Post by caressa on Jul 24, 2011 11:43:08 GMT -5
A relationship to me is what I have to do after we've had sex rather than say: 'You know this was just a sexual thing, I don't want to get involved.' I'd rather drag it out for four or five years.
- Charlie C. (from Alkiespeaks)
When I read this, it cracked me up. I never lasted years, mine were generally months. If they didn't break up with me, then I sabatoged the relationship with the hope that they would get tired of me because they were getting to close and I just didn't do committment or intimacy well.
Even though I didn't want the closeness, I felt like I needed a man in my life. It didn't look right if I didn't. I used them, often with the thought, if they are going to use me, I'll do it onto them what they are doing or going to do to me. Pretty screwed up thinking not to mention sick.
I felt that I needed that person in my life because it was through them that I got my validation and affirmation. In truth, how can they do this when they don't really know me.
Two needy people do not make for a healthy relationship. For me in today, people are in my life because I want them there, not because I need them there. We need to be whole and complete within ourselves, not looking outside of ourselves to make ourselves feel better. Looking to someone else, including the bottle, to supply the false sense of courage, comfort, and love.
They say don't get into a relationship the first year of recovery. Build a relationship with yourself and with your Higher Power and then you are more qualified to have a healthy relationship.
- Charlie C. (from Alkiespeaks)
When I read this, it cracked me up. I never lasted years, mine were generally months. If they didn't break up with me, then I sabatoged the relationship with the hope that they would get tired of me because they were getting to close and I just didn't do committment or intimacy well.
Even though I didn't want the closeness, I felt like I needed a man in my life. It didn't look right if I didn't. I used them, often with the thought, if they are going to use me, I'll do it onto them what they are doing or going to do to me. Pretty screwed up thinking not to mention sick.
I felt that I needed that person in my life because it was through them that I got my validation and affirmation. In truth, how can they do this when they don't really know me.
Two needy people do not make for a healthy relationship. For me in today, people are in my life because I want them there, not because I need them there. We need to be whole and complete within ourselves, not looking outside of ourselves to make ourselves feel better. Looking to someone else, including the bottle, to supply the false sense of courage, comfort, and love.
They say don't get into a relationship the first year of recovery. Build a relationship with yourself and with your Higher Power and then you are more qualified to have a healthy relationship.
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.