Post by lildee on Dec 20, 2004 8:54:25 GMT -5
Hope for Today
Detaching with love was a behavior I assumed would never be part of my recovery, even though I knew my resentment over having an alcoholic parent was destroying me. In spite of the negative effects of my bitterness, I couldn't imagine living without it. Without resentment, who would I be?
When I finally became tired of hurting, AI-Anon offered me tools to incorporate into my life. Listening to others share in meetings, reading AI-Anon literature, becoming involved in service, and attending AI-Anon workshops and conventions lent me a new perspective. This outlook gave me the opportunity to become a different and better person, one who enjoyed the serenity of acceptance. Simply put, I slowly came to the realization that my alcoholic parent had been incapable of meeting my particular expectations. In his own way and to the extent of his abilities, he had provided me with love, life's necessities, and support in all my endeavors. Finally, instead of seeing a completely empty glass, I saw that my glass was partially full. I realized that my growing up years could have been so much worse than they were.
My father's recent death showed me that, at some point, I began loving him with detachment. A sense of release washed over me as I realized I had let go of the bitterness and resentment I once thought was permanent. In their place 1 have a newfound sense of freedom from resentments and hope for the future.
Thought for the Day
What role do my expectations as a child play in my difficulties as an adult?
"Relationships distorted by alcoholism and its effect on the drinker and on us are not healed overnight It Is not wise to expect too much too quickly." This Is Al-Anon, p. 9
Detaching with love was a behavior I assumed would never be part of my recovery, even though I knew my resentment over having an alcoholic parent was destroying me. In spite of the negative effects of my bitterness, I couldn't imagine living without it. Without resentment, who would I be?
When I finally became tired of hurting, AI-Anon offered me tools to incorporate into my life. Listening to others share in meetings, reading AI-Anon literature, becoming involved in service, and attending AI-Anon workshops and conventions lent me a new perspective. This outlook gave me the opportunity to become a different and better person, one who enjoyed the serenity of acceptance. Simply put, I slowly came to the realization that my alcoholic parent had been incapable of meeting my particular expectations. In his own way and to the extent of his abilities, he had provided me with love, life's necessities, and support in all my endeavors. Finally, instead of seeing a completely empty glass, I saw that my glass was partially full. I realized that my growing up years could have been so much worse than they were.
My father's recent death showed me that, at some point, I began loving him with detachment. A sense of release washed over me as I realized I had let go of the bitterness and resentment I once thought was permanent. In their place 1 have a newfound sense of freedom from resentments and hope for the future.
Thought for the Day
What role do my expectations as a child play in my difficulties as an adult?
"Relationships distorted by alcoholism and its effect on the drinker and on us are not healed overnight It Is not wise to expect too much too quickly." This Is Al-Anon, p. 9
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.