Self Care

[caressa]

You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning

If I am to be remembered, I hope it is for the honesty I try to demonstrate, the patience I try to live by, and the compassion I feel for others.
—JoAnn Reed

So much of my truth, was founded on old tapes and I lived my life as a lie. Today on Dr. Oz they were talking about caretakers who are so busy taking care of others, they don't have time to give to themselves.

My sponsor told me it was okay to be a caretaker as long as I took care of me and only gave away the overflow. If I don't top myself up, and fill up with mental, emotional, and spiritual food as well as the physical, I end up giving only half truths, and try to do so many things that I seldom have the time to do each task well. Do I delegate? Am I open to sharing and receiving. Am I willing to ask for help or do I insist on doing it all m way?

When I don't have the time to do a good job, I am often working on fumes and get burnt out and my health is in jeopardy. What I give to others I must take time to do for myself. I need to be honest with myself. When I do something, is it only a half-hearted attempt. Do I give my all, or is my attention directed elsewhere and not totally in the moment? Am I cheating myself and others of my true self or just the person that I want them to see? The great I am, aren't I wonderful, look what I do for others, aren't I important? I am doing things for a worthy cause, but what is my motive and intent? This is something I need to ask myself and give an honest answer.

Am I still in the selfish, self-centered personna of my disease or am I coming from a full heart that is overflowing with love and compassion.

Attachments:

[SunnyGirl]

Well said Caressa, excellent share.....

My philosophy is:

• 25% of people I meet are not going to like me at all, ever
  
• 25% of people I meet are going to love me right away
  
• 25% of people I meet will dislike me at first and warm up later
  
• 25% of people I meet will like me at first and then not like me
  at all and that’s just fine.

Taking care of me and my needs is my #1 priority.
I can't help anyone else if I'm not OK with me....
I am a compassionate person, I try to reach out to others
but I can't fix them! Just for to day, I want to be happy
and seeing those around me with smiles, just about makes
my day..... ;D

Peace on the journey, SunnyGirl

[Lin]

There's a great analogy abotu this that I find helpful

When you are on an airplane the warnign says if the oxygen mask drops out of the ceiling, put it on YOURSELF BEFORE you put it on your child. You will be no help to your child if YOU are unable to breathe.

We do have to take care of oursleves before we can help others. I am also a caretaker, but these days, I make SURE my own needs are met adn THEn and only THen, can i help others.

LIN

[majestyjo]

Was watching The Talk today and they were discussing about getting money and helping others or keep the money all for their own needs.

We can get caught up in how hard done by we are, and yet when we look around us, there are so many people, much worse off than we are. I may not have much, but I know I live in luxury compared to a lot of people in this world. Yet I could make a long list of what I don't have, and a lot of things, many people take for granted and think of them as essentials (i.e. cell phone and credit card), but when I focus on what I do have and look at where I was, and what I have in today, I am truly blessed. Just because I don't have a dish washer doesn't mean I am hard done by, for one thing, I don't think I am allowed one in my apartment. I hate doing dishes, I have always hated doing dishes, and I don't think having a dishwasher is going to change that. I think the only way it would change would be to have a 2 legged one.

I need to take care of my needs, top myself up and only give away the over flow. My sponsor told me that early in recovery and I never forgot and it is still true in today, almost 24 years later. It is still one day at a time program. My favourite slogan, "Let it begin with me." I can't give away what I don't have.