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Post by caressa on Aug 26, 2008 15:44:34 GMT -5
Coming to this site is the way that I practice this tradition in my own personal life. I was told early in recovery that I needed to give it away in order to keep my sobriety. I also learned that I had to have something to give in order to give it away. You can't give what you don't have.
I am very grateful for those who have shared with me.
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Post by caressa on May 6, 2009 13:19:20 GMT -5
This was the topic this week at my Al-Anon meeting. The nice thing about it was that two people were there that hadn't been there for a while and one woman was new.
It is so important to recognize that the problem isn't about what the alcoholic is doing but focusing on ourselves. It isn't about OPs, it is about me and where I am at in my recovery. It is about me not focusing outside of myself at people, places and things to make me feel better. Not resenting about what I don't get from others who are not cabable of meeting my needs. The message of recovery is about learning to take care of myself, to live the Steps myself, and not focus on the symptom but at the cause and affect and what I can do to change. To give hope to others, to let them know that you have been there too and you can identify with them.
The one thing that stood out for me today was it isn't always the newcomer that is hurting. Some of us who have been here for a few 24 hours can hurt too.
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Post by mr sluggo on Jun 22, 2009 16:12:05 GMT -5
That's what I got in the beginning and I've heard other people say it too. I finally saw there was a way to live without all the nonsense and insanity that alcohol and heroin brought me. I was so happy in the beginning that I didn't feerl the way I used to anymore. I was kind of like the dog in the Bugs Bunny cartoon that said Which way did he go George which way did he go? It wasn't a pink cloud but just dumb happiness. ;D
And it continues to be that way almost 14 years later.
Simon
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Post by caressa on Jun 22, 2009 23:34:35 GMT -5
Thanks for sharing Simon. Haven't thought of that pink cloud for a long time. They say three months you are on it, but it seemed like I never left it. I was always so grateful for finally finding the solution that I had been looking for and the hope I needed to turn my life around. I had migraines the first seven years of recovery. My whole life has been pain because of emotions and arthritis. I could always work through them because of that hope to the other side and not have to pick up because I had the program.
For me it was pain pills, alcohol, and abusive relationships and although I hit emotional and spiritual bottoms after I came into recovery, I didn't have to pick up physically. I am so glad I had the program to give me direction and a foundation to base my life on. I have always had a strong support system. I was on the phone with my Al-Anon sponsor tonight and we talked for 2 1/2 hours. I asked her two years ago to go through the Al-Anon Steps with me and we are finally going to make the time to do it. I feel like I am at a place that I need change in my life. This will give me input and direction from another source and she will share her 18 years with me. So far, most of the talking has been my experience and I will have 18 years God willing in August. She felt like she was only able to be a support and listen and now she realizes that it is an exchange. I am always giving and I need to receive.
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Post by caressa on Jan 21, 2010 21:29:20 GMT -5
Tradition Five: Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.
1. Do I ever cop out by saying, "I'm not a gorup, so this or that Tradition doesn't apply to me"?
2. Am I willing to explain firmly to a newcomer the limitations of AA help, even if he gets mad at me for not giving him a loan?
3. Have I today imposed on any AA member for a special favor or consideration simply because I am a fellow alcoholic?
4. Am I willing to twelve step the next newcomer without regard to who or what is in it for me?
5. Do I help my gorup in every way i can to fulfill our primary purpose?
6. Do I remember that AA old-timers, too, can be alcoholics who still suffer? Do I try to help them and to learn from them?
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Post by caressa on Nov 26, 2010 11:00:13 GMT -5
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 13, 2016 2:26:33 GMT -5
I'm sorry, the link is no longer available. My sites are no more because Mulltiply closed. This is my favourite Tradition. It gave me a purpose in my life. It kept me coming back, because I had given up on myself and thought my God had given up on me. My primary purpose is to carry the message of recovery.  |
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Post by majestyjo on Apr 27, 2018 21:23:59 GMT -5
Learning the Traditions, so I live long enough to work the Steps.
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Post by caressa222 on May 19, 2018 22:30:15 GMT -5
AA Tradition Five
"Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
"Shoemaker, stick to thy last!" ... better do one thing supremely well than many badly. That is the central theme of this Tradition. Around it our Society gathers in unity. The very life of our Fellowship requires the preservation of this principle.
Alcoholics Anonymous can be likened to a group of physicians who might find a cure for cancer, and upon whose concerted work would depend the answer for sufferers of this disease. True, each physician in such a group might have his own specialty. Every doctor concerned would at times wish he could devote himself to his chosen field rather than work only with the group. But once these men had hit upon c cure, once it became apparent that only by their united effort could this be accomplished, then all of them would feel bound to devote themselves solely to the relief of cancer. In the radiance of such a miraculous discovery, any doctor would set his other ambitions aside, at whatever personal cost.
Just as firmly bound by obligation are the members of Alcoholics Anonymous, who have demonstrated that they can help problem drinkers as others seldom can. The unique ability of each A.A. to identify himself with, and bring recovery to, the newcomer in no way depends upon his learning, eloquence, or on any special individual skills. the only thing that matters is that he is an alcoholic who has found a key to sobriety. These legacies of suffering and of recovery are easily passed among alcoholics, one to the other. This is our gift from god, and its bestowal upon others like us is the one aim that today animates A.A.'s all around the globe.
There is another reason for this singleness of purpose. It is the great paradox of A.A. that we know we can seldom keep the precious gift of sobriety unless we give it away. If a group of doctors possessed a cancer cure, they might be conscience-stricken if they failed their mission through self-seeking. Yet such a failure wouldn't jeopardize their personal survival. for us, if we neglect those who are still sick, there is unremitting danger to our own lives and sanity. Under these compulsions of self-preservation, duty, and love, it is not strange that our Society has concluded that it has but one high mission - to carry the A.A. message to those who don't know there is a way out.
Highlighting the wisdom of A.A.'s single purpose, a member tells this story:
"Restless one day, I felt I'd better do some Twelfth Step work. Maybe I should take out some insurance against a slip. But first I'd have to find a drunk to work on.
"So I hopped the subway to Towns Hospital, where I asked Dr. Silkworth if he had a prospect. `Nothing too promising,' the little doc said. `There's just one chap on the third floor who might be a possibility. But he's an awfully tough Irishman. I never saw a man so obstinate. He shouts that if his partner would treat him better, and his wife would leave him alone, he'd soon solve his alcohol problem. He's had a bad case of D.T.'s, he's pretty foggy, and he's very suspicious of everybody. Doesn't sound too good, does it? But working with him may do something for you, so why don't you have a go at it?'
"I was soon sitting beside a big hulk of a man. Decidedly unfriendly, he stared at me out of eyes which were slits in his red and swollen face. I had to agree with the doctor - he certainly didn't look god. But I told him my own story. I explained what a wonderful Fellowship we had, how well we understood each other. I bore down hard on the hopelessness of the drunk's dilemma. I insisted that few drunks could ever get well on their own steam, but that in our groups we could do together what we could not do separately. He interrupted to scoff at this and asserted he'd fix his wife, his partner, and his alcoholism by himself. Sarcastically he asked, `How much does your scheme cost?'
"I was thankful I could tell him, `Nothing at all.'
"His next question: `What are you getting out of it?' "Of course, my answer was `My own sobriety and a mighty happy life.'
"Still dubious, he demanded, `Do you really mean the only reason you are here is to try and help me and to help yourself?'
"`Yes,' I said. `That's absolutely all there is to it. There's no angle.'
"Then, hesitantly, I ventured to talk about the spiritual side of our program. What a freeze that drunk gave me! I'd no sooner got the word `spiritual' out of my mouth than he pounced. `Oh!' he said. `Now I get it! You're proselytizing for some **** religious sect or other. Where do you get that "no angle" stuff? I belong to a great church that means everything to me. You've got a nerve to come in here talking religion!"
"Thank heaven I came up with the right answer for that one. It was based foursquare on the single purpose of A.A. `You have faith,' I said. `Perhaps far deeper faith than mine. No doubt you're better taught in religious matters than I. So I can't tell you anything about religion. I don't even want to try. I'll bet, too, that you could give me a letter-perfect definition of humility. But from what you've told me about yourself and your problems and how you propose to lock them, I think I know what's wrong.'
"`Okay,' he said. `Give me the business.'
"`Well,' I said, `I think you're just a conceited Irishman who thinks he can run the whole show.'
"This really rocked him. But as he calmed down, he began to listen while I tried to show him that humility was the main key to sobriety. Finally, he saw that I wasn't attempting to change his religious views, that I wanted him to find the grace in his own religion that would aid his recovery. From there on we got along fine.
"Now," concludes the old timer, "suppose I'd been obliged to talk to this man on religious grounds? Suppose my answer had to be that A.A. needed a lot of money; that A.A. went in for education, hospital, and rehabilitation? Suppose I'd suggested that I'd take a hand in his domestic and business affairs? Where would we have wound up? No place, of course."
Years later, this tough Irish customer liked to say, "my sponsor sold me one idea, and that was sobriety. At the time, I couldn't have bought anything else."
from bluidkiti
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Post by caressa222 on May 19, 2018 22:31:05 GMT -5
NA TRADITION FIVE
"Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry the message to the addict who still suffers."
In a group that is preoccupied with personal problems, the spirit may die back. The suffering we talk about in our meetings is the feeling of absolute hopelessness. Our new members are nervous over even allowing ourselves to seek help. Recovery seems so impossible that whatever help is available and whatever lengths we go to get it, we fear we will still come up short and be no better off. Like a lot of the lies that we fall prey to, we are the ones in the greatest danger. We get energy from helping others. Our new man or woman may with luck and grace stagger onward to a real meeting where caring and sharing are in evidence. We are the ones stuck with our silly games and our depleting supply of spiritual energy, aggressively taking matters once again into our own weary hands.
When we allow ourselves to be used as conduits of the love that originally attracted us to recovery, we are on safe ground. When we forget our role as caretakers and instruments of a loving God, it can seem like we have a lot at stake personally. We don't tend to recall that the supreme, all powerful, all loving creator of the universe is that one that is really protecting us. Going with God, we cannot lose. When we go back to actively listening not only to what is being said but what is not being said, we can, with prayer, begin to carry our message again. We are reminded where we come from and how much we wanted recovery in the beginning. We forget the pain of withdrawal the same way women forget the pain of childbirth. To stay clean, we help others who both remind us of our pain and help us hear the solutions we now have to share.
Complexity is not the key to doing better. Simplicity and surrender offer us a better platform on which to rebuild. This particularly applies to helping others get the help they need at our meetings. We care, we share, we know it works for us. We pass on what worked for us out of what we heard other share with us and our own experience. The message is not what we say. Anyone can "talk the talk." We carry the message by living in the solution to best of our ability. We welcome the addict to our group and we try to live, through our caring and sharing, the message of hope. I am being accepted until I can accept myself. I am being loved until I can love myself. The message that you are carrying to me is, "We love you. You are not along. We will help you. You can recover."
When we carry the message of recovery, we plant seeds, encourage growth and strengthen foundations. While we are carrying the message, addicts still suffering will continue to die in active addiction. Our group's focus is to carry the message, not the addict, not the addict's significant other, not the addict's children -- just the simple message of Narcotics Anonymous recovery. This message gets fragmented and clouded by ego and advice. It is necessary to maintain the spirit of unity in our message of recovery. None of us alone own the rights of Narcotics Anonymous and none of our ideas or opinions are the "best." We are individuals who come together to share the common bond of recovery. Our personal surrender speaks for itself when the group atmosphere is that of recovery, hope and strength. We can only keep what we have by giving it away. Our primary purpose is not respected when we become involved with outside issues or begin to compromise our spiritual principles. Newcomers keep us alive. They prevent our stagnation. We need to be nurtured and loved. Without surrendering to our 5th Tradition, we loose our purpose and die.
An addict shares, "The primary purpose of each group is to carry the message, not the mess. For me this tradition deals with the solutions of recovery that are continually facing each group and in turn each group member. We are not here to give consultation of financial, marriage or any other affairs. This tradition for me deals with the solution to the small wars of life that my disease escalates into major conflicts. I do not attend meetings to hear about what I am doing wrong, how I continue to do it wrong and how I am going to do it wrong again. I go to meetings to hear the message of recovery so that hopefully I will learn to do it, maybe not all that correctly, but in an appropriate manner next time. For me, this is what recovery is about. It is about striving for solutions instead of pondering on problems. This Tradition is written so that a newcomer who walks into the rooms hears about the solutions instead of the many other outside issues around today.
The primary purpose of NA is to carry the message to the addict who still suffers and this is what each of us must do if we are to continue to recover both as individuals and as a group. If we do not carry the NA message to the still suffering addicts, then we will loose our ability to attract new members. Without new members, NA will wither and die. Without NA, none of us has any chance to recover. It is said, time and again, that the newcomer is the lifeblood of NA; therefore it is no coincidence that one of the main themes through our literature states, "We can not keep what we have unless we give it away." To me this means that in order to stay clean, each of us a members of NA are obligated to do everything we can individually and, as a group, to see that the NA message reaches as many sick and suffering addicts as possible through group meetings, H&I, PI, or literature distribution. We are bound by the 5th tradition to get involved.
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Post by caressa222 on May 19, 2018 22:34:15 GMT -5
Learn to live the Traditions so you live long enough to work the steps.
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. I will be back looking for Lin and others.