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Post by Lin on May 28, 2011 7:10:41 GMT -5
The night before my very first Alanon meeting...almsot 20 years ago, we were at a rehab checking hubby in. A nurse was interviewing us in separate rooms. She looked me inthe eye and told me I had WAY too much anger and needed to get to an alanon meeting ASAP. I went the next night and the rest is history. Today I dont have all of that anger toward the alkie or his actions. I have much more self-control when it comes to that. I do get angry from time to time, but not over the addiction. Detachment and acceptance have helped me move past that.
LIN
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Post by SunnyGirl on May 28, 2011 12:36:12 GMT -5
Anger -or- Self-control
"Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful
to us than the injury that provokes it." — Seneca.
If I can't control my anger my life become total mess.... I still
get angry now and then but I make a big effort to head it off
before chaos sets in. Anger is hurtful to those we aim it at
and but it hurts us even more in the long run.
I'm a lot quicker to apologize for getting judgmental, especially
with my children. My opinions are just that, mine, they are adults
and don't need to listen me prattle on and on about what they
shoulda-coulda-woulda done......
An apology only goes so far, making amends are about a
genuine change in my behavior instead of the patchwork of
an apology. We take on a whole new way of life...... I'm
not perfect and never will be, but I have to be willing to make
the effort to become a better person and I do this ODAT!
Peace on the journey, SG
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Post by caressa on May 28, 2011 15:49:28 GMT -5
It is okay to be angry, but as they say, even justifiable anger can be dangerous. It is what I do with it that makes the difference today.
I no longer stuff it. I no longer pull hissy fits. I have learned to hesitate and meditate before I speak.
I have learned to allow other people their opinions. I have learned to accept where they are coming from, even though I don't like it. The same thing with myself. Accepting what is in the moment, knowing it is subject to change as long as I remain honest, open minded and willing.
A lot of it for me is recognizing it for what it was. It was just another feeling that I stuffed. Today, I can verbalize it in a healthy way. I can share my feelings with my sponsor, friends, and with others who I feel safe with. The biggest things is turning it over to my Higher Power. It is about letting go of it in healthy ways. i.e. going for a walk, pounding a pillow, journaling, and verbalization.
Like other feeling, this too shall pass, especially if I don't feed it!
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Post by caressa222 on Jun 6, 2020 4:17:05 GMT -5
Have had a lot of anger lately. I try not to act out. I really need to watch comes out of my mouth. My God and I are workings on it. The only way I have control is through my God.
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. I will be back looking for Lin and others.