. Asking ourselves, “Who owns me today?” can give us the best answer of all: “Just me.”

Today help me learn to find and keep my freedom. Help me be my own self.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

People are like stained-glass windows. They glow and sparkle when the sun is shining on them. But, if the sun goes down, their true beauty is revealed only if they have a light from within.

~ Anonymous ~

A Native American ceremony used for spiritual renewal in the winter months, when darkness comes early, encouraged the return of the sun through connection with the Great Spirit.

At night, to the steady beat of drums, the tribe would gather in a circle around a fire. One at a time, members would sing, chat, or speak of a wish for the future, a desire for the present, or a memory from the past. Each member would toss into the fire an object created for the ceremony.

The voices of the tribe would join in as the object burned and the speaker prayed, asking what needed to be done to make a dream come true, what new strengths could be developed to let go of a past memory, and what could be done in the present to reach a desire. When all members had taken a turn in the ceremony, the tribe would unite in a dance to the beat of the drums.

I trust that there is a light within me. Today I will pray to my Higher Power to release the darkness and replenish this light.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The strength you’ve insisted on assigning to others is actually within yourself.

~ Lisa Alther ~

If we think right now about people we admire and respect, we’ll usually find that their enviable qualities involve a certain degree of strength. So we admire these people, wishing we, too, could be as strong as they are.

Yet each of us has inner strength. This strength defines us as we are and makes us different. We cannot share the same amount of strength in all areas of our life—mental, physical, and spiritual—because we are all different.

Let us think back over the events of today and find our inner strengths. We may work well with people; we may be a good employee or student. As we look around our homes, we may find further clues—handiwork, a tasty meal, flourishing plants, a set of weights, a shelf full of books, a completed crossword puzzle. If we spend less time envying another’s strengths and look instead to ourselves, we will have more time and energy to develop our own inner strengths.

What are my inner strengths? How can I make them even stronger?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Having realistic expectations

Sometimes we expect much too much of people and things. We will never be happy if we expect our doctor to work instant cures or if we blame our teacher for what we failed to learn. We need to examine what’s realistic to expect of others and what we are responsible for ourselves. It’s the same with the program: We cannot judge its effectiveness by whether we are happy all the time.

The program will be perfect only when we are perfect. We must let go of our childish all-or-nothing attitude and become more realistic. After all, when were we ever happy all the time?

Do I expect too much?

Higher Power, when I am unhappy with the program, help me be honest with myself about where the problem lies.

Today I will examine my expectations about

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

There are moments when everything goes well; don’t be frightened, it won’t last.

~ JULES RENARD ~

Newcomer

Yesterday, I had a pretty good day. I woke up feeling rested after a night’s sleep. The weather was just the way I like it. I enjoyed the food I ate. I finished the work I was supposed to do. I went to a meeting and was asked to share. It was a little bit like being in love—with recovery! Today, nothing is going my way. I woke up late. I feel rushed and pressured. This weather depresses me. A good friend misunderstood everything I said. I showed up at a meeting, and nobody even said hello.

Sponsor

When I was active in my addiction, dramatic highs and lows were the pattern of my life. I needed my drug of choice to manage my moods. Even without it, I may continue to experience mood swings. Recovery doesn’t happen in a day, a week, a period of months; it’s a gradual, ongoing process. Just as consistent rest and good nutrition restore my body to health and balance over time, consistent use of the tools of the program helps put me on an even keel mentally and spiritually. As I maintain new, sober habits, the off days have less power to throw me. Sometimes I even remember to laugh at myself or to reach out and help another human being. We choose not to take self-prescribed mood changers today; cultivating a sense of humor and helping out at meetings are among the “legal” mood changers that work, when we remember to use them.

Today, I don’t expect to have it made. I accept the unique challenges of this day as if they were gifts. I am consistent in using the tools of recovery I’ve been given, no matter what.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

So many times we hear people say, “Don’t preach to me about God. He has no time for the likes of me.” It is hard for us alcoholics to conceive of a God, whom we have gone out of our way to alienate, who has time for the likes of us—yet we know that he does have time for us and has demonstrated this fact in hundreds of cases, just as though He had nothing else in the world to do.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Every alcoholic’s favorite brand: More!

2) Forgiveness of others is a gift to yourself.

3) The more you have, the more you want.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Reliance on God

O Higher Power,
Never let me think
that I can stand by myself,
and not need You.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

WITH ALL SAILS SET

God intended us to have dominion over our lives, to be the captains of our souls.

Of course, in the ship of life, you cannot make port unless all sails are set. You must pursue the spiritual life wholeheartedly. You cannot expect to reach port if you are faithful in prayer and meditations for a time, and then for a time you forget God.
You are the captain of your soul when you can say with Jesus,

I and my Father are one (John 10:30).

. . . the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works (John 14:10).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Homey Don’t Play That

It’s a funny thing about life; if you accept anything but the very best, you will get it.

~ W. Somerset Maugham ~

The hit television show In Living Color featured an endearing clown named Homey who refused to do anything that would make him look silly. When the kids in Homey’s audience asked him, “When will your baggy pants fall down?” Homey made a sour face and told them bluntly, “Homey don’t play that.” When the youngsters beseeched him, “Let’s see you slip on the banana peel, Homey!” he tartly declared, “I don’t think so.”

Homey unknowingly taught a supremely important metaphysical principle: We never need to demean ourselves to be socially acceptable; it is not necessary to give other people pleasure at our expense. When friends, co-workers, or authority figures ask us to violate our integrity or peace, we cannot afford to dishonor our spirit.

Every challenge is an opportunity to choose our identity If you do not know your worth, you will accept and stay in conditions that deny the light you are and the happiness you deserve. If you remember that you deserve only love, you will accept the good that comes to you and categorically reject all else. The next time you are asked to make yourself small, remember that “Homey Don’t Play That.”

Help me honor what You created me to be.

Established in peace, I live to my full potential.

[caressa222]

February 21

Step by Step

Today: “Keep It Sweet and Simple!” In the end, the complexities and sometimes grueling work of the Twelve Steps come down to a cardinal action: if I do not want to deal with the shakes through the day and the oblivion of drunkenness; if I do not want to deal with guilt, remorse, shame and self-degradation; if I do not want the numbing pain of letting down myself and anyone who has stood with me through the worst of my drinking days and the best of my recovery; if I do not want to devote any part of the day and night with my head in a toilet throwing up and with the dry heaves; if I don’t want to take bed sheets to the laundromat for an unplanned wash because they got soaked by my own vomit; if I don’t want to risk getting nailed for drunk driving and the subsequent court-ordered fines and fees, alcohol classes and triple car insurance rates; if I want to continue to progress in recovery and sobriety; if I want to nurture the re-established relationships that were previously broken and responsibilities that went neglected because of drinking; if I want to keep clear of self-pity, anger, confusion, and anguish; if I want to claim honestly that I am sober today; today, I won’t drink. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE SIXTH PROMISE

We shall lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.

~ Big Book ~

We came into the Program as experts in dishonesty, deceit, envy, and self-pity. Selfishness was an emotion that fitted us well. We were shameless in the ways we found useful in taking advantage of other people. The victims of our selfishness most often were those who loved us and tried to help us.

Our self-importance was based on unreality and was the effect of addicted behaviour. We engaged in far out thinking that reached the heights of fantasy. Our selfishness and self-centeredness developed within all of us a sick ego that turned into a powerhouse of grandiosity. The arrogance of an ego-driven addict was a drawback to willingness. In such a state of being, only miracles could help us.

In my addiction, my selfishness made me a “me first” person. In recovery, I am interested in the well-being of others. This has caused my self-interest to disappear.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

~ William Arthur Ward ~

We could never have arrived at this point in our lives without the help of a lot of other people. It has been said that we stand on the shoulders of all those who have gone before us. But we also benefited from many people in our lives who were kind, who believed in us when we didn’t believe very strongly in ourselves—and from the anonymous multitude of men and women who shone a light on the path to recovery. Sometimes we know within our hearts that someone made a big difference to us, but it is hard to admit it to that person. We may even develop a grudging attitude toward people who have helped us because we are stingy about giving them any credit.

The surprising thing about gratitude is that the more we express it, the larger it grows. As grown men, we all have a mountain of things and people to be thankful for. If we don’t express gratitude, our withholding diminishes us. The more we say it and give it away, the bigger and stronger we feel.

Today I will thank someone who has helped me.

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Practiced consistently, new habits become who I am.

~ Lin Andrukat ~

We sometimes have trouble defining ourselves. Anyone who spends much time in our presence, however, can define us pretty accurately. Our habits tell our “story” quite readily.

Many of our behaviors embarrass us, yet we repeat them. But changing them takes more than wishing they’d disappear. It takes a decision not to repeat them and the thoughtfulness to find a replacement for them. We return to old behaviors more out of laziness than intent.

Those of us in a Twelve Step program have the tools to make this shift in our behavior easier. Doing a Fourth Step to look at the past, and frequent Tenth Steps to stay on top of today, gives us the insight to define who we are and who we’d rather be. Changing who we are isn’t that difficult if we have the desire.

Any current behavior used to be “new.” It became a habit only with continuous use. I can decide to begin a new behavior today.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need time to change

Getting into recovery, it was hard enough to admit my emotional illness and my addiction to chemicals. For some time after, I could hardly see my character defects, let alone admit to them.

Having done a Fourth, Fifth, and Sixth Step, I feel willing—no, eager—to let go of my shortcomings. But as much as I want to change now, I can’t just say “Change!” and be changed. My addiction has taught me that change requires time, patience, and the help of my higher power. As I continue to work the program, I need to be aware of my shortcomings and allow them to be removed by my higher power when the time is right.

Today I will pray for patience and self-acceptance.

***********************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The mental obsession begins to interfere with one’s work, home life, social activities, and spirituality.

~ Joan Ebbitt ~

One of addiction’s most destructive aspects is the binge, whether it be with alcohol, other drugs, food, sex, or gambling.

A lot of times we’ll swear it’s the last one, but it never is. A day or two or a week or two later we binge again. It satisfies a deep need that willpower alone cannot appease, and announces to any who would hear that this is an addiction. If we add up the binges we can see the disease process. Over years and years and years.

The next time these feelings start, we can call our sponsor, go to a meeting, and talk about how it feels. Reaching out enables us to move through feelings without bingeing. It’s not an easy thing to talk about, but the relief we get once the urge has passed makes it all worth it. For that we can be grateful.

Today let me use the tools I’ve acquired to avoid a binge.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.

~ Conan O’Brien ~

It has been said, “The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man’s observation, not overturning it.” In fact, the word dialogue means talking between two sides. A dialogue includes an exchange of thoughts, opinions, and feelings. It means expressing yourself but also hearing what others have to say. It means opening your mind and absorbing the words of others.

Thinking only of your pleasure, considering only your own needs, and talking over the conversations of others are not components of good communication. Freedom of speech does not give you the license to say anything you want whenever you want, just because you feel like it. Communication with others requires responsible use.

One of the most important tools in recovery is listening—not just to others, but also to your Higher Power. It means opening both your ears and your heart to under-stand what others are going through. It means listening with attentiveness rather than framing what you are going to say. It means letting someone speak fully, without interruption. And it means communicating through prayer— but then listening to the guidance of your Higher Power.

Today I will think and listen before I speak.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The twilight, in fact, had several stages, and several times after it had grown dusky, acquired a new transparency, and the trees on the hillsides were lit up again.

~ Henry David Thoreau ~

There are small candles of light we can bring into our lives to take away some of the darkness. These are the candles of the program—soft, warm lights given to us each time we open our faith and trust to the fellowship.

There is the candle we can take home from a meeting, kindled by the caring and sharing of those around us. There is the candle given to us by our sponsors and friends, which burns brighter each time we ask for help. And there is the candle given to us by our Higher Power—an eternal light reflecting strength, hope, and salvation.

It’s true that it’s darkest before the dawn, but we have countless candles to brighten our night.

How can these candles help me through the night?

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Becoming free

Many of us have said, “I want the freedom to be who I am.” Do we realize, however, that our freedom is only as broad as the freedom we grant others? The more we let someone else be who he or she is, the more freedom we have to be ourselves.

Other people—people who are different from us—are mirrors for us. They can help us see what we’re doing well or poorly; but more than that, they can be models for us and show us the way.

Am I becoming free?

Higher Power, help me learn the valuable lessons of diversity.

I will work on freedom today by acknowledging the differences between myself and (name two people)

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Living entirely turned in on oneself is like trying to play on a violin with slackened strings.

~ JACQUES LUSSEYRAN ~

Newcomer

I went to a meeting today feeling angry, rebellious, and bored. I hated sitting there, and I hardly listened. It was the round-robin kind of meeting where the discussion goes from person to person: you get to share without raising your hand. When it was my turn, I said how resentful and different I felt, how I hated everything about the program and didn’t think it could help me. People nodded, some laughed, and the speaker said, “We’ve all been there.” I felt relieved. Often, I don’t start feeling okay until almost the end of a meeting. I wish I didn’t have to keep going through this.

Sponsor

As an addicted person, I have a special talent for letting negative thoughts and feelings take over. It’s as if my mind were a balloon filled with heavy, dark stuff; left to my own devices, I keep blowing it bigger, filling it with more of the same. It takes another person, someone who lives outside of my mind, to prick the balloon and let my tired old thoughts escape. Suddenly, reality looks completely different. That’s one reason to get to some small meetings where we’re more likely to have a chance to share. And it’s always a good idea to stay through a whole meeting; in an hour, things can change! I’ve noticed that even when I share my most unacceptable feelings, people in recovery don’t reject me; when I tell the worst about myself; they listen and laugh. I love the laughter in meetings; it reminds me of how lucky we are to be alive again.

Today, it’s safe for me to risk getting close to other human beings by sharing honestly.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The effectiveness of AA is largely built upon understanding and human sympathy. These characteristics were not acquired from a book but learned the hard way as we, too, traveled the long dark alley of despair in search of a helping hand and an understanding heart.

Creeds and ideologies are for preachers and students to debate and reason, but our doctrine of love and understanding has nothing to do with reason; frequently it is contrary to reason, as it comes from the heart and not the head.

************************************************

~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) GOD: Get Out Devil

2) How you respond is your responsibility.

3) Whatever you are trying to avoid, we won’t go away until you confront it.

************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Sailor’s Prayer

Dear God, be good to me. The sea is so wide, and my boat is so small.

***********************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

QUARANTINE YOUR TROUBLES

When you are praying or “treating” about a particular thing, you should handle it, mentally, very carefully indeed. The ideal way is not to think about it at all except when you are actually praying about it. Moreover, to talk to the other people about it is exceedingly likely to invite failure.

When a new problem presents itself to you, decline to consider it except in the light of Truth. I call this “putting a subject in quarantine.” Even an old long-standing problem can be “put in quarantine” today, if you mean business and will resolutely break the habit of constantly thinking over that problem.

Whenever you think about any subject, you are treating it with your thought- either for good or evil.

The lip of truth shall be established for ever . . . (Proverbs 12:19)

************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Shake Up, Wake Up

We turn to God for help when our foundation is shaking, only to recognize that it is God who is shaking it.

~ Charles Weston ~

In Bali I observed a cremation procession. The body of the de-ceased was placed on top of a high ornate wooden tower called a “horse.” Every few minutes along the way to the cremation ground, the pallbearers broke into shouts of glee and laughter and twirled the horse, with the body fastened to its apex, in circles. When I asked a local fellow about the purpose of this ritual, he explained that the pallbearers spun the bier to confuse the deceased’s spirit so it could not find its way back to the body, and thus hasten the soul on its journey to the next life.

From time to time, life shakes us up, twirling or even destroying the foundation we’ve built. Such an experience can be quite disorienting—and it is supposed to be. The purpose of change beyond our control is to shake us up so we must hasten in a new direction.

Like the soul that has left the body of the deceased, we may not be able to find our way back to our past base. But the past is dead, and there is no reason to return. We are free to move on to discover a new life in a new world. Upheaval is a gift of love. When it comes, ask to see the blessing in what you’re being forced to release, to make way for something new and better.

Help me let go gracefully so I can be open to richer blessings.

I accept change as a gift. I move from good to better to best.

[majestyjo]

February 21

Step by Step

Today: “Keep It Sweet and Simple!” In the end, the complexities and sometimes grueling work of the Twelve Steps come down to a cardinal action: if I do not want to deal with the shakes through the day and the oblivion of drunkenness; if I do not want to deal with guilt, remorse, shame and self-degradation; if I do not want the numbing pain of letting down myself and anyone who has stood with me through the worst of my drinking days and the best of my recovery; if I do not want to devote any part of the day and night with my head in a toilet throwing up and with the dry heaves; if I don’t want to take bed sheets to the laundromat for an unplanned wash because they got soaked by my own vomit; if I don’t want to risk getting nailed for drunk driving and the subsequent court-ordered fines and fees, alcohol classes and triple car insurance rates; if I want to continue to progress in recovery and sobriety; if I want to nurture the re-established relationships that were previously broken and responsibilities that went neglected because of drinking; if I want to keep clear of self-pity, anger, confusion, and anguish; if I want to claim honestly that I am sober today; today, I won’t drink. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE SIXTH PROMISE

We shall lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.

~ Big Book ~

We came into the Program as experts in dishonesty, deceit, envy, and self-pity. Selfishness was an emotion that fitted us well. We were shameless in the ways we found useful in taking advantage of other people. The victims of our selfishness most often were those who loved us and tried to help us.

Our self-importance was based on unreality and was the effect of addicted behaviour. We engaged in far out thinking that reached the heights of fantasy. Our selfishness and self-centeredness developed within all of us a sick ego that turned into a powerhouse of grandiosity. The arrogance of an ego-driven addict was a drawback to willingness. In such a state of being, only miracles could help us.

In my addiction, my selfishness made me a “me first” person. In recovery, I am interested in the well-being of others. This has caused my self-interest to disappear.

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

~ William Arthur Ward ~

We could never have arrived at this point in our lives without the help of a lot of other people. It has been said that we stand on the shoulders of all those who have gone before us. But we also benefited from many people in our lives who were kind, who believed in us when we didn’t believe very strongly in ourselves—and from the anonymous multitude of men and women who shone a light on the path to recovery. Sometimes we know within our hearts that someone made a big difference to us, but it is hard to admit it to that person. We may even develop a grudging attitude toward people who have helped us because we are stingy about giving them any credit.

The surprising thing about gratitude is that the more we express it, the larger it grows. As grown men, we all have a mountain of things and people to be thankful for. If we don’t express gratitude, our withholding diminishes us. The more we say it and give it away, the bigger and stronger we feel.

Today I will thank someone who has helped me.

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Practiced consistently, new habits become who I am.

~ Lin Andrukat ~

We sometimes have trouble defining ourselves. Anyone who spends much time in our presence, however, can define us pretty accurately. Our habits tell our “story” quite readily.

Many of our behaviors embarrass us, yet we repeat them. But changing them takes more than wishing they’d disappear. It takes a decision not to repeat them and the thoughtfulness to find a replacement for them. We return to old behaviors more out of laziness than intent.

Those of us in a Twelve Step program have the tools to make this shift in our behavior easier. Doing a Fourth Step to look at the past, and frequent Tenth Steps to stay on top of today, gives us the insight to define who we are and who we’d rather be. Changing who we are isn’t that difficult if we have the desire.

Any current behavior used to be “new.” It became a habit only with continuous use. I can decide to begin a new behavior today.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need time to change

Getting into recovery, it was hard enough to admit my emotional illness and my addiction to chemicals. For some time after, I could hardly see my character defects, let alone admit to them.

Having done a Fourth, Fifth, and Sixth Step, I feel willing—no, eager—to let go of my shortcomings. But as much as I want to change now, I can’t just say “Change!” and be changed. My addiction has taught me that change requires time, patience, and the help of my higher power. As I continue to work the program, I need to be aware of my shortcomings and allow them to be removed by my higher power when the time is right.

Today I will pray for patience and self-acceptance.

***********************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The mental obsession begins to interfere with one’s work, home life, social activities, and spirituality.

~ Joan Ebbitt ~

One of addiction’s most destructive aspects is the binge, whether it be with alcohol, other drugs, food, sex, or gambling.

A lot of times we’ll swear it’s the last one, but it never is. A day or two or a week or two later we binge again. It satisfies a deep need that willpower alone cannot appease, and announces to any who would hear that this is an addiction. If we add up the binges we can see the disease process. Over years and years and years.

The next time these feelings start, we can call our sponsor, go to a meeting, and talk about how it feels. Reaching out enables us to move through feelings without bingeing. It’s not an easy thing to talk about, but the relief we get once the urge has passed makes it all worth it. For that we can be grateful.

Today let me use the tools I’ve acquired to avoid a binge.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.

~ Conan O’Brien ~

It has been said, “The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man’s observation, not overturning it.” In fact, the word dialogue means talking between two sides. A dialogue includes an exchange of thoughts, opinions, and feelings. It means expressing yourself but also hearing what others have to say. It means opening your mind and absorbing the words of others.

Thinking only of your pleasure, considering only your own needs, and talking over the conversations of others are not components of good communication. Freedom of speech does not give you the license to say anything you want whenever you want, just because you feel like it. Communication with others requires responsible use.

One of the most important tools in recovery is listening—not just to others, but also to your Higher Power. It means opening both your ears and your heart to under-stand what others are going through. It means listening with attentiveness rather than framing what you are going to say. It means letting someone speak fully, without interruption. And it means communicating through prayer— but then listening to the guidance of your Higher Power.

Today I will think and listen before I speak.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The twilight, in fact, had several stages, and several times after it had grown dusky, acquired a new transparency, and the trees on the hillsides were lit up again.

~ Henry David Thoreau ~

There are small candles of light we can bring into our lives to take away some of the darkness. These are the candles of the program—soft, warm lights given to us each time we open our faith and trust to the fellowship.

There is the candle we can take home from a meeting, kindled by the caring and sharing of those around us. There is the candle given to us by our sponsors and friends, which burns brighter each time we ask for help. And there is the candle given to us by our Higher Power—an eternal light reflecting strength, hope, and salvation.

It’s true that it’s darkest before the dawn, but we have countless candles to brighten our night.

How can these candles help me through the night?

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Becoming free

Many of us have said, “I want the freedom to be who I am.” Do we realize, however, that our freedom is only as broad as the freedom we grant others? The more we let someone else be who he or she is, the more freedom we have to be ourselves.

Other people—people who are different from us—are mirrors for us. They can help us see what we’re doing well or poorly; but more than that, they can be models for us and show us the way.

Am I becoming free?

Higher Power, help me learn the valuable lessons of diversity.

I will work on freedom today by acknowledging the differences between myself and (name two people)

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Living entirely turned in on oneself is like trying to play on a violin with slackened strings.

~ JACQUES LUSSEYRAN ~

Newcomer

I went to a meeting today feeling angry, rebellious, and bored. I hated sitting there, and I hardly listened. It was the round-robin kind of meeting where the discussion goes from person to person: you get to share without raising your hand. When it was my turn, I said how resentful and different I felt, how I hated everything about the program and didn’t think it could help me. People nodded, some laughed, and the speaker said, “We’ve all been there.” I felt relieved. Often, I don’t start feeling okay until almost the end of a meeting. I wish I didn’t have to keep going through this.

Sponsor

As an addicted person, I have a special talent for letting negative thoughts and feelings take over. It’s as if my mind were a balloon filled with heavy, dark stuff; left to my own devices, I keep blowing it bigger, filling it with more of the same. It takes another person, someone who lives outside of my mind, to prick the balloon and let my tired old thoughts escape. Suddenly, reality looks completely different. That’s one reason to get to some small meetings where we’re more likely to have a chance to share. And it’s always a good idea to stay through a whole meeting; in an hour, things can change! I’ve noticed that even when I share my most unacceptable feelings, people in recovery don’t reject me; when I tell the worst about myself; they listen and laugh. I love the laughter in meetings; it reminds me of how lucky we are to be alive again.

Today, it’s safe for me to risk getting close to other human beings by sharing honestly.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The effectiveness of AA is largely built upon understanding and human sympathy. These characteristics were not acquired from a book but learned the hard way as we, too, traveled the long dark alley of despair in search of a helping hand and an understanding heart.

Creeds and ideologies are for preachers and students to debate and reason, but our doctrine of love and understanding has nothing to do with reason; frequently it is contrary to reason, as it comes from the heart and not the head.

************************************************

~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) GOD: Get Out Devil

2) How you respond is your responsibility.

3) Whatever you are trying to avoid, we won’t go away until you confront it.

************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Sailor’s Prayer

Dear God, be good to me. The sea is so wide, and my boat is so small.

***********************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

QUARANTINE YOUR TROUBLES

When you are praying or “treating” about a particular thing, you should handle it, mentally, very carefully indeed. The ideal way is not to think about it at all except when you are actually praying about it. Moreover, to talk to the other people about it is exceedingly likely to invite failure.

When a new problem presents itself to you, decline to consider it except in the light of Truth. I call this “putting a subject in quarantine.” Even an old long-standing problem can be “put in quarantine” today, if you mean business and will resolutely break the habit of constantly thinking over that problem.

Whenever you think about any subject, you are treating it with your thought- either for good or evil.

The lip of truth shall be established for ever . . . (Proverbs 12:19)

************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Shake Up, Wake Up

We turn to God for help when our foundation is shaking, only to recognize that it is God who is shaking it.

~ Charles Weston ~

In Bali I observed a cremation procession. The body of the de-ceased was placed on top of a high ornate wooden tower called a “horse.” Every few minutes along the way to the cremation ground, the pallbearers broke into shouts of glee and laughter and twirled the horse, with the body fastened to its apex, in circles. When I asked a local fellow about the purpose of this ritual, he explained that the pallbearers spun the bier to confuse the deceased’s spirit so it could not find its way back to the body, and thus hasten the soul on its journey to the next life.

From time to time, life shakes us up, twirling or even destroying the foundation we’ve built. Such an experience can be quite disorienting—and it is supposed to be. The purpose of change beyond our control is to shake us up so we must hasten in a new direction.

Like the soul that has left the body of the deceased, we may not be able to find our way back to our past base. But the past is dead, and there is no reason to return. We are free to move on to discover a new life in a new world. Upheaval is a gift of love. When it comes, ask to see the blessing in what you’re being forced to release, to make way for something new and better.

Help me let go gracefully so I can be open to richer blessings.

I accept change as a gift. I move from good to better to best.

[majestyjo]

February 22

Step by Step

Today, indecision is NO decision and not deciding is stagnation – in growth, progress, sobriety, moving forward, moving on. If some issue has immobilized me with uncertainty or fear of the outcome, the uncertainty of no resolution will likely progress to a breaking point. And, for me, the breaking point could be my sobriety. Today, enough is enough. I will decide, and I will call on the program and higher power how best to resolve the thing that has hung over my head far too long. And in coming to a decision, God grant me the wisdom that the outcome may be what I need and not necessarily what want. Today, no decision will yield to decision, and what has kept me stagnant loses its control. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE SEVENTH PROMISE

Self-seeking will slip away.

~Big Book ~

When we were using, constant self-seeking was our whole existence. Being forced to cut down or stop was impossible to imagine. It was an invasion of our right to live as we wished. It didn’t matter that that choice was creating physical suffering and mental anguish for us and those who loved us.

We were always on the defensive. Our answer to any accusation or plea to quite was always “it’s none of your business,” or “let me live my own life.”

With abstinence, we began to practice understanding, humility, gratitude, caring and sharing with others, openmindedness, faith in our Program’s recovery Steps, love of others, and belonging in a world of positiveness and action. We are beginning to attain a life where we realize we are truly people who need people.

When I became abstinent, I learned that making constant spiritual progress is what life is truly all about, and the self-seeking slipped away.

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

If you do not make it empty, how will you fill it up again?

~ Neem Karoli Baba ~

There is a myth that most men believe: we should always be on top of any situation, and we shouldn’t show weakness or vulnerability. But the myth creates a paradox, because if we are never vulnerable, we are never open to learning anything new. How can we learn anything new if we have to look like we already know the answers? So we become weaker while trying to appear strong.

It is said that nothing can be added to a vessel that is already full. A truly strong, wise man is willing to doubt, and willing to empty himself of his preconceived ideas so that he continues to learn and grow.

Today I will not concern myself with being right Instead I will strive to have an open mind.

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

A baby learning to walk falls a lot.

~ Kathleen Rowe ~

We are developing new attitudes, new behaviors, new patterns for nearly every activity in our lives. We can’t be expected to master them immediately. The commitment to make progress on a daily basis is quite enough.

We won’t be perfect. Ever. The determination to keep improving is as close to perfection as we need ever come. The challenge is in the effort. The growth is in the effort too. We are in this program to grow and change. It will happen, sometimes in spite of ourselves, if we keep showing up to do the footwork.

Falling while learning to put a better foot forward is expected. The learning process is just that: a process. A little effort, one day at a time, will hone our new skills. In no time, we will look back on our old selves with disbelief. How did we come so far, so fast?

I may make plenty of mistakes today. I can accept that. I’m learning and moving forward.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am doing well

For a while, the pain of my dual disorder was so great, I could hardly believe I would ever be OK again. I had little strength and saw no way out. Yet in detox one day, a miracle happened: I finally hit bottom.

These days I take a walk around the block twice a day, sometimes with a friend from my support group. Recently I met with my sponsor and she’ll be giving me my anniversary pin next week. With my doctor’s help I am now taking a medication that diminishes my psychiatric symptoms with even fewer side effects. Looking back, I am amazed—amazed and grateful. Because today, I am abstinent and stable.

I will strengthen my commitment to recovery by offering to do service at my Step meeting.

***********************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

You can never plan the future by the past.

~ Edmund Burke ~

Intoxication used to give us something we thought we couldn’t get any other way. As addiction set in, the pleasure faded. We kept drinking or using because we didn’t know how to stop. But as we begin feeling well again and our pain fades, we may forget. The “bad old days” can start to seem like “the good old days,” and that’s dangerous.

We can learn to block these thoughts, and think about something else until the danger passes. It’s important to plan for these times, much as we would plan for any other emergency. Maintaining close ties with our sponsor and supportive friends is insurance for rough times. Reminding ourselves each day of the things we can be grateful for in recovery clarifies our thinking. Praying every day keeps our hearts open to our Higher Power, who can handle the things we can’t. And eating well and resting when we need to rest means self-respect, that we’ll be able to do all the rest. All these things we can do today, before distorted thinking sets in.

And in doing these things we’ll come to believe that real “good old days” are the ones we’re living right now.

Today help me replace negative thoughts and actions with positive ones.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The regularity of a habit is generally in proportion to its absurdity.

~ Marcel Proust ~

Before you entered a program of recovery, how did you measure your progress in letting go of bad habits? Did you tell yourself, “I only had one drink instead of the whole bottle,” or “I only bought five scratch tickets this week,” or “I only used once last month.” Such statements represent false progress. No matter how such justifications may have made you feel better, you were still actively engaged in your habit.

Progress is measured by what constitutes true success. If true success is to never drink again, then having one drink is not successful. If true success is to quit gambling, then buying even one lottery ticket is not successful. If true success is to get clean, then using is not successful.

The motivation to achieve progress begins within you. Without your buy-in from the start, you cannot move forward. Each day you do not drink, or gamble, or use is a step toward success. Even if you experience false progress from time to time, each day presents you with the opportunity to strengthen—or restrengthen—your resolve and commitment to being clean and sober.

Today I will be committed to my progress in breaking bad habits and in taking the steps I need in my recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Prayer is neither black magic nor is it a form of demand note. Prayer is a relationship.

~ John Heuss ~

A conversation requires two parts: talking and listening. When only we are talking, that is a monologue. When someone lectures, we listen. Prayer can be a form of conversation, yet if we examine the way we pray we may find it’s a monologue.

We pray to ask for answers or guidance, to express our gratitude, and to bless those we care for. It’s wonderful to open up a channel to our Higher Power by beginning the conversation, but unless we allow time to listen we will never really develop a dialogue.

We can begin to change our way of praying. We can limit our requests so we are not listing a series of wishes or demands. We can ask for patience to listen and then allow a few moments to listen. The answers will come to us and our guidance will be given when we are truly ready to receive them. An equal balance of talking and listening will help strengthen our relationship with our Higher Power.

I will pray and then listen, to allow my Higher Power some time to communicate with me.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Taking the Steps

We used drugs for many reasons. Often it was to take the edge off life. In the beginning drugs made the world more beautiful, more satisfying. Toward the end we used drugs to turn off our guilt, fear, and loneliness. The drugs began to cause more problems than they cured. Finally, using met none of our needs at all.

By working the Steps, however, we can learn to meet our needs in constructive, rather than destructive, ways.

Am I working all the Steps necessary to meet my needs without chemicals?

Higher Power, help me find those things in life—sober and clean—that I was trying to find by using drugs.

Today I will work on Step

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The total person sings, not just the vocal chords.

~ ESTHER BRONER ~

Newcomer

Last night, I dreamed I had a slip. There I was, sneaking my addictive substance, in such a small quantity that it didn’t seem to matter. When I realized that I’d have to face people at a meeting, I thought, “I just won’t tell them; they’ll never know.” I woke up with my heart pounding. It seemed so real that at first I wasn’t sure it had been a dream.

Sponsor

Most of us have had dreams or fantasies of using, especially in early recovery. They’re useful as a source of information, like a letter from one part of the mind to another. They remind us of who we are: underneath conscious awareness is someone who wouldn’t mind going back to using and being sneaky and dishonest, who wouldn’t care if we died in the process. The good news is that this was a dream, that you woke up in recovery, and that you chose to share your discomfort. Acknowledging our negative thoughts robs them of their power over us. Dreaming of a relapse, and talking about it, may help keep us from having one.

Today, I am not in denial.
Awareness of my addictive self strengthens my recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

You cannot know and appreciate wisdom unless you are also acquainted with a liberal amount of pure folly. Folly provides the lessons that really stick in our memories and provide danger signals to govern our decisions in our future conduct.

For that reason the lessons learned overnight in a jail cell outlast those acquired after long periods of study. Believe you me, those lessons are seldom forgotten.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Gratitude is not the word but the desire to say the word.

2) It one is good, more is better!

3) Humility doesn’t mean thinking any less of yourself, just of yourself less often.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

An Irish Blessing

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rain fall softly on your fields,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CHANGE FROM WITHIN

Man is a mental being, and to know that is the first step on the road to freedom and prosperity, for as long as you believe yourself to be primarily physical, a superior kind of animal, you will remain in bondage- in bondage, that is to say, to your own habits of thought, for there is no other bondage.

Since you are a mental being, you will see how foolish it is to endeavor to improve your conditions by altering your environment while leaving your mind unchanged. To attempt this is to foredoom yourself to disappointment. Mind is cause, and experience is effect. If you do not like the experience or effect that you are getting, the obvious remedy is to alter the cause then the effect will naturally alter too.

Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is within the cup and platter, than the outside of them may be clean also (Matthew 23:26).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Just Be You

Now all that is left is for you to become yourself.

~ Sense ~

The renowned sage Rabbi Zusya wept as he lay on his deathbed. His students, gathered by his side, were astonished. “Rabbi, why do you weep?” one of them asked. “If anyone is assured of a place in heaven, it is you!”

“I’ll tell you why,” the learned one answered softly. “If, when I approach the gates of heaven, I am asked, ‘Why were you not a Moses?’ I will answer, ‘Because I was not born to do what Moses did.’ And if the heavenly host argues, ‘You did not perform the miracles that Elijah did,’ I shall tell them, ‘Those were Elijah’s miracles to perform, not mine.’ My friends, the only question I fear I shall be unable to answer is: ‘Why were you not a Rabbi Zusya?’”

Destiny is a personal adventure. Just as no two snowflakes or finger–prints are alike, every soul comes into this world for a unique purpose. Each of us manifests good according to our own strengths and intentions. Never compare your worth to that of others because you did not accomplish what they did; you were never supposed to be like them.

Your highest purpose in life is to be true to yourself. If you honor your personal gifts, intuition, inclinations, and visions, you will fulfill your destiny and serve many others in the process.

Help me be true to who and what I am. I trust that the gifts and visions You planted within me are good. Illuminate my path that I may bless the world.

I am whole as God created me. I walk the path appointed me with confidence and joy.

[majestyjo]

February 23

Step by Step

Today, if life sneaks in unexpected tasks or frustration that delay my plans, I will not cave to anger or a sense of failure at not carrying out my plans to completion. Even if my patience or expectations of myself or others are stretched to the max, I will not whine with self-pity or anything else negative because, if I have gotten through the last 24 Hours sober, I have literally nothing to complain about and absolutely everything for which to be grateful and humble. I have no excuse to morph frustration or anger into self-imposed isolation because isolation is the breeding ground for loneliness – and loneliness can be lethal in recovery. But should I feel lonely, I will reach out to someone who can lend an empathetic – not sympathetic – ear or, in the spirit the 12th step, jump into some form of service to someone or something in need and want. An old saying is that the non-addict who has a flat tire calls Triple A, but the recovering alcoholic with a flat calls Suicide Prevention. Today, I will use the steps to keep events and things in their proper perspective and, if I find I have a flat tire today, I’ll call roadside assistance. Suicide Prevention has other people in greater need. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE EIGHTH PROMISE

Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change.

~Big Book ~

Before the Program, the only changes in our lives were in the substances we were using, our companions, or the place we went to use. We only changed the way we obeyed the commands of our compulsion. What didn’t change was the fact that our lives always became worse.

We never admitted that our addiction was our enemy. We always considered it to be a friend in times of need. We believed it was the only way to enjoy life—unti it began to destroy that life. Then we realized it must be put entirely out of our lives if we were to survive.

Our attitudes and outlook on life changed for the better in every way when we began to practice abstinence and work the Steps.

Today I see exciting changes occurring physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am no longer a slave to the limited changes dictated by my addiction.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Conscience is God’s presence in man.

~ Emanuel Swedenborg ~

As we mature, our conscience grows, and vice versa. We follow a principle that directs us to promptly admit when we are wrong. That practical piece of guidance is the most effective way to become bigger, stronger men. To follow it, we must abandon our ego’s desire to always be right. We must abandon the thought that we are belittled by such an admission.

In this process of becoming better men, we open ourselves and allow God to enter. We let God speak to us and through us by humbly accepting that we don’t always have to be right. The higher principles of honesty and responsibility are our guides, and we don’t expect perfection from ourselves. In that way, we become more honest with ourselves and with our friends.

Today I will be open to the truth that my Higher Power speaks within me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Healing can occur when I see my family of origin as just a vessel to bring me into new spiritual growth, rather than as the predictor of all my life’s work.

~ Judi Hollis ~

Traumatic experiences often teach us the most. This surprises us at first: How could the pain have had value? How could God have allowed it? It’s futile to ponder these questions. We experienced what was necessary to fulfill our life’s purpose. We are doing so now.

Many of us came from punishing families. Our successes were ignored, our failures held up for ridicule. How we functioned in our families gave us opportunities to fail so we could then appreciate success, to experience pain so we could understand compassion, to know regret so we could nurture forgiveness. Our families educated us. What we do with what we learned determines where we go now.

Every day I am embarking on an adventure. What I do with my experiences today can be a positive reaction to what I learned from the past.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I don’t have to believe in God to have a higher power

When I first tried the Twelve Step program, I thought I had to believe in God to recover from my dual disorder. I thought maybe it was a religious organization and I wanted no part of it. This made it harder for me to attend six trial meetings, as my therapist had suggested.

But somehow—my higher power perhaps?—I stuck with it and I have since learned differently. I’ve learned that to recover, all I need to do is believe two things: that I cannot recover on my own and that something else can help me. For instance, some people consider the group itself a higher power and some use a friend or sponsor. Knowing this, I can work Step Two and continue in my spiritual recovery.

I will draw a picture or write a brief description of my higher power.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Practice is the best instruction of them all.

~ Publilius Syrus ~

Rome wasn’t built in a day, and recovery doesn’t happen overnight. Some newcomers look too far ahead and get discouraged when they realize all the work a sound recovery program requires. But it’s really very simple. We learn a few important basics, and then practice, practice, practice. Just like playing the piano or driving a car, we get the essentials first, and then practice until we perfect them.

Consistency is important. We don’t become abstinent by cutting down on our addiction; it’s all or nothing. We can’t claim to be honest by lying only on occasion; we’re either dishonest or we’re honest. We won’t learn forgiveness by keeping certain names on our hate list, or making amends to just a few. And we can’t learn the principles of our Twelve Step program by attending meetings once in a while; we must make a firm commitment to put our program above all other concerns and honor that commitment.

Soon the right thing is our first choice, without much effort, and with no pain at all. And one day we realize our practice has paid off in a whole new life.

Today help me practice being the kind of person I want to be Help me earn my own respect.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We are not unlike a particularly hardy crustacean…. With each passage from one stage of human growth to the next we, too, must shed a protective structure.

~ Gail Sheehy ~

In his book First You Have to Row a Little Boat, author Richard Bode reflects on his passion for boating. Looking back from the vantage point of adulthood, he discovers that a little boat from his childhood provided him not only with great experience in learning how to navigate the ocean, but also in learning how to move through life. “God gave the wind,” he writes. “I didn’t pick the wind; that was imposed by a power far greater than myself. But I had to sail the wind… until it led me at last to a sheltered cove.”

There are silent currents that flow in and out of each day that may send you in directions you had not in-tended or anticipated. Resolve to stay calm if things do not go the way you planned or hoped for. Resolve to be one with your Higher Power and to use the strength you receive to navigate any disruptions.

I will choose to face life today with a serene spirit and calm poise. I will not fight the winds of change, but instead sail them with ease into safe harbors.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

More important than learning how to recall things is finding ways to forget things that are cluttering the mind. Before going to sleep at night, empty your consciousness of unwanted things, even as you empty your pockets.

~ Eric Butterworth ~

Many of us may make lists of things we need to do. We may refer to a calendar for our scribbled notations of places to go and people to see. We may look over our course syllabus for chapters to read or papers to write. Or we may keep it all in our heads, mentally checking off each item as it’s done.

But tonight we can put away the lists, close the calendar book, put away the course syllabus, and empty our minds of obligations, tasks, and duties. Unless we want to keep our heads spinning during a sleepless night, we must learn to turn off the achieving and doing sides of our minds and give room to the relaxing and spiritual sides. We can take away the items cluttering our minds, one at a time. Tomorrow will arrive in its own time; tonight is the time for us to relax.

Tonight I can close my eyes and visualize putting aside each item. I will achieve total relaxation and peace.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being sick and tired

We get sick and tired of blaming others for our faults. We get sick and tired of running the show. We get sick and tired of trying to impress people. We are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

We need only remember that when anything gets to be too much, when we get sick and tired of anything, God is always ready to help to take it from us.

Am I feeling sick and tired about anything now?

Higher Power, help me turn things over to you before I get that sick and tired feeling.

Today I will ask my Higher Power to take over two problems.
They are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Earth’s the right place for love.

~ ROBERT FROST ~

Newcomer

I have to get up early in the morning, so I don’t like hanging around after evening meetings. I always thank the speaker, but then I leave pretty quickly, so that I won’t get caught in one of those long, drawn-out conversations, miss out on sleep, and feel tired the next day. I do feel a little funny leaving, though, almost as if I’m sneaking out.

Sponsor

I wonder if you’re leaving early because you don’t have a second to spare, or for some other reason. There’s a happy medium, somewhere between a long, drawn-out conversation and sneaking out. Saying hello, sharing some hugs or handshakes, exchanging phone numbers with someone we’d like to talk to later, or briefly joining the crew that’s putting away chairs are some of the simple ways of feeling more like a part of things.

For me, making genuine contact with my peers in recovery is essential. When I was in early recovery, I called myself “shy” or “too busy” when in truth I was wary of people, even somewhat frightened. I chose to sit at the edge of things, then blamed others for my belief that I was an outsider. Becoming willing to set limits, to say no confidently when I needed to, freed me to enjoy getting to know others.

To be at ease in a group of people doesn’t always come naturally, but it’s one of the most important areas of recovery.

Today, I make good use of time by reaching out to people.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Criticism is often the sincerest form of flattery. We are all subject to it at times if we do anything at all. When criticism does arise, and before you build up a first rate resentment, think first—who is it that criticizes? What is the motive behind it? Is it constructive or just plain antagonistic? Is it prompted by jealousy or ignorance? Would you do the same thing again if you had it to do over? What does your conscience say about it?

No great man escaped having enemies; all the old masters had critics; all political and social reforms had their adversaries and the early disciples of all new religions were persecuted, stoned and crucified.

If you are criticized you may possibly be right, but if you are ignored you know you are wrong.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) We fear the things we want the most.

2) GOD: Go On Dreaming

3) If you are eating a **** sandwich, chances are, you ordered it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

First Things First

Dear Higher Power, remind me:
To tidy up my own mind,
To keep my sense of values straight,
To sort out the possible and the impossible,
To turn the impossible over to You,
And get busy on the possible.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

BEAR HUGS KETTLE

There is an anecdote of the Far West that carries a wonderful lesson. It appears that a party of hunters, being called away from their camp, left the campfire unattended, with a kettle of water boiling on it.

Presently an old bear crept out of the woods, and, seeing the kettle with its lid dancing about on top, promptly seized it. The boiling water scalded him badly; but instead of dropping the kettle instantly, he proceeded to hug it tightly—this being a bear’s idea of defense. Of course, the tighter he hugged it the more it burned him; the more it burned him the tighter he hugged it; and so on in a vicious circle, to the undoing of the bear.

This illustrates perfectly the way in which many people hug their difficulties to their bosoms by constantly rehearsing them to themselves and others.

Whenever you catch yourself thinking about your grievances, say to yourself sternly: “Bear hugs kettle,” and think about God instead. You will be surprised how quickly some long-standing wounds will heal.

Mine eyes are ever toward the Lord . . . (Psalm 25:15).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Ain’t No Future in the Past

Don’t let the past remind us of what we are not now.

~ from the song, “Suite: Judy Blue Eyes,” by Stephen Stills ~

The last time I had seen Cora, she was a weak, heavily medicated chronic asthma patient who labored to walk from her living room to her bathroom. She had literally died in the hospital and been revived. When Cora showed up at my seminar a year later, I was amazed to see that she had lost a great deal of weight, gotten free of her medication, and looked vital and radiant.

When, during the seminar, the attendees were slated to hike up a mountain, I worried that this moderate trek would be too much for Cora, and I suggested she take a more gentle walk. Instead, she began to lead the group up the mountain! She set a dynamic pace, and the rest of the participants had to hustle to keep up with her. Was this the same woman, I wondered, whose family had been advised by doctors to say their good-byes to her?

No, it was not the same woman. The sick woman I remembered had died and been resurrected as healthy. It was only in my thoughts that I maintained a distorted image of an ill Cora. I was trying to stuff a new and expanded being into a tiny box to which I consigned her in my mind.

Cora’s transformation offers a profound model of the way we keep each other bound to our past—and can liberate ourselves to be entirely new in the present. We must be open to being new and seeing new; otherwise we freeze our friends and ourselves as we were, and we die to the life and power of the moment. Our only hope to truly live is to release our past in favor of the now moment. Ever since I saw Cora master that mountain, I’ve realized that anything is possible—if we let it be.

Help me to see anew today. Exchange everything that was, for everything that could be.

Infinite possibilities are available to me now. I accept the best as reality.

[majestyjo]

February 24

Step by Step

Today, apply the program more widely and remember it is developed not solely to guide us to sobriety but to detect and correct the character flaws that enabled our drinking. Being dry is all we can expect if the only action we take is to quit drinking. Abstinence by itself won’t earn us the sobriety and peace if we do not uncover, admit and either give up or correct the dysfunctional dynamics of our spiritual and emotional characters. Being dry is a major step forward from our drinking days, but dry without peace puts us at significant risk of relapse if we turn a blind eye to the defective parts of our character. And because simply being dry puts us on the edge of a relapse waiting to happen, AA helps us to deal with the defects in mental, spiritual and emotional characters. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE NINTH PROMISE

Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.

~Big Book ~

When we were deep in our compulsions and obsessions, we were afraid of people, especially those who loved us. We were terrified we would not have the necessities of life. And we usually lost both.

Addiction so warped our minds, we were constantly fantasizing dangers from sources we could not identify or bring into focus. These fantasies became our reality. All the “ghosts that never were” could be traced to one major fear: that of the unknown. We distrusted people, places, and things.

Now we welcome them. Our new friends, surroundings, and tools for living are life-saving. Now when “fear knocks, faith answers – and no one is there.” Our Program teaches us to trust ourselves, others, and our Higher Power. The rest take care of itself.

The only things I used to trust were those I was addicted to. When I began to put my trust in the Program and my Higher Power, the destruction stopped and the recovery began.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Woe to the man so possessed that he possesses God!

~ Martin Buber ~

When we first set out on this spiritual path, we learn that a relationship with “God as we understood Him” is a requirement for healing. So many of us think that we have to begin by defining our personal understanding of God. This is indeed a good question for us to think about. Yet the greatest thinkers, beginning in the most ancient times, have told us that God is truly beyond definition. In the oldest Judeo-Christian history, even the name of God could not be pronounced.

It is one thing to ask where we find our spiritual renewal. It is another thing to try to invent it. And as soon as we think we have the answer, as soon as we believe we hold the true definition of God, we may be off the spiritual path. In the end, the true spiritual path is always a learning process and has a good deal of mystery.

Today I turn my life over to God, Whom I can never fully understand.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We will never hear anyone else’s thoughts if we are only listening to our own.

~ Cathy Stone ~

It’s not a defect to think. On the contrary, we need to examine all the issues in our lives, evaluating very carefully what action to take in each instance. Many of us are still clearing up the mayhem that occurred because we didn’t give enough thought to situations in the past. But there is nothing gained by constant self-analysis, particularly during those moments when God has sent a friend to share with us her story or perspective.

It’s never an accident when another person discusses with us an experience she has had. God intends for us to learn from one another. We are students and teachers, interchangeably. When a teacher comes our way, let’s put our minds to rest. Her words may supply the answer we seek.

I will be drawn to the people who have something to teach me today. I will listen first and think later.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I have a simple job to do

I suppose it’s not unusual, but my life is highly troubled at this stage of dual recovery. I am going through many changes and feeling much pain. When I hit bottom a while back, I thought my problems were at their worst. But these days, they seem little better. I feel frustrated and confused.

So I took my struggles to my Step group, and as usual, got some support. I was reminded that it will help to keep my life, my focus, as simple as possible these days. I have only one task with two parts: stay abstinent and stable. Nothing is more important. If I take Step One, accept that I have these problems, and keep coming to meetings so I can get support working the rest of the program, I will recover. It’s that simple.

I will make a reminder card that reads “Today I want abstinence and stability. I will do what it takes to recover.”

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I live in my body, so taking care of it is the most important housework I can do.

~ Terry S. ~

Recovery may mean great strides in mental and spiritual health, but what about our physical health? Often we neglect this aspect of our recovery.

Broadening our recovery to include physical fitness can mean walking, outdoor exercise, visits to an aerobics class, or a simple home-exercise routine several days a week. It doesn’t have to be the best exercise program in the world, just a simple one that works for us. And it’s not something we have to become the best at. Whatever is right for us.

The first step is consulting our physician to find out what’s best for us. Then, once we’re up and moving, we’ll find the benefits of regular exercise to be well worth the effort. When our bodies are fit, we feel better physically, mentally, and spiritually and can fully enjoy all the rewards of recovery.

Today help me exercise.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life.

~ Oliver C. Wilson ~

Sometimes life presents you with a difficult loss, a great disappointment, or a seemingly insurmountable challenge. Life is filled with a great many unknowns—both wonderful surprises as well as unexpected disasters.

Self-pity is, essentially, an attitude of ingratitude. Self- pity looks at what you cannot do, what you do not or cannot have, what you have lost, and what you cannot change. Self-pity is absorbed and selfish, for self-pity says, “Look at me. I feel awful. My life is a mess. I will never get better.” On and on self-pity goes, starting out as a trickling stream and gradually swelling into a raging flood.

A positive attitude is the dreaded and hated enemy of self-pity. A positive attitude focuses on what you can do, what you do and can have, what you have gained, and what you can change. A positive attitude displays care for yourself and others. A positive attitude seeks and sees progress. A positive attitude motivates and encourages. A positive attitude is the perfect companion to living a physically, mentally, and spiritually fulfilling life. Today, you have a choice: feel pity or embrace positivity.

Starting now, I will get off my pity pot and live life with both a positive attitude and an attitude of gratitude.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Be patient with the faults of others; they have to be patient with yours.

~ Our Daily Bread ~

How do we feel when someone we know makes a mistake? What happens when the boss makes an error and we have to work overtime to straighten it out? How do we feel when a cashier overcharges us, the post office loses our package, or the mechanic doesn’t fix a problem?

Most of us become angry. Since we have been brought up from childhood to believe we are victims, it seems only natural in adult life to feel the same way. We imagine all those people had it in for us; they were all in league somehow to make us suffer.

But everybody makes mistakes. Who among us is perfect? We have made many mistakes in our lives that have probably brought inconveniences to others. If we can learn to treat the faults of others with patience and understanding instead of anger and resentment, we may find others treating us accordingly.

I can overlook the mistakes of others as I would want them to overlook mine.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being grateful

We grow in gratitude for the pure gift of being clean and sober. In time, we recognize and are grateful for its benefits.

The benefits we appreciate are many, including mended relationships with family and friends, the ability to sustain honesty in relationships, the awareness of our lives and our health, the ability to ask for help and to help others.

Am I grateful?

Higher Power, help me to be grateful each day for just being sober and clean and for the many blessings that brings.

I will express my gratitude today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Your misery can always be refunded.

~ SAYING HEARD AT MEETINGS ~

Newcomer

I heard someone say, “Recovery ruins your drinking.” What does that mean?

Sponsor

From our first day in recovery, we know that there is an alternative to our suffering. We may choose to ignore that knowledge, but we can’t entirely erase it. We can’t convince ourselves that we can safely go back to what we’ve done in the past. The recovering part of us just won’t buy it.

We’ve changed many things about our lives. We go to meetings, call sponsors, show up for work and for situations involving others. We read literature we hadn’t even heard of a short time ago, and we talk openly to people who, until recently, were complete strangers to us. We’re examining our lives, challenging every belief and value we previously held.

All this change is knowledge. If we return to an addictive substance or behavior after a period of recovery, we do so knowing that we’re acting out our addiction. We can’t sustain our denial; we know that we’re risking our lives and hurting others. And we know that there are people sitting in meetings, giving each other mutual support, facing the same addiction. It’s hard to pretend that acting on the addiction instead of treating it gives us lasting pleasure or security.

Today, I’m living in the solution, not in the problem.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We alcoholics know that one drink is too much and a barrel isn’t enough. That first drink starts the compulsion to drink.

Suppressing desires can become a habit just as their satisfaction does. Each time we say “NO” we weaken the old habit and strengthen the new.

The efforts to satisfy our desires led us to the excesses that brought about our alcoholism. So let us follow the advice of John Stuart Mill and “learn to seek our happiness by limiting our desires, rather than attempting to satisfy them.”

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Depression is a Defense, not a Disgrace.

2) Gratitude, that’s the attitude.

3) If you are not grateful for your sobriety, you will not stay sober.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Open Mind

Higher Power, may I understand:
To be alert to my own needs, not to the faults others;
To remain teachable;
To listen,
To keep an open mind; and
To learn not who’s right but what’s right.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

MAKING YOUR OWN FORTUNE

You think, and your thoughts materialize as experience, and thus it is, all unknown to yourself as a rule, that you are actually weaving the pattern of your own destiny, here and now, by the way in which you allow yourself to think, day by day and all day long.

Your fare is largely in your own hands. Nobody but yourself can keep you down. Neither parents, nor wives, nor husbands, nor employers, nor neighbors; nor poverty, nor ignorance, nor any power whatever can keep you out once you have learned how to think.

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ our Lord (Romans 8:38-39).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

So Far So Good

Through many dangers, toils, and snares we have already come; “Twas grace that brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home.

~ from the song, “Amazing Grace, ” by John Newton ~

When I was in college, I went to a rock festival in Puerto Rico, replete with every drug possible. One night I took a walk along the beach where many rock ‘n’ rollers were camping, and each person I passed handed me a pill or swig of alcohol. With great foolishness, I ingested every consciousness-altering agent I was given. It is no surprise that I had a bad trip. Every fearful and paranoid thought I ever entertained riled up to literally scare the hell out of me. During the night, I knew that I had really done it this time, and I was going to die.

Yet, somehow I made it through the night, and I remember sitting on a rock overlooking the beach, watching the sunrise. It was the most welcome sight I had ever seen. With the sun came the awareness that I had been forgiven, and my delusional fantasies were untrue. My idea of how I was to be punished was superseded by God’s idea of love.

Perhaps you, too, felt that you would never make it through the night or week. Then consider that you are still here. God’s law of grace is bigger than our notion of karma. You have a purpose here, and there is a force of love that keeps you going as long as your purpose is yet to be fulfilled. There are angels, guides, and guardians who watch over us to keep us safe and protected. There is an invisible force of good that guides us home, even when we have turned away from it.

Should you become fearful about the future or fall prey to the expectation of punishment, consider that you have been well taken care of thus far. All of your fears have been offset by grace. Could the current situation be an exception to the law of love?

Help me to remember that You are present wherever I am. Thank You for taking such good care of me even when I have not honored myself. Let me learn to love me as You do.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I -will dwell in the House of the Lord forever.

[majestyjo]

February 25

Step by Step

Today, admit that I abused, misused, took for granted and literally threw away through my drinking and actions all that I had been GIVEN unconditionally – love, respect, self-respect, integrity, friends, family, innocence – and traded it for selfishness, insecurity, fear, regret, pain, agony, anguish, loss and time that will never be recovered. Now, I am forced to admit I cannot expect to be given what I drank away that once was mine – nor should I be enabled in regaining what I lost – without working for it. And I have the tools to begin the rebuilding process, courtesy of AA. So simple! But the work to apply those tools forces me to ask my higher power, on bent knees, for the strength, courage, honesty, discipline, integrity and selflessness to earn back – not demand nor expect them to be handed to me – what I have lost. And, if I do the job right, I may get back more than I lost. Today, I accept I must remake myself and, with the program, I’ve got the tools to do it. All that remains is my choice to pick them up and put them to use. Today, I pick them up and begin the rebuilding process. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE TENTH PROMISE

We will instinctively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.

~Big Book ~

By using such slogans as “Easy Does It,” “One Day at a Time,” “Together We Can Do What I Can’t,” we find solutions for problems that seemed unsolvable before. By working the Steps, we learn to face up to and solve the problems of everyday living that used to cause us to seek relief in our addictions.

We no longer have doubts about our ability to do for ourselves what we once expected others to do for us. If we don’t know the answers, we know we can find them by asking the advice of fellow members who have faced the same problems.

The instincts which once compelled us toward our addiction have been redirected toward solving problems during recovery. We are confident that there are solutions to all problems, including some we haven’t faced yet. We no longer have to dodge what we used to feel were certain failures.

I use the tools built by those who have already experienced the problems I am facing for the first time.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is?

~ Frank Scully ~

From the day we are born, our lives are risky. We may be intimidated by a task or a challenge before us. Working on some of the Twelve Steps is a risk. When we face these challenges, we can draw courage from looking at other risks we have taken and perhaps even enjoyed. For instance, most sports are exciting and thrilling because they play on the possibility of winning or losing. Falling in love is a risk. Climbing a mountain is a risk. Building something with our hands is a risk. Yet we enjoy the pleasure of stepping Into these risks. Taking a risk makes us feel alive.

When we think about these enjoyable adventures, where risks add to the excitement, we can use that feeling as a model for approaching the risks that we avoid. Perhaps we need to talk to our wife or partner about something that is hard to say. Perhaps we need to make amends to someone for a past wrong and we don’t know how we will be received. Perhaps our greatest challenge is to subdue our own will for something and give it over to the care of our Higher Power.

Today I will recall the risks that make me feel alive and move forward with those things I have been avoiding.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

No one can tell you which choices to make. We can only show you by good example.

~ Jan Pishok ~

We are attracted to men and women who share their wisdom and their hope freely, to people whose behavior reflects thoughtfulness of others. We recognize the love that radiates from some people as they enter a room or speak to others. We are nil creating examples for others in every move we make.

One of the first principles we learned about recovery was that this is a program of “attraction rather than promotion.” Though we may not have understood the meaning initially, we now appreciate how valuable that principle is. None of us like to be told what to do. Even when we ask for advice, we seldom really want it. But we can willingly follow the example someone sets, particularly 11 the outcome was successful. Let’s learn from the good example of others. Let’s be good examples as well

I am someone’s example for healthy behavior today. I won’t steer anyone wrong.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can pray again

I used to dislike praying. Out of anger and fear I could hardly imagine a higher power. I was afraid of prayer’s silence, afraid to be alone with my thoughts and feelings. Prayer seemed mysterious and tied up with religion. I don’t think I believed in it.

In recovery, all this has changed. I see my higher power as accepting and caring. The fear of silence and solitude has been lifted. Slowly, through doubting and testing, I have come to believe in prayer. It is simple, personal, and powerful. For my return to prayer, I am grateful.

I will set a time and talk with my higher power today.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

One of the hardest things to find in life is fun people.
Far too few appear and seemingly fewer survive adulthood.

~ Sr. Karol A. Jankowski ~

Fun is something we all deserve to have a lot of. In fact, we can never have enough honest, down- to-earth fun. Nothing brightens our days like a deep belly laugh with a playful friend. What a relief to feel safe and accepted enough to throw our heads back and laugh.

Fun and laughter are life’s natural antidotes for stress and worry. Some days we seem to be affected with a dreadful condition called Chronic Seriousness. Chronic Seriousness spreads gloom and depression and paints our days into a black, cheerless corner. How tiring to be faced by this darkness in ourselves and others.

Today, our challenge is to be fun people and trust our right to laugh, play, and feel good. Fun and laughter are contagious. The more we open ourselves up to good humor, the more we find our family, friends, and co-workers having fun right along with us.

Today let me laugh, play, and be willing to have a good time.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I have always delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start…

~ Joseph Priestley ~

Just as you begin your day washing yesterday’s residue from your body, so too is it vitally important to begin each new day with a similar cleansing of your mind and spirit. That is because your mind and spirit can become warehouses for stored up fears, doubts, insecurities, anger, stress, and pain.

The beginning of the day presents an ideal time to en-gage in physical, mental, and spiritual cleansing so you can start anew, cleansed, and centered. In the same amount of time as it takes to shower, you can connect with your Higher Power and use the tools of the recovery program to strengthen your spirit.

Each morning set aside time to engage in stillness, quiet reflection, meditation, and prayer. Imagine the life you wish to experience and summon the strength of your convictions to make what you have imagined come true. Ask your Higher Power to bless the image you have created and to give you the power to hold onto that image throughout the day. Through regular cleansing of your mind and spirit, you can approach each day filled with energy, poise, and confidence.

I begin the day connecting with my Higher Power. My Higher Power will help cleanse my soul and free my spirit.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new.

~ Ursula K. Leguin ~

In the first phases of a relationship, everything is new and exciting. It seems as though nothing could ever go wrong.

Yet as we move out of this “honeymoon” phase of the relationship, problems begin. Suddenly we notice things about the other person that bother us. We seem to have more disagreements and more difficulties that take longer to solve. We may even silently choose corners, put up walls, and back away from each other.

It’s easy at this stage to want to end the relationship. But now is when the outcome of the relationship is most critical. If we run away from renewing our love and rebuilding the foundations of trust and faith in each other, we will deprive our love of its nourishment for growth. Love takes constant work and needs plenty of patience. Each day can reveal a new layer of love; each stage in a relationship moves us to a new plateau. But only if we are willing.

I can look at my relationships and see the potential for growth. Help me renew my feelings of love through faith.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Holding on and letting go

We had a great deal of tenacity, except that we were holding on to destructive behaviors and attitudes: resentments and self-pity, drugs and other bad habits.

We must reassign this tenacity to what is realistic and what sustains us in life, then hold on carefully (like holding a newborn kitten).

Am I holding on to more of the good things?

Higher Power, help me let go of the fear that keeps me from letting go of my defects.

The good things I will hold on to today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Things are in the saddle, And ride mankind.

~ RALPH WALDO EMERSON ~

Newcomer

I have a life, not just this program. Work deadlines, family obligations, bills, things I have to get done. I have a lot of responsibility, and it isn’t going to go away just because I’m in recovery. And now I have all these new things I’m supposed to do: meetings, phone calls, literature, Steps. I desperately need some time off to catch up with my real life.

Sponsor

When I was active in my disease, time was my enemy. Sometimes I let obligations slide until a situation felt desperate. Sometimes I threw myself into my duties, worked without stopping, then burned out. Recovery offers me a simple way to deal with responsibilities: one day at a time.

Maintaining recovery by attending a meeting, making a call, and reading literature—things we do to stay sober today—takes less time than the hours we spent pursuing our addictions, indulging in them, being slowed down or stopped by them. Working on things consistently, even just a little each day, produces results in all areas of life. I no longer resent time for recovery, any more than I resent the need for food and sleep. When we take time to recharge our batteries, we renew energy for the chores of our lives, become more focused and productive. In this way, surprisingly, our recovery actually gives us time.

Nothing’s so urgent that I can’t sit through a meeting, talk to my sponsor, or take a moment to pray. As I nourish my recovering self, I have more to offer work and relationships. Today, time is on my side.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Few of us who are successfully working the AA Program have failed to notice the almost immediate influence our sobriety has brought about, not only in our homes and jobs, but in the community as well.

Some of us who a short time ago stood before the judge and got the usual “ten dollars or ten days,” are now frequently closeted in the Judge’s Chambers at his invitation to assist him in his handling of the alcoholic problem.

We know what we were, we know what we are, now let us be what we can be.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) More will be Revealed

2) If you are having trouble believing in a power greater than yourself, just try believing in a power other than yourself.

3) When what one needs to do becomes what one wants to do, change becomes simple.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Do the Right Thing

Help me, Higher Power, to get out of myself, to stop always thinking what I need. Show me the way I can be helpful to others and supply me with the strength to do the right thing.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

REGISTER JOY

The principle revelation of the Jesus Christ teaching is the omnipresence and availability of God, and the belief that God not only transcends His universe but is everywhere immanent in it—that He indwells in it.

If you really believe in the existence of God you should be happy and cheerful. God has all power, and God is good; so life must be good too.

Meet the world with a smile. You owe this to God, to your fellows, and above all else to yourself. If you go about with a face like an east wind what can you possibly expect to attract from this world? We all know people who carry a fixed, frozen mirthless, almost professional, smile. Such a smile is just a permanent wave in the face.

Smile, even if it takes a little effort, and even if it takes a little effort, and keep it up until it becomes spontaneous, as it will. In the graphic language of Hollywood, register joy, and hold it!

For ye shall go out with joy . . . (Isaiah 55:12)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

For Your Own Sake, Forgive

Holding resentment is like eating poison and then waiting for the other person to keel over.

~ Anonymous ~

As a massage therapist in a hospital, Irene was assigned to give physical therapy to a cancer patient who, according to the doctors’ prognosis, had but a short time to live. While Irene was treating Mrs. Harmon, she asked the elderly woman about the pain in her life. “My greatest sorrow is that I have not spoken to my sister in 20 years,” lamented Mrs. Harmon. When Irene encouraged the woman to talk about her long-held resentment, Mrs. Harmon burst into tears, reporting how hard it had been to hold a grudge against her sister, whom she truly loved. The two women embraced, and Mrs. Harmon reported that she felt relieved.

The following week when Irene returned to the hospital, she was surprised to find Mrs. Harmon dressed, wearing makeup, and looking significantly healthier. “Where are you going?” asked Irene.

“Home, darling,” Mrs. Harmon answered. “When they took me in for x-rays, they found no sign of cancer.”

When we hold on to anger, hurt, or resentment, we only hurt ourselves. By withholding love from another, we deny it to ourselves. If you keep someone in prison with your thoughts, you have to sit at their jail door to keep them from escaping, and thus become a prisoner yourself.

To free another is to free yourself. When you give the gift of release, your spirit is healed.

Lift all negativity; resentment, and sense of victimhood from my heart I want to recreate my relationships to reflect only love, honor, and healing.

I give freedom and I am free.

[majestyjo]

February 26

Step by Step

Today, understand we cannot take Step Seven of asking a higher power to “remove our shortcomings” without first surrendering completely to the Sixth Step of being “entirely ready.” If we cling onto some character defect such as fear, resentment, anger, self-pity or remorse, we probably have not been thoroughly honest in our Fourth Step of “a searching and fearless moral inventory …” Some – if not all – of those character defects likely triggered our drinking, at first abusively and eventually compulsively, and holding onto them even with an honest desire to let go of them may threaten the quality of our sobriety – maybe sobriety itself. An “honest desire” to surrender our defects, then, is not sufficient. Because the program is one of action, we must be active in releasing our defects and not taking them back. Our thoughts, feelings and actions of yesterday influence our subsequent tomorrows; thus, what we do today may well impact tomorrow, and a history of carrying from yesterday into tomorrow is one of self-destruction. Today, if we are mired in defects that we know contributed to our drinking, let’s review our Fourth to see if it wasn’t as “searching and fearless” as it should be. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE ELEVENTH PROMISE

We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

~Big Book ~

When we are new in recovery and survive a major problem or make progress, we try to explain it by saying we have been saved by coincidence. Then our new friends are quick to tell us that there are no coincidences in recovery, only miracles. God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

As we meditate on this Promise, we must practice patience, belief, and trust in our Higher Power. God always lets us know that miracles come in His time, not ours.

This promise tells us we must accept God’s help, not merely be resigned to it. We must let go of our problems personally and turn them over to God with faith.

When I drank or used, my higher power was the substance I was using. I seldom admitted it. The Eleventh Promise tells me I have found a Higher Power that can and will do great things for me in spite of myself.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

To remain whole, he twisted. To become straight, let yourself be bent. To become fall, be hollow.

~ LaoTzu ~

The first three Steps of our Twelve Step program make the ancient spiritual wisdom real in our lives. First we give in to the fact that we are powerless in a very real way in our lives. Then we open ourselves to the healing that comes not of our own making but from our Higher Power.

We live the paradox of spiritual development. Every day that we admit the ways in which we are powerless, and every day that we live in true humility, we become stronger, wiser men. Although we aren’t totally powerless, there are some things we can never control. Owning up to that truth makes us stronger. Having the respect that is inherent in humility makes us grow in wisdom.

Today I am grateful for the spiritual guidance I am learning in this program.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Nothing is real until you are close to it.

~ Joyce Wadler ~

Addiction kept us from being close to the people and the experiences in our lives. It’s not that we weren’t present, but our feelings, perceptions, and reactions lacked clarity and sincerity, because our vision was distorted by the chemical that consumed us.

Living free of mood-altering chemicals brings us much closer to the currents running through our lives. Without the cloud of alcohol or other drugs we see who our friends really are; we recognize what our experiences are trying to teach us.

What do we gain from being closer? Our awareness of the presence of a Higher Power is heightened. We come to believe that each encounter is by design. We don’t doubt that we have a particular investment in every experience. We trust that all is well. We know that God is in charge.

Living on the outskirts of life used to satisfy me; I didn’t know it could be different. Today I feel my involvement and cherish life.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can manage my anxiety and my addiction

My anxiety disorder kept getting worse. It got harder to go to the grocery store and harder even to drive my car. Eventually, I couldn’t leave my apartment and then I lost my job. To solve my psychiatric problem, I tried street drugs and alcohol. They didn’t help at all; in fact I developed a dual disorder.

Given both the addiction and the psychiatric illness, I learned to work a program of dual recovery. For me, this means I use the Twelve Steps for both illnesses. It means that I see a therapist regularly and attend an anxiety support group every week. Through the help of my combined recovery program and my higher power, I now have my anxiety in check and I am gratefully abstinent from alcohol or other drugs.

I will meditate on the advantages of using specific recovery programs for my specific illnesses.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Joy happens as we cease fighting everyone and everything and surrender to the good orderly direction of life.

~ Nancy Folsum ~

Living on the edge of depression and panic, we had little experience with joy. Our hearts were worn and battle-scarred, utterly unfamiliar with the peace that joy can bring.

Days and sometimes years into our recovery, we one day find ourselves sitting side by side with joy. What a new feeling. It’s solid, it’s peaceful. It has nothing to do with where we’re sitting or standing. It has nothing to do with what’s going on outside us, or with who said what to whom. It is a feeling too happy to be true, and joy is the only word that pops into our head to describe it.

Joy is the gravy of recovery, and it is beyond measure. Now that we are living in a healthy and life- filled way, there’s always a chance that joy will find its way into our day. In this knowledge we rejoice.

Today let me know that joy is the reward of persistently working my program of recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

It is impressive to see a person who has been battered by life in many ways… still striving to find the path to a more fulfilling existence, moved by the wisdom in knowing, “I am more than my problems.”

~ Nathaniel Branden ~

Naturalist Henry David Thoreau left behind the comforts of home to live in the woods and fulfill his basic needs in a Spartan-like existence. He explained, “I wanted to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and to see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.” Thoreau’s desire to experience life more fully has, for decades, provided a power of example to many. Each person in recovery—including you—is a power of ex-ample. Each is a role model for those who stumble into the program, for those who lose their way, and for those who struggle each day with courage and hope. Each has a story that started in tragedy and is continuing in triumph.

When you see yourself as a role model, you can view your progress. You can understand how your story can be inspirational to a newcomer.

I will serve as a source of inspiration to others. I will freely give of myself and my experiences to those in need.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself or herself. But the self is not something that one finds. It is something one creates.

~ Thomas Szasz ~

In the late sixties, people used drugs and politics to find themselves. The flower children advocated love, not war; they listened to hard rock and political ballads; they looked inward to find out who they were. Yet instead of finding themselves, many seemed to escape from themselves and life.

Many of us today look frantically for ways to discover who we are. We may dress differently or wear makeup. We may consult horoscopes or psychics to gain insight into our being. We may trace our family origins or isolate ourselves in cabin retreats to discover our roots and meaning.

Yet we are not the result of dress or psychic insight or family patterns. We are blank pages upon which we draw who we want to be. Just as an architect draws blueprints for a building, so must we draw blueprints for who we want to be. We are the creators, not the created. We are the artists. Now grab the pencils and let the sketching begin!

I have all the tools I need to create the very best me possible.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Learning to live

Just as we learn to walk or talk, we must learn to live, day by day. When we got clean and sober, we had to learn how to live all over again. (Judging by our past we had not done so well in this area.)

If our desire is strong enough, God will take our hand and lead us step by step, day by day, into our new life. In time we will become the loving, mature adults we could not be for so many years before.

Am I learning to live?

Higher Power, help me let go of my will and follow yours.

I will work on learning to live today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Freedom is nothing else but a chance to be better.

~ ALBERT CAMUS ~

Newcomer

This thing of having to go to meetings all the time—I feel as if I’m substituting a whole new addiction for the old one.

Sponsor

Like you, I depend on the tools of the program. I have habits (attending meetings, reading program literature, offering service, praying, meditating) that have replaced many habits of my actively addicted years. I wouldn’t want to have to live without my new habits. By maintaining our healthy sobriety, we are treating a disease, not acquiring another one.

When we were using, we were far from free. Substances and behaviors that threatened our lives and serenity were in charge. Today, once we choose to take the simple steps that support recovery and healing, we have lives in which we can make independent and worthy choices.

Today, I know the difference between healthful habits and addictions.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Frequently we are asked “Why waste your money on that guy? He’s a phony if ever I saw one.” We have all heard this and often it was true but after all, the monetary loss each month was way below our old whisky bills. Every once in a while the long shot does come in and the pay-off is tremendous.

It is simply a case of betting on people instead of horses. These bets on people can’t lose, for if the phony abuses your generosity, the fault is his, not yours and he is debited and you are credited by the Great Bookkeeper who has charge of the Treasury where “neither moth nor rust doth corrupt and where thieves do not break through and steal.”

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) GOD: Great Out Doors

2) In order for someone to “give” you a bad day, you have to take” it.

3) When you are being here now, you don’t have to cover up anything.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Run the Race

Help me this day, Higher Power, to run with patience the race that is set before me.
May neither opposition without nor discouragement within divert me from my progress in recovery.
Inspire in me strength of mind, willingness, and acceptance, that I may meet all fears and difficulties with courage, and may complete the tasks set before me today.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

PRIMING THE PUMP

An understanding faith is the life of prayer. It is a great mistake, however, to struggle to produce a lively faith within yourself. That can only end in failure. The thing to do is to act as though you had faith. Act out what you wish to demonstrate, and you will be expressing true faith. This is the right use of the will, scientifically understood.

Verily I say unto you, if ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou cast into the sea, it shall be done (Matthew 21:21).

This statement of Jesus is perhaps the most tremendous spiritual pronouncement ever made, Jesus knew the law of faith, and proved it many times. We shall move mountains when we are willing to believe we can, and then not only will mountains be moved, but the whole planet will be redeemed and re-formed according to the Pattern in the Mount.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Who’s the Phony?

Be humble before God, but great in Him.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

An interviewer asked a number of movie executives, “What is your greatest fear?” Over 80 percent of these wealthy, powerful, and successful people answered, “I fear that if people knew who I really am, they would discover I am a phony and that I don’t really know what I am doing.” The irony of this common fear is that these people are among the most respected in their industry—not for fooling people, but for the real achievements they have engineered. So, indeed, each is a phony—but the phony one is not the successful business person; it is the one who believes, “I am a phony.”

To be successful in any endeavor, we must allow Spirit to work through us. There is a higher power that will flow through us if we allow it. Rarely do great artists claim credit for their own achievements. When we are at our best, we become an open channel through which Spirit can express. In the Hindu tradition, Krishna is the incarnation of God who gingerly plays the flute that makes all the maidens swoon. God is the player, and we are the flute.

The belief system of the ego, demonstrated by the movie executives’ responses, is the inverse of the truth. We are phony in our unworthiness and genuine in our strength.

Let me not identify with smallness, but the greatness in which You created me.

I cannot fail because Spirit lives in me, through me, as me.