Thursday-forgiving or resentful?

[Lin]

Before alanon I was very resentful. Now I have learned that only eats at me and does not good to anybody. So I have learned to be much more forgiving. I am ALSO one who wont let people walk on me...not sur that's resentful. Only example I ahve for that is a very old one. When his mom died she had very little to settle up. She had been living with his brother and sister in law. We went over to get a box of pictures and a few music boxes. Brother asked if there was anything Mike thought he might like. He saw a cookie jar that they used to bake cookies and fill when he was a kid. He said He would like to have her cookie jar. The sister in law stood up and said she would FIGHT him for that cookie jar. Brother said he could have it. We have it. But the very idea that something that small that meant alot to him would make her behave like that? Our will says she is to get nothing. Her husband gets a little Her daughter a little but she gets nothing. I am pleasant around her....so she wont know about that until the wills are read!Resentful? perhaps. Not completely forgiving either.

LIN

[majestyjo]

Thanks for sharing Lin. I think resentment is like all other feelings, it is what we do with them that makes the difference. I think it is important to validate a feeling, but most times they are not something that are good to hang onto.

That is why I like to AA suggestion of praying for the person or situation we resent for two weeks. They may not change but we do. I also think talking and perhaps journallying about the situation helps, it is not good to have the feelings stuffed inside of us. Once it is out, it is easier to let go. I found that I can forgive the person, but some acts are unforgiveable, especially if they hurt another.