Taking Things Personally

[caressa]

DAILY OM

Staying Afloat Amidst the Spin
Taking Things Personally

Every time you interact with others, you have the choice to listen to, acknowledge, and let go of their words, or you can take what they are saying personally. Taking things personally is often the result of perceiving a person’s actions or words as an affront or slight. In order to take something personally, you must read negative intent in an individual’s words or actions. But what people do and say has no bearing upon you and is usually based on their own experiences, emotions, and perceptions. If you attempt to take what they do or say personally, you may end up feeling hurt without reason.

If you are tempted to take a comment or action personally, creating some distance between yourself and the other person can help you. Try to determine what is at the root of your feelings. Ask yourself if the other person’s words or actions are just reinforcing some insecurity within you or if you can really be sure that an offense was intended. You may even want to ask them what they meant. Finally, put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Instead of taking their words as the truth, or as a personal affront, remember that whatever was said or done is based on their opinion and is more reflective of what is going on inside of them, rather than having anything to do with you. You may have been an easy target for someone having a bad day, and their comments may have been offered with no ill intentions.

When you recognize that what anyone says or does doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you, you will no longer feel hurt or attacked. While it’s easy to take things personally, you should never let anyone’s perceptions or actions affect how you see yourself or your worth. Your life is personal to you, and it is up to you to influence your own value and sense of well-being.

What do you think?

I was bad at this, I took everything personally. I was sure everyone was talking about me and I had such a low sense of self-esteem, that I often beat myself up when others finished off. There was mental abuse but I compounded it. I made it more vicious because I took everything as a put down and took everything on not knowing that sometmes it wasn't mine to take on and it was their own sh*t.

[SunnyGirl]

Good stuff here Caressa......

You have the choice to listen to, acknowledge, and let go
of their words, or you can take what they are saying personally.

I used to be a little more insecure but today, I figure if they
are talking about me, there leaving someone else alone.
Besides, today I think I am a good person, so how could any
one talk bad about me. ;D

I have few scars left from childhood...... Today is the first day
of the rest of my life and I've not had time today to mess any
thing up..... Hugs, SunnyGirl

[Lin]

I really have a problem with this. I take thengs very personally. I had a parent who wanted to pull their child out of my class. I tried and tried to think what I coudl have done wrong to make them do that. I could think of nothing. The child really seemed to enjoy my classs.

I later learned..the child was going home saying she did not like my class and the parents were jsut tired of hearing abotu it. ONce they told her ..OK...we will take you out, then she changed her tune. It's been 2 weeks and they ahve not pulled her out yet. I sent the paperwork, but they did not sign it.

I heard something at a emeting that I use often.
Q-tip. Get a q-tip and keep it close. The initials stand for Quit Taking it Personally.

Works for me
LIN

[majestyjo]

Don't take it personal. Recognize it as their stuff and let it go.