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Post by SunnyGirl on Jun 2, 2009 11:54:41 GMT -5
“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
- - Mother Teresa
In the chipping away section, today's chip was, generous/selfish.
Most people relate generosity with time or money. But for me
I've come to understand that we need to also be very generous
with our praise for other people, most especially our addicted
loved ones. Not idle praise, but when you look close enough
there are still wonderful traits that they hang onto. I try to stay
away from passing judgment, I am leaving that one up to God.
It’s far easier to see someone’s faults before seeing their
goodness. Challenge yourself to look for a person’s good
qualities, they're in there if you look hard enough. The "Law of
Attraction" says that you attract into your life whatever you think
about. If all I can think about are negative traits, this is what
the addict will show me....
The way that you judge others will be the way that you will
be judged..... and trust me, I am far from perfect!
Peace on the journey, SunnyGirl
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Post by caressa on Jun 2, 2009 16:17:24 GMT -5
When I find myself passing judgment, I know it is a time to look at myself. After all, this is a program of reflection as well as perception.
Due to my own poor self-esteem and low self-worth, I try to endorse and validate others to encourage them to seek help for themselves and am a firm believer in attraction rather than promotion.
My own son, the addict, told me to look at the person behind the addiction. Sadly, that person is getting very lost and his addiction has taken over his life.
My sponsor told me that recovery was always about looking for the postive in the negative. Some people think they should ignore the negative. To me that isn't reality. It is about how to change that negative into a positive. As I said on a resent post, everything isn't all bad or all good.
I am as powerless over his addiction as I am my own.
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Post by SunnyGirl on Jun 2, 2009 23:20:21 GMT -5
"This is a program of reflection as well as perception."
Love that saying....
Thank you for sharing Caressa!
Peace on the journey, Cherie
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Post by dg on Jun 3, 2009 12:10:08 GMT -5
Good food for thought : "This is a program of reflection as well as perception."
Recently discussed with my step mom of my sister getting out of prison that her addiction got her there in the first place she wants to stay with her and I was against it totally due to my step mom health issue on handling if she fails at staying clean while out.
Realized that I was passing a judgment on her before she can even TRY to prove herself she can remain clean and get off parole in over time.
I got to let go and let God give her that chance even tho she failed many times over before.
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Post by SunnyGirl on Jun 3, 2009 13:18:27 GMT -5
I wasn't going to respond to this post Dg, I wanted to leave your name showing on the boards.  I am just so happy to have you back on the boards..... I am saying a prayer for you and your Sister I have gone thru much the same with my Sis, she's not been in prison, but has been in jail more than a few times. I have said many times, I am a believer in.... "Where there is life, there is hope"! I will never give up hope! Understand you would be protective of Step-Mom. Will your Sis move in with her? Ouch.... That could be tricky! Keep the faith and keep an open mind, maybe this will be the time she stays clean and sober. Luv Ya, Cherie |
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Post by caressa on Jun 3, 2009 14:47:18 GMT -5
When I got clean and sober, I found that trust was something I had to earn. Why should people trust me when I had been trying to quit for eight years. I could quit but I couldn't stay quit, I always went back to using. I didn't know about the program. When I found the program, I found something that was doing for others what I hadn't been able to do for myself.
We all know, unless there is a willingness to quit, there is nothing you can do. If your Step-Mom isn't well, it is a lot of stress for her. There are no guarantees. This is a disease that is cunning, baffling and powerful.
Prayers going out for you and yours.
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Post by SunnyGirl on Jun 4, 2009 12:49:32 GMT -5
The gospel of the recovering addicts is: "One day at a time",
which essentially means that sobriety is a day-to-day journey.
I think it's our expectations for them, that becomes our
stumbling block. I've come to believe my only part in the
situation is to offer prayers for them each day.....
Peace on the journey, SunnyGirl
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Post by dg on Jun 4, 2009 12:56:16 GMT -5
The gospel of the recovering addicts is: "One day at a time",
which essentially means that sobriety is a day-to-day journey.
I think it's our expectations for them, that becomes our
stumbling block. I've come to believe my only part in the
situation is to offer prayers for them each day.....
Peace on the journey, SunnyGirl
My husband recieved a special token from his step brother, it had a stumbling block on this token, which is a gentle reminder that its up to them to take one day a time on staying clean, and to remember the powerless of the disease is on a day to day basis.
The street goes both way for the addict and for those that deals with them on a day to day thing.[/b][/size]
[/quote]
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~With Peace & Love, dg~ 8*)[/b][/size]
I am just
. I will be back looking for Lin and others.