Even More Recovery Readings

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April 7

Step by Step

“Each group has but one primary purpose – to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.” – The Fifth Tradition

Today, ask if I am a positive contributor to my home group’s mission as commanded in the Fifth Tradition, or if I fail and even bring dissension and division to my group. There is little to interpret in the Third Tradition that the only requirement of an individual member is “a desire to stop drinking.” Carrying that into the Fifth Tradition, I need to work on any hidden prejudices against individuals to the point that I impose my own “requirements” on them. Have I ever been guilty of talking critically or gossiping about a member because of his gender, religion, socioeconomic class, sexual orientation or gone so far as to doubt or challenge his claim to length of sobriety or moral inventory? If I have, I have breached the Fifth Tradition and, in so doing, I have perverted the Steps and Traditions into something they are not intended to be. Today, I will work with and not against and do what is required – “carry (the) message to the alcoholic who still suffers.” And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SEXUALITY

Our sex powers were God-given and therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly nor to be despised and loathed.

~ Alcoholics Anonymous ~

What comes from our higher power is to be honoured and treated with respect. Our sexuality has unlimited potential for good. We have so often turned this power in on ourselves and been destroyed by it, or allowed it to destroy others.

The Steps let us change our feelings our feelings about sex so that these new feelings can encourage wholesome relationships. When we walk with our Higher Power, our self-will doesn’t run riot over our sex lives. Our spiritual awakening washes over all our relationships, even our most tender and personal.

We gain a new sense of respect. We learn we can love deeply. We find that sexuality is a powerful, life-giving force that enriches, bonds, and commits us to a special person. We no longer have to face remorse and guilt from uncontrolled desires.

May I rediscover the joy in my God-given sexuality by treating myself and others with honor and respect.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unaware.

~ Hebrews 13:2 ~

Recovery is a very democratic thing. No matter how far down a man has fallen, no matter how bad his life choices have been or how much he has given up for his addiction and codependency, he deserves our basic human respect. We all are created in the image of God. There is something of God within everyone.

When we go to our meetings, we meet many kinds of people. Some of them we have more in common with than others. Some of them we will feel closer to than others. But we are all creatures of the universe and we are all equally loved by God. We may feel critical of someone’s behavior, but ultimately we are called to respect everyone as fellow human beings seeking a path through life.

Today I accept the love of God and pledge to show respect to everyone I meet.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We are likely to blunder from one crisis to another if we haven’t learned to act responsibly.

~ Jan Pishok ~

Before we got clean and sober, we lived in perpetual crisis. Few situations unfolded exactly as we planned. We generally overreacted, and repeated crises were born. But no more, as long as we utilize the principles of this program. Acting responsibly means being in charge of our thoughts and our attitudes, which will avert the crises.

Surely adult women like us don’t have a problem being responsible! But alas, that’s not always the case. In years past, we seldom did the right thing. Now we may flirt with disaster because we let the addict loose in our heads. The tools we’ve learned from our sisters in this program can get us back on track, but we have to want to steer the right course. No one plucks thoughts from our mind or pushes ones in that we don’t want. We’re in charge, so let’s accept the challenge.

Acting responsibly is no harder than I choose to make it today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am learning it’s OK to cry

I’m not sure what’s going on with me. I know I’ve been blue for a while now, but I have always felt better sooner or later. These days, when my mood picks up, it is short lived. Soon, I’m weeping again. I’m afraid, and I feel like I’m losing control.

I called my therapist about this again and got some reassurance. I need to keep reminding myself of her message: It’s OK to cry. It’s part of healing. While it can be frightening to feel so deeply and to feel such deep pain, the feeling alone won’t hurt me.

I will make a flash card that reads, “It’s OK to cry and feel the pain.”

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

If you are willing to open yourself to the miracles of each day, each day toill be a miracle.

~ Katherine L. ~

The morning light trips into the room and gently warms us. Slowly, we return from the world of dreams and begin a new day. How can we doubt that there is a Power greater than ourselves? Each day, there are a multitude of little miracles that remind us — if we take the time to notice.

During recovery we learn to wrap our minds around the idea of a Higher Power. It truly is an awakening, a “coming to,” after years of fog and blackouts. Our grandiose, self-centered life was like a dream. Then sobriety, a gift from God, slowly crept into our world. Very much like waking from sleep, we began to open our eyes, see the real world, and open ourselves to the joys and opportunities that awaited.

Now that we have been awakened, we need to keep our eyes open, to listen to the direction and guidance from this Power greater than ourselves. The answers are there if we’re willing to stop, look, and listen. We feel these answers every day.

Today help me look at the miracles around me, especially in Twelve Step meetings.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Solitary shots should be ignored, but when they come from several directions, it’s time to pay attention. As someone once said, “If one calls you a donkey, ignore him. If two call you a donkey, check for hoof prints. If three call you a donkey, get a saddle

~ Marshall Shelley ~

You may have grown up in a home where a parent frequently said, “You’re stupid” or “You’ll never amount to anything.” But did every single person in your life—all of your family members, your teachers, your neighbors, and your friends—say the same things? Chances are the negative messages came from one or two sources.

Such negative statements, especially from people whose acceptance and approval are important to you, can have a lasting impact. But remember, such statements do not define who you are unless you let them. Chances are those saying such things have low self-esteem and feel more comfortable by criticizing you than by taking a look in the mirror.

Focus on doing things to help you feel better about yourself. Work toward strengthening a healthy level of self-esteem so you are better able to prevent outside influences from shaping or dictating how you feel.

I will not adopt negative messages. I will not give them the power to define who I am or to destroy who I am becoming.

Each morning the day lies like a fresh shirt on our bed.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I have to laugh at the times I’ve knocked myself out over a tough spot only to find out afterwards there was an easier way through.

~ Robert Franklin Leslie ~

We receive messages throughout the day that tell us ways of doing things. The door to the store says “pull.” The red light tells us not to drive through the intersection. The cereal box says “lift tab and open.” Our car gas gauge tells us “empty.” With these messages, we are given the guidance on which to base our decisions.

We can choose not to pull the door. Then we’ll spend a lot of time and energy pushing until we finally read the sign. All that effort expended, just because we couldn’t stop to get some guidance!

The Twelve Steps offer guidance for an easier way through life. We don’t have to knock ourselves out over these Steps; all we have to do is follow the direction they give us.

How can I use the Steps to make my life easier?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Turning it over

It is true that if we turn our wills and our lives over to God, our problems will be lifted. It is easier to speak this truth than to live it.

Looking back, we see that following our own will has caused serious problems in our lives. Let’s give this truth a chance. Let’s pray, meditate, listen, and believe.

Am I turning it over?

God, help me to stop holding on so tight and to have faith.

Today I will turn my will over to God by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Surrender sooner.

~ SAYING HEARD AT MEETINGS ~

Newcomer

I’ve been working so hard to do everything I’m supposed to, in recovery and in the “real” world. But something in me wants to slow down, cry, and scream, maybe even collapse. The timing couldn’t be less convenient. I should have waited to come into recovery.

Sponsor

How much choice do we really have about timing, about when we enter recovery? Hitting bottom is a spiritual crisis; like any other crisis, we have to address it when it occurs. We don’t get to negotiate the terms. Similarly, we don’t get to choose the nature or timing of the emotions we experience. We can stop our tears, but not our grief. If we don’t try to resist or block feelings, they flow through us surprisingly quickly.

Falling down doesn’t mean we’ll never get up again. We may need to let some things fall apart before we can move on. Those of us who were brought up to believe that we should be able to manage several things simultaneously, ignore our personal needs, and come through every crisis with a smile may have trouble letting go of our old ideas. It’s okay to be imperfect in our recovery process. The sooner we let go, the better.

Today, I accept my Higher Power’s timetable for me.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Many of us, when we get over the Big Trouble, whiskey, sit back complacently and begin to enjoy our sobriety.

To work the Program successfully, we must remember that whiskey is only the first. There are many other conflicts ahead and we must press on to successive victories over our many character defects to achieve a new way of living.

The conflict will never end until you arrive at perfection, or still more probably, the grave.

When you began to rest complacently on your oars, you will find your boat is drifting downstream.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) My expectations are inversely proportional to my serenity.

2) We are all special cases.

3) HOPE: Hang On, Peace Exists.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Seventh Step Prayer

My Creator, I am now willing that You should have all of me, good and bad.
I pray that You now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to You and my fellows.
Grant me strength, as I go out from here to do Your bidding.
Amen.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

TEMPLE OF SOLOMON – SILVER

Next comes the silver. This stands for greed of money or money’s worth, for material objects that can be bought, and even for riches themselves. Or it may be that the offender is not interested in riches themselves but in their ability to give him honor in the eyes of the world. He wants to be considered important and to have adulation or applause. Often he wants to be a “leader,” not because he has a message to give but to be important. He is the victim of egotism. Now this is a base and ignoble sin; an insurmountable barrier across the spiritual path.

For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while coveted after, they have erred from faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows (1 Timothy 6:10)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Get Real

In a dream I saw myself as a great and colorful butterfly; now I am not sure if I am Chuang-Tsu dreaming I was a butterfly, or a butterfly dreaming I am Chuang-Tsu.

~ Chuang-Tsu, Chinese Patriarch ~

Over the past decade, the word real has come into vogue. Coca- Cola insists that it is “the real thing.” Our friends tell us to “get real.” Before entering into business ventures, we do a “reality check.” We can’t help avoiding the questions, “What is real?” and “Who is the real me?”

At the completion of nearly every one of my retreat programs, someone wistfully notes, “Too bad we have to go back to the real world now.”

I always respond by saying, “This is the real world. The world of loving, honest communication and genuine caring reflects our true identity much more than the world we usually call ‘real.’”

What world is real to you? The world that most people consider real is fraught with illusions. Money, fame, power, sex, and material security do not offer true reward and substance, they dissolve as soon as the tiniest light is shed on them. While the “real world” tells us that these commodities are worth living and dying for, those who have them are often desperate for love, relationships, communication, community, and peace of mind.

The real world is the world of kindness, caring, vision, and service. All of these qualities are attributes of our divine nature. As children of God, we can only be what God is, and that is everything that is good. We are born of light, and we return to the light. To live in light is to live in the real world.

Show me the real world. Let me not forget my nature and my origin.

I live in the real world of love.

[majestyjo]

April 8

Step by Step

Today, absolute and unquestionable faith in a higher power that He will give me what I need when He, not I, decides when I should receive. I can reach into my yesterdays to cement my faith that, in my darkest days, I saw no hope but was delivered from active alcoholism and the damage to others. But it was only when I “admitted (I am) powerless” and “came to believe” that I began to emerge from the alcoholic fog and only when I reached the point when I was able to begin to live as an alcoholic in recovery. Today, sober, if I am anxious, angry, frustrated or resentful that I do not have what I think I deserve or need, let me be reminded that it was only when I was taken to the point of hopelessness that my higher power delivered me. And in recovery I’ve learned to be careful not to get what I wish for: I might get it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

WISDOM

He who would distinguish the true from the false must have an adequate idea of what is true and false.

~ Spinoza~

Wisdom is really no more than common sense. It will help us make the right choices in our attitudes and behavior. That way we can continue our spiritual progress.

Sometimes, wisdom is simple willingness to accept with faith the things we don’t know from personal experience. We must receive, with an open mind, the messages of those who have lived through the problems we are facing for the first time.

We need to look for and listen to the wisdom in others. If we do, we will gain confidence in our own ability to tell the true from the false. We will begin to practice the principles of our recovery program in all parts of our lives.

Wisdom is earned. Wisdom is precious. The wise need simply to stand in silence for their wisdom to reveal itself. Let me learn wisdom.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

To “be” means to be related.

~ Alfred Korzybski ~

In our using and codependent days, loneliness was ever-present. We could be with a crowd but we felt alienated and alone. Many of us grew up in families where no one really knew how to feel close. We often longed for a closer connection with our fathers. As adult men we learned to be self-sufficient, and we thought it was always superior to be able to do something without help. If we got help to accomplish something, it was somehow not quite as good as if we did it alone.

Now we are part of a fellowship with other men and women who know what it’s like to be where we have been; they are on the same journey. We may have very different lives in some ways, but we have our common goal: to become better people. The true basis for our humanity, the real fulfillment of our potential, is in relationship with others. We no longer have to be locked in our isolated world. Through our friendships and our spiritual path we are free to be ourselves.

Today I am grateful for my friends.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Silence should be used sparingly. But used, nonetheless.

~ Stephanie Ericsson ~

When we want to control another’s actions, being quiet is difficult. Our ego screams to take charge! When we bite our tongue instead, remembering the Serenity Prayer, we are spared an unnecessary confrontation. Occasionally quieting our mouth, if not our mind, promises big payoffs in our relationships with others.

Silence wears many guises, however. We have all experienced the punishing silent treatment from lovers or friends. And our attempts to engage others in conversation are occasionally met with a silence that confuses us. Another’s quietness may not be easily understood, but we must accept it.

Silence, particularly our own, is requisite to receiving guidance from our Higher Power. Being silent is often the most valuable action we can take.

I will consider being silent each time an opportunity to respond offers itself today. Doing the right thing may well mean doing and saying nothing.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I must stay free of all addictive substances

I remember when I finally could admit I had a dual disorder – but was still afraid to stop using alcohol and street drugs. It meant I would have to go through withdrawal. It meant I couldn’t manage my emotions the way I used to. Even though it was my choice, I felt defenceless and angry.

Fortunately, I remembered to call my psychiatrist and get some support. First, he reassured me that if I needed it, he would help me weather withdrawal. Then he said he would help me find a Twelve Step meeting where I felt comfortable. He emphasized that abstinence is so important to recovery from a dual disorder: if I didn’t stop using, I could relapse to my addiction and perhaps to my psychiatric disorder as well. If I used while taking medication, I could cause serious medical problems. His knowledge and care helped me to remain stable by getting sober and staying sober.

I will find a Twelve Step meeting to attend today.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Peace, peace is what I seek, and public calm;
Endless extinction of unhappy hates.

~ Matthew Arnold ~

Anger is healthy, telling us something’s wrong with our world. But hate is anger out of control. When we hate, we can’t think clearly. All our attention is focused on the feelings and needs of the moment. The “big picture” is forgotten. All our senses are turned inward to our most primitive feelings and the needs of the moment. We’re blind to the pain of others and deaf to the words of others. Our minds can’t work well; messages are going out, but none are coming in. Hate is a dangerous state of being for us; we’re likely to lash out and say or do things that hurt another person. Some of these things we’ll regret later, and grieve over. Hate hurts others, and it hurts us too.

With our recovery program, we can learn to avoid the frustration and feelings of impotence that bring on hate. Prayer and meditation help the most. Contacting our Higher Power can help cool the feelings and bring peace and serenity. With His help, hate doesn’t have to keep burning in us, endangering other people and our own recovery. We can vent our anger honestly when it is appropriate. With His help, we can find calm and serenity.

Today help me understand my feelings. Help me keep anger small and tame, and avoid the fires of hatred.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The happiness of the next twenty-four hours depends upon our ability, on waking, to pick it up.

~ Walter Benjamin ~

At times you may need to look back and reflect upon your actions and behaviors of the past, or look ahead so you can develop goals for the future. But the only place where you truly exist is in the here and now.

To fully appreciate each day, begin by having few expectations. While it is important to consider what you need to do at work or at home, and to plan ahead to fulfill certain projects or responsibilities, strive to be flexible about how you expect the day to go. This will help alleviate disappointment from unmet expectations and make you more open to new discoveries.

Start your day with a prayer—one of thankfulness for the day’s beauty, freshness, and promise. Do what needs to be done to prepare for your day. Then head out the door in a positive frame of mind. Take on the day as if it were your last on earth. Embrace it fully. Live it fully. What lies ahead of you is a gift for you to unwrap and enjoy.

I will begin the day with a positive attitude and with an openness to experience all that lies ahead.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Each one of us has walked through storm and fled the wolves along the road; but here the hearth is wide and warm, and for this shelter and this light accept, O Lord, our thanks tonight.

~ Sara Teasdale ~

We made it through another day. Sometimes we may feel relief at this statement, other times disappointment, still other times peace.

Tonight we can be grateful for this day. This doesn’t mean just giving thanks or recognition for getting something we wanted. Being grateful means recognizing all the events and the people who came our way. It means seeing through disappointments or pain in order to gain understanding of its meaning in our lives. It means trusting everything that happened was given by our Higher Power. We can trust there was a reason for it all.
Giving thanks begins now. We can replay today’s events like a tape – watching, listening, and feeling. And at the end of the tape, we can thank our Higher Power for our day, for the people in it, and for the knowledge and experience we gained.

Thank you, Higher Power, for this day. I trust everything in my life today was a gift from You.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Keeping it simple

Keep it simple. What seems complex in our minds may not be complex in reality. We may not really be in the mess we think we are in. Serenity is available today if we accept today as it is, setting aside both yesterday and tomorrow. If we do what we need to do today, we will be in harmony and at peace.

What we need to be doing “out there” is right here, right now; it is as close as our spouse, children, job, and fellows in recovery. Am I keeping it simple?

Higher Power, help me let go of everything that interferes with simply doing what I need to be doing right now.

I will simplify my life today by tending to what is mine to do, right here, right now by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Never take anything for granted.

~ BENJAMIN DISRAELI ~

Newcomer

What is a “dry drunk”?

Sponsor

This expression may have first sprung up in AA. It’s used to describe one of us who is abstaining from the use of alcohol but isn’t thinking or behaving in a way that is sober. If we’re full of self-will, if we constantly blame and rage at others, if we’re controlled by our fears and resentments, we are prob-ably “on a dry drunk.” This expression might also be used to describe those of us with addictions other than alcohol when our lives are not sober. Our addictions are a package deal: certain attitudes and behaviors come with the compulsion to numb ourselves with particular substances or acts.

A “dry drunk” sometimes focuses on others and their addictive problems. Gossip, blame, argument, manipulative behavior, obsessive worrying, neglect of responsibilities— these are some common “dry drunk” behaviors. We may not be abusing a substance, but our attitudes and behavior qualify us as “dry drunks.”

Today, my participation in this program helps me to maintain physical, mental, and spiritual recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Look back, my friend, on the interminable nights of sweating, shaking, pacing the floor, praying for the dawn, yet dreading what the day would ring. That stretch in the “can” when “every day was like a year, a year whose days were long.” Days that lasted a lifetime and nights that lasted an eternity.

Those days and nights are gone, through the Grace of God, and now there are not enough hours in each day, not enough nights in each week and the span of life seems insufficient to accomplish the goals we have set for ourselves.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Action Not Distraction

2) Forgiveness detoxifies.

3) You can’t be grateful and hateful at the same time because you can’t serve two masters.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Eighth Step Prayer

Higher Power, I ask Your help in making my list of all those I have harmed.
I will take responsibility for my mistakes, and be forgiving to others just as You are forgiving to me.
Grant me the willingness to begin my restitution.
This I pray.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE TEMPLE OF SOLOMON

IVORY, APES, AND PEAthingyS

Then comes the ivory. This stands for undue attachment to a particular textbook, or a particular church or other organization. It is a mistaken loyalty. It is an unselfish error, but a deadly one. Any religious teacher or writer, however eminent any church or center, however much beloved, is still but a means to an end. The end itself is spiritual growth.

Recognize with gratitude all the help you receive from any source, but remember that your loyalty is due to God, through your own spiritual development. You must feel free at any time to go wherever you get the most help, irrespective of personal considerations.

The ape stands for bodily temptations such as sensuality, addiction to drink, drugs and so forth. These things are so obvious that the victim cannot deceive himself about them, so that at least he knows where he stands. They can, of course, be overcome by systematic prayer.

The peathingy stands for vanity. Vanity may take the form of intellectual pride, or of a snobbish attitude, or the desire to stand in with what is fashionable and powerful. It also includes spiritual pride on the part of those who really are in Truth, and this is worse than any of the other forms.

But thou, O man f God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness (1 Timothy 6:11)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

How Much Do You Want It?

Thy strength shall be according to the measure of thy desire.

~ Arab proverb ~

A young man came to a guru and asked him what he would need to do to become enlightened. The master took the student to a lake and pushed his head under water for a long time. Finally, the man became desperate for air and forced his way to the surface, shouting, “Are you trying to kill me?”

The guru calmly replied, “When you want God as much as you wanted air, you will find enlightenment.”

While this world seems to be a place of haphazard results, each of us is getting exactly what we are asking for at any given moment. If we truly want freedom, we shall find it, and if we’re not ready, so shall we remain bound.

If you seem stuck in any situation that is less than fulfilling, ask yourself if you are receiving any perceived benefits from staying where you are. While no one would reasonably choose illness, the subconscious perceives many hidden benefits: it gets us out of work, we get sympathy, we do not have to face the issues in our life that trouble us, we may be receiving some kind of monetary reward for our disability, and on and on. While no one would consciously admit to choosing illness, on some level we do.

Many people complain about their dysfunctional relationships, yet staying in them often seems to outweigh the benefits of leaving. One thing is for sure: The moment leaving becomes more attractive, staying will not have its way. We are free to choose, and we always are.
Place within my breast the burning desire for You alone: You are all I want, and You are all I shall have.

I am determined to have my dreams come true.

[majestyjo]

April 9

Step by Step

Today, experience freedom from resentments and feel relief from the weight of carrying them. Focus today primarily on the one character defect that can be as catastrophic as alcohol, sometimes moreso. If we can be resentment-free for just one day, we may learn that continuing to harbor grudges is not worth their weight from the relief and freedom that come when we let them go – and not take them back. Today, ask our higher power that we feel freedom from resentments and all their residual garbage – anger, isolation, revenge. For these 24 Hours, a resentment-free zone. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERVING

Serenity or piece of mind is accomplished by very few people in the world. True happiness will come to the person who seeks and finds how to serve others.

~ Anonymous ~

We are overjoyed that our giving and sharing is called volunteering. If, in carrying the message of hope, we are volunteers, we are happy to be among those who are volunteers in its purest form. We welcome a chance to serve.

There are no honor rolls, awards, money, or trophies. We give for the pure joy of helping. Our greatest rewards come in the form of a firm handshake or a hug from someone to whom we’ve given. Sometimes it’s the gratitude in the eyes of a family member. That is enough.

I want to practice the advice not to seek glory for kindness I perform. I can never be happy if I depend on material rewards for what I have given.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The coining to consciousness is not a discovery of some new thing it is a long and painful return to that which has always been.

~ Helen Luke ~

When a few guys in Ohio first developed the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, they didn’t just sit down to devise a way to help alcoholics. The Steps were born out of the pain and desperation of men in the grips of a disease that seemed hopeless and terminal. By trial and error they wrestled with this grip of addiction, slowly uncovering an approach that was helping them to stay sober. It was only after awakening in their new life of sobriety that they started to define and write down the steps they had taken.

In some ways, to reach our awakening we all must pass through the same process of pain and challenge that those men in Ohio did. No life is free of pain. The best of us take our pain and seek to use it as a learning tool. We ask how we can make something positive out of our distress. We take stock of where we are and accept it as our starting point for moving forward. When we awaken to consciousness through the Twelve Steps, it is a unique and personal story, and yet it is a universal human story.

Today I give thanks for my growing consciousness.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Two new beings are brought forth during child-birth: a newborn and a mother.

~ Anne Marie Nelson ~

Whether or not we have given birth to a child, we can certainly appreciate the miracle. The opportunity that we now have to give birth to a new self through recovery is comparable.

It is empowering to realize that we can create, or rather re-create, ourselves through the help of this detailed, yet simple program. Who could have imagined that we, while in the midst of a chaotic, drug-infested world, were capable of taking on a new persona, becoming a new woman?

But here we are, charting a new course for our lives. Just as women need and deserve assistance in childbirth, we can rely on the help and guidance of other women who, like us, seek to sustain their rebirth. Together we will bring new women into this world, women who are eager to make a healthy difference in the lives of others.

I have the tools to create whoever I want to be. I am an artist at work.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am grateful for my life

I was married. We had a child. I was successful at my job. I felt fulfilled. But then I developed serious mental health problems and addictions. It wasn’t long after I started to recover from my dual disorder that my wife and I got divorced.

I don’t know how I’ve managed these life changes, but I now have my feet on solid ground. And I only know that regularly I have called on my higher power, and regularly I have called on the combined experience, strength, and hope of my helpers in my Twelve Step and support groups. For giving me hope, for saving my life, I am deeply grateful to them all.

Today I will work Step Twelve and carry the message of dual recovery with gratitude and humility.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Seize the day!

~ Horace ~

During active addiction, everything was going to happen “tomorrow.” We’d give up our addiction, get a good job, make up with our families and friends, call someone for help, go to that meeting, get a new apartment, become honest and decent and proud, learn a new trade, find a better life…tomorrow. For today, we’d do the same old things in the same old way.

Now we know today is all we have: the past is over and tomorrow may never come. All we can count on, all we can control, is just one day: today.

But what a world is contained in that one day! We can be abstinent for one day. We can be the best person possible for one day. We can be loving and giving and caring for one day.

In this one day, we can stop to smell the roses and really see the wonders around us. We can give thanks to our Higher Power for the beauty in the world. We can reach out to a newcomer and find support with our sponsor. In this one day, we can be all we ever dreamed we’d be.

Today let me be grateful for all I have, and be the best “me” possible.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The little reed, bending to the force of the wind, soon stood upright again when the storm had passed over.

~ Aesop ~

Plants flourish in a garden that receives the right amount of sunlight and water, as well as a well-balanced soil. Manure and compost can be excellent fertilizers, although it is ironic that something so repellent is vital to sustaining life. The same holds true with misfortunes, failures, and disappointments. Such things are as beneficial to you as manure and compost are to a garden. They facilitate the growth of positive things. Fortune can arise out of misfortune, success can rise up from failure, and fulfillment can be more fully appreciated through the experience provided by disappointment.

In Chinese language the symbol for the word crisis de-notes a duality: “a moment of danger and of opportunity.” This symbol conveys that every crisis can be viewed as both an enemy—a threat to your vital resources—and an ally—an experience that challenges you to make change.

Whenever you feel intimidated by any of life’s crises, accept the challenge. Greet it like a reed in the wind. Bend through the adversity until it has passed. Then stand up-right once again, a stronger person for the experience.

I will accept the challenges during times of adversity so I may weather them and grow stronger in the process.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We struggle after ideas. We read this book and that, and go from place to place … instead of pausing to make our own the few great but profoundly simple laws and truths of the spirit.

~ Dr. Horatio Dresser ~

Right now, all we have to remember is that the program teaches us many slogans: Easy Does It, Keep It Simple, Let Go and Let God, Live and Let Live. These slogans are more than simple statements. They are truths for our spiritual well-being.

Today may have been a day of intense activity. We may have worked at a frantic pace, but felt we accomplished little. We may then have rushed home to eat a quick meal only to rush somewhere else.

Now is the time to slow down, to stop our frantic pace, if only for a few minutes. We can breathe deeply, let go of all the worries and tensions of the day, then think of a slogan. We can picture how simple it is, yet how truthful its meaning. Now is the time to rest and feel some serenity.

What is my favorite slogan? How can this slogan help me relax tonight?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Rewriting the program

People who abuse mood-altering chemicals fall into three categories with respect to the Twelve Step program: those who neglect the program entirely, those who try to put the program right, and those who want the pro-gram to put them right. Needless to say, those in the first two categories do them-selves little good.

If we expect to recover strictly on our own or feel the need to rewrite the Steps, arrogance and self-centeredness will block us every time. But when we accept the fact that something bigger than us can help, we are well on the road to recovery.

Am I living the program as prescribed?

Higher Power, help me believe that if I can’t, you can, and if I let you, you will.

I will practice accepting the program today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Other people don’t always dream your dream.

~ LINDA RONSTADT ~

Newcomer

When people at meetings use the words “control” and “con-trolling,” the tone is always negative. What’s so bad about control? I’m glad that I have more control over my life, now that I’m not active in my addiction. I grew up hearing about “self-control” all the time. I assumed it was a good thing.

Sponsor

There are different ways in which people in recovery use the word “control.” One of them, in the phrase “controlled drinking” or “controlled drugging,” describes a state that’s neither drunk nor sober. It’s an attempt to use an addictive substance or behavior only in carefully measured amounts— the “I can handle it” approach. Those who engage in it cheat themselves both of the oblivion of addictive behavior and the joy of recovery. I can’t imagine a grimmer form of denial; it means never being free of obsession with a drug.

We also use the word “control” to name the illusion that we’re responsible for all the outcomes of our actions. The Serenity Prayer makes a distinction between things we can and can’t control. It helps me to remember that I have control over my actions, but not over those of others. I can control what I eat, but not how my body processes the food and what I weigh. I can choose my words, but not how people will respond to them. We may expend a lot of energy trying to manipulate others to feel and behave as we wish. It may even seem to work sometimes—but that’s an illusion. I don’t deliberately do things that I think may offend people or hurt their feelings; but what they feel, do, or say in reaction to me is not in the realm of my control.

Today, I accept my powerlessness over addictive substances and my powerlessness over other people’s thoughts and feelings.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Many Groups and Clubs permit a little “friendly game” in the clubrooms. Far be it from us to criticize anyone for anything, as we like a little game occasionally ourselves, but we have all known of cases where the games got out of control. We have well deserved reputations for intemperance.

Card games can be the breeding place for a grand emotional upset and, incidentally, it does not help a fellow’s chance of sobriety to send him home broke to the wife and kids.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) If you think you are an NA watchdog, just remember that watchdogs have to bark and bite

2) My serenity, my pace, my choice

3) We didn’t all arrive on the same ship, but we are all in the same boat.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Ninth Step Prayer

Higher Power, I pray for the right attitude to make my amends, being ever mindful not to harm others in the process. I ask Your guidance in making indirect amends. Most important, I will continue to make amends by staying abstinent, helping others, and growing in spiritual progress.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE BIBLE HAS THE ANSWER

Don’t try to straddle the fence. If you wish to accomplish anything, you must be single-minded. It will be going the long way around if you first turn left and then right when you really want to go straight ahead. Let nothing turn you from the path. The Bible says,

A double-minded man is unstable in all his ways (James 1:8)


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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

I Love You

Love always answers, being unable to deny a call for help, or not to hear the cries of pain that rise to it.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

Half an hour into healer Patricia Sun’s lecture, a man stood and announced, “I came in late—would you please tell me what happened?” This interruption seemed rather rude, considering that Patricia had spent time developing her theme for a thousand eager listeners. But Patricia did not play the judgment game. She smiled at the man and told him, ‘‘I love you—that’s what happened.” Patricia paused for a moment for him to receive the gift; then he replied, “Thank you,” and sat down.

The man was not really seeking information, but love and acknowledgment. He felt left out and wanted to be included. Giving him the love he sought cut past the game he was playing to get it, and everyone was served to observe the gift Patricia gave him.

One of the most powerful ways to deal with irritating behavior is to reinterpret it as a call for love. I am fascinated by teenagers who drive up and down city streets blasting car stereos so loud that one can hardly carry on a conversation within a hundred feet. With each passing year, the speakers grow larger, now to a point where many of these aficionados have removed their back seats to fit in two giant speakers. When I hear one of these cars passing, I translate the gross noise into, “Please pay attention to me! Please listen to me! Please know that I am here!” I am certain that a sociological study would reveal these car owners to be children who have felt unseen and unheard by their parents or society. If we gave our kids more love and attention at home, they would not need to buy huge speakers to demand attention from the world.

The next time someone asks you for attention in an inappropriate way, stop, take a breath, and sincerely tell them, “I love you.”

I pray to give only love today. I know I can meet all needs by giving love.

Love is my answer, no matter what the question.

[caressa222]

April 10

Step by Step

Today, faith that my higher power will open one door if another is shut, be it the door to that job I hoped for but didn’t get, to a reconciliation of a relationship that cannot be mended despite my sincerest efforts, or to anything that I thought I needed and wanted but didn’t get. The higher power replaces what He takes with something else, maybe not what we think we want or need, to be treated grudgingly as a “consolation prize.” I must hold onto the reality that my higher power will provide me with what I need, not necessarily what I want – and I must have faith that He knows better than I that I may not necessarily need what I want. Today, if a door shuts on me, I will not feel trapped or hopeless and instead will seek the door that my higher power is opening. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

GUILT AND WORRY

With the Past, as past, I have nothing to do; nor with the Future as future. I live now.

~ Emerson~

We discover a truth about the past and future in our recovery. There are areas over which we have no control, so it’s useless to feel guilty about the past or worry over the future. Our Steps have allowed us to clean the slate and make amends for the mess of the past. We receive a generous and loving forgiveness from our Higher Power.

We ask our Higher Power to accept our past mistakes and to free us from the garbage those mistakes have produced. The future is in God’s hands. There is nothing we can do about what might happen except to pray for acceptance of God’s will. These prayers produce plenty of work for the present. When the future comes, we will be ready.

The amount of time I spend right now feeling guilty or being worried only uses time that I could spend thanking God for the moment I am living. Gratitude will always make mincemeat of guilt and worry.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The problem is this: skills learned in danger require the presence of danger to be effective.

~ Wayne Muller ~

Many of us had stressful childhoods. Some of us lived in chaotic households. Some of us were badly treated by the people we relied on to take care of us. Life often felt dangerous, but we developed skills to deal with the chaos. Some of us learned to keep all our thoughts and feelings to ourselves, some of us learned to please those around us, and some of us learned to avoid all confrontation or disagreement.

These childhood skills, learned through hard lessons in the presence of danger, may have become fixed in our immature minds as the best answers for a lifetime. But in our adult lives, those dangers may no longer be present. No one is beating us up anymore, but we are still flinching. The door is open for us to walk out, but we now must learn the skills of living in a safer world. We can take small steps by saying how we feel, by opening our hearts to trusted friends, and by asking for what we would like and being generous with others. These skills can be learned, just as our childhood skills were learned, and as we gain this knowledge, we have more and more rewarding fives.

Today I will take some risks that are my privilege as an adult, even if they seem risky.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We learn from every experience, in retrospect, that everything has turned out perfectly.

~ Robbie Rocheford ~

We can all look back on troubling times and understand how they contributed to our growth as women. At the time, we couldn’t imagine how we would survive. Terror and hopelessness were our companions then. What relief the program has given us! We have a new companion now. And we are growing in wisdom about how perfectly our lives are unfolding. Every experience is giving us new understanding and the strength to go on. More important, we are becoming better prepared to help other women survive similar experiences.

We are being guided on this journey by a Higher Power. Each of us has a place to go, a job to do. Because we suffer from “self-will run riot,” we can take wrong turns. Then we suffer the consequences. Fortunately, our Higher Power is always close at hand, ready to help us when we become willing to ask for help. This is likely the most important lesson we are here to learn: ask our Higher Power for help and we will be shown the way.

I can trust that anything I experience today will benefit my growth. If I ask my Higher Power for help and strength, I will feel peace.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can call my doctor when I need to

After being assessed for medication, I was given the prescription, told how to take it, and told to check with my doctor if I had any problems. I took the medicine as prescribed, but after a day or two, my hands got shaky, my mouth got dry, and I felt nauseated.

I wasn’t sure if I should call. My psychiatrist is very busy, has many patients, and I didn’t want to cause a fuss. But eventually I did call and sure enough he thanked me for the report. He prescribed a change in the dosage and asked me to call back if things dint improve. Fortunately, the adjustment helped, and in this process, I learned another way to take care of myself.

If I have any questions about my medication, or if things don’t seem right, I will call my doctor or therapist.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The first and worst of all frauds is to cheat one’s self.

~ Philip James Bailey ~

Clearly, achieving serenity requires rigorous honesty, especially when it comes to our feelings. We are so adept at masking our vulnerability and imperfections, pretending to know what we can’t possibly know, pretending we have no limits. In this way we often remain untrue to ourselves.

Although it may take many months or even years, we are equal to the difficulty and challenge of rigorous honesty. We can practice openness and avoid using defenses. We can learn to avoid using rage to cover fear and hurt, and avoid using smiles to cover sadness and pain.

In recovery we can learn to know, and tell, our real feelings. We can find harmony with ourselves.

Rigorous honesty can become one of our character traits, particularly when we feel that we no longer have to fear sharing who we really are.

Today help me overcome my fears of being vulnerable and imperfect. Help me achieve serenity by honestly sharing my feelings.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

True solitude is the din of birdsong, seething leaves, whirling colors, or a clamor of tracks in the snow.

~ Edward Hoagland ~

For most people, the first and only choice in life is to be with someone or to have someone be there for you. There is no second choice or any “second-best” scenario. You are either in the Land of We, or you are alone. And who wants to be alone? Who chooses to be in the Land of Me?

Many important paths presented to you during your journey in recovery and in life are narrow, winding, steep, and hard to negotiate. They cannot be traveled by walking hand-in-hand with another. These paths must be explored walking single file—in solitude, silence, and singular contemplation. To avoid these paths simply because they require solitude prevents you from developing self-reliance. Without them, you cannot test your wings.

Recovery teaches you not only how to be alone, but also how to choose to be alone. Choosing to be alone builds self-reliance. No one else can do this for you. You must learn to explore your own visions and expand your personal horizons on your own—and when you are alone. In doing so, you become vitally connected to understanding your own capabilities.

Today I will choose moments of solitude so I may test my wings.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

“And this, too, shall pass away.” How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction! “And this, too, shall pass away.”

~ Abraham Lincoln ~

Sometimes, when we’re in a dark hour, we may believe time has suddenly stopped. Forever after, we shall always have this pain or sadness or despair. From here on, we think, this is how it’s going to be-minute after minute of pain.

But we need to remember time passes quickly when we’re enjoying ourselves. When we’re in the midst of a negative feeling, every hour seems like two. But this present hour will not endure. Nor the next. Sorrows pass, just as happiness does. Pain passes, just as pleasure does. Nothing really stays the same, nothing ever stands still.

All we need to do, right now, is endure this moment. It, too, shall pass. We need to have strength, patience, faith, and a strong belief that this moment – and the feelings in this moment – will not endure. Time passes, and so will the pain.

Tonight I may need help remembering that this, too, shall pass. How can I let my Higher Power help me?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Improving the way we feel

It is hard to see that we lay the groundwork for all our emotions. It’s also hard to accept the fact that we tend to blame our pain on anything or anyone else. That way, we placed all responsibility outside ourselves.

We are the source of most of our troubles, but we can also be the source of our happiness. If we make conditions inside ourselves conducive to joy and happiness, joy and happiness will be a part of us as well. Through God, we can change the conditions inside ourselves.

How am I feeling inside?

Higher Power, help me to make the conditions inside myself a place for good things and not just troubles.

I will improve the way I feel today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I think the one lesson I have learned, is that there is no substitute for paying attention.

~ DIANE SAWYER ~

Newcomer

I’m embarrassed to admit this, but I often sit in a meeting just looking at everyone’s shoes and trying to decide which ones I like. Or I may be sort of half listening while looking at what people are wearing or how their hair is cut, trying to figure out whether the same thing would look okay on mo. I guess I sound pretty superficial.

Sponsor

Sometimes the intensity of recovery feels overwhelming. We drift, thinking there’s something wrong with the meeting or with us. Our thoughts are elsewhere, racing a mile a minute, or else we fall asleep. The problem isn’t that we’re easily bored or unwilling to concentrate. More likely, we’re trying to get some relief from feelings that are surfacing within us. A lot happens at meetings. Some people are sharing stories that remind us of our own, and some are sharing their experience of a new way of life that challenges beliefs and habits we’ve held for a long time. It sometimes feels like too much. The experience itself of sitting in a room with other people uses mental and emotional energy, and may raise anxieties for some of us. It takes getting used to. The good news is that in time we do find it easier to be fully present.

Today, I gently let go of concerns about my rate of progress, as I remain consistent about attending meetings and working the program.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

When the wife would take me to task in my drinking days, I would soon show her who was boss of the establishment. I would tell her in no uncertain terms that “When I ceased being Captain of the ship, I would sink it.”

Oh, yes, I was Captain but somehow the ship was continually on the rocks. It wasn’t my fault, understand, the wind and the waves were always against me.

Now I have resigned my commission as Captain, I have a new Navigator and my ship keeps pretty well on its course. I’m only a deck hand now but I’m happier with less responsibility and I am confident it’s much safer.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) HOPE: Hang Onto Power Everyday

2) Action: Utilize, don’t analyze.

3) New Level; New Devil.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Tenth Step Prayer

I pray I may continue;
To grow in understanding and effectiveness;
To take daily spot-check inventories of myself;
To correct mistakes when I make them;
To take responsibility for my actions;
To be ever aware of my negative and self-defeating attitudes and behaviors;
To keep my wilfulness in check;
To always remember I need Your help;
To keep love and tolerance of others as my code;
And to continue in daily prayer how I can best serve You, my Higher Power.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

NO SUPERSTITIONS

Don’t harbour superstitions of any kind, big or little. People often make a fetish of a number or a date, or a keepsake; or they believe certain things bring “bad luck.” This is denying God. The Bible says,

Thou shalt have no other gods before me (Exodus 20:3)

Because thou hast made the Lord . . . thy habitation; There shall no evil befall thee . . . (Psalm 91:9 – 10)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Integrity

Have a purpose in life, and having it, throw into your work such strength of mind and muscle as God gives you.

~ Thomas Carlyle ~

The telephone repairman showed me the cause of the terrible static on my line. “Do you see where all these wires come together?” he asked, pointing to the junction of wires from my four house telephones. “This one wire is faulty, and it is polluting the rest of the circuits.” He removed the one wire and let me listen to the other lines, which became perfectly clear.

When one area of our life is out of integrity, it affects all the others. When you compromise or live a lie in an important relationship, it will create static in your career. When you clean up one area that is out of harmony, the other areas will advance at rocket speed.

Purify any parts of my life out of alignment with Your purpose, so I may live as a whole and powerful being.

One with God, I am united with my purpose. My life must succeed in every way.

[caressa222]

April 11

Step by Step

Today, seek new friends, acquaintances and relationships that sobriety holds and turn away from the bittersweet memories of what was lost in our drinking days. Instead of languishing in regret or mourning what is gone and cannot be replaced, remember that we are sober, and sober thinking opens itself to working for what can be and not pining for what was and never again will be. If attending meetings is the extent of our participation in AA, we can spring into service as a 12th-Stepper, or sponsor or simply talking and listening to a co-member to lay the foundation of a new life with new friends, new acquaintances and new relationships. And should we be blessed with someone who today takes us out of the emotional baggage of yesterday, we can start to believe that a new and better life in sobriety is indeed possible. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

BEAUTY

Beauty as we feel it is something indescribable; what it is or what it means can never be said.

~ George Santayana ~

Beauty is among our most useful and most used words as we progress towards spiritual goals. The kind of beauty that guides our thinking in recovery does not lie on the outside, but rises from within. When we learn to see that beauty in the words, actions, and attitudes of others as well as in the principles we follow, we are choosing well.

Our friends have beauty because of who they really are, not what they appear to be. The emotions we feel and the living guides we follow are beautiful simply because we need them.

I will have no trouble finding spiritual beauty in our Program. True beauty never dies. It is found in all thoughts, attitudes and emotions, if only I seek it,

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Where there is fear, we lose the way of our spirit.

~ Mahatma Gandhi ~

We don’t like to admit that we are afraid. But when we won’t admit the feeling, we can’t deal with it. By denying our fears, we don’t get stronger, we weaken ourselves. Denying fear doesn’t get rid of problems, it only reinforces them. In the end, if we don’t handle fear well, it rules us.

Fear is a universal human emotion, and we cannot eradicate it. We must learn how to handle the hot coals of fear. When we learn how, they don’t have to be destructive. Handling fear begins with self-knowledge. We first learn that the unsettling feeling we have may be fear. Our desire to run away, or the tight knot in our gut, may be fear. That admission to ourselves can be followed by talking about it to a friend or a sponsor. Sometimes just speaking the fear out loud to someone we trust is enough to put it back in perspective. We have handled it.

Today I will notice my feelings and respond to feeling of fear in constructive ways.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I can have my way more often if I have more than one way.

~ Stephanie Abbott ~

We find ourselves doing battle with the world if we turn every dispute into a confrontation. Seldom do any two of us see something in exactly the same way. This diversity is what makes life interesting— rich and educational. If any one ego dominated how all of us perceived every incident, life would be boring at best.

We all want our own opinion to dominate, whether it’s over when to eat or what movie to see. Perhaps it’s merely human to want our ego in charge. Or maybe that’s only true of people as insecure as us. In the program, at least, we’re in the right place. We can change. We can learn to let others be right too.

There are many reactions to any situation. Our own way will serve occasionally. We have the opportunity to learn alternative responses too.

There are many ways to interpret my experiences today. I will be flexible and occasionally look from another’s vantage point.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I Can Handle My Changes

I’m not using alcohol or drugs these days and I’m getting help for my depression. Overall I feel much better (although the side effects of the medication are a nuisance). But so much is changing. Sometimes I don’t feel like myself or I wonder about who I am. (Is this due to the medication?) I feel in a word, unsettled.

It helped when I brought this up with my doctor. She understood and supported me, saying that recovery is very unsettling and uncomfortable for everyone. It will get better over time, she added, especially once the medication is optimized. Knowing how normal I am makes this stage much easier for me to accept.

I will talk with two members of my support group today about how they handled all the changes of my dual recovery.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Turn it over.

~ Program Saying ~

“How do you ‘turn it over?’” We often hear this question in meetings. The struggle isn’t as much with the “turning over” as with making a decision. When something happens and we feel confused, it generally boils down to one simple question: Are we going to do it our way (again), or follow the lead of our Higher Power?

Deep down, we know the right thing to do. It may not be easy or familiar, but we need to do it. Resisting change and getting caught up in managing our own lives, the lives of other people, places, or things is the start of our problems. That way, we take a simple task and turn it into a major chore. But if we keep it simple and do the next right thing, we are “turning it over.”

We need to listen to our inner voice. Sometimes it is easy to hear; other times it’s difficult, because we don’t like what it’s saying. We need to sit quietly, become peaceful and open. The answer will come. If we can’t quiet ourselves, we can go to others in the program and listen to them. They will often tell us what we need to hear.

Today I pray for the courage to accept direction and the courage to follow through into action.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the action stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living.

~ Anais Nin ~

Steve Ross, who put together the Time Warner merger and left millions in his estate when he died, structured his life around being a dream maker. When he was a teenager, he was summoned to his father’s deathbed and given this advice: There are those who work all day, those who dream all day, and those who spend an hour dreaming before setting to work to fulfill those dreams. “Go into the third category,” his father told him, “because there is virtually no competition.”

The biggest roadblock to realizing a dream is the fear you will fail. The second biggest roadblock is the fear you will succeed. Both can keep you mired in the same spot, neither advancing nor retreating from your dreams. But dreams are your hopes and desires for the future. They are symbols of your commitment to who you can become.

So today, go ahead and dream—and then take the steps that will help you to move closer to your dream. You have the power to make a dream come true, but only if you try.

Today I will focus on one of my dreams. I will do at least one thing that will help make this dream a reality.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We need the courage to start and continue what we should do, and courage to stop what we shouldn’t do.

~ Richard L. Evans ~

What is courage? Many of us think it involves surviving against all odds. Some of us believe courage is personified by an individual like Helen Keller, who coped with many physical defects to vastly change her life and the lives of those around her. Others of us believe courage is personified by people like astronaut John Glenn, who took risks trying something new knowing he could fail.

Are we courageous? Compared to those people we would probably say no. Yet we are because we have taken risks to change our lives. Being willing to change is an act of courage. Believing in change and forging ahead on the new, uncharted path is an act of courage.

We are the only ones who can change ourselves. Just as Helen Keller and John Glenn made decisions to alter their lives, so do we make decisions to risk changes. Whether we started on our new way of life years ago, days ago, or even hours ago, we are filled with courage because of the decisions we made.

I can say the Serenity Prayer and remember my courage.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being free

Some psychologists believe that some people don’t want to be free. In the middle of our addiction, we certainly had no freedom. We lost it all to the call of that fix, pill, or drink. We lost our freedom because we lost the power to decide how we wanted to behave. We had no choice.

Now we have a choice, and although we can never be free from our addiction, we can be free in our addiction! We can never be a former alcoholic or an ex-addict, but never again must we take those chemicals and de-stroy our being. The choice is ours.

Am I choosing to be free?

I pray to realize that if I let go and let God, I will be free.

I will honor my freedom today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Say what you mean and mean what you say, hut don’t he mean when you say it.

~ SAYING HEARD AT MEETINGS ~

Newcomer

At a meeting I went to, the chairman made comments every time someone shared. Isn’t that what they call “cross talk”?

Sponsor

Certain customs vary from meeting to meeting. I’ve heard more than one definition of “cross talk” and seen some differences in whether or not it’s considered permissible to respond when others are sharing.

At most meetings, it’s not customary to respond directly to what another person shares by offering opinions or advice. It’s fine, though, to identify with what’s been said and to share our own experience on a related feeling or topic. At some meetings the speaker responds to sharing, but rarely interrupts, even with a brief, good-humored comment. At others, the speaker simply says “thank you”—or nothing at all. Limiting cross talk promotes the habit of tolerance and helps create an atmosphere in which it’s safe to share openly and honestly.

Other customs, too, vary from fellowship to fellowship, from place to place throughout the country, even from meeting to meeting in the same city or town. Some meetings give out chips to mark anniversaries; some celebrate them with cakes and presentations. Some meetings sell raffle tickets; the prize is usually program literature. Some meetings prohibit smoking. Such policies may be dictated by local custom or decided at business meetings or “group conscience” meetings.

Recovery keeps offering us opportunities to become more flexible and tolerant.

Today, I am open and flexible. I cultivate lightness as I look and listen.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We alcoholics have learned that if we fight liquor we are bound to lose. We always have. Our only hope is a complete abandonment of any ideas that we might have once entertained that we can drink. We must get sober and learn to like it. We should throw ourselves into all group activities, read all AA literature and other spiritually inspiring books we can get, brush up on our praying.

As you practice this you will find that whisky will get further and further from your minds and when you do think of it you will regard it as a beverage for some guys, but poison for yourself.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) From Rave to Grave

2) If you used enough to get to NA, you used enough.

3) Serenity comes when you stop expecting and start accepting.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Eleventh Step Prayer

Higher Power, as I understand You, I pray to keep open my connection with You and to keep it clear from the confusion of daily life. Through m prayers and meditations I ask especially for freedom from self-will, rationalization, and wishful thinking. I pray for the guidance of correct thought and positive action. Your will, Higher Power, not mine, be done.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LOOSEN UP!

Loosen up. To be tense is the surest way to fail in any undertaking great or small.

To desire success is a splendid thing but to pursue success too tensely is to make certain of missing it. The carefree approach in any endeavour is a shortcut to success. In music, in sport, in study, in business life, many people fail, or advance very slowly, because they make hard work of it.

Treat your work as fun. Regard the difficulties as part of the game, laugh off the annoyances. This, of course, is the real difference between work and play.

Take it easy. Loosen up!

For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light (Matthew 11:30).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

My Invisible Partner

You and God are a majority.

~ Anonymous ~

After Mr. Taylor experienced several business failures, in exasperation he turned to God and declared, “Okay, I give up trying to do it all by myself. I invite You to be my partner in all future endeavors. If You want something to be, I trust You to manifest it; if it is not Your will, I will not struggle.”

Mr. Taylor’s next venture was a small department store. True to his promise, this time he proceeded with ease and peace, knowing that with God as his partner, he would not have to fight for his good. As a result, the store flourished, and Mr. Taylor went on to create a hugely successful chain—Lord and Taylor.

Trying to do it all yourself leads to frustration, exhaustion, and failure. While it is important to be responsible and self-reliant, it is equally important to be open to receive support. Everything in nature gives to other living beings; we cannot do it all alone. All good things are overseen and supported by a higher power. Do all you can without anxiety or struggle, and trust Spirit to do the rest.

I invite You to be my partner. I allow You to do for me what I cannot do for myself. I let go of fear and struggle, and step onto the path of joy.

I am empowered by Spirit. Together we must succeed.

[majestyjo]

April 12

Step by Step

Today, I can believe my worst days are behind and not ahead of me if I don’t drink in the current 24 Hours and not think in terms of a lifetime, a year, a month or even a week without alcohol. If I can be honest about remembering that moment when I knew alcohol had made my life unmanageable and why I came to AA, I might also remember that my days as a drinking alcoholic were the darkest and toughest of my life. And if that is true, I can look no further than those people who are in recovery to know that sobering up will be nowhere near as tough as continuing to drink. Today, if I am teetering and preoccupied with how many tomorrows will be without alcohol, I will live only in the current 24 hours, just one day at a time. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

VALUES

By accepting God’s help we learn to think clearly, to play fairly, and to give generously.

~ Anonymous ~

Our values change in recovery as we become less and less selfish. The value screen through which we see life is changed. We no longer ask what everyone can do for us; w ask what we can do for them. We no longer seek out situations that only comfort us; we discover ways to comfort. We find that we feel better about ourselves when we help others. We learn from our Program that what we have been searching for our whole lives is wrapped up in service to others.

The valuable relationship is the one that creates a closer contact with our Higher Power, so we seek out situations and people that bring us into closer contact.

The values we show in the work of recovery look different from the ones we once held. Every day brings a new chance to become a conductor of life.

My values no longer change with every passing fancy. My life is beginning to mean something and to count for things that are good.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Between stimulus and response, man has the freedom to choose.

~Stephen R. Covey ~

Ancient wise men first identified that crucial gap in time between the moment we first sense something and the response we give. They taught meditation principles focusing on this distinction and spent hours in contemplation that led to deep inner peace and serenity. Most of us, in our busy lives, do not devote hours and days to that focus, but we can learn to practice the crucial wisdom of chosen response instead of instant reflex.

Reactivity is like a knee-jerk response. It comes from a primitive part of our brains. If we haven’t learned of that brief gap between the stimulus and our response, then we don’t even know we have a choice. We might say, “I couldn’t help it. If he hadn’t done that, I wouldn’t have done what I did,” At that point we are still immature and weak. When we gain awareness of this tiny bit of time to choose the best response, we step from immaturity into the strength of a grown man.

Today I will become more aware of that moment of choice between a stimulus and my response.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Taking responsibility for the part I play in the cause of my problems frees me to do something about them.

~ Kathy McGraw ~

We used to love to blame other people for the burdens and hurdles in our lives. That someone else was to blame for our personal upset was as obvious to us as rain splashing against the windshield. Yet the longer we looked at others rather than at ourselves, the more stuck we became in old behavior.

We’ve since come to understand that we simply cannot grow, we cannot harvest the fruits of this recovery program, unless we develop a willingness to take responsibility for who we are at every instant of our lives. As we begin taking responsibility for our actions, we feel empowered. We realize that we are who we have chosen to be. And we will be who we decide we want to be. As that reality permeates our consciousness, we will begin to know that our hopes can become real, because the promises in the Big Book are real.

I will feel strengthened by claiming responsibility for all that I am today. Before taking action, I can pause and consider whether I will feel good about my choice.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am OK when I make a mistake

Growing up I learned that it was important to look strong at all times. I even learned not to apologize. Yet sometimes I did things that I felt bad about. But to acknowledge them was to look weak and perhaps to risk attack.

In recovery I am learning new ideas, new ways. I am learning that it’s OK to acknowledge mistakes. I’m finding out that if I say “I’m sorry,” my guilt diminishes. When I make a mistake in recovery, I no longer feel angry at myself or assume that I’m bad or weak. Instead, I see myself as someone who can make a mistake, learn from it, and then be willing to change. It’s good to know I’m human.

I will pray for strength to accept myself and admit my mistakes.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Leave room for God to surprise you!

~ Ernie K. ~

If we always get what we want, and things always go our way, and people always do what we want them to do, we have no need for God. When we know what’s going to happen, we become God, all-knowing.

It is human to be disappointed when we don’t get what we want. But when we dwell on our disappointment, as if we should have gotten what we wanted, then we forget to trust that God may have something different in store for us. Many of us pray, “Thy will be done,” but more often than not, when we don’t get what we want, we forget it may be God’s will that we not get it!

We can only know the present moment. This is our life — all of it. When we worry about future wants and past disappointments, we don’t leave room in ourselves for the present. When we let God take care of the future and live the best we can right now, we can feel assured we’ll be ready for the better things that are in store for us.

Today help me to trust in Your will.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

They also serve who only stand and wait.

~ John Milton ~

Volunteers at the Grupo Ecologico de la Costa Verde in Mexico know the value of patience as they guide hatchling turtles back to the sea from their sandy beach nests. Crossing the sand is a crucial part of the imprinting pro-cess that brings the turtles back to lay their eggs at the place of their birth.

Moonlight illuminates the course the turtles must take, but they can easily become misdirected by the lights of civilization. Yet they must get to the ocean on their own to complete the imprinting process. So as the time of hatching draws near, volunteers stand and wait for hours near the nests at night until the turtles break free from their shells and slowly emerge from the sand. Then volunteers gently turn the turtles in the right direction and follow their progress, inch by inch, over a period of several hours until the turtles make it to the sea.

The same process can be applied to your recovery. Skimming through the Big Book and rushing through the Twelve Steps will not hasten the restoration of your sanity, health, and wholeness. Your rebirth takes time and requires dedicated patience.

Today I will resist rushing and instead take my time in all that I do. Having patience with myself and with others can be directly applied to the process of my recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I have wept in the night
For the shortness of sight
That to somebody’s need made me blind;
But I have never yet
Felt a tinge of regret
For being a little too kind.

~ Anonymous ~

We have only to turn on the evening news to be deluged by all the unkindnesses in the world. Natural disasters destroy and kill. People murder. Governments oppress and torture. People discriminate against others. But if we turn off the evening news and take a look at our own lives – at our relationships – we can see that unkindness is just as prevalent.

Kindness is like a beautiful flowering plant. Pay attention to it, water it, nourish it, tend to its needs, and it will flourish. One flower will open, then another, with a reward of brilliant colors. Show it no kindness, and it will close up its beauty and die.

There are flowers all around me. I need to cultivate my garden with kindness.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Accepting God’s will

Step Eleven concludes “. . . praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.” This tells us that when we pray for “whatever is right,” the best will happen for all concerned, including our-selves. We may even receive more than we asked for.

In times of crisis, when we feel that things must go our way or we’ll lose faith in God, do we stop to remember that God works in mysterious ways? Nothing, not even death, is without a purpose. Accepting whatever comes as God’s will avoids blame and anger, and keeps us present and focused.

Am I learning acceptance?

Higher Power, help me understand that disasters are not punishments, and they can make your purpose clear.

I will practice acceptance today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Happiness is a way-station between too little and too much.

~ CHANNING POLLOCK ~

Newcomer

I’m in a bind. Someone asked me to attend an event, and I said yes. I think I should be doing more than just going to meetings. Now that the date’s almost here, I wish I’d said no; I don’t really want to go. But I don’t think I should let people down at the last minute any more—I did that too much when I was active in my addiction.

Sponsor

When I was new in recovery, I had a serious case of what we call “people-pleasing.” It’s taken time to sort out my own needs and desires. I’ve found that I need to spend time with people and that I also need time for solitude and rest. Chances to try new things are among the gifts of recovery, but I don’t have to do everything that comes along. It still takes effort to plan ahead for activities I care about and to leave room for spontaneity.

Making choices that please and nurture us is healthy. If we need to, we can change our minds and our plans—it’s not the same thing as picking up our addictions. We need to be clear about our motives, however. If we find that we’re consistently waiting until the last minute, then backing out of commitments, perhaps we’re letting fear make our decisions. And sometimes, it’s just plain easier to go ahead and keep a commitment we’re less than thrilled about. If we’ve made a mistake, it’s not the end of the world; our mistakes are our teachers. Through trial and error, we eventually learn how to choose good company and make appropriate commitments.

Today, I’m showing up for my life.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

When we alcoholics arrived at that point in our drinking careers that we commonly call “our bottom”; when difficulties were pouring in from every side; when there was no longer any room left to retreat and all our defenses had crumbled – we found that we had no other alternative but take the last desperate effort of the totally beaten.

AA proved, as history has often done, that the best defense is a strong offense.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) We may not have it all together, BUT together we have it ALL!

2) HOPE: Happy Our Program Exists

3) Actions speak louder than words.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Twelfth Step Prayer

Dear God,

My spiritual awakening continues to unfold. The help I have received I shall pass on and give to others, both in and out of the Fellowship. For this opportunity I am grateful.

I pray most humbly to continue walking day by day on the road of spiritual progress. I pray for the inner strength and wisdom to practice the principles of this way of life in all I do and say. I need You, my friends, and the Program every hour of every day. This is a better way to live.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

A DOOR OPENS

Change is the law of the universe. Without change, the world would not merely remain in a static state, but it would soon become stale and stagnant. Without change there would be no progress, for change is the essence of betterment. It is obvious that to do anything in a new and better way there must be a change.

Many people look upon change with dread and foreboding. But for those on the spiritual path—for those who believe in God and the power of prayer—change is a fuller expression of life.

When a problem or condition arises in your life that indicates a change, rely upon God, and realize that it is not so much as a door has closed on a chapter of your life, but rather that a door has opened on new and more interesting things.

Behold, I make all things new (Revelation 21:5)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

A Touch Can Change a Life

Never underestimate the power of a kind act.

~ Anonymous ~

In the midst of a long meditation retreat, Rick was feeling tired, bored, and discouraged. Waking up to a cold, dark morning, he decided he would leave today. As Rick joined the line of students for the morning walking meditation practice, the man behind him placed his hand comfortingly on Rick’s shoulder. “With that touch I felt renewed,” Rick explained. “Although the man did not speak a word, I felt him tell me, ‘It’s okay. I know you are having a hard time; hang in there.’ From that moment on, my attitude was transformed, and I went on to complete the retreat.”

Kindness is powerful, contagious, and transformative. Never underestimate the potential of a friendly smile, gentle touch, or supportive word. So many people walk the world in pain and self-doubt. Your simple gift could make all the difference in a friend’s or stranger’s day, and even save their life. You are the light of the world—let it shine!

Let me be a positive influence on everyone I meet.
I offer myself to make a difference in the lives I touch.

God blesses the world through my words and hands.
I am a messenger of love.

[majestyjo]

April 13

Step by Step

Today, I detach to be objective and see and accept myself for what I am and not what I hope I am. Because I am asked by AA to work through my emotional and character defects, I must first see them honestly before I can correct them. Here, I look to Step 4 to identify those flaws and, instead of rationalizing or justifying them, I have to see and accept them for what they are – defects that I cannot afford to carry into recovery. And, after reviewing my Fourth, I must look to the Serenity Prayer for the “courage to change the things I can.” Today, when I look in a mirror, I need to see the man in it. I won’t see him if I look at him through rose-colored glasses. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

COURAGE

God, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that You and I together can’t handle.

~ Anonymous ~

Courage is what makes us do the right thing even when nobody else is doing it. We can find happiness while surrounded by darkness; we can be loving in the middle of hate and envy, and serene when surrounded by chaos, fear, and anger.

The principles of our Program help us face impossible odds. We learn that any act of courage may produce future victory for ourselves and others. The courage which we want takes its strength from faith, not from bravery or physical strength.

Foolish, unthinking courage, though, can be destructive to us or to others. Sensible courage never fails because it is made up of truth and faith.

Let truth and faith give me courage, so that when fear knocks, no one is there.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something but to be someone.

~ Coco Chanel ~

Why are we working so hard? What are we striving to-ward? Do we want to achieve some important accomplishment, or do we want to be someone we respect? Naturally we don’t have just one aim. We have many goals and hopes, but what are the most important ones?

When we focus on becoming the best kind of person we know how to be, we leave behind all our anxieties about how well we can perform. We still need to accomplish tasks and do our work, but the important thing now is the kind of person we are while we are doing them. Are we honest? Are we considerate of others? Is our heart open to the world? Do we take responsibility for our actions? When we fulfill the personal qualities that we admire, we can allow our-selves some slack for mistakes and imperfection in our achievements.

Today I am grateful that I am becoming someone I respect.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The child in me says “Hold on”; the adult in me says “Let go.”

~ Harriet Hodgson ~

Learning to let go is growing up. Whether we’re twenty-five or sixty-five, we have to learn to let go. We don’t do it automatically. The principles of this program can serve as our guide.

Perhaps we learned in childhood that if we didn’t want to lose our toys, we had to hold on to them. A pattern was set; we began hanging on to everything. But now it’s time for new training, for learning to let go of everything: possessions, people, attitudes, opinions. Patience and practice accomplish the growth we seek.

We must be prepared for backsliding. Some situations cry for us to hold on rather than let go. We have to be vigilant and forgive ourselves when we give in to the old urge to control. Being adult takes desire and consistent effort. The child in us doesn’t give in easily.

I have a choice today. I can handle all circumstances as an adult and feel free, or my “child” can trigger a confrontation. What will I do?

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am trying to accept my medication.

I’m not yet comfortable with my psychiatric medications. But I don’t know which is worse—feeling sad and anxious without the medication or feeling out of touch, thirsty, and constipated due to the side effects. It seems that there are problems either way. I guess I thought the medication would just take care of everything.

So my doctor and I talked again about the side effects. We also talked about how this medication helps—much like a pair of eyeglasses—but does not cure, and how I still have to do my part to recover. I trust my doctor. Working together with her, I believe that slowly, things will improve all around.

I will ask my higher power for willingness and for patience.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Great opportunities to serve God are rare, little opportunities happen every day.

~ Anonymous ~

We often read or hear about people who have made major contributions to the well-being of others. Some donate large sums of money to build schools or hospitals. Others perform acts of great heroism or skill in saving others’ lives. If only we could do one of these things! If only a great opportunity presented itself so the world could see we really do care.

The problem with waiting for “The Great Opportunity” is that it may never come. And even if it did, the desire to perform great acts often has its roots in a large ego, not a large heart!

If we really want to serve God and others, there are opportunities every day. Like giving a genuine compliment to someone, or offering to take someone to or from a meeting if they otherwise can’t go, or some small kindness to a stranger.

We don’t need to wait for a great opportunity. Serving others in little, everyday ways can bring great joy.

Today may I be willing, in attitude and action, to reach out and help others, as I continue to help myself and accept help from others.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance.

~ Harrison Ford ~

Imagine you have a map in your hands, one you have used to guide you through the years. It shows all of your old routes of thinking, feeling, and behaving.

Recovery provides you with a new map, with an un-familiar destination and different routes. Rather than discard your old map, you may still bring it out from time to time and think how much easier it would be to follow. But until you set forth on the course provided by the new map, you will never know what opportunities await you. You will never understand that your new destination may be more promising and enjoyable than the old one.

Take, for example, the story of Jill Elikann Barad. She wanted to be a surgeon, but fainted her first time in the operating room. After wandering from job to job, she ended up at Mattel where she refashioned a toy that had seen better days. She recreated Barbie and ended up president of the company. “The idea of trying everything is important,” she said. “Your experiences come together and make you multidimensional.” When you change your map, you change yourself and transform your world into something better.

Today I will trust the map of recovery to guide me in all that I do.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.

~ Thomas Jefferson ~

We see our true selves when we don’t resculpt our bodies, change the style of our hair, or try to imagine someone else instead of us. If we see ourselves as we honestly are, then we will see the imperfections that make us who we are: perhaps too much weight or not enough, a not-so-clear complexion, or being too short or tall. We will never look the way we really want because our desires are usually impossible to attain. We can certainly make some changes, but we need to learn to see an honest picture of ourselves.

The first step to get to know who we are is to know what we look like. We can start by taking off our clothes and standing naked in front of a mirror. That’s us, no matter how much we may want to look away or cry or laugh out loud. We may wish that wasn’t what we looked like, but that’s because we’ve learned to look at others rather than ourselves. We can take the first step toward wisdom and maturity by seeing our honest reflection, and accepting it.

I will gather up courage to really look at my reflection. I will accept the good as well as the bad.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Growing

We all perform on two stages, one public, one private. The public stage is what we do and say. The private stage is what we think and what we rehearse in our minds to do on the public stage. Even though we may never perform it, what we rehearse in our minds helps mold our characters and guide our actions.

Are we rehearsing anger, fights, and what we’re going to tell that SOB next time? Are we rehearsing drug use, the old ways of living? If so, we are risking the recovery we have achieved.

To keep growing and to keep building character, we need to rehearse kindness, patience, and love. We need to practice aware-ness of our Higher Power in our lives.

Am I growing?

May I practice kindness, patience, and love in all my affairs today.

Today I will seek to grow by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Creating intimacy is a skill.

~ LAUREL MELLIN ~

Newcomer

The so-called suggestion not to have relationships in the first year makes me angry. The rest of the world falls in love, and people get together. Why can’t I?

Sponsor

Let’s remember that there are many, many kinds of relationships, including friendships, professional relationships, and relationships like ours, the sponsor-sponsee relationship. All of them offer valuable experience and practice at something we addicts don’t know much about: the gradual process, over time, of sharing ourselves with fellow human beings.

As a newly recovering person, you still have a lot to learn about yourself. Why rush the process? The person you are today and the person you will be after several months in recovery may not have much in common. You may quickly outgrow a romantic relationship that you enter into this early in your journey. Other newcomers, like you, are involved in a revolutionary process of growth and change. If you risk getting involved with a newcomer, you may find yourself unceremoniously dumped or vulnerable to the person’s unreasonable demands or unthinking behavior. Instead, you can choose to allow yourself a luxury during these early months—that of creating a sensitive, loving relationship with yourself.

Today, I cherish my new, growing relationship with myself. I look and listen lovingly to my needs and wants.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Many persons look upon AA as something new and revolutionary whereas it is just the reverse. We have no new thoughts or doctrines and we have certainly discovered no new cures.

Our medications are those administered two thousand years ago. Our philosophies were borrowed, not word for word but in substance, from the Great Book our mothers read to us as children.

While science experimented for new and certain cures, we dug out the old but still potent prescription and administered it with sympathy and understanding. We can attest to the fact that it still works.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) What the devil presents to you is always a real pretty picture. But there is always one hellava price to pay.

2) Share with your sponsor the “take it to the grave” stuff.

3) Life sucks! (But in NA, life sucks one day at a time).

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Meeting Prayer No. 1

Our Father, we come to you as a friend.

You have said that, where two or three are gathered in Your name, there You will be in the midst. We believe you are with us now.

We believe this is something You would have us do, and that it has Your blessing.

We believe You want us to be real partners with you in this daily business of living, accepting our full responsibility, and certain that the rewards will be freedom, and growth, and happiness.

For this, we are grateful.

We ask You, at all times, to guide us.

Help us daily to come closer to you, and grant us new ways of living our gratitude.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GET BACK ON THE BEAM

Today most commercial flying is done on a radio beam. A directional beam is produced to guide the pilot to his destination, and as long as he keeps on this beam he knows that he is safe, even if he cannot see around him for fog, or get his bearings in any other way. As soon as he gets off the beam in any direction he is in danger, and he immediately rises to get back on the beam.

Those who believe in the Allness of God, have a spiritual beam upon which to navigate.

You are off the beam the moment you are angry or resentful or jealous or frightened or depressed; and when such a condition arises you should immediately get back on the beam by turning quietly to God in thought, claiming His Presence, claiming that His Love and Intelligence are with you, and that the promises in the Bible are true today. You are back on the beam and you will reach port in safety.

Keep on the beam and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

For this God is our God for ever and ever. He will be our guide even unto death (Psalm 48:14)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

The Active Ingredient

Though I speak with the tongues of men and angels and have not love, I am a noisy gong and a clanging cymbal.

~ Corinthians 13:1 ~

Have you ever read the list of ingredients on a tube of toothpaste or patent medicine? There is usually a long roll of chemicals, colorings, and additives, followed by bold letters: “Active Ingredient”—the one that really gets the job done and makes the item worth buying. Everything else is a filler or enhancer. Without the active ingredient, the stuff would be useless.

Love is the active ingredient of life, the chemical that makes everything else worthwhile. You can have all the other amenities, but if love is absent, you are lost. You can feel victimized or abandoned, but if you add love, suddenly life has meaning again.

I met a woman who owned a booming ski resort. “I have done very well financially for many years,” she told me. “But lately I have felt bored and irritable; my life and job seem to have no meaning. I meditated on my situation, and the answer that came was ‘more caring.’ I realized that my work had become distasteful because I had gotten caught up in the mechanics rather than the essence, which is taking care of people. So I rededicated myself to making my clients happy, regardless of the financial outcome. I even found ways I could reduce rates. Now my work is a delight, and I am even more successful.”

Have you retained the active ingredient, or has it slipped away? If so, ask yourself how your work, relationships, or spiritual path could be enhanced by bringing more heart to them. Rearrange your priorities to give care first, and all else will follow.

Show me how to truly care, that I may bring Your peace to my daily activities.

Love is my function. I am a servant of the heart.

[majestyjo]

April 14

Step by Step

Today, Step Four to identify destructive and good character components, although this alone is insufficient. I also need to understand the reason for them, especially the bad, so that the behavior will not trigger actions of my character defects. It is not enough to say I am sorry that I thought ill of my father and that I failed to respect him. I need to ask why I did not respect him. Was I so selfish that I blamed him when he didn’t get me the new car when I got my driver’s license, or was it because he beat me when he was drunk – which might have been a lot? Similarly, if I identify a positive character trait, why do I think it is good? Is it because I sincerely want to be good or is it because I expect something in return, a marker to be called in down the road? Today, if I take my Fourth, I will try to understand it is not enough to name and ask my higher power to take away my character defects and hold onto the good without first knowing the reasons for them. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FEAR

F.E.A.R. = Frustration, Ego, Anxiety, and Resentment.

~ Anonymous ~

We don’t want to return to the life we led before recovery, but fear should never be the reason why we don’t. Fear keeps us from being open to the Program. If we’re only in the Program because we’re afraid of the old way of life, we’ll never pay attention and open our souls to learn about the new. We’ll be too busy looking back over our shoulders to make sure the old life isn’t creeping up on us.

We have to want the Program out of a desire for a new life, not out of a fear of the old. Positive thinking and behavior will be in charge if we are to make any character growth. Every fear encourages negative thinking that can destroy us. Guilt and shame come from the past, just like fear. If those feelings are what drive us, we will never grow.

I will make it a practice to take note of my fears. I will take an inventory of each fear until I understand what caused it. Then I will be able to find a way to work through them.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

God should be sought, but we cannot find God. We can only be found by God.

~ Henri Nouwen ~

In our spiritual development, we get to know the mysteries and paradoxes in our own lives that great thinkers have written about. True spiritual development is an ever-deepening lesson in powerlessness and letting go. We seek God, but our seeking is really only our preparation to receive God. We don’t make the willful decision to find God. We only decide to be open and to stop standing in the way of God’s purposes in our lives.

When a man falls asleep, sleep doesn’t come when he works at it. It comes only when, in his mind, he stops working at anything. He decides to go to bed and fall asleep but then he simply lies back and allows it to happen. If, in his mind, he is still busy working, he will not sleep. Something like that is true in all matters of letting go. We must learn how to stop getting in the way of spiritual influences in our lives, and our only power is to become entirely ready to receive them.

Today I will let go of my self-centered willfulness and be open to die greater powers at work.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Letting go of old hurts makes room for new joys.

~ Sefra Kobrin Pitzele ~

Dwelling on the painful past gets tiresome eventually, but some of us hang on to it longer than others do. However, seeing women move from the bondage of the past to the freedom of living in the present gives us hope. Once we let go of the pain, we discover far more joy in even ordinary experiences. That’s the real surprise.

We have heard sponsors say that when old doors close, new doors open. Letting go of old hurts in order to appreciate new joys falls into the same category. Why not fill our voids with joys rather than recollections of pain?

None of us know how long a life we’ll be blessed with. Accepting how tentative life is helps us decide to seek more joy and less pain. The decision is only the first step, however. Taking control of how we think is the necessary action.

I will experience more joy if I give less thought to old hurts today. The decision is mine, and I can make it and remake it if necessary.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am grateful for a good night’s rest

I had not been sleeping well for a while. Every night I would toss and turn. Then I’d wake up and try to fall back to sleep by watching TV or reading. It was hard to relax when I was so frustrated.

But I’m sleeping better now. I’ve made progress in therapy and got some good tips from my doctor—for example, get some exercise, take your meds at bedtime, avoid caffeine or cigarettes before bedtime.

Sometimes it still takes a while to fall asleep, and sometimes I still have troubling dreams. But usually I make it through the night without waking up. And for this I am deeply grateful. It sounds simple, but getting a good night’s sleep means a lot to me in my recovery.

I will than my higher power for my rest and carefully follow my doctor’s tips to improve my sleep.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Life is a grindstone. But whether it grinds us down or polishes us up depends on us.

~ L. Thomas Holdcroft ~

Self-destructive attitudes keep us stuck. Most of us develop destructive attitudes as children; as adults, we don’t know how to change. We repeat the same patterns over and over, each time feeling more out of control.

But now, in recovery, we’re learning to stop hurting ourselves. We’ve found people who’ve “been there” and can help us learn a new way to live. With our Higher Power’s help, we can turn over our fears and let go of old anger and depression. We’ve found a new beginning.

Making this change requires change in body, mind, and spirit. We’re beginning to take care of our physical needs, changing our mental attitude, and, with the help of our Higher Power, setting out for spiritual growth. We’re replacing self-destructive attitudes with new ones — one day at a time.

Today let me graciously ask for help to change my attitudes. Help me begin to believe in myself.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Living our pre-AA active daily lifestyle was akin to switching seats on the Titanic.

~ Anonymous ~

Instinctively, every living thing struggles to survive in a world that is not always pleasant and often falls short of being ideal. Even those who stood on the decks of the sinking Titanic, who knew in their heads and hearts that their deaths were imminent, clung desperately to any floating object in the hope that they would be rescued.

Recovery presents challenges that can seem over-whelming. You may ask, “How can I survive this?” You may feel, especially in the first few days, as if you are going to die. You may feel that you will fail. You may feel circumstances will never change for the better. But you have survived stressful and difficult times in the past. Although you used drugs or alcohol to numb traumas, past events taught you that you are physically, emotionally, and spiritually much stronger than you think.

Progress in recovery is not made by staying in the same circumstances and expecting them to change, but by changing yourself in order to change your circumstances. You are going someplace, and it may not always be easy to get there. But you have within you the strength to take you there.

The tools of the program give me the tools I need to be strong and to endure.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When they are alone they want to be with others, and when they are with others they want to be alone. After all, human beings are like that.

~ Gertrude Stein ~

We may get discouraged with ourselves because our moods change from one minute to the next. We may make plans for some event we really want to attend, then come right down to the time we’re supposed to leave and not want to go. We may feel content with our job one day, then want to quit and go back to school the next. “What’s going on?” we ask ourselves in frustration.

Because we’re happy and content one minute doesn’t mean we’re going to feel the same way later. When we’re starting on our recovery, our mood swings will be very dramatic. We aren’t accustomed to expressing our feelings, so it’s only natural that they all want to be heard at once.

It’s okay to change our feelings or opinions about something. As time goes on, our mood swings will lessen. But tonight, we need to remember we are growing and experiencing in a way we never have before. Patience with ourselves and our conflicting feelings will help us accept where we are.

I need to remember it’s okay for me to feel.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Discovering beauty

When we were using drugs we had only artificial vision, artificial experiences. We did not care how beautiful life was around us; we cared only about getting high and staying high. Now, as we grow in awareness, we are like little children discovering the world all over again.

We find there is more excitement in each discovery we make than there ever was in any high. We find that this excitement is real and that it cannot be taken from us.

Am I rediscovering the world around me?

Higher Power, I pray to stay clean and sober so that I can be present and fully aware.

Today I will look for the beauty in

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Showing up for life. Being blessed with the rebirth that recovery brings. One day at a time.

~ BETTY FORD ~

Newcomer

Chronologically, I’m a grown-up, but in some ways I’m far behind. It feels as if I’m growing up all over again.

Sponsor

Some people in the program say that our emotional devel-opment stopped at the point when we became active in our addictions: if we abused drugs beginning at age sixteen, then we’ve entered recovery with the emotional development of a sixteen-year-old.

That’s an oversimplification, but it points the way to a truth. Most of us enter recovery inexperienced at whatever aspects of our lives we avoided through addiction. We may feel awkward in social contexts; we may have missed out on education; we may not have found appropriate, fulfilling work. Some of us still have to learn the basics of self-care; others have numerous adult-world accomplishments, but no dependable sense of self-esteem. At times we may feel as if we’re part child, part adolescent, part mature person rolled into one.

We’re not stupid or shallow. We’re complex people, each with our own histories, strengths, and needs. We’re capable of profound change. Happily, we’re not alone in our struggles to mature and become integrated individuals.

Today, I have patience with myself as I learn more about who I am and how to live.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

In Step Eight we “made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.”

It is a lot easier to list those persons whom we have harmed by some intentional and direct action than it is to list those whom we have hurt by acts of omission.

We have not only done those things which we ought not to have done, but we have left undone those things which we ought to have done.

Carelessness, neglect, lack of appreciation, and thoughtlessness can hurt as much as a kick in the teeth.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Serenity is God’s garden. The entrance is though our hearts.

2) We together can do what I alone cannot.

3) HOPE: Hearing Other Peoples’ Experiences

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Meeting Prayer No. 2

Our Heavenly Father, we ask Your blessings on this meeting.

Please bless the spirit and the purpose of this group.

Give us strength to follow this Program according to Your will and in all humility.

Forgive us for yesterday, and grant us courage for today and hope for tomorrow.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CLAIM YOUR NOURISHMENT

I had an amusing experience when I first came to America. Passing an attractive-looking restaurant, I went inside, and selecting a table, sat down and waited. Nothing happened. I continued to wait. All around me, people were enjoying their food, and only I was left out. After a while the truth dawned on me—I was in a cafeteria. (This system had not yet made its appearance in England.) I then realized that while there was plenty of food to be obtained, one had to go forward and claim it for oneself, or go without.

The universe is run exactly on the lines of a cafeteria. Unless you claim—mentally—what you want, you may sit and wait forever.

Ho, everyone that thirsteth, come ye to the waters, and he that hath no money; come ye, buy, and eat . . . (Isaiah 55:1)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Perfect

Heaven is not a place, and it is not a time. Heaven is being perfect.

~ from Jonathan Livingston Seagull, by Richard Bach ~

I used to think I was a perfectionist,” Larry confessed. “I was constantly finding flaws and errors that other people overlooked. If there were many aspects of a job that were well done and one that wasn’t, I would point out that one. But now I realize I was an imperfectionist. If I was a perfectionist, I would have found perfection everywhere I looked; instead, I saw only imperfection.”

Whatever we focus on, we will find more of. The world we live in is the one we choose by virtue of the vision we use. Are you a perfectionist or an imperfectionist?

Jack and his wife Elaine were waiting in a lineup of cars on the Cross Bronx Expressway, sandwiched in an alternate merge at a construction zone. “This is hell!” Jack complained inwardly. “We’re creeping along at a snail’s pace.”

Then Elaine pointed out, “Isn’t this wonderful!”

“What’s so wonderful about this?” Jack asked.

“It’s really inspiring to see how people are cooperating here. One car goes ahead from this lane, and then one from the other lane. It shows me that people know how to work together when there is a challenge.” We can discover good in any situation if we choose it.

Help me find You in the events of daily life.

I am committed to beauty, and I find it everywhere I look.

[majestyjo]

April 15

Step by Step

Today, focus on rebuilding a positive and realistic self-esteem if I doubt or fear moving on because I think I may fail. In recovery, there is little to fear because we have already been through the most fearful place of all. But if I am afraid that I will stumble, fall short of a goal or cannot do what I must, I risk not only stagnation but possibly relapse if my self-confidence is so poor that I deceive myself into thinking sobriety offers little more than what drinking provided. And I cannot compare myself and where I am in recovery to anyone else, either to reinforce my poor self-esteem or to mitigate it. If I need more than the guidance of my higher power to overcome reluctance or fear to move ahead, I can compare myself to where I was before recovery. Today, fear and worry will not disable me from progressing. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

LESSONS FROM PAIN

The will of God will never take you where the grace of God will not protect you.

~ Anonymous ~

Today we are living free from compulsions and addictions, but that happiness won’t ever let us forget the times we cried from pain. We went through a lot of suffering in order to surrender. All that suffering wouldn’t matter if we hadn’t become willing to make a spiritual change. We learned valuable lessons from the pain.

In recovery, we learn that pain changes our lives. We gain an understanding of honest values from our suffering. Until we stopped hurting, we couldn’t make progress toward a richer life and appreciate the gift of love and service.

I have learned that happiness is getting away from suffering. Even to crave happiness is painful. Finding happiness helps me get rid of pain and find peace of mind.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.

~ Doug Larson ~

Life is never just one thing. It is quite possible to feel optimistic and happy even when some things are not right with us. An optimistic outlook gives us energy to handle the harder things that we have to deal with. Research shows that people who have a positive attitude have a stronger immune system, are healthier, live longer, and are even more likely to recover from serious illness.

To believe in hopeful outcomes is largely a matter of choice. Many of us have experienced big disappointments and defeats in life. But having come this far, we can look back and see that somehow we had the capacity to deal with it. The Second Step guides us to believe in hopeful possibilities. We can’t say that things will al-ways turn out just the way we hope, but that we can cope with whatever happens.

Today I choose to believe that a Power greater than myself can help me deal with life, and I have reason to be optimistic.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Work for justice. Struggle for forgiveness.
Choose love.

~ Patricia Benson ~

Justice, forgiveness, and love sound far loftier than they are. Developing these qualities requires only that we live as we think God wants us to live. It’s as simple as that. Admittedly, when we have wanted to punish a significant person in our lives, we have often preferred “justifiable” anger or resentment over love. However, the emotional hangover that has followed the expression of our outrage has diminished any pleasure we might have gained.

Our inclination to forgive other people and our-selves, coupled with our decision to love rather than punish those who irritate us, seems to grow daily. Our changed perspective comes from our willingness to grow in recovery. We can be as peace-filled and as loving as we want. We’re in charge!

I will stay in control of who I am today. I can fulfill God’s wishes.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to channel my anger

I have a short fuse again these days. Suddenly I feel like I want to explode, like I want to smash things. I wish I knew what sets me off—work? My illnesses? I don’t feel like myself. It scares me and I wish I could cool off.

When I told my therapist I was concerned about my strong feelings, she began by assuring me that it’s OK to be angry, for whatever reason. She explained that anger itself is not an issue, it’s what I do with it. Then we explored ways to release my anger in order to stay balanced, safe, and strong. Dealing with resentment and anger are important issues in my recovery.

I will ask my higher helper for courage to accept my anger and deal with it in a healthy way.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I know all except myself.

~ Francois Villon ~

We’ve all had friends who give wonderful advice to everyone but themselves, and we all have a little of that in ourselves, too. It’s so easy to sit back and see what other people do wrong with their lives. The missteps and mistakes are so clear, the triumphs so obvious to us. Sometimes we give advice; other times we simply observe.

When it comes to our own lives, we’re often masters of denial. We can’t see what we’re doing at all. We bumble along thinking we’re doing one thing, only to discover when it’s too late that our real behavior has been quite different.

But we’re luckier than most people; we have a program of recovery that helps us realize what we’re doing before it’s too late. With the help of our Twelve Step program, our Higher Power, and our sponsor, we can get a “bird’s-eye-view” of where we are, how we’re doing, and how we can change to live a better life. With help from our Higher Power, we can risk taking a clear look at ourselves. And one day at a time, we’ll come to understand ourselves, our motives, and our behavior better. We may never know ourselves as well as we’d like, but now we can begin the exciting search for self-awareness, honesty, and serenity.

Today help me seek the truth about myself without fear or denial.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Mercury and the Woodsman

A woodsman was chopping trees for firewood, but lost his grip and watched the axe sail into a nearby river. He began to weep, for without his axe he could not keep his house warm or cook food.

Mercury decided to help and dove into the river. He brought up a golden axe. “Is this your axe?” Mercury asked, but the woodsman shook his head. Mercury dove again and brought up a silver axe. “Is this your axe?” he asked, but the woodsman again shook his head. Then Mercury brought up a weather-beaten wooden axe. The woodsman told him, “That is my axe,” Mercury rewarded the woodsman’s honesty by giving him two more axes.

The next day, the woodsman told his story to a friend.

The friend went to the river, tossed in his axe, and began to weep. Mercury dove into the river and brought up a golden axe. The man eagerly held out his hand for the axe. But Mercury knew the man was lying and returned the golden axe to the water, leaving the man with none.

The moral of the story: Honesty is the best policy.

When you embellish the truth or make up stories, the less trust others will have in you.

I will be truthful in my words and actions at all times.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Let us move on, and step out boldly, though it be into the night, and we can scarcely see the way. A Higher Intelligence than the mortal sees the road before us. We do not have to strive for good, but only to go forward and possess it. Good awaits us at every step.

~ Charles B. Newcomb ~

Remember how energized we feel after a good night’s sleep, and how a sunny morning helps us forget the bad thoughts of yesterday? We can feel that same energy and sense of hope right now even though the night is here. The Higher Power we prayed to this morning for strength, hope, and guidance for the day is with us right now, ready to help us relax tonight.

Take a moment to look upon nightfall as a new beginning. Think of new things to do tomorrow. Try a new meeting or volunteer for a group activity. Resolve to start a Fourth Step inventory or ask someone we respect to be our sponsor. New beginnings can happen, if we keep our eyes and ears and hearts open to the messages of our Higher Power.

What good things would l like to have happen to me? How can I use my Higher Power to help me?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Relying on faith

With our newfound recovery, we may find ourselves facing new situations with confidence. Our confidence must be supported by faith, however.

When trials arise, we realize how power-less we are and our confidence may crumble. Only faith can rescue us. Confidence is men-tal and emotional; faith is spiritual. Let us examine ourselves and see whether we are relying on confidence or on faith.

Is my faith strong enough?

Higher Power, increase my faith and courage so that I may face life’s trials.

I will seek to deepen my faith today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The readiness is all.

~ WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE ~

Newcomer

I went to two different Step meetings this week, in different parts of town, and both of them were on the Fourth Step. I keep hearing that “there are no coincidences.” Does this mean I’m supposed to start the Fourth Step now? How do I know if I’m ready?

Sponsor

First of all, I’m glad to hear that you’re going to Step meet-ings, and I encourage you to keep it up. Your willingness has brought you a long way already, and it continues to be the key.

In approaching a new Step, I find it useful to ask myself if I’ve taken the Steps that precede it in a complete, whole-hearted way.

I review Step One and remember why I’m on this path of recovery in the first place: addiction brought me to spiritual depths I don’t want to sink to again.

Reviewing Step Two reminds me that I’m not alone, and that I have faith that I’ll be given what I need to become a whole and free person again.

Step Three reminds me that I’ve made a decision. I’m willing to do what’s necessary for recovery and to trust the process. I remember that I only have to do my part; my progress in recovery isn’t entirely up to me. My Higher Power will do the rest. When I reach Step Four, I trust that in the process of writing about the events of my addictive life, I’ll be taken care of.

Today, I bring willingness and an open mind to the next step in my recovery. I relax and trust that I am not alone.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Men may call themselves atheists, agnostics, unbelievers, or what have you, but the fact still remains that man must believe in something.

If he thinks his own presence here on earth is simply an accident in the forces of nature, then he must believe that the forces of nature are able to create him with all his delicately adjusted organism. To do this the forces of nature would need to have intelligence in a very high degree and in addition there must be a tremendous creative force to carry out the dictates of that intelligence. He, himself, could not do this so this force of nature is superior in a vast degree to himself. Bingo! He has found the God of his understanding, let him call Him what he may.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Align your actions so they are in agreement with the picture you paint of yourself at meetings.

2) AA: Experience the difference, where the difference is experience.

3) The difference between a rut and a grave is its depth.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Meeting Prayer No. 3

God bless this meeting and the members gathered here tonight.

Help us to make this group a haven of strength and comfort, giving to all who seek help here the beauty and friendliness of home, which shall be as a shield against temptation of all kinds and against loneliness and despair.

Bless those who are going forth from this house to fight the gallant fight, to know suffering, and bless those who come here to rest, those who must readjust themselves to face life once more.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CLAIM YOUR WINGS

To me the butterfly teaches the most important lesson that we human beings ever have to learn. You all know his story. He lived what seemed to him a very long time as a worm—what we call the humble caterpillar. Now the life of a caterpillar could be taken as the very type and symbol of restriction. He lives on a green leaf in the forest, and that is about all he knows.

Then one day the little caterpillar finds certain stirrings going o within himself. The old green leaf, for some reason, no longer seems sufficient. He becomes moody and discontented, but—and this is the vital point—it I a divine discontent. He feels the need for a bigger, finer, and more interesting life. His instinct tells him that where there is true desire there must be fulfillment.

And so the wonderful thing happens: the butterfly emerges beautiful, graceful, now endowed with wings, and instead of crawling about on a restricted leaf, he can soar above the trees, above the forest itself—free, unrestricted, his own True Self.

. . . Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the thing which God hath prepared for them that love him (Corinthians 2:9)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

How to Bless the IRS

Love is the only power. Love is the only way.

~ Rabbi David Zeller ~

As Alice was writing checks to pay her bills last April, she penned a note of blessing on the memo line of each check, as is her custom. When Alice came to the check due to the Internal Revenue Services (IRS) for her tax payment, she asked herself, “Do I really want to bless the IRS? Would anyone there receive the gift?”

After some reflection, Alice decided that there are no exceptions to the law of love. “Perhaps,” she reasoned, “the IRS is in greater need of blessing than most of the other people and companies I am paying.” On the memo line of her check, Alice inscribed, “Peace and joy be with you.”

Several months later as Alice was going through her canceled checks, she noticed the check she had sent to the IRS. On the back of the check, below the institutional stamp, she read these words, written by hand: “And with you, too!”

Somehow Alice’s blessing found its way to someone’s heart. Consider what a gift this was to the person who received it! The IRS is probably not the most delightful place to work. Hardly anyone enjoys paying taxes, and I expect that IRS employees are not the recipients of many blessings from their constituents. Can you imagine the pleasant surprise of the person who processed that check? Perhaps it changed her entire day. Perhaps that person went on to offer some extra kindness, caring, or forgiveness to the next person she dealt with. I am certain that Alice’s blessing went a long way.

Any activity in life can be elevated to the level of blessing. The situations we encounter are templates upon which we imprint our heart’s intentions. Every moment we make the choice between love and fear. Nothing in this world is outside the power of transformation by way of a loving heart. When we choose love, we bring the world closer to heaven. Fear makes the world hell. The choice is ours.

Help me to remember that everyone I encounter is a child of God who will respond to pure love.

I use all situations as opportunities to prove and celebrate the power of love.

[majestyjo]

April 16

Step by Step

Today, start to forgive myself and let go of any guilt I harbor for failing or not getting the chance to make amends to someone who is no longer able to hear them. If someone I injured is not able to receive my amends, may God grant me the comfort in remembering the good I hopefully showed that person before active alcoholism inflicted its damage. And if I can no longer go to that person although I wish I could, let my amend be progress in recovery and not imposing injury or hurt on anyone else. Forgiving has to begin at home, and without forgiving myself, I probably cannot “allow” anyone else to forgive me. Today, I take responsibility for harm I did the person to whom I can no longer make amends, and my sincerest apology may be progress in recovery. There will be no amends if I let my guilt take up the bottle again. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SEIZE THE DAY

Possibilities and miracles are one and the same.

~ Anonymous ~

Many of us have seen happiness as a goal we couldn’t find. When we were children, we were taught that “life is a hard row to hoe.” We carried that over into our adult lives.

Seize the day! We let too many of our days just slide by. None of those hours can be replaced. Why worry over past failures if there is a victory to win? Why keep thinking about our faults when we could be practicing virtues instead?

Seize the day! Hold each moment tight and look at each one with wide-open eyes and mind. They are our lives, special to each of us. The moments pass swiftly into memory. Let those memories be good ones, filled with joys large and small.

Yesterday’s unhappiness can’t be changed, but today’s happiness is my own responsibility.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Anger is a great energizer if you don’t get stuck in it

~ Lavonne Stewart ~

Many of us have to face up to our anger and the negative ways we have handled it. For most men, the real problem is not anger itself, but how we express it. Some of us never express it; others get abusive when we express it. Either way calls for more growth. Often, people confuse anger with abuse. They may say, “I just have to express my feelings, and when I’m angry, I have to let it out.” Other people say, “Anger is so hurtful. I will avoid it at all costs.”

Healing requires that we look to see the sources of our anger, how we have expressed it or failed to, and then learn how to say our feelings honestly and with respect. When we see what we are actually angry about, it gives us energy, it motivates us. It’s a life force. There is no rule that we have to show our anger in destructive ways. We can be flat-out angry at someone we love and still maintain the respect we hold for that person. It is possible to learn to look at a friend and say, “I feel angry about this and I’m here to tell you about it be-cause I care about our friendship.”

Today I will accept my angry feelings as a source of life energy, and I will find honest, respectful ways to show it

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Everything passes, and as I flow with this river of highs and lows, I become calm. I trust my experience and the life force guiding me.

~ Ruthie Albert ~

Everything passes. There is perhaps no greater comfort when we’re caught in the throes of trauma than the knowledge that this too shall pass. We lived many years without this knowledge as we struggled to change the unchangeable. Unfortunately, the only thing that changed was our level of frustration: it got higher. Now we know that we can patiently wait for a situation to pass. Nothing lasts forever.

The good times pass too, of course. We hope to hold on to them, but the same principle applies. The minutes tick by, carrying us to new experiences. What we need to learn will become known to us through both the good times and the struggles. They all will pass, having prepared us for the highs and lows that wait to serve us.

I am at peace with the knowledge that everything passes. My needs will be met today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am accepting my dual disorder

I know I have an addiction and I know that addiction is an illness, a disease. But it’s hard for me to believe that I have an “emotional,” or “psychiatric,” or “mental” illness. I always pictured such people in a hospital or institution. I thought of them as “crazy.”

These days I am finding out how mistaken I’ve been. Such people are not crazy, they’re not always in a hospital or institutionalized. More likely, they’re with me at work, with me at the store, with me in church. They are like me and I am like them. In fact, I am one of them.

I will write out an affirmation that reads, “I am more like other people than I am different.”

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.

~ Psalms 90:12 ~

Modem technology lets us record the past and predict the future, but the time that is really alive — the time when we’re really alive — is now, right this moment.

Up until now we may have tried to block out, distort, or gloss over what was happening. We may be ashamed of the past or fear the future, while we completely miss the real meaning and action of the moment we’re in.

Recovery gives us the tools to live in the moment by helping us keep it simple, put first things first, and practice “easy does it.” We are more able to see the joy of living this day.

Knowing we are no longer alone, knowing we have the comfort of our Higher Power, each moment gives us the confidence to stay alive in the present in a healthy, sober way — one day at a time.

Today help me realize I don’t have the events of yesterday or tomorrow in my grasp right now. Show me the joy of today.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

What is the use of climbing Mount Everest? If you cannot understand that there is something in man which responds to the challenge of this mountain and goes out to meet it . . . then you won’t see why we go.

~ George Leigh Mallory ~

In experiments with deer mice in captivity, researchers discovered the animals exhibited behaviors that favored decision making. For example, the mice were able to control the lighting in their cages. The mice preferred dim lighting, but if researchers made the cage completely dark, the mice would make the light as bright as possible. If the researchers turned the lights up bright, the mice would make the cage dark. “They cared about choice more than comfort,” wrote the researchers. “When given the opportunity to manage their environment, they battled fiercely for control.”

When you were using, your habit held you captive by its power over your life. But when you resolved to be free from your addiction, you regained control of your life.

Your daily commitment to the program is one of choice. Abstinence provides a foundation from which your freedom emanates and from which you can make choices— both in your recovery, and in your life.

Today I am grateful for the release from the imprisonment of my addiction. I am free from its control, and free to make choices.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I am more involved in unlearning than learning. I’m having to unlearn all the garbage that people have laid on me.

~ Leo Buscaglia ~

What are some of the messages we got while growing up? That we were awful people, or stupid, or unemployable, or lazy, or unlikeable? These messages may have turned into beliefs as we grew older, and we’ve carried these horrible, negative burdens into adulthood.

Today we may have seen ourselves acting like children again. We may have done or said things to get approval and acceptance. We may have been less than honest with others so they wouldn’t see the real us – and perhaps not like what they saw.

We can start to change some of the things we’ve learned. We don’t have to do anything unless it is what we need to do for our healthy growth. We don’t have to be someone we aren’t. We can be totally honest with ourselves and others even at the risk of possible rejection. We can speak our minds and feel our feelings.

I am in charge of my lesson plan. Who are the ones I choose to teach me?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Working on our goals

Our goal of staying clean and sober is a good one. At the spiritual level it is clear, but at the practical level some of us lack a commitment to it. Some of us even believe that the program won’t work for us.

Such a belief is only an excuse not to realize our goals. We must work hard to hang on to our goals when fear, selfishness, and lack of faith get in our way.

Am I working on my goals?

Higher Power, help my unbelief so that I may understand you on both a practical and a spiritual level.

The goals I will work on today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.

~ SOREN KIERKEGAARD ~

Newcomer

When I look at Step Four, the phrase “the exact nature of our wrongs” sounds so grim and old-fashioned. I don’t know if I can face my past that way.

Sponsor

We have a phrase—“the arrogant worm”—to express the way some of us think of ourselves: one moment we’re too important to take the Steps; another moment we’re the worst things that ever walked the face of the earth. Both are distortions. I’m a human being living among other human beings. I’m not a saint, but I’m not a worm, either. Words I’ve said or failed to say, and actions I’ve taken or not taken have had an impact both on other people and on myself. Chances are that the behavior I’d most like to forget is the behavior most important to include in my inventory,

The point of this Step isn’t just to list our faults, nor is it to beat ourselves up for them. Nor is it to complain about the ways we’ve been victimized by people or circumstances. It is to look at where our addictions have taken us.

In recovery, I cherish my innate sense of right and wrong. Today, it leads me to take actions for which I esteem myself.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Man is the only animal that smiles and he is the only one that has need of it. Not that God provided more for the animal kingdom than He did for us, but man, through the stupid misuse of his will power and his other advantages, has brought misfortunes upon himself that would be unendurable but for the healing balm of smiles and a sense of humor.

No man is completely beaten as long as he can smile, and we know from past experience that we can wade out of most our messes on the stepping stones of good humored grins.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) My Gratitude Speaks When I Care and I Share With Others the NA Way.

2) Serenity is not freedom from the storm but peace within the storm.

3) If there is someone weaker than you, be kind to them. If there is someone stronger than you, be kind to yourself.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Amazing Grace

Amazing grace! How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost, but now am fond,
Was blind, but now I see.

‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears relieved.
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils, and snares,
I have already come.
‘Tis grace that brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home.

When we’ve been here ten thousand years,
Bright shining as the sun,
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise
Than when we’d first begun.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

TAKE STOCK OF YOUR RELIGION

What has our religion done for you? For years probably, you have been attending church, reading spiritual books, studying the Bible. Now I suggest that you have a spiritual stocktaking. Ask yourself what difference religion has made in your life, in your home, in your affairs. How much peace of mind has it given you? How much courage? How much understanding? How much opportunity for service? For, make no mistake, real religion does give all these things.

If your spiritual stocktaking does not turn out to be satisfactory, I believe that you will find the explanation to lie in the following law: What you put into your religion, that you get out of it.

If you put in 5 percent of yourself, you will receive a 5 percent dividend or demonstration. If you put in 20 percent of yourself, you will receive a 20 percent demonstration. Complete returns call for a 100 percent investment.

Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might . . . (Ecclesiastes 9:10).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

In Their Best Light

Treat your friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light.

~ Jennie Jerome Churchill ~

It was probably a grace that Brenda passed away, I thought. My elderly neighbor was a severely addicted alcoholic, and, from what I saw, her life had little meaning. The few times I attempted to converse with Brenda I looked into her eyes, and it appeared that no one was home. She had to be in a better place now, I imagined. Then I talked to Marvin, a man whom Brenda and her husband had taken in as a caretaker. Marvin felt a great sense of loss in Brenda’s death.

“She was so good to me,” Marvin tearfully confided. “Like a mother. I will miss her a lot.” Through Marvin’s words, I gained a profound realization: I saw only one limited aspect of Brenda’s life. Even while I judged her life as empty, she had riches. She loved someone, and someone loved her. Her life, broken as it appeared to me, was a blessing to at least one other person. In spite of the ravages I beheld, God lived through her.

The Bible tells us not to judge—not because we should not judge, but because we cannot judge. When we hold a judgment about someone, we are focusing on one moment from one angle. At another moment or from another angle, we would see an entirely different person or story.

While visiting a children’s zoo, I watched a man become very abusive at the snack bar, ranting and raving at the clerk over a minor mishap. I thought, This guy is one ornery hombre. A few minutes later I saw a man feeding a fawn through a fence. As he tenderly stroked the deer’s nose and gave it love, he reminded me of St. Francis. When he turned his head, I saw that it was the same man who created the scene at the snack bar.

When we release judgment, we find God in every person. Moreover, we free ourselves to be lovable and forgivable. Judgment is illusion, and love is real.

I pray to see Your children as You do, through the eyes of love and appreciation.

I focus on the good and let all else go.

[majestyjo]

April 17

Step by Step

Today, if I have avoided honesty in a relationship that began while drinking but now is broken because I have become sober and the other person hasn’t, I must confront the possibility that I have out-grown the relationship if the other person chooses to keep drinking. Just like the drinking alcoholic who lost his family and gained sobriety but didn’t get his family back, so it goes with other relationships. As difficult and painful the decision, the choice may be that my own recovery and sobriety are at the risk if I stay with a partner who is not ready or willing to get sober. And an unfortunate and unintended product of sobering up may be the reality that I don’t like the spouse or partner with whom alcohol was the tie that binds. A tough choice may boil down to the fact that I can’t sacrifice my sobriety to salvage a relationship that, in recovery, may not be healthy. Today, if I have to end a relationship because I am becoming healthier and the other person isn’t, I need only to look to my sobriety for validation. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SENSES

How good is man’s life, the mere living! How fit to employ all the heart and the soul and the senses forever in joy!

~ Robert Browning ~

Our senses are opened up and deepened in our recovery. We see, hear, smell, taste, and touch more strongly. We understand better. There is a beauty to life we could not see before.

We see order where once there was only confusion. We hear music where once there was only noise. We taste sweetness where once there was only bitterness. We smell freshness where once all was stale. We feel softness where once all was rough.

We seem to have changed into a higher form as a result of our Step work. We no longer feel like a wild animal caught in a hunter’s trap. We act more and more like human beings. We have an awareness of life that makes us capable of being creative.

I have come to see that the Twelve Steps are about the recovery of my whole person.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Discipline is remembering what you want.

~ David Campbell ~

Not everyone chooses recovery easily. We were attached to our addictions and codependency, even if we didn’t want their consequences. They were not only our masters; we were also loyal to them. They gave us comfort, pleasure, and a high that nothing else could match. So where did we find motivation to change?

Somewhere within our souls we longed for some-thing of greater quality. We didn’t want to sacrifice our future for the fleeting pleasures or false escapes. We saw that our actions were ruining our own lives and the lives of our loved ones. We always thought we would change someday, and even while our lives were careening out of control, we promised ourselves to change tomorrow or sometime in the future. It was our greater vision, our longing for a better life, that led us to try the Twelve Step recovery program. Out of wanting something better we found the motivation to enter recovery.

Today I know that deep in my soul lies a desire to be a good man.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

What thoughts are you willing to give up your happiness for?

~ Jane Nelson ~

Far too quickly we put the responsibility for our happiness on others. We pout and blame and cry, but our lives never change. This doesn’t have to be true, however. We can decide to follow the example of the happier women we are discovering in this Twelve Step program. The difference between them and us is their willingness to be responsible for every thought they have, every feeling they harbor. It’s a simple change in mind-set, but it affects every aspect of their lives.

We are just as capable of finding happiness as any of the women we have grown to admire here. They have taken back their power from the others In their lives. They let no one decide how they are going to feel or think about a situation. They take charge of themselves. It’s not all that difficult or there would be far fewer successes. Let’s try it today.

I can purposefully decide how I’ll think and feel today. No one else’s behavior will control my own.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can’t help it, I’m changing

When I finally relapsed, I was despondent. I had done all I could do to stay abstinent and stable. I believed that since nothing had worked for me, nothing would work for me. I was tired of trying and tired of holding on. I gave up.

However, in giving up I learned an important concept: I cannot control change. As hard as I might try, I cannot stop change from happening. This makes me more willing to be patient, more willing to let time help the healing. Life is change. And though I may struggle and feel like a failure, I am in fact, changing. Being patient, holding on, is an important part of change.

Today I will do what I can for my recovery—and then let go.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

If I only see my mistakes,
I can’t stay sober very long.

~ Ben N. ~

Many of us review our days each evening just before sleep. This review can be a trial or a delight, depending on the focus. One way is to tote up only mistakes and errors, groaning about what we did wrong and how awful we are. What a self-defeating, depressing thing to do! Although we cannot live by bread alone, we cannot live by vinegar alone either. Looking at only the negatives can discourage us right into relapse. If we’re doing so badly, we reason, why continue with recoveiy?

Instead, we try concentrating on the good things we did, no matter how small. Did we make someone smile? Did we lighten someone’s burden with a kind word? Did we give a word of hope to a friend? Did we avoid a problem? Did we squelch an angry response? Did we forgive an enemy, eat a well- balanced meal, make amends to someone we had harmed in the past, go to a meeting, get a sponsor, tell the truth instead of making an excuse?

As small as they are, these are the real indicators of our progress in recovery. They are valid “good deeds” we can be proud of. When we review our day tonight, we can give ourselves the pat on the back we deserve. We’ve earned it.

Today help me be gentle with myself. Help me recognize the good things in my life.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I don’t understand people who hide from their past. Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now.

~ Sophia Loren ~

Two monks were walking when they came upon a woman waiting to cross a stream. One of the monks picked up the woman in his arms and carried her across the stream. The monks then resumed their walking. About a mile down the road, the other monk scolded the first. “We are celibate,” he said. “We are not supposed to even look at a woman, let alone pick one up and carry her across a stream. How could you possibly do that?” The first monk replied, “I put that woman down a mile back. Are you still carrying her around with you?”

Even though the past is gone, it brought you to where you are today. Without it, you would not be able to envision and work toward a better future. The Steps of the program teach that your past is an integral part of your recovery. You need to remember those you have harmed and make amends to them. You need to admit that your life was unmanageable. And you need to use the past as a platform from which you can seek forgiveness from your Higher Power.

Today I embrace and accept the past as a valuable teacher.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Are we living in the present, or are we still reliving the past day? If we’re still looking backward, there are no surprises, no new wonders. It’s like viewing a television rerun – we already know the plot, the characters, and the dialogue.

Today is done. Whatever mistakes, confusions, disappointments or problems that occurred are also done. Nothing we do right now can alter the happenings of the day. We can best use our time now by paying attention to the present.

Tonight we can look around us at the here and now. We can turn off the reruns in our minds and get set for the new shows to come. We can start fresh and new – right now.

Can I let go of the events of the day?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Struggling alone

Each of us is a struggling soul. We had to struggle with our addictions for some time before we found this program, and eventually each struggling soul must face the realities of life. If we face the trials of life alone, we will fall.

But if we make our will one with our Higher Power in the Third Step, nothing will be too much to bear. After taking this Step, we will realize that we are one with God and that we don’t have to struggle alone any longer.

Am I still struggling alone?

May I turn my will and my life over to my Higher Power.

The struggles I will ask God for help with today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Happy for us if the grace of God enables us to live so that we retain innocency and freshness of character down to old age.

~ MARY ANN WENDELL ~

Newcomer

I’ve always been down on myself—that’s my problem. When I look at the Steps and see “searching and fearless moral inventory/’ “the exact nature of our wrongs,” and “defects of character,” the language seems so judgmental. It depresses me to think of myself in such negative terms.

Sponsor

Like you, I found certain phrases in the Steps off-putting at first. I changed them in my mind: for “wrongs,” I substituted “things I would like to have done differently”; for “defects,” I substituted “old habits and ways of reacting that I’d like to be free of.” I needed the gentlest possible approach; I’d been beating myself up for as long as I could remember.

The Steps aren’t asking us to blame or to punish ourselves. Many of us accept the idea that we inherited a predisposition for our addictions and that things that happened in our lives provided opportunities for addiction to take hold. Fortunately, recovery offers us the opportunity to see ourselves with clarity and compassion, to free ourselves to become the people we’ve always wanted to be. We can work the Twelve Steps with infinite gentleness and caring, for ourselves and for the truth.

Today, my compassion for myself opens me to the gentleness of the program.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Loneliness drives more people to the Gin Mill than almost any other single factor – perhaps even the compulsion to drink.

In the old days when our society was objectionable to all our old friends, we would from sheer boredom go to the bar just to talk to someone. Anyone’s conversation was preferable to our thoughts. The drink was frequently only incidental.

Boredom is still one of our worst enemies. If you have an AA club, there is always some guy you can try to help. Regardless of your effect on him, the experience is bound to help you and will relieve you of your blues.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) HOPE: Helping Open People’s Eyes

2) An action beats a feeling.

3) Doing one thing different, can make the difference.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

High Flight

Oh I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings,
Sunward I’ve climbed and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds—and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of—wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov’ring there
I’ve chased the shouting wind along and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue
I’ve topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark nor even eagle flew.
And, while with silent, lifting mind I’ve trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

SEEING CHRIST IN OTHERS

We often hear the expression “saluting the Christ in him,” or “seeing the Christ in him,” and we may well ask ourselves what that phrase really means. It is simply the practical application of the rule of Jesus Christ.

Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgement (John 7:24)

Each of us has a divine Self that is spiritual and perfect but that is never seen on this plane. That is the true man, God’s man, and is what we sometimes call “the Christ within.” Now whenever you dwell upon or realize the presence of the Christ within yourself or within anyone else, outer appearances begin at once to improve. If somebody displeases you, silently salute the Christ within him. If someone says against John Smith’s character, salute the Christ in him, refuse to discuss the manner, and of course do not repeat it.

The more often you salute the Christ in others, the sooner you will find Him in yourself.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Don’t Think

A man needs a little madness, or else he never dares cut the rope and be free.

~ Zorba the Greek ~

Are you really going to jump from there?” I asked Frank as he stood poised on a rock at the top of the waterfall. “Sure, it’s fun—you’re going to join me, aren’t you?”

I looked over the edge of the precipice. “I don’t know.”

“You’ll love it!” Frank exclaimed, and took a flying swan dive into the pool below.

I stood atop the ridge looking down, adrenaline shooting through my system. “Can I do this?” I asked myself. An inner voice replied, “Don’t think about it—just do it.” I gazed for a few more seconds and felt as if a big hand was nudging me from behind. So without further delay, I leaped—and loved it.

Somewhere inside me I knew that if I jumped, I would enjoy it, and I also knew that if I thought about it, I would not do it. Sometimes we have to override our reasoning mind and just go with the energy at hand. As I climbed back up to the top of the ridge, I wondered how many times I have used my mind to talk me out of doing things that would make me happy.

I am not suggesting that you do anything foolish or do something that would be injurious to you. The place of knowingness inside you is always giving you good advice. When your head is in a quandary and your heart says yes, follow your heart. Use your mind to empower you, not limit you. The heart without the head is chaotic, and the head without the heart is a tyrant. Break free of the tyranny of overthinking, and become as a little child. That is how you get back into heaven.

Raise the volume of my inner voice of truth, that I may walk the way appointed by wisdom.

I have a passionate delight for doing what is right.

[caressa222]

April 18



Step by Step



Today, recommit as a trusting member of the program and its members who confide their Fourth Step and all other communications. We must treat as private all things any members share and cannot share or “gossip” with anyone whatever another member says even if there is no stated promise of confidentiality. Failure to treat as private all matters involving any member is a show of disrespect to both the other person and the program, and disqualifies us as an ethical 12th-Stepper. In recovery, we cannot expect that
what we share will be a private communication if we do not convey the same respect of others. Today, sobriety carries the responsibility of loyalty, trust and respect of the program and its members – and they have it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SECOND LIVES

We are here to add what we can to, not get what we can from, life.

~ Sir William Osler ~

Many of us used to moan, “I wish I were dead.” Our addictions and obsessions made us hate ourselves. Other people scorned and pitied us. We wanted to die. We hoped that a lie after death would give us rest from our constant battle with compulsions. But today we can find a better answer.

There is life before death. Those of us who once cried out, “nobody cares,” have found loving, caring friends who share our problems and help us find the answers. They guide us daily through wonderful adventures in living. We all receive great truths in recovery.

I have been given the chance to live two lives. The cruel one has gone. The second one is rich with blessings. Nothing must tempt me to return to the old.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Thought is action in rehearsal

~ Sigmund Freud ~

We sometimes indulge ourselves in fantasies and images of things we would like to do, or in euphoric recall of what we did in the past. Thoughts are powerful forces, and the ways we use them will shape our development. An Olympic diver creates vivid images of the perfect dive in his mind as part of his training be-cause his thoughts help him perform at the crucial moment. Even in recovery, we are sometimes tempted to revisit former ecstatic moments from our using days, or to dream about a return to using but with better control the next time. We need to keep in mind that these thoughts serve as rehearsals for later action. They only weaken our recovery.

What kind of thoughts shall we cultivate in our minds? We can picture ourselves feeling relaxed and peaceful, having the craving lifted from us. We can picture ourselves maintaining a serene detachment while confronted with crisis. We can picture a situation with a loved one in which we say what we need to say and feel good about staying true to ourselves. This is the way to use our minds to rehearse for future action.

Today I will hold an image of myself feeling relaxed and safe, even in the midst of confusion around me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Our own gentleness is a powerful force in our lives. It is like the gentle flower that grows through granite.

~ Patricia Hoolihan ~

We are attracted to women and men who have cultivated a gentle spirit. Their softness nurtures all of us who come into their space. We are soothed and made whole by their caring spirit. Let’s allow our caring spirit to develop too.

The aggression we may have grown accustomed to in our families and neighborhoods need not claim us for all time. We have the power within us to chart a new course. We have examples of gentleness all around us; they are our guides and are here by divine appointment.

Whatever task we are destined to perform in this clean and sober life can best be accomplished if directed by a heart that cares. Being gentle promises each of us the same comfort it offers others. Each gentle act heals our heart and lovingly nurtures the future.

Being gentle today is much easier than being mean-spirited. My gentle side will nurture my inner child and remove my fears.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am searching for strength and meaning

It is hard to face my uncertain future. With my dual disorder, especially the mood disorder, I now see that much in my life must change in order to get better. Sometimes I feel I have little to hold on to.

But no matter what else changes, I will always have the Twelve Step program. It does not predict the course of my recovery, but it offers me bedrock to stand on, a path to follow, and the understanding and strength of fellow travelers. It offers me meaning.

I will attend at least two Twelve Step meetings each week as part of my dual recovery plan.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I feel like I had a slip today, and I didn’t drink or use.

~ Beth T. ~

Aside from a “slip” to drinking or using, we may also have what we call a “behavior slip,” a return to an old pattern of unhealthy behavior toward ourselves or others. Behaviors such as lying to someone, losing our temper unnecessarily, or carelessly hurting another’s feelings are all too easy to fall into sometimes.

At least now, though, our minds are clear and we can realize it when it happens. We become aware of unhealthy behavior and, thanks to our recovery program, take action. We can make an immediate amend, and teach ourselves to avoid that behavior in the future.

These behavior slips are not the end of our recovery. They are signs that we are breaking away from old patterns, old ways of living. They are part of the process — painful when they happen, but resolvable. And they are happening less and less. We can forgive ourselves for these slips. When they happen, we can share the experience with our Higher Power, group or sponsor. They can help us heal the wound, make an amend, and let go again.

Today help me be aware of my behavior toward others and honestly make amends when I need to.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

If one is lucky, a solitary fantasy can totally transform one million realities.

~ Maya Angelou ~

Laura Hillenbrand tells about a time when she watched some laborers working on an electrical box. One of the men walked into her side yard, looked around, and then jumped onto a swing her father had hung from a tree. The man, she wrote, “swung peacefully with the biggest grin on his face. Then he jumped off and went back to work.” A well-ordered, predictable day-to-day existence can provide you with much-needed parameters for lessening the chaos you have felt in the past. But strict adherence to a well-ordered existence can leave little room for curiosity, wonder, play, and adventure, which can add lightness to your life.

When you were a child, daydreams provided release from boredom and predictability and gave you the opportunity to ponder “What if” questions. It did not matter where your daydreams took you or if they would come true. You still have the opportunity to daydream today— and even to make your daydreams come true. You can imagine riding a horse across a grassy field—and sign up for a riding lesson. You can imagine being a brave person— and then transfer that energy into your actions today.

Today I will let my daydreams come so I can see a world full of joy and possibilities.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.

~ Swedish proverb ~

Worry does absolutely nothing for our emotional, physical, or spiritual health. Worry makes us anxiety ridden people. Suddenly a small situation or a minor disagreement takes on the proportion of a giant, looming high above us and casting a long, dark shadow over our lives.

“How important is it?” is a good question to ask at times when we are worried. The second question to ask is, “What can I do about this worry right now?” lf we stay in the present, we’ll soon discover that much of our worry involves something in the past or something yet to happen. For as long as we focus on the object of our worry, we are not living in the here and now.

We have the power within us to make our worries gigantic. We also have the power to make our worries manageable. As we look back over today’s events, we don’t need to waste our present time worrying over things done or things left undone. Nor do we need to worry about things yet to come. We can choose instead to live for right now and leave our worries where they belong.

I will walk with my own shadow and not one cast by worry.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Doing the little things

Commonplace acts of kindness are a way to God even more than the grand and glorious acts. It is the everyday observance of what we know to be right that will lead us to our Higher Power. We must live up to what we know will sustain us in our drug-free lives.

With smiles, friendly words, and patience during trying times, we will slowly climb the steps of growth. It is harder to do the little things every day than to shine forth in a crisis, and nothing that we do or don’t do goes unnoticed by our Higher Power.

Do I tend to the little things every day?

Higher Power, help me find satisfaction in doing the simple, common tasks.

Two little things I will tend to today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Would you take a stick and punish your hand because it lacked understanding?

~ RABBI SHMELKE OF NIKOLSBURG ~

Newcomer

What is a “moral inventory,” exactly?

Sponsor

There are many approaches to Step Four in program literature and in publications about recovery; at Step meetings you’ll hear people describe still other methods suggested by their sponsors. All these methods involve writing—one of the most powerful tools we have in recovery.

Taking our moral inventory helps us get to know ourselves better by looking honestly at our behavior and its impact on ourselves and others. One simple, effective approach, as suggested in AA’s Big Book, focuses on two key emotions: fear and resentment. We make as complete as possible a list of people and institutions we have feared and resented. We identify what it is in us that feels threatened by each individual on our list. The result is a portrait—not of others, but of ourselves and the feelings that have fueled our addictive lives.

Another approach is to list our assets and deficits, as we might do for a business. A balanced picture includes pluses as well as minuses, so for those of us who are experts at self-dislike, it’s important to note not only our past mistakes, but also the progress we’ve made. How are we evolving into more honest, caring, responsible people? What are we doing better? What are our positive qualities, and how do they contribute to a strong recovery?

Today, I think about writing a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself. In the spirit of honesty, I will record assets as well as deficits.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It has always been a source of amusement to observe how belligerent people get in religious controversies and it is usually true that the less religion they practice the more they are prone to argue about it.

A convert is anyone who deserts some other form of religion and accepts yours or mine. Your convert may be my renegade.

Those who have the real spirit of the Golden Rule don’t have to fight over religion for they have it, they know they have it and they know no one can take it from them.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Heard it through the group-vine.

2) NA Nazis

3) Serenity is not the absence of disturbance, it is being okay with that disturbance.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Search For Serenity

The search is yours and mine. Each finds his way with help, but yet alone.

Serenity is the goal. It comes to those who learn to wait and grow; for each can learn to understand himself and say, “I’ve found a joy in being me, and knowing you; a knowledge of the depths I can descend, a chance to climb the heights above my head.”

The way is no so easy all the time. Our feet will stumble often as we go. A friend may need to give some extra help, as we once gave to others when in the hour of fear.

This is no picnic path that we have found; but yet compared to other days and other times, it seems a better route.

We lost our way before, in fear, guilt, and resentments held too long. Self-pity had its way with us; we found the perfect alibi for all our faults.

We do not know what life may bring from day to day. Tomorrow is a task not yet begun, and we could fail to pass its test.

But this will ait, while in today we do the best we can. Today we try to grow. Today we live, we seek to know, to give, to share, with you.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

SALT AND LIGHT

Read Matthew 5:13 – 16

In the fifth chapter of Matthew are recorded some of the most powerful pronouncements of Jesus.

Ye are the salt of the earth . . . Ye are the light of the world (Matthew 5:13 – 14).

It is possible, and in fact, only too easy, to accept these vital principles as being true; to love the beauty in them; and yet not to put them consistently into practice in one’s own life’ but this is a perilous attitude, for in that case the salt has lost its savor, and is good for nothing but to be cast out and trodden underfoot.

If you make every effort to practice the teachings of Jesus in every department of your own daily life; if you seek systematically to destroy in yourself selfishness, pride, vanity, sensuality, self-righteousness, jealousy, self-pity, resentment, condemnation, and so forth—not feeding or nourishing them by giving in to them; if you extend the right thought loyally to ever person within your ken, then you are worthy to be called the salt of the earth.

If you truly live this life, then not only will you make your own demonstration, in the quickest possible time, but you will be, in a very positive sense, a healing and illumining influence on all around you. You will be a blessing to men and women in remote places and times, men and women of whom you have never heard, and who will never hear of you—a light of the world.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Consciousness, Not Conditions

Consciously selected miracles can be misguided.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

One of the questions I am most frequently asked is, “How do I know if something I am praying for is in my best interests? What if I am imposing my will over God’s will? How can I tell if my request is being inspired by love or driven by my ego?”

A rule of thumb that I suggest is to assume that your inspirations are coming from right intuition, and act with authority. Once in a while you will find that you have made a mistake, but in the long run you will be way ahead of where you would be if you assume that your intuitions are guided by ego and do nothing.

The real answer to the question is to understand that what you are seeking is not really conditions, but consciousness. You may be praying for a new BMW, but what you really want is to know that you are an abundant being living in a wealthy universe. You may be seeking a soulmate, but behind your search is the quest to know that you are lovable and cherishable. You may want to have a number-one hit on the pop charts, but behind that desire is the wish to feel acknowledged and important. You can get the conditions, but if you do not have the consciousness, you will be ever seeking and striving for more conditions. If you have the consciousness, however, the conditions will usually manifest automatically, and even if they do not, you will be secure in your wholeness.

If you aren’t sure if what you are praying for is correct, complete your prayer with “this or better.” Tell God (remind yourself) that you are doing the best you can with what you know, and if there is something more wonderful available, you are willing to give up your current idea for the bigger picture.

Help me to know that my prayers are worthy. Show me that I am Your child, deserving of your kingdom.

God’s will for me is perfect happiness.

[majestyjo]

April 19

Step by Step

Today, feel gratitude that we have been given the gift to feel other than a hangover, the loss of focus and concentration, the fear of what we said and did last night but can’t remember, fear of promises we cannot keep. All else, feel the good and bad, grateful for the good and remorse and regret for the bad. And if we feel the need to cry, cry with the good and the bad, but will hold onto the good and use it as a stepping stone to tomorrow and ask the higher power to take from us the bad because we cannot hold onto it any longer. If we feel angry, feel it – then let go and let God. If we feel a resentment, we must not allow it to infect our today and threaten tomorrow. Instead, be grateful that we now have the choice to ask God to take from us else that we should not hold onto. With all that we feel, the good will outweigh the bad and, because it does, we have no reason to drink, no reason to use. Live and do not wallow in today. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

H.A.L.T.

H.A.L.T. = Don’t get too hungry, or too angry, or too lonely, or too tired.

~ Anonymous ~

The Fellowship has seen many men and women recover from very low and terrible bottoms. When the Steps are carefully worked, miracles can be expected. The lessons aren’t hard to understand. The signposts to a relapse are well marked. We can learn a lot from people who have fallen away from the Program.

Don’t get too hungry. When we are weak physically, it affects our spiritual life. When hungry, eat. We need to stay away from anger altogether. Anger is the breeder of resentments. We have been eaten alive by our grudges. Cool off. Loneliness makes us an easy mark for the many voices that tempt us away from the Program. When we feel loneliness coming on, we go to a meeting or use the phone. When we become tired, it is easy for us to remember the chemical pick-me-ups we relied on. When we’re tired, we need to rest.

Let me remember to eat the right foods, stay calm, use the Fellowship, and rest.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

When one door closes another door opens; hut we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which open for us.

~ Alexander Graham Bell ~

Change is a basic fact of life and with every change comes a loss. Even winning the lottery entails the loss of our life before the big win. During some periods of our life, we feel we are stuck and nothing changes, or we feel trapped in a situation we would love to change. Other times a change occurs that we would never choose, and we have to find a way to continue living with the new reality.

Coping with the closing and opening of doors is a fundamental spiritual matter. We are pilgrims on a Journey and much of what happens along our way is beyond our control. Today will bring some things that we did not expect and with the changes will be new possibilities that we did not expect. So we hold the spiritual attitude that while we cannot control what happens, we can choose how we will respond.

Today I pray for the spiritual vision to see the doors that open for me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I’m not very different from others. We all have dark days of fear and doubt, but it’s okay.

~ JoAnn Reed ~

The beauty of living a Twelve Step program is that we don’t have to dwell in the darkness ever again. We can be free of doubt over the smallest or gravest situations if we make the decision to turn our lives and will over to the care of a loving Higher Power. To receive this gift, all we need to do is ask for the help our Higher Power has promised.

We begin to feel grateful when we develop trust in the promises of this program. We knew fear and heartache all too well. Feeling, maybe for the first lime, real joy and freedom from incessant worry is no exhilarating, energizing, gratifying.

We are given only the knowledge and information we need for these twenty-four hours. But we can feel certain that the day will unfold according to the plan of our Higher Power. We have nothing to fear. This day will not be dark if we walk with our friends in this program and let God lead the way.

My day will be dark only if I shut out the light of my Higher Power. Through my faith and my friends I can know peace.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I don’t want to hurt myself anymore

I used to have painful episodes in which I would end up physically hurting myself. External events and internal thoughts would generate extreme distress, even rage. The only relief I could think of (surprising as it seems to me now) was to hurt myself. Somehow at the time, it helped.

These days, I am learning other ways to release my pain, to channel my rage. For one, I’m talking about my feelings with helpful people. For another, I’m hitting tennis balls (instead of myself). Now when I feel that intensity rise, I am less afraid and less at risk. I have choices.

If I ever feel self-destructive, I will practice one of the techniques I’ve learned to relieve the pain and soothe myself.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Shame is the core problem of our time.

~ John Bradshaw ~

Guilt can help us. Shame can destroy us. If we feel guilty for stealing, the guilt is speaking to us about our behavior — stealing. But if we feel ashamed of ourselves, the shame speaks to us about me, the whole person. The more shame we feel, the more we feel we don’t deserve quality relationships, jobs, or sobriety. And we’ll probably undermine them all, usually without knowing it. Then we feel even more ashamed, and repeat the cycle.

Recognizing shame when we feel it can help us halt its destructive course. Sharing our feelings with a sponsor or friend can help us feel better. Thinking about when we felt ashamed in the past will help us identify patterns that we repeat because of shame. Shame thrives on secrets. Now we learn to talk about our feelings openly, and we learn we’re worth loving.

Today I will know in my heart that I’m not a shameful person. I am worthy of recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

He has not learned the lesson of life who does not every day surmount a fear.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

In his book Stairway to Success, Nido R. Qubein reports that a naval aviator once told him that many pilots die because they choose to stay with a disabled aircraft. He writes, “They preferred the familiarity of the thingypit to the unfamiliarity of the parachute, even though the thingypit was a deathtrap.”

Whenever you choose to remain with what is familiar, what you have previously tried, or what you already know does not work, you will continue to experience the same outcomes. After all, when you keep doing the things that have never worked with the expectation that things will turn out differently, you are setting yourself up for certain defeat.

Like the pilots, you may feel much safer staying in a familiar environment than by taking the leap and venturing out into the unfamiliar. But if you have not tried something before, how do you know it will fail? It is only when you leave what is familiar and try something you have never tried before that you have the greatest possibility for success. There will be times in your recovery when you simply must face your fears and take the leap.

Today I can feel fearful before I try something new, but I will try it anyway.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Cast thy bread upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after many days

~ Ecclesiastes 11:1 ~

There are many conveniences in our lives today. Central heating, instamatic cameras, twenty-four-hour bank tellers, microwave ovens, and shop-by-mail catalogs are just a few of the creations that allow us more time to relax or do what we need to do.

But there are inconveniences, too, that require attention at awkward times. Inconveniences like bank machines that don’t work, or hair dryers that break, or airline flights that are delayed. Do we also see people as inconveniences? Perhaps our children need us at inopportune moments or fiamily get-togethers fall during stressful times. If we view such times as impositions, then no time will ever be convenient.

Yet the door we slam may well be the door that is slammed in our face when we are in need. Are we so important that we can’t devote a few minutes, a couple of hours, or an evening to someone who needs our attention, comfort, guidance, or companionship? The more we give, the more we shall receive.

Have I viewed people in my life as intruders? Can I learn to give a little to others?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Using today’s tools

Are we becoming stuck in the “if onlys”? “If only I had more money.” “If only I were more attractive.” “If only my parents had listened to Dr. Spock.” The “if onlys” will get us nowhere. We would do better to think about what we have to work with today.

Do we remember that we are fortunate just to be alive? Are we grateful that, one day at a time, we are clean and sober? Do we keep in mind that we have at our disposal the Twelve Step program and all its tools? When we dwell in the “if onlys,” we get stuck in yesterday. But what we have to work with today are “today’s tools,” and if we use them well, we’ll have no need for the “if onlys.”

Am I using the tools I have today?

God, help me to recognize today’s tools and to become willing to use them.

The tools I will use today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

You can look at the past—but don’t stare.

~ FRANCIS BRADY ~

Newcomer

From what I hear, many people don’t write a Fourth Step inventory until a year or two after entering recovery. Some wait three, even four years. I’ve heard the expression “A Step a year.” Should I wait?

Sponsor

In the early days of AA, newcomers were guided through the Steps within a few days or weeks of getting sober. Many people were helped to a new, sober life that way. Over time, n more gradual approach has proved just as effective for newcomers in AA and other Twelve Step programs.

Today, those who are committed to staying in recovery have a great deal of fellowship support available. We have a proliferation of programs, many models of long-term experience in recovery, and large numbers of meetings to choose from. With all this support, some may choose to postpone Steps Four through Twelve, yet still manage to stay sober— though “a Step a year,” if taken literally, could be a prescription for endlessly postponing the joy of recovery. Honest self-examination is a necessary part of the process that leads to the waking up of our spirits. Why delay it?

For us, gentleness is essential in doing the Fourth Step. Our purpose is not self-punishment or humiliation. It’s letting go of the guilt and shame that led us to numb ourselves with addictive substances and behaviors. We can begin by keeping a Fourth Step file or index cards on which we list fears and resentments one or two at a time, as we remember them. Or we can use a gentle Step Four workbook. Because we trust that a Higher Power is part of our process, we don’t have to put off Step Four or hurry through it.

Today, I look at my past with honesty and compassion.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

All things in life are relative. Without night there would be no day; without evil there would be no good; without sorrow there would be no joy.

Drunk or sober, clouds will occasionally appear on the horizon but most of them will blow away. Storm will sometimes break upon us but if we are prepared we can ride it out and the rainbow will follow giving promise of better things ahead.

Yesterday’s rain enhances our pleasure in today’s sunshine.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Not asking for support is a sign of weakness.

2) HOW: Hang Onto Winners

3) Being an alcoholic does not give you the excuse to act alcoholically.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow

There are two days I every week about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

One of these days is YESTERDAY with its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains. YESTERDAY has passed forever beyond our control.

All of the money in the world cannot bring back YESTERDAY. We cannot undo a single act we performed; we cannot erase a single word we said. YESTERDAY is gone.

The other day we should not worry about is TOMORROW with its possible adversaries, its burdens, its large and poor performance. TOMORROW is also beyond our immediate control.

TOMORROW’s sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds—but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in TOMORROW, for it is as yet unborn.

This leaves only one day . . . TODAY. Any person can fight the battle of just one day It is only when you and I add the YESTERDAY and TOMORROW that we break down.

It is not the experience of TODAY that drives people mad—it is remorse or bitterness for something which happened YESTERDAY and the dread of what TOMORROW may bring.

LET US, THEREFORE, LIVE BUT ONE DAY AT A TIME!

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven (Matthew 5:16)

The state of your soul is always expressed in your outer conditions and in the intangible influence that you radiate at large. There is a cosmic law that nothing can permanently deny its own nature. Emerson said: “What you are shouts so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.” The soul that is built upon prayer cannot be hidden, it shines out brightly through the life that it lives. It speaks for itself, but in utter silence, and does much of its best work unconsciously. Its mere presence heals and blesses all around it.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Guilt and Responsibility

Love and guilt cannot co-exist, and to accept one is to deny the other.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

While addressing a support group for cancer patients, I explained that we shape our lives by the thoughts and attitudes we hold. Illness is the universe’s way of getting our attention so we can realign our life with the perfect pattern we deserve. Because our thoughts and energies have a role in manifesting disease, we can facilitate healing by shifting our vision toward wholeness.

After the lecture, the sponsor angrily told me, “I didn’t like you making my people feel guilty for their cancers; they feel guilty enough as it is!” I was stunned. I had not said anything about guilt. To the contrary, my intention was to empower the patients to know that they were worthy of being healed and to open up to the possibility that they could take an active role in their healing.

The ego, which thrives on guilt, does not understand responsibility, for the separated mind cannot conceive of being at cause. Its very existence is built on the illusion of being an effect. The notion of creatorship threatens the ego’s platform of victimhood. Someone who feels guilty will fight the notion of responsibility, as the ego cannot see beyond the blame game. In the game of creative living, however, each of us has the power to manifest the world we choose, regardless of the worlds that others are choosing for themselves or would choose for us.

Guilt is debilitating, while responsibility is liberating. Guilt focuses on what you did in the past, while responsibility looks at how the choices you make now will affect your future. Guilt is shrouded with blame; responsibility empowers us toward greater possibilities. Guilt is emotional and implies sin; responsibility is reasonable and points toward laws of success. Guilt calls for punishment; responsibility calls only for correction.

We are all responsible. Let us reclaim our power to be healthy and live the lives we choose.

Help me release guilt forever and walk in the power with which You created me.

The power of life is in my hands. I choose to love and be whole.

[majestyjo]

April 20

Step by Step

Today, small steps instead of an “easier, softer way” – giant leaps toward the goal of recovery. Alcoholism and its companion physical, emotional and spiritual diseases developed over time, and their solution is likely to take as much if not more time. But impatience is a characteristic of most alcoholics, and it cannot be allowed to tempt us to take the short route through the steps toward sobriety. Failing to give full and complete attention to each step may set us up for frustration and disappointment – and together they put us at risk for a slip or relapse. Today, wisdom of patience in taking the steps one by one and understanding that it is through working them that we earn what we pursue. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SINCERITY

The more we love our friends, the less we flatter them; it is by excusing nothing that pure love shows itself.

~ Moliere ~

The concern we display for those new to our Program must always be sincere and honest. When beginners ask for advice, our answer mustn’t be phony, but we also need to soften the blow by “truth with love.” We can do this by promising them that life will get better if they really want spiritual growth and if they are freely willing to change their attitudes.

If we “con” anyone with false promises because we don’t want to hurt their feelings, they will become our enemy when they find out the truth. This will surely happen when their recovery becomes secure.

If someone in the Fellowship makes me angry by telling a truth that brings me progress, let me be sincere enough to tell them I am grateful.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

My dear child, you must believe in God in spite of what the clergy tell you.

~ Benjamin Jowett ~

We come to the Twelve Step program of recovery from many different backgrounds. Some of us already have a very solid spiritual base to call upon. Some of us have a blank, undeveloped sense of spirituality and an open mind. Some of us had negative or even abusive experiences with organized religion, so we turned away from all ideas of spirituality. Now we are following a path that asks us to turn our lives and will over to God, and our past experience may tell us to say no to such a proposition.

Still, we want to recover, and our previous methods didn’t work, so now we are willing to have an open mind about “the God thing.” Maybe we can learn something we never understood before. The concept of God was controversial even among the men who first developed this path. They all knew that spiritual reliance was crucial to recovery, but they didn’t all believe in God in the same way. So they landed on the phrase, “God as we understood Him.” Wisely, they made the program’s spirituality a very big tent, and there is room for every individual’s beliefs.

Today I am grateful for the spirituality that this program has nurtured within me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Now that I don’t have to drink anymore, I’m glad I’m an alcoholic.

~ Anne A. ~

Remember how we felt when we first heard someone say at a meeting that she was grateful to be an alcoholic or drug addict? We were astonished. We weren’t grateful! How much our attitudes have changed. Now we, too, acknowledge the grace that has accompanied our addiction to chemicals. And most days we are grateful.

We couldn’t have imagined the lives we are now leading. Without a doubt we craved more joy and security, fewer conflicts, a sense of belonging. But we never imagined that giving up mood-altering chemicals was the solution. We thought they gave us the only happiness we deserved.

Now we are experiencing real happiness because of our sobriety. We are willing to let a Higher Power help us, and we are sincere in our efforts to change negative behaviors and attitudes. Everything we need is now ours.

Happiness is mine today. It’s as close as the expression of my gratitude.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to have faith

At my Step meeting, I hear the word faith. I hear that it’s important to my recovery. It’s a small word, but I don’t think I understand it. And I don’t think I have much of it.

And yet, as a child, I remember my uncle would hold my hands and wrists tight and swing me around and around and around. It scared me, but I loved it. I giggled. I got dizzy. I squealed in delight. Then, smiling, he would slow the spinning and slowly let me down. I trusted him and he never dropped me. Is that what faith is about?

I will ask two of my friends at group to talk with me about who they trust and what they believe in.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

In a consumer society, there are inevitably two kinds of slaves: the prisoners of addiction and the prisoners of envy.

~ Ivan Illich ~

Envy comes from a belief that others have more, or are worth more, than us. Coming to believe we are lovable lets us trust the healing of our addictions. This process challenges us to take off our masks and get to know our real selves. When we finally have the courage to confront our internal secrets, obsessions, and fears, we are set free. The deep, empty hole in us that cried out for soothing begins to heal, and we feel settled.

The task of accepting our human weaknesses and limitations and loving ourselves in spite of our imperfections is a difficult one, but is the path of spiritual growth.

Being willing to nourish the healthy seed inside us is one of the first steps that is necessary for the door of recovery to swing open. As we let go of our pain, self-doubt begins to diminish and our real selves begin to flourish.

Today let me trust that there is something lovable and healthy inside me that is waiting to flourish.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Peace is when time doesn’t matter as it passes by.

~ Maria Schell ~

Prayer and meditation are used together so often that you may think they are essentially the same thing. But prayer is more of a direct outreach and communication with a divine being, while meditation encourages you to “go within” to create stillness and serenity.

There is no right or wrong way to meditate. Those who exercise—especially long distance runners—often think of their workout as a form of meditation. Others make a ritual out of their meditation by setting aside the same time each day, listening to soothing music, or chanting. Some use deep breathing techniques or yoga poses. Others listen to guided meditation tapes or meditate regularly with others.

But no matter what form your meditation takes, the purpose is to allow time for relaxation and for letting go so you can let your thoughts and emotions run free. You feel and observe what is within you and, in so doing, learn more about your innermost thoughts and feelings. When you do, you can better understand your fears, doubts, insecurities, regrets, and resentments. With this understanding, you can use the tools of the program to decrease the hold these emotions have upon you.

Meditation gives me the chance to learn more about myself. Today I will still my mind to open my mind.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I know that I am here in a world where nothing is permanent but change. . . . I can change the form of things and influence a few people and that I am influenced by these and other people.

~ Elbert Hubbard ~

We are related to every person we see in a day, from the bus driver to the family member, from the store clerk to the boss, from strangers on the sidewalk to our dear friends. We are constantly changing, in constant motion with the people, places, and things around us. We are connected like links in a chain. Each link supports and gets support from those around it.

This connectedness is especially evident at meetings when we hear others tell our stories or relate to our feelings. Yet this same connectedness can be felt outside of a meeting with both program and nonprogram people. If there are addicted people in our lives, we can feel a connection with them because o[ their disease. We can understand them better and see ourselves more clearly through their defects. We are part of a strong chain made even stronger because of our differences.

There are those who know how we feel and can relate to us. I can learn to feel a part of everything.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being willing

People often ask, “How does the program work?” The HOW of this program is Honesty, Open-mindedness, and Willingness. Often we must pray for willingness; sometimes we even have to pray to be willing to be willing!

We have very stubborn wills. If surrendered daily, however, they can accomplish much good for ourselves and others. Surely those who say “I will, I will” and don’t are not as close to the heart of God as those who say “I will not,” but do!

Am I really willing?

God, help me realize that to do your will for me today, in however small a way, I must let go of my own will.

I will practice willingness today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.

~ VIRGINIA WOOLF ~

Newcomer

Why should I have to take the blame for everything? What about the things other people have done to me?

Sponsor

Taking Step Four isn’t about blaming ourselves or others. It can help us with our anger at those we believe have harmed us. When we write a Fourth Step, we name all the people and institutions we fear and resent. By putting into writing the wrongs we believe each of them has committed, we see the array of fears and resentments that burden our minds and disturb our serenity.

It’s human nature to fear or resent people we haven’t treated well. If I neglect someone—he to her, cheat her, or take something away from her that I know deep down is rightfully hers—I don’t very much want to see or think about her. I tell myself, “It’s all her fault.” Guilt feels unpleasant; I may turn to my addiction to keep it at bay. Step Four asks me to take an honest look at the ways I myself contributed to or even caused the situation I’m so upset about.

But there may also be certain things we didn’t cause. What if we’re convinced that we’re right? Instead of plotting revenge, we can understand that there are others who are mentally or spiritually ill. We can acknowledge what they have done, without having to cling to resentment. We can ask in our prayers that they be healed.

Today, I let faith replace my fears and resentments.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Your Area Headquarters can probably use some additional help on the desk or perhaps a receptionist to interview new people calling at the club for help. They probably have a pressing need for Twelve Steppers or people who have a car and are available a day a week. Maybe they could use some speakers or even chair setter-uppers.

How about your Group? It takes people to distribute and collect ash trays. It’s possible you might come in handy preparing or distributing refreshments.

Whatever your talents are it is a safe bet they can use you. Then the Group will become Your Group. Don’t wait to be drafted – Volunteer.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Here is a thought that kills a lot of chemical dependents: That may be true for you, but I’m different.

2) If you are looking for the perfect group before you join a home group, you are going to be homeless.

3) NA: We are not reformed junkies-but informed addicts.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Just For Today

Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appal me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln sait, that “Most folks are as happy as they make their minds to be.”

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study; I will learn something useful; I will not be a mental loafer; I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don’t want to do—just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as good as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticize not one bit, not find fault with anything, and not try to improve or regulate anybody except myself.

Just for today I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself, and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. I will enjoy that which is beautiful, and will believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CITY OF LIGHT

And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me (John 12:32)

Never try to force other people to accept spiritual truth. Instead, see to it that they are so favourably impressed by your own life and conduct, and by the peace and joy that radiate from you, that they will come running to you of their own accord, begging you to give them the wonderful thing that you have. To do this is to make your soul truly the city upon a hill that cannot be hidden because it is the City of God. This is to let your light shine to the glorifying of your Father which is in Heaven.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Don’t Hiss It

What is essential is invisible to the eye; only with the heart can one see rightly.

~ from The Little Prince, by Saint-Exupery ~

As he stood before a firing squad, French dissident le Bodoyere gently touched his hand to his heart and advised the soldiers, “This is what you must not miss.”

We would do well to remember le Bodoyere’s advice throughout our entire lives. We may have all manner of material success, but unless our heart is fulfilled, we have nothing.

When someone died in ancient Egypt, the priests removed the bodily organs they considered unimportant and saved the organs they believed sacred. The Egyptians discarded the brains but kept the heart. They believed that the seat of true wisdom was not the mind, but the heart.

The power of the heart goes far beyond feeling and emotions; in the heart lies great wisdom and peace. In our culture, we tend to try to think things through. Certainly the rational process is important, but it must be tempered with intuitive understanding. In my seminars, I tell audiences, “Please point to yourself.” Nearly every person in the room points to their heart. Although they had a choice of many body parts, 99 percent of those asked sensed that they live in their heart. On some level, we remember that our heart contains the essence of who we are.

Practice consulting your heart before speaking or acting. If you are not sure what to say or do, take a moment, draw a few deep breaths, and feel what is happening in your chest. There you will find the most valuable guide to right action. If you find yourself upset or unhappy, ask your heart, “What would you have me know?” Employ all the worldly wisdom available, but when you want to know the most important truth, return to your heart. “This is what you must not miss.”

I pray to know the wisdom of my heart and act upon its sacred knowledge.

My heart guides me to right action.

[majestyjo]

April 21

Step by Step

Today, I am okay! I will not let the clutter of my alcoholic past, its regrets and uncertainty about my future clutter my mind with preoccupation and neglect of today. If I cannot simply be and feel okay today, I have a weak foundation for any tomorrows. But I will not let worry about tomorrow impair me today. If today I do not drink, then I am more alive than I ever was when I was drinking. If I can make and keep today okay, then I am making some progress. Hopefully today’s progress will stretch into another 24 Hours and being okay will turn into something better. Today, I am okay. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EARNING REWARDS

I got a religion that wants to take heaven out of the clouds and plant it right here on earth where most of us can get a slice of it.

~ Irwin Shaw ~

We learn that there are no free trips to abstinence. There aren’t any “rain checks” we can take that will give us a head start back to abstinence if we slip. We can’t argue that bad luck or betrayal by others were responsible for the relapse.

We won’t ever be promised that we will have overnight comfort or success. Our success in the Program is decided by how hard we work it. We will get from the Steps only as much as we give it. Our investment in serenity and security will earn simple, real interest. There aren’t any easy contests to win.

The rewards I receive from the Program will be equal to the effort I put into my recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Love at first sight is easy to understand. It’s when two people have been looking at each other for years that it becomes a miracle.

~ Sam Levenson ~

True intimacy introduces us to ourselves. A loving relationship is the greatest therapy. When we first fall in love, we are filled with optimism and the greatest hopes for fulfillment of our dreams. We cling to all the best qualities of the person we fall in love with and we look past those things we don’t like. But living in an intimate partnership takes us beyond the edge of what we have learned. It is truly an adult developmental challenge.

Most of us fall in love and soon find ourselves in over our heads. We haven’t had experience as adults in sustaining the openness and vulnerability we have walked into. We may gradually begin to feel too vulnerable and exposed. The relationship tests our ability to trust someone who has this much access to our inner self. We are tempted to become cranky, edgy, or overly sensitive. We may test our partner’s love by asking, if you love me, will you do such and such? We begin to try to control our partner so we don’t feel so vulnerable. All these temptations are holdover behaviors from our less mature selves. So we must reach for our more mature selves, breathe deeply, and trust that we can survive while being so close and vulnerable.

Today I will turn to my Higher Power for guidance in going forward in trust while being vulnerable.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We grow in darkness and in light.

~ Marilyn Mason ~

Every experience is a learning opportunity. The abuse we suffered, whether physical or emotional, taught us survival and resilience. Even though we felt defeated, we are here now, and we’ve learned to recognize relationships that aren’t good for us. That’s evidence of growth.

Sponsors tell us we are always growing. Even when it feels like we are going backward, we are growing. Recognizing our slower pace signals our awareness, and that is growth too.

Gone are the days when we doubted our ability to grow, to change. One of the first lessons we learn In recovery is that change is possible. Every meeting surrounds us with examples. And much of the growth has come through the dark periods of our lives. The darkness and the light have much to teach us. Every moment is to be revered for its message.

I am ready to grow today. Regardless of the kind of experience I’m having, I’ll realize its worth to me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to relax more with people

In treatment it was painful to sit in a circle at group at first. Everybody could see me. I couldn’t hide or get away. Sometimes I even had to talk. I was afraid people wouldn’t like me or understand me (and then would look at me funny).

But after being with the group for several sessions, I was able to glance up at my fellow members when I was talking. Guess what? Nobody was looking at me funny at all. I think most were looking within themselves. After that, group got easier for me. Being able to talk in group has helped a lot.

Today I’ll practice looking at the person I am talking to (knowing I can look away at any time and feel safer).

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of.

~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson ~

When we talk with our Higher Power, we admit to ourselves that we need help from a Power greater than ourselves. When we remind ourselves every moment of the day that we cannot live without our Higher Power sustaining us, we will seek an even closer relationship with God in order to grow and maintain our sobriety.

When we meditate on the word “power” we bring a new strength, new energy, and new dedication to our lives. We can draw on this power any time we choose. And we can use our new power through prayer.

When we pray, seeking God’s guidance every day, we learn to trust and depend on our Higher Power to help us through each day’s challenges. We are no longer alone.

Today let me surrender my life to my Higher Power and be grateful for his presence in my life.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The present is the point of power.

~ Kate Green ~

Think of a recovery challenge you know you need to work on. If you look back to the past, you may consider that what you are currently facing is the same thing you have faced before and were unable to handle it. So you may use that as an excuse to avoid taking action now. If you look ahead to the future, you may consider putting off what you need to do today. Both approaches end up with the same result: you will not be able to handle what you are facing in the present. Do this for all the things on which you need to work, and you end up with an enormous accumulation of things you must eventually handle.

Living in the present moment means looking at what needs to be done in the present and taking care of those things. Taking action when action is needed provides you with more time, because as you take care of what you need to do today, you will have more time to handle the tasks of tomorrow. What have you been putting off in your recovery?

I will not let the things I need to do pile up. Today I will take care of something that needs my time and attention.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Prayer is one of life’s most puzzling mysteries. I have sometimes feared it is presumptuous to take up God’s time with my problems.

~ Celestine Sibley ~

For too long, we may have believed there was no God. Or we may have believed there was an omniscient being who was highly judgmental, ready to bless us when we did good things but ready to curse us when we made mistakes. Our sense of spirituality may have been buried deep beneath layers of fear or lack of trust.

The program teaches us there is a Higher Power who’s there to listen to our prayers and meditations. But how do we learn to pray? What do we ask for? What do we say? Do we get down on our knees, bow our heads, or lift our faces to the heavens?

We need to remember that our Higher Power hears us, no matter how we choose to pray. Whether we spend several minutes talking aloud about our day or a few moments sitting still and clearing our minds of all thoughts, our Higher Power cares for us. What’s important is making the effort to pray.

Higher Power, help me to remember there is no mystery to prayer.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Reflecting kindness and love

We alcoholics and addicts can be sensitive to the remarks of loved ones and friends—at times they seem unkind to us. Yet if we ex-amine ourselves, we may see that we are the ones who are out of tune. Perhaps we have turned away from our Higher Power and stopped working our program.

It is important to realize that what we see in others often reflects what is within our-selves. If I am afraid, I will see fear in others. If I feel anxious, I will see anxiety in others. When we come to understand that turning back to our Higher Power and our program means getting back in tune, then we’ll be much less sensitive and our reflection will be soft and loving.

What does my reflection look like?

Lord, help me to take personal inventory and stay close to the program.

Today I will reflect kindness and love by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.

~ PATRICIA BROOKS ~

Newcomer

I’d like to go back to the old days, just for a little while. It’s so hard being sober every day, and in every situation. There were many things that using made easier.

Sponsor

Sometimes we look back on our days of active addiction with fondness. We miss the experiences that became available to us when we acted out. Depending on our history and drug of choice, we may remember times when we moved easily in social situations, talked or danced with greater ease, even entered relationships without a lot of fuss and agony. Or maybe we had a greater sense of power in work situations: we remember a time when we worked around the clock without feeling tired, triumphantly meeting a deadline. We may simply miss the drug itself, its familiar physical sensations or psychological effects.

It’s better to acknowledge this sense of loss than to ignore it. If we’re willing to go back, imaginatively, to what we think of as our days of freedom, then we can also remember what followed. Feelings of pleasure, expansiveness, or power eventually led to the very states we were attempting to anesthetize: exhaustion, dependency, self-dislike.

Today, I see the history of my addiction with clarity.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The churches in their quarrels over purely sectarian issues have done much to divert attention from the primary purpose of religion, which is spirituality.

Some pastors take a more critical attitude toward the neglect of church duties than they do toward moral transgressions.

AA should be kept free of all controversial questions. We have but one purpose and that is to help the suffering alcoholic. Ours is a way of life; not a way of worship.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) SERENITY NOW

2) Not being able to ask for help is a real sign of weakness.

3) HOW: Honest Open Willing

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along a beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to him, and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it. “Lord, You said that once I decided to follow You, You’d walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why when I needed You most, You would leave me.”

The Lord replied, “My precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

EXCEEDING RIGHTEOUSNESS

Read Matthew 5:17-20

If anyone were so insane as to suppose that the knowledge of the Truth of Being could put him “above” the moral law, in the sense of authorizing him to break it, he would speedily discover that he had made a tragic mistake. The more spiritual knowledge that one possesses, the more severe is the punishment which one brings upon oneself by any infraction of the moral law. The Christian has to be very much more careful than other people. Indeed, all real spiritual understanding must necessarily be accompanied by definite moral improvement. A theoretical acceptance of the letter of Truth might go with moral carelessness (greatly to the peril of the delinquent), but it is impossible to make any real spiritual progress unless you are trying your very best to live the life. It is impossible to divorce true spiritual knowledge from right conduct.

For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 5:20)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Beyond Duty

There are three impediments to enlightenment: Lust, fear, and duty.

~ Buddha ~

Jesus told the parable of a wealthy man who went through a town inviting the important people to a great feast. “Sorry, I have to work,” said one man.

“I’m on my way to bury a relative,” answered another. Everyone he asked could not come because they had something to do first. Finally, the man invited all the poor people in town, and they accepted because they had nothing else more pressing. Jesus likened the banquet to the kingdom of heaven, which we miss if we are caught up in worldly activities. Time and again Jesus affirmed that the kingdom of heaven is at hand, and we may enter it if we are open to receiving it.

The kingdom of heaven is just as available today as it was when Jesus pointed toward it. Since that time, we have invented even more duties that we believe we must perform before we can have peace. Begin to examine your sense of duty, and ask yourself where it comes from. Do you respond to the needs and wishes of others because you will feel guilty if you do not? Do you believe that you must play out the roles others tell you that you should fulfill to be a good daughter, son, wife, husband, employer, student, or disciple? Do you postpone joy because you believe you must first strive, suffer, or pay off karma?

Activities are valuable only if they bring us closer to peace. Relationships are healthy only as much as they reflect real love. Careers are important only for the aliveness they bring us and the service they render to others. To follow any creed that does not proceed from your heart is hypocrisy and psychic self-abuse. Begin to sincerely question your motives for social activities, and let go of anything that does not reflect a truth you believe from the inside out. Your life is too important to live for others. Come to the banquet now.

Bless me with the strength to live my spiritual truth and ideals.

I walk the path I believe in and let all else go.

[majestyjo]

April 22

Step by Step

Today, stop running from regret, shame, guilt, loss and all other anguish that my drinking days evoked. I must come to terms and reconciliation with all of it. By taking each step with absolute honesty and the will of my higher power, I will look instead to the lessons to be learned from my actions that eventually pooled together to create the pain I may still carry. Regret and shame might be eased by the single strongest amend I can make: by not drinking today. I can release guilt by learning from the mistakes that bred it, and the sense of loss might be less if I can be grateful that I even had what I lost and accept that I might not have been ready to be responsible for what I had – and lost. Today, I work on weakening any pain not by confronting it but finding the comfort in it. But, in the end, if I deny or do not allow myself to feel and deal with the hurt, the good might not feel as good as it might otherwise. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

AVOIDING GOSSIP

Tale-bearers are as bad as the tale-makers.

~ Richard Sheridan ~

What we talk about, not whom we talk about, is one way we place principle above personalities and practice our 12th Tradition. At meetings and over coffee, it’s tempting to pass along things we hear about other people who share our recovery.

Before we gossip or find fault with others, wise members teach us to ask ourselves three questions: “Is it true?” “Is it kind?” and “is telling it important to help someone’s recovery?” If we can say “yes” to each question, we mustn’t repeat it. If a single word from us hurts someone else, our guilt could throw us back into addiction. Our gossip could cause someone else to lose faith in the Program, and throw them back into addiction.

I will not gossip. Let me talk about principles, not personalities.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

I go to nature to be soothed and healed, and to have my senses put in order.

~ John Burroughs ~

In the Twelve Steps we see the term God several times. But from the program’s beginning, there have been atheists and agnostics using and valuing the Steps as their guide for life. Many men do not relate to a personal God. They do, however, experience the meaning and spirit of their group and the restoring powers of nature. That is why the founders of Alcoholics Anonymous included the phrase “God as we understood Him.”

Whether a personal God is real to us or not, nature is there for us as a healing and refreshing source. We don’t have to go on a major trip to the mountains or fishing in the wilderness to find this source. We find it in the sky, the clouds, and the magical moon; we find it in the intricate structure of a leaf, a massive tree in the park, or a wild bird visiting a feeder. There is no more clear evidence of the generous gifts that come unbidden than in nature. And we can rest in the Power greater than ourselves shown in creation and the forces of nature.

Today I will be soothed and healed by nature all around.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

In celebrating the good in me that was always there, I will continue to flourish.

~ Jill Clark ~

Dreading a Fourth Step is not unusual. We expect to confront nothing but numerous defects. However, we will also discover our assets. Our sponsors suggest that we need to acknowledge the good in ourselves to enhance it. Doing a Fourth Step inventory as part of our recovery will keep our assets fresh in mind.

If we put our mind to it, it’s not difficult to choose one asset each day and focus on it during our encounters with other people. Practice is how we get good at anything. It’s certainly no different when we focus on human behavior.

Maybe it seems phony to work at enhancing the good in ourselves. But let’s accept the wisdom of our sponsors. Their lives have improved. If practice has worked for them, it can work for us too.

Improving a small part of me at a time isn’t too much work. Cultivating I disagreeets in this way promises that today will be good.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am grateful for the telephone

I don’t know where my recovery would be without the phone. In just a few seconds I can get support from a sponsor, friend, or counsellor. I don’t have to feel isolated when I am near a phone. It is comforting and reassuring, especially when I’m having symptoms.

Although it’s not a face-to-face meeting (or a fellowship meeting), it is a powerful substitute that allows me to have a heart-to-heart talk with a caring person. It works well for me (especially when I’m too sick to get out). I am grateful that is available almost anywhere.

I will meditate today on my network of friends and on how (and when) I connect with them.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

He got the better of himself, and that’s the best kind of victory one can wish for.

~ Miguel de Cervantes ~

During active addiction, we were truly our own worst enemies. No one could have harmed us as much as we harmed ourselves. We were on a collision course with death, self-destructive and sometimes suicidal. It seemed we’d never get the better of ourselves. For most of us, the pain finally proved to be too much, and we began the first steps of change.

At first, we desperately held on to any anchor we could find, one day at a time, praying for the help we needed. Gradually, though, we found we could master our self-destructive urges. We began to choose people, places, and things more carefully. We began to appreciate the world around us in a new way. We learned a new respect for our body, mind, and spirit. We learned we very much wanted to stay here and be a healthy, happy part of the world.

We learned our weaknesses and strengths, and how to be gentle with our fragile selves. Now with the help of our Higher Power and our Twelve Step programs, we grow more confident and self-loving every day.

Today help me continue to grow in confidence and love.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Our feelings are our most genuine paths to knowledge.

~ Audre Lorde ~

There may be times when your emotions overwhelm you. You may wish you simply could not feel. But what would that mean—to live without any feeling? You would not feel sadness or happiness. You would not feel tired, and you would not feel refreshed and energized. You would not feel joy or love, or experience the unique connection between people. And you would not feel pride, confidence, compassion, or a whole range of feelings that add to the experience of living.

Feelings provide you with valuable information. Some of that information can be lifesaving. For example, the ability to feel physical pain helps you to avoid further in-jury. Other feelings are more subtle. Feelings of sadness give you information that there is something you need to grieve. When you feel fear, the message is that something or someone is causing you to feel cautious. When you feel love, you are urged to open your heart to another.

Without your feelings, you would not have any knowledge about yourself. You would have a life free of emotions, but your existence would be robotic. You would not be able to connect with anything or anyone, and your world would be silenced.

Today I will let my emotions teach me something about myself.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The ladder of life is full of splinters, but they always pinch the hardest when we’re sliding down.

~ William L. Brownell ~

Climbing is usually difficult – shimmying up a tree, climbing stairs, moving up the corporate ladder, or moving ahead in school. All these actions involve effort and hard work and sometimes may not seem worth it for all the energy expended.

Yet if we failed a semester, lost a job, or fell down the stairs, we’d soon feel the effort was harder. The only payoffs we’d gain from such backward movement would be pain, loss, and abandonment. To pick ourselves up and start climbing again would require almost double the effort to regain the lost ground.

We need to keep moving upwards, keep reaching for the top. Keep on working toward higher goals, dreams, and ideals. It won’t be easy to constantly struggle to reach higher. But as long as we don’t look back or fall back, our lives will be filled with rewards. By moving ever upwards, we cannot fail.

There’s no going back to the pain and hurt. I need to keep moving up, up, up.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Repairing the damage

It really does not matter how much we used or drank. The important thing is what it was doing to us, how it was affecting our lives. The biggest cop-out for people with addiction has always been, “I’m not using as much as other people, so maybe I’m not chemically dependent.”

We couldn’t admit what using was doing to our lives, our families, and friends. It nearly destroyed us, but now we have a chance to repair the damage. If we are willing to accept ourselves and to turn our will and our lives over to our Higher Power, we can restore our lives.

Do I clearly see the destruction that my using caused?

Higher Power, help me today to accept my addiction and to stop using excuses to avoid the task of recovery.

One thing I will do today to begin repairing the damage caused by my using is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

A ship in port is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.

~ BENAZIR BHUTTO ~

Newcomer

I’ve been meaning to get started on the Fourth Step, but I just haven’t had enough time to myself.

Sponsor

Problems having to do with time are often about something else. If we’re procrastinating, usually it’s because we fear something.

For me, this fear is almost always the mistaken belief that I’m not worthy. I think that I won’t be able to do an adequate job or that others will devalue my efforts. And what if I’m a success? I may want success, but fear that I won’t be able to live up to the new, higher standards I’ll have set for myself.

If there’s something we want to do, we can find the time to begin it. Length of time is far less critical than consistency. For example, ten or fifteen minutes of writing every morning can add up to hundreds of pages in the course of a year. Whatever the project, we’ll probably find that we get more practiced and efficient as we go. As a result, the clarity of our vision and quality of our work will improve. Continuing our journey through the Steps will enhance the quality of our sober lives with greater freedom and self-esteem. We are worth it.

Today, I begin something I’ve been putting off.
I commit to continuing, a little bit at a time.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

When we take the first drink we invite the dead certainty of physical illness, untold sorrows, shame and degradation. That first drink has built more hospitals, jails, poorhouses and insane asylums than any other cause. All the drinks that follow are simply compounding the felony.

There are some people that can drink intelligently, but these people avoid difficulties. We are not in that class and experience has proven it. Years of sobriety will not enable us to join that class, and again, experience has proven it. Why do you persist in trying, what are you trying to prove? That you are the exception to the rule? If you are the exception you automatically become a freak.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Change your action; change your attitude.

2) No matter what predicament you find yourself in today, tomorrow can be different.

3) One Group, One Vote, One family

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they, too, have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.

Take kindly to the counsel of the years, surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at piece with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is stil a beautiful world. Strive to be happy.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

AS A MAN THINKETH

Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfill.

For verily I say unto you, “Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled (Matthew 5:17-18)

A “jot” or yod was the smallest letter in the Hebrew alphabet, like the Greek “iota.” A “tittle” (really “little horn”) is one of those tiny spurs or projections that distinguish certain Hebrew letters.

The scribes and the Pharisees were for the most part worthy men leading strictly moral lives according to appearances. Their faults were the weaknesses of the religious formalist everywhere—spiritual pride and self-righteousness. Of these faults they were unconscious—that is the deadly malice of these diseases of the soul—but they did strive to fulfill the law as they understood it. Jesus knew this, and he gave them credit for it. Here he warns his followers that unless their practical conduct is better than that of these people, they need not suppose that they are engaged on the spiritual path.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

A Better View of the Sky

Now that my house has burned, down, I have a better view of the sky.

~ Zen saying ~

I was startled to receive this letter from a successful Los Angeles artist: “During the recent fires, my house was leveled, along with my entire collection of paintings.” To my surprise, the next line read, “Now I am free! I am packing to go to the island of Kauai, where I will fulfill my lifelong dream of leading wilderness adventures.”

When an apparent disaster strikes and our life as we knew it is undone, it may be a blessing in disguise. The event could be clearing out an old pattern to make way for a new and more fulfilling life. See the situation not as a curse, but as an opportunity. The Chinese language character for crisis is a combination of two other symbols: danger and opportunity.

A Hawaiian gardener told me that gardeners in colder climates have an advantage over those in the tropics. The winter frost kills all microorganisms in the soil so that next spring’s crops are not subject to contamination from the previous year’s pests. Even when life seems frozen and desolate, growth and good are occurring behind the outer appearances.

In the Hindu religion, the god Shiva, ruler of destruction, is revered as much as Vishnu, the creator. The old must be cleared away to make way for the new.

Help me trust that changes beyond my control are working on my behalf.

I surrender to change and call it good. I release the old to make way for the new and better.

[caressa222]

April 23

Step by Step

Today, reflect on the choices and responsibilities of sponsorship. If I have progressed in my sobriety that I need to ask someone to sponsor me, where and how do I begin? My home group is fertile ground, and I may think about selecting three or four members, narrow them down to those I feel I can trust most and then approach that potential sponsor in confidence. If I am being asked to sponsor someone, however, I ask my higher power for the wisdom and responsibility before taking on such a sacred trust. Let me understand that sponsorship does not mean I am the sponsee’s pseudo-priest and that the job does not make me “preacher.” Today, I extend my recovery to include asking to be sponsored and, God willing, consenting to someone’s request to extend my hand to his. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERENITY

Cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind, and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.

~ Joseph Addison ~

Our Program allows us to stand back from day-to-day confusion and let serenity come into our lives. Our Program doesn’t take away all the struggle and problems from life, but it does let us learn a different outlook and attitude.

We don’t have to get caught up in every storm that blows our way. We don’t have to live the pain of every person who crosses our path. We don’t have to right every wrong.

Our recovery is a gift to us from a Power greater than we are. We become more and more aware of the meaning of the words in the Serenity Prayer: “God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.”

Let me learn to see the world as it actually is, not as I want it to be. I trust that my Higher Power didn’t make a mistake in designing this world or the plans for my life.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

We must find some spiritual basis for living, else we die.

~ Bill Wilson ~

When one of the founders of Alcoholics Anonymous wrote these words, he was speaking from the perspective of a recovering man. He knew that his addiction would kill him if he didn’t base his life on a spiritual footing. There is also such a thing as being spiritually dead while our physical bodies are still alive. Whether we are recovering from addiction or codependency, or walking some other healing path, our life force is rooted in our spiritual connection.

Just as an addiction grows and progresses through the span of our lives, so too, if we are consciously attentive, our spiritual development continues through the years of our lives. We grow stronger, become more accepting of ourselves and others, and feel more connected to the people and the world we live in.

Today conscious contact with my creator keeps me alive.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

To show great love for God and our neighbor, we need not do great things.

~ Mother Teresa ~

We don’t have to invent a cure for cancer or lift the burdens of a friend to prove our worth to other people. Being considerate of someone’s feelings is quite enough, and it is something any of us can do. It takes only a moment’s thought and the willingness to treat others as we’d like them to treat us. I he real blessing is that we feel much better each lime our heart guides our actions.

Loving others is perhaps the simplest of all actions we can take in this life. It requires no planning, no money, no muscle power, no problem solving. It’s a simple decision we can make daily or hourly. Every person we encounter, every situation we face, is an opportunity for us to hone the skill. And every loving act or thought makes the world a better place.

It’s human nature to treat others as we are treated If each of us becomes willing to offer the hand of love to someone else today, we will indeed have done a great thing!

I can make a worthwhile contribution today. I can be kind to a stranger.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I have a dual disorder, an illness like diabetes

I wonder if having a dual disorder is like having any other disease, say, like diabetes? Having a dual disorder makes me feel different, excluded, self-conscious. Sometimes it’s even hard to face people. Some seem afraid of me. They don’t understand my addiction and emotional problems.

But I have a no-fault illness, just like people with diabetes. I need professional help, just like people with diabetes. I deserve to be treated with respect and understanding, just like people with diabetes. I am in recovery—just like people diagnosed with diabetes.

When I feel stigmatized, I will call a friend for reassurance and support.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Mark Twain

Education doesn’t only happen within the four walls of a classroom or school. We can learn in almost every situation, at almost every moment of the day. Our teachers don’t need a wall covered with framed degrees from schools or universities. In some cases, our teachers are those who have been through what we have been through. They can light the way for us. Often, they have something we don’t—like serenity—that they are willing to share with us. They may teach us by being an example for us, or they may share with us how they found peace in recovery.

As learners, our main task is to keep an open mind, to be willing to listen, and to ask questions. Most important is our willingness to learn. The teacher usually appears when the student is ready.

Today may I be willing to listen and learn from other recovering people. May I also be willing to teach what I have learned.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible.

~ Mary McLeod Bethune ~

Have you ever seen the wind? You can see a kite flying up above, a sailboat navigating waters with air-filled sails, birds dipping and turning as they navigate wind currents, or leaves shivering on trees. Such things let you know the wind exists.

Faith is like the wind; it is something you feel but can-not see. Faith is not comprised of logic and reason, but a trust in something greater than yourself. Faith exists when you can see the beauty of life all around you—in budding flowers, a cloudless sky, a majestic ocean. It provides you with the strength to face a challenge you feel is insurmountable, and yet you conquer it. It is there when you feel that daylight will never come, and dawn breaks.

Faith is the belief that most things are possible. It gives you strength to steer the strong winds of change and al-lows you to find comfort in the calming breeze of God’s presence. Faith is trust that good will triumph over evil, that your sins can be forgiven, that your wrongdoings can be righted, and that the storms of your life can be navigated.

I have faith that I am being guided in my life by a presence greater than myself. Through this faith, I trust that anything is possible.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Man is born broken. He lives by mending. The grace of God is glue!

~ Eugene O’Neill ~

Has today been a day when we felt like we’ve fallen apart, faltered in our sense of direction, or lost confidence in ourselves? Tonight we may feel like we just can’t get it together-that it would be better for us to curl up in a tight ball and wait for a new day.

But the dawn of tomorrow will not work miracles upon us. It is up to us to get us back on track. When our shirt loses a button, we don’t throw away the shirt. We use a needle and thread and a little bit of patience to sew the button back on. The work we put into the shirt doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to make the shirt wearable again.

Tonight we need to take time to mend ourselves. And we have the tools to do this – our Higher Power, literature, and meditation. These are our needle and thread. Through the grace of God, we’ve been given all that we need to mend ourselves.

How can I use the tools of the program to rebuild myself?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Overcoming the urge

When you feel the urge to use, think it all the way through. This is a critical step in staying away from that first drink, pill, or fix. Some-times we’re confronted with situations where it seems we have no defense against the first one. So then we ask ourselves, What did my fellow addicts say to do?

They said; “Think it through” to its logical conclusion. For us that first drink, pill, or fix can mean wreckage and despair. And with such a thought to the consequences, we will gain the resolve to overcome the urge.

Do I know how to overcome the urge?

Higher Power, when my defenses are down, grant me the presence of mind to think the act of using all the way through.

If I feel the urge to use today, I will reflect on the consequences, such as

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

© 1974, 1998 by Hazelden Foundation

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The moment one definitely commits oneself then Providence moves too.

~ JOHANN WOLFGANG VON GOETHE ~

Newcomer

I sat down last night and tried to begin writing my Fourth Step. So many feelings went swirling through me that I got completely blocked. My life is full of things I feel embarrassed and ashamed about. There are secrets I’ve never told anyone. Some of these things are just too personal. How am I ever going to share them with another human being?

Sponsor

No wonder you’re anxious. It sounds as if you’re trying to do Step Five before you’ve begun Step Four. Each Step involves taking a specific action and having the willingness and faith to complete that action. In Step Four, the action is to write, and to be fearless and thorough as we do so. The Step doesn’t mention sharing what we write. It’s premature to decide whom to share with, and it’s counterproductive, in any case, to speculate about how someone is going to respond. Today, it’s just you, putting words on paper—that is your focus in the present moment.

I’m glad that you’ve shared your fear of this task with me. When we speak out loud about a fear, it begins to lose its power over us. As we so often hear in meetings, the opposite of fear is faith. We can pray for courage as we begin this Step. We can continue to pray each time fear arises in the process of writing.

I promise that by the time you’ve completed your Fourth Step, the process will have moved you to a new place, one you can’t really know or understand ahead of time. Only then will you be ready for the next Step.

Today, I stay focused on the present and on the task at hand. I let past and future go. I remember to breathe, as I replace fear with faith.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It would be possible for a nation, or even the world, to exist without many of the natural resources we have, but no nation could exist without men. The strength of the nation is the strength of its men.

The men who comprise the population of the nation are individuals and the sum total of the virtues of the individuals is the character of the nation.

Our value to society is not our newfound sobriety but our new character as developed by our new and better way of living.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Never Alone

2) Short version of the serenity prayer: Forget it!

3) Stop Global Whining

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Letting Go

As children bring their broken toys
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God,
Because God is my friend.
But then, instead of leaving my Higher Power
In peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help,
With ways that were my own.
At last, I snatched them back and cried,
“How can You be so slow?”
“My child,” God said, “what could I do?
You never did let go.”

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

COMING OF AGE

As you grow in spiritual power and understanding you will find that many outer regulations will become unnecessary; but this will be because you have really risen above them. This point in your development, where your understanding of Truth enables you to dispense with certain outer props and regulations, is the spiritual coming of age.

However, this spiritual coming of age cannot be hurried or forced, but must appear when the consciousness is ready, exactly as the flowering of a bulb can only be the result of natural growth. You have to demonstrate where you are. To seek to demonstrate beyond your understanding is not spiritual. Fix your attention upon spiritual things, and without consciously trying to make haste you will be amazed to discover the pace at which your soul has hastened.

To take a simple example: Suppose that in a street accident you find that a man has severed an artery and blood is spurting out. The normal course is that unless this bleeding is stopped the victim will die. Now, what is the spiritual attitude to take in such a case? Claim the ability of God to heal. If your faith is strong enough the severed artery will immediately be healed. But if your faith fails, you must take the usual steps to save the man’s life by immediately improvising a tourniquet, or whatever the proper procedure may be, still claiming divine aid.

Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised) . . . (Hebrews 10:23)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

When the Time is Right

To everything there is a season, a time to every purpose under heaven.

~ Ecclesiastes 3:1 ~

C.Y. O’Connor’s dream was to build a water pipeline to irrigate parched terrain east of Perth, Australia. After years of planning and labor, the aqueduct was constructed, and throngs stood at the mouth of the huge conduit to see the first drops of liquid life. But when the valve was opened, nothing appeared. The next day, O’Connor was found dead in his home; the failure of his dream was too much for him to live with. Several days later, a trickle of water appeared at the mouth of the pipeline, and before long, water was gushing abundantly. The only thing that went wrong was his idea of when it would happen.

The early Bible, recorded in Greek, uses two different words for our word time. Chronos is the Biblical word for the time of day, which we translate into hours, minutes, and seconds. The other word, kairos, means, “in nature’s time,” or “in due time.” There is a divine order to life, and timing is a part of it.

If you feel frustrated or disappointed over lack of results on a project, hang in there and have some patience. If your venture is a good one, you will see the results. Perhaps not in chronos, your idea of the right time, but in kairos, the right time—the one appointed by Spirit. If you have done all you can to make something happen, and nothing seems to be coming of it, turn it over to God. Nurture your Spirit, and trust the universe to support you.

Give me the trust to know that all things are working in my favor, even when it does not appear to be so. Help me move beyond discouragement and see my dreams through to completion.

God’s timing is perfect. Divine order is operating now.

[caressa222]

April 24

Step by Step

Today, the link between consequences and responsibility – and an appreciation that I and I alone am responsible to the consequences of all my behavior and choices, including drinking, and that excuses and justifications will not spare me either consequences or responsibility. The program’s 12th step requirement to “practice these principles in all (my) affairs” implies that to live by AA’s principles I must not try to weasel out of owning my feelings, actions and behavior and the consequences of each. If, for example, I slip or relapse, I cannot blame anything but myself because, in the end, I made the choice to drink. No one tied me down and poured it down my throat, and I and no one else will endure the physical and emotional consequences of my choice to drink. Today, I am mindful that all I say, do and feel will bear consequences and that I alone am responsible to those consequences. And if I want to avoid responsibility for consequences, the “out” is clear: don’t do what I don’t want to be responsible for. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FAMILY

The family is the association established by nature for the supply of man’s everyday wants.

~ Aristotle ~

The bond between us and our families becomes tighter in recovery. It’s not because they understand or appreciate us more. It’s because we understand and appreciate them more. We come to grips with our personal history in our Fourth and Fifth Steps. We are given a clearer point of view on all our relationships. We take more responsibility for what happens to our families, because we learn that we are more than just guiltless victims.

Our Eighth and Ninth Steps let us admit our part in family relationships and mend fences that have been torn down. Our family bonds become tighter because we know we’re forgiven. We ask to share that forgiveness with our loved ones.

All of us in our families are loved by our Higher Power. I don’t regret the fact that I can’t change the past. I rejoice that the future is open.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

You see the one that I am, not the one that I was. But the one that I was is also still part of myself.

~ Jean Amery ~

Our stories are central to our recovery. We tell them because they remind us where we came from. We live in the present moment, but our history is part of our identity. It isn’t the total of our identity, but it informs our healing. It’s the mine where we dig for the nuggets of wisdom for living today, and it gives us the drive and encouragement to continue our progress. We don’t tell our stories to wallow in the shame and guilt we felt or to gain sympathy for our suffering. And we don’t tell them to revel in the euphoria of the highs we experienced.

In telling our stories, others get to know us better because our history is part of our very selves. In that process, we cannot help but listen to ourselves speak the truth, and thereby we put together the puzzle pieces of our selves. Taking the risk of saying where we came from provides the rewards of feeling accepted by others.

I am grateful for telling my story and knowing that I am more than the man I once was.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Be spontaneous but not impetuous.

~ Kay Lovatt ~

Responding to the rhythm of the moment often blesses us with unexpected opportunities. Living in the present moment, rather than in yesterday or tomorrow, gives us our only chance for real growth and for knowing God.

Acting too quickly, however, without thinking of potential consequences, can cause extra problems for us. Taking advantage of an opportunity before it disappears doesn’t mean acting thoughtlessly. Every circumstance we experience deserves a thoughtful reaction. When we rush to respond, we fail to hear our inner voice, which reflects our Higher Power’s guidance.

We waste time when we focus on the past or future. Why do we complicate our lives so much? Thoughtfully experiencing each present minute gives us the gifts and the growth we deserve.

I will return my attention to right now every time it slips into yesterday or tomorrow.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can help myself by taking medication

I did not want to take psychiatric medication for three reasons: I didn’t want to admit the seriousness of my problem; I didn’t want to feel ashamed; I didn’t trust it.

For a long time I fought the idea—and then I hit a bottom. I realized that although counselling was helping, it wasn’t working fast enough. I didn’t have to keep suffering such intense and disabling feelings. I fear that if I didn’t get stable, I might need to be hospitalized. By taking prescribed medication, I saw that I would be taking good care of myself.

I will carefully follow my medication instructions and thank my higher power for this kind of help.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We live in a moment of history where change is so speeded up that we begin to see the present only where it is already disappearing.

~ R.D. Laing ~

Life can be like a fishbowl in which we swim round and round, chasing our own tails. When we become obsessed with a problem, we may get stuck in its pain and lose sight of the solution. The more we worry, the more we seem to fearfully project into the future. Fear has been described as Future Events Appear Real. As soon as we step out of today and into tomorrow, we invite fear to join us.

Living for today is the ability to stand back and be objective about what we can change and what we can’t. It is our acceptance of our own limitations and powerlessness. It is the wisdom not to bite off chunks of life too big for us to swallow in one day.

Living for today, we realize that this 24 hours, well-lived, will grow into happier tomorrows.

Today let me get out of tomorrow’s driver’s seat. Let me live in the present.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I was thought to be “stuck up.” I wasn’t. I was just sure oj myself.

~ Bette Davis ~

Do you remember the children’s story about the little engine that could? By chanting “I think I can, I think I can,” the little engine succeeded in traversing a difficult line of tracks and was filled with pride.

Confidence is built by beginning any task with a frame of mind based on “I think I can.” Phrases such as “I should,” “I ought,” or “I might” are not confidence-building words because they express doubt in your abilities and leave the door open to the failure you are likely to expect. Know that you may not always succeed on the first try, but what you learn from that attempt is not failure. Rather, you gain knowledge on how you can approach the task again, and come closer to achieving success.

Remember that the greatest challenge in your life has been entering a program of recovery. You are like the little engine that could—and did. Each day you are clean and sober, you have lived by the words “I think I can.” Continue to build your confidence by remembering what it took to get to where you are right now. With this confidence, you can get to where you need to go.

Each day I build confidence in my abilities to face and conquer challenges.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Being sorry for myself is a luxury I can’t afford.

~ Stephen King and Peter Straub ~

We have surrounded ourselves with many luxuries to enhance our lives; microwave ovens, color televisions, clothes, jewelry, and so on. We may have purchased these items even if we couldn’t really afford them – just as long as we could have them and use them.

Some of the things that are also important to us are our negative emotions: depression, sell-pity, selfish-ness, ungratefulness, or anger. But what if we had to pay for the luxury of feeling each of these feelings? Would we be able to afford a week of self-pity? An hour of anger? Or several minutes of selfishness?

The value we place upon the material things in our lives can also be placed on the emotions we feel each day and night. Our positive emotions can enrich us, but our negative emotions will leave us in debt.

Am I rich enough to waste time feeling sorry for myself? How can I use my resources wisely?

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Dealing with daily problems

For many of us, chemicals were an escape from the trials of the world. We deeply resented them and earnestly sought escape. Simply getting clean and sober did not wipe away all our problems. Now, however, we have an opportunity to deal with them constructively.

If we do not take that first pill, drink, or fix, our problems can be solved, and stumbling blocks can become stepping stones to a better life.

Am I learning how to deal with daily problems?

Higher Power, I pray to accept my daily problems and for your help in dealing with them.

One thing I will do today to deal constructively with my problems is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

There but for the grace of God go I.

~ OLD SAYING, SOURCE OF A PROGRAM SLOGAN ~

Newcomer

I hear some people talk about the truly terrible depths they sank to when they were active in their addictions. That’s not me, though. I’ve always had a roof over my head. The bills got paid. I always got to work on time and did what I was supposed to do. I feel sorry for anyone who’s gone through such debasing experiences, but I don’t really relate to them.

Sponsor

Those who have lost everything and then entered recovery are blessed with clarity. They don’t have to entertain doubts about where addiction can bring us—any of us. If we persist in addiction, we will lose health, home, friends, reputation, work, purpose, and soul. I learn from listening to their stories what extremes my addiction is capable of taking me to if I go back to using.

Addiction is often called a disease of denial. No addict wants to admit to having an addiction. I clung to my excuses like a life raft. If I met certain minimum requirements of work and civilized behavior, I could rationalize away the thought that I had a problem. I functioned more or less adequately in spite of my addiction. This fact fed my denial and postponed my surrender.

Many of us carry our denial into recovery. Some days denial rears its head more insistently than others. The best medicine for denial is to listen with an open mind, to identify with others’ feelings, and to share our own memories of active addiction.

Today, I honor my urge for healing. As I listen to others in recovery, I identify with the feelings they share.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The reasoning of the practicing alcoholic is in such foul shape that he is apt that he is apt to take any attitude on the drinking question and usually does.

It is unreasonable to expect them to view their own or anyone else’s sobriety in a rational way. Naturally plain common sense is not possible in the midst of an alcoholic fog, but why – oh, why do so many practicing alcoholics, including slipees, invariably persist in looking for the most insecure member of AA in their quest for a drinking partner?

If you are homesick for the gutter, go on back to it, but don’t take anyone with you.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) HOW: Honest, Open-minded and Willing

2) Courage is fear in action.

3) Our lives become so different once we learn to magnify our blessings the way we do our troubles.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Letter

Dear Friend,

How are you? I just had to send a note to tell you how much I care about you.

I saw you yesterday as you were talking with your friends. I waited all day hoping you would want to talk to me too. I gave you a sunset to close your day and a cool breeze to rest you—and I waited. You never came. It hurt me, but I still love you because I am your friend.

I saw you sleeping last night and longed to touch your brow, so I spilled moonlight upon your face. Again I waited, wanting to rush down so we could talk. I have so many gifts for you! You awoke and rushed off to work. My tears were in the rain.

If you would only listen to me! I love you! I try to tell you in blue skies and in the quiet green grass. I whisper it in leaves on the trees and breathe it in colors of flowers, shout it to you in mountain streams, give the birds love songs to sing. My love for you is deeper than the ocean, and bigger than the biggest need in your heart!

Ask me! Talk to me! Please don’t forget me. I have so much to share with you!

I won’t hassle you any further. It is your decision. I have chosen you and I will wait.

I love you. Your friend,

God

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

STRIVING FOR PERFECTION

What of the man who is conscious of considerable moral imperfection, perhaps of the habit of grave sin, and is at the same time sincerely desirous of spiritual growth? Is he to relinquish the quest for spiritual knowledge until he has first reformed his conduct? By no means. As a matter of fact any attempt to improve himself morally without spiritual aid is foredoomed to failure. The thing to do is to pray regularly and to throw the responsibility for success upon God. The man must carry on, no matter how many times he may fail. Let him keep affirming that God is helping him, and that his own real nature is spiritual and perfect. In this way moral regeneration and spiritual unfoldment will go hand in hand. The Christian life does not require that we possess perfection of character, or else, which of us would be able to live it? What it does require is honest, genuine striving for that perfection.

. . . he that is perfect in knowledge is with thee (Job 36:4).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Nothing to Protect

Tour days are short here; this is the last of your springs. And now in the serenity and quiet of this lovely lace, touch the depths of truth, feel the hem of heaven.

~ Adlai Stevenson ~

When my mother was undergoing chemotherapy, she lost her hair. At first she joked about it, but then she became self- conscious and bought a wig, which she wore at all times. During the final weeks of her life, she was too ill to care about how she looked, and she renounced the wig. I felt jarred to see her without hair, and yet in my heart I applauded her for going beyond her concern for appearances. She was finally free.

Children and older people are the most honest because they have no investment in the games other people believe they have to maintain. The elderly and the very young do not have a vested interest in power, money, sex, prestige, status, and appearances. They are trying not to change the world or get a lot from it. They can tell the truth without fear of losing. Their delight in being what they are far outweighs any glitter the world may offer.

Some of the greatest wisdom is uttered by the young and the elderly. While we usually notice children’s jewels, often we overlook the wisdom of the aged. One of the great tragedies of our culture is that we do not respect our ancestors. By not doing so, we dishonor the elderly who live among us, and we hurt ourselves by missing out on the wisdom and blessings they have to offer. My Japanese friend told me that every Oriental home has a place of honor for the family’s ancestors. The family prays and makes offerings daily to the memory of their forebears.

Let us learn from the young and the old, that we may be as free as they are and rise above the distractions of the years in between. Is anything really worth compromising the truth? Let us bless our young and elders for the wisdom and legacy they impart.

I pray to keep the flame of truth burning above all other desires.

In the truth I am free.

[caressa222]

April 25

Step by Step

Today, understand we cannot claim credit if someone we sponsor or to whom we have carried the message has found sobriety. Likewise, let us not feel that we have failed a sponsee or co-member who continues in active alcoholism. To claim credit for anyone else’s sobriety or blame for their continued drinking fires our ego and, because of it, we break the commandment to be only a carrier of the message. Just as we cannot credit anyone for our sobriety other than the program or blame our drinking on someone or something other than ourselves, we cannot claim credit for another person’s recovery. Today, let us remember that we are a messenger, not the message. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

DON’T PROJECT

What we anticipate seldom occurs. What we least expected generally happens.

~ Disraeli ~

We are not in the business of getting results. It’s easy and simple to plan results. It’s not so easy to just plan and not expect results.

When we think a plan of ours will bring us and mankind all sorts of payoff, we are playing god again. When our plan doesn’t turn out the way we expected, we put ourselves in danger of feeling hopeless. This can lead to relapse.

We remember the past only for what its lessons have taught us about living today. If yesterday was spent in planning how today was supposed to turn out, we will usually be disappointed in today. Today hardly ever turns out the way we had planned or expected it to turn out.

My plans for the future must stay hopes and possibilities. No matter how far I fall short of my plans, I must accept the results with serenity. I will work at making plans, but I won’t plan the results.

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Listen to your body. Do not be a blind and deaf tenant.

~ Dr. George Sheehan ~

We were taught that masculinity means ignoring pain, disregarding the sensations that arise within our bodies. A warrior in battle needs to do that in order to save his life. When a man can ignore his pain because of a more pressing goal, he has a valuable skill. But we aren’t living in a battle zone every day. And a wise man uses his skills selectively. When we are driving down an open highway on a sunny, warm day, we use different skills than when driving on ice.

Part of our recovery requires that we grow beyond some of the stereotypes of what a man is. A one-trick pony can’t adapt to a new show. When we are in the safety of an intimate relationship, we need to know what we feel and express it. We need the skills to pay attention to our internal messages, because they are also guides.

Today I will have the wisdom to listen to the messages of my body and my heart.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Healing is learning to trust my own wisdom, my own intuition.

~ Mary Zink ~

Being insecure is common with our disease. Some think insecurity triggered our abuse of chemicals. Yet it doesn’t matter which came first, the chemical abuse or the insecurity. They were good partners for years. Unfortunately, the partnership left us bankrupt!

Getting into recovery is like putting money in the bank. Working the Steps, going to meetings, getting a sponsor, being a sponsor, and taking time every day to commune with our Higher Power are I he deposits we make in our account. When we hit u rough spot, we have something to fall back on.

Believing that we can think clearly about the important matters in our lives is concrete progress. Our confidence about handling problems is growing. In time, what used to baffle us no longer will.

I am wise. I’ll know what to do today in every situation if I open my heart to my Higher Power.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am finding the help I need

I managed to stop using and get my psychiatric symptoms under control in treatment. But once out, I wasn’t sure I could stay straight and stable. I was afraid I would get sick again under stress or with strong cravings. I was afraid I couldn’t manage on my own.

But finally, when the fear got strong enough, I went to a recovery meeting to look for help. And over the course of several weeks, I could tell that I had found it: the consistency, structure, and spirituality of the meeting itself combined with the respectful, caring, and consistent support of a sponsor (or guide, mentor, helper). I now had one way to help me mange my disability on my own.

I will write down two reasons why I need help to recover and the name of someone who can help me.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Take it easy — but not too easy.

~ Bob B. ~

In the early days of recovery, we’re so grateful to be alive that we’ll do anything, sacrifice anything, to change. Then, bit by bit, we may be tempted to slip back into our old ways. Sometimes we make excuses to skip a meeting, or we lose contact with our sponsor. We need daily reminders of how dangerous this kind of thinking can be. What will we sacrifice in exchange for our recovery? Is recovery worth giving up a social event? Overtime at work? A movie, a play, the ballet, a concert? Spring cleaning? Although recreation is important, we often wonder what excuses we have used to avoid the daily work of recovery.

Without our program of recovery, we had none of these things to sacrifice. When we began recovery, we may have had no home, no friends, no family, no job. Now, we have a life again. Now, we have choices. Now, we have support from people who accept us as we are, and who know the struggles we are facing. Now, we have a Higher Power who will love and support us in the worst trouble. Now, this moment, we can choose life over death simply by making a call and sharing our gratitude for a new life, or by asking for the help we need. This is all the power we need today.

Today let me remember all that is good in my life and work to keep it.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.

~ Harriet Breaker ~

Beavers are often considered perfect engineers. The dams they create out of sticks and branches, green vegetation, and mud can still raging rivers and create a unique under-water living environment. They are dedicated workers that immediately take action when humans or natural elements conspire to destroy their dams. Even dams that have been broken down repeatedly are rebuilt.

Even beavers are not perfect as their dams do break. It might be better to think of them as tireless in their quest to create optimal survival conditions. Their dams are not works of beauty, nor is there one perfect dam-building pattern. But each dam is purposeful and functional.

Similarly, how you approach recovery determines the level of your success. If you strive to do everything per-fectly, chances are little or nothing you can accomplish will result in the perfect outcome you desire. But if you work tirelessly at your recovery, to build and rebuild whenever necessary, and to create the best possible life for yourself, then you will accomplish much. Success is measured by your dedication to see your work through to completion, even if completion comes after several tries.

I will strive for achievement and success in all that I do, rather than for perfection.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Ignorance is the night of the mind, but a night without moon or star

~ Confucius ~

Long ago, before the advent of radar systems, navigators and explorers found it impossible to proceed on cloudy nights. Without the moon or stars to guide them, they lost their sense of direction and the light by which to see. They were powerless and had to accept their inability to progress under such conditions.

Tonight may seem like a cloudy night. We may feel lost or directionless, or we may feel as if we’ve stayed in the same emotional space. We may pray in desperation for movement and change, only to feel as if our prayers go unanswered. Like a car mired in mud, we may be spinning our wheels and going nowhere.

Acceptance, then, is our answer. Just because our prayers haven’t brought the results we’ve wanted doesn’t mean no one has listened. Our prayers were heard, and the answer was to stay where we were and wait. Our journey is being prepared for us. Soon the clouds will roll away, the moon and stars will guide us. Our Higher Power’s will, not ours, is what we have to accept.

Even though I may feel like I’m going nowhere, tonight I can turn my life and my will over to the care of my Higher Power.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Coming alive to life

How important is awareness! By drinking or drugging we tried to dull our awareness, although perhaps we excused some drugs by insisting that we were heightening our awareness. We always wound up with awareness of little but pain. We were deadened and uninterested in life.

Communication is based on awareness: Through communication, we make others aware of us and we are made aware of those around us. Without communication with God, there is no awareness of God working in our lives. If we want to come alive to life, we can begin by paying attention to our Higher Power.

Am I coming alive and paying attention?

I pray to become more aware of my Higher Power and of life.

Today I will slow down and pay closer attention to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Home, in one form or another, is the great object of life.

~ JOSIAH HOLLAND ~

Newcomer

I know this sounds trivial, but it’s still bothering me. My house is a mess. It feels out of control. It’s going to take forever to get it together. It’s not the sort of thing I can ask someone to help me with; I’m ashamed to let anyone see it.

Sponsor

In early recovery, we may crave change, but feel too de-pressed to know how to go about it. We may be overwhelmed just thinking of all the work involved in clearing up the wreckage of the past, whether it involves a messy house, unpaid bills, back taxes, work commitments, or personal promises.

As with so many chores, we can approach cleaning house little by little. Instead of pulling everything out of all the closets, we can limit ourselves to fifteen minutes or half an hour to fill a trash bag with things we don’t want in our lives any more. If we can’t simply throw things away, we can start filling a carton for a charitable organization. Short periods of time once or twice a week eventually add up.

Recovery began with a single action. Taking the First

Step prepared us for the Second. There are times when we feel we’re at a standstill, others when we progress rapidly. The overall length of time isn’t the point; it’s the quality of the ongoing process. We can begin it at any time.

One more thing: are we really so much worse than everyone around us that we can’t ask for help? If we can’t accept hands-on help, how about making phone calls before, during, and after tough chores?

Today, I take one step toward creating order.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Man is a pretty smart duck, but after all these centuries of study, experimentation and reasoning, we still don’t know what we are, where our life came from, or what happens to it when we die. True we have certain faiths and beliefs, but who can say with certainty and with personal knowledge, exactly what the answer to the Great Enigma really is?

We have unlocked many of the secrets of Nature but we still don’t know what we are, how we got here or where we will go when we leave.

God still has many secrets. If man knew them all there would be no incentive to know God better.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Sometimes our individual actions damage the group.

2) N—****ing—A

3) Short version of the Serenity Prayer—”F” it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Live A Little Just To Please

Can you say today in honesty
As the hours slip by so fast,
That you’ve helped a single person
Of the many you have passed?

Did you waste the day, or lose it?
Was it well or properly spent?
Did you leave a trail of kindness
Or mementos of discontent?

Have you given God a moment
In humble, devout prayer?
Have you talked with Him in honesty
To let Him know you care?

As you close your eyes in slumber,
Do you think that God would say,
“You have made the world much better,
For you lived a lot today?”

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

NECESSITY FOR SELF-CONTROL

Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shall not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgement:

But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgement: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council; but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire (Matthew 5:21-22)

The Old Law said “Thou shall not kill,” but Jesus says that even to want to kill, nay, even to be angry with your brother, is sufficient to keep you out of the Kingdom of Heaven. It was a distinct gain when primitive people could be persuaded not to murder but to develop sufficient self-control to master their anger. Spiritual demonstration demands that anger itself be overcome. It is simply not possible to get any experience of God worth talking about, or to exercise spiritual power until you have gotten rid of resentments and condemnation. You can have either your demonstration or your indignation, but you cannot have both.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Best When It’s Worst

Consider that people are like tea bags. They don’t know their own strength until they get into hot water.

~ Dan McKinnon ~

In the film Starman, an extraterrestrial comes to earth to study life on this planet. Like many such visitors, he does not receive a very kindly welcome and spends most of his time fleeing from authorities. In the process, he falls in love with a woman who befriends him. Finally he must leave, and he has a few short moments to say good-bye to his beloved. “Do you know what I learned about human beings?” he asks. “I learned that when things are at their worst, you are at your best.”

Adversity is a gift if we make it work on our behalf. Challenge is not a curse or a punishment, but an opportunity to shine. If life were easy all the time, we would not deepen in love, compassion, and wisdom, or learn how to sink a pipeline into the well of true strength within us. Often we do not know how powerful we are until we are faced with a challenge that draws forth our greatness.

In high school I took a typing class. By the end of the course, I had built up my speed to about 40 words a minute. The time came for the final exam, on which a large part of my grade depended. I focused intently and scored a smashing 64 words a minute—over 50 percent faster than my regular speed! Why did I do so well? I knew it counted for a lot.

When an act in life counts, there is a source of strength within us that grows to meet the challenge. Some people demonstrate superhuman abilities, such as pushing a wrecked car off an injured person. Where do they find the strength? It was within them all the time; the worst brought out the best.

I pray to be big enough to handle whatever comes before me.
With Your help, I can and will do anything.

The power of God is within me. The Grace of God surrounds me.

[caressa222]

April 26

Step by Step

Today, wisdom to appreciate the power of the spoken word, the one spoken in anger, fear, frustration or sarcasm and which can inflict more damage than any destructive act of my drinking days. Let me understand that a single word can do hurt and injury that might not be healed by any amend I might make. And even if my amend or apology is accepted, the injury and hurt may cut so deeply in the person against whom the wrong word is spoken that something can still be forever lost. I pray for guidance in the 12th Step to practice the program's principles in all my affairs, including not caving into the impulsiveness or anger of unleashing a word that is intended to hurt. Today, I think before I speak, especially if I am angry, frustrated or afraid, because I cannot unspeak it - and atonement may not be enough to repair the damage. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2016

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ACTION

Willingness without action is fantasy.

~ Anonymous ~

The best way to get ready for action is to pray. Prayer makes us ready for success. Sometimes our prayers tell us to go right or go left. Sometimes they just tell us to stand still and wait for orders.

When we are willing to pray, we are willing to act. When we are willing, we are filled with prayer. Prayer always comes before and action.

When we see those that admit they are willing to act but don’t lift a finger to help themselves, we don’t know what to think. Maybe they are still in the watching phase. Maybe the instruction aren’t clear. Or maybe they just haven’t prayed.

When I see anyone who is not growing, I will encourage them to pray, attend meetings, and work twice as hard on their Step work.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Although the world is full of suffering it is also full of overcoming it.

~ Helen Keller ~

We are born into a life with both pain and joy. That mix is inevitable, no matter what our status in life. If today’s combination seems more filled with difficulty or challenge, it also contains the possibilities for coping with it. We can take some steps today that will move us toward overcoming our challenges. We must avoid feeling defeated if we cannot totally fix our problems all at once. And most certainly, there are unseen forces at work, forces that continually bring change.

Let us accept that life always changes. Never can we place a clamp on some perfect day and hold ourselves there permanently. So we ride the ups and downs, we meet our pain and suffering, and we overcome it.

Today, as I face difficulty and rise to its challenges, I will have an attitude of acceptance.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Many of us think that attaining status and financial success will make us happy.

~ Helene Lerner-Robbins ~

Maybe we have to attain status and material wealth before we realize that it doesn’t fulfill us. If we grew up in unhappy homes, we may have thought that material objects would change our lives. To discover otherwise takes wisdom, and we are only now seeking that.

The attainment of wisdom gives us the happiness we have sought everywhere else in our past. All that we longed for comes to us when we stop the rush to attain things and focus instead on the miracle of our spiritual being. Life is full of wonderful paradoxes; utilizing the tools of this program helps us discover them.

Let’s not mislead ourselves. Having status and financial success doesn’t preclude happiness; it just won’t guarantee it. Finding God and settling for wisdom does.

I don’t need anything special to be happy. My reliance on my Higher Power will give me lasting happiness.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

My emotions are connected to my body

It started when I was a child: whenever I felt sick to my stomach, I got sad and scared. I had an emotional reaction to what was going on in my body. In short, I felt awful.

In recovery, I notice this pattern in reverse: I have a physical reaction to my emotions. When I get upset or feel depressed, I may quickly feel tired and achy. Sometimes I even get a stomachache (although I no longer use drugs or alcohol). But I don’t feel awful. The difference is that over time I have learned that my mood affects the way my body feels, just as my body affects my mood. Understanding this important relationship helps me stay focused on the problem.

Three times today I will note my mood and how my body feels.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Questions are never indiscreet, answers sometimes are.

~ Oscar Wilde ~

Over and over again, we circle the same thoughts in our head, certain that if we keep chewing on them, we’ll be better able to make important decisions. Should we commit ourselves to a new relationship? Is it time to take a new job? Do we need to stand up for a principle?

The harder we tiy to make that “perfect decision,” the tighter and more obsessed we become. It starts to feel like the most important decision of our lives. The very process of decision-making becomes a problem.

Instead of recycling the same thoughts, let us ask, “What’s the worst thing that can happen if we choose a given path today?” “Is this decision in sync with ourselves and our recovery?” “Will it work for today?” When we answer these questions, our choices are clear. And when we make positive, healthy decisions, the cycle of worry can stop. Our lives are more serene, more productive, and more calm.

Today help me to keep my perspective. No decision is without risk —but few are irreversible.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

When you cease to make a contribution you begin to die.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

Do you consider yourself to be charitable when you give away old clothing and the things you no longer want? Do you feel a sense of righteousness when you write a check to a nonprofit organization? While these are good and laudable things to do, such actions keep you at a distance from those receiving your charity. It is one thing to pack up a bag full of clothing and put it into the chute of a metal container; it is entirely another to offer your time and provide direct care—the greatest gift those in need can receive.

George Sand once wrote, “Charity degrades those who receive it and hardens those who dispense it.” It cannot be easy for someone who has next to nothing to accept the material goods of another.

To be of greater use to others, set aside time to interact with the elderly at a senior center, offer tutoring services to homeless children, or serve meals at a shelter. Such things can open your eyes to the needs of others so you can see the difference your contributions truly make.

Today I will consider ways in which I can truly contribute to those in need. Then I will devote time to providing my attention and care.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

If you have knowledge, let others light their candles at it

~ Margaret Fuller ~

We are seen as powerful examples every time we speak at a meeting, offer encouragement, and give support to those in need. The knowledge we’ve gathered from the strength and hope of the program is a gift to share with others.

If we've ever seen a candlelight ceremony, we know how powerful one candle can be. Countless tapers can be lit until a room is brilliant with light. Our knowledge of the program is kept alive by a tiny candle within us. And each time we share our knowledge, we have the ability to light the candles of others.

Sometimes we may feel our faith and hope lessen and our candlelight begins to flicker and dim. Yet we can light our faltering candles again from the knowledge of another. We are all candlelighters to each other. This gift assures that we'll never be in the dark. We ll always have the ability to gather light and to give it.

I will let others light their candles from mine, thereby sharing the light of the hope in the program.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Doing what it takes

This universe is beautiful, but it doesn’t owe us a living. We can’t ask for results before we put forth the effort. We can’t be using mood-altering drugs and tell ourselves we’ll straighten up when we get a job. It doesn’t work that way.

We have to be willing to do what it takes to straighten up first—then we get the benefits. We have to be willing to do it God’s way, notours.

Am I willing to do what it takes?

Higher Power, grant me the willingness to put forth the effort today, to work the Steps, to stay sober and dean.

To stay clean and sober today, I will

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a foot

~ GEORGE SANTAYANA ~

Newcomer

I feel close to tears today, for no good reason. Listening to someone talking about his children, I actually did start to cry, and later I came close to tears again just because someone asked me how I was feeling. Everything has been going so well, and now this! I don’t want to be one of those people who are full of self-pity, and I don’t want my boss or my friends to think that my emotions are out of control.

Sponsor

When I was active in my disease, I rarely laughed or cried from the heart. Whether I felt sad or happy, angry or afraid, any feeling made me uncomfortable; a strong emotion was a signal to medicate myself. In early recovery, even after we have gone through physical withdrawal, our tears may flow seemingly for no reason as our bodies and spirits cleanse themselves and restore inner balance. There is no such thing as a “wrong” feeling. Nowadays, though I don’t need to cry as often, I can let others see my feelings without fear of being judged; my new willingness just to be myself helps others— it lets them see that they, too, are free to be themselves.

Today, I don't have to deny or judge my feelings or the feelings of others.
Tears and laughter are both gifts of my recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Many of us came into AA either in middle life or beyond and feel that with our reasonable life expectancy, it is practically impossible to atone for our previous wrong actions. The thief at the crucifixion probably thought the same thing, but by one single act he brought the promises that “this day thou shalt be with me in Paradise.”

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

I Am Me

In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone choose it. I own everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own all my triumphs and successes, all of my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By doing so, I can love me and be friendly with me in all of my parts. I know there are aspects that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know, but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously look for solutions to the puzzles and for ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me, and therefore I can engineer me. I am me and I am okay.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

DANGER OF ANGER

Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath aught against thee;

Leave there thy gift before the alter, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift (Matthew 5:23-24).

Indignation, resentment, the desire to punish other people, the desire to “get Even,” the feeling “it serves him right”; all these things form a quite impenetrable barrier to spiritual power. Jesus says that if you are bringing a gift to the altar, and you remember that your brother has anything against you, you must put down your gift and go make peace with your brother; when you have done that, your offering will be acceptable.

Jesus builds up this tremendous lesson in the Oriental tradition. He says first that whoever is angry with his brother shall be in danger; second that to be hostile to another, is to be in grave danger; and finally that to hold so low an opinion about a fellow creature as to consider him outside the pale, is to shut ourselves off from any hope of spiritual fruit while we remain in this state of mind.

Note carefully that the King James version of the Bible here makes a serious error, which has been corrected in the revised version. It interpolates a phrase not in the earliest manuscripts and make Jesus say, “Whosoever is angry without a cause”; which is a manifest absurdity. No sane person gets angry without what he deems to be a cause. What Jesus said was that whoever was angry with his brother under any circumstances is in danger.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

When to Pray

You got to pray if you want to make it today.

~ Hammer ~

My friend Tami, a guidance counselor in a Los Angeles elementary school, conducted a staff meeting to determine how to help a five-year-old girl. At the age of four, Janet had watched her father commit suicide and was then sent to live in her aunt’s home, where she was abused by her uncle. The little girl, emotionally traumatized, became aphasic and registered an I.Q. bordering on mentally handicapped. After Janet left the meeting room, the staff sat in stunned silence; they all felt the deep pain this child had undergone at a tender age. As the teachers rose to leave, Tami called them back, inviting them, “Let’s pray.” The group held hands, and each person, in their own way, asked God to take care of this child. As human beings, they had hit a dead end, and they acknowledged that they needed help from a higher power.

Perhaps it is time we started to pray again in schools—and homes and offices and hospitals and government buildings and everywhere. I am not referring to rote prayer in which we parrot meaningless verse; I am talking about real prayer that emanates from the hearts of sincere human beings to the heart of a receptive God.

Prayer is our greatest power, for it connects us with the power of the entire universe, which is love. Often we leave prayer until the last resort, while it will help us just as readily if we use it as our first response to fear. Pray for your peace and that of others. God will answer.

Be with me today, and help me remember that You are the source of true healing.

God is my best friend and my fountain of strength.