Post by lildee on Jan 7, 2005 0:46:38 GMT -5
Hope for Today
One of the first Alanon sayings I remember hearing, known as the three Cs, embodies the concept of powerlessness over alcoholism: "I didn't cause it, I can't control it, and I can't cure it."
I like the message of the three Cs. "I didn't cause it" relieves me of any lingering guilt I may feel: If only I had been a better son-worked harder at school, done more chores around the house, or not fought so much with my siblings-my parents may not have become alcoholics. In reality their suffering from the disease has nothing to do with me.
"I can't control it" gives me permission to live my life and to take care of myself. No longer do I have to spend my energy trying to manipulate people and situations so that the alcoholics will drink less. Nothing I say or do, or don't say or do, will have any effect on the alcoholics' choice to drink. That choice is
completely out of my hands.
"I can't cure it" reminds me that I don't have to repeat my insane behavior over and over again, hoping for different results. I don't have to keep giving one last exhausted effort to stop the drinking, hoping that "this time it will work." I don't have to search for the magic cure that isn't there. Instead I can use my energy for my recovery.
Thought for the Day
When I get confused about what being powerless over alcohol really means, the three Cs give me a clarifying touchstone.
"Active alcoholics are people who drink. They don't drink because of you or me, but because they are alcoholics. No matter what I do, I will not change this fact." Courage to Change, p. 74
One of the first Alanon sayings I remember hearing, known as the three Cs, embodies the concept of powerlessness over alcoholism: "I didn't cause it, I can't control it, and I can't cure it."
I like the message of the three Cs. "I didn't cause it" relieves me of any lingering guilt I may feel: If only I had been a better son-worked harder at school, done more chores around the house, or not fought so much with my siblings-my parents may not have become alcoholics. In reality their suffering from the disease has nothing to do with me.
"I can't control it" gives me permission to live my life and to take care of myself. No longer do I have to spend my energy trying to manipulate people and situations so that the alcoholics will drink less. Nothing I say or do, or don't say or do, will have any effect on the alcoholics' choice to drink. That choice is
completely out of my hands.
"I can't cure it" reminds me that I don't have to repeat my insane behavior over and over again, hoping for different results. I don't have to keep giving one last exhausted effort to stop the drinking, hoping that "this time it will work." I don't have to search for the magic cure that isn't there. Instead I can use my energy for my recovery.
Thought for the Day
When I get confused about what being powerless over alcohol really means, the three Cs give me a clarifying touchstone.
"Active alcoholics are people who drink. They don't drink because of you or me, but because they are alcoholics. No matter what I do, I will not change this fact." Courage to Change, p. 74
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.