Fears

[caressa]

Fears sometimes still lingers in my mind. I can be okay when that happens. I can feel them through and talk about them and go on in spite of them, not letting myself picture the worst, but seeing the results in a positive light.

- Time For Joy

This is a nice affirmation. Sometimes I get in the mind frame, if I have fear I don't have faith. Yet in reality, I have faith because I can work through the fear and come out the other side.

I had a friend share with me that he always imagined the worst case scenario and then when things turned out much better I was disappointed and let down. I thought what a negative way of looking at life. What we put out we get back, so if I only think the worst, most time, unless God's Grace is working over time, I am going to get back what I put out.

It is like putting a condition on God. I will ask you for help but I will figure this out and if you say no, then I won't feel let down. What happened to let go and let God. We plan but don't plan the outcome. We turn it over and let go, mind you not alway easy, much easier said than don and takes practice, practice, practice.

In recovery, on my spiritual journey I found that I often limited God by my narrow outlook and closed mind. I had to open it up, be open to all things and look for the message not the messenger. My God uses people, places and things to show me a better way of living.

I don't have to live in those old patterns and behaviors. I can make new tapes.

Attachments:

[SunnyGirl]

False
Emotions
Appearing
Real

When I was a child my Mom would take us girls
to Sunday School and drop us off. I remember
the name of one of my teachers, her name was
Mrs. Mathis. On the wall she put the following
bible quote....

“But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you.”

It's from one of the Psalms, not sure which... I've
used this quote for more years than I can count.
When I'd wake up during a nightmare and one time
as a teen I was swimming in the ocean and the
tide was pulling me out, I started to panic and
again I thought of the quote. I could almost feel
God's arms around me, pulling me towards the
shore. Again when I was on my knee's in prayer
as my Son lay in a coma, I prayed for God's healing
hands to touch my Son and once again I felt a sense
of peace come over me...

When you are facing your fear, whatever it is, God is
asking you to hold on to Him. He in turn will hold on to
you, and nothing will ever come between you......
Or in recovery, "If God leads to to it, He will get me
through it"! God knows all, He knows about me, and
if God is everywhere, He's wherever I am, so today I
have no fears!

Peace on the journey, SunnyGirl

[caressa]

Fears are real to me. The difference in today is that I know and have the faith that my God will see me through them.

There are unknown one and justifiable ones, and yet I know it isn't healthy to focus on them. What occupies our mind is drawn to us. If I think of it long enough, it is sure to hear my voice.
Having said that, when I fill my mind with positive thoughts, there isn't too much space left over for negative ones.

I know that I a human enough to have positive and negative in my life. The difference in today, in recovery, is that I allow for that human factor. Prior to recovery, it wasn't an option or it was an excuse. That I should be normal, "Heaven forbid" and to be less than was never an option, it had to be perfect or not at all. A lot of my fears were those of not measuring up, not being accepted, no doing the best, not having approval, etc. Again, I am reminded that perfectionism like isolation is part of my disease. Isolation blocks me from the Spirit of God. My God works through people, places and things, and when there is just me alone with me, then the thing I fear the most is myself.

Always thought it was fear of other people, places and/or things, when in fact I used people, places and things to make me feel better. The difference in recovery, is my God utilizes people, places and things to show me a better way of living.