|
|
Post by Lin on Mar 3, 2006 19:23:15 GMT -5
Nobody has posted or replied since my birthday. I guess nobody has any defects but ME. lol
How about assertive/submissive?
When I am being assertive I let others know my feelings but I also make sure to take into considerations THEIRS. I avoid becoimng a doormat. But I also avoid being boss=y and domineering.
I voice my opinion but I do so without causing a scene.
A few hours ago we went out to eat. We did not like the food. Instead of calling over the manager and making a scene I took home a coment card. I wrote up a card giving my opinion on that.
Are you assertive or submissive?
LIN
|
|
|
|
Post by dg on Mar 4, 2006 15:41:48 GMT -5
I guess I am lazy at doing this chip column LIn.. lol I am both. I can be assertive when I feel I need to speak my piece. BUT I don't do it often because I don't want to be labeled a nag, or whiner, or whatever so therefore I become submissive!  oh well. Now if I had a complaint about the food, and I am paying money for this food, you bet I will say something to the manager or whoever takes the money and ask me "how was your meal?" Sometimes I will get a reduction for it, sometimes I get "gee thats too bad" response. At least I am nice about it when I complain tho. |
|
|
|
Post by Lin on Mar 7, 2006 5:30:47 GMT -5
this time is was fast food. SO nobody asked. I asked my husband if he wantd me to go ask for a manager and he said NO so I just took home the comment card and filled it in.
LINDA
|
|
|
|
Post by lildee on Mar 7, 2006 16:06:35 GMT -5
Going to be a little assertive here, beg pardon, and sorry if I offend anyone.....
Quite frankly when the same 3 or 4 people are the only ones posting and there are no replies to the things that are posted it becomes quite frustrating. It makes me feel why should I bother ? No one cares, they are too busy, or they just aren't interested. They have their books to read at home or go to their F2F meetings ..... and the site languishes. No fresh input. I am only one person and will readily admit that I can't do it all. This site is for everyone and everyone should be chipping in their part. Meetings have gone to the wayside, individual columns have followed a similar suite.
Yes I am angry and hurt. EOR has been my home forever. It was once bright and vibrant with meetings and lots of input. Now all I see is complacency. It is like an old mare being put out to pasture. If you yourself don't care who will ?
Just my humble opinions agree or not. Take what you like and leave the rest.
|
|
|
|
Post by Lin on Mar 7, 2006 19:01:13 GMT -5
(((lildee)))
I was thinking the same thing this wek. Where has everybody GONE???
out to pasture I guess...
LIN
|
|
|
|
Post by Gramm4 on Mar 7, 2006 21:27:24 GMT -5
Hi everyone. So sorry for not posting anything recently but having been so sick over the last month I have been unable to focus on much of anything.
I have just been able to start getting back to meetings as well and I've really felt the effects of not going. This Friday night I will be recieving my 6 month pin. It feels really good living the program. Tomorrow morning my sponser will be coming over and I will be doing my 5th step with her. I thought I'd be very nervous about it but I'm actually looking forward to it. Having finished the 4th step was amazing. The sense of relief I got when I finished it was so releasing.
What I think I've been assertive about is telling non-program friends that I have to give up a lot of activities they expect me to go to. They have been complaining that I haven't been there for them. I had to tell them that right now I'm working on me and that is more important to me. I still try to keep in touch with some of them and most of them are trying to understand where I'm coming from. Before coming back to the program, I would usually do what they wanted, when they wanted to do it without complaint. Now I can say no without feeling guilty. A great feeling!!
|
|
|
|
Post by Lin on Mar 10, 2006 5:25:49 GMT -5
Theresa thanls for posting. Congrats on your 6 month pin and for finishing your 4th step! I also felt a sense of relief when I had completed my 4th step. I've worked a 4th and fifth several times over the lat 11 years. The the oddest one was a three way 5th. A lady and I had alot in common and sort of -co-sponsored each other. When it came to the 5th we both wanted somebody with more time in...so we invited another friend and we all had a three way 5th. It was a conversaion with all three of us talking about our defects and assets. That seems strange looking back but we were all very comfortable. We were all three teachers and that common bond made us feel very comfortable. my last 5th my sponsor and I went to a park inthe springtime and sat on top of a picnic table and talked and cried and talked and laughed and talked. It was great.
I hope your 5th is an enjoyable experience that helps you grow in your recovery.
I have heard that many people who get clean/sober have to give up old buddies and old habits. I'm glad you are able to keep intouch but at a safe distance that will help you maintain your sobriety.
LIN
|
|
|
|
Post by dg on Mar 11, 2006 19:19:49 GMT -5
I finally got my internet back, nothings the same around here anymore and it is indeed sad to see that so many ole timers or new don't come back. With all the others trying to post to keep this site going, its hard not to feel discouraged. At least I have the memories of what HAS BEEN and do hope that someday there will be a different pace, IF that ever happens we can only hope.
take care and have a great day.
|
|
oh well.
~With Peace & Love, dg~ 8*)[/b][/size]
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.