Just For Today

[majestyjo]

Just for today, I choose not to use.  For many years, I used people, places and things.  In today, my God puts people, places, and things in my path to show me a new way of life.

The first reading at this link is the Just for Today link is for NA, but the others are all food for the soul and applied to all aspects of my dis-ease.  I learned to identify and not compare.

I had one reason to go NA, for identification, I knew I was an addict.  I went to AA for my denial.  I went to Al-Anon to heal my childhood hurts and identify some of the origins of my old tapes and fears.  I found that I had 3-33 reasons to go to Al-Anon, I was the daughter of an alcoholic, a daughter of a food addict, married to an alcoholic, married to a sex addict, had a son who was a self-admitted alcoholic/addict, and I have an eating disorder and qualified on inspection, as a busy/workaholic and a gambler.   I later added my computer and my computer game Bejewelled3.

The substance is but a symptom of my disease, the problem is me.


www.justfortodaymeditations.com/

[majestyjo]

Like today's reading. Had a boyfriend who thought he could ride on my shirt tails and stay sober. When I set boundaries, detached from his issues, he found himself another girlfriend to cater to his needs, and he relapsed.

Set boundaries with another, blamed me for his anger issues he didn't deal with and he relapsed after 7 years in recovery, because he chose to work a religious program instead of working the 12 Steps to deal with his issues and the last words I heard from him were, "Look at what you made me do." I don't have the power. I am powerless over other people's disease and choices. I am powerless and it is only through this program, that I am empowered, to stay clean and sober in today by surrendering to it each day.

I don't have to be a leech and try to suck the power out of someone else. It is a God (of our understanding) Gift, offered to each and every one of us.

www.justfortodaymeditations.com/

Attachments:

[Lin]

"I don't have the power". I use that line often. Mostly it is when I would want to blame myself if he relapsed or if he made poor choices about things. The three Cs remind me i don't have the power.I didn't cause it, I can't control it and I can't cure it,.

LIN

[majestyjo]

Just For Today
May 27
Meeting The Day’s Challenge

“…the decision to ask for God’s help is our greatest source of strength and courage.” Basic Text, p. 26

A challenge is anything that dares us to succeed. Things new and unfamiliar serve as challenges, whether those things appear good or bad to us. We are challenged by obstacles and opposition from within ourselves and from without. New and difficult things, obstacles and opposition, all are a part of “life on life’s terms” Living clean means learning to meet challenge.

Many of us, consciously or unconsciously, took drugs to avoid meeting challenge. Many of us were equally afraid of failure and success. Each time we declined the day’s challenge, we suffered a loss of self-esteem. Some of us used drugs to mask the shame we felt. Each time we did that, we became even less able to meet our challenges and more likely to use.

By working the NA program, we’ve found the tools we need to successfully meet any challenge. We’ve come to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, a Power that cares for our will and our lives. We’ve asked that Power to remove our character defects, those things that made our lives unmanageable. We’ve taken action to improve our conscious contact with that Higher Power. Through the steps, we’ve been given the ability to stop using drugs and start living.

Each day, we are faced with new challenges. And each day, through working our program of recovery, we are given the grace to meet those challenges.

Just for today: I will ask my Higher Power to help me squarely meet today’s challenge.

If it wasn't for my Higher Power, I would not have made it through today. I am reading this after the fact, and it is nice to read it and have your day affirmed.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today
May 30
Loneliness vs. Being Alone

“Sharing with others keeps us from feeling isolated and alone.”
Basic Text, p. 81

There is a difference between being alone and being lonely. Being lonely is a state of the heart, an emptiness that makes us feel sad and sometimes hopeless. Loneliness is not always alleviated when we enter into relationships or surround ourselves with others. Some of us are lonely even in a room full of people.

Many of us came to Narcotics Anonymous out of the desperate loneliness of our addiction. After coming to meetings, we begin to make new friends, and often our feelings of loneliness ease. But many of us must contend with loneliness throughout our recovery.

What is the cure for loneliness? The best cure is to begin a relationship with a Higher Power that can help fill the emptiness of our heart. We find that when we have a belief in a Higher Power, we never have to feel lonely. We can be alone more comfortably when we have a conscious contact with a God of our understanding.

We often find deep fulfillment in our interactions with others as we progress in our recovery. Yet we also find that, the closer we draw to our Higher Power, the less we need to surround ourselves with others. We begin to find a spirit within us that is our constant companion as we continue to explore and deepen our connection with a Power greater than ourselves. We realize we are spiritually connected with something bigger than we are.

Just for today: I will take comfort in my conscious contact with a Higher Power. I am never alone.

We are never alone. It is up to be to reach out or take time to go within.

[majestyjo]

Just For today
June 14
Maintaining Our Faith

“If we maintain our spiritual condition daily, we find it easier to deal with the pain and confusion.”
Basic Text, p. 92

When we first began searching for a Power greater than ourselves, many of us got stuck in old beliefs or ideas. These ranged from the fear of a punishing or vengeful God to no belief at all. Some of us felt we had done such terrible things that a loving Power would never have anything to do with us. Others were convinced that the “bad” things that happened to us would not have occurred if a loving Power had actually existed. It took time, effort, open-mindedness, and faith to acquire a working belief in a loving Higher Power that would guide us through life’s challenges.

Even after we come to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, our old ideas can come back to haunt us. Major setbacks in our lives and the insecurity such events can trigger may give rise to the return of our old, inadequate ideas about God. When this happens, we need to assure ourselves that our Higher Power has not abandoned us but is waiting to help us make it through the hard times in our recovery. No matter how painful our loss may be, we will survive our setback and continue to grow if we maintain the faith our program has given us.

Just for today: I have worked hard to build my faith in a loving, caring Higher Power that will guide me through life’s challenges. Today, I will trust that Power.

Faith in my God has allowed me to work through the fear I felt when I was told about my health issues.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today

June 20

Meditation For Beginners

“For some, prayer is asking for God’s help; meditation is listening for God’s answer. Quieting the mind through meditation brings an inner peace that brings us into contact with the God within us.”

Basic Text, pp.44-45

"Be patient when you’re learning to meditate,” many of us were told. “It takes practice to know what to ‘listen’ for.”

We’re glad someone told us that, or many of us would have quit after a week or two of meditating. For the first few weeks, we may have sat each morning, stilled our thoughts, and “listened”, just as the Basic Text said-but “heard” nothing. It may have taken a few more weeks before anything really happened. Even then, what happened was often barely noticeable. We were rising from our morning meditations feeling just a little better about our lives, a little more empathy for those we encountered during the day, and a little more in touch with our Higher Power.

For most of us, there was nothing dramatic in that awareness – no bolts of lightning or claps of thunder. Instead, it was something quietly powerful. We were taking time to get our egos and our ideas out of the way. In that clear space, we were improving our conscious contact with the source of our daily recovery, the God of our understanding. Meditation was new, and it took time and practice. But, like all the steps, it worked – when we worked it.

Just for today: I will practice “listening” for knowledge of God’s will for me, even if I don’t know what to “listen” for yet.

Nice to get affirmation. I was talking to the owner of the Holistic Center and his assistant today on my way home from the doctor's.

We talked about this thing, taking time to listen after have put in a prayer request. We pray and then often go running off not waiting for the answer to catch up to us, and we keep praying and praying, when in fact, the answer has already been given. We either ignore it because we don't like the answer, we don't hear because we didn't listen, or our internal chatter is so loud, we can't hear our Higher Power's reply. Prayer is asking, meditation is listening for the answers. We don't need to put our life on hold waiting for God. He is on a different time table.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today

July 14

An “Inside Job”



“Social acceptability does not equal recovery.”

Basic Text, p.21



One of the first things that happens to many of us in recovery is that we start to look better. We get healthier; we bathe; we dress more appropriately. And without the goading of active addiction, many of us finally stop stealing, lying, and hustling. We start to look normal – just by removing the drugs.



Looking normal is very different than being normal. Acceptability in the eyes of the world is a benefit of recovery; it is not the same thing as recovery. We can enjoy the benefits of recovery, but we must take care to nurture their true source. Lasting recovery isn’t found in acceptance from others, but in the inner growth set in motion by the Twelve Steps.



Just for today: I know that looking good isn’t enough. Lasting recovery is an inside job.

I had to learn to go within instead of looking for something outside of myself to make me feel better.  I was told that I need to heal from the inside out.  A scar may heal on the surface, but it take a long time for it to heal internally.  The roots run deep and I found them to be often connected to a lot of issues, past and present.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today

July 18

The Gift Of Desperation

“Our disease always resurfaced or continued to progress until, in desperation, we sought help from each other in Narcotics Anonymous.”

Basic Text, p. 13

When we think of being desperate, we envision an undesirable state: a poor, bedraggled soul frantically clawing at something sorely needed, a desperate look in the eyes. We think of hunted animals, hungry children, and of ourselves before we found NA.

Yet it was the desperation we felt before coming to NA that compelled us to accept the First Step. We were fresh out of ideas, and so became open to new ones. Our insanity had finally risen higher than our wall of denial, forcing us to get honest about our disease. Our best efforts at control had only worn us out; hence, we became willing to surrender. We had received the gift of desperation and, as a result, were able to accept the spiritual principles that make it possible for us to recover.

Desperation is what finally drives many of us to ask for help. Once we’ve reached this state, we can turn around and start anew. Just as the desperate, hunted animal seeks a safe haven, so do we: in Narcotics Anonymous.

Just for today: The gift of desperation has helped me become honest, open-minded, and willing. I am grateful for this gift because it has made my recovery possible.

A good reading, which reminds me of how I felt when I came into recovery.  I was sick and tired of being tired and sick.   I still get that feeling, but I don't have to pick up and use as a result of my feelings thanks to the program.

Attachments:

[majestyjo]

Just For Today

July 27

We Do Recover

“After coming to NA, we found ourselves among a very special group of people who have suffered like us and found recovery. In their experiences, freely shared, we found hope for ourselves. If the program worked for them, it would work for us.”

Basic Text, p.10

A newcomer walks into his or her first meeting, shaking and confused. People are milling about. Refreshments and literature are set out. The meeting starts after everyone has drifted over to their chairs and settled themselves in. After taking a bewildered glance at the odd assortment of folks in the room, the newcomer asks, “Why should I bet my life on this group? After all, they’re just a bunch of addicts like me.”

Though it may be true that not many of our members had much going for us when we got here, the newcomer soon learns that the way we are living today is what counts. Our meetings are filled with addicts whose lives have turned completely around. Against all odds, we are recovering. The newcomer can relate to where we’ve been and draw hope from where we are now. Today, every one of us has the opportunity to recover.

Yes, we can safely entrust our lives to our Higher Power and to Narcotics Anonymous. So long as we work the program, the payoff is certain: freedom from active addiction and a better way of life.

Just for today: The recovery I’ve found in Narcotics Anonymous is a sure thing. By basing my life on it, I know I will grow.

We do recover from that hopeless state that we feel when we come into the doors of recovery.  I know I was sick and tired of being tired and sick.  That is how I have been feeling lately, and when I feel that way, I know I need to get back to basics.  It is still, "Just for today, I choose not to use."  I surrender to win.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today
August 1
Freedom From Guilt

“Our addiction enslaved us. We were prisoners of our own mind and were condemned by our own guilt.”
Basic Text, p.7

Guilt is one of the most commonly encountered stumbling blocks in recovery. One of the more notorious forms of guilt is the self-loathing that results when we try to forgive ourselves but don’t feel forgiven.

How can we forgive ourselves so we feel it? First, we remember that guilt and failure are not links in an unbreakable chain. Honestly sharing with a sponsor and with other addicts shows this to be true. Often the result of such sharing is a more sensible awareness of the part we ourselves have played in our affairs. Sometimes we realize that our expectations have been too high. We increase our willingness to participate in the solutions rather than dwelling on the problems.

Somewhere along the way, we discover who we really are. We usually find that we are neither the totally perfect nor the totally imperfect beings we have imagined ourselves to be. We need not live up to or down to our illusions; we need only live in reality.

Just for today: I am grateful for I disagreeets and accept my liabilities. Through willingness and humility, I am freed to progress in my recovery and achieve freedom from guilt.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today August 10

Regular Prayer And Meditation

“Most of us pray when we are hurting. We learn that if we pray regularly, we won’t be hurting as often or as intensely.” Basic Text, p.44

Regular prayer and meditation are two more key elements in our new pattern of living. Our active addiction was more than just a bad habit waiting to be broken by force of will. Our addiction was a negative, draining dependence that stole all our positive energy. That dependence was so total, it prevented us from developing any kind of reliance on a Higher Power.

From the very beginning of our recovery, our Higher Power has been the force that’s brought us freedom. First, it relieved us of our compulsion to keep taking drugs, even when we knew they were killing us. Then, it gave us freedom from the more deeply ingrained aspects of our disease. Our Higher Power gave us the direction, the strength, and the courage to inventory ourselves; to admit out loud to another person what our lives had been like, perhaps for the first time; to begin seeking release from the chronic defects of character underlying our troubles; and, at last, to make amends for the wrongs we’d done.

That first contact with a Higher Power, and that first freedom, has grown into a life full of freedom. We maintain that freedom by maintaining and improving our conscious contact with our Higher Power through regular prayer and meditation.

Just for today: I will make a commitment to include regular prayer and meditation in my new pattern of living.

Without it I wouldn't have stayed clean and sober.

[majestyjo]

Just For Today

August 18

How Long Do I Have To Go?

“The way to remain a productive, responsible member of society is to put our recovery first.”

Basic Text, p. 102

The meetings have been great! Each night we’ve attended, we’ve gathered with other addicts to share experience, strength, and hope. And each day, we’ve used what we’ve learned in the meetings to continue in our recovery.

Meanwhile, life goes on. Work, family, friends, school, sport, entertainment, community activities, civic obligations-all call out for our time. The demands of everyday living sometimes make us ask ourselves, “How long do I have to go to these meetings?”

Let’s think about this. Before coming to Narcotics Anonymous, could we stay clean on our own? What makes us think we can now? Then there’s the disease itself to consider – the chronic self-centeredness, the obsessiveness, the compulsive behavior patterns that express themselves in so many areas of our lives. Can we live and enjoy life without effective treatment for our disease? No.

“Ordinary” people may not have to worry about such things, but we’re not “0rdinary” people – we’re addicts. We can’t pretend we don’t have a fatal, progressive illness, because we do. Without our program, we may not survive to worry about the demands of work, school, family, or anything else. NA meetings give us the support and direction we need to recover from our addiction, allowing us to live the fullest lives possible.

Just for today: I want to live and enjoy life. To do that, I will put my recovery first.

As someone once said, "I have to live with me." This is a living program, just for today, I choose not to use.