Recovery

[caressa]

Wasn't sure where to post this. I posted the reading a few days ago and forgot to get back to it.

It talks about codependency, but what stuck out for me was the blaming of others for our problems.

For so many years it was my parents fault, my husband's actions, my son's disrespect and how he ignored my boundries. If they would only do what "I" told them to do everything would be OK!

As it says in the reading, it is best to point the finger at me instead of pointing it at others. It is a program of reflection. It does take one to know one. What we see in others, we have within ourselves in order to recognize it.

Recovery is about me and what I am doing with my life in today. It isn't about what happened in the past, but how I have moved beyond that and making a life for myself in today.

Just becaue it happened in the past doesn't mean it has to happen in today, especially when I remember to take my Higher Power with me. When I surrender each day, each event, each incident over to my Higher Power, I am empowered to do what I need to do for myself in today.

When I project into the future, all I have is the past to base my thoughts on. When I stay in today, live in today, the tomorrows will unfold as they are meant to be. Not always as I would like sometimes, but when I stay connected to my Higher Power, have faith in Him, I don't have to walk in fear.

[majestyjo]

Not sure what reading I was talking about, perhaps it was deleted.

When ever I see the word codependent, I think of Melody Beatties's book "Codependent No More." I read the preface and ran to the nearest Al-Anon meeting.

I was fortunate enough to find her book "Beyond Codependency" too, although I haven't seen either one at Cole's or the library recently.

The saying, "Without you, there is no me," is such a codepenent phrase and so unhealthy. Two needy people looking for the other to fulfill them, makes for a very unhealthy relationship. Each person needs to be complete and whole within themselves. Someone should be in your life because you want them there, not because you need them there.