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Post by caressa222 on Sept 18, 2019 2:31:40 GMT -5
September 18, 2019 Honest relationships Page 272
"One of the most profound changes in our lives is in the realm of personal relationships."
Basic Text, p.57
Recovery gives many of us relationships that are closer and more intimate than any we've had before. As time passes, we find ourselves gravitating toward those who eventually become our friends, our sponsor, and our partners in life. Shared laughter, tears, and struggles bring shared respect and lasting empathy.
What, then, do we do when we find that we don't agree with our friends on everything? We may discover that we don't share the same taste in music as our dearest friend, or that we don't agree with our spouse about how the furniture should be arranged, or even find ourselves voting differently than our sponsor at a service committee meeting. Does conflict mean that the friendship, the marriage, or the sponsorship is over? No!
These types of conflict are not only to be expected in any long-lasting relationship but are actually an indication that both people are emotionally healthy and honest individuals. In any relationship where both people agree on absolutely everything, chances are that only one person is doing the thinking. If we sacrifice our honesty and integrity to avoid conflicts or disagreements, we give away the best of what we bring to our relationships. We experience the full measure of partnership with another human being when we are fully honest.
Just for Today: I will welcome the differences that make each one of us special. Today, I will work on being myself.
Copyright (c) 2007-2019, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 21, 2019 17:04:34 GMT -5
September 21, 2019 Prayer Page 275
"Prayer takes practice, and we should remind ourselves that skilled people were not born with their skills."
Basic Text, p.46
Many of us came into recovery with no experience in prayer and worried about not knowing the "right words." Some of us remembered the words we'd learned in childhood but weren't sure we believed in those words anymore. Whatever our background, in recovery we struggled to find words that spoke truly from our hearts.
Often the first prayer we attempt Is a simple request to our Higher Power asking for help in staying clean each day. We may ask for guidance and courage or simply pray for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out. If we find ourselves stumbling in our prayers, we may ask other members to share with us about how they learned to pray. No matter whether we pray in need or pray in joy, the important thing is to keep making the effort.
Our prayers will be shaped by our experience with the Twelve Steps and our personal understanding of a Higher Power. As our relationship with that Higher Power develops, we become more comfortable with prayer. In time, prayer becomes a source of strength and comfort. We seek that source often and willingly.
Just for Today: I know that prayer can be simple. I will start where I am and practice.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 23, 2019 17:54:06 GMT -5
September 23, 2019 Dealing with gossip Page 277
"In accordance with the principles of recovery, we try not to judge, stereotype, or moralize with each other."
Basic Text, p.11
Let's face it: In Narcotics Anonymous, we live in a glass house of sorts. Our fellow members know more about our personal lives than anyone has ever known before. They know who we spend our time with, where we work, what step we're on, how many children we have, and so forth. And what our fellow members don't know, they will probably imagine.
We may be unhappy when others gossip about us. But if we withdraw from the fellowship and isolate ourselves to avoid gossip, we also rob ourselves of the love, friendship, and unparalleled experience with recovery that our fellow members have to offer. A better way to deal with gossip is to simply accept the way things are and the way we are, and live our lives according to principles. The more secure we become with our personal program, the decisions we make, and the guidance we receive from a loving God, the less the opinions of others will concern us.
Just for Today: I am committed to being involved in the NA Fellowship. The opinions of others will not affect my commitment to recovery.
Copyright (c) 2007-2019, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved
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Post by caressa222 on Sept 24, 2019 16:23:33 GMT -5
September 24, 2019 A growing concept of God Page 278
"The only suggested guidelines are that this Power be loving, caring, and greater than ourselves. We don't have to be religious to accept this idea. The point is that we open our minds to believe."
Basic Text, p.24
In a lifelong process of coming to believe, our understanding of God will change. The understanding we have when new in recovery will not be the same when we have a few months clean, nor will that understanding be the same when we have a few years clean.
Our initial understanding of a Power greater than ourselves will most likely be limited. That Power will keep us clean but, we may think, nothing more. We may hesitate to pray because we have placed conditions on what we will ask our Higher Power to do for us. "Oh, this stuff is so awful, even God couldn't do anything," we might say, or "God's got a lot of people to take care of. There's no time for me."
But, as we grow in recovery, so will our understanding. We'll begin to see that the only limits to God's love and grace are those we impose by refusing to step out of the way. The loving God we come to believe in is infinite, and the power and love we find in our belief is shared by nearly every recovering addict around the world.
Just for Today: The God I am coming to understand has a limitless capacity for love and care. I will trust that my God is bigger than any problem I may have.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 25, 2019 4:00:21 GMT -5
September 25, 2019 The Fourth Step - fearing our feelings Page 279
"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."
Basic Text, p.30
A common complaint about the Fourth Step is that it makes us painfully conscious of our defects of character. We may be tempted to falter in our program of recovery. Through surrender and acceptance, we can find the resources we need to keep working the steps.
It's not the awareness of our defects that causes the most agony-it's the defects themselves. When we were using, all we felt was the drugs; we could ignore the suffering our defects were causing us. Now that the drugs are gone, we feel that pain. Refusing to acknowledge the source of our anguish doesn't make it go away; denial protects the pain and makes it stronger. The Twelve Steps help us deal with the misery caused by our defects by dealing directly with the defects themselves.
If we hurt from the pain of our defects, we can remind ourselves of the nightmare of addiction, a nightmare from which we've now awakened. We can recall the hope for release the Second Step gave us. We can again turn our will and our lives over, through the Third Step, to the care of the God of our understanding. Our Higher Power cares for us by giving us the help we need to work the rest of the Twelve Steps. We don't have to fear our feelings. Just for today, we can continue in our recovery.
Just for Today: I won't be afraid of my feelings. With the help of my Higher Power, I'll continue in my recovery.
Copyright (c) 2007-2019, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 26, 2019 16:48:33 GMT -5
September 26, 2019 Seeing ourselves in others Page 280
"It will not make us better people to judge the faults of another."
Basic Text, p.38
How easy it is to point out the faults of others! There's a reason for this: The defects we identify most easily in others are often the defects we are most familiar with in our own characters. We may notice our best friend's tendency to spend too much money, but if we examine our own spending habits we'll probably find the same compulsiveness. We may decide our sponsor is much too involved in service, but find that we haven't spent a single weekend with our families in the past three months because of one service commitment or another.
What we dislike in our fellows are often those things we dislike most in ourselves. We can turn this observation to our spiritual advantage. When we are stricken with the impulse to judge someone else, we can redirect the impulse in such a way as to recognize our own defects more clearly. What we see will guide our actions toward recovery and help us become emotionally healthy and happy individuals.
Just for Today: I will look beyond the character defects of others and recognize my own.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 27, 2019 23:44:04 GMT -5
September 27 Right Back Up
"There is something in our self-destructive personalities that cries for failure."
Basic Text, p.77
"Poor me; woe is me; look at me, my life is such a mess! I've fallen, and no matter how hard I try, I continue to fail!" Many of us came to NA singing this sad refrain.
Life isn't like that anymore. True, sometimes we still stumble; at times we even fall. Sometimes we feel like we can't move forward in our lives, no matter how hard we try. But the truth of the matter is that, with the help of other recovering addicts in NA, we find a hand to pull us up, dust us off, and help us start all over again. That's the new refrain in our lives today. No longer do we say, "I'm a failure and I'm going nowhere!" Usually, it's more like, "Rats! I hit that same bump in the road of life again. Pretty soon I'll learn to slow down or avoid it entirely!" Until then, we may continue to fall down occasionally, but we've learned that there's always a helping hand to set us on our feet again.
Just for today: If I begin to cry failure, I'll remember there is a way to move forward. I will accept the encouragement and support of NA.
pg. 281
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 27, 2019 23:46:23 GMT -5
September 28 Hope
"Gradually as we become more God-centered than self centered, our despair turns to hope."
Basic Text, p.92
As using addicts, despair was our relentless companion. It colored our every waking moment. Despair was born of our experience in active addiction: No matter what measures we tried to make our lives better, we slid ever deeper into misery. Attempts we made to control our lives frequently met with failure. In a sense, our First Step admission of powerlessness was an acknowledgment of despair.
Steps Two and Three lead us gradually out of that despair and into new hope, the companion of the recovering addict. Having accepted that so many of our efforts to change have failed, we come to believe that there is a Power greater than ourselves. We believe this Power can - and will - help us. We practice the Second and Third Steps as an affirmation of our hope for a better life, turning to this Power for guidance. As we come to rely more and more on a Higher Power for the management of our day - to - day life, the despair arising from our long experiment with self-sufficiency disappears.
Just for today: I will reaffirm my Third Step decision. I know that, with a Higher Power in my life, there is hope.
pg. 282
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 29, 2019 6:01:08 GMT -5
September 29, 2019 Just for today Page 283
"When we stop living in the here and now, our problems become magnified unreasonably."
Basic Text, p.99
"Just for today" - it's a comforting thought. If we try to live in the past, we may find ourselves torn by painful, disquieting memories. The lessons of our using are not the teachers we seek for recovery. Living in tomorrow means moving in with fear. We cannot see the shape of the secret future, and uncertainty brings worry. Our lives look overwhelming when we lose the focus of today.
Living in the moment offers freedom. In this moment, we know that we are safe. We are not using, and we have everything we need. What's more, life is happening in the here and now. The past is gone and the future has yet to arrive; our worrying won't change any of it. Today, we can enjoy our recovery, this very minute.
Just for Today: I will stay in the here and now. Today - this moment - I am free.
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Post by majestyjo on Sept 30, 2019 2:33:58 GMT -5
September 30, 2019 Being ourselves Page 284
"Our real value is in being ourselves."
Basic Text, p.105
Over and over, we have tried to live up to the expectations of those around us. We may have been raised believing that we were okay if we earned good grades in school, cleaned our rooms, or dressed a certain way. Always wanting to belong and be loved, many of us spent a lot of time trying to fit in-yet we never quite seemed to measure up.
Now, in recovery, we are accepted as we are. Our real value to others is in being ourselves. As we work the steps, we learn to accept ourselves just as we are. Once this happens, we gain the freedom to become who we want to be.
We each have many good qualities we can share with others. Our experiences, honestly shared, help others find the level of identification they need to begin their recovery. We discover that we all have special gifts to offer those around us.
Just for Today: My experience in recovery is the greatest gift I can give another addict. I will share myself honestly with others.
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 2, 2019 12:39:34 GMT -5
October 01, 2018 Not just a motivation for growth Page 287
"We learn that pain can be a motivating factor in recovery."
Basic Text, p.30
"Pain-who needs it!" we think whenever we're in it. We see no good purpose for pain. It seems to be a pointless exercise in suffering. If someone happens to mention spiritual growth to us while we're in pain, we most likely snort in disgust and walk away, thinking we've never encountered a more insensitive person.
But what if human beings didn't feel pain-either physical or emotional? Sound like an ideal world? Not really. If we weren't capable of feeling physical pain, we wouldn't know when to blink foreign particles out of our eyes; we wouldn't know when to stop exercising; we wouldn't even know when to roll over in our sleep. We would simply abuse ourselves for lack of a natural warning system.
The same holds true for emotional pain. How would we have known that our lives had become unmanageable if we hadn't been in pain? Just like physical pain, emotional pain lets us know when to stop doing something that hurts. But pain is not only a motivating factor. Emotional pain provides a basis for comparison when we are joyful. We couldn't appreciate joy without knowing pain.
Just for Today: I will accept pain as a necessary part of life. I know that to whatever level I can feel pain, I can also feel joy.
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 2, 2019 12:41:01 GMT -5
October 02, 2019 Keeping faith Page 288
"We grasp the limitless strength provided for us through our daily prayer and surrender as long as we keep faith and renew it."
Basic Text, p.46
There are two parts to recovery: getting clean, and staying clean. Getting clean is comparatively easy because we only have to do it once. Staying clean is more difficult, requiring attention every day of our lives. Yet both draw their power from faith.
We got clean on faith. We admitted that addiction was more powerful than we were, and we stopped trying to fight it on our own. We turned the battle over to a Power greater than ourselves, and that Higher Power got us clean. We stay clean each day the same way: on faith. Just for today, we surrender. Life may be too big for us to tackle on our own power. When it is, we seek a Power greater than ourselves. We pray, asking our Higher Power for direction and the strength to follow it. By exercising and renewing our faith on a daily basis, we tap the resources we need to live clean, full lives.
There is limitless strength available to us whenever we need it. To grasp it, all we need to do is keep faith in the Higher Power that got us clean and keeps us clean.
Just for Today: Faith got me clean, and faith will keep me clean. Today, I will keep faith with my Higher Power. I will renew my surrender and pray for knowledge and strength.
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 3, 2019 11:35:56 GMT -5
October 03, 2019 Losing self-will Page 289
"Our egos, once so large and dominant, now take a back seat because we are in harmony with a loving God. We find that we lead richer, happier, and much fuller lives when we lose self-will."
Basic Text, p.105
Addiction and self-will go hand in hand. The unmanageability that we admitted to in Step One was as much a product of our self-will as it was of our chronic drug abuse. And today, living on self-will can make our lives just as unmanageable as they were when we were using. When our ideas, our desires, our demands take first place in our lives, we find ourselves in constant conflict with everyone and everything around us.
Self-will reflects our reliance on ego. The only thing that will free us from self-will and the conflict it generates in our lives is to break our reliance on ego, coming to rely instead on the guidance and power offered us by a loving God.
We are taught to consult spiritual principles, not our selfish desires, in making our decisions. We are taught to seek guidance from a Higher Power, one with a larger vision of things than our own. In doing this, we find our lives meshing more and more easily with the order of things around us. No longer do we exclude ourselves from the flow of life; we become a part of it, and discover the fullness of what recovery has to offer.
Just for Today: I seek freedom from ego and the conflicts generated by self-will. I will try to improve my conscious contact with the God of my understanding, seeking the guidance and power I need to live in harmony with my world.
Copyright (c) 2007-2019, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 5, 2019 21:57:47 GMT -5
October 05, 2019 Ask for mercy, not justice Page 291
"Many of us have difficulty admitting that we caused harm for others... We cut away our justifications and our ideas of being a victim."
Basic Text, p.38
Our lives are progressing nicely. Things are going good, and each year in recovery brings more material and spiritual gifts. We may have a little money in the bank, a new car, or a committed relationship. We have a little self-confidence, and our faith in a Higher Power is growing.
Then, something happens. Someone breaks into our new car and steals the stereo, or the person we're in the relationship with becomes unfaithful. Right away, we feel victimized. "Where's the justice?" we wail. But if we take a look back on our own behavior, we may find that we've been guilty of what's just been done to us. We realize we wouldn't really want justice-not for ourselves, and not for others. What we want is mercy.
We thank a loving God for the compassion we've been shown, and we take the time to appreciate all the precious gifts that recovery brings.
Just for Today: I will pray for mercy, not justice. I am grateful for the compassion I've been shown, and will offer mercy to others.
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Post by caressa222 on Oct 6, 2019 4:33:33 GMT -5
October 06, 2019 Amends without expectations Page 292
"Projections about actually making amends can be a major obstacle both in making the list and in becoming willing."
Basic Text, p.39
The Eighth Step asks us to become willing to make amends to all persons we have harmed. As we approach this step, we may wonder what the outcome of our amends will be. Will we be forgiven? Relieved of any lingering guilt? Or will we be tarred and feathered by the persons we've harmed?
Our tendency to seek forgiveness must be surrendered if we expect to receive the spiritual benefits of the Eighth and Ninth Steps. If we approach these steps expecting anything, we're likely to be very disappointed with the results. We want to ask ourselves if we are pinning our hopes on gaining the forgiveness of the person to whom we are making amends. Or maybe we're hoping we'll be excused from our debts by some sympathetic creditor moved to tears by our hard-luck story.
We need to be willing to make our amends regardless of the outcome. We can plan the amends, but we can't plan the results. Although we may not be granted a full pardon by everyone to whom we owe amends, we will learn to forgive ourselves. In the process, we will find that we no longer have to carry the burdens of the past.
Just for Today: I will let go of any expectations I have on the people to whom I owe amends.
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 8, 2019 2:53:15 GMT -5
October 08, 2019 A new pattern of living Page 294
"We suspect that if we do not use what we have, we will lose what we have."
Basic Text p. 78
Addiction gave a pattern to our lives, and with it a meaning-a dark, diseased meaning, to be sure, but a meaning nonetheless. The Narcotics Anonymous recovery program gives us a new pattern of living to replace our old routines. And with that new pattern comes a new meaning to our lives, one of light and hope.
What is this new pattern of living? Instead of isolation, we find fellowship. Instead of living blindly, repeating the same mistakes again and again, we regularly examine ourselves, free to keep what helps us grow and discard what doesn't. Rather than constantly trying to get by on our own limited power, we develop a conscious contact with a loving Power greater than ourselves.
Our life must have a pattern. To maintain our recovery, we must maintain the new patterns our program has taught us. By giving regular attention to these patterns, we will maintain the freedom we've found from the deadly disease of addiction, and keep hold of the meaning recovery has brought to our lives.
Just for Today: I will begin a new pattern in my life: the regular maintenance of my recovery.
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 10, 2019 19:09:41 GMT -5
October 10, 2019 Consequences Page 296
"Before we got clean, most of our actions were guided by impulse. Today, we are not locked into this type of thinking."
Basic Text, p. 90
Ever been tempted to do something even when you knew the results would be disastrous? Ever thought about how much it was going to hurt to do what you were tempted to do, then proceed to do it anyway?
It is said that there are consequences to every action. Before we got clean, many of us simply didn't believe this. But now we know exactly what it means. When we act, we know there will be consequences to pay. No longer can we decide to do something in ignorance when we know full well that we won't like the price we'll have to pay.
There's a prize and a price. It's okay to act despite the consequences if we're willing to pay the price, but there's always one to pay.
Just for Today: I will think about the consequences of my actions before I take them.
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 12, 2019 22:14:58 GMT -5
October 12, 2019 Being right Page 298
"When we admit that our lives have become unmanageable, we don't have to argue our point of view... We no longer have to be right all the time."
Basic Text, p. 58
Nothing isolates us more quickly from the warmth and camaraderie of our fellow NA members than having to be "right." Insecure, we pretend to be some kind of authority figure. Suffering from low self-esteem, we try to build ourselves up by putting others down. At best, such tactics push others away from us; at worst, they draw attack. The more we try to impress others with how "right" we are, the more wrong we become.
We don't have to be "right" to be secure; we don't have to pretend to have all the answers for others to love or respect us. In fact, just the opposite is true. None of us have all the answers. We depend upon one another to help bridge the gaps in our understanding of things, and we depend upon a Power greater than our own to make up for our personal powerlessness. We live easily with others when we offer what we know, admit what we don't, and seek to learn from our peers. We live securely in ourselves when we cease relying on our own power and start relying on the God we've come to understand in recovery.
We don't have to be "right" all the time, just recovering.
Just for Today: God, I admit my powerlessness and the unmanageability of my life. Help me live with others as an equal, dependent upon you for direction and strength.
Copyright (c) 2007-2019, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved
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Post by majestyjo on Oct 13, 2019 5:33:21 GMT -5
October 13, 2019 Making a difference Page 299
"Words cannot describe the sense of spiritual awareness that we receive when we have given something, no matter how small, to another person."
Basic Text, p. 104
Sometimes it seems as though there is so much wrong with the world that we might as well forget trying to make a difference. "After all," we think, "what in the world can I do? I'm just one person." Whether our concerns are so broad that we desire global peace or so personal that we simply want recovery made available to every addict who wants it, the task seems overwhelming. "So much work to do, so little time," we sigh, sometimes wondering how we'll ever do any good.
Amazingly enough, the smallest contributions can make the biggest difference. To gain more from life than an ordinary, plodding existence requires very little effort on our parts. We ourselves are transformed by the deep satisfaction we experience when we lift the spirits of just one person. When we smile at someone who is frowning, when we let someone in front of us on the freeway, when we call a newcomer just to say we care, we enter the realm of the extraordinary.
Want to change the world? Start with the addict sitting next to you tonight, and then imagine your act of kindness multiplied. One person at a time, each one of us makes a difference.
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Post by caressa222 on Oct 19, 2019 0:44:55 GMT -5
October 18, 2019 We all belong Page 304
"Although 'politics makes strange bedfellows,' as the old saying goes, addiction makes us one of a kind."
Basic Text, p.87
What a mixture of folks we have in Narcotics Anonymous! In any given meeting on any given night, we'll find a variety of people that probably never would have sat down in a room together if it weren't for the disease of addiction.
A member who is a physician described his unwillingness to identify at his first meeting by refusing to go into "that room full of junkies." Another member with an extensive background in jails and institutions shared a similar story, except that her shock and surprise stemmed from the realization that "there were nice people there-wearing suits, yet!" These two friends recently celebrated their seventh wedding anniversary.
The most unlikely people form friendships, sponsor each other, and do service work together. We meet in the rooms of recovery together, sharing the bonds of past suffering and hope for the future. We meet on mutual ground with our focus on the two things we all have in common-addiction and recovery.
Just for Today: No matter what my personal circumstances, I belong.
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