Loving,caring/Indifferent

[caressa]

When I looked at this, I wanted to add abusive.

I took a friend to a Turkey Christmas dinner last night at NA and I have never been able to get her to go there with me, but she has gone to AA.

I have been going to NA for 14 years and although I haven't gone 90 in 90, I did know 3/4s of the people in the room. I know it was a special occasion and I took a whole watermelon to contribute to the meal. The guy who chaired the meeting made a statement that my friend took personal and went home. He said it was for regulars, and he was glad to see a big crowd and he hoped that the four birds they had was enough for everyone. To my knowledge, NA never turned away a newcomer.

I have known this person since the day he came into recovery. He has come a long way from where he was at. I told my friend that I had warned her about his attitude and she said she didn't care, I refuse to lower my level of thinking and being to his, so I can belong."

You never know what kind of message you are caring to those around you. Is it a positive, loving one?

[Lin]

Am I to assume this is the same person who wanted to vote if they would ALLOW you to return>? It sounds to me like you need to go one more time...and tell the group to have one of them call you and you'll come back...when this kind of non-recovey crap stops. I never heard of a person being turned away...even at a turkey dinner. 4 turkeys should be enough to feed over 100 people if they are large turkeys. Who carse if a newcomer wants to join in???It sounds liek this person is a jerk....trying to make up the rules so only the people HE LIKES will ever come back. It sure woudl not be ME...but I do think I'd have my say and let them know exactly how they are appearing to others. And we wonder why newcomer never return? This could be it...limiting a get-together to only "regulars".

loving and caring or indifferent? I was thinking of something I did the other day. I'm not sure if it was indifferent...but again it was me making a statement.

We have Salvation Army kettles by doors this time of year. There has been alot in the news lately and the paper about places that refuse to say MERRY CHRISTMAS because it might offend 10% of the population. I rarely pass a kettle without putting in some money. The other day I came upon a kettle and the man said HOWDY. I walked on past. Then another day a kettle and the person said HAPPY HOLIDAYS. I walked on past. Then one said MERRY CHRISTMAS...I stopped and got out more than jsut what was in my pocket...dug into the wallet and I told her..I am giving this to you for saying MERRY CHRISTMAS to me.

I wondered later if I was being uncaring. I know it was not indiffference. It was jsut me makign a statement because THEY were making a statement I disagreed with.

LIN

[caressa]

This was a different guy. The other guy didn't show although he said he might. He didn't promise. This guy doesn't work. The other one is more interest in money than people. Sponsors a lot of guys because he has a lot of time in the program. What he doesn't have is a lot of time to work on himself. He seems like Mr. Serene to most people, yet to me, he is shut down and shut off from feelings. There has been some growth in the past year, he is better than he use to be.