Post by SunnyGirl on Jul 2, 2010 15:04:12 GMT -5
“But For The Grace Of God” is one of my favorite slogans.
It helps to remind me to be more compassionate with my
addicted loved ones. This slogan can help all of us avoid
getting so impatient, criticizing, resentful and vindictive,
which would hurt us as well as to others.
It helps to remind me to be more compassionate with my
addicted loved ones. This slogan can help all of us avoid
getting so impatient, criticizing, resentful and vindictive,
which would hurt us as well as to others.
About a year ago I received a phone call from our insurance
agent, most of the family uses him. Tonya was concerned
about my youngest, he showed up under the influence when
he got there to pay his car insurance. She called me to make
sure he made it home ok....
Yesterday, the same Son called (his voice was slurred) to say
hello and ended the conversation saying he had to go by and
pay insurance. With out thinking about how it might sound, I
replied, "I hope I don't get another call from Tonya". This
really set him off, he was angry and very upset that I would
make assumptions just by talking to him. He claimed he was
just tired... I immediately apologized and told him he was
100% correct and it was not mine to judge him that way... I
do make snide remarks at times and I do get impatient with
him.
I would be very upset if those around me were always watching
and sniffing around in my business. By making "off hand" remarks
and passing judgment, I think I am pushing him into a corner
and the "fight or flight" response comes out.
This is my baby and he has brought so much joy and heartache
all in his short lifetime.... I was surely blessed the day he was
born and because he is an alcoholic doesn't change a thing.
I don't have to like everything he does with his life! I have no
right to a smart mouth or superior attitude toward him either.
When we ended our conversation on the phone, I told him
I loved him with all my heart and there was nothing he could
do to change that. I told him how sorry I was and I would
try really, really hard to keep my thoughts to myself. I would
never hurt him intentionally for the world, so I intend to make
a much bigger effort to control the looks and comments that
come from me. THERE BUT BY THE GRACE OF GOD GO I...
Thanks for listening.... SunnyGirl