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Post by Misty on Apr 17, 2005 21:52:22 GMT -5
I don't trust myself to go back to the Wed. 8pm meeting for a while.
The people were so critical and ungrateful toward my effort at putting on a presentation that I am
real just disgusted and can't really trust myself to NOT say any thing that I might regret. I am very suspicious that some of them are upset at my trying to to something different. I am praying
about it and have put it in the God Can so hopefully it will pass..
Do you trust or are you suspicious?
Please let me know! Thanks---Mistyeve
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Post by johnl on Apr 17, 2005 22:06:14 GMT -5
I trust give people the benefit of the doubt till they make me suspicious( not sure that makes any sence but I trust others and am slowly earning the trust of my family after 26 years of alcohol abuse,some are still waiting for the other shoe to drop so I guess I need to be patient. Hey Misty did.t Elvis have a song "Suspicious Minds?"
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Post by lildee on Apr 17, 2005 23:52:23 GMT -5
Good morning Mistyeve,
Sure your presentation was great !!! Stop being so hard on yourself. Look at it as something new to stimulate those dull foggy minds sitting there !!!
Trust/suspicious
For me going through everything that I have with the chaos of addiction TRUST HAS TO EARNED. Maybe I am slow at completely forgiving But you have to Show me the goods. This disease of addiction broke all the trust I had in the person that I cared about the most. In the beginning of working my program there was no trust . Zero, zip, nadda. Today knowing what I know and having worked my program, my trust has gone from zero to 90%. Even though he has been clean for 18 months and doing what he is supposed to do, there is still that doubt stored somewhere back in the recesses of my mind. I can't honestly say that I will ever be 100% trusting again. I am very well aware of the relapse rate that comes with his addiction. But it is something that I live with everyday and have to face. Hopefully God will prove me wrong.
Love & God Bless
Arlene
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Post by Misty on Apr 18, 2005 1:35:51 GMT -5
Dear John----What you were saying about trust is similar to the American ideal of innocent until proven guilty. Yeah Elvis did have a song called "Suspicious Minds" and there was a real good line in there that says "lets don't let a good thing die" cuz of suspicion and lies. Trust is a wonderful thing to have between 2 people. I want to trust that someone means what they say and says what they mean but unfortunately that isn't always the way it is. Glad you could stop by and talk about this!
Good to hear from you!-----Mistyeve
Dear Arlene---It is so good to hear that trust can be restored with the
family. Even after 21 years of sobriety my Mom will still question
me if I don't return a phone call right away or stop over when I say I will. She will always have a reserve of suspicion I guess even
after all these years of sobriety.
Thanks for the vote of confidence. I am doing another presentation this Sunday at a different meeting and just having some anxiety about it cuz it didn't go over very well
with the Wednesday people. I still
am NOT good with criticism especially when I am putting myself
in a position to be heckled or to be criticized. Thanks so much for stopping by to talk about this Honey! Good to hear from you!-----
Mistyeve
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Post by Lin on Apr 18, 2005 16:11:27 GMT -5
Lots of good replies to this. Sorry I waited until afternoon to get to it.
Trust or suspicious..I can sure relate to JOHN and that waiting for the other shoe to drop. I have done that every time my spouse went to rehab and woudl quit drinking for a while. Trust has to be earned.
I'm sorry the group did not take well to your efforts to do something different. I hope the other person who performed with you is not also staying away from the Wednesday groups. I would think a recovery group with people who are working a program have learned to FORGIVE...not to HOLD RESENTMENTS..... to not let the opinions of others sway them friom what they need to do...especially coming to a meeting. I cant imagine a group making a member not feel welcome. Could this be a perception you have that is not accurate? I have been in situations where i saw a situation much differently than the others around me saw it. Often i was wearing my feelings on my sleeves for some reason or another and it jsut hit me the wrong way.
Today I try to trust all people. But we have a person at one of my jobs that is very untrustworthy. She sneaks behind our backs and tries to double check and cross check resords to document any and all things we might ahve cheated or made a mistake on. it really makes us nervous.
LIN
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Post by shawnski11 on Apr 18, 2005 16:28:20 GMT -5
Sorry I missed your presentation,I'm sure it was fine your just beating yourself up. I understand perfectionism.perfect I want everything perfect.how perfect would life be if everything in life was perfect?Wouldn't that just be perfect. A perfect world, wouldn't that be fun, it would be just perfect.progress not not perfection, whats that about,how did they know that would be a problem. WOW how did they know. I trust I'm perfect today
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Post by Misty on Apr 18, 2005 20:24:25 GMT -5
Dear Lin----I am so glad I could trust you to cover the chip the other day. THANKYOU!!! It is good to hear from you and I am glad you could stop by. I don't think I am
misunderstanding people when they tell me the presentation was weird, strange, and very different. Those are NOT complimentary terms. Oh well I will survive and go somewhere else to do it at another
group who will (hopefully) enjoy!!!
Mistyeve
Dear Shawna----Hey! Good to hear from you honey! Glad ya had a chance to stop by-----Mistyeve
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. I will be back looking for Lin and others.