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Post by majestyjo on Sept 9, 2016 6:28:59 GMT -5
Insecurities can block us from a fruitful journey. We live in fear and don't allow ourselves the luxury of taking the next step into the unknown. I must never forget that I have a Higher Power who will go with me if I don't forget and leave Him/Her at home.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 13, 2016 16:17:00 GMT -5
'All I really need to know (to survive the holidays) I learned at a Twelve Step group'
In the mid-1980s, an essay by Robert Fulghum titled "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten" became immensely popular. In it, Fulghum suggests that the world would be a better place if adults still adhered to the lessons they learned as children, like playing fair and sharing.
A Twelve Step group is like kindergarten for recovering people--a safe place where they learn basic life truths and rules that help keep them sane and sober. Much of this wisdom comes in the form of slogans or sayings that can resonate far beyond the walls of a recovery group meeting. Like Fulghum's list of lessons, Twelve Step teachings can serve as practical reminders to all of us about how to be and act in the world.
Some Twelve Step insights can be particularly useful as we approach this holiday season--a time often fraught with stress, family tensions, and unmet expectations. For example, slogans like "Easy does it," "Keep it simple sweetheart (KISS)," "Practice an attitude of gratitude," and alliterations like the "Seven Ts: Take time to think the thing through," remind us to slow down, pare down, and pause before we hurry about, driving ourselves (and no doubt those around us) crazy. Instead of getting caught up in the commercialized version of the holidays, try to recapture the meaning and magic of the season. Make a gift. Better yet, be a gift by doing something special for someone. Sing. Dance. Hug. Visit an elderly person. Write letters telling loved ones what you value most about them.
Twelve Step participants are often told, "When you're home by yourself, you're behind enemy lines," or "If you share your pain you cut it in half, if you don't you double it." Others may say, "My head is like a bad neighborhood and I shouldn't go in there alone." They realize the importance of having a healthy and honest support system--especially during the holidays. They know to develop strategies for situations that might jeopardize their recovery. Food addicts might eat a healthy meal before going to a holiday party. Alcoholics might ask an AA buddy to accompany them to a place where liquor will be served. Others may opt out of going to a stressful gathering with a dysfunctional family and choose instead to go to a Twelve Step meeting.
Recovering folks are also cautious about making New Year's resolutions because they can be recipes for disappointment. As one recovering person put it, "For me, resolutions are about willpower, but AA has shown me that I can't control everything. Resolutions set you up for ?if only' thinking. You will yourself to lose weight, for example, thinking that if you do, you will be happy. But I've already spent too many years trying to meet impossible standards of what I thought I was expected to be instead of celebrating and building on who I am."
When we learn not to obsess about a goal but instead celebrate the journey, we can better embrace the Twelve Step philosophy of "progress, not perfection." We recognize that we are imperfect beings who move forward one day, one experience, and even one mistake at a time.
Twelve Steppers are sometimes reminded to "Take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth" or that "Anger is only one letter away from danger"--wise cautions for those of us who might have trouble holding our tongues at a holiday dinner when an irksome relative gets under our skin. Unsettling scenes can often be averted if we embrace another AA saying, "If you can't love everybody today, at least try not to hurt anybody."
Ultimately, happy holidays are about making healthy choices, a truism exemplified in a parable sometimes shared at Twelve Step meetings. A Native American grandfather told his grandchild, "Sometimes I feel as if I have two wolves fighting in my heart. One wolf is vengeful, angry, and violent. The other is loving and compassionate." When the grandchild asked which wolf would win the fight, the wise grandfather replied, "The one I feed."
Holidays can be laden with chaos, anxiety and anger, or they can be opportunities for authentic connections, spiritual reflection, and joy. Which wolf will you feed this holiday season? The choice is yours.
--Published December 11, 2006
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 13, 2016 16:19:47 GMT -5
If you want what we have...
From the Book
If You Want What We Have:
Sponsorship Meditations
By Joan Larkin
---- 1 ----
Whatever happens at all happens as it should.
Marcus Aurelius Antonius
New Comer
I came to this meeting, but I don’t know if I belong here. I just don’t know.
Sponsor
We have a saying: “Nobody gets here by mistake.” For many of us, this means that something inside us knows we need help and that we’re in the process of becoming willing to accept it. Some of us are drawn here thinking, at first, that we’ve come because of someone else’s problems; then we discover that we’ve also come for ourselves. Some of us sense immediately that we belong here; some come to this feeling over time; some never feel they belong. Our arriving at the first meeting can seem mysterious until we realize how unlikely it is for a person with no relationship to addiction whatsoever to show up here.
Since you can’t decide whether you belong her or not, why not stay? Consider it a gift that’s been offered you, a chance to explore your relationship to addiction. You are entitled to be here. The only “qualification” for membership is a desire to quit our addictive substance or behavior. Unless you cause a disruption, no one’s going to ask you to leave a meeting. Relax, sit back, and listen. See if you identify with any of the feelings that you hear people share, whether or not their specific life experiences mirror yours. If you keep coming, more will be revealed in time.
Today, I am where I’m supposed to be.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 13, 2016 16:20:17 GMT -5
If you want what we have...
From the Book
If You Want What We Have:
Sponsorship Meditations
By Joan Larkin
©1998 Joan Larkin
---- 2 ----
We know the truth, not only by the reason, but by the heart.
Blaise Pascla
Newcomer
I’m not sure I qualify to be in this program. I wasn’t that bad – I hear stories that are so much worse than mine.
Sponsor
There’s a joke about a group of friends standing at their drinking buddy’s graveside with his widow, all of them shaking their heads and saying, “I don’t understand it – he wasn’t that bad.”
Who qualifies for a Twelve Step program? The answer doesn’t lie simple in the quantities of a substance consumed or in the frequency of an unwanted behavior. More telling is whether or not we have a choice. It’s useful to make a list of times we remember using in spite of intention not to and a list of times when using took us places we never meant to go, made us do things we never meant to do. Perhaps we’ll recall many such situations, perhaps only a few. The number is less important that our willingness to look back at our memories, and the feelings accompanying them, without censoring ourselves. Something inside us brought us here; it’s up to each of us to take an honest look at what that was.
Today, I look honestly at times when I have been powerless over this addiction. I acknowledge the ways it has made my life unmanageable.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 13, 2016 16:21:05 GMT -5
From the Book
If You Want What We Have:
Sponsorship Meditations
By Joan Larkin
©1998 Joan Larkin
---- 3 ----
A man takes a drink, the drink takes another, and the drink takes the man.
Sinclair Lewis
Newcomer
I’ve heard Alcoholics Anonymous members say, “It’s the first drink that gets you drunk,” and Overeaters Anonymous members say, “Don’t take that first compulsive bite.” It seems a little extreme. Don’t Twelve Step programs allow for the possibility of doing things in moderation?
Sponsor
There are numerous stories of addicted people who started with the idea that they’d have “just one” of whatever it was. Hours, days, or weeks later, they were still in the middle of a binge. Most of us, when we were active in our addictions, promised ourselves repeatedly that we’d be moderate, though we’d already accumulated plenty of evidence that we lacked the desire and the capacity for moderation. One we started using, no matter how seemingly insignificant the beginning, we were under the control of our addiction. We experienced a craving that no quantity of a drug or repetition of and additive behavior could satisfy.
There are people on this planet who leave wine unfinished in their glasses and food uneaten on their plates. There are people who can do in moderation what people filling the seats at meetings couldn’t stop doing, once they started. But we are not those people. If we’ve suffered from an addiction enough to come here for treatment, why would we want to keep playing with denial?
Today, I’m strengthened by accepting my need to take special measures to protect my health and recovery.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 20, 2016 13:58:21 GMT -5
Today, I will go forward with love and gratitude, even if I don't feel like it.
When you step into love, you step out of fear. It's impossible to be in both at the same time. Try it. See for yourself.
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Today, I will let go of my fears about trusting myself. I am willing to make decisions, no matter what the outcome may be.
The past does not dictate the future. Be willing to make mistakes, and open to learning from them.
------------------------------------------------------
Received with thanks from Inspiration Plus
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 20, 2016 13:59:31 GMT -5
I is for Integrity, walk your talk.
Work hard at what you like to do and try to overcome all obstacles
Laugh at your mistakes and praise yourself for learning from them
Pick some flowers and appreciate the beauty of nature
Say hello to strangers and enjoy the people you know
Don't be afraid to show your emotions laughing and crying make you feel better
Love your friends and family with your entire being they are the most important part of your life
Feel the calmness on a quiet sunny day
Find a rainbow and live your world of dreams always remember life is better than it seems.
Author Unknown to me
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 5, 2016 16:51:24 GMT -5
I choose recovery for today. The day is a gift of the universe. --Kathleen Culver Newcomer I don't want to disappoint the people who count on me, but I'm afraid to promise that I'll stick to this recovery stuff forever. I don't know if I can do it. Frankly, I feel suffocated by the idea of never using anything ever again, of going to meetings for years--I can't imagine spending my whole life in recovery. Sponsor The span of a whole life is impossible to imagine. We have no idea how long we're going to live, what unforeseen things will take place in our lifetime, or even how a small choice we make today may in some way change the person we grow to be tomorrow. If I try to imagine doing anything "forever" or "for my whole life," I'm overwhelmed. Fortunately, no one here is asking me to promise that. The program suggests only that we get through one day--today--without using an addictive substance. Yesterday is over. Tomorrow is not here yet. My whole life is now, and now is all that need concern me. Sometimes even a twenty-four-hour period feels overwhelming, so I break it down into hours and go through the day an hour at a time. Some days I've even had to think in terms of just one minute at a time. Using substances we're addicted to comes naturally to us; a day in which we choose recovery instead is a highly successful day. I let go of yesterday and tomorrow. I choose recovery for today. --If You Want What We Have The ISMs of my disease, "I, Self, and Me." In order to recovery, I need to get out of self and help someone else. It is how I work and live my program, does someone look at me and see someone who is in recovery or someone still acting out in their disease.  |
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 17, 2016 16:59:44 GMT -5
I Was Chosen
I don’t deserve to be here today
I still can’t comprehend how I found my way
At times I was unable to fight
From a world of darkness to a world of light
Nevertheless, I had made it through
And I began to construct a life anew
Somehow a second chance I received
A new outlook upon life I now perceived
I have no clue why someone chose me
‘cause I wasn’t going to grow up to be
The savior to bring the world to peace
Leave that to one who knows what to do at least
I also won’t cure any disease
I don’t know how to put my stomach at ease
So someone, why me, may I question?
Why am I, an awful mess, your selection?
One of three places I should have been
For all of the misery I have given
Either locked up in a cold, damp cell
And the inmates, I would get to know quite well
Or have padded walls surrounding me
Then one of the crazy people I would be
Or I could make a major blunder
Place three for me should have been six feet under
The torture I’ve caused you must not know;
The destruction I caused many years ago
For their grief I am to blame
Through being a villain I had earned my fame
And I know their lives can never be
Restored to sanity, all because of me
So why I was chosen I don’t know
Despite the agony I caused years ago
I knew in my heart I could not win;
Tried to force myself into oblivion
But then I threw out one final prayer
Sobbing to anyone who just might be there
I don’t know what changed in me that day
Through that darkness I had discovered my way
Back then that wasn’t of my concern
Since a whole new life I was about to earn
I found some people of my own kind
Which I thought existed just in my own mind
For the first time I wasn’t alone
With these people I had found a comfort zone
Even though they were complete strangers
I was certain that they possessed no dangers
For they helped me to regain my life
To a world of new hope from a world of strife
I’m a walking miracle I keep hearing
Despair around me keeps on clearing
Scars of yesterday are history
While tomorrow’s life remains a mystery
Now I can see the light in my heart
Even when my hands can’t pull the darkness apart
The sun finally begins to shine
And this heavenly world can now be all mine
Someone out there wanted to save me
Restore my hectic life back to sanity
They must have seen something inside me
That something, must have established me worthy
I haven’t found that divine force yet
Whatever it is, I’m forever in debt
‘cause it somehow chose me to survive
Although I shouldn’t be, I am still alive
~*~*~Mandie~*~*~
~*~"I haven't found that divine force yet whatever it is, I'm forever in its debt. 'Cause somehow it chose ME to survive, although I shouldn't be, I'm still alive"~*~
I think this may be posted elsewhere on the board. Just read it and it spoke to me on another site, so wanted to share it with you. |
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 23, 2016 8:08:19 GMT -5
I need to let go of the great "I" am I. It is through my Higher Power that I am strengtened and directed and He is my Source today. It is "WE" can do what I can't do alone.
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Post by majestyjo on Apr 14, 2017 10:38:16 GMT -5
From yesterday's AA Thoughts. When I isolate, I am not only blocking myself off from the people in my life, I am also blocking myself off from my God.  |
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Post by majestyjo on Apr 28, 2017 22:35:35 GMT -5
I is for Isolation. Isolation is part of our disease, it is not a recovery tool. When we isolate, we isolate our soul and well as our body. We can do what I can''t do alone. We may be in a crowd but still feel alone.  |
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Post by majestyjo on Apr 29, 2017 20:31:12 GMT -5
I is for Integrity. Everytime I see this word, I think "Walk your talk." As mysponsor told me in early recovery, "Do people look at you and see recovery?" We learned about honesty and integrity - that the truth matters... that you don't take shortcuts or play by your own set of rules... and success doesn't count unless you earn it fair and square. Michelle Obama Be Impeccable With Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. Don Miguel Ruiz  |
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Post by majestyjo on May 11, 2017 12:12:26 GMT -5
I is for Ideals. When I was in a recovery house, we were asked to do a collage (spelling?) on how you thought you projected yourself to others., How you thought others saw you? How you wanted to look and be? How you felt before recovery? Everyone use to call me "mother" all of the time. I was the caretaker and people looked to me to fix things or tell them what to do, when I coiuldn't even look after myself.  |
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Post by majestyjo on May 11, 2017 12:13:17 GMT -5
I is for Inch. If you give your disease and inch, it will take a mile. We only have a daily reprieve. Don't let your disease take away from your day. Let go of the past and live in today. Inch your way, one day at a time, to a better way of life.  |
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Post by caressa222 on Feb 2, 2018 23:41:26 GMT -5
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Nothing happens by accident. There are no coincidences, they say, only God-incidences. I believe that God can do for me what I can't do for myself. I believe in God-incidences.  |
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 25, 2018 6:05:33 GMT -5
I is for Interest. I can take interest in spiritual things, or I can help others and make a deposit on my life insurance, and then later when need be, I can gather the dividends on the interest that has accrued. I can also go to meetings, they pay much bigger credits because you are helping you and others too.  |
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Post by majestyjo on Feb 25, 2018 6:07:34 GMT -5
I is for Internet. It can be a great recovery tool. It can bring us here to start our day with the Daily Readings. It can be a stumbling block because it is the pathway to social media and internet games that can stand between us and our God, when they become the focus of our life. There is nothing wrong with fun, but there is a lot to be said about obsessive, compulsive behaviour that needs to be turned over to our God. Anything that stands between me and who my God would have me be and do each day, becomes the god of the day.  |
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Post by majestyjo on May 3, 2018 0:34:25 GMT -5
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Post by caressa222 on May 6, 2020 22:49:13 GMT -5
I is for Insecurity. The Intuitive Healer I saw on a TV Show many years ago said that if you have problems with your feet and ankles, you are insecure.
Well I have neuropathy because of diabetes, also pseudo gout. Maybe it is justifiable anger, which isn't healthy.
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. I will be back looking for Lin and others.