THURSDAY CHIP....

[SunnyGirl]

THURSDAY CHIP: Using talents and abilities/Disinterested in self

There are times I will deny myself, to make others happy.
I will pick up something I know Honey would like or enjoy, but
I rarely will do the same for myself. Is that disinteret in self?
Not sure......

I really don't care about stuff, maybe that is the key to
denying myself! I consider myself low maintenance, simple
needs!

I hate wasting time in a hair salon, spa treatments are out of
the question, jewelry doesn't interest me. Shopping in general
is not on my list of things I enjoy and when I do have to shop,
it's normally for the house or gifts for others.

I am sure God must have given me many unique, but so far
undeveloped, talents and gifts. Maybe those talents are just
waiting to jump out and surprise me. Or maybe some of us are
just average, ordinary, simple people, happy as clams with their
mundane lives..... ;D

[caressa]

Can sure identify with you, don't buy myself that much either. It has always been for my son. I don't like spending money on things I can't eat or drink, unless it is a bridge game.

There was a time I would never leave my house without wearing make up, dressed just so, and now I don't seem to care. Maybe it is old age. Maybe it is because I accept tha fact that you can't defy gravity forever. Maybe it is just because it seems to be a losing battle. But in truth, I like to think it is just being comfortable being myself and no longer have to hide behind masks. What you see is what you get.

[MrDuck]

Think there is a very fine line between,

wants needs and addictions

Needs don't seem to be a major problem for me as the Big Guy always makes sure I get what I need.

Now that leaves wants and additions mmmmmmmmmm That gets a lot tricker and I will justify which ever one it is I want to at the time to confince myself I am right in doing what ever.

As far as putting on a show that don't meam much to me. I am still driving my old mini van with 227,000 miles on it. Wife asked me the other day when I am going to the farm to bring the pickup back to drive during tax season. Not sure I will this year. Heck the old van runs fine. Last fall I bought an expensive Dodge Sprinter van that is load. It is parked in my shop out at the farm also. Now and than I look for a different pickup or something different. That is an addiction as there is nothing wrong with the autos I have.

Clothes I have tons of and still mostly wear the same stuff I have till they are totally shot and I mean totally shot. If I don't change size think I could go the rest of my life and not buy clothes but doubt that will happen as I think that is another of my addictions. I forgot my desk coat at the office the other day and wife asked me what I was going to wear to church. I wore one of my leather dress coats. I have two and doubt that between the two of them they have been wore a dozen times.

Tools...........Oh God that is another subject. Computers goes along the line of tools for me. I just order another brand new computer yesterday again. Think I have 2 laptops and mmmmmmm 12 desktops. Do I need them all. Actually I do need most of them but there about 3 maybe 4 that I could live with out. Sounds to me like another Ron addiction to me. Tools.......... that use to be a touch subject in my house. Wife hasn't complained to much about what I have bought last few years but she has learned it pays not to complain to go with the flow and use it to her advance.

You will love this story. A few years ago I came home one day to pick her up to go the farm. She said," Who does that belong to? There was a brand new 18' car trailer and a Case skid loader on it. After playing dumb for a while it was decided that it must be mine as I didn't steal it. She was quiet. We got down the road a few miles and she says, " We need a new water softeren." I asked what was wrong with ours and she said nothing. That she giveing ours to daughter and she wanted a new one. I asked what that was going to cost and she said $1400. I looked in the mirror at my trailer and skid loader and tought to myself, "The price of them just went up." hahaha

It is not my needs that screw me up. It is my wants and addictions. Think my wants are part of my addictions. Heck I don't know. I get all confused about them. I just know my mind is so frigal I can justiful it and ALMOST makes sense to me.

Have a great day,

Ron

[caressa]

I think this goes back to motive and intent. Am I motivated? I have a desire to live to the fullest today. What are my intentions? To help others, to be the best me in today without trying to hurt myself or others. There is nothing wrong with having things in life. I think it boils down to how we use them. Is it greed, envy, pride, etc. behind the purspose. Do I give to others, not just stuff, but time, effort, and caring. I know I have had a lot of things and have given them away to sponsees. My sponsor told me not to give more than you can afford to give away. For me it has been meditations books, i.e. Courage to Change, Just For Today, Twenty-Four Hours, Daily Reflections, Big Book, 12 Steps & 12 Traditions, In God's Care. Some of them I have replaced three times. I have my original soft cover Big Book that was given to me my first month out of treatment in January 1992. I will never give it up. An ex-boyfriend gave me a copy of the 4th Edition and I gave it to an ex-sponsee. I gave all my literature from NA to a woman who use to call me all the time and was in denial. I think she through them out, hopefully someone else got them and they helped them.