The sick keeping the sick, sick
Feb 15, 2020 22:12:48 GMT -5
via mobile
majestyjo and joeykins like this
Post by joeykins on Feb 15, 2020 22:12:48 GMT -5
The sick keeping the sick, sick.
I've struggled over being one of the cool kids being accepted and included with the cool kids has always been a fantasy. Only in recovery and working an honest program did i realize that im only chasing a fantasy just as i was in active use, and my ideal fantasy being having an orgy of hot guys, however this never happened either because i had standards and morals and values. For the same reasons i could not make my fantasy come true in active use i was not accepted into the group of the cool/ sick people because im not one of them because i place principles before personality. Because i speak of my defects as well as my issues with the program. And when i spoke of my struggle to accept it as it is rather than look for a solution someone said the sick keep the sick, sick and it wasn't until then that i realized. I don't want to be part of a group that is dishonest to the program i don't want to be part of a group that antagonizes and pretends to care and want the best for me just to turn around and exclude and isolate me. Some of which is no fault but my own and calling people out on things that go against our traditions. Weather its 13th stepping, not being honest about clean time or spiritual cleanliness. I've just been looking at it the wrong way. Its a blessing that im not part of the different groups i'm sick enough without the secrets and dishonesty of others who will only keep me sick. Most recently i reached out not in the best of ways but basically called out some of the two faced people in the rooms not name specific which set a member off yelling and screaming at me at a meeting I let the member say their piece with a mediator for my safety even though it was an outside issue. After the meeting and when i talked to my sponsor it was agreed that me and the other member we're right that sometimes something needs to be said on the matter and some will become defensive in this case yelling and screaming and blaming and in other cases people will be calm and willing to hear criticism. Some will stick with the sick and keep the sick, sick and others will say their piece suggest they talk to their sponsor and let go and let god and revisit the issue if need be. In learning the sick keep the sick, sick I've learned that that's not the group of people i want to surround myself with. And letting go because some people just are not there in their recovery. My sponsor mentioned to me today " Some people are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves and do wrong anyways knowing their being dishonest and not fooling anyone.
I've struggled over being one of the cool kids being accepted and included with the cool kids has always been a fantasy. Only in recovery and working an honest program did i realize that im only chasing a fantasy just as i was in active use, and my ideal fantasy being having an orgy of hot guys, however this never happened either because i had standards and morals and values. For the same reasons i could not make my fantasy come true in active use i was not accepted into the group of the cool/ sick people because im not one of them because i place principles before personality. Because i speak of my defects as well as my issues with the program. And when i spoke of my struggle to accept it as it is rather than look for a solution someone said the sick keep the sick, sick and it wasn't until then that i realized. I don't want to be part of a group that is dishonest to the program i don't want to be part of a group that antagonizes and pretends to care and want the best for me just to turn around and exclude and isolate me. Some of which is no fault but my own and calling people out on things that go against our traditions. Weather its 13th stepping, not being honest about clean time or spiritual cleanliness. I've just been looking at it the wrong way. Its a blessing that im not part of the different groups i'm sick enough without the secrets and dishonesty of others who will only keep me sick. Most recently i reached out not in the best of ways but basically called out some of the two faced people in the rooms not name specific which set a member off yelling and screaming at me at a meeting I let the member say their piece with a mediator for my safety even though it was an outside issue. After the meeting and when i talked to my sponsor it was agreed that me and the other member we're right that sometimes something needs to be said on the matter and some will become defensive in this case yelling and screaming and blaming and in other cases people will be calm and willing to hear criticism. Some will stick with the sick and keep the sick, sick and others will say their piece suggest they talk to their sponsor and let go and let god and revisit the issue if need be. In learning the sick keep the sick, sick I've learned that that's not the group of people i want to surround myself with. And letting go because some people just are not there in their recovery. My sponsor mentioned to me today " Some people are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves and do wrong anyways knowing their being dishonest and not fooling anyone.
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.