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Post by Misty on Jul 14, 2005 22:00:52 GMT -5
The program has taught me "to thy own self be true" I have to be loyal to myself and if I need to rest then get some rest. I am loyal to people who seem to deserve and appreciate it. I've made mistakes and been loyal to poeple who don't deserve it. I think that is just part of being human. I can't be right all the time! Are you loyal or disloyal??
Please let me know!----Mistyeve
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Post by Lin on Jul 15, 2005 4:18:46 GMT -5
To thine own self be true...very powerful statement. Being loyal is like that, but I have to not only be loyal to myself but to my HP and to many other people, places and things.
I am loyal to my sevice in recovery, I am loyal to my jobs...i show up early and give them their money's worth by giving 110% in all I do, I am loyal to my church amd my GOD, I am loyal to my spouse and most of my family and friends. There are a few who have proven they can't be trusted, so i am cautious with those, but for the most part LOYAL. I'm ot sure there is a person I ahve been loyal to who did not deserve it....all people deserve loyalty. I might say, instead of DESERVE, that a few have not APPRECIATED my loyalty. That's out of my control. If they choose not to appreciate my loyalty or reciprocate it,. that's THEIR choice. But I can still be loyal. It's kinda like the old saying of turn the other cheek.
LIN
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Post by Misty on Jul 15, 2005 5:58:49 GMT -5
Dear Lin---They say a dog is a very loyal pet. In my opinion that is why dog spelled backwards
is God. There is a little bit of God in a dog and it shows thru in their loyalty. Loyalty is a real
strong spiritual attribute in my opinion and is an important chip for me to work on. Thanks so much for stopping by to talk about this
Love & Loyal Hugs-----
Mistyeve
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Post by lildee on Jul 15, 2005 7:08:44 GMT -5
Good Morning Mistyeve,
Sorry that you found the biopsy so painful , but glad you came through it clean and sober. Just take things ODAT, and don't project into the future, what will be or won't be. It is all in God's hands.... He has the Master Plan.
Loyal/Disloyal
Glad you picked this chip today. For loyalty is something that I am struggling with right now. Yes I am loyal to my family and friends that is not where the issue is. I am having a real hard time staying loyal to this site. There are over 500 members and only a few bother to post or even to drop by and say hi. EOR has been my home from the beginning of my recovery, but the lack of good solid ESH is a big turn off. I remember when the boards were always hopping and there was always something pertinent to my recovery posted somewhere. It was through these boards that I was able to grow and form a solid foundation for my recovery. There was a time when I could barely keep up with all the posts and wonderful ESH that was here. I just don't know anymore ...... The one thing I will say is that I am not being complacent about my recovery. I am still working it maybe more than ever but it a different way, place and time. The lessons that I have learned here will always last a life time. It is just too bad that the message is not being shared with all the others out there that so desperately need help.
For all the "ghosts" out there who don't post..... the only way we grow in this program is by sharing our own life experiences and how we handle the various situations that confront us on a daily basis.
Love & God Bless
disheartened lildee
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Post by Lin on Jul 15, 2005 9:32:59 GMT -5
Thanks Lildee for the explanation to why you have been scarce lately. It's sad that EOR has gone down so badly. Kathleen poured her heart and soul into it and kept it running and active. It's too bad folks are abandoning ship. I too am getting very disheartened. The boards and the chatroom...even t he meetings. Just not what we use to have. I'm not sure I want to go to another site. If the site gets fewer posters, I may just stop my on line recovery. those bigger sites seem too big to me. They don't feel very welcoming to me. It feels like a certain clique or handful are good buddies and they want to just be with each other in private chat and ignore newcomers who come to the room. Perhaps it's just how i see it. But I feel totally ignored when I go to another site.
But I do agree. EOR is sinking fast. It's like a runaway freight train and I am powerless to do whatever it need to help out. The starfish story....saving those starfish by throwing them back. I cant save them all but I can save the one I'm throwing back in right now. I've tried to save the EOR starfish myself, but it appears the tide is coming in too fast,.
If you decide to totally leave EOR, we sure will miss you! I may be close on your heals. But I wont ever again put my life into a site like I did EOR. It's just too tiring to work that hard and have it dissolve like an ice cube on a sunny sidewalk.
I'll miss you LILDEE! (((hugs)))
Thanks for being such an important part of EOR and of my life. Glad we were there for each other when we found one another. I wish you the best in your future recovery!
LIN
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Post by johnl on Jul 15, 2005 11:00:39 GMT -5
As a sometime ghost I had to comment or (my personal opinion) as to why "ghosts don't post", reading some of these columns why would you want to post? You say lack of good solid ESH is a big turn off, I agree where is the ESH in the July 6th post rude/polite for example? Did you find any? I didnt.If I was new to recovery and read some of this negativity why would I post? There are bumps in the road to recovery I have them, that challenge my sobriety thats where I grow up, get help and deal with my problems. I have personal issues that I can deal with in public such as meetings or privately,with family and friends.If I want I can set up a BLOG on the internet for my friends.So why does recovery need to be negative? Why would anyone want to recover if they didnt have something positive to look forward too?If I had thought sobriety was going to be all gloom and doom, I wouldn't have bothered I would have just drank myself to death.There is truth to the saying you attract more bees with honey than vinegar.
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Post by Lin on Jul 15, 2005 13:27:50 GMT -5
Good point John! there is no need for negativity...especially if we are being critical of others. Which section did you mean the July 6th post? Do you mean the chipping away section? or did you mean some other post on the boards?
I think the reason I have enjoyed posting on these chips and chairing the meetings here at EOR is I can focus on the positive side of my character. I can recognize my strengths and build on them. The Friday night AlAnon and Sunday night ACOA meetings I have chaired here faithfully for about 6 years have been a huge part of my serenityand my recovery. I totally believe a meeting should be focused on the positive side of our recovery and not the negative. we can MENTION something negative but no need to beat a dead horse about it. Instead, mention something and tell how we use the program tools to deal with it in a healthy way. that way we continue to focus on the solution instead of the problem. I never could understand why a meeting had to be all abut our problems...that's more like wanting attention and wanting folks to pity us. I'm beyond that pity stage. if i have a problem, I want to deal with it in a healthier way today...use my program and move on with a healthier happier life. That's the way I try to conduct the meetings I chair here. Sorry folks dont find the support they used to find at those meetings.
I'm jsut tired of only 4 or 5 people keeping the boards going. When kathleen ahd the site we had 25 to 30 posting every day. Times change. people change. people move on. I appreciate those who are LOYAL to EOR.
really wonderful to see you posting JOHN!
LIN
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Post by shelie on Jul 15, 2005 13:42:00 GMT -5
Remember everyone, just because people don't post doesn't mean they aren't getting anything out of what they read. I think many people are still trying to figure themselves out when they come to EOR, they listen more than they talk, and they probably need to. I would like to remind you all that EORs membership has grown by over 100 in the last year or so. Kathleen is definitely missed and she did pour her soul into it, but those of you who have been keeping the site up and running aren't doing so bad either. Just wanted to give some positive feedback.
Shelie
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Post by Misty on Jul 15, 2005 23:15:58 GMT -5
Hey Everyone!!! I am real surprised and pleased to get some feedback on this chip. The column has been like my baby---sometimes
positive & sometimes negative. I
think it is honest & realistic cuz
it has a mix of box. I want to thank everyone for stopping by &
please keep coming back! Grateful
Hugs & Thanks----Mistyeve
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. I will be back looking for Lin and others.