Nothing Changes ~ If Nothing Changes

[SunnyGirl]

I've been home for about a week now, was back in the
midwest, visiting my Mom and two sisters.

My baby sis, is an active addict, drug of choice....
<prescription drugs>alcohol>gambling>
She and hubby(addict) lived for many years here in Sin City.
Having lost everything, they decided a "do over" was
in order and moved back home with Mom.

Nothing Changes ~ If Nothing Changes

First thing she does is get a doctor and new prescriptions...
She then runs her truck into a culvert and is taken to the
hospital. She's ok, but the truck is a mess and she has
to go to court for a reckless driving ticket.

In trying to talk to her, she accuses me of having a "holier
than thou" attitude and asks if I've been "reading that
recovery crap again". ;D I made the decision right then
and there that I would come back to EOR and fill my head
with every slogan and bit of wisdom I can find.

Have a wonderful evening..... ~SunnyGirl~

[Lin]

Welcome HOME!

I reme,ber this slogan was one of your favorites. Every time I say it I think of YOU. One open meeting you picked it as a topic and it was one of the best online emetings I ever attended.

YOu are right. Getting back to EOR, posting, replying, reading the literature, can really make us re-fucus on the things we can change and recognize those things we can't change.
One thing I have learned..when I started to change. some folks around me did not appreciate the changes, but they soon learned I was determined to change. And once I changed, those around me also softened a buit. That was good!

nothing changes if nothing changes? Correct! If i keep doing things the same way I always have, and expect different results I will certainly be in for a big disappintment.

But learning that I can make changes in my actions and my attitude was exactly what I needed to do.

Again, Sunnygirl, WELCOME HOME!

LIN

[SunnyGirl]

It's good to be home! ((((( Lin )))))

I know that Al-Anon and Nar-Anon have both given
me life skills that have helped me thru the years.
I've clung to them and tried to live by them faithfully,
but I've come up short a few times.....

With my sister, this has been an ongoing situation,
off and on for many years. I've learned to cope by
walking away and refusing to be baited.

You are right Lin.... Nothing Changes ~ If Nothing Changes
has always been one of my favorites. That and the
definition of Insanity......

"Endlessly repeating the same process
expecting different results"

I know one thing for sure, I need a tune up, my resolve
was getting awfully thin.... Luv You, ~SunnyGirl~

[Lin]

When our resolve wears thin, it's time for a big dose of recovery! Glad you are back. I hope you have some of the alanon books at home. Reading the books...especially the daily reding books really helps me out between my meetings. Posting from the heart and replying to other posts also helps me. Attending online meetings is a bonus! We used to have some really great meetins here! I now work 2 evenings a weeek and go to my f2f another night, soI had to cut back on chairing meetings every week. I do attend when I get a chance, though.
Keep coming back...it works if you work it!

LIN

[mrsspanish]

right on!!!!!..Thanks for reminding me about what is insanity. I had forgotton andhave gotten back to doing it in many scenarios with no good results. I will now make a conscious effort to avoid it. Glad to see you again cherie.
doris

[dg]

So true. My husband and I were just talking last nite about our one son that is not working and not trying, he is out there, just living at what ever comes his way. He wanted food and he told him that he needed to get it together, so. yes nothing changes if nothing changes with dealing with a child you love and so badly want to help, and having to only use a short line to help out.
Hard yes. but being in recovery and learning that we have to continue to use our tools even if it doesn't apply directly to us, yet it does in a round bout way.
I am going to tell my husband tonite about this slogan again. Its been awhile since I have told him this.
Maybe we can put it in good use with our "son".
take care guys.
have a good blessed day.

[caressa]

Thanks for the helpful words my friend. I was just talking to my sponsor yesterday and sharing with her that if you are in a comfort zone, and everything seems quiet and serene, perhaps it is time for change. I later read the "Courage to Change" and the "In God's Care" meditation readings for yesterday and they followed in the same theme of things.

I was reminded that what served me in good stead days, weeks, months and years ago doesn't necessarily mean it will work in today and that I may need to make some changes.

This is certainly true in regard to my relationship with my son.

I was waiting for the bus home today and a girl I met about 10 plu years ago came along and sat on the bench beside me. She took out a cigarette package and read the slogan on it.

"Heaven won't have me and Hell is afraid that I will take over." I think it is called control issues. LOL.