Step by Step

[majestyjo]

December 21

Step by Step

“Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, Step Seven

Today, let me not be too eager to take the vital Seventh Step for, if I act prematurely, the defects I ask to be removed but am not truly willing to surrender may come back and bite me in the form of a slip or relapse. Step Seven is the culmination of the previous three Steps in which we first make our “searching and fearless moral inventory,” and then admit “the exact nature of our wrongs” to “God, to ourselves and to another human being.” But the Sixth Step may pack the most potent punch in that it requires us to be “entirely ready” to have the Higher Power of our understanding remove our shortcomings. If today is the one I decide to take the Seventh Step, grant that I be genuinely ready so that I may not later take back a defect that could be yet another downfall. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 22

Step by Step

Today, the uncertainty of the darkness of endless night eventually gives way to the certainty of daylight and, today, I begin to emerge from the darkness with the affirmation that I need and am worthy of something better. No more nightly binges into alcoholic oblivion that fuel the regrets, remorse and self-pity the morning after, and no more wallowing in anguish that is little more than my pathetic rationalization that I have to drink. My mistakes have been many and great, the pain I inflicted on others and myself deep and perhaps not able to be healed, and the lies too many and too great that, now, not even I can believe them. The darkness that masks the uncertainty of my nights has finally given way to daylight and, today, someone has thrown me the lifeline of AA. If I can go on blind faith alone that I am worthy, I can grab the lifeline. Today, I will. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 23

Step by Step

Today, if all things out-live their purpose, useful or not, today I begin to discard what serves no use to me anymore. Today I have no use for the emotional and spiritual damage that probably was bred long before my alcoholism and reinforced by alcoholism. They serve no useful purpose and never did, and it’s time to put an end to the damage they – and I – have done. Understanding that drinking for me is a choice and I alone am responsible to the consequences of that choice, those consequences have become so costly that I no longer want to be responsible to them. Because AA is here for the taking, it is my choice to grab it just as strongly as it is my choice to reject drinking and the cycle of abuse to myself and everyone around me. Today, enough is more than enough, and my choice is to go with sobriety. My first step: admitting I am powerless. And our common journey continues. Step by Step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 24

Step by Step

Today, Christmas Eve, I have no need, desire or excuse to take part of the holiday’s liquid cheer because I am here despite or in spite of it all, and my choice today is to retain or begin my sobriety. If I still have family and friends to be with this holiday season, I will not sabotage it by drinking even one gulp. If I am alone, it is because I have allowed it and shut out the support of meeting houses, others in recovery or those who need help getting there. Today is not a day for selfishness, and I will not empower it with self-pity, anger, mourning and regret if they are what my drinking spawned. Instead, I will be grateful that I simply am and have the potential to sober up, grow in it and, in some way, regain what I might have lost and keep what I haven’t. Today, I haven’t got time for the bittersweet of the season, only the promise of the sweet. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 25

Step by Step

“If a mere code of morals or a better philosophy of life were sufficient to overcome alcoholism, many of us would have recovered long ago. But we found that such codes and philosophies did not save us, no matter how much we tried. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the needed power wasn’t there. Our human resources, as marshaled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly.

“Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 4 (“We Agnostics”), pp 44-5.

Today, let me not blame my alcoholism on some moral failure on my part or a philosophy that did not apply to me and, instead, take it for what it is – a physical, emotional, and spiritual disease of my character. While I should not and cannot be blamed for becoming alcoholic, I can and should be responsible for my recovery. To this end, I must completely accept the First Step of absolute powerlessness over alcohol and, then, at least come to believe in something – a Power – greater and stronger than myself. But if I still grapple with this concept, perhaps my power can be my own experience of predictable behavior and outcomes, most of which carried increasingly heavier consequences. Today, I am an alcoholic not because of a moral or philosophical failure on my part, but because of a disease. It cannot be cured, but it can be arrested. The program’s first two steps are my beginning. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 26

Step by Step

“When I try to reconstruct what my life was ‘before,’ I see a coin with two faces.
“One, the side I turned to myself and the world, was respectable …

“The other side …was sinister, baffling. I was inwardly unhappy most of the time. There would be times when the life of respectability and achievement seemed insufferably dull – I had to break out. This I would do by going completely ‘bohemian’ for a night, getting drunk and rolling home with the dawn. Next day remorse would be on me like a tiger. I’d claw my way back to ‘respectability’ and stay there – until the inevitable next time.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Stopped in Time,” Ch 16 (“Me an Alcoholic?”), p 432.

Today, faith and security in recovery to know that there does not have to be “the inevitable next time.” AA encourages us to live in the solution of sobriety and not in the problem of alcoholism, and I am in the latter if my focus is on fighting off “the inevitable next time.” The threat of a “next time” is weakened if I practice with diligence and integrity the program’s steps and principles and accept intuitively that drinking now, for me, is a choice and that I will be held responsible to the consequences of that choice. Today, “the inevitable next time” may be less so if I stick to the program and the understanding that I have a choice and the choice I make will have consequences. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 27

Step by Step

Today, the first word in hopelessness is hope; the first word in helplessness is help; the first word in senselessness is sense; the first word in powerlessness is power. Within insanity is sanity; within fear, fearlessness; within pain, strength; within anger, reconciliation. This is our Program: from hopelessness to hope; from helplessness, help; from senselessness, sense; from powerlessness, power; from insanity, sanity; from fear, courage; from pain, strength; from anger, forgiveness. And from them – recovery. It’s that simple. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 28

Step by Step

Today, let me loosen my grip on my perspective that the program hammers what I cannot do and, instead, that it enables me with what I can do. While I cannot continue in futile endeavor to regain control over alcohol, I can control it by not feeding it. While I cannot continue to engage in conduct that injures myself and others, I can chart a 180-degree course change and start to give something nurturing instead of inflicting harm. And while I cannot always make direct amends for whatever reason, I can make indirect amends by working a program in which my sobriety is its own amend. AA is not a program of cannot; it is, instead, a program of can. Today the first word in can’t is can. And I can. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 29

Step by Step

Today, when resolutions for the coming new year are in vogue, I will make none because to do so skirts the program’s edict to take life one day at a time. Further, I have no guarantee that an entire year is promised me, and I cannot live for a day in the future because, in doing that, I am neglecting today. AA discourages us from living or looking too far ahead if today is sacrificed and encourages us to make our resolutions daily. Today, awakening to a new day, my resolution is to adhere to the steps and principles of the program and not drink and, further, to grow in the sobriety I seek. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 30

Step by Step

Today, I awaken with full memory of last night but, if not, the day that awaits offers a chance for another beginning. Grant me the wisdom and courage to seize the opportunity to continue or even begin to work toward something better, something I thirst and hunger for – sobriety, serenity, peace, calm, a worthy self-image, and a sense of gratitude that I am here even to be given yet another second chance. My best hope for what I seek is AA and its steps and principles and, today, may I finally decide that enough is enough of the alcoholic hangover and all the garbage that comes with it. But let me be disciplined enough, too, to understand that what sobriety and recovery offer comes with a price – to be of service to anyone who needs and wants what I seek. Today, I have yet another chance for another new beginning. Don’t let the lifeboat go by without me on board. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

December 31

Step by Step

Today, I need not fear anything for I have endured and survived the horror of active alcoholism and, by the grace of AA and a Higher Power to which it led me, I have emerged not only intact but a better person. I have kept the faith in the program, in its steps and principles, in the Power stronger than I, and I found faith in myself that I never had before. My gift has been sobriety the last 24 Hours. Having vested not only my heart and soul but my very life in this program, I faced few terrors other than those within myself but met them with the guidance of the steps. Now, nothing can compare and any fear from any source is something I know I can face responsibly, with faith and sobriety. Today, I have nothing to fear except the ghosts of my drinking past, and my program has strengthened me to move beyond them, to leave the fear behind. Yet I do not take for granted the gift of sobriety as something I am owed or even deserve; I have an obligation to it, and that obligation begins with sharing the message. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[caressa222]

January 1

Step by Step

“FOREWORD TO SECOND EDITION

Figures given in this foreword describe the Fellowship as it was in 1955
“Since the original Foreword to this book was written in 1939, a wholesale miracle has taken place. Our earliest printing voiced the hope ‘that every alcoholic who journeys will find the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous at his destination. Already,’ continues the early text, ‘twos and threes and fives of us have sprung up in other communities.’

“Sixteen years have elapsed between our first printing of this book and the presentation in 1955 of our second edition. In that brief space, Alcoholics Anonymous has mushroomed into nearly 6,000 groups whose membership is far above 150,000 recovered alcoholics.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Foreword to the Second Edition,” p xv.

Today, when tradition prods us to think in terms of new beginnings and resolutions, the history of AA as measured in the years between 1939 and 1955 assures us of a new start – if we work toward and apply the steps and principles of the program. In the years since this foreword, the number of recovering alcoholics has multiplied by more than 10 times. If the program has worked for that vast a number of people, why, then, can’t it work for me? It can, and if I have failed in the past, it is because I failed the program and not that the program failed me. On this day when we are encouraged to let go of the old and ring in the new, my recovery somehow appropriately begins with the hope that I, too, can be in that number of recovering alcoholics. So let the new begin. And our common journey continues. Step by step.– Chris M.

[majestyjo]

January 2

Step by Step

“I looked around me at people who seemed happy and tried to analyze their happiness, and it seemed to me that without exception these people had something or somebody they loved very much. I didn’t have the courage to love; I was not even sure I had the capacity. Fear of rejection and its ensuing pain were not to be risked, and I turned away from myself once more for the answer, this time to the drinks I had always refused before, and in alcohol I found a false courage.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Lost Nearly All,” Ch 12 (“Freedom From Bondage”), pp 546-47.

Today, …”in alcohol I found a false courage.” Whether I am far into recovery or just beginning, the time has come to be done with all that is not true. If I am hinging my sobriety on my spouse or partner not leaving me, keeping my job or convincing a judge I deserve a break from my latest DUI, my motivation to get sober is linked to something that may never happen and, if it doesn’t, my sobriety likely will not last. Whatever the untruths in my life and even in sobriety, the Fourth Step is my road map to honesty – the truth of my own life, my drinking, my recovery. May I not rely on some bottled courage as I set out to find my own truth. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

January 3

Step by Step

“We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals – usually brief – were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period, we get worse, never better.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 3 (“More About Alcoholism”), p 30.

Today, conceding to “our innermost selves” that we are alcoholic is the first step in recovery. Without that admission, every attempt to stop drinking is doomed to failure: our private drinking histories are mute testimony to that. But if we can finally admit to ourselves that we are alcoholic, the answer to the next logical question – Why do I have to quit altogether instead of cutting back? – is obvious: alcoholism is a progressive condition that is never cured and, when fed, gets worse. But alcoholism can be arrested, and the only guaranteed method is total abstinence. Today, if I still struggle that the drinking problem I clearly have has progressed into alcoholism, I have to retreat within my innermost self in absolute honesty and, if I acknowledge the obvious answer, AA awaits me, just for the asking. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

January 4

Step by Step

” …(O)ur problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 7 (“Working With Others”), p 103.

Today, the fights have been many, the injuries deep and some scars permanent. Lies have been bountiful, hurt to myself and others indelible, and the fun ceased long ago if it ever was fun at all. Enough is enough. To continue as is, is a spiral downward into a pit from which there may be no escape; to change course now, hope prevails. Today is the day I begin to answer what exists in my emotional and spiritual psyche that is fueled by alcoholic drinking, and I have grown tired of “fighting anybody or anything.” My hope cannot be in my own will power; it is as mythical as the magical unicorn. Hope now falls on AA and my commitment to honestly and diligently working its steps and principles. There, I have no reason to fight anyone and anything – other than my own resistance to surrender completely. Today, enough is enough; I surrender. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

[majestyjo]

From now on, these readings will be found in "Even More Recovery Readings" in the Daily Recovery Reading Section.

I will not be posting them individually again. I made the decision to copy all the readings, not just one.

Sorry for any inconvenience.

[majestyjo]

Some good thoughts Step 10 is a maintenance step so work it to maintain the recovery you have in today