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Post by Misty on Jan 17, 2005 21:05:47 GMT -5
These 2 emotions can cause character defects to appear cuz they are such strong and passionate feelings. I think you have to have Love to know what hate is. Do you have love or hate? Please let me know! Thanks------Mistyeve
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Post by johnl on Jan 17, 2005 22:18:07 GMT -5
I dislike some people, but I no longer hate. The first thing I learned how to do in sobriety was like myself then eventually love myself. Once I was able to love myself then I could love others.
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Post by knothead on Jan 18, 2005 0:14:51 GMT -5
I have heard or read somewhere that contrary to popular belief the opposite of love is not hate, but rather indifference. Why? Because it is possible love and hate someone or something or some idea at the same time. But it is quite impossible to love or hate anything or anyone and remain indifferent. If I were hate someone, it is precisely because I care at some level of my being for that individual.
That said, I try to love everyone, including those that I would perceive as enemies. It is only through my HPs help and the 12 steps of recovery that am able to do so, however. Harboring resentments has no place in my life today, thank G-d!!!!!!!
Peace & Love,
KnotHead
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Post by lildee on Jan 18, 2005 0:54:18 GMT -5
Good Morning Mistyeve,
Love /Hate
I agree with you either side of this chip can bring about a strong surge in emotions.
That is why I try to stay in balance. Not loving someone so much that I smother then or try to control them, or on the reverse side hating someone or thing so much that I wind up with resentments and anger.
Love and God Bless
Arlene
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Post by Lin on Jan 18, 2005 4:35:32 GMT -5
Each time I post on this chip i say I dont like to use the word HATE about anything. But jsut yesterday I used it.
I was at the doctor's office. He was explaining to me about my bone density and some labwork i am going to do today. If the results turn out one way, it means i can change to a different weekly pill. If the labwork shows another my only choice is daily shots in my stomach. I said "I hate shots. I want to do whatever I can to avoid that alternative>" But when I think about it, I dont actually hate a SHOT, I dont like the daily part of it and the in the stomach part. I told him I once had to take daily allergy shots. After about 5 weeks of it, i jsut quit. I decided I'd live with the allergies instead of the bruises, whelps, and the hassle of disposing of the needles properly. It wasn't the pain I dreaded...it was the other parts about it. I dont hate getting a shot for a sinus infection. I dont ENJOY it, but I sure don't HATE it. And HATE probably IS too strong of a owrd for this. The next two days i will be praying for ACCEPTANCE of whatever the outcome shows. I'll have to use my program and do the best I can with the new decision.
Like John...I had to learn to love myself before i can learn to love others. There were lots of times i did not even LIKE myself, let alone LOVE. My 1st 4th step helped me find many good things about ME that I could love and be proud of abuot ME. That helps start the process of loving.
HATE is a very negative emotion and feeling. I dont want to ahve it about anything. So even if I end up with the shots, I wont HATE it. I will learn to tolerate it and accept it and deal with the inconvenience.
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Post by Misty on Jan 18, 2005 9:01:19 GMT -5
My Very Dear Lin----You are sooooo
brave! I hate getting shots and it is cuz when I was 5 years old and I
had to get shots for school the stupid nurse broke the needle inside my arm!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhh! That was a long time ago and I still hate shots. I think everyone has a
child, parent, and adult inside of
their brain. You definitely have a
strong adult part that tells you to
accept it and do it. Don't mean to
play shrink here just sharing my own experience-strength-and hope.
So glad you could stop by today!!!
Love & Hugs----Mistyeve
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Post by Tiger on Jan 18, 2005 13:03:37 GMT -5
"We Don't Have To Like Them - We Have To Love Them"
Remember That?
Resentment can lead to "hate" but since "tolerance" is the lowest form of love - if we can tolerate them, we are loving them!
Tiger
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Post by dg on Jan 18, 2005 14:13:14 GMT -5
Hey Tiger, My mother used to say those wise words to me growing up~ To me Hate is just a form of resentment towards someone or something. Love is something you keep forever in your mind, and heart even if its a break up of someone, that love for the person still stays even if its a teeny tiny bit. I mean teeny tiny bit...  Just IMO... |
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Post by caressa on Jan 18, 2005 18:23:18 GMT -5
This is a disease of perception and I use to use both words to describe how I was feeling and looking back I over used, misused, and abused these words for many years.
Under that I thought was hate was anger, resentment, abandonment and a lot of combined emotions that were stuffed and were read to erupt. It was like a cess pool inside of me, and after years of stuffing, I really didn't know what I hated, it seemed like everything.
I was told I was love but I never believed it. Actions never seemed to follow the words. Today I prefer to like someone, and then if love follows, that is good.
Love is over worked and used and again so many people abuse it. There are many kinds of love, the greatest love I have found has been the unconditional love found in the rooms of recovery. Yet that can be suspect, because there is a lot of sick people in the fellowships. I need to find it within myself to be able to find it in others.
As Tiger so wisely put it, I don't have to like someone or their actions, but I do have to love them as a child of the God, they are deserving. More importantly, I am deserving.
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Post by jimmy62 on Jan 18, 2005 19:20:31 GMT -5
Dear Misty Eve!!
I do hate the things in this world hurt people like that awful Tsunami!! I love this program that safed my life and all the people at the tables and in EOR ...I know that love & hate are very strong words that we should not use lightly ...I used love way too much when i was younger and there were people that would tell me I wasn't in love that everybody said the love word and that it didn't mean anything and for years I believed them ...as for today I can love and mean it!! I do know the difference today!!!
Have another good 24 hours everybody!!
LOve&HUgs
Jimmy6
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Post by Misty on Jan 18, 2005 20:46:39 GMT -5
Hey Everybody!!! Wow! There are so many good comments!!! I love the variety of opinions and so glad all of you could stop by and share your
ideas and opinions. I just LOVE to hear from all of you and I sure hope you will keep coming back,,,,
Love & Hugs---Mistyeve
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Just IMO... 
~With Peace & Love, dg~ 8*)[/b][/size]
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.