Post by Caressa2 on May 23, 2004 13:20:42 GMT -5
"We want to be free of our guilt, but we don't wish to do so at the expense of anyone else."
Basic Text, p. 39
Let's face it: Most of us left trails of destruction in our wakes and harmed anyone who got in our way. Some of the people we hurt most in our addiction were the people we loved most. In an effort to purge ourselves of the guilt we feel for what we've done, we may be tempted to share with our loved ones, in gruesome detail, things that are better left unsaid. Such disclosures could do much harm and may do little good.
The Nineth Step is not about easing our guilty consciences; it's about taking responsibility for the wrongs we've done. In working our Eight and Ninth Steps, we should seek the guidance of our sponsor and amend our wrongs in a manner that won't cause us to owe more amends. We are not just seeking freedom from remorse-we are seeking freedom from our defects. We never again want to inflict harm on our loved ones. One way to insure that we do not is by working the Ninth Step responsibly, checking our motives, and discussing with our sponsor the particular amends we plan to make before we make them.
Just for today: I wish to accept responsibility for my actions. Before making any amends, I will talk with my sponsor.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY:
I was told that amend meant change not "I'm sorry!" Sorry had long ago lost any meaning in my life, so it had to have a positive intent and motive behind the word. i.e. Thanks to my Higher Power I have had healing and that defect has been removed or I have come to see where I was wrong and I will try to the best of my ability to learn from my mistakes and not do it again.
Basic Text, p. 39
Let's face it: Most of us left trails of destruction in our wakes and harmed anyone who got in our way. Some of the people we hurt most in our addiction were the people we loved most. In an effort to purge ourselves of the guilt we feel for what we've done, we may be tempted to share with our loved ones, in gruesome detail, things that are better left unsaid. Such disclosures could do much harm and may do little good.
The Nineth Step is not about easing our guilty consciences; it's about taking responsibility for the wrongs we've done. In working our Eight and Ninth Steps, we should seek the guidance of our sponsor and amend our wrongs in a manner that won't cause us to owe more amends. We are not just seeking freedom from remorse-we are seeking freedom from our defects. We never again want to inflict harm on our loved ones. One way to insure that we do not is by working the Ninth Step responsibly, checking our motives, and discussing with our sponsor the particular amends we plan to make before we make them.
Just for today: I wish to accept responsibility for my actions. Before making any amends, I will talk with my sponsor.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY:
I was told that amend meant change not "I'm sorry!" Sorry had long ago lost any meaning in my life, so it had to have a positive intent and motive behind the word. i.e. Thanks to my Higher Power I have had healing and that defect has been removed or I have come to see where I was wrong and I will try to the best of my ability to learn from my mistakes and not do it again.
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.